March 12, 2024 • 16 mins
During Women's History Month, we revisit our conversation with Wanda Ingram, Ed.D. '75, who will receive an honorary degree at Providence College’s 106th Commencement Exercises in May. Ingram, who retired in 2023 after three decades as academic advisor and undergraduate dean at the college, discusses her experience as a member of Providence College's inaugural class of women — and as one of the few women of color in that group.
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Episode Transcript
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Liz Kay (00:01):
Hello, and welcome to the Providence College podcast.
I'm your host, Liz Kay, and I'mjoined by producer, Chris Judge,
of the class of 2005. Here onthe Providence College podcast,
we bring you interesting storiesfrom the Friar family. This
week, we're talking with doctorWanda Ingram, the senior
associate dean for undergraduatestudies, the freshman and
sophomore class dean, andcochair of the MLK Convocation
Committee. This is a specialyear to talk with doctor Ingram
(00:23):
as we are celebrating the 50thanniversary of women enrolling
as undergrads.
Doctor Ingram was a member ofthe inaugural class to include
women in 1971. Doctor Ingram,thanks so much for joining us.
Wanda Ingram (00:33):
Thank you.
Liz Kay (00:35):
Well, Providence College was definitely
undergoing some changes when youjoined the community in 1971.
Can you tell us what led you toto come to Providence College?
What led you to choose to bepart of that, that innovative
pioneering class of women?
Wanda Ingram (00:51):
I was going to be a science major and was. I am
from I'm a military brat and inNewport, I would say the
majority of male teachers that Ihad in my high school, Rogers,
were all graduates of ProvidenceCollege, it seemed like. And the
school was about to go coed and,it was strongly recommended by
just about everybody in the citythat I go ahead and apply to
(01:15):
that institution. Although I wasI had my heart set set on a
couple of other places at first,but when I came to visit the
institution and I kept hearing,well, this is the 1st year of
women, but this is what we'replanning on doing, this what
we're looking for. This is whatwe're striving for.
We want you to be one of thoseindividuals that makes a
difference and and makes achange. It it it caught me and I
(01:38):
I realized, okay, let let me goahead even though there were,
what, maybe 270 women and a good2,000 plus males that were on
the campus. I mean, that'ssomething that some people would
say would be also goodinformation as well from that
perspective. But in reference tojust the challenges that were
there, I was very happy with thefact that being a chemistry
major and they had masters anddoctoral degrees in reference to
(02:02):
it, I I felt, okay, you knowwhat? If I do well in this
particular major, I can go farwith regards to it.
So it just it just checked offall the right boxes at the time.
Liz Kay (02:12):
So you were a chemistry major and they were graduate and
doctoral students, But how manyof the students, in the sciences
were women?
Wanda Ingram (02:22):
2 of us.
Liz Kay (02:24):
So 2 of 200, almost 300 students.
Wanda Ingram (02:27):
Yeah, exactly. So, I mean, everybody knew where you
were in the building. Nope, noproblem there. I never felt
unsafe. You always had thechivalry that was going on all
the time with folks looking outfor you, which was great too.
So as being a novelty as it was,and then as a as a woman, a
black woman, in an institutionlike this where there were very
few of us, there were, like, Ithink maybe 12 women total out
(02:50):
of that group that came that 1styear with us, there were some
transitions that occurred forobvious reasons, just after the
civil rights movements andetcetera, etcetera. But, there
were a lot of teaching moments,let's put it that way.
Liz Kay (03:04):
So let's dig into this a little bit more, please. There
were about 280 women thatenrolled that 1st year, and only
12 of them were women of color.How did the college help you
with that transition to collegelife?
Wanda Ingram (03:21):
Well, we started off with us coming in the summer
prior to school beginning. Andto be honest with you with with
father Morris and and doctorMcKay who were running the
program itself for the MartinLuther King scholarship program,
which is what that was part of,I was quite insulted at first
because I kept thinking, well,I'm I'm I'm really all straight
(03:41):
a student. Why why do I need tocome? Because I'm thinking of it
as being remedial work withregards to my academics. Not
realizing that there's a wholeprocess that one goes through
with regards to just, you know,relating to an institution from
other ways.
