September 8, 2025 • 43 mins
In this episode of Redesigning Life, keynote speaker and author Judi Holler discusses her new book "Holler at Your Dreams" and her journey from a corporate career to authentic self-expression. Judi gets real about her transformation from being a "Corporate Barbie" in hotel sales and marketing to discovering improv comedy in Chicago, which led her to building a seven-figure speaking business.
The conversation dives deep into what Judi calls "self-expressionism," which means using your soul and intuition as your primary brain. Her philosophy centers on knowing what truly lights us up so we can live authentically, rather than getting lost in the constant noise of social media and external expectations. We explore the danger of constant scrolling and how it disconnects us from our inner voice, emphasizing the need to "stop the scroll and tap into soul."
Judi gets vulnerable about the challenges that come with growth, including outgrowing friendships and dealing with what she calls "money grabbers" who prey on your insecurities. We dive into that uncomfortable "liminal space" between who we were and who we're becoming, and the danger of outsourcing our opinions to others who may not understand our vision.
This one's for you if you know you're ready for something different but can't quite figure out what that looks like, if you're struggling with people-pleasing, navigating evolving friendships, or wanting to reconnect with what genuinely inspires you.
Judi's book "Holler at Your Dreams" is available September 9th!
Connect with Judi Holler:
https://judiholler.com/
Judi Holler on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/judiholler/
Judi's Book, Holler at Your Dreams:
https://www.amazon.com/Holler-Your-Dreams-Dangerously-Inspiring/dp/1734825081/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0
Connect with Sabrina:
https://www.instagram.com/Sabrina_Soto/
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Redesigning Life.
I'm your host, sabrina Soto,and this is the space where we
have honest conversations aboutpersonal growth, mindset shifts
and creating a life that feelstruly aligned.
In each episode, I'll talk toexperts in their fields who
share their insights to help youstep into your higher self.
Let's redesign your life fromthe inside out.
Welcome to another episode ofRedesigning Life.
(00:26):
This week, a friend of mine, anew friend of mine, judy Holler,
is on.
Judy, thank you so much forjoining us today.
I want to discuss your book.
We have, like I have a wholelist of things I want to talk to
you about.
I'm so excited.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
I mean, I feel like holla, we got to start off with
just a good old holla.
It's so good to be here, mygirl, and yeah, let's dig into
it.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
There's a lot to talk about.
There's a lot to talk about.
So Judy and I met at an eventfor another author's book that
was coming out and we just hitit off.
You'll understand why once youlisten to this podcast.
But she has a new book calledHoller at your Dreams.
Her name is Judy Holler.
Lots of discussions about howto manifest the life that you
(01:12):
want and how to kind of get outof your own way.
In a sense, and because I haveso many things I want to talk to
you about, like so many goodnuggets in this book, can you
kind of give a little backgroundto my listeners of who the heck
you are?
Speaker 2 (01:24):
So, yes, my last name is Holler.
I was born a verb and I reallybelieve it's now kind of
poetically and purposely on.
Purposely is that a word?
We're making it a word like thedivine assignment, right?
So I and I think we should puta pin in that, because I only
(01:47):
woke up this last name I wasliterally born with at like
three years ago, at the age of47.
So I'm I just turned 49.
So it was like 46 and a half,47 that I woke it up.
You know I had been verycorporate Barbie most of my
career.
So I am a pro speaker, I'm akeynote speaker and I before
(02:08):
that was in in corporate Right.
So I built this big career insales and marketing and hotel in
the hotel business, hotel salesand marketing.
So I worked for big companieslike Omni, marriott, starwood at
the time when there was aStarwood and I was, you know,
opening hotels, workingregionally, sales and marketing,
hospitality, tourism, meetings,events.
That was my world.
(02:28):
And I moved to Chicago for apromotion.
And when I moved to Chicago atthe age of 30, I knew no one
there.
I had like one friend and Iknew my life couldn't just be
work and so I was looking forthings to do outside of work and
I had always wanted to tryimprov, like I'd always heard of
Second City, okay, which is abig, very famous improv theater
(02:51):
in the city of Chicago.
It's kind of like themothership.
So Saturday Night Live, likeplucking talent right out of
Second City, right, but I'm 30.
I'm like a granny for, like,I'm like a granny for the world
of improv, right, all these kidsin their 20s trying to get like
discovered.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
But I was like you know You're a geriatric comedian
.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Yes, literally I was like, okay, but what do I have
to lose?
I have no friends here andmaybe I'll meet a cute boy,
although you never really wantto date a comedian Nothing, no
disrespect to comedians.
But that wasn't working out.
But I was like, let's go makefriends, let that itch and just
try it Right.
And so I signed up for improvand I was like sort of doing
(03:28):
that on nights and weekends, butby day in corporate, and this
is like who?
When you ask me who Judy Holleris, this is like the flashpoint
, because, yes, I had had, likeyou know, I went to school for
radio television.
I, you know, wanted to be.
Honestly, I wanted to be an MTVVJ.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
If you do, you know, girl, I know you probably did
too um, I actually like slept onthe floor with my mother on
vine to audition for who want tobe a bj.
Yes, I, we in Hollywood, inChicago.
Oh, I did it in Hollywood, mymom, actually we slept in a tent
, oh my god camped out all dayin the rain girl it was raining
(04:01):
here too same we are sayingswear, it's like your sister
from another mistress.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
So, yes, I you went the television route, I went the
hospitality route, improv route, and found myself like on the
way to the stage, in just adifferent direction Of course, a
different divine assignment,but, yeah, like.
So you know I'd had aperformance, like background,
but you know I had never reallydone anything with it.
I was born and raised in StLouis.
(04:26):
There just weren'topportunities.
I get to Chicago, I start doingimprov, I've got this corporate
career and I'm like yo, thisstuff in the improv theater is
changing my life.
Like what if I just startedlike leading our sales meetings?
So I would like beg my boss tolike let me lead the sales
meeting and I would and get somepractice and I teach the stuff
I was learning in improv, andthen I'd go to our association
events and I'd run all thesefree little workshops.
(04:47):
Just, I was going to themeetings anyway.
So I'm like, let me speak atthem, right, for free.
And all of a sudden I'd havethese like lines of people after
my talks and people would comeup and go.
Here's my card.
You got to come to my company.
Oh my God, here's my card, yougot to come and before you know
it, before you know it and I saybefore you know it like seven
years later I had a speakingbusiness, like a corporate
speaking business, and in 2016,I left my full-time career to do
(05:11):
this full-time.
So who is Judy Holler?
You know, I'm certainly a prospeaker, I'm an artist, I'm a
poet, I'm a writer, but I'm aself-expressionist most
(05:46):
importantly, and I use the artsthings like poetry, things like
pop art and graffiti, thingslike the improv theater, just to
it started in corporate,corporate, but also a really
deep curiosity for, like lifeand things outside of work,
right, that made me cool andcreative and more innovative in
work, right, right, yeah, so Ithink that's that's, that's the
flashpoint, that's thedifferentiator.
It's like I always was like,yes, I had this big corporate
(06:06):
career, because it's not aboutlike quitting your job.
It's about like not quitting onyourself, like, so, whatever it
is that you're doing, do youhave shit on the outside that is
inspiring you on the inside?
And for me, whether it wasimprov or chasing the MTV, want
to be a VJ or, you know,painting on buildings or writing
poetry or playing with color,like I was always just looking
(06:28):
for ways to sort of stay awakeso that I could do more cool,
creative work in whatever it isthat I was doing.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Yeah.
So you started in corporate andthen completely reinvented
yourself to be a keynote speaker, which has led you to who you
are today.
And now this new book Holler atyour Dreams.
So in the book you describecreating self-expressionism as a
way to come home to yourself,and can you share how maybe
people who are listening now canpractice that, because you're
talking about how you don'tnecessarily have to quit
(06:57):
everything and then start fresh,because I mean, and some people
do that and they are successful, but that's scary to a lot of
people, especially people whohave children, people who have,
you know, a lot of bills.
So can you kind of share howyou define it and how people can
begin doing that themselves?
Speaker 2 (07:24):
me tell you the quote like the trashiest of all trash
advice out there on the planetis the whole just jump and the
net will catch you, Right Like.
It's like actually actuallymight not be a bad idea to have
like a little bit of a plan here, Right Like.
And so when I was leavingcorporate to sort of do this,
you know I had certainly, youknow, built a bit of a net for
myself and took the time to dothat and, you know, saved money
(07:45):
and used my nights and weekendsand all my vacation days.
So, yeah, I mean, this is areinvention, is a process, and I
think the art ofself-expressionism and
self-expressionism itself issort of this like, like
long-term look at and approachfor the lifelong quest and
pursuit of growth and change andreinvention, because anytime
(08:05):
you go somewhere new you'regoing to have no clue what
you're doing.
So, you're going to have torelearn self and figure it all
out again.
So I really defineself-expressionism and someone
who lives as aself-expressionist, which I
completely identify as I thinkmy epitaph on my gravestone like
here's what I wanted to say.
I wanted to say here lies thefounder of self-expressionism.
(08:28):
Like that would just be likeand also she was a really dope
human and like a really coolstepmom and all these things, of
course, but like I lovecreating this like new thing in
the world, and what I believeand know it to be is someone, a
person who uses like soul andintuition as primary brain.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Yeah, yes, but it's hard.
You talk about this in the booktoo, about not being able to
listen because you're scrolling.
It's the silence.
You can't hear the silencebecause you're scrolling.
I think that now we are socalled to do so many things that
it's like you don't get thecorporate mask.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
You like get who they are in their bones, because we
love to be out in the wild andwe're like so what do you do and
where are you from and what doyou have going on?
All this, all the others, allthis like small talk that is
like right, like it just keepsyou small.
What if we were to shift intomore big stuff, right, and
really find out who someone is?
