September 15, 2025 • 35 mins
In this powerful episode, bestselling author T L Swan shares her incredible journey from financial ruin to literary success. After losing everything in a failed business venture, T L discovered a box of stories she'd written as a teenager and made a life-changing decision: she would write a book using a free 30-day trial of Microsoft Word because she couldn't afford to buy the program.
That single decision led to a career that's produced 25 novels, millions of copies sold worldwide, and bestseller status in multiple countries. But T L's story goes beyond the numbers. She opens up about the mindset shifts that transformed her life, including how reading "The Secret" became a turning point during her darkest days.
We also dive into a topic that affects countless women but rarely gets discussed openly: how perimenopause and menopause can derail careers and creativity. TL shares her two-year struggle with what doctors called "burnout" but was actually hormonal changes, and how finding the right treatment brought her back to full creative power.
Whether you're facing your own challenges, curious about the publishing world, or navigating midlife changes, T L's story of resilience, reinvention, and taking control will leave you inspired. Plus, find out about her latest release, the Miles High Club Deluxe Edition, and why she made the bold move to buy back her rights from Amazon.
This is a conversation about second chances, trusting your instincts, and never giving up on your dreams.
Connect with T L Swan:
https://tlswanauthor.com/
T L on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/tlswanauthor/
T L on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/tlswanauthor
Link to pre-order the Miles High Club Series Deluxe Editions:
https://tlswanauthor.com/coming-soon/
Connect with Sabrina:
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Redesigning Life.
I'm your host, sabrina Soto,and this is the space where we
have honest conversations aboutpersonal growth, mindset shifts
and creating a life that feelstruly aligned.
In each episode, I'll talk toexperts in their fields who
share their insights to help youstep into your higher self.
Let's redesign your life fromthe inside out.
Welcome to another episode ofRedesigning Life.
(00:24):
This week is different.
I have an amazing author, butwe're not going to just talk
about books.
We're going to talk about a lotof other things, especially
menopause and perimenopause,which I know a lot of you are
dealing with now.
We have TL Swan with us today.
Tl, thank you so much forjoining us.
I'm so excited for thisconversation.
(00:44):
I know you're in Australia, soI appreciate your time.
Thank you so much for joiningus.
I'm so excited for thisconversation.
I know you're in Australia, soI appreciate your time.
Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Oh my.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
God.
Okay.
So you've sold millions ofbooks worldwide.
You have every bestseller list.
You've built this incrediblecareer.
You have an incredible story ofresilience.
For listeners who may not beaware of your books, can you
kind of tell us a little bitabout your early days, how you
even first started writing, gotinto even doing?
Speaker 2 (01:12):
these novels.
So this definitely was not myfirst jam.
So I did a bit of everything,ended up being a psychologist,
made a bad business decisionwhen I was around 40 with my
husband and we lost everything,and it was just the worst period
of my life.
You know, I suddenly foundmyself checking the bank account
(01:34):
before I bought a coffee, andyou know it's easy to do.
You find out.
You know that just because youwork hard doesn't mean that you
go well.
So I was on this poor mejourney.
You know everything's happeningto me.
Poor me, poor me.
And I read a book called theSecret by Rhonda Byrne.
If you haven't read it, read itChanged my life, changed my
(01:56):
life, changed my life.
And it's all about you know.
You're looking for the signsand you can change your life,
and you know.
So I was like, okay, I'm goingto get a sign.
Two weeks later I'm cleaning outmy garage because I was all in
the whole get rid of all thejunk from my life.
I'm, you know, throwingeverything out that doesn't
serve me and I found a box fromwhen I moved out of home when I
(02:18):
was 18.
And I've never seen this box.
I've lived in 30 houses.
Don't ask me where these boxesbe and it was full of diaries,
of stories that I'd written whenI was 16, 17, 18.
And I was, like I remember,before I met my husband, before
I was, you know, doingeverything for everybody else.
(02:40):
I wanted to be an author.
So I went inside and I couldn'tafford the Word program.
It was $270.
I couldn't afford that.
I downloaded a free 30-daytrial of Microsoft Word and I
wrote the words chapter one, andI said right, I've got 30 days
to write a book.
And that's what I did.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
That's what I did For anyone who's not watching this.
I'm like tearing up becausethis is such a it's sort of my
story too, but like the factthat I'm like speechless for a
second because there are so manypeople listening to this right
now that are in that spot andfeeling lost and feel like I
(03:23):
don't know what to do.
But the fact T that you did itbecause of a trial, that you did
because you couldn't afford theword.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
I couldn't even afford the $270.
And I was like okay, 30 days,and at this point I was still
working in the business sevendays a week.
That was losing us thousands ofdollars every week.
My husband had to take a jobseven days a week.
That was losing us thousands ofdollars every week.
My husband had to take a jobtwo hours away, so he would get
up at four o'clock, drive twohours, work his 12 hour day,
drive two hours home.
I had three little kids that Iused to take to work with me and
(03:55):
I was getting.
You know.
I would run around and doeverything and at nine o'clock
at night I would sit down and Iwould write till 2 am Because
this was what was going to getme out of.
You know I was going to save usand thank God, but it did, it's
like Okay.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
So for those of you listening who are familiar with
T's work, you know who I'mtalking to right now.
But just understand that thesuccess that came after this is
phenomenal.
So what was that next step?
So you wrote, but then how didyou get to where you are now?
Speaker 2 (04:32):
Well, it's been.
You know, the readers have justbeen so incredible.
I'm very honest with my journeyand I'm not perfect and I
definitely don't writeliterature for the generations.
I write fun in the moment,great stories about normal girls
(04:52):
like us who do great things andfind great men and have these
wonderful, flamboyant lives.
And they all start from nothing.
And they all start from nothingand I think that's what my
readers have resonated with is Idon't write about people you
don't know.
I write about people we know,you know.
(05:13):
So I uploaded my book.
Didn't sell many, but, you know, I had a drive.
Then I had the taste, uploadedmy second book.
You self-published, youself-published, I self-published
, I literally-published.
I just, I literally just ran itthrough an editor program,
uploaded to Amazon myself, right, and then two or three books
(05:33):
and then I wrote a book and itwent.
It was called Dr Stanton thebook and it hit the market.
It made the top 100, top 50 onAmazon.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
What do you think?
What do you attribute that to?
I mean, obviously it was anamazing book, but you know, I
feel like I just got the coverright.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
If you look up Dr Stanton, I got the cover right,
I got the blurb right and I gotthe story right as in.
You know, it's a doctor, it's acouple that you know hook up in
Las Vegas, never see each otheragain, you know, six years
later she turns up and she's hisintern.
She's late, you know, and it'sjust this funny banter, like
(06:18):
it's a great story but it justhit the market.
Anyway, after that, I got anemail this is funny from
Montlake, which is Amazon'spublishing app, and they'd never
signed anybody from Australiabefore Like they don't sign many
people asking me to write forthem, and I thought it was my
(06:39):
husband.
What, like playing a joke on you.
Yeah, so I've written F off.
I know it's you, blah, blah,blah, giving him, like giving
him, because it came from apersonal email, right.
So I was just like you're notfunny, don't annoy me.
Oh, my, I'm cringing for you.
(06:59):
It was Amazon.
Anyway, they've been so amazing.
So, yeah, they took me on.
I've written six books for themand these books that I've just
got now this is.
You know, we're 25 books downthe road.
I've hit number one in everycountry and I'm sold millions
and millions of books, have themost incredible readers, like
(07:22):
they're all become friendsbecause it's like a big girl
gang.
