The Power of Servant Leadership and Private Money in Real Estate Investing

***Guest Appearance

Credits to:

https://www.youtube.com/@whynotre 

"Why Not? Real Estate Podcast - Jay Conner"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4cjoUrmu89c 

If you're a real estate investor or aspiring to become one, you know the age-old challenge: finding the funds to finance your deals. The traditional route—knocking on the doors of banks and hard money lenders—is fraught with red tape, credit checks, rigid terms, and, occasionally, heartbreak. But what if there was another way to secure capital that gives you more control, flexibility, and freedom to scale your business? Enter private money—a method that Jay Conner, known as the “Private Money Authority,” has mastered over 20 years and more than 475 deals.

Recently, Jay Conner sat down with Brian Lucier on the “Why Not Real Estate” podcast to share his journey from the mobile home industry to building a seven-figure real estate business and becoming a private money evangelist. Here are some of the most impactful takeaways from their lively conversation.

From Mobile Homes to Real Estate Mogul

Jay’s entry into real estate wasn’t by accident. Raised by a developer father, he was surrounded by conversations about business, finance, and property development from a young age. By 12, Jay was already helping vet credit histories for home buyers—a skill set that would serve him well later. But when the mobile home industry’s financing dried up in the early 2000s, Jay pivoted decisively into real estate flipping.

Inspired by friends who successfully made $30,000 in their first flip, Jay realized the potential gains in single-family housing were far greater than the margins he was chasing in manufactured housing.

The Game-Changing Crisis of 2009

For the first six years of his real estate career, Jay did what most investors do: he went to the bank, pleaded for loans, and built his operations around institutional funding. All that came to a halt in January 2009, when his bank cut off his lines of credit—a scenario painfully familiar to many seasoned investors.

But instead of packing it in, Jay saw this crisis as his catalyst. “Who do I know that can help me fix this problem?” he asked himself. That led him to discover the world of private money—ordinary individuals looking for secure and solid returns outside of Wall Street. In 90 days, Jay raised over $2 million in private capital and never looked back.

What is Private Money?

Unlike hard money or bank loans, private money comes from individuals—often within your existing network—who want to invest their capital for stable, attractive returns. Instead of you chasing the lender’s criteria, you set the rules: interest rates, terms, and how deals are structured. And because it’s relationship-driven, private money fosters trust and repeat business.

Jay emphasizes that raising private money isn’t about asking for a handout or “pitching” a deal in desperation. It’s about education—teaching friends, colleagues, and acquaintances about safe, asset-backed opportunities where everyone wins.

Key Lessons for Investors

1. Have Multiple Exit Strategies: Jay’s first piece of hard-earned advice is never to rely on a single exit plan. Whether you’re flipping or holding for rental, know your numbers and have options. If you get stuck with a property, you need a plan B (or C).
2. Build Relationships, Not Just Transactions: Success in private money is built on trust. Teach potential lenders the value of your opportunity and let them choose to participate.
3. Automate and Systematize: Jay has automated his business to run in less than 10 hours a week. The secret? Focus on what you do best, delegate, and trust your team and systems.
4. Always Be Learning: Whether you’re a newcomer or a veteran, see