Episode Transcript
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(00:02):
Okay, I have to start this episode bysaying I've been in a mood lately, but
not like in a bad way, but in a I'm sodone with my own excuses, and I just
want to get shit done kind of way.
Like, I literally caught myselfoverthinking about something the other
day, something that I know that Ineed to do, which is It's working out.
(00:24):
I need to move my body.
I have been in a workout funkfor months now and I had to
stop and be like, girl, really?
We're not doing this today.
And listen, I know I'm notthe only one who does this.
We all get stuck in these loops ofwaiting and thinking and overanalyzing
and hoping that something outside of usis going to change everything, but let
(00:47):
me just rip the bandaid off real quick.
Okay.
Okay.
Nobody is coming to save you.
It's on you to change your life.
And that's actually the bestnews ever, because it also
means that you're in control.
And it's so much about what wetalk about here at Her Heart Heals.
So if you're here, I know that youare the type of woman who He likes to
(01:09):
just take life by the horns and takeresponsibility for your life and level up.
And so today we are diving intosome hard hitting truths that I am
holding both of your hands through.
When I tell you, you might notwant to hear them, but you need to,
I'm sending it with so much love.
(01:30):
And before you think I'mcoming for you, just know.
I'm calling myself out to thisepisode is about waking up, getting
unstuck and actually moving forward.
This one's spicy, not gonna lie.
Let's get into it.
You're listening to HerHeart Heals Divorce Radio.
(01:52):
Hi, I'm Christina Cuevas.
Seven years ago, I went througha divorce and it completely
turned my world upside down.
And I'm so glad it did.
I documented my healing to shareinformation with other women going
through their own divorce journey.
And now, With thousands of downloadsaround the world from divorced women
just like you, I'm here to show youhow to ditch the shame around divorce
(02:15):
and finally heal so that you canregain the confidence to create your
most abundant and joyful future.
I'm so glad you're here.
This is Her Heart Heals Divorce Radio.
Welcome back to anotherepisode of rebuilding you.
I'm your host, Christina.
I'm so happy that you're here.
I actually wasn't going to be doinga podcast episode release this
(02:37):
week, but I have just been feelingsome type of way internally and
having this internal dialogue withinmyself and then having conversations
over with my friends on Instagram.
And I'm like, okay, I need tojust, I need to get this all out.
So as I mentioned in the intro, thisone's a little bit spicy and it's
(02:58):
a lot of harsh truths, but like,I feel it's, it's a good thing.
We're gonna open portals with this one.
So I actually feel like the women thatI've been talking to who have also
been feeling this way It's becausespring is right around the corner
and I have been saying this for yearsBut spring is the true new year It's
when nature is waking up and I feellike we all get inspired to take
(03:24):
massive action Right around this time.
So If you're feeling this like itch tomake moves, this is why I felt like it
was the perfect time to just give yousome of these harsh truths, a little swift
kick in the boots, because, you know,sometimes we need that extra motivation.
(03:44):
We need our girls to just kind oftell us like, Hey, here's what it is.
And, and so I'm going to be giving youthese harsh truths, but with each one,
I'm going to give you a solution, alittle mini action that you can take to
start breaking some of these patterns.
And so we're just going to go ahead andget right into it with the first one.
(04:08):
Okay.
And I also want to say preface, sorry,before I get into this is that I have
had all of these conversations Withmyself, okay, so there's that so the
first thing is like nobody's coming topull you out of this Not your friends.
Not your ex realizing his mistakesand coming back not a damn sign from
(04:33):
the universe That was a harsh one forme the moment that you realize that
it's up to you You take your powerback but if you keep waiting for For
someone or something to change beforeyou start living your life, you'll
stay stuck in this exact spot forever.
I think of that movie, the Sandlotfor, uh, for, all right, sorry.
(04:59):
Thanks for letting me entertainmy inner child right there.
Um, I know it's overwhelming.
I know that it's scary, but you don'tneed another breakthrough moment.
I have some clients who are addictedto the healing piece of it, right?
Where it's like, we constantly want to bein this communication with the universe.