We hang out.
But these books now that I'mreleasing the Miles High, I
actually bought the rights forthese back from Amazon.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
Okay, Taylor Swift.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
So I did this a year ago.
So when she released it she'ddone it I was like, yes, go.
She's got the same idea as me.
So I brought these back fromAmazon and I'm re-releasing them
with my own publishing company.
Now I own a publishing companywith the most incredible staff
you've ever ever met and, yeah,let's go.
(07:57):
So I'm kind of nervous aboutthis, this release, but at the
same time I'm just so proud ofthe full circle that it's been
so.
Speaker 1 (08:08):
the Mile High Club Deluxe Edition is coming out
September 16th.
If you're listening to thiswhile you're driving or if
you're on a walk, don't worry,I'll have it all in the notes
because it's going to be amazing.
But in this Mile High Clubseries, if someone's never read
your books before, which bookwould you say to start with?
Speaker 2 (08:26):
So it's a series of four brothers.
They own the biggest mediacompany in the world.
It's based in New York and it'sabout.
You know, they come from money.
They are these rich, playboy,gorgeous men and they fall in
love with ordinary women andit's just the push and pull and
(08:48):
they're funny and they're sexy.
I write the story that I wantto read.
I want escapism and I want tofeel good when I read.
I don't want to read abouthardships and terrible things
because, let's face it, theworld is pretty horrible right
now.
So I want escapism.
So that's what you get.
(09:10):
That's what you get with mybooks.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
Okay, wait, I want to go back and I'm going to.
But which one do I read first?
The Stopover, the Stopover, theStopover okay.
The Stopover.
Who wants to read it with me?
Dm me, please.
So let me go back T to thestory of the Secret.
How did you even get introducedto the Secret, oh my?
Speaker 2 (09:29):
God.
So this in itself is a freaky.
So I've got a writing group andI think we've got about 1,400,
1,500 girls.
So my very first video was onthe Secret and I tell them the
story about even the way.
I found it was weird.
I was up folding washing onenight at 11 o'clock because and
(09:51):
this is just at this time we hadforeclosures on our house.
Like I was expecting, we were,you know, two months behind on
our bank, like because we eitherlost our house or the business,
and if I lost the house westill had a chance to keep
everything, but if I lost thebusiness, then I couldn't pay
for the house.
(10:11):
You know what I mean.
So it was I'm just like week byweek trying to get through and
I used to clean my house fromtop to bottom every night
because I thought, if tomorrow'sthe day that the sheriff comes
and locks me out of the house, Iwant it to be clean, right,
just anyway.
That makes me cry, but anyway.
So I was folding washing and anOprah special came on.
(10:34):
It was about the secret.
It was at 11 o'clock at night.
You know the Oprah special onthe secret yeah, yeah, yeah, 11
o'clock at night, right.
So I sat on the lounge and I waswatching it and I was like this
, this is this.
It was like she was justtalking to me.
And the next day I went to lookfor this secret book right,
couldn't afford it, but I waslike, damn it, I'm buying this
(10:56):
book.
I just knew that I had to haveit.
And I went to the nearest.
You know, I went from bookstoreto bookstore, to store to
bookstore.
No one had it.
I ended up 45 minutes from myhouse to get this stupid book.
I wasted three hours and I'vegot home and I said to my
husband I found the book that'sgoing to save us.
And he was like God, oh yeahLike, oh, my God.
(11:25):
Here we.
Oh my god, here we go.
At this point we were just kindof humoring each other.
Whatever it took to get usthrough that day, because it was
such a tough time, um, we wouldjust go with it.
Do you know what I mean?
Like if he wanted to watchfootball all night and do
nothing on the that, that thatwas okay, because we were
tiptoeing through life.
Speaker 1 (11:40):
at that point we were in survival mode.
Speaker 2 (11:42):
We were in survival mode, so we just humid each
other.
But here we are, 10 years later.
He's retired, he drives hisdream car, he plays golf three
days a week.
We are just so.
We made it together, thank God.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
This was over 10 years ago, because when I
watched the Secret it was 2006,.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
Before it was on Oprah yeah, so it was 2014 when
I read it.
Okay, yeah, this is when ithappened to me.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
My story was the same , like I was just.
Speaker 2 (12:13):
Really.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
I was in a weird, not happy spot in my life.
I watched the Secret and thenext morning I went on
Craigslist and found my job forHGTV.
It's such a crazy story and Iknow there are a lot of authors
and people who say, like theSecret's BS and all that, and I
just think that they'remisinterpreting what the laws
(12:35):
are.
But I agree with you Like it'schanged my life so much.
So obviously your life'schanged immensely, yeah, and
just in the success that youhave created for yourself, for
your family.
If you could go back and talkto the version of you that
thought that you were going tolose your house, you're losing
(12:56):
your business, you're starting anew career.
Like what would you say to hernow?
You know what?
Speaker 2 (13:01):
I at the time, and I think anyone can relate to this
things just seem so dark thatyou just don't, you can't see it
turning around.
You just can't see the light atthe end of the tunnel.
And the only way I attribute mysuccess is I've always just
(13:22):
believed.
If I find my thoughts turningdark, no, it's like I have to do
a conscious decision to notthink the worst.
I have to think the best and Ihave to bring myself in right
and I even, you know, even tothis day, if I find myself and
you know everybody has a bad dayor things get on top or you're
(13:43):
stressed out, or you feel likeyou're failing, or whatever, I
will have to have that consciousmoment like, stop it, cut this
out.
This is not helping you.
Like, bring your mind back tothe positive and when you're in
this positive mind space,opportunities just present
themselves, but they just don't.
When you're closed off andnegative, it's like you have
(14:04):
this aura of negative and it'slike a force field to keep out
the good things.
Yes, so you need to have thisopen.
Okay, come at me.
Whatever's going to be good,let's go.
Speaker 1 (14:15):
Okay.
So I agree with you a hundredpercent and I also think like a
part of the attracting theopportunities is taking care of
yourself, both mentally andphysically, and when that your
self-esteem rises and then youbring in the more opportunities.
But I'm, I'm and that's why Ithink people think the secret
means you just think goodthoughts and everything.
(14:35):
No, it's way more than that, soit's OT.
When you decided to buy therights back for the Miles High
Club, what was that decisionlike?
Because if somebody that'sscary, this is not only a
financial decision but scary.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Okay, so I'll go back a further step for that.
So I wanted to be in bookstores.
So it's like this convolutedstep that you need to do when
you're an author, when you're anindie author.
They do fantastic.
They outsell every book inbookstores.
They're amazing, right, but weall want movie deals or
television series deals, blah,blah, blah.
(15:15):
To get that, you need to be aNew York seller To make a list.
You want to be a list, New YorkTimes.
This is what the producers arelooking for now and this is what
they're picking from.
You don't qualify for thoselists unless you're in
bookstores, Right, Right?
So this is why indie books,like indie authors, are now
trying to get into stores,because they realize the value
(15:35):
of a list, Even though, let'sface, it's a ridiculous list.
Who cares, right?
But the producers get a biggerbudget for your film if you're
on that stupid list, right?
So that's when I started goingokay, let's work backwards.
I need to be in bookstores.
I started talking to publishingcompanies and the deals that
(15:57):
they were offering were just soridiculously greedy and you know
, they were lifetime deals.
Like who signs a contract for alifetime deal?
But you already had a trackrecord Like you had a speed and
I worked with Amazon, amazon'sdifferent.
Amazon is indie, they're veryforward thinking, they're
fantastic, right.