And so, before I give you thequestion, I think I need you to
(09:54):
understand where it's comingfrom, because this was a major
flashpoint and the first thing Iteach in the art of
self-expressionism and it ispoint of view and perspective
and you got to have one.
And it is point of view andperspective and you got to have
one Because if you don't, it'sgoing to make your work vanilla
and like everything else and notas innovative and or creative
as it could be.
(10:14):
So I was.
We were moving from the Midwestto the desert.
This was about four years agoand we were looking at places to
live and my husband's a hugegolfer we live in Arizona, so he
you know we were trying to findlike we had to live by a
certain golf course, golfcommunity, right, so that he
could get to, you know, his teetimes and all this stuff.
So we're like touring thesefacilities and so I'm tagging
along and I'm loving, I'm likeon these golf court cards, it's
(10:35):
like March in Arizona, it'smagical, right.
And so, scott, there's like thetwo, the golf caddy guy, the
manager, me and my husband andthey leave me with this caddy
kid who was probably 26.
His name was Jason and he goesout, you know, my husband goes
out to look at the greens andit's just me and this young
26-year-old sitting in the cartand he leans back and he makes
small talk, as we do, and hesays so you know what do you do?
(10:57):
And I'm like, okay, here we go.
I'm an oh, cool, cool man.
What do you write about, youknow?
And I'm like, oh, I have a bookcalled Fear is my First Book,
fear is my Homeboy and I, youknow, use improv and the arts to
help people reframe fear andface fear and all this stuff.
He's like, oh, he's like that'sso awesome.
He goes.
You got to tell me what inspiresyou, sabrina, sabrina, and I
(11:22):
kid you not.
Okay, of course I had thingsthat inspired me, but I panicked
, I was like I could not answerhim.
I was like so caught off guardby the coolness number one of
that question and number two,like was panicking at the fact
that I could not answer this manLike here.
I am an artist, a writer, anauthor, a creative like he was
like hanging on to every word.
(11:43):
He thought I was so cool.
And you know how, when you'retalking to people and you see
their eyes glaze over and youknow you're losing them, I start
grasping for stuff.
Sabrina, I'm like, oh, theBrene Brown Things that were
just so big no disrespect, butnothing like that was from soul
source.
I have a zillion things thatinspire me the boombox graffiti,
(12:06):
gilda Radner, cactuses thatbloom in the desert, hot pink
chartreuse Are you kidding me?
Spray paint.
I have like a thousand thingsthat inspire me, but I could not
like land the plane and I vowedI got out of that golf cart.
I was like shook by this dude'squestion.
I was like yo, never again,no-transcript, and where I'm
(12:53):
going.
So my answer to your questionis, if I were to ask you what
inspires you, I'm not lookingfor your mission statement, I'm
not looking for your core values.
I'm not looking for somebullshit corporate response.
I'm looking for, like thepeople, places and things that
light you up now, that aremaking you who you are.
(13:13):
Like what inspires Sabrina Soto?
Like what is she down with?
Like, what is she reading?
What is like?
What's her color?
Like, what's the patterns?
Like, where does she go on theweekends?
Like, what is she?
Does she drink green juice?
Does she?
Does she like yellow?
Does she drive a small car?
Oh wait, where's she traveledlately?
Like, oh, maybe that's infusingthe way she decorates and the
(13:33):
way she communicates and the wayshe is as a human today.
Right and so I think one of thefirst things someone could do is
, number one go be inspired bythings.
Like go get inspired in yourlife.
You want to write a cool bookand give a good speech, go do
cool stuff and tell me all aboutit.
And number two, like know whatinspires you and be able to
(13:54):
quickly and clearly articulatethat and to have a few people,
places and things that sort ofbecome the heartbeat for who you
are as a human right, becauseall of that outside stuff is
going to make you a better,whatever it is that you do for a
living and for money.
Does that make sense?
Absolutely so.
I think that's point of view,that's perspective, and all good
(14:16):
artists have a point of viewand a perspective.
And if you want to be differentthan everyone else, what's
yours.
And if you don't have an answerto the question, it's a great
homework assignment.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
Yeah.
I do think that I mean I knowwhat mine is.
But I think that a lot ofpeople who are listening are
like, yeah, this sounds great,judy, I would love to go and get
inspired and go out and travel.
But it's at least a lot ofpeople that I'm in contact with
and a lot of viewers that arelisteners and viewers of the
show that, like DM me, everybodyjust seems like they are trying
(14:54):
to make ends meet and theycan't.
They want to be inspired, theywant to find their passion, they
want to find their purpose, yetthey find it really.
They feel stuck and exhaustedfrom just the status quo.
For me, like what inspires me isconnecting, and I find it very
invigorating and like energygoes through my entire body when
(15:16):
I connect with people, not theBS weather talk I can't stand
small talk.
It's like, yes, I know what theweather is, I'm in it with you,
like we don't have to talkabout it.
But when I can really connectwith somebody and meet them in
their eyes and talk about stuffthat is deep and when I can
inspire people to live a betterlife and not make it difficult.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Yeah, any more difficult than it already, is
right, and I think-.
I don't think life has to bedifficult you know, it doesn't
have to be Agreed.
And what you just said.
Even connection, like that's abeautiful thing to know about
yourself, because then you'relike, oh, you're probably out of
alignment and things areshowing up for you that don't
feel good when you're notgetting the connection that your
soul needs right.
(15:59):
And guess what?
Connection doesn't cost money,it doesn't cost a dime.
I think excuses can be a verydangerous thing.
I hear it a lot too in theconversations I have with the
readers of my work.
You know that whether it's timeor money or resources, or you
know their own limiting beliefs,I think excuses can be a very
(16:22):
dangerous place for fear to live, because I think there's.
You know, I don't know, I don'tknow if we're ever really stuck
.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
Yeah, no, you know, I think we can.
It's easy for you to feel likeit when you look at your
schedule.
But, yeah, you know, it isfinding those micro moments, the
micro moments through the dayto just be quiet and there is so
much opportunity to scroll.
So, you know, that's why I lovethat you even touched on that
(16:52):
in the book of you know, findingthat you're so stuck in the
scroll you said that you can'thear your soul.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
Right, and those are choices, those are micro moment
choices, Right.
And so I think you look atanybody you know, I don't know,
I just kind of have flipped thescript.
You know, one of the ways Iknow I'm out of alignment I've
done a ton of work on so muchself-discovery oh my God Talk to
me about that, oh my gosh.
The journey of self-discoverythat I've been on over the last
four years has been reallypowerful.
(17:21):
I've played with so many thingspersonally, professionally,
spiritually, tell me what yourfavorite modalities that have
worked for you.
Okay, this is where I'm about togo.
I mean, it changed.
It's one of the things I it's apart of the art of
self-expressionism, which is oneof our L's, because HALA HALER
stands for one.
(17:41):
Each letter kind of, is a in mykeynotes is a piece of the
framework that I teach.
And the second L is leverageyour design.
For me, it's human design allday long.
I don't know if you've done anyhuman design work.
Speaker 1 (17:53):
I haven't, but I'm actually going to meet somebody
next week who's really into it,because I've never done it.
My God, I think I'm a generator.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
Oh, yeah, cool, Okay, so you know you are.
Yeah, okay, that's great,that's good, that makes sense.
70% of the world are generators, manifesting generators or
manifestors.
Right, 20% of the world areprojectors.
I'm a projector and when Ifound out I was a projector, I
was pissed.
I was like run it again, run itagain.
(18:22):
You put in the time wrong, runit again, baby, I am a
manifesting generator, I know it.
But see, now I understood whythings started breaking for me,
because I'm trying to besomething like against my design
and human design, if I couldlike sum it up, and, like you
know, I'm in school, like I am astudent of the work.
Right now.
I'm actually building a souldiving practice.
I want to become a practitionerhere, like I love it so much,
(18:45):
sabrina, that I am like in thelab on it and studying it.
But I think it's this reallybeautiful.
Like it is basically a soul mapof how prosperous you can
become when your full potentialis tapped into and turned on.
And what it is is a snapshot ofyou at birth.
(19:05):
But what it doesn't and all thepotential that exists in you
like you from the minute, seconddate, time you were born but
what it doesn't take intoconsideration is all the human
conditioning that gets in theway right.
That jumps into our life.
So we've got all this stuff.
So it's like it's the potentialof you when the hallways of
(19:26):
your house are cleaned up.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Right, it's like for people who are listening.
You're like what the heck areyou guys talking?
Speaker 2 (19:31):
about.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Yeah, it's like astrology Meets.
Speaker 2 (19:35):
Meets the I Ching meets, quantum physics Meets,
gene Keys meets.
So it's like science.
It's like because astrology isfun, but I've never really I
like I love all that stuff, youknow, but this was something for
me that felt for the first timelike the quantum physics of it
(19:56):
really hooked me and the scienceof that and some it was
undeniable.
Wait, okay.
Speaker 1 (20:06):
So if anybody's listening and you're like, okay,
so if you have chat GPT whicheverybody I bet you do just plug
in your birth date, where youwere born and the time and it'll
tell you your what is it called.
You just said it.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Your human design profile is right, so it's your-.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
Yes, and then you could read up on it, so you
don't have to pay anything.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
You could just at least know it's free, you can,
you can get the snapshot forfree and then you know there are
so many beautiful people youcan work with to go deeper into
it.
But the reason I brought it upis like I know I'm out of
alignment, like bitterness, likeso when you talk about journey
of self-discovery and like tellme about that.
So human design kind of cameinto play and I started really
(20:50):
reading and studying myself andlearning more about, like all
this potential and maybe whereshadow sides were coming up and
just things that weren't healedand oh my gosh and oh my gosh,
and just environments that workfor me, environments that don't
work for me.
And one of the things humandesign teaches you is it'll show
you how it'll give you twowords so how you know when
you're in alignment, when thingsare working, this is how you're
going to feel, and when thingsare not working, you know this
(21:11):
is when this is coming up.