(05:21):
And we see these signs and we're like,Oh my gosh, what does that sign mean?
And going all the way, and we canget super airy fairy about, you
know, going deep and seeing signsand getting more breakthroughs.
But the reality is that we justneed to put in the reps, girl.
We need consistent action,even when it's uncomfortable.
(05:43):
And so for the mini call to action that Iwant to give you is what's one small thing
that you can do today to move forward.
Not tomorrow, not next week, today.
And with these call to actions too,like use me to hold you accountable.
And by that, I mean, Pick some ofthese actions and let me know when
(06:08):
you actually do them so that I knowwho my girls are that are taking
action in their lives right now.
So if you're going to be doing any ofthis, any of your responses, DM me over
on Instagram and let's talk about them.
Okay.
And this one might sting a little, butlisten, your ex, he was toxic for sure.
(06:35):
Or she, yes, you were hurt.
But if you keep focusing on what theydid, you stay stuck in victim mode.
And I say that with lovebecause I've been there.
The real work isn't justprocessing what happened.
It's a looking at yourself andasking, why did I tolerate that?
(06:55):
What patterns do I need to changeso that I never accept less again?
And that's truly where your power is.
So I have a fun journalprompt for you for this one.
And I want you to journal what's onepattern in your past relationships.
And I want you to think back,not just from your marriage, but
(07:16):
all the relationships we've had.
Before then and think of like what'sthe one thing that was always in
common that you were doing And what'sa pattern in your past relationships
that you don't want to repeat again?
So that is going to bring forwardPatterns and things that are in
(07:37):
your control that you can changeSo that you are now breaking that
cycle and up leveling in your life.
So
Okay, quick pause.
I want to talk to all of my girlsbecause I know you're listening.
I know you feel this episodein your soul right now.
You're ambitious.
You're smart.
You've done the work.
(07:57):
You've read the books, listened to thepodcast, had the realizations and yet.
You still feel stuck.
You're wondering why after allthis personal growth, you're still
in the same place emotionally,financially, maybe even physically.
You're tired of spinning your wheelsand you're so over waiting for the
right time to finally move forward.
(08:18):
Your greatest comeback was made for you.
This is where we stop justunderstanding our patterns and
actually start changing them.
It's a self paced program designed to takeyou from just surviving after divorce to
stepping into your next level life withoutoverthinking yourself into oblivion.
And here's the best part.
(08:39):
It's actually really, really affordable.
I know investing in yourself can feelscary, but I made sure that this is
accessible because I believe in this work.
If you're serious about gettingunstuck and finally making moves
that you know you're meant tomake, get on the wait list.
You'll get first dibs on the lowestprice that it's ever going to be.
(09:00):
Plus exclusive bonuses.
The link is in the show notes, or youcan always DM me on Instagram, come
back and I'll send you the details.
Alright, back to the episodebecause we're not done yet.
Okay.
So the next thing is that if youdon't learn to love your own company,
you're going to keep searchingfor validation in other people.
(09:20):
Feeling lonely doesn'tmean that you need someone.
It means that you need a deeperrelationship with yourself.
I've often found that most of the timewe just got really good at quieting
that inner voice so much that we don'teven know what she sounds like anymore.
And we start to look at externalthings to replace that voice,
(09:44):
like for the validation.
If you can't sit with yourself rightnow, you're going to keep attracting
people who reinforce your own self doubt.
And that's just facts.
Like if you keep doing this pattern,It's always going to bring you all
of these other external solutionsthat make your thought true.
(10:09):
So if you have that belief about yourself,you're going to go out there and search
for all the things to make it true.
So here's a challenge.
Take yourself on a solo date this week.
Feel the discomfort.
I want you to push yourself to your edgehere, and I want you to let it change you.
(10:31):
I want you to be able to feelthe edge and also going in with
the intention that you're doingthis to spend time with yourself.
Overthinking is justan excuse to stay safe.
You already know what to do.
You're just afraid to commit to it.
(10:53):
And trust me, I get it, but the answerisn't in another book, another podcast,
another figuring things out phase.