(16:18):
So I was like I don't want tosign my rights, my year's work,
to greedy publishers.
So we just kind of, like, youknow, trod water for a little
bit and I've got like a reallygreat staff and I was like,
screw this, we're opening ourown publishing company and we're
going to offer authors a betterdeal, like they deserve to be
(16:40):
looked after.
This is not okay.
So we opened our own publishingcompany, which was called
Keeperton.
It's Keeperton because it'sfinders keepers that's what I
love, and you know the staffthat run that.
I don't have anything to dowith that.
We hired, we headhunted staffand they are just so incredible.
The first three books they putout this year, our first three
(17:02):
books, have all hit USA Today.
They're just unbelievable,right?
These girls are all go-gettersand they're all like me and you.
So, yeah, they came to me andsaid we're buying your rights
back.
Let's try and buy your rightsback.
Speaker 1 (17:21):
So I think a lot of people too, like okay, it might
not be writing, but I want to do.
I want to like go and createthis new venture.
You're saying you have thisamazing staff.
That's another part of thepuzzle.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
How did?
Speaker 1 (17:33):
you create or how did you even attract this amazing
support staff for yourself?
Speaker 2 (17:44):
this amazing support staff for you, for yourself.
So I and I think you'll be likethis.
When you've been throughsomething quite dark and you've
come out of it and you've fought, you learn to trust your gut
instincts that you never didbefore.
I toed the line before what Ithought was right and wrong and
now I'm not afraid.
If something doesn't feel right, it's not right, it's
definitely not right.
So my interviewing process ishow I like the person, what they
(18:09):
say in between the questionsthat I ask them.
It's their optimism and theirbelief, or it's not so much in
their natural talent, it's moreabout them as a person.
And you know, skills can betaught.
You can't change who you are.
So I go for optimism andbeautiful people.
(18:32):
We have a policy.
We call it a no-arsesolespolicy.
We don't deal with arsesoles.
We don't deal with agents whoare arsesoles.
We don't deal with authors whoare arsesoles.
No, publishing nothing.
We just don't deal withassholes.
We don't deal with agents whoare assholes.
We don't deal with authors whoare assholes.
No, publishing nothing.
We just don't.
Life is too short to be stuckdealing with horrible people.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
I agree 100%.
So how many books now have youpublished?
25.
25 books you talked about.
You've been pretty open aboutperimenopause and menopause
really derailing your career.
Can you describe a moment thatlike during that time, because
in order to write you have to beable to be in your head and to
(19:13):
be calm, in a sense, and be liketapped in?
So can you sort of like walklisteners through a moment that
you realized something was?
Speaker 2 (19:20):
all.
Well, it's funny, you know,because I went through this
stage.
So I was writing four books ayear because, for me, like I'm
so creative as in, not creativeas wow I can do everything, but
the stories would just keepcoming and I'm like, oh, I could
do this, I could do that,everything's, this, you know,
like everything I didn't haveenough time to do all the things
that I wanted to do and Iliterally woke up one day and my
(19:44):
head was silent and there wasno ideas and I didn't really
care if I worked that day or Ijust might have a day off.
Like I just felt, you know,maybe getting sick or you've had
like a really bad hangover,like you've got a really bad
hangover, you've had two hourssleep and your care factor for
everything is zero.
Like you're just like I'm justfeeding the kids and getting
(20:08):
through the day, Like it's just.
And it went on for a week andthen it was two weeks and then I
was like something's going onwith me here and I'm a really
driven person.
Like I like to work, I like,you know, I like things to
happen.
I just literally didn't care,like I just whatever.
(20:28):
I was, like I was a differentperson.
I went to the doctor.
The doctor told me I hadburnout.
You're too.
You work too hard because youknow it's nothing for me to work
60 or 70 hours a week.
But my work isn't like work tome it's.
You know, my God, I'm gettingto write these stories about
these gorgeous, rich menrescuing women like women
(20:49):
rescuing them.
It's like a really well-paidhobby.
It's like a really super fun,well-paid hobby, like it is not
work.
And the doctor was like you'veburnt out, you need to have a
break.
So I went back to Kelly Kelly's, my right-hand man.
She's been with me for nineyears.
She's like okay, let's schedulea month off.
So we scheduled a month off.
(21:09):
Still the same.
It was just flatlining likenothing happened.
This kept going on.
I'd had every blood test yourthyroid's a little bit out, but
your bloods are all normal.
What the doctors didn't tell mewas my bloods were normal for a
50-year-old woman, which meansyou have no estrogen and they
(21:29):
think that's normal.
It was never presented to methat my lack of drive and my
lack of concentration was to dowith menopause, because I wasn't
having hot flushes.
At the same time, I have gotgirlfriends.
You know, one's having marriageproblems and one's, you know,
fighting with her children thatshe's never fought with.
(21:50):
Another one's having problemswith her neighbor.
Another one's just about tolose her job.
We're all having these with herneighbor.
Another one's just about tolose her job.
We're all having thesecollective problems that have
nothing to do with hot flushes,but what it did have to do with
was the level of our hormonesand how we were reacting to
situations.
So anyway, to put a long storyshort, for two years me and my
(22:12):
girlfriends battled all thesedifferent problems.
I was.
I went from writing four booksa year to one book a year.
Um, and then I was.
It was just so hard and I waslike, okay, yeah, I'm washed up.
I'm one of those washed upauthors now that you that.
You see in the movies.
(22:32):
Yeah, you know the ones thatare crying into the bottle of
wine on the beach because theycan't finish their book.
But in hindsight, the timingwas good, because that's when I
worked in my publishing company.
I wasn't creative, but I wasstill.
You know, I was in Hawaii.
I saw an ad come up for aSuzanne Somers book called A New
Way to Age.
Read it Another game changer.
It talks about bio-identicalhormones and how your body
(22:57):
reacts when you are not, whenyou're depleted in certain
different areas of your life, asin hormones.
I read that and I was like, ohmy God, I am not burnt out.
This is frigging menopause.
It was like a.
Why haven't anyone told me this?
Yeah, menopause, it was like a.
(23:18):
Why haven't anyone told me this?
Yeah, why.
Why has nobody told me thatmenopause is not just hot
flushes, it's concentration,it's drive, it's rage.
It's rage.
It's like care factor of zero.
Like my husband would have likea raging fit and I'd be like
like a raging fit and I'd belike, see ya, who cares Off.
You go bye Like I did not careabout anything.
(23:40):
But I did not attribute that tomenopause because no one talks
about it.
I know, I know.
This is why I'm talking aboutit, because I struggled through
two years where someone had justsaid to me you can have an
organic bioidentical cream thatyou rub on your forearm and you
will find yourself within 24hours.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
What you said, that your words struck me when you
said I felt like an imposter inmy own body, and it's so true I
think you also like calledmenopause the epidemic that
nobody talks about.
It is, it is.
But I mean, don't you think now, with social media at least?
Maybe it's my feed and thealgorithm, but I feel like
people are talking about itright.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
I feel like, yeah, I feel like Halle Berry's really
changed the needle and a few ofthe other actresses that have
come out and started talkingabout it, and I feel like this
is, you know, this is my dutythat I have to talk about it as
well.
This is the reason why I bringit up, because my readers know I
have only released one book ayear for the last three years.
(24:41):
Like I'm on the comeback now.
Then I broke my bloody back,would you believe it?
But my readers know that mywriting has slowed down.
They, you know.
I owe them to tell them thetruth why.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Yeah, which, by the way, T like one book a year.
Okay, let's just be real here.