You know you are out ofalignment and you can either
awareness, shut it down and callit back or keep going down that
rabbit hole and push everythingaway from you.
But I went through it.
Mine is bitterness, and so Iwent through a phase, Sabrina
and this is so, not holler but Iwas like super bitter, like I
was that girl that was like easy, oh, must be nice, easy, how
(21:41):
long ago was this?
I'll feel it and I'm like, oh,now I know it, now I know, and
I'm like no, no, no, no, no, no,I call it back and I get myself
, I can get myself to feelinggood about things faster, right,
whereas before I would ruminateand then I was wondering why
things weren't working oropportunities weren't coming or
doors were closing or I was, youknow, breaking out or not
(22:02):
sleeping, or just all thesethings weren't.
I was so out of alignment, likejust like it felt like my
business and my life and mybrain was just like like I was
broken, you know, because I waslike sort of fighting who I came
here to be.
And once I found out I was aprojector, I was like, oh, we
are 20% of the planet, like weare not your typical.
(22:26):
We are typical.
We do not generate our ownenergy.
So I'm sitting here trying to bea generator in a projector body
, wondering why things aren'tworking, like I'm here to sort
of be more receptive and to Ican't even every time the words
come out of my mouth it feelsuncomfortable, but like I'm here
to actually because and you'regonna listen to this and roll
(22:46):
your eyes because I did too butI'm actually here to like do
less and like surrender and letgo and all this stuff.
But I was like well, how do Ipay my mortgage, like?
How do I like I got bills topay, I got a team, I got a book
to launch.
How do you sit back and likesurrender when you got shit to
do?
Right, you know I have peoplethat depend on me, and so I had
(23:06):
to like figure out what thatlooked like for me, and human
design was one of the manymodalities.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
For me it's like one out of my mom says how do you
know what works?
You do so many things.
I'm like I don't care, I don'tcare.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Give me all of them.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
As long as.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
I'm happy, like the rap work.
Yeah, all of it, you talk aboutleveling up.
Speaker 1 (23:25):
You describe those seasons where things that once
maybe felt good at some point inyour life suddenly don't feel
like you were just talking aboutin alignment or just don't feel
good, and that's consideredleveling up.
How can you reframe thoseuncomfortable parts?
Because I think, especially atleast at my age going, you know,
I'm in my late 40s, the thingsthat I used to find fun I don't
(23:48):
find fun anymore.
And then I'm like, well, who amI now?
I'm sort of in this in-betweentime and you say that that's
that uncomfortable.
Leveling up is growth.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
So, yeah, that liminal space, what you're
talking about is the liminalright.
You're kind of in betweennowhere and not yet.
You're not like yet finished onyour journey, but you're no
longer in your 20s, right.
So you're in this, like youknow, same, like I'm 49, you
know, and I feel it on a soullevel.
But I think that's also awesome, like one of the things that I
think I get really excited about.
(24:20):
I think we get I don't know,I'm really I love endings, I
love change.
I love that because it meanssomething new is about to drop
in.
And so, you know, as I'veleveled up and had a lot of
endings that were a part of thatleveling up whether they were
(24:40):
business relationships or sortof even companies, stages, rooms
that built me no longer feellike the right rooms for me,
friendships that now you knowyou go through, friendships that
used to feel like home now havetension, right.
This is like why you'll stand inyour closet and you'll have all
(25:01):
these beautiful clothes andyou're like I have nothing to
wear.
I have nothing to wear and I'mlike, oh well, maybe it's not
yours anymore.
Yeah, like, maybe maybe it'sjust not for you anymore.
And I think this is the pursuitof self-expressionism and
self-expression itself.
It's like how do we go figureout how to, to figure out what
(25:23):
is for us right?
And we'll never do that ifwe're not brave enough to like
surrender to the ending and letgo a little bit so we can let
new stuff come in from theoutside.
I think so many times we holdon to things but if something
isn't for you anymore, it willlike period, it will not stay
with you and you will not wannastay with it.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
Or it will stay with you, but it'll drag you down.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
Or it'll stay with you but it'll drag you down, or
it'll stay with you and you willbe miserable and sick and
irritable and stressed out andsnapping at everybody and stuck
You'll feel stuck.
You'll feel like you're in arut Again.
You'll stand in your closet andbe like I have nothing.
Well, maybe that isn't for youanymore.
And so this is where a lot ofthis stuff kind of all works
together in the art ofself-expressionism, because, you
know, point of view andperspective and courting your
creativity and experimentingwith your fear and building all
(26:13):
the courage it takes to do stufflike this is a big part of the
process, because it is not forthe faint of heart, it is not
easy, but I think endings arethe price we pay for the joy and
the beauty and the abundance ofa new beginning, and so I sort
of welcome an ending.
And you know, certainly you knowwe're going to lose people we
love, and I'm not necessarilytalking about death.
I think we're all going to movethrough tragedy.
(26:34):
We've, all you know, lostpeople we love and we will
continue to, and so I think youneed to take your time to move
through that.
I'm not saying it's an ending,move on.
I think death holds its owncategory, right.
That's a loss that takes a soul, however much time it needs to
move through that.
But I'm talking about endingsin business and business
(26:55):
relationships and liferelationships and partnerships
and friendships and just withlook and feel and clutter and
just letting things go in yourlife.
It's just a beautiful way toreset the playing field and
honor where you've been but alsoget excited about where you're
going, and so that's kind of howI flipped the script and it
(27:15):
helps me get through thatliminal space a little bit
faster, right, because I meandefinitely, you know, one of the
things I'm feeling happen a lotright now are friendships that
used to feel like home.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
Can we talk about this a little bit?
We need to talk about this,okay, because a lot of my my
friends, new friends, aretalking about this and again, I
don't know if it's a 40s thing,but it's like almost this new
awakening that, oh, my friends,you know, from 20 years ago or
even 10, it doesn't, it doesn'talign anymore and it's not a bad
(27:48):
thing, it's just a movement,and I think a lot of you know I
was talking to my friend theother day.
She has nothing in common witha friend of hers that lives
nearby her and she feels veryguilty not wanting to hang out
with this person and Icompletely understand that.
But I think that there's noshame in moving, you know, away.
(28:08):
It doesn't mean you have toghost someone, right?
You know you don't have to dothat, but it's okay and I think
you know you can't expect tohave the same things in common
with everybody for 20, 30, evensometimes 10 years.
Speaker 2 (28:23):
It's crazy and I have such like, I'm such a loyal
person, right, and I like in myride or dies, or my ride or dies
, but there's still frictionthere, especially as I keep
becoming and keep becoming andkeep becoming and keep becoming,
and as it gets edgier andwilder and more holler and all
these like things that live inmy head that I wanted to bring
(28:43):
to life for years.
And you know my people know me,but I think it also scares them
because will you still be mybooty, right?
Like if you change, and it alsois like if you change too much.
It also holds up a mirror tothe change someone's not willing
to make in themselves, right,and so there's.
It is a really.
I think it's one of the toughestdances.
That's why the self-discoveryis so important and the caring
(29:06):
of self and all the stuff we do,whether we put ourselves in a
sauna or a cold plunge, or thebreath work or the human design,
or you just sit outside andstare at the stars.
You got to have somethingoutside of your work, like
that's what this is really allabout.
It's about having somethingoutside of what you do every day
, whether you're working incorporate, working for yourself
or raising a family, whatever itis that your work is.
(29:27):
You have to have something foryou, you, you, you like, like
it's.
And that work I do on myself,that self-discovery, that
obsession with it, gives megrace and pressure under fire,
but certainly the patience to beable to say this has nothing to
do with me, right, and I wouldask everybody for their opinions
(29:48):
.
Like my best friends, peoplewho, like, have never built a
business, people who literallyhave never.
They have no dreams.
They ask the places I'm goingin my head like their worlds.
(30:09):
Couldn't even imagine thekingdoms I've built inside the
Hall of Earth, right, but I'mbanking my future on an opinion
of someone I went to collegewith and used to like drink,
Captain and Cokes and smokecigarettes with.
I love you, but like you'venever built a business.
And what am I doing?
Right, but I was so addicted tothe approval of these women.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
I got you.
I totally understand.
Speaker 2 (30:30):
That I love myself.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
It took me a long time to figure that out, you
know, long time.
I used to completely be thesame, and sometimes now, when I
hear people having an opinion onwhatever subject, let's just
say you know, it's my fashion,whatever.
And then I'll look at them andbe like do I like their style?
It's like no.
So then why am I like?
(30:51):
Why do I care?
Speaker 2 (30:52):
Yeah, right, when I want your life like I love you
and I love your life, the lifeyou've built for yourself, but I
wouldn't want that life.
So I've also been like, okay,be very careful.
I read about this in the booktoo.
Like to your point be verycareful.
Like there is somethingpowerful about having a network
and people that can affirm you,affirm you and give you that
(31:14):
like, ooh, like creative nudgethat you're moving in the right
direction.
But they're also like with you,they're on the field, they're
in our, they're in alignmentwith where you're at.
Like I think that's verydifferent than like asking
opinions, like, do you like this?
Do you like this?
Do you like this?
Because then you'll.
Just it's like wait, no, do Ilike this?
And I think that's become mynew compass, because it's very
dangerous to outsource opinionsand give away power to all of
(31:36):
these people outside of you,right, when 99% of the time, you
know you know the answer.
And I'm kind of like in thisera now of like, okay, wait,
that's great.
Like every time I post on socialI just said it today, before we
got on the air I was like I go,even me posting this.
I'm like, say, I'm talking tomy Instagram right now.
I'm like, okay, me posting thisto you right now.
I'm like, okay, me posting thisto you right now.
(31:57):
I love you follower, fan friend, I go, I don't really care if
you like this or not, I likethis and I love this book.
Because I'm out promoting mybook right and I'm like, and
this matters, and if I don'tspeak up or say anything, so if
I'm sitting on my social likeworrying about all my friends
from college and high schoolbeing like annoyed about how
much I'm talking about my book,like I'm doing myself such a
disservice right, I know and itjust steals it from all the
(32:17):
people that could use it, andit's also like it's just so
dangerous.