It's just actually doing the damn thing.
I am a person that loves to do lists.
I create tons of them.
I could create to do lists all day long.
(11:15):
So I totally understand whatit feels like to overthink, but
it's really just protecting you.
To keep you in your familiar hell.
We talked about this on the lastpodcast episode around staying in
a familiar hell because it's morecomfortable than an unfamiliar heaven.
(11:37):
And part of that conditioningis giving ourselves little
jobs to do like overthinking.
And it's like, you know, when I have a bigproject, my house has never been cleaner.
Why?
Because I'm avoiding the big projectand I'm thinking of all the other things
that I could be doing, like cleaningmy house, whatever, like keeping myself
(12:01):
in that same environment, even thoughI know that the project itself is
going to take me to the next level.
Is this ringing true for you?
And if so, I want you to take one smallaction on doing the thing that you've
been overthinking for months today.
Maybe you don't have the time.
The time in your schedule to do it today.
(12:22):
I want you to at least blockit in your calendar today.
I want you to commit becauseagain, overthinking is just
an excuse to stay safe.
Your financial anxietyis a worthiness issue.
So money stress, what I have learnedwithin myself, within my clients,
(12:48):
it's not just about the money.
It's actually about self worth.
You already have the skills, butyou're not backing yourself the way
that you would if you truly, trulyfelt comfortable in your own power.
I'm actually working on something.
(13:09):
I'm probably going to do a podcastepisode around why there's, we have
women that are afraid of their own power.
And I'm This is part of that, that Ihave been just kind of writing down.
I've been collecting notes andthoughts and things like that.
It very well could be that youare scared of your own power.
(13:32):
So as your mini call to action,I want you to look at your
finances today without fear.
Check your bank account.
I want you to.
Put on the hat and say, like,I am investing in my future.
I am going to be my own portfolio manager.
(13:53):
So look at your financesand bring awareness because
that actually means power.
That's bringing you into your powerand it's a gentle way to where you're
not having to be so scared of the bigGreatness of your power and you can do
something very small to just start tokind of get comfortable in your own power
(14:18):
Okay And the last thing is thatthe future you is built with
the actions that you take today.
There's been a theme here thathas been all around taking.
Taking action and is really like kindof the point of all of it, right?
(14:38):
Every day that you spend avoidingoverthinking or making excuses is
a day that you're reinforcing yourcurrent reality, your familiar hell.
You're not stuck because of yourdivorce, because of what happened.
You're stuck because youhaven't decided to move yet.
(14:59):
To put in the reps, to lay thefoundation, the very important
foundation, or maybe you've taken somesteps and it was either too scary.
You didn't get theresults that you wanted.
It didn't turn out theway that you expected.
And so you regressed, you backtracked,you said, maybe this isn't for me.
(15:19):
That is all normal, first ofall, but that is also you.
Your subconscious trying to keep yousafe and even though it's not necessarily
safe in the long run, it's trying to keepyou familiar because that's what's safe.
(15:41):
And so your body is like, wait a second.
No, we're going into uncharted territory.
So as your final call to action,if you are being called to take
action, if you know that you're safe.
That you need to do something.
You're itching for a change.
(16:01):
What's the first actionfuture you would take today?
Now go and do it.
Okay, so let's wrap this up.
If you made it to this point,it means that you're ready.
And that's why I createdyour greatest comeback.
This isn't just about healing.
It's about taking action to buildyour dream life after divorce.
(16:23):
If you're feeling fired up,And you're ready to move.
You're ready to not waste anymore time taking the wrong steps,
making plans that you don't evenknow are going to work or not.
This is for you.
The way list is officially open andyou'll get first dibs on the lowest
price that this is ever going to be plusexclusive bonuses and be in the first
(16:47):
round of women making their comeback.
So if this episode hit home, Besure to go get on the list, the
links in the show notes, and youcan always DM me the word comeback.
I'll also send you the details there.
I can answer any of yourquestions, but this is your moment.
Your comeback era is waiting.
Let's go.