One book a year is actuallygreat for most, you know, for
everyone.
Speaker 2 (25:06):
But you know, for us, like for me, it's just, it's
not normal.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
Weird, it's not normal.
It's changed your writinghabits.
This journey has changed yourwriting habits, is what you're
saying for sure.
So I'm back, yeah, I'm back now, thank gosh.
If somebody is listening tothis and they feel broken, what
would you?
Speaker 2 (25:25):
say to them Find yourself a holistic doctor,
don't go to a normal GP, go toone that has integrative
medicine and ask forbioidentical hormones.
So there's a difference.
Hrt is made with chemicals.
It is what's been given the badrap.
(25:46):
Bioidentical is made from yamsoybean.
It is an organic kind ofmaterial.
But what I can say in theresearch that I've been doing
myself and I'm not a doctor, soI don't you know.
But 25 years ago HRT was given areally bad rap and it got some
(26:07):
really bad press about causingcancer and causing things.
But what they've found now isnot having estrogen in our body.
Estrogen is what protects usagainst cancer.
Estrogen is what protects ourbrains from dementia and
Alzheimer's.
Estrogen is what protects oursex drive and our body from
(26:29):
aging, even the way you holdweight.
Obviously, when I was goingthrough that terrible period of
my life, the cortisol was sohigh in my body that I put on 30
kilos, about 68 pounds inAmerican.
So then I was not only battlingthat, I had gone from a size
eight to a size 16 overnight.
(26:49):
So not only was I depressed, Iwas like, okay, great, now I'm
overweight as well.
And because my estrogen wasdeclining from that time I had
no chance of losing that weight.
You know I've lost.
Now I've lost a lot of it, butI've still got some to go.
But all I can say is if a manpresented to a GP with low sex
(27:15):
drive drive because, like whocares, that's all that they
worry about they would test andgo oh my God, your testosterone
is low.
Quick, let's give it to youright.
We can go in with life-alteringchanges in our personality.
Oh, you don't have hot flushes,you're fine.
Your bloods are normal For a50-year-old woman.
(27:35):
Our bloods are not normal for ahealthy female.
Our bloods are normal for awoman going through menopause.
There is a difference in thosetwo things.
What the hell.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Don't get me started.
I agree.
I mean I've been on my ownjourney.
I don't, you know, I don'tthink I've found the right
combination yet, and I thinkthat's also frustrating, because
one doctor will tell you onething, another one.
But at least I feel like atleast listening to this, you're
not alone.
Speaker 2 (28:09):
Obviously, you know it is going to take a little bit
for you to find the solutionfor your own body, but you're
not broken, you're not crazy,you're not burnt out, you're
just you know it's hormonal,yeah, and if you're suddenly
fighting with your husband, whoyou've had a great relationship
with for 20 years, and suddenlyhe's the enemy, maybe it is
(28:32):
something to do with ourpersonality.
If you're suddenly fightingwith your neighbors or your kids
or your job or whatever, ifit's a change in your life, go
deeper, look further.
It's not just the other people.
There is a reason we'rechanging.
Like I said, the game changerfor me was reading the book A
New Way to Age, suzanne Somers.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
It explains so much for me, everyone who's listening
.
We have now three books we needto read the Stopover, the
Secret and the New Age.
Speaker 2 (29:01):
That's a lot of books , fun, fun.
The Stopover is the fun one,the other two are medicinal.
Speaker 1 (29:07):
God, I've never given so much homework in one episode
of a podcast before in my life.
Okay, so let's talk about theMile High Club Deluxe Edition
that's coming out Again.
I'm going to link to it.
What made you want to revisitthese stories?
I know you said that you boughtback the rights and this is
releasing a special edition.
So what can readers, what arethey going to get from this new
(29:28):
Deluxe Edition?
Speaker 2 (29:28):
I just wish I had it here to show you.
It is this most beautifulpinkish kind of hue artwork of
New York City Central Park.
It wraps around, it's gotsprayed edges, it's got bonus
scenes.
It starts.
I'll tell you a little bitabout how it starts.
So a girl is at an airport,someone is losing their crap in
(29:50):
the line, giving her crap.
You know they're kicking herbag and she bag and the security
guard feels sorry for her.
So he upgrades her to firstclass.
So she's sitting in first class, looking like she thinks
terrible in her tights andgrungy hair, and this
billionaire walks in and sitsnext to her in his suit.
(30:11):
Anyway, they drink wine and gettalking and there's a lot of
flirting.
And then the plane gets alayover.
It's snow, they can't land inNew York, so they have a layover
and they have this wonderfulnight right the next morning.
He doesn't ask for her number.
She's like, outraged.
(30:32):
They go back to their lives.
So she's an intern.
Years later she gets thisintern.
She doesn't know who he is.
He gives her a fake name.
She gets an internship in NewYork.
She's so excited.
She goes on the tour, gets tothe top level of the building
(30:53):
and those big blue eyes arebehind the desk.
She's like oh my God, so it'syou, so yeah it's fun.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
I know a lot of women listen to like real, like true
crime sort of podcasts and books.
I used to do the same thing.
Trust me, right now we do notneed to listen to anybody
getting murdered, anybodygetting duped Like.
These are the kind of storiesyou should listen to on your
commute to either work or ifyou're doing housework, because
(31:26):
I feel like it's a good way tojust nourish your soul.
And it kind of goes back towhat we were saying in the
beginning of our conversation,like staying high vibe, which
sounds a little woo-woo, butstaying in a positive mindset.
It matters what you listen to,and so if you don't want to
listen to something you know,new thought or something
self-help, you know, loseyourself in a novel like this,
(31:50):
because it just makes you feelbetter and it gives you like a
little bit of joy in your life.
Speaker 2 (32:01):
Yeah, and I feel like you know romance has come a
long way now.
You know it's not the oldbodice ripping, you know cringy
kind of story.
You know these characters arelike sarcastic and smart and
well-educated and they're witty.
And you know you're readingwith a smirk the whole time.
That's the only way I candescribe it.
You read with a smirk becauseit's like watching a really
great show.
I love it.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
Before you go, like what's the message you hope
women and really actually anyonewho's listening can take away
from your story?
Because you have loss, you haveresilience, you have complete
reinvention and you've takencontrol of your life in such an
inspirational way.
Like what's one message youwant to give to readers, or your
readers and my listeners.
Speaker 2 (32:42):
So my readers know my message, but look for your
listeners.
No matter how dark or howbacked into a corner you think
you are, you can turn it around.
It is literally a mindset thing.
If you just change your mindset, you can change your life and
it is I'm proof in the pudding,and every day I get to do this
(33:06):
incredible job and write aboutthese incredible characters with
the most beautiful readers andI'm living this absolute dream
life.
And if someone told me this 14years ago, when I was, you know,
70 pounds heavier, crying in mylounge room at night, every
night, cleaning my house like afrantic, panicked woman because
(33:27):
I didn't want them to lock meout of my house with it being
messy, I would never havebelieved it.
I would never have believed it.
So if I can do it, anyone cando it, because I'm nothing
special.
Speaker 1 (33:39):
Well, you are but T.
Thank you so much.
And how can people find you?
Obviously it'll be in the notes, but how to be and I know
you're huge on TikTok- oh well,yes, but I would love to take
credit for TikTok.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
but my beautiful girls run my TikTok page but
they're fantastic.
But Instagram is where you canfind me.
It's TL Swan.
Author.
I've got private Facebookgroups they're called the Swan
Squad VIP, and I've got awebsite that you can subscribe
to my newsletter.