So I'm like no, I like this.
I like this content.
I like the shirt I'm wearing.
I like the bubble braid today.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
I'm going to get on.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
I'm going to pop off today.
I'm going to talk about this.
I'm going to talk still inpractice on this stuff.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
It doesn't get any easier.
You just get braver andstronger.
You do get stronger.
It's micro.
Can you talk about your Barnesand Noble moment that you talked
about in the book?
Speaker 2 (32:48):
Oh, my God, when I went and drove myself in my like
dark night of the soul and Idrove myself to Barnes and Noble
, yeah, the way I opened thebook.
Okay yeah.
So I was like in a spiral againbitterness, bitterness,
bitterness.
I was in this like spiral of,like self-loathing, right, and I
was 100% blocking all of myblessings, like I was just in a
(33:11):
dark headspace, beating myselfup full of self-doubt,
overwhelmed, confused about what, and, honestly, it was all
because I was had my head on aswivel.
I was just looking around atwhat everybody else was doing
and there's this thing thathappens, sabrina, when you get
to a certain level.
I don't know if you'veexperienced this yet, but I call
(33:32):
them the money grabbers.
The money grabbers start comingaround.
So once you get a certain level, so this happens in the
speaking business okay, moneygrabbers start coming around.
So once you get a certain level, so this happens in the
speaking business okay, moneygrabbers start coming around.
So you get to a certain leveland you're like okay, you know,
I'm like, you know, this is backin 2019.
My first book came out in 2020.
Like I'm, I'm popping off,right, I'm speaking on all these
stages and I'm starting to gethot, right and all this stuff.
You know my speaking businessscale seven figures, all this
(33:53):
People are talking about me andall of a sudden, money grabbers
come around and the phone startsringing with agents, managers,
people branding, courses, click,scale, go, boom.
This is what.
If you holler, you know we needto get on a call.
If you really want to get tothis level, you got to do this.
And this is what they're doing.
This is what they're doing.
You need this, you need thiscourse, you need that.
And then all of a sudden you'relike, oh, and you're like, I
(34:14):
guess I do.
I wanna get to the next level.
I wanna be yeah, I wanna be onthe big stage.
So sure, take my money.
So I'm like writing all ofthese checks to people, right,
and you know, just all thesepeople were getting rich off my
insecurities.
But I'm going soul bankrupt,right, because I'm like lost and
confused and listening to allof these people outside of me,
(34:41):
and so I lost source and compassand knew that I wanted to
create a movement around my lastname but was being told that it
would never work.
So I, in the middle of theconfusion, go to Barnes Noble
and I love a Barnes Noble, Ilove the way it smells.
I love all the notebooks, I loveall the pens.
I love all the gifts, right, Ijust love the poetry section.
(35:05):
I just like all the books there, right?
The music, ooh, the books onart, you know, it just is great.
The kids section have you everjust hung out even like the
teens section?
Speaker 1 (35:15):
I have a nine-year-old.
Speaker 2 (35:16):
Oh yeah.
So you know, I mean, like Ilove it, I go to the kids
section, like you might low key,every now and then.
If you're ever in Arizona theShea and the 101, you would see
me sitting on those littlechairs.
I do it, why not?
It's just like it's such a fun.
It's something I'll do oncreativity dates every now and
then and I just kind of get intothe.
I'm like, yeah, like I buynotebooks, I buy pens, I buy a
(35:39):
bunch of poetry books, I buy abunch of children's books in
verse, like kids books in verse,and and just it was like and I
just made a decision right thenand there scratches not a
computer where I can deletethings.
(36:00):
I'm going to scribble, scratchand just start writing again,
because I had always lovedpoetry.
It's something I'd kind of keptsecret for many years because I
didn't even think it would bepossible to do motivational
poetry or write some bars.
I'm like this is crazy, likewho do?
I think I am and I just I kindof kept it hidden and I just
started writing again andpulling out the old notebooks
(36:21):
and sort of that self-expression, that choice to self-express,
to pick up the pens and thenotebooks and to sit in the kids
section and to peruse thepoetry and to just smell the
Barnes and Noble and to just sitdown and write those first five
words.
And in that first poem Irewrote again after years.
That choice to self-expresssaved me.
(36:41):
I really believe it did.
I've seen plenty of shamans,I've done all the self-discovery
, I've taken all the courses,all the coaches, and it's all
beautiful and great, but myself-expression saved me and I
think it continues to, becauseit reminds me of me.
Because it reminds me of me.
It's just me hanging with meand it just, you know, it was
just a powerful sort of cosmicday for me and I just felt very
(37:06):
and my best friend also, I thinkwhat got me to the Barnes Noble
.
And here's the thing I did nottell you and I don't even know
if I alluded to this in the book, but my best friend, jodi, had
said to me just moments beforethat Barnes Noble trip.
She said you know, jodi, andshe kept hearing me flail, flail
, flail.
I was just so lost, all overthe place, beat myself up, beat
(37:28):
myself up, beat myself up.
And she's like you know what,jodi, you keep talking about all
this poetry, you keep talkingabout it, you keep talking about
it.
She goes you know what, and shewas one who told me about these
children's books.
She's two small boys, an eightand a 10-year-old.
She goes there's these booksthat are written in verse.
You should go pick them up.
And she goes you shouldconsider doing your next book in
verse.
And just to hear, it was likeshe dropped it so casually, but
(37:52):
it was almost like it was likeall of a sudden my world went
like this woman outside of methat I deeply love and respect.
That is almost like I don'thave a relationship with my mom.
So my girls, my home girls fromlike the old school, ride or
die.
I put a lot of pressure on them.
God love them because they'relike mamas to me, you know, and
their opinions do mean a lot,which can be dangerous.
(38:14):
And we've cleaned up this messa little bit.
Me and my besties can bedangerous, and we've cleaned up
this mess a little bit, me andmy besties.
But Jodi did see something inme that I hadn't yet saw in
myself, and her saying that andreflecting it to me sort of put
my world in 5D and I said, oh,my God, you know.
So that's what got me to BarnesNoble, like, well, let's go
play around in that section,let's go look up.
And she gave me all these booksthat her kids were reading.
So I went to go find thoseauthors and I just started
(38:38):
playing with it and that's howall this began.
Speaker 1 (38:41):
Yeah, it's funny that I have a very similar situation
that happened with me, and I'mtelling this because it's going
to be different for everyone andI think inspiration can come in
the times that you don't evenexpect it.
My book that I'm working oncame right before I was going to
do a hot yoga class.
The whole idea came to me whileI was just like waiting for the
(39:04):
class to begin and sometimesyou just have to be able to be
silent to listen to those voices.
But also in yourself you havesometimes inspiration.
But to be able to have a circlearound you that you trust, that
wants you to succeed, isimportant.
You don't want to surroundyourself with yes people all the
(39:25):
time because there is no.
It's so much.
I was telling a friend of minehe just came out with a movie.
He brought it over here, letsome people listen to it, asked
for notes.
I told him the truth.
Everybody else just clapped itwas great.
Then, when he left, everybodywas like giving notes and I said
why don't you say it to himwhen he was here?
Because it's very hard forpeople to tell it is.
(39:45):
It's hard.
It's easier for people to saygood job and keep it moving.
Then, hey, can we sit and letme tell you all the things I
think you could do to improvethis, because I want you to
succeed as much as you do.
So be careful.
I say that to say make sure yousurround yourself with a good
circle, like you have, judy,with your best friends, with
people who want you to succeed,because they can be such a
catalyst to your next level.
Speaker 2 (40:09):
A thousand percent Like my book Holler at your
Dreams almost did not existbecause it was retitled by one
of those money grabbers I wastelling you about, because they
were telling me that HollerDreams would never work in
corporate America.
So I rebranded everything and Idid read in my keynote, read in
my website, read in the book,and we were calling it all.
They're like you're going to bethe be the verb girl, the be
(40:31):
the verb girl, and I'm like,okay, that's cute.
But I'm like, oh, I guessthat's what I need to do to be
successful and to get booked incorporate.
And I was afraid I need to paymy mortgage.
I don't want to lose myspeaking business.
I've built this thing for 10years and what have I done?
And so I panicked, changedeverything to be the verb, and
so it was coming time just thisspring.
So this is going to be likepeople that tell you the truth.
Just this spring I had to makea decision on the book cover and
(40:53):
I couldn't do it.
I was like sick, like Icouldn't, I could not, I was
having.
No, I lost like a year's worthof videotape of me on stage
giving the be the verb talk,because it's I can't even look
at myself.
It's like a shell of me rightbecause I'm like.
So again, if something's notyours, if something's not yours.
Speaker 1 (41:08):
Yes, listen to me as a brand manager.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
So when I had to make a decision on the cover, I sent
it out to a trusted group ofadvisors.
Two or which which were my bestfriends?
One is my.
The three people, the threepeople out of 10 that told me
the truth, are my two bestfriends from high school.
They both go cool, judy,they're like what happened to
Holler at your Dreams?
Love you.
But what happened to Holler atyour Dreams?
They're like.
We're so confused and I'm like,okay, okay.
(41:32):
So and then my creativedirector, who is still with me
ride or die to this day.
She literally left me a voicemessage and she goes you're not
going to like this, but that ischeesy as hell, stupid as hell.
You are way cooler than that.
This is not the vibe she goes.
I'd rather just be dangerouslyinspiring ideas for the wildly
dope soul.
What happened to Holler at yourDreams?
(41:53):
So three people out of 10,everybody else was like God,
love them.
They're like you're amazing.
Speaker 1 (42:00):
Oh my God, we're so proud of you.
Speaker 2 (42:01):
I love them for that.
You need to surround yourselfwith people, but coming full
circle to the point of like ifit's not be, the verb was
assigned to me by a brandmanager outside of me.