So it turned out to be one ofthe best things that could have
possibly happened. We developeda sense of community. We got to
(04:02):
know people on campus and offcampus, not only, you know,
folks of color because themajority of us were African
Americans at that time, but justto feel connected as a part of a
strong community becauseremember, we didn't have cell
phones and and and the media andwhatever to be able to make
connections with one another insocial media, etcetera. So you
needed to make those connections1 on 1 and it gave us an
(04:25):
opportunity to do that duringthe summer so that by the time
school started, we realizedthere were a lot of students
that felt, you know, that theywere really at a disadvantage
because they didn't know anyone,they didn't know their way
around, and here we are actuallyfeeling like the experts in
reference to being able to showfolks where to go, who to see,
how to talk with differentindividuals, etcetera. So it
(04:46):
really did help us to to makethat transition a lot better.
Liz Kay (04:50):
Could so you mentioned father Morris and and doctor
doctor McKay. Could you tell usmore about them and some of the
other people helped you succeedat PC?
Wanda Ingram (05:01):
Well, those were the 2 that, even when I came to
visit in this, before evenschool began and I was looking
at different colleges, thosewere the 2 that convinced me
that this was a good place tocome. Father Morris, of course,
he had a handshake that wouldbreak your hand, but other than
that, he was kind of, we allkinda considered him our adopted
(05:21):
father because he he knew andand was aware of everything. If
we had problems or questions orwhatever, we would always find
our way to him. Doctor McKay,who was my other mentor, he was
a chemistry professor on top ofit even though I did not have
him for class, but he was alwaysthere and and convinced me to
serve on the MLK, scholarshipcommittee as a student
representative as well. So hehelped me with all of my
(05:43):
different leadership types ofskills and when I learned,
father Morris was just there foreverybody in reference to he was
considered our adopted father.
Liz Kay (05:51):
And father Morris and doctor McCabe were 2 of the 4
people who really got the MLKscholarship program Yes. Going
Yes. That have been honored asvision award recipients
themselves Mhmm. Which is whichis phenomenal. Do you have any
I'm curious how you feel aboutif at MLK Day or if you reflect
on this connection I mean, itwas there.
(06:12):
They were inspired by doctorKing so inspired by doctor King
to start this program atProvidence College. I feel like
there's gotta be a connectionthere for you or a special way
to, remember doctor King. If itwere not for that scholarship
program, would you have come toProvidence College?
Wanda Ingram (06:28):
Probably not. Probably not. And it's funny
that you asked me that question.I never really had thought of it
that way, but the the answercame out quick enough. Yeah.
Liz Kay (06:37):
So what brought you back to Providence College many
years later?
Wanda Ingram (06:41):
It's the 75th anniversary committee. I served
on that one because fatherQuigley, who, was our chaplain
back then, so he was another onethat was very close to, our
population of of students whileI was a student here. He
convinced me to at least thinkabout the possibility of coming
back to PC. I was working and Imean, commuting to
(07:04):
Massachusetts, living in RhodeIsland. I had a a young family,
baby, and he he just said allthe right things and and kept
talking about, well, we don'thave a real academic dean for
freshman students and Iunderstand you you all of your
work is about that whole aspectof transitions as a therapist,
as one who oversees, studentorganizations, and so on and so
(07:26):
forth.
Would you be interested in thisposition that we're we're
developing? And I said, whatdoes it look like? And next
thing I know we're havingconversations about what it
should look like. And now I'mrealizing, okay, I think I'm
hoping to write my own jobdescription here. But needless
to say, came in, applied for it,interviewed doctor McKay and all
(07:47):
the other individuals I alreadyknew among others and realized
it was gonna be a good fit.
There was plenty to be donehere.
Liz Kay (07:53):
And I'm sure that job has evolved considerably. It's
ballooned. Ballooned is probablythe best way to describe it. So
if just thinking about your ownwork in the last 2 years, you've
been doing this work since youarrived. And forgive me.
When when did you arrive atreturn to Providence College?
Wanda Ingram (08:15):
1990.
Liz Kay (08:18):
It's been a minute. Yes. It's been a minute.
Wanda Ingram (08:20):
A while. I said I'd be here maybe about 5 years.
I lied.
Liz Kay (08:26):
You know, we we were talking, about how your job has
evolved and ballooned, but I'msure these last 2 years
particularly have beenchallenged being the
understatement, of course. Howhas your work helping 1st year
students and their families getadjusted to college life changed
as a result of the pandemic?What were some of the biggest
(08:49):
challenges, and what have beensome of the it couldn't all have
been bad. Were there any thingsthat, you you think going
forward you might change for thefor the that might change for
the better?