Speaker 1 (34:11):
So I do Don't forget to get the Mile High Club Deluxe
Edition.
Speaker 2 (34:17):
Yeah, you'll see it in the stores.
It's this beautiful.
The only way I can describe itis and please link a picture of
it.
So it's this beautiful pink,abstracty art version of Central
Park.
You will see it, and it'scalled the stopover.
So I'm just so proud of thisbook.
I I love the characters.
Even when I was reading it, Iwrote some extra bonus scenes
for it so that nobody's readbefore.
(34:38):
Oh good, I read the book backand I was just like, damn, this
is a good book.
How did I do this?
Speaker 1 (34:46):
You're like I'm good, I'm good, thank you.
Speaker 2 (34:51):
Thank you so much for having me.
Welcome to Redesigning Life.
I'm your host, sabrina Soto,and this is the space where we
have honest conversations aboutpersonal growth, mindset shifts
and creating a life that feelstruly aligned.
In each episode, I'll talk toexperts in their fields who
share their insights to help youstep into your higher self.
Let's redesign your life fromthe inside out.
Welcome to another episode ofRedesigning Life.
(00:24):
This week is different.
I have an amazing author, butwe're not going to just talk
about books.
We're going to talk about a lotof other things, especially
menopause and perimenopause,which I know a lot of you are
dealing with now.
We have TL Swan with us today.
Tl, thank you so much forjoining us.
I'm so excited for thisconversation.
(00:44):
I know you're in Australia, soI appreciate your time.
Thank you so much for joiningus.
I'm so excited for thisconversation.
I know you're in Australia, soI appreciate your time.
Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Oh my.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
God.
Okay.
So you've sold millions ofbooks worldwide.
You have every bestseller list.
You've built this incrediblecareer.
You have an incredible story ofresilience.
For listeners who may not beaware of your books, can you
kind of tell us a little bitabout your early days, how you
even first started writing, gotinto even doing?
Speaker 2 (01:12):
these novels.
So this definitely was not myfirst jam.
So I did a bit of everything,ended up being a psychologist,
made a bad business decisionwhen I was around 40 with my
husband and we lost everything,and it was just the worst period
of my life.
You know, I suddenly foundmyself checking the bank account
(01:34):
before I bought a coffee, andyou know it's easy to do.
You find out.
You know that just because youwork hard doesn't mean that you
go well.
So I was on this poor mejourney.
You know everything's happeningto me.
Poor me, poor me.
And I read a book called theSecret by Rhonda Byrne.
If you haven't read it, read itChanged my life, changed my
(01:56):
life, changed my life.
And it's all about you know.
You're looking for the signsand you can change your life,
and you know.
So I was like, okay, I'm goingto get a sign.
Two weeks later I'm cleaning outmy garage because I was all in
the whole get rid of all thejunk from my life.
I'm, you know, throwingeverything out that doesn't
serve me and I found a box fromwhen I moved out of home when I
(02:18):
was 18.
And I've never seen this box.
I've lived in 30 houses.
Don't ask me where these boxesbe and it was full of diaries,
of stories that I'd written whenI was 16, 17, 18.
And I was, like I remember,before I met my husband, before
I was, you know, doingeverything for everybody else.
(02:40):
I wanted to be an author.
So I went inside and I couldn'tafford the Word program.
It was $270.
I couldn't afford that.
I downloaded a free 30-daytrial of Microsoft Word and I
wrote the words chapter one, andI said right, I've got 30 days
to write a book.
And that's what I did.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
That's what I did For anyone who's not watching this.
I'm like tearing up becausethis is such a it's sort of my
story too, but like the factthat I'm like speechless for a
second because there are so manypeople listening to this right
now that are in that spot andfeeling lost and feel like I
(03:23):
don't know what to do.
But the fact T that you did itbecause of a trial, that you did
because you couldn't afford theword.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
I couldn't even afford the $270.
And I was like okay, 30 days,and at this point I was still
working in the business sevendays a week.
That was losing us thousands ofdollars every week.
My husband had to take a jobseven days a week.
That was losing us thousands ofdollars every week.
My husband had to take a jobtwo hours away, so he would get
up at four o'clock, drive twohours, work his 12 hour day,
drive two hours home.
I had three little kids that Iused to take to work with me and
(03:55):
I was getting.
You know.
I would run around and doeverything and at nine o'clock
at night I would sit down and Iwould write till 2 am Because
this was what was going to getme out of.
You know I was going to save usand thank God, but it did, it's
like Okay.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
So for those of you listening who are familiar with
T's work, you know who I'mtalking to right now.
But just understand that thesuccess that came after this is
phenomenal.
So what was that next step?
So you wrote, but then how didyou get to where you are now?
Speaker 2 (04:32):
Well, it's been.
You know, the readers have justbeen so incredible.
I'm very honest with my journeyand I'm not perfect and I
definitely don't writeliterature for the generations.
I write fun in the moment,great stories about normal girls
(04:52):
like us who do great things andfind great men and have these
wonderful, flamboyant lives.
And they all start from nothing.
And they all start from nothingand I think that's what my
readers have resonated with is Idon't write about people you
don't know.
I write about people we know,you know.
(05:13):
So I uploaded my book.
Didn't sell many, but, you know, I had a drive.
Then I had the taste, uploadedmy second book.
You self-published, youself-published, I self-published
, I literally-published.
I just, I literally just ran itthrough an editor program,
uploaded to Amazon myself, right, and then two or three books
(05:33):
and then I wrote a book and itwent.
It was called Dr Stanton thebook and it hit the market.
It made the top 100, top 50 onAmazon.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
What do you think?
What do you attribute that to?
I mean, obviously it was anamazing book, but you know, I
feel like I just got the coverright.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
If you look up Dr Stanton, I got the cover right,
I got the blurb right and I gotthe story right as in.
You know, it's a doctor, it's acouple that you know hook up in
Las Vegas, never see each otheragain, you know, six years
later she turns up and she's hisintern.
She's late, you know, and it'sjust this funny banter, like
(06:18):
it's a great story but it justhit the market.
Anyway, after that, I got anemail this is funny from
Montlake, which is Amazon'spublishing app, and they'd never
signed anybody from Australiabefore Like they don't sign many
people asking me to write forthem, and I thought it was my
(06:39):
husband.
What, like playing a joke on you.
Yeah, so I've written F off.
I know it's you, blah, blah,blah, giving him, like giving
him, because it came from apersonal email, right.
So I was just like you're notfunny, don't annoy me.
Oh, my, I'm cringing for you.
(06:59):
It was Amazon.
Anyway, they've been so amazing.
So, yeah, they took me on.
I've written six books for themand these books that I've just
got now this is.
You know, we're 25 books downthe road.
I've hit number one in everycountry and I'm sold millions
and millions of books, have themost incredible readers, like
(07:22):
they're all become friendsbecause it's like a big girl
gang.
We hang out.
But these books now that I'mreleasing the Miles High, I
actually bought the rights forthese back from Amazon.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
Okay, Taylor Swift.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
So I did this a year ago.
So when she released it she'ddone it I was like, yes, go.
She's got the same idea as me.
So I brought these back fromAmazon and I'm re-releasing them
with my own publishing company.
Now I own a publishing companywith the most incredible staff
you've ever ever met and, yeah,let's go.
(07:57):
So I'm kind of nervous aboutthis, this release, but at the
same time I'm just so proud ofthe full circle that it's been
so.
Speaker 1 (08:08):
the Mile High Club Deluxe Edition is coming out
September 16th.