It was never mine, so it wasnever going to stay with me and
this is why I wasn't sleeping,et cetera.
But it almost did not happenbecause I was so afraid and I
let someone else from theoutside try to paint the canvas
(42:22):
of my life with their brush.
And may we never do that.
May we never do that.
May we never allow anyone elseto paint our lives canvas with
their brush.
Speaker 1 (42:31):
Judy.
Thank you so much for everyonelistening, obviously, on the
show notes.
I'll have how you can get intouch with Judy.
The book is Holler at yourDreams.
It is available September 9th,right, yes, she's out A
pre-order if you're listening tothis before this pre-order and
it's available on Amazon andwhere you get your books.
Speaker 2 (42:49):
You love buying books yeah, Thank you so much, Judy.
Thanks Sabrina.
Welcome to Redesigning Life.
I'm your host, sabrina Soto,and this is the space where we
have honest conversations aboutpersonal growth, mindset shifts
and creating a life that feelstruly aligned.
In each episode, I'll talk toexperts in their fields who
share their insights to help youstep into your higher self.
Let's redesign your life fromthe inside out.
Welcome to another episode ofRedesigning Life.
(00:26):
This week, a friend of mine, anew friend of mine, judy Holler,
is on.
Judy, thank you so much forjoining us today.
I want to discuss your book.
We have, like I have a wholelist of things I want to talk to
you about.
I'm so excited.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
I mean, I feel like holla, we got to start off with
just a good old holla.
It's so good to be here, mygirl, and yeah, let's dig into
it.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
There's a lot to talk about.
There's a lot to talk about.
So Judy and I met at an eventfor another author's book that
was coming out and we just hitit off.
You'll understand why once youlisten to this podcast.
But she has a new book calledHoller at your Dreams.
Her name is Judy Holler.
Lots of discussions about howto manifest the life that you
(01:12):
want and how to kind of get outof your own way.
In a sense, and because I haveso many things I want to talk to
you about, like so many goodnuggets in this book, can you
kind of give a little backgroundto my listeners of who the heck
you are?
Speaker 2 (01:24):
So, yes, my last name is Holler.
I was born a verb and I reallybelieve it's now kind of
poetically and purposely on.
Purposely is that a word?
We're making it a word like thedivine assignment, right?
So I and I think we should puta pin in that, because I only
(01:47):
woke up this last name I wasliterally born with at like
three years ago, at the age of47.
So I'm I just turned 49.
So it was like 46 and a half,47 that I woke it up.
You know I had been verycorporate Barbie most of my
career.
So I am a pro speaker, I'm akeynote speaker and I before
(02:08):
that was in in corporate Right.
So I built this big career insales and marketing and hotel in
the hotel business, hotel salesand marketing.
So I worked for big companieslike Omni, marriott, starwood at
the time when there was aStarwood and I was, you know,
opening hotels, workingregionally, sales and marketing,
hospitality, tourism, meetings,events.
That was my world.
(02:28):
And I moved to Chicago for apromotion.
And when I moved to Chicago atthe age of 30, I knew no one
there.
I had like one friend and Iknew my life couldn't just be
work and so I was looking forthings to do outside of work and
I had always wanted to tryimprov, like I'd always heard of
Second City, okay, which is abig, very famous improv theater
(02:51):
in the city of Chicago.
It's kind of like themothership.
So Saturday Night Live, likeplucking talent right out of
Second City, right, but I'm 30.
I'm like a granny for, like,I'm like a granny for the world
of improv, right, all these kidsin their 20s trying to get like
discovered.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
But I was like you know You're a geriatric comedian
.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Yes, literally I was like, okay, but what do I have
to lose?
I have no friends here andmaybe I'll meet a cute boy,
although you never really wantto date a comedian Nothing, no
disrespect to comedians.
But that wasn't working out.
But I was like, let's go makefriends, let that itch and just
try it Right.
And so I signed up for improvand I was like sort of doing
(03:28):
that on nights and weekends, butby day in corporate, and this
is like who?
When you ask me who Judy Holleris, this is like the flashpoint
, because, yes, I had had, likeyou know, I went to school for
radio television.
I, you know, wanted to be.
Honestly, I wanted to be an MTVVJ.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
If you do, you know, girl, I know you probably did
too um, I actually like slept onthe floor with my mother on
vine to audition for who want tobe a bj.
Yes, I, we in Hollywood, inChicago.
Oh, I did it in Hollywood, mymom, actually we slept in a tent
, oh my god camped out all dayin the rain girl it was raining
(04:01):
here too same we are sayingswear, it's like your sister
from another mistress.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
So, yes, I you went the television route, I went the
hospitality route, improv route, and found myself like on the
way to the stage, in just adifferent direction Of course, a
different divine assignment,but, yeah, like.
So you know I'd had aperformance, like background,
but you know I had never reallydone anything with it.
I was born and raised in StLouis.
(04:26):
There just weren'topportunities.
I get to Chicago, I start doingimprov, I've got this corporate
career and I'm like yo, thisstuff in the improv theater is
changing my life.
Like what if I just startedlike leading our sales meetings?
So I would like beg my boss tolike let me lead the sales
meeting and I would and get somepractice and I teach the stuff
I was learning in improv, andthen I'd go to our association
events and I'd run all thesefree little workshops.
(04:47):
Just, I was going to themeetings anyway.
So I'm like, let me speak atthem, right, for free.
And all of a sudden I'd havethese like lines of people after
my talks and people would comeup and go.
Here's my card.
You got to come to my company.
Oh my God, here's my card, yougot to come and before you know
it, before you know it and I saybefore you know it like seven
years later I had a speakingbusiness, like a corporate
speaking business, and in 2016,I left my full-time career to do
(05:11):
this full-time.
So who is Judy Holler?
You know, I'm certainly a prospeaker, I'm an artist, I'm a
poet, I'm a writer, but I'm aself-expressionist most
(05:46):
importantly, and I use the artsthings like poetry, things like
pop art and graffiti, thingslike the improv theater, just to
it started in corporate,corporate, but also a really
deep curiosity for, like lifeand things outside of work,
right, that made me cool andcreative and more innovative in
work, right, right, yeah, so Ithink that's that's, that's the
flashpoint, that's thedifferentiator.
It's like I always was like,yes, I had this big corporate
(06:06):
career, because it's not aboutlike quitting your job.
It's about like not quitting onyourself, like, so, whatever it
is that you're doing, do youhave shit on the outside that is
inspiring you on the inside?
And for me, whether it wasimprov or chasing the MTV, want
to be a VJ or, you know,painting on buildings or writing
poetry or playing with color,like I was always just looking
(06:28):
for ways to sort of stay awakeso that I could do more cool,
creative work in whatever it isthat I was doing.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Yeah.
So you started in corporate andthen completely reinvented
yourself to be a keynote speaker, which has led you to who you
are today.
And now this new book Holler atyour Dreams.
So in the book you describecreating self-expressionism as a
way to come home to yourself,and can you share how maybe
people who are listening now canpractice that, because you're
talking about how you don'tnecessarily have to quit
(06:57):
everything and then start fresh,because I mean, and some people
do that and they are successful, but that's scary to a lot of
people, especially people whohave children, people who have,
you know, a lot of bills.
So can you kind of share howyou define it and how people can
begin doing that themselves?
Speaker 2 (07:24):
me tell you the quote like the trashiest of all trash
advice out there on the planetis the whole just jump and the
net will catch you, Right Like.
It's like actually actuallymight not be a bad idea to have
like a little bit of a plan here, Right Like.
And so when I was leavingcorporate to sort of do this,
you know I had certainly, youknow, built a bit of a net for
myself and took the time to dothat and, you know, saved money
(07:45):
and used my nights and weekendsand all my vacation days.
So, yeah, I mean, this is areinvention, is a process, and I
think the art ofself-expressionism and
self-expressionism itself issort of this like, like
long-term look at and approachfor the lifelong quest and
pursuit of growth and change andreinvention, because anytime
(08:05):
you go somewhere new you'regoing to have no clue what
you're doing.
So, you're going to have torelearn self and figure it all
out again.
So I really defineself-expressionism and someone
who lives as aself-expressionist, which I
completely identify as I thinkmy epitaph on my gravestone like
here's what I wanted to say.
I wanted to say here lies thefounder of self-expressionism.
(08:28):
Like that would just be likeand also she was a really dope
human and like a really coolstepmom and all these things, of
course, but like I lovecreating this like new thing in
the world, and what I believeand know it to be is someone, a
person who uses like soul andintuition as primary brain.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Yeah, yes, but it's hard.
You talk about this in the booktoo, about not being able to
listen because you're scrolling.
It's the silence.
You can't hear the silencebecause you're scrolling.
I think that now we are socalled to do so many things that
it's like you don't get thecorporate mask.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
You like get who they are in their bones, because we
love to be out in the wild andwe're like so what do you do and
where are you from and what doyou have going on?
All this, all the others, allthis like small talk that is
like right, like it just keepsyou small.
What if we were to shift intomore big stuff, right, and
really find out who someone is?
And so, before I give you thequestion, I think I need you to
(09:54):
understand where it's comingfrom, because this was a major
flashpoint and the first thing Iteach in the art of
self-expressionism and it ispoint of view and perspective
and you got to have one.
And it is point of view andperspective and you got to have
one Because if you don't, it'sgoing to make your work vanilla
and like everything else and notas innovative and or creative
as it could be.
(10:14):
So I was.
We were moving from the Midwestto the desert.
This was about four years agoand we were looking at places to
live and my husband's a hugegolfer we live in Arizona, so he
you know we were trying to findlike we had to live by a
certain golf course, golfcommunity, right, so that he
could get to, you know, his teetimes and all this stuff.
So we're like touring thesefacilities and so I'm tagging
along and I'm loving, I'm likeon these golf court cards, it's
(10:35):
like March in Arizona, it'smagical, right.