Wanda Ingram (09:00):
Because it's it's still evolving, it's kind of a
hard question to answer rightnow. I mean, I think we're kind
of making this up as we goalong. Folks had said when the
pandemic hit that, to come upwith the vaccine in this shorter
turnaround time was virtuallyimpossible and yet here we are
and we're talking about boostersand and understanding how that
(09:21):
particular, you know, virus hasevolved even again. So I see
this as a work in progress.There's a lot of things that we
haven't really realized yet inreference to the fallout from
what students have gone throughbeing sequestered during high
school and then beingsequestered while being here on
the campus.
(09:42):
The whole aspect of becoming acommunity is a little bit
different because I think thatwith cell phones and and being
up on social media and the wholedigital identity, that it's a
different kind of animal thanwhat I was accustomed to when I
arrived at college. And, we'renot quite sure, at least when as
(10:04):
as I teach in studentdevelopment theory in at the
graduate level and I speak withmy students, we're not quite
sure yet exactly what the it isthat we're going to have to kind
of work on because it is stilldefinitely evolving, it's
because it's not over yet.
Liz Kay (10:19):
Everything is still in flux.
Wanda Ingram (10:21):
It's still in flux and the lack of control, I think
for everybody, I think it'sgetting to even the adults and
the grown ups, the old folks aswell, including yours truly, in
reference to trying to cope withbecause they're so much beyond
our control. It just makes youuncomfortable. And trying to
explain that to students when wedon't have the answers for
ourselves, not always it's notalways easy.
Liz Kay (10:41):
In 2001, you and your colleague, Jackie McKay,
published a guide for familiescalled Let the Journey Begin, a
parent's guide monthly guide forto the college experience. What
are some of the the bits ofadvice that you shared in that
book that you feel remain truetoday for today's families?
Wanda Ingram (10:59):
Well, having families understand that there
is a process that students gothrough and that they can't
solve everything for their theirsons and daughters, I think has
always been that common messagethat still rings true. And, even
with COVID and even with, ourour parents that are trying to
(11:20):
trying to plow the road a littlebit more in reference to the I I
think of them sometimes as thesnowplows because they're trying
to clear all the snow and iceoff the ground before their
child walks through. And that'snot necessarily gonna be the
thing that's gonna help thembenefit the most from this
growth and and and the wholeprocess. Sometimes you have to
kind of slip and slide a littlebit and that was the case back
(11:40):
then when we wrote the book andit's still the case right now.
It's just more biblicalproportions I would say in
reference to some of the thingsthat they're trying to cope
with.
But it's still, I mean, I thinkit's pretty much, pretty
consistent. But as, of theparents are not quite sure how
best to deal with these kinds ofthings right now even for
themselves. So I I tell parentsbe as honest as you possibly
(12:02):
can. Don't speak for Johnny orSusie or whomever. Let them talk
and we'll try to work on ittogether and we'll pull you in
but we need to, 1st andforemost, have those kinds of
difficult conversations anddialogues with your child and
then help them kind of figure itout and they can bounce those
kinds of things off of you.
(12:23):
And that's part of the wholevalue system that I think we
have to kind of reinforce withthe parents too.
Liz Kay (12:28):
That the parents are support, but not they're not
speaking on behalf of theirchildren.
Wanda Ingram (12:33):
Exactly. Yeah. And with COVID and whatever, I found
that, parents were kind ofgetting back to that. Well, I'm
and I will ask, well, where'sJohnny or where's Susie or
Amanda who or whomever it is.Well, they're they're busy right
now.
Well, I'm glad they're busy,but, we need I need to have that
conversation with the student.And we can talk with you
afterwards, but we need to havethat conversation together
(12:56):
because yeah. It and it's it'sgetting back to even 911 once
again, which I think kindastarted a lot of this in
reference to protecting yourchild. And as a parent and a
grandparent, I understand thatfully, but we have to allow them
to to grow. And the only waythat that's gonna happen is with
some some challenges indevelopment.
Liz Kay (13:15):
But each one of those challenges is practice for when
they go off to be, you know,full grown adults themselves one
day. Right?
Wanda Ingram (13:21):
Right. Exactly. And you're not always gonna have
all the right answers, andthat's we'll be fine with that.
It's gonna take some time.