If you're listening to thiswhile you're driving or if
you're on a walk, don't worry,I'll have it all in the notes
because it's going to be amazing.
But in this Mile High Clubseries, if someone's never read
your books before, which bookwould you say to start with?
Speaker 2 (08:26):
So it's a series of four brothers.
They own the biggest mediacompany in the world.
It's based in New York and it'sabout.
You know, they come from money.
They are these rich, playboy,gorgeous men and they fall in
love with ordinary women andit's just the push and pull and
(08:48):
they're funny and they're sexy.
I write the story that I wantto read.
I want escapism and I want tofeel good when I read.
I don't want to read abouthardships and terrible things
because, let's face it, theworld is pretty horrible right
now.
So I want escapism.
So that's what you get.
(09:10):
That's what you get with mybooks.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
Okay, wait, I want to go back and I'm going to.
But which one do I read first?
The Stopover, the Stopover, theStopover okay.
The Stopover.
Who wants to read it with me?
Dm me, please.
So let me go back T to thestory of the Secret.
How did you even get introducedto the Secret, oh my?
Speaker 2 (09:29):
God.
So this in itself is a freaky.
So I've got a writing group andI think we've got about 1,400,
1,500 girls.
So my very first video was onthe Secret and I tell them the
story about even the way.
I found it was weird.
I was up folding washing onenight at 11 o'clock because and
(09:51):
this is just at this time we hadforeclosures on our house.
Like I was expecting, we were,you know, two months behind on
our bank, like because we eitherlost our house or the business,
and if I lost the house westill had a chance to keep
everything, but if I lost thebusiness, then I couldn't pay
for the house.
(10:11):
You know what I mean.
So it was I'm just like week byweek trying to get through and
I used to clean my house fromtop to bottom every night
because I thought, if tomorrow'sthe day that the sheriff comes
and locks me out of the house, Iwant it to be clean, right,
just anyway.
That makes me cry, but anyway.
So I was folding washing and anOprah special came on.
(10:34):
It was about the secret.
It was at 11 o'clock at night.
You know the Oprah special onthe secret yeah, yeah, yeah, 11
o'clock at night, right.
So I sat on the lounge and I waswatching it and I was like this
, this is this.
It was like she was justtalking to me.
And the next day I went to lookfor this secret book right,
couldn't afford it, but I waslike, damn it, I'm buying this
(10:56):
book.
I just knew that I had to haveit.
And I went to the nearest.
You know, I went from bookstoreto bookstore, to store to
bookstore.
No one had it.
I ended up 45 minutes from myhouse to get this stupid book.
I wasted three hours and I'vegot home and I said to my
husband I found the book that'sgoing to save us.
And he was like God, oh yeahLike, oh, my God.
(11:25):
Here we.
Oh my god, here we go.
At this point we were just kindof humoring each other.
Whatever it took to get usthrough that day, because it was
such a tough time, um, we wouldjust go with it.
Do you know what I mean?
Like if he wanted to watchfootball all night and do
nothing on the that, that thatwas okay, because we were
tiptoeing through life.
Speaker 1 (11:40):
at that point we were in survival mode.
Speaker 2 (11:42):
We were in survival mode, so we just humid each
other.
But here we are, 10 years later.
He's retired, he drives hisdream car, he plays golf three
days a week.
We are just so.
We made it together, thank God.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
This was over 10 years ago, because when I
watched the Secret it was 2006,.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
Before it was on Oprah yeah, so it was 2014 when
I read it.
Okay, yeah, this is when ithappened to me.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
My story was the same , like I was just.
Speaker 2 (12:13):
Really.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
I was in a weird, not happy spot in my life.
I watched the Secret and thenext morning I went on
Craigslist and found my job forHGTV.
It's such a crazy story and Iknow there are a lot of authors
and people who say, like theSecret's BS and all that, and I
just think that they'remisinterpreting what the laws
(12:35):
are.
But I agree with you Like it'schanged my life so much.
So obviously your life'schanged immensely, yeah, and
just in the success that youhave created for yourself, for
your family.
If you could go back and talkto the version of you that
thought that you were going tolose your house, you're losing
(12:56):
your business, you're starting anew career.
Like what would you say to hernow?
You know what?
Speaker 2 (13:01):
I at the time, and I think anyone can relate to this
things just seem so dark thatyou just don't, you can't see it
turning around.
You just can't see the light atthe end of the tunnel.
And the only way I attribute mysuccess is I've always just
(13:22):
believed.
If I find my thoughts turningdark, no, it's like I have to do
a conscious decision to notthink the worst.
I have to think the best and Ihave to bring myself in right
and I even, you know, even tothis day, if I find myself and
you know everybody has a bad dayor things get on top or you're
(13:43):
stressed out, or you feel likeyou're failing, or whatever, I
will have to have that consciousmoment like, stop it, cut this
out.
This is not helping you.
Like, bring your mind back tothe positive and when you're in
this positive mind space,opportunities just present
themselves, but they just don't.
When you're closed off andnegative, it's like you have
(14:04):
this aura of negative and it'slike a force field to keep out
the good things.
Yes, so you need to have thisopen.
Okay, come at me.
Whatever's going to be good,let's go.
Speaker 1 (14:15):
Okay.
So I agree with you a hundredpercent and I also think like a
part of the attracting theopportunities is taking care of
yourself, both mentally andphysically, and when that your
self-esteem rises and then youbring in the more opportunities.
But I'm, I'm and that's why Ithink people think the secret
means you just think goodthoughts and everything.
(14:35):
No, it's way more than that, soit's OT.
When you decided to buy therights back for the Miles High
Club, what was that decisionlike?
Because if somebody that'sscary, this is not only a
financial decision but scary.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Okay, so I'll go back a further step for that.
So I wanted to be in bookstores.
So it's like this convolutedstep that you need to do when
you're an author, when you're anindie author.
They do fantastic.
They outsell every book inbookstores.
They're amazing, right, but weall want movie deals or
television series deals, blah,blah, blah.
(15:15):
To get that, you need to be aNew York seller To make a list.
You want to be a list, New YorkTimes.
This is what the producers arelooking for now and this is what
they're picking from.
You don't qualify for thoselists unless you're in
bookstores, Right, Right?
So this is why indie books,like indie authors, are now
trying to get into stores,because they realize the value
(15:35):
of a list, Even though, let'sface, it's a ridiculous list.
Who cares, right?
But the producers get a biggerbudget for your film if you're
on that stupid list, right?
So that's when I started goingokay, let's work backwards.
I need to be in bookstores.
I started talking to publishingcompanies and the deals that
(15:57):
they were offering were just soridiculously greedy and you know
, they were lifetime deals.
Like who signs a contract for alifetime deal?
But you already had a trackrecord Like you had a speed and
I worked with Amazon, amazon'sdifferent.
Amazon is indie, they're veryforward thinking, they're
fantastic, right.
(16:18):
So I was like I don't want tosign my rights, my year's work,
to greedy publishers.
So we just kind of, like, youknow, trod water for a little
bit and I've got like a reallygreat staff and I was like,
screw this, we're opening ourown publishing company and we're
going to offer authors a betterdeal, like they deserve to be
(16:40):
looked after.
This is not okay.
So we opened our own publishingcompany, which was called
Keeperton.
It's Keeperton because it'sfinders keepers that's what I
love, and you know the staffthat run that.
I don't have anything to dowith that.
We hired, we headhunted staffand they are just so incredible.
The first three books they putout this year, our first three
(17:02):
books, have all hit USA Today.
They're just unbelievable,right?
These girls are all go-gettersand they're all like me and you.