And so, scott, there's like thetwo, the golf caddy guy, the
manager, me and my husband andthey leave me with this caddy
kid who was probably 26.
His name was Jason and he goesout, you know, my husband goes
out to look at the greens andit's just me and this young
26-year-old sitting in the cartand he leans back and he makes
small talk, as we do, and hesays so you know what do you do?
(10:57):
And I'm like, okay, here we go.
I'm an oh, cool, cool man.
What do you write about, youknow?
And I'm like, oh, I have a bookcalled Fear is my First Book,
fear is my Homeboy and I, youknow, use improv and the arts to
help people reframe fear andface fear and all this stuff.
He's like, oh, he's like that'sso awesome.
He goes.
You got to tell me what inspiresyou, sabrina, sabrina, and I
(11:22):
kid you not.
Okay, of course I had thingsthat inspired me, but I panicked
, I was like I could not answerhim.
I was like so caught off guardby the coolness number one of
that question and number two,like was panicking at the fact
that I could not answer this manLike here.
I am an artist, a writer, anauthor, a creative like he was
like hanging on to every word.
(11:43):
He thought I was so cool.
And you know how, when you'retalking to people and you see
their eyes glaze over and youknow you're losing them, I start
grasping for stuff.
Sabrina, I'm like, oh, theBrene Brown Things that were
just so big no disrespect, butnothing like that was from soul
source.
I have a zillion things thatinspire me the boombox graffiti,
(12:06):
gilda Radner, cactuses thatbloom in the desert, hot pink
chartreuse Are you kidding me?
Spray paint.
I have like a thousand thingsthat inspire me, but I could not
like land the plane and I vowedI got out of that golf cart.
I was like shook by this dude'squestion.
I was like yo, never again,no-transcript, and where I'm
(12:53):
going.
So my answer to your questionis, if I were to ask you what
inspires you, I'm not lookingfor your mission statement, I'm
not looking for your core values.
I'm not looking for somebullshit corporate response.
I'm looking for, like thepeople, places and things that
light you up now, that aremaking you who you are.
(13:13):
Like what inspires Sabrina Soto?
Like what is she down with?
Like, what is she reading?
What is like?
What's her color?
Like, what's the patterns?
Like, where does she go on theweekends?
Like, what is she?
Does she drink green juice?
Does she?
Does she like yellow?
Does she drive a small car?
Oh wait, where's she traveledlately?
Like, oh, maybe that's infusingthe way she decorates and the
(13:33):
way she communicates and the wayshe is as a human today.
Right and so I think one of thefirst things someone could do is
, number one go be inspired bythings.
Like go get inspired in yourlife.
You want to write a cool bookand give a good speech, go do
cool stuff and tell me all aboutit.
And number two, like know whatinspires you and be able to
(13:54):
quickly and clearly articulatethat and to have a few people,
places and things that sort ofbecome the heartbeat for who you
are as a human right, becauseall of that outside stuff is
going to make you a better,whatever it is that you do for a
living and for money.
Does that make sense?
Absolutely so.
I think that's point of view,that's perspective, and all good
(14:16):
artists have a point of viewand a perspective.
And if you want to be differentthan everyone else, what's
yours.
And if you don't have an answerto the question, it's a great
homework assignment.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
Yeah.
I do think that I mean I knowwhat mine is.
But I think that a lot ofpeople who are listening are
like, yeah, this sounds great,judy, I would love to go and get
inspired and go out and travel.
But it's at least a lot ofpeople that I'm in contact with
and a lot of viewers that arelisteners and viewers of the
show that, like DM me, everybodyjust seems like they are trying
(14:54):
to make ends meet and theycan't.
They want to be inspired, theywant to find their passion, they
want to find their purpose, yetthey find it really.
They feel stuck and exhaustedfrom just the status quo.
For me, like what inspires me isconnecting, and I find it very
invigorating and like energygoes through my entire body when
(15:16):
I connect with people, not theBS weather talk I can't stand
small talk.
It's like, yes, I know what theweather is, I'm in it with you,
like we don't have to talkabout it.
But when I can really connectwith somebody and meet them in
their eyes and talk about stuffthat is deep and when I can
inspire people to live a betterlife and not make it difficult.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Yeah, any more difficult than it already, is
right, and I think-.
I don't think life has to bedifficult you know, it doesn't
have to be Agreed.
And what you just said.
Even connection, like that's abeautiful thing to know about
yourself, because then you'relike, oh, you're probably out of
alignment and things areshowing up for you that don't
feel good when you're notgetting the connection that your
soul needs right.
(15:59):
And guess what?
Connection doesn't cost money,it doesn't cost a dime.
I think excuses can be a verydangerous thing.
I hear it a lot too in theconversations I have with the
readers of my work.
You know that whether it's timeor money or resources, or you
know their own limiting beliefs,I think excuses can be a very
(16:22):
dangerous place for fear to live, because I think there's.
You know, I don't know, I don'tknow if we're ever really stuck
.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
Yeah, no, you know, I think we can.
It's easy for you to feel likeit when you look at your
schedule.
But, yeah, you know, it isfinding those micro moments, the
micro moments through the dayto just be quiet and there is so
much opportunity to scroll.
So, you know, that's why I lovethat you even touched on that
(16:52):
in the book of you know, findingthat you're so stuck in the
scroll you said that you can'thear your soul.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
Right, and those are choices, those are micro moment
choices, Right.
And so I think you look atanybody you know, I don't know,
I just kind of have flipped thescript.
You know, one of the ways Iknow I'm out of alignment I've
done a ton of work on so muchself-discovery oh my God Talk to
me about that, oh my gosh.
The journey of self-discoverythat I've been on over the last
four years has been reallypowerful.
(17:21):
I've played with so many thingspersonally, professionally,
spiritually, tell me what yourfavorite modalities that have
worked for you.
Okay, this is where I'm about togo.
I mean, it changed.
It's one of the things I it's apart of the art of
self-expressionism, which is oneof our L's, because HALA HALER
stands for one.
(17:41):
Each letter kind of, is a in mykeynotes is a piece of the
framework that I teach.
And the second L is leverageyour design.
For me, it's human design allday long.
I don't know if you've done anyhuman design work.
Speaker 1 (17:53):
I haven't, but I'm actually going to meet somebody
next week who's really into it,because I've never done it.
My God, I think I'm a generator.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
Oh, yeah, cool, Okay, so you know you are.
Yeah, okay, that's great,that's good, that makes sense.
70% of the world are generators, manifesting generators or
manifestors.
Right, 20% of the world areprojectors.
I'm a projector and when Ifound out I was a projector, I
was pissed.
I was like run it again, run itagain.
(18:22):
You put in the time wrong, runit again, baby, I am a
manifesting generator, I know it.
But see, now I understood whythings started breaking for me,
because I'm trying to besomething like against my design
and human design, if I couldlike sum it up, and, like you
know, I'm in school, like I am astudent of the work.
Right now.
I'm actually building a souldiving practice.
I want to become a practitionerhere, like I love it so much,
(18:45):
sabrina, that I am like in thelab on it and studying it.
But I think it's this reallybeautiful.
Like it is basically a soul mapof how prosperous you can
become when your full potentialis tapped into and turned on.
And what it is is a snapshot ofyou at birth.
(19:05):
But what it doesn't and all thepotential that exists in you
like you from the minute, seconddate, time you were born but
what it doesn't take intoconsideration is all the human
conditioning that gets in theway right.
That jumps into our life.
So we've got all this stuff.
So it's like it's the potentialof you when the hallways of
(19:26):
your house are cleaned up.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Right, it's like for people who are listening.
You're like what the heck areyou guys talking?
Speaker 2 (19:31):
about.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Yeah, it's like astrology Meets.
Speaker 2 (19:35):
Meets the I Ching meets, quantum physics Meets,
gene Keys meets.
So it's like science.
It's like because astrology isfun, but I've never really I
like I love all that stuff, youknow, but this was something for
me that felt for the first timelike the quantum physics of it
(19:56):
really hooked me and the scienceof that and some it was
undeniable.
Wait, okay.
Speaker 1 (20:06):
So if anybody's listening and you're like, okay,
so if you have chat GPT whicheverybody I bet you do just plug
in your birth date, where youwere born and the time and it'll
tell you your what is it called.
You just said it.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Your human design profile is right, so it's your-.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
Yes, and then you could read up on it, so you
don't have to pay anything.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
You could just at least know it's free, you can,
you can get the snapshot forfree and then you know there are
so many beautiful people youcan work with to go deeper into
it.
But the reason I brought it upis like I know I'm out of
alignment, like bitterness, likeso when you talk about journey
of self-discovery and like tellme about that.
So human design kind of cameinto play and I started really
(20:50):
reading and studying myself andlearning more about, like all
this potential and maybe whereshadow sides were coming up and
just things that weren't healedand oh my gosh and oh my gosh,
and just environments that workfor me, environments that don't
work for me.
And one of the things humandesign teaches you is it'll show
you how it'll give you twowords so how you know when
you're in alignment, when thingsare working, this is how you're
going to feel, and when thingsare not working, you know this
(21:11):
is when this is coming up.
You know you are out ofalignment and you can either
awareness, shut it down and callit back or keep going down that
rabbit hole and push everythingaway from you.
But I went through it.
Mine is bitterness, and so Iwent through a phase, Sabrina
and this is so, not holler but Iwas like super bitter, like I
was that girl that was like easy, oh, must be nice, easy, how
(21:41):
long ago was this?
I'll feel it and I'm like, oh,now I know it, now I know, and
I'm like no, no, no, no, no, no,I call it back and I get myself
, I can get myself to feelinggood about things faster, right,
whereas before I would ruminateand then I was wondering why
things weren't working oropportunities weren't coming or
doors were closing or I was, youknow, breaking out or not
(22:02):
sleeping, or just all thesethings weren't.
I was so out of alignment, likejust like it felt like my
business and my life and mybrain was just like like I was
broken, you know, because I waslike sort of fighting who I came
here to be.