Liz Kay (13:27):
So, Wanda, before you I let you go, I can't resist
asking you about your creativeside. I'm sure many people, many
alumni have come through youroffice and had may not have even
known, about all the work you doon your own, and I'm hoping that
you can tell us how, that helpedyou through the pandemic as
well. Can you tell us about someof your creative endeavors?
Wanda Ingram (13:48):
I have an art background. And originally, when
I started talking about college,I was thinking about going to
art school instead of a regularliberal arts institution or,
science institution as well.Even though I could do the
chemistry and whatever, I'vealways done artwork as well. But
my mother, I think, made it veryclear and she was absolutely
(14:11):
right, especially as a militarywife where, you know, they're
just the facts man kind of kindof way of of raising your child
as well. You only like to doyour artwork when you want to do
it, So you're probably not gonnaeat a whole lot because you're
not gonna get, you're not gonnaget paid because there are
certain times when you don'twanna do anything artistic at
all.
(14:31):
And she was absolutely right. SoI tell my students all the time,
we have a lot of abilities, butsome things we're going to find
that they're going to go downthe path of being
extracurriculars instead. Andthat's fine because that's what
keeps you keeps you level inreference to dealing with all
the other negative things attimes. And I'm a perfect example
of that. I mean, I do a littlebit of this and that all the
(14:53):
time.
I I do a lot of sewing. I'vemade many costumes for my
granddaughter, and anyone whowalks in my office will see all
of the different outfits thatshe's I mean, Disney has nothing
on me in reference to some ofthe things that I have been able
to make, and it's wonderful. Imake a lot of jewelry, a lot of
folks are wearing a lot of thethings that I have made. I make
a lot of cards, especially popup cards because the the science
(15:15):
of physics and how they pop up,the angles, I'm fascinated by
that so I make a lot ofthree-dimensional types of
cards. I do a lot of glassetching.
I do a lot of wood burning. Sothose are the kinds of things
that have really kept me levelin reference to just coping with
things and watching less TV anddoing more artistic activities.
(15:36):
I have a studio in my housewhich has moved from not one
bedroom, but now 2. So it hasstarted to take over.
Liz Kay (15:44):
But, but I'm glad to hear that your passions have so
much real estate in your home.
Wanda Ingram (15:50):
That's fantastic. They do.
Liz Kay (15:54):
Wanda, it's been wonderful chatting with you
today. Thank you so much forjoining us.
Wanda Ingram (15:58):
Thank you for your patience and your time. You take
care.
Liz Kay (16:01):
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Thanks for listening, and goFriars.
Hello, and welcome to the Providence College podcast.
I'm your host, Liz Kay, and I'mjoined by producer, Chris Judge,
of the class of 2005. Here onthe Providence College podcast,
we bring you interesting storiesfrom the Friar family. This
week, we're talking with doctorWanda Ingram, the senior
associate dean for undergraduatestudies, the freshman and
sophomore class dean, andcochair of the MLK Convocation
Committee. This is a specialyear to talk with doctor Ingram
(00:23):
as we are celebrating the 50thanniversary of women enrolling
as undergrads.
Doctor Ingram was a member ofthe inaugural class to include
women in 1971. Doctor Ingram,thanks so much for joining us.
Wanda Ingram (00:33):
Thank you.
Liz Kay (00:35):
Well, Providence College was definitely
undergoing some changes when youjoined the community in 1971.
Can you tell us what led you toto come to Providence College?
What led you to choose to bepart of that, that innovative
pioneering class of women?
Wanda Ingram (00:51):
I was going to be a science major and was. I am
from I'm a military brat and inNewport, I would say the
majority of male teachers that Ihad in my high school, Rogers,
were all graduates of ProvidenceCollege, it seemed like. And the
school was about to go coed and,it was strongly recommended by
just about everybody in the citythat I go ahead and apply to
(01:15):
that institution. Although I wasI had my heart set set on a
couple of other places at first,but when I came to visit the
institution and I kept hearing,well, this is the 1st year of
women, but this is what we'replanning on doing, this what
we're looking for. This is whatwe're striving for.
We want you to be one of thoseindividuals that makes a
difference and and makes achange. It it it caught me and I
(01:38):
I realized, okay, let let me goahead even though there were,
what, maybe 270 women and a good2,000 plus males that were on
the campus. I mean, that'ssomething that some people would
say would be also goodinformation as well from that
perspective. But in reference tojust the challenges that were
there, I was very happy with thefact that being a chemistry
major and they had masters anddoctoral degrees in reference to
(02:02):
it, I I felt, okay, you knowwhat? If I do well in this
particular major, I can go farwith regards to it.