So, yeah, they came to me andsaid we're buying your rights
back.
Let's try and buy your rightsback.
Speaker 1 (17:21):
So I think a lot of people too, like okay, it might
not be writing, but I want to do.
I want to like go and createthis new venture.
You're saying you have thisamazing staff.
That's another part of thepuzzle.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
How did?
Speaker 1 (17:33):
you create or how did you even attract this amazing
support staff for yourself?
Speaker 2 (17:44):
this amazing support staff for you, for yourself.
So I and I think you'll be likethis.
When you've been throughsomething quite dark and you've
come out of it and you've fought, you learn to trust your gut
instincts that you never didbefore.
I toed the line before what Ithought was right and wrong and
now I'm not afraid.
If something doesn't feel right, it's not right, it's
definitely not right.
So my interviewing process ishow I like the person, what they
(18:09):
say in between the questionsthat I ask them.
It's their optimism and theirbelief, or it's not so much in
their natural talent, it's moreabout them as a person.
And you know, skills can betaught.
You can't change who you are.
So I go for optimism andbeautiful people.
(18:32):
We have a policy.
We call it a no-arsesolespolicy.
We don't deal with arsesoles.
We don't deal with agents whoare arsesoles.
We don't deal with authors whoare arsesoles.
No, publishing nothing.
We just don't deal withassholes.
We don't deal with agents whoare assholes.
We don't deal with authors whoare assholes.
No, publishing nothing.
We just don't.
Life is too short to be stuckdealing with horrible people.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
I agree 100%.
So how many books now have youpublished?
25.
25 books you talked about.
You've been pretty open aboutperimenopause and menopause
really derailing your career.
Can you describe a moment thatlike during that time, because
in order to write you have to beable to be in your head and to
(19:13):
be calm, in a sense, and be liketapped in?
So can you sort of like walklisteners through a moment that
you realized something was?
Speaker 2 (19:20):
all.
Well, it's funny, you know,because I went through this
stage.
So I was writing four books ayear because, for me, like I'm
so creative as in, not creativeas wow I can do everything, but
the stories would just keepcoming and I'm like, oh, I could
do this, I could do that,everything's, this, you know,
like everything I didn't haveenough time to do all the things
that I wanted to do and Iliterally woke up one day and my
(19:44):
head was silent and there wasno ideas and I didn't really
care if I worked that day or Ijust might have a day off.
Like I just felt, you know,maybe getting sick or you've had
like a really bad hangover,like you've got a really bad
hangover, you've had two hourssleep and your care factor for
everything is zero.
Like you're just like I'm justfeeding the kids and getting
(20:08):
through the day, Like it's just.
And it went on for a week andthen it was two weeks and then I
was like something's going onwith me here and I'm a really
driven person.
Like I like to work, I like,you know, I like things to
happen.
I just literally didn't care,like I just whatever.
(20:28):
I was, like I was a differentperson.
I went to the doctor.
The doctor told me I hadburnout.
You're too.
You work too hard because youknow it's nothing for me to work
60 or 70 hours a week.
But my work isn't like work tome it's.
You know, my God, I'm gettingto write these stories about
these gorgeous, rich menrescuing women like women
(20:49):
rescuing them.
It's like a really well-paidhobby.
It's like a really super fun,well-paid hobby, like it is not
work.
And the doctor was like you'veburnt out, you need to have a
break.
So I went back to Kelly Kelly's, my right-hand man.
She's been with me for nineyears.
She's like okay, let's schedulea month off.
So we scheduled a month off.
(21:09):
Still the same.
It was just flatlining likenothing happened.
This kept going on.
I'd had every blood test yourthyroid's a little bit out, but
your bloods are all normal.
What the doctors didn't tell mewas my bloods were normal for a
50-year-old woman, which meansyou have no estrogen and they
(21:29):
think that's normal.
It was never presented to methat my lack of drive and my
lack of concentration was to dowith menopause, because I wasn't
having hot flushes.
At the same time, I have gotgirlfriends.
You know, one's having marriageproblems and one's, you know,
fighting with her children thatshe's never fought with.
(21:50):
Another one's having problemswith her neighbor.
Another one's just about tolose her job.
We're all having these with herneighbor.
Another one's just about tolose her job.
We're all having thesecollective problems that have
nothing to do with hot flushes,but what it did have to do with
was the level of our hormonesand how we were reacting to
situations.
So anyway, to put a long storyshort, for two years me and my
(22:12):
girlfriends battled all thesedifferent problems.
I was.
I went from writing four booksa year to one book a year.
Um, and then I was.
It was just so hard and I waslike, okay, yeah, I'm washed up.
I'm one of those washed upauthors now that you that.
You see in the movies.
(22:32):
Yeah, you know the ones thatare crying into the bottle of
wine on the beach because theycan't finish their book.
But in hindsight, the timingwas good, because that's when I
worked in my publishing company.
I wasn't creative, but I wasstill.
You know, I was in Hawaii.
I saw an ad come up for aSuzanne Somers book called A New
Way to Age.
Read it Another game changer.
It talks about bio-identicalhormones and how your body
(22:57):
reacts when you are not, whenyou're depleted in certain
different areas of your life, asin hormones.
I read that and I was like, ohmy God, I am not burnt out.
This is frigging menopause.
It was like a.
Why haven't anyone told me this?
Yeah, menopause, it was like a.
(23:18):
Why haven't anyone told me this?
Yeah, why.
Why has nobody told me thatmenopause is not just hot
flushes, it's concentration,it's drive, it's rage.
It's rage.
It's like care factor of zero.
Like my husband would have likea raging fit and I'd be like
like a raging fit and I'd belike, see ya, who cares Off.
You go bye Like I did not careabout anything.
(23:40):
But I did not attribute that tomenopause because no one talks
about it.
I know, I know.
This is why I'm talking aboutit, because I struggled through
two years where someone had justsaid to me you can have an
organic bioidentical cream thatyou rub on your forearm and you
will find yourself within 24hours.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
What you said, that your words struck me when you
said I felt like an imposter inmy own body, and it's so true I
think you also like calledmenopause the epidemic that
nobody talks about.
It is, it is.
But I mean, don't you think now, with social media at least?
Maybe it's my feed and thealgorithm, but I feel like
people are talking about itright.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
I feel like, yeah, I feel like Halle Berry's really
changed the needle and a few ofthe other actresses that have
come out and started talkingabout it, and I feel like this
is, you know, this is my dutythat I have to talk about it as
well.
This is the reason why I bringit up, because my readers know I
have only released one book ayear for the last three years.
(24:41):
Like I'm on the comeback now.
Then I broke my bloody back,would you believe it?
But my readers know that mywriting has slowed down.
They, you know.
I owe them to tell them thetruth why.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Yeah, which, by the way, T like one book a year.
Okay, let's just be real here.
One book a year is actuallygreat for most, you know, for
everyone.
Speaker 2 (25:06):
But you know, for us, like for me, it's just, it's
not normal.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
Weird, it's not normal.
It's changed your writinghabits.
This journey has changed yourwriting habits, is what you're
saying for sure.
So I'm back, yeah, I'm back now, thank gosh.
If somebody is listening tothis and they feel broken, what
would you?
Speaker 2 (25:25):
say to them Find yourself a holistic doctor,
don't go to a normal GP, go toone that has integrative
medicine and ask forbioidentical hormones.
So there's a difference.
Hrt is made with chemicals.
It is what's been given the badrap.
(25:46):
Bioidentical is made from yamsoybean.
It is an organic kind ofmaterial.
