Jay Conner's Guide to Creating Win-Win Opportunities Using Private Money

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“Revolutionize Investing With Private Money with Jay Conner!”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3eVMKVZhLv4&t=1425s   

If you’re looking to fast-track your real estate investing journey, there’s one topic you simply can’t afford to ignore—private money. In a recent episode of "Raising Private Money," renowned investor Jay Conner sat down with Kenner French for a high-impact conversation about how private money has transformed his business and the lives of his investors. Here are the key takeaways you need to know.

From Banker Rejection to Private Money Revolution

Jay Conner did not start with a Rolodex full of eager lenders. In fact, he shared how, for years, he relied on traditional banking relationships for his real estate deals—until everything changed during the 2009 financial crisis. When his go-to line of credit was suddenly yanked with no warning, Jay had two deals under contract and nowhere to turn for funding.

What seemed like a crisis quickly turned into the opportunity of a lifetime: the discovery of private money. Unlike hard money or institutional funds, private money comes from individuals—ordinary people with capital in investment accounts or retirement funds, seeking better returns. 

According to Jay Conner, "I’m talking about doing business with individuals, human beings just like you, just like me, that loan money to us real estate investors either from their investment capital or their retirement funds."

The "Never Ask" Method: Attracting Private Lenders

One of the most surprising aspects of Jay Conner’s approach is that he never asks for money. Instead, he separates the conversation between teaching prospects about private lending and presenting them with deals.

Here’s how it works:

1. Education First: Jay Conner puts on his “teacher hat” and educates potential lenders about what private money is, how the process works, and the safety and returns they can expect. There’s no property or deal discussed at this point—just learning.
2. Find Out Their Capability: Prospective lenders are invited to share how much they might be interested in investing and whether it’s in cash or retirement funds.
3. The "Good News" Phone Call: When a suitable deal arises, Jay Conner calls the investor and announces, "I can now put your money to work." He specifies the amount, property, and closing details—but never asks, “Would you like to fund this deal?” The deal matches the criteria already discussed, so moving forward is a logical next step.

This technique eliminates the fear of rejection, positions the investor as an opportunity provider, and keeps the relationship collaborative instead of desperate. As Jay puts it, "Desperation has got a smell to it... It’s all about leading with a servant's heart, truly. Because there’s more money available than there are deals.”

Why Private Money Changes Everything

Jay Conner emphasized that with private money, real estate entrepreneurs are no longer at the mercy of strict lender requirements. "In this world, the lender does not make the rules. We make the rules. We set the interest rate, we set the terms," he explained. This only works, he notes, when you’re educating people who haven’t yet heard about private lending.

And the benefits aren’t exclusive to investors. Many of Jay Conner’s private lenders have written him heartfelt notes about the life-changing impact of reliable, higher returns—often turning stagnant CDs or underperforming stocks into vehicles for financial freedom.

Golden Lessons and Pitfalls to Avoid

For those just starting, Jay C