So it just it just checked offall the right boxes at the time.
Liz Kay (02:12):
So you were a chemistry major and they were graduate and
doctoral students, But how manyof the students, in the sciences
were women?
Wanda Ingram (02:22):
2 of us.
Liz Kay (02:24):
So 2 of 200, almost 300 students.
Wanda Ingram (02:27):
Yeah, exactly. So, I mean, everybody knew where you
were in the building. Nope, noproblem there. I never felt
unsafe. You always had thechivalry that was going on all
the time with folks looking outfor you, which was great too.
So as being a novelty as it was,and then as a as a woman, a
black woman, in an institutionlike this where there were very
few of us, there were, like, Ithink maybe 12 women total out
(02:50):
of that group that came that 1styear with us, there were some
transitions that occurred forobvious reasons, just after the
civil rights movements andetcetera, etcetera. But, there
were a lot of teaching moments,let's put it that way.
Liz Kay (03:04):
So let's dig into this a little bit more, please. There
were about 280 women thatenrolled that 1st year, and only
12 of them were women of color.How did the college help you
with that transition to collegelife?
Wanda Ingram (03:21):
Well, we started off with us coming in the summer
prior to school beginning. Andto be honest with you with with
father Morris and and doctorMcKay who were running the
program itself for the MartinLuther King scholarship program,
which is what that was part of,I was quite insulted at first
because I kept thinking, well,I'm I'm I'm really all straight
(03:41):
a student. Why why do I need tocome? Because I'm thinking of it
as being remedial work withregards to my academics. Not
realizing that there's a wholeprocess that one goes through
with regards to just, you know,relating to an institution from
other ways.
So it turned out to be one ofthe best things that could have
possibly happened. We developeda sense of community. We got to
(04:02):
know people on campus and offcampus, not only, you know,
folks of color because themajority of us were African
Americans at that time, but justto feel connected as a part of a
strong community becauseremember, we didn't have cell
phones and and and the media andwhatever to be able to make
connections with one another insocial media, etcetera. So you
needed to make those connections1 on 1 and it gave us an
(04:25):
opportunity to do that duringthe summer so that by the time
school started, we realizedthere were a lot of students
that felt, you know, that theywere really at a disadvantage
because they didn't know anyone,they didn't know their way
around, and here we are actuallyfeeling like the experts in
reference to being able to showfolks where to go, who to see,
how to talk with differentindividuals, etcetera. So it
(04:46):
really did help us to to makethat transition a lot better.
Liz Kay (04:50):
Could so you mentioned father Morris and and doctor
doctor McKay. Could you tell usmore about them and some of the
other people helped you succeedat PC?
Wanda Ingram (05:01):
Well, those were the 2 that, even when I came to
visit in this, before evenschool began and I was looking
at different colleges, thosewere the 2 that convinced me
that this was a good place tocome. Father Morris, of course,
he had a handshake that wouldbreak your hand, but other than
that, he was kind of, we allkinda considered him our adopted
(05:21):
father because he he knew andand was aware of everything. If
we had problems or questions orwhatever, we would always find
our way to him. Doctor McKay,who was my other mentor, he was
a chemistry professor on top ofit even though I did not have
him for class, but he was alwaysthere and and convinced me to
serve on the MLK, scholarshipcommittee as a student
representative as well. So hehelped me with all of my
(05:43):
different leadership types ofskills and when I learned,
father Morris was just there foreverybody in reference to he was
considered our adopted father.
Liz Kay (05:51):
And father Morris and doctor McCabe were 2 of the 4
people who really got the MLKscholarship program Yes. Going
Yes. That have been honored asvision award recipients
themselves Mhmm. Which is whichis phenomenal. Do you have any
I'm curious how you feel aboutif at MLK Day or if you reflect
on this connection I mean, itwas there.
(06:12):
They were inspired by doctorKing so inspired by doctor King
to start this program atProvidence College. I feel like
there's gotta be a connectionthere for you or a special way
to, remember doctor King. If itwere not for that scholarship
program, would you have come toProvidence College?
Wanda Ingram (06:28):
Probably not. Probably not. And it's funny
that you asked me that question.I never really had thought of it
that way, but the the answercame out quick enough. Yeah.
Liz Kay (06:37):
So what brought you back to Providence College many
years later?
