Relationships Made Easy

Relationships Made Easy

What’s the secret to a happy life? The research says it’s your relationships! But how do you create the connection, joy and ease you crave? You’ve got to think about your relationships in a whole new way. Armed with humor, a ton of research and over 30 years of hands-on experience Dr. Abby Medcalf will teach you simple, actionable tools and strategies that you can use today to make all your relationships the best they’ve ever been (including the one with yourself)! Abby’s a Relationship Maven, best-selling author and psychologist, who loves telling you what to do each week on her Relationships Made Easy Podcast. In her free time (what’s that?) Abby’s invested in loving up the people in her life whether that means cooking for them, spending quality time, or trying to control them (hey, she never said she was perfect). Learn more about Abby, sign up for the newsletter, read the blog, listen, take a course, or connect directly at www.abbymedcalf.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episodes

March 18, 2024 38 mins

Adjustment disorders are basically having excessive reactions to some stress (or stressors) in your life that result in overly strong emotions, increased negative thinking and some sort of change in behavior. The key is that the reaction to this event is way more intense than would typically be expected. As you might imagine, this can cause a lot of problems in your relationships, work or school. Today I’ll teach you what adjustmen...

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The vast majority of people find it difficult to talk about money with partners, friends or family. At the root of this issue is something called money shame. To have effective conversations about finances with others, we have to understand money shame and how to overcome it. Today, I’ll not only be discussing money shame, but we’ll also talk about financial incompatibility, the beliefs you have about money that are getting in your...

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I’m not going to keep you in suspense on this one. You know you’re making a “right” decision, or following your “gut,” when you’re acting from the rational part of your brain, not from the fear part of your brain. What I’m going to help you with today is learning the difference between the two and my top five tips for knowing if you’re making the right decision and listening to your gut. 


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Shame doesn’t discriminate. It doesn’t matter if you’re fat or thin, rich or poor, tall or short: shame is an equal opportunity emotion and it’s amazingly destructive. Research has linked it to violence, addiction, depression, sleep problems, eating disorders, bullying and anxiety. But what’s the difference between guilt and shame? And then what the heck is toxic shame? Today I’m answering all your questions and coming at you with ...

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Jealousy in a moment happens when you perceive someone or something else as a threat to your relationship. Retroactive jealousy is different because you feel threatened by something or someone in your partner’s past but there’s no current situation happening that’s triggering this feeling. Today I’m going to talk about the signs of retroactive jealousy, why you act this way and my top five tips for making it stop.

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My name is Abby, and I don’t like Valentine’s Day. There. I said it. But across the US and all around the world, people are celebrating Valentine’s Day either today or on another special date (depending on the country). Today I’m going to share the three steps for having a Valentine’s Day filled with connection, love and joy, whether you’re single or shacked up.

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Full blog and show notes: https://ab...

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February 5, 2024 34 mins

With Valentine’s Day around the corner in about 30 countries around the world, I thought it would be an excellent time to talk about Gary Chapman’s love languages. Let me say first that I’m not a Gary Chapman hater, and I think the Love Languages quiz can be fun and a little informative. However, this is not a one-size-fits-all theory and I’ve definitely found times that it’s even been detrimental for my clients. Today I’m going to...

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I know you’ve heard that curiosity killed the cat, but that negative spin is all wrong! We know from the research that curiosity will help with everything from improving your relationships, to coping better with rejection to feeling happier and more fulfilled in your life. In the last thirty years, we’ve amassed a lot of great research illustrating the benefits of curiosity. In fact, describing a day you felt curious will boost you...

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What do you do when your partner gets along great with their ex and wants to spend all holidays and main events with them and the kids? You’re invited too, of course, but you feel like a third wheel somehow and you’re wondering how to fit in. Do you push your feelings aside for the greater good or draw boundaries around your needs? Today, I’m answering a question from one of you as we figure out the right thing to do.  ____________...

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Here we are with part two of The Five Steps to Having an Empowered Mindset. If you haven’t listened to the first part yet, that’s OK; this one stands on its own (although I encourage you to go back and listen to episode 269). Today we’re going to discuss having a fixed versus a growth mindset and the tips for having a growth mindset, which will lead to feeling strong, confident and empowered.

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An empowered mindset means that you make conscious choices followed by intentional actions to take control of your life. It means you take responsibility for creating the life you want and leave victimhood in the past. But how exactly do you do that? This is a special two-part episode (because I’ve got so much great stuff to share). In today’s episode, I’ll be outlining four of the five steps I want you to take to have a new mindse...

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I’ve said over and over that the secret to a life filled with connection, ease and joy is to create and hold boundaries. And there’s one big thing that generally gets in the way of holding those boundaries: having a victim mentality. In my almost 40 years of experience, working with thousands of people, this is an issue with almost every person I meet. Sometimes it’s a big issue, and sometimes it’s smaller, but it’s almost always t...

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Hello. My name is Abby, and I hate to ask for help. Despite all my years of therapy and teaching others how important it is, asking for help is still something I find difficult to do and I know I’m not alone! Today, I’ll be sharing the reasons why it’s hard to ask for help, the research behind the benefits of doing it and my top three tips for becoming someone who asks and receives.  ____________________________ Full blog and show ...

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The short answer is “yes,” but the real question is, “When should I listen to my relationship doubts and when should I ignore them?” Whether you’re deciding to move in together and having doubts, or you’ve been together for ten years and wondering if it’s time to go your separate ways, relationship doubts can crop up at any point in a relationship. So how do you separate normal doubts from an inner voice you should listen to? Today...

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You’ve tried to draw a boundary with your partner, boss or best friend, but they call you selfish, self-absorbed or even narcissistic! How could dare you prioritize yourself over what they want? In my new book, Boundaries Made Easy (which is dropping in just a couple of weeks on 12/5/23), I dispel the myth that holding a boundary is selfish and explain what healthy selfishness is all about. Today, I’m giving you a sneak peek into w...

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Your current partner is friends with one or more of their past partners or hookups, and you don’t like it. You’ve told them you’re uncomfortable, but they say they’re just friends and you’re overreacting. Does it mean you have to break up? Should you push the issue or just grin and bear it? Today, we’ll be talking about the real reason you’re upset and what you can do about it.  ____________________________

Full blog and show notes...

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How do you not let your family drive you crazy this holiday season? Boundaries. How can you find peace even though there’s so much going on during November and December? Boundaries. How can you enter the new year feeling refreshed and energized? Boundaries once again! If you’re looking for ease and joy this holiday season, I can help you get there, and there’s only one thing you need to focus on (you guessed it), boundaries! Today,...

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Have you been thinking it’s time to call it quits in your relationship, but maybe you’re wondering if you’re quitting too soon or wanting to leave for the wrong reasons? It can be hard to know when a relationship “should be” over. Today I’ll be sharing the top five signs that a relationship might be over.  ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/how-do-you-know-when-a-relationship-is-over W...

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Defense mechanisms are your brain’s (mostly unconscious) way of avoiding conflict, anxiety or upset. Although they get a bad rap, defense mechanisms are a necessary part of your psychology, and some are even considered healthy! Today, you’ll gain some self-awareness as you learn all about defense mechanisms and where you fit.  ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/what-you-need-to-know-abou...

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Do you have that person in your life who, no matter what you do, you can’t seem to get through to them or get them to listen or engage in a healthy conversation about issues you’re experiencing in the relationship? You try to say how you’re feeling, but they flip it back on you and say, “What about my feelings?!” You get sad, but they get even more sad that you’re upset and now you’re taking care of them instead of them taking care...

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