Relationships Made Easy

Learn why your partner defends others instead of validating you, why it hurts so much, how this breaks the goodwill pillar of trust, and exactly how to change this dynamic with actionable scripts and research-backed tools.

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Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/partner-takes-other-peoples-side

Grab 5 Scripts to Get the Emotional Support You Need (Without a Fight): https://abbymedcalf.com/emo...

You know the relationship isn’t healthy. Your friends see it. You feel it. So why can’t you let go?

Maybe you’ve said something like:

• "They’re not perfect, but we have a deep connection."
• "When it’s good, it’s really good."
• "I know I should leave, but I just can’t."

Today we’re diving deep into the neuroscience of trauma bonding: why your brain gets hooked on the highs and lows, what it’s trying to protect you from,...

We’re taught that forgiveness is a mutual thing. That it’s about making amends, talking it through, hugging it out. But the truth, the freeing and maybe painful truth, is that forgiveness isn’t a two-person process. It never has been. Today you’ll learn all about reclaiming forgiveness as something you do for you. You’ll learn the big mistake you’re making when you’re trying to forgive (it’s why it’s been so hard to do before) and ...

In this teaser for Season 8, Abby shares a quick update on what’s changing and what’s staying the same on the Relationships Made Easy podcast. You’ll hear about the exciting launch of her second podcast (Workplace Therapy) and how you can help shape Season 8 by sending in your questions and topic suggestions.

Want to dive deeper? Join Abby’s private online community, The One Love Collective, now on Substack at https://...

If you’ve been wondering whether dating is harder than it used to be, I’m here to tell you: yes. You’re not imagining things. It’s not just that you’re older, pickier, or doomed to attract commitment-phobes. The truth is, dating today has a unique set of challenges, most of which are designed to keep you swiping, second-guessing, and emotionally confused. But don’t panic. Today we’re going to break down why dating feels so hard rig...

You know those moments that make you pause and think, “Wait, am I being ridiculous right now?” You feel off, but you can’t quite explain why. The conversation wasn’t overtly mean. You weren’t screamed at. But still… something felt wrong. Well, you might be experiencing micro-gaslighting. We already know that gaslighting is a form of emotional manipulation meant to distort your sense of reality. But micro-gaslighting is sneakier. It...

If you’ve ever wondered, “Am I doing enough?” at work, in your relationships, as a parent, or just as a person, you’re not alone. So many of my clients feel like they have to prove their value through performance, productivity, or being “good enough” for someone to love or respect them. Today we’ll explore the difference between self-worth and self-esteem, the signs that your sense of worth has become transactional, and five practi...

Nothing makes your stomach drop quite like that moment when you realize your partner isn’t telling you the truth. Whether it's an outright lie, a carefully omitted detail, or that uneasy feeling that they're sidestepping around something important, suspecting deception in your relationship is gut-wrenching. And when gaslighting enters the picture? That's when you start questioning not just them, but your own reality. But here's the...

While judgment can be a natural human response, being judgmental can erode your relationships and seriously hinder your personal growth. Yes, judgment feels good at first. It gives you a hit of certainty, a sense of superiority, and the illusion of control. But over time, it poisons your perspective and isolates you from the very connection you crave. Today we’ll talk about why you judge, the problems it causes, and my 8 steps to h...

You break up with someone and suddenly, every memory is framed as proof that they never really cared. You get into an argument with your mom, and you leave convinced, once again, that she just doesn’t get you. You walk into a work meeting with the story that your boss doesn’t respect you, and now every glance or tone of voice becomes more “evidence.” Sound familiar? That’s confirmation bias, and it’s working hand-in-hand with a set...

It’s not hard to stay calm and open when someone is complimenting your outfit or thanking you for dinner. But when they’re disappointed in you? Hurt by something you said? Frustrated by a mistake you made? That’s when your brain shifts into protect mode. And suddenly, instead of listening, you’re defending, explaining, or withdrawing. Defensiveness is one of the biggest barriers to connection, whether it’s with your partner, your b...

We talk a lot about loneliness these days, but we don’t talk enough about why being alone triggers such deep fear for so many of us. Is it just about relationships? Or is there something deeper, hard-wired into our biology and psychology? Spoiler: it's both. And understanding the roots of this fear is the first step to changing it. If you’ve ever felt that pit in your stomach at the thought of an empty weekend, or stayed in a relat...

Let’s start with a hard truth wrapped in a soft blanket: Yes, food addiction is real, and if you’re struggling with it, you’re not broken, lazy, or weak. You’re human. You’re living in a world where the food industry spends billions engineering snacks to hijack your brain, and your biology is just doing its thing, trying to survive. Today we’ll cover all the research and the “why” of food addiction, and then I’ll give you my five a...

“I’m just putting myself first, is that narcissistic?” “Am I being selfish or setting a boundary?” “I think I might be a narcissist.” Sound familiar? If you’ve asked yourself any of these questions, take a deep breath. You’re probably not a narcissist. But the fact that you're even wondering is worth unpacking, because somewhere between healthy self-love and full-blown Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), things get murky. So l...

In today's fast-paced digital world, the concept of "dopamine detoxing" has gained traction as a method to reset our brains from constant stimulation. But what exactly is dopamine detoxing, and does it hold any scientific merit? Today, we'll delve into the science behind dopamine, debunk the myths surrounding dopamine detoxing, explore how modern motivations hijack your brain's reward system, and then I’ll give you actionable strat...

If you’ve ever felt like your partner shuts down when you ask, “How are you feeling?” or you find yourself saying, “I don’t know what I’m feeling; I just feel off,” you might be dealing with something deeper than emotional avoidance. You might be dealing with alexithymia. No, it’s not a disease. Nobody’s broken. But it’s real, and it affects your relationships, your mental health, and your ability to connect with yourself. Because ...

Ever found yourself knee-deep in a pint of ice cream after a stressful day, convincing yourself that this is "self-care"? (Or is that just me?). Emotional eating is a common (yet sneaky) coping mechanism that many people struggle with. Why do we turn to food when we’re stressed, sad, or even bored? More importantly, how can we break free from the cycle? Today we’re diving into the psychology behind emotional eating, why it’s so har...

If you’re in a relationship where one or both partners are on the autism spectrum, you’ve probably noticed that the usual relationship advice doesn’t quite work for you. You might have read articles, watched videos, or even talked to a therapist, but instead of feeling helpful, that advice often leaves you feeling more frustrated, disconnected, or misunderstood. Here’s why: you’re not just speaking different love languages; you’re ...

Dating should be exciting, filled with curiosity, fun, and a growing sense of connection. But if you’ve struggled with boundaries in the past or found yourself repeatedly in relationships that drain you, you might unknowingly be attracting (or being attracted to) codependent dynamics. Today we’ll break down what codependency looks like in dating, how to spot red flags early (before you’re in too deep), and the subtle ways someone m...