Wanda Ingram (06:41):
It's the 75th anniversary committee. I served
on that one because fatherQuigley, who, was our chaplain
back then, so he was another onethat was very close to, our
population of of students whileI was a student here. He
convinced me to at least thinkabout the possibility of coming
back to PC. I was working and Imean, commuting to
(07:04):
Massachusetts, living in RhodeIsland. I had a a young family,
baby, and he he just said allthe right things and and kept
talking about, well, we don'thave a real academic dean for
freshman students and Iunderstand you you all of your
work is about that whole aspectof transitions as a therapist,
as one who oversees, studentorganizations, and so on and so
(07:26):
forth.
Would you be interested in thisposition that we're we're
developing? And I said, whatdoes it look like? And next
thing I know we're havingconversations about what it
should look like. And now I'mrealizing, okay, I think I'm
hoping to write my own jobdescription here. But needless
to say, came in, applied for it,interviewed doctor McKay and all
(07:47):
the other individuals I alreadyknew among others and realized
it was gonna be a good fit.
There was plenty to be donehere.
Liz Kay (07:53):
And I'm sure that job has evolved considerably. It's
ballooned. Ballooned is probablythe best way to describe it. So
if just thinking about your ownwork in the last 2 years, you've
been doing this work since youarrived. And forgive me.
When when did you arrive atreturn to Providence College?
Wanda Ingram (08:15):
1990.
Liz Kay (08:18):
It's been a minute. Yes. It's been a minute.
Wanda Ingram (08:20):
A while. I said I'd be here maybe about 5 years.
I lied.
Liz Kay (08:26):
You know, we we were talking, about how your job has
evolved and ballooned, but I'msure these last 2 years
particularly have beenchallenged being the
understatement, of course. Howhas your work helping 1st year
students and their families getadjusted to college life changed
as a result of the pandemic?What were some of the biggest
(08:49):
challenges, and what have beensome of the it couldn't all have
been bad. Were there any thingsthat, you you think going
forward you might change for thefor the that might change for
the better?
Wanda Ingram (09:00):
Because it's it's still evolving, it's kind of a
hard question to answer rightnow. I mean, I think we're kind
of making this up as we goalong. Folks had said when the
pandemic hit that, to come upwith the vaccine in this shorter
turnaround time was virtuallyimpossible and yet here we are
and we're talking about boostersand and understanding how that
(09:21):
particular, you know, virus hasevolved even again. So I see
this as a work in progress.There's a lot of things that we
haven't really realized yet inreference to the fallout from
what students have gone throughbeing sequestered during high
school and then beingsequestered while being here on
the campus.
(09:42):
The whole aspect of becoming acommunity is a little bit
different because I think thatwith cell phones and and being
up on social media and the wholedigital identity, that it's a
different kind of animal thanwhat I was accustomed to when I
arrived at college. And, we'renot quite sure, at least when as
(10:04):
as I teach in studentdevelopment theory in at the
graduate level and I speak withmy students, we're not quite
sure yet exactly what the it isthat we're going to have to kind
of work on because it is stilldefinitely evolving, it's
because it's not over yet.
Liz Kay (10:19):
Everything is still in flux.
Wanda Ingram (10:21):
It's still in flux and the lack of control, I think
for everybody, I think it'sgetting to even the adults and
the grown ups, the old folks aswell, including yours truly, in
reference to trying to cope withbecause they're so much beyond
our control. It just makes youuncomfortable. And trying to
explain that to students when wedon't have the answers for
ourselves, not always it's notalways easy.
Liz Kay (10:41):
In 2001, you and your colleague, Jackie McKay,
published a guide for familiescalled Let the Journey Begin, a
parent's guide monthly guide forto the college experience. What
are some of the the bits ofadvice that you shared in that
book that you feel remain truetoday for today's families?
Wanda Ingram (10:59):
Well, having families understand that there
is a process that students gothrough and that they can't
solve everything for their theirsons and daughters, I think has
always been that common messagethat still rings true. And, even
with COVID and even with, ourour parents that are trying to
(11:20):
trying to plow the road a littlebit more in reference to the I I
think of them sometimes as thesnowplows because they're trying
to clear all the snow and iceoff the ground before their
child walks through. And that'snot necessarily gonna be the
thing that's gonna help thembenefit the most from this
growth and and and the wholeprocess. Sometimes you have to
kind of slip and slide a littlebit and that was the case back
(11:40):
then when we wrote the book andit's still the case right now.