And once I found out I was aprojector, I was like, oh, we
are 20% of the planet, like weare not your typical.
(22:26):
We are typical.
We do not generate our ownenergy.
So I'm sitting here trying to bea generator in a projector body
, wondering why things aren'tworking, like I'm here to sort
of be more receptive and to Ican't even every time the words
come out of my mouth it feelsuncomfortable, but like I'm here
to actually because and you'regonna listen to this and roll
(22:46):
your eyes because I did too butI'm actually here to like do
less and like surrender and letgo and all this stuff.
But I was like well, how do Ipay my mortgage, like?
How do I like I got bills topay, I got a team, I got a book
to launch.
How do you sit back and likesurrender when you got shit to
do?
Right, you know I have peoplethat depend on me, and so I had
(23:06):
to like figure out what thatlooked like for me, and human
design was one of the manymodalities.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
For me it's like one out of my mom says how do you
know what works?
You do so many things.
I'm like I don't care, I don'tcare.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Give me all of them.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
As long as.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
I'm happy, like the rap work.
Yeah, all of it, you talk aboutleveling up.
Speaker 1 (23:25):
You describe those seasons where things that once
maybe felt good at some point inyour life suddenly don't feel
like you were just talking aboutin alignment or just don't feel
good, and that's consideredleveling up.
How can you reframe thoseuncomfortable parts?
Because I think, especially atleast at my age going, you know,
I'm in my late 40s, the thingsthat I used to find fun I don't
(23:48):
find fun anymore.
And then I'm like, well, who amI now?
I'm sort of in this in-betweentime and you say that that's
that uncomfortable.
Leveling up is growth.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
So, yeah, that liminal space, what you're
talking about is the liminalright.
You're kind of in betweennowhere and not yet.
You're not like yet finished onyour journey, but you're no
longer in your 20s, right.
So you're in this, like youknow, same, like I'm 49, you
know, and I feel it on a soullevel.
But I think that's also awesome, like one of the things that I
think I get really excited about.
(24:20):
I think we get I don't know,I'm really I love endings, I
love change.
I love that because it meanssomething new is about to drop
in.
And so, you know, as I'veleveled up and had a lot of
endings that were a part of thatleveling up whether they were
(24:40):
business relationships or sortof even companies, stages, rooms
that built me no longer feellike the right rooms for me,
friendships that now you knowyou go through, friendships that
used to feel like home now havetension, right.
This is like why you'll stand inyour closet and you'll have all
(25:01):
these beautiful clothes andyou're like I have nothing to
wear.
I have nothing to wear and I'mlike, oh well, maybe it's not
yours anymore.
Yeah, like, maybe maybe it'sjust not for you anymore.
And I think this is the pursuitof self-expressionism and
self-expression itself.
It's like how do we go figureout how to, to figure out what
(25:23):
is for us right?
And we'll never do that ifwe're not brave enough to like
surrender to the ending and letgo a little bit so we can let
new stuff come in from theoutside.
I think so many times we holdon to things but if something
isn't for you anymore, it willlike period, it will not stay
with you and you will not wannastay with it.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
Or it will stay with you, but it'll drag you down.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
Or it'll stay with you but it'll drag you down, or
it'll stay with you and you willbe miserable and sick and
irritable and stressed out andsnapping at everybody and stuck
You'll feel stuck.
You'll feel like you're in arut Again.
You'll stand in your closet andbe like I have nothing.
Well, maybe that isn't for youanymore.
And so this is where a lot ofthis stuff kind of all works
together in the art ofself-expressionism, because, you
know, point of view andperspective and courting your
creativity and experimentingwith your fear and building all
(26:13):
the courage it takes to do stufflike this is a big part of the
process, because it is not forthe faint of heart, it is not
easy, but I think endings arethe price we pay for the joy and
the beauty and the abundance ofa new beginning, and so I sort
of welcome an ending.
And you know, certainly you knowwe're going to lose people we
love, and I'm not necessarilytalking about death.
I think we're all going to movethrough tragedy.
(26:34):
We've, all you know, lostpeople we love and we will
continue to, and so I think youneed to take your time to move
through that.
I'm not saying it's an ending,move on.
I think death holds its owncategory, right.
That's a loss that takes a soul, however much time it needs to
move through that.
But I'm talking about endingsin business and business
(26:55):
relationships and liferelationships and partnerships
and friendships and just withlook and feel and clutter and
just letting things go in yourlife.
It's just a beautiful way toreset the playing field and
honor where you've been but alsoget excited about where you're
going, and so that's kind of howI flipped the script and it
(27:15):
helps me get through thatliminal space a little bit
faster, right, because I meandefinitely, you know, one of the
things I'm feeling happen a lotright now are friendships that
used to feel like home.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
Can we talk about this a little bit?
We need to talk about this,okay, because a lot of my my
friends, new friends, aretalking about this and again, I
don't know if it's a 40s thing,but it's like almost this new
awakening that, oh, my friends,you know, from 20 years ago or
even 10, it doesn't, it doesn'talign anymore and it's not a bad
(27:48):
thing, it's just a movement,and I think a lot of you know I
was talking to my friend theother day.
She has nothing in common witha friend of hers that lives
nearby her and she feels veryguilty not wanting to hang out
with this person and Icompletely understand that.
But I think that there's noshame in moving, you know, away.
(28:08):
It doesn't mean you have toghost someone, right?
You know you don't have to dothat, but it's okay and I think
you know you can't expect tohave the same things in common
with everybody for 20, 30, evensometimes 10 years.
Speaker 2 (28:23):
It's crazy and I have such like, I'm such a loyal
person, right, and I like in myride or dies, or my ride or dies
, but there's still frictionthere, especially as I keep
becoming and keep becoming andkeep becoming and keep becoming,
and as it gets edgier andwilder and more holler and all
these like things that live inmy head that I wanted to bring
(28:43):
to life for years.
And you know my people know me,but I think it also scares them
because will you still be mybooty, right?
Like if you change, and it alsois like if you change too much.
It also holds up a mirror tothe change someone's not willing
to make in themselves, right,and so there's.
It is a really.
I think it's one of the toughestdances.
That's why the self-discoveryis so important and the caring
(29:06):
of self and all the stuff we do,whether we put ourselves in a
sauna or a cold plunge, or thebreath work or the human design,
or you just sit outside andstare at the stars.
You got to have somethingoutside of your work, like
that's what this is really allabout.
It's about having somethingoutside of what you do every day
, whether you're working incorporate, working for yourself
or raising a family, whatever itis that your work is.
(29:27):
You have to have something foryou, you, you, you like, like
it's.
And that work I do on myself,that self-discovery, that
obsession with it, gives megrace and pressure under fire,
but certainly the patience to beable to say this has nothing to
do with me, right, and I wouldask everybody for their opinions
(29:48):
.
Like my best friends, peoplewho, like, have never built a
business, people who literallyhave never.
They have no dreams.
They ask the places I'm goingin my head like their worlds.
(30:09):
Couldn't even imagine thekingdoms I've built inside the
Hall of Earth, right, but I'mbanking my future on an opinion
of someone I went to collegewith and used to like drink,
Captain and Cokes and smokecigarettes with.
I love you, but like you'venever built a business.
And what am I doing?
Right, but I was so addicted tothe approval of these women.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
I got you.
I totally understand.
Speaker 2 (30:30):
That I love myself.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
It took me a long time to figure that out, you
know, long time.
I used to completely be thesame, and sometimes now, when I
hear people having an opinion onwhatever subject, let's just
say you know, it's my fashion,whatever.
And then I'll look at them andbe like do I like their style?
It's like no.
So then why am I like?
(30:51):
Why do I care?
Speaker 2 (30:52):
Yeah, right, when I want your life like I love you
and I love your life, the lifeyou've built for yourself, but I
wouldn't want that life.
So I've also been like, okay,be very careful.
I read about this in the booktoo.
Like to your point be verycareful.
Like there is somethingpowerful about having a network
and people that can affirm you,affirm you and give you that
(31:14):
like, ooh, like creative nudgethat you're moving in the right
direction.
But they're also like with you,they're on the field, they're
in our, they're in alignmentwith where you're at.
Like I think that's verydifferent than like asking
opinions, like, do you like this?
Do you like this?
Do you like this?
Because then you'll.
Just it's like wait, no, do Ilike this?
And I think that's become mynew compass, because it's very
dangerous to outsource opinionsand give away power to all of
(31:36):
these people outside of you,right, when 99% of the time, you
know you know the answer.
And I'm kind of like in thisera now of like, okay, wait,
that's great.
Like every time I post on socialI just said it today, before we
got on the air I was like I go,even me posting this.
I'm like, say, I'm talking tomy Instagram right now.
I'm like, okay, me posting thisto you right now.
I'm like, okay, me posting thisto you right now.
(31:57):
I love you follower, fan friend, I go, I don't really care if
you like this or not, I likethis and I love this book.
Because I'm out promoting mybook right and I'm like, and
this matters, and if I don'tspeak up or say anything, so if
I'm sitting on my social likeworrying about all my friends
from college and high schoolbeing like annoyed about how
much I'm talking about my book,like I'm doing myself such a
disservice right, I know and itjust steals it from all the
(32:17):
people that could use it, andit's also like it's just so
dangerous.
So I'm like no, I like this.
I like this content.
I like the shirt I'm wearing.
I like the bubble braid today.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
I'm going to get on.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
I'm going to pop off today.
I'm going to talk about this.
I'm going to talk still inpractice on this stuff.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
It doesn't get any easier.
You just get braver andstronger.
You do get stronger.
It's micro.
Can you talk about your Barnesand Noble moment that you talked
about in the book?
Speaker 2 (32:48):
Oh, my God, when I went and drove myself in my like
dark night of the soul and Idrove myself to Barnes and Noble
, yeah, the way I opened thebook.
Okay yeah.