But what I can say in theresearch that I've been doing
myself and I'm not a doctor, soI don't you know.
But 25 years ago HRT was given areally bad rap and it got some
(26:07):
really bad press about causingcancer and causing things.
But what they've found now isnot having estrogen in our body.
Estrogen is what protects usagainst cancer.
Estrogen is what protects ourbrains from dementia and
Alzheimer's.
Estrogen is what protects oursex drive and our body from
(26:29):
aging, even the way you holdweight.
Obviously, when I was goingthrough that terrible period of
my life, the cortisol was sohigh in my body that I put on 30
kilos, about 68 pounds inAmerican.
So then I was not only battlingthat, I had gone from a size
eight to a size 16 overnight.
(26:49):
So not only was I depressed, Iwas like, okay, great, now I'm
overweight as well.
And because my estrogen wasdeclining from that time I had
no chance of losing that weight.
You know I've lost.
Now I've lost a lot of it, butI've still got some to go.
But all I can say is if a manpresented to a GP with low sex
(27:15):
drive drive because, like whocares, that's all that they
worry about they would test andgo oh my God, your testosterone
is low.
Quick, let's give it to youright.
We can go in with life-alteringchanges in our personality.
Oh, you don't have hot flushes,you're fine.
Your bloods are normal For a50-year-old woman.
(27:35):
Our bloods are not normal for ahealthy female.
Our bloods are normal for awoman going through menopause.
There is a difference in thosetwo things.
What the hell.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Don't get me started.
I agree.
I mean I've been on my ownjourney.
I don't, you know, I don'tthink I've found the right
combination yet, and I thinkthat's also frustrating, because
one doctor will tell you onething, another one.
But at least I feel like atleast listening to this, you're
not alone.
Speaker 2 (28:09):
Obviously, you know it is going to take a little bit
for you to find the solutionfor your own body, but you're
not broken, you're not crazy,you're not burnt out, you're
just you know it's hormonal,yeah, and if you're suddenly
fighting with your husband, whoyou've had a great relationship
with for 20 years, and suddenlyhe's the enemy, maybe it is
(28:32):
something to do with ourpersonality.
If you're suddenly fightingwith your neighbors or your kids
or your job or whatever, ifit's a change in your life, go
deeper, look further.
It's not just the other people.
There is a reason we'rechanging.
Like I said, the game changerfor me was reading the book A
New Way to Age, suzanne Somers.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
It explains so much for me, everyone who's listening
.
We have now three books we needto read the Stopover, the
Secret and the New Age.
Speaker 2 (29:01):
That's a lot of books , fun, fun.
The Stopover is the fun one,the other two are medicinal.
Speaker 1 (29:07):
God, I've never given so much homework in one episode
of a podcast before in my life.
Okay, so let's talk about theMile High Club Deluxe Edition
that's coming out Again.
I'm going to link to it.
What made you want to revisitthese stories?
I know you said that you boughtback the rights and this is
releasing a special edition.
So what can readers, what arethey going to get from this new
(29:28):
Deluxe Edition?
Speaker 2 (29:28):
I just wish I had it here to show you.
It is this most beautifulpinkish kind of hue artwork of
New York City Central Park.
It wraps around, it's gotsprayed edges, it's got bonus
scenes.
It starts.
I'll tell you a little bitabout how it starts.
So a girl is at an airport,someone is losing their crap in
(29:50):
the line, giving her crap.
You know they're kicking herbag and she bag and the security
guard feels sorry for her.
So he upgrades her to firstclass.
So she's sitting in first class, looking like she thinks
terrible in her tights andgrungy hair, and this
billionaire walks in and sitsnext to her in his suit.
(30:11):
Anyway, they drink wine and gettalking and there's a lot of
flirting.
And then the plane gets alayover.
It's snow, they can't land inNew York, so they have a layover
and they have this wonderfulnight right the next morning.
He doesn't ask for her number.
She's like, outraged.
(30:32):
They go back to their lives.
So she's an intern.
Years later she gets thisintern.
She doesn't know who he is.
He gives her a fake name.
She gets an internship in NewYork.
She's so excited.
She goes on the tour, gets tothe top level of the building
(30:53):
and those big blue eyes arebehind the desk.
She's like oh my God, so it'syou, so yeah it's fun.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
I know a lot of women listen to like real, like true
crime sort of podcasts and books.
I used to do the same thing.
Trust me, right now we do notneed to listen to anybody
getting murdered, anybodygetting duped Like.
These are the kind of storiesyou should listen to on your
commute to either work or ifyou're doing housework, because
(31:26):
I feel like it's a good way tojust nourish your soul.
And it kind of goes back towhat we were saying in the
beginning of our conversation,like staying high vibe, which
sounds a little woo-woo, butstaying in a positive mindset.
It matters what you listen to,and so if you don't want to
listen to something you know,new thought or something
self-help, you know, loseyourself in a novel like this,
(31:50):
because it just makes you feelbetter and it gives you like a
little bit of joy in your life.
Speaker 2 (32:01):
Yeah, and I feel like you know romance has come a
long way now.
You know it's not the oldbodice ripping, you know cringy
kind of story.
You know these characters arelike sarcastic and smart and
well-educated and they're witty.
And you know you're readingwith a smirk the whole time.
That's the only way I candescribe it.
You read with a smirk becauseit's like watching a really
great show.
I love it.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
Before you go, like what's the message you hope
women and really actually anyonewho's listening can take away
from your story?
Because you have loss, you haveresilience, you have complete
reinvention and you've takencontrol of your life in such an
inspirational way.
Like what's one message youwant to give to readers, or your
readers and my listeners.
Speaker 2 (32:42):
So my readers know my message, but look for your
listeners.
No matter how dark or howbacked into a corner you think
you are, you can turn it around.
It is literally a mindset thing.
If you just change your mindset, you can change your life and
it is I'm proof in the pudding,and every day I get to do this
(33:06):
incredible job and write aboutthese incredible characters with
the most beautiful readers andI'm living this absolute dream
life.
And if someone told me this 14years ago, when I was, you know,
70 pounds heavier, crying in mylounge room at night, every
night, cleaning my house like afrantic, panicked woman because
(33:27):
I didn't want them to lock meout of my house with it being
messy, I would never havebelieved it.
I would never have believed it.
So if I can do it, anyone cando it, because I'm nothing
special.
Speaker 1 (33:39):
Well, you are but T.
Thank you so much.
And how can people find you?
Obviously it'll be in the notes, but how to be and I know
you're huge on TikTok- oh well,yes, but I would love to take
credit for TikTok.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
but my beautiful girls run my TikTok page but
they're fantastic.
But Instagram is where you canfind me.
It's TL Swan.
Author.
I've got private Facebookgroups they're called the Swan
Squad VIP, and I've got awebsite that you can subscribe
to my newsletter.
Speaker 1 (34:11):
So I do Don't forget to get the Mile High Club Deluxe
Edition.
Speaker 2 (34:17):
Yeah, you'll see it in the stores.
It's this beautiful.
The only way I can describe itis and please link a picture of
it.
So it's this beautiful pink,abstracty art version of Central
Park.
You will see it, and it'scalled the stopover.
So I'm just so proud of thisbook.
I I love the characters.
Even when I was reading it, Iwrote some extra bonus scenes
for it so that nobody's readbefore.
(34:38):
Oh good, I read the book backand I was just like, damn, this
is a good book.
How did I do this?
Speaker 1 (34:46):
You're like I'm good, I'm good, thank you.
Speaker 2 (34:51):
Thank you so much for having me.
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