It's just more biblicalproportions I would say in
reference to some of the thingsthat they're trying to cope
with.
But it's still, I mean, I thinkit's pretty much, pretty
consistent. But as, of theparents are not quite sure how
best to deal with these kinds ofthings right now even for
themselves. So I I tell parentsbe as honest as you possibly
(12:02):
can. Don't speak for Johnny orSusie or whomever. Let them talk
and we'll try to work on ittogether and we'll pull you in
but we need to, 1st andforemost, have those kinds of
difficult conversations anddialogues with your child and
then help them kind of figure itout and they can bounce those
kinds of things off of you.
(12:23):
And that's part of the wholevalue system that I think we
have to kind of reinforce withthe parents too.
Liz Kay (12:28):
That the parents are support, but not they're not
speaking on behalf of theirchildren.
Wanda Ingram (12:33):
Exactly. Yeah. And with COVID and whatever, I found
that, parents were kind ofgetting back to that. Well, I'm
and I will ask, well, where'sJohnny or where's Susie or
Amanda who or whomever it is.Well, they're they're busy right
now.
Well, I'm glad they're busy,but, we need I need to have that
conversation with the student.And we can talk with you
afterwards, but we need to havethat conversation together
(12:56):
because yeah. It and it's it'sgetting back to even 911 once
again, which I think kindastarted a lot of this in
reference to protecting yourchild. And as a parent and a
grandparent, I understand thatfully, but we have to allow them
to to grow. And the only waythat that's gonna happen is with
some some challenges indevelopment.
Liz Kay (13:15):
But each one of those challenges is practice for when
they go off to be, you know,full grown adults themselves one
day. Right?
Wanda Ingram (13:21):
Right. Exactly. And you're not always gonna have
all the right answers, andthat's we'll be fine with that.
It's gonna take some time.
Liz Kay (13:27):
So, Wanda, before you I let you go, I can't resist
asking you about your creativeside. I'm sure many people, many
alumni have come through youroffice and had may not have even
known, about all the work you doon your own, and I'm hoping that
you can tell us how, that helpedyou through the pandemic as
well. Can you tell us about someof your creative endeavors?
Wanda Ingram (13:48):
I have an art background. And originally, when
I started talking about college,I was thinking about going to
art school instead of a regularliberal arts institution or,
science institution as well.Even though I could do the
chemistry and whatever, I'vealways done artwork as well. But
my mother, I think, made it veryclear and she was absolutely
(14:11):
right, especially as a militarywife where, you know, they're
just the facts man kind of kindof way of of raising your child
as well. You only like to doyour artwork when you want to do
it, So you're probably not gonnaeat a whole lot because you're
not gonna get, you're not gonnaget paid because there are
certain times when you don'twanna do anything artistic at
all.
(14:31):
And she was absolutely right. SoI tell my students all the time,
we have a lot of abilities, butsome things we're going to find
that they're going to go downthe path of being
extracurriculars instead. Andthat's fine because that's what
keeps you keeps you level inreference to dealing with all
the other negative things attimes. And I'm a perfect example
of that. I mean, I do a littlebit of this and that all the
(14:53):
time.
I I do a lot of sewing. I'vemade many costumes for my
granddaughter, and anyone whowalks in my office will see all
of the different outfits thatshe's I mean, Disney has nothing
on me in reference to some ofthe things that I have been able
to make, and it's wonderful. Imake a lot of jewelry, a lot of
folks are wearing a lot of thethings that I have made. I make
a lot of cards, especially popup cards because the the science
(15:15):
of physics and how they pop up,the angles, I'm fascinated by
that so I make a lot ofthree-dimensional types of
cards. I do a lot of glassetching.
I do a lot of wood burning. Sothose are the kinds of things
that have really kept me levelin reference to just coping with
things and watching less TV anddoing more artistic activities.
(15:36):
I have a studio in my housewhich has moved from not one
bedroom, but now 2. So it hasstarted to take over.
Liz Kay (15:44):
But, but I'm glad to hear that your passions have so
much real estate in your home.
Wanda Ingram (15:50):
That's fantastic. They do.
Liz Kay (15:54):
Wanda, it's been wonderful chatting with you
today. Thank you so much forjoining us.
Wanda Ingram (15:58):
Thank you for your patience and your time. You take
care.
Liz Kay (16:01):
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