So I was like in a spiral againbitterness, bitterness,
bitterness.
I was in this like spiral of,like self-loathing, right, and I
was 100% blocking all of myblessings, like I was just in a
(33:11):
dark headspace, beating myselfup full of self-doubt,
overwhelmed, confused about what, and, honestly, it was all
because I was had my head on aswivel.
I was just looking around atwhat everybody else was doing
and there's this thing thathappens, sabrina, when you get
to a certain level.
I don't know if you'veexperienced this yet, but I call
(33:32):
them the money grabbers.
The money grabbers start comingaround.
So once you get a certain level, so this happens in the
speaking business okay, moneygrabbers start coming around.
So once you get a certain level, so this happens in the
speaking business okay, moneygrabbers start coming around.
So you get to a certain leveland you're like okay, you know,
I'm like, you know, this is backin 2019.
My first book came out in 2020.
Like I'm, I'm popping off,right, I'm speaking on all these
stages and I'm starting to gethot, right and all this stuff.
You know my speaking businessscale seven figures, all this
(33:53):
People are talking about me andall of a sudden, money grabbers
come around and the phone startsringing with agents, managers,
people branding, courses, click,scale, go, boom.
This is what.
If you holler, you know we needto get on a call.
If you really want to get tothis level, you got to do this.
And this is what they're doing.
This is what they're doing.
You need this, you need thiscourse, you need that.
And then all of a sudden you'relike, oh, and you're like, I
(34:14):
guess I do.
I wanna get to the next level.
I wanna be yeah, I wanna be onthe big stage.
So sure, take my money.
So I'm like writing all ofthese checks to people, right,
and you know, just all thesepeople were getting rich off my
insecurities.
But I'm going soul bankrupt,right, because I'm like lost and
confused and listening to allof these people outside of me,
(34:41):
and so I lost source and compassand knew that I wanted to
create a movement around my lastname but was being told that it
would never work.
So I, in the middle of theconfusion, go to Barnes Noble
and I love a Barnes Noble, Ilove the way it smells.
I love all the notebooks, I loveall the pens.
I love all the gifts, right, Ijust love the poetry section.
(35:05):
I just like all the books there, right?
The music, ooh, the books onart, you know, it just is great.
The kids section have you everjust hung out even like the
teens section?
Speaker 1 (35:15):
I have a nine-year-old.
Speaker 2 (35:16):
Oh yeah.
So you know, I mean, like Ilove it, I go to the kids
section, like you might low key,every now and then.
If you're ever in Arizona theShea and the 101, you would see
me sitting on those littlechairs.
I do it, why not?
It's just like it's such a fun.
It's something I'll do oncreativity dates every now and
then and I just kind of get intothe.
I'm like, yeah, like I buynotebooks, I buy pens, I buy a
(35:39):
bunch of poetry books, I buy abunch of children's books in
verse, like kids books in verse,and and just it was like and I
just made a decision right thenand there scratches not a
computer where I can deletethings.
(36:00):
I'm going to scribble, scratchand just start writing again,
because I had always lovedpoetry.
It's something I'd kind of keptsecret for many years because I
didn't even think it would bepossible to do motivational
poetry or write some bars.
I'm like this is crazy, likewho do?
I think I am and I just I kindof kept it hidden and I just
started writing again andpulling out the old notebooks
(36:21):
and sort of that self-expression, that choice to self-express,
to pick up the pens and thenotebooks and to sit in the kids
section and to peruse thepoetry and to just smell the
Barnes and Noble and to just sitdown and write those first five
words.
And in that first poem Irewrote again after years.
That choice to self-expresssaved me.
(36:41):
I really believe it did.
I've seen plenty of shamans,I've done all the self-discovery
, I've taken all the courses,all the coaches, and it's all
beautiful and great, but myself-expression saved me and I
think it continues to, becauseit reminds me of me.
Because it reminds me of me.
It's just me hanging with meand it just, you know, it was
just a powerful sort of cosmicday for me and I just felt very
(37:06):
and my best friend also, I thinkwhat got me to the Barnes Noble
.
And here's the thing I did nottell you and I don't even know
if I alluded to this in the book, but my best friend, jodi, had
said to me just moments beforethat Barnes Noble trip.
She said you know, jodi, andshe kept hearing me flail, flail
, flail.
I was just so lost, all overthe place, beat myself up, beat
(37:28):
myself up, beat myself up.
And she's like you know what,jodi, you keep talking about all
this poetry, you keep talkingabout it, you keep talking about
it.
She goes you know what, and shewas one who told me about these
children's books.
She's two small boys, an eightand a 10-year-old.
She goes there's these booksthat are written in verse.
You should go pick them up.
And she goes you shouldconsider doing your next book in
verse.
And just to hear, it was likeshe dropped it so casually, but
(37:52):
it was almost like it was likeall of a sudden my world went
like this woman outside of methat I deeply love and respect.
That is almost like I don'thave a relationship with my mom.
So my girls, my home girls fromlike the old school, ride or
die.
I put a lot of pressure on them.
God love them because they'relike mamas to me, you know, and
their opinions do mean a lot,which can be dangerous.
(38:14):
And we've cleaned up this messa little bit.
Me and my besties can bedangerous, and we've cleaned up
this mess a little bit, me andmy besties.
But Jodi did see something inme that I hadn't yet saw in
myself, and her saying that andreflecting it to me sort of put
my world in 5D and I said, oh,my God, you know.
So that's what got me to BarnesNoble, like, well, let's go
play around in that section,let's go look up.
And she gave me all these booksthat her kids were reading.
So I went to go find thoseauthors and I just started
(38:38):
playing with it and that's howall this began.
Speaker 1 (38:41):
Yeah, it's funny that I have a very similar situation
that happened with me, and I'mtelling this because it's going
to be different for everyone andI think inspiration can come in
the times that you don't evenexpect it.
My book that I'm working oncame right before I was going to
do a hot yoga class.
The whole idea came to me whileI was just like waiting for the
(39:04):
class to begin and sometimesyou just have to be able to be
silent to listen to those voices.
But also in yourself you havesometimes inspiration.
But to be able to have a circlearound you that you trust, that
wants you to succeed, isimportant.
You don't want to surroundyourself with yes people all the
(39:25):
time because there is no.
It's so much.
I was telling a friend of minehe just came out with a movie.
He brought it over here, letsome people listen to it, asked
for notes.
I told him the truth.
Everybody else just clapped itwas great.
Then, when he left, everybodywas like giving notes and I said
why don't you say it to himwhen he was here?
Because it's very hard forpeople to tell it is.
(39:45):
It's hard.
It's easier for people to saygood job and keep it moving.
Then, hey, can we sit and letme tell you all the things I
think you could do to improvethis, because I want you to
succeed as much as you do.
So be careful.
I say that to say make sure yousurround yourself with a good
circle, like you have, judy,with your best friends, with
people who want you to succeed,because they can be such a
catalyst to your next level.
Speaker 2 (40:09):
A thousand percent Like my book Holler at your
Dreams almost did not existbecause it was retitled by one
of those money grabbers I wastelling you about, because they
were telling me that HollerDreams would never work in
corporate America.
So I rebranded everything and Idid read in my keynote, read in
my website, read in the book,and we were calling it all.
They're like you're going to bethe be the verb girl, the be
(40:31):
the verb girl, and I'm like,okay, that's cute.
But I'm like, oh, I guessthat's what I need to do to be
successful and to get booked incorporate.
And I was afraid I need to paymy mortgage.
I don't want to lose myspeaking business.
I've built this thing for 10years and what have I done?
And so I panicked, changedeverything to be the verb, and
so it was coming time just thisspring.
So this is going to be likepeople that tell you the truth.
Just this spring I had to makea decision on the book cover and
(40:53):
I couldn't do it.
I was like sick, like Icouldn't, I could not, I was
having.
No, I lost like a year's worthof videotape of me on stage
giving the be the verb talk,because it's I can't even look
at myself.
It's like a shell of me rightbecause I'm like.
So again, if something's notyours, if something's not yours.
Speaker 1 (41:08):
Yes, listen to me as a brand manager.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
So when I had to make a decision on the cover, I sent
it out to a trusted group ofadvisors.
Two or which which were my bestfriends?
One is my.
The three people, the threepeople out of 10 that told me
the truth, are my two bestfriends from high school.
They both go cool, judy,they're like what happened to
Holler at your Dreams?
Love you.
But what happened to Holler atyour Dreams?
They're like.
We're so confused and I'm like,okay, okay.
(41:32):
So and then my creativedirector, who is still with me
ride or die to this day.
She literally left me a voicemessage and she goes you're not
going to like this, but that ischeesy as hell, stupid as hell.
You are way cooler than that.
This is not the vibe she goes.
I'd rather just be dangerouslyinspiring ideas for the wildly
dope soul.
What happened to Holler at yourDreams?
(41:53):
So three people out of 10,everybody else was like God,
love them.
They're like you're amazing.
Speaker 1 (42:00):
Oh my God, we're so proud of you.
Speaker 2 (42:01):
I love them for that.
You need to surround yourselfwith people, but coming full
circle to the point of like ifit's not be, the verb was
assigned to me by a brandmanager outside of me.
It was never mine, so it wasnever going to stay with me and
this is why I wasn't sleeping,et cetera.
But it almost did not happenbecause I was so afraid and I
let someone else from theoutside try to paint the canvas
(42:22):
of my life with their brush.
And may we never do that.
May we never do that.
May we never allow anyone elseto paint our lives canvas with
their brush.
Speaker 1 (42:31):
Judy.
Thank you so much for everyonelistening, obviously, on the
show notes.
I'll have how you can get intouch with Judy.
The book is Holler at yourDreams.
It is available September 9th,right, yes, she's out A
pre-order if you're listening tothis before this pre-order and
it's available on Amazon andwhere you get your books.
Speaker 2 (42:49):
You love buying books yeah, Thank you so much, Judy.
Thanks Sabrina.
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