July 28, 2025 • 54 mins
Parenthood is one of life’s greatest challenges and rewards, are you ready for the ride? In episode 800 of the Savage Perspective Podcast, Robert Sikes is joined by his wife, Crystal Sikes, as they pull back the curtain on the raw, real, and powerful journey of childbirth and bringing their second son, Hayzen, home. From navigating the chaos of emergency C-sections and labor complications to mastering sleepless nights with a newborn, Robert and Crystal share five essential tips that any expecting parent needs to know. This episode explores balancing professional growth with family life, the importance of support during labor, and the beauty of embracing the challenges that come with welcoming a new baby into the family. Whether you’re a driven professional or a parent-to-be, this conversation will inspire and prepare you for the most impactful transition in life.
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Chapters:
0:00 Parenthood, Challenges, and Lessons Learned
1:56 Hayzen’s Birth Story and Reflections on Rigel as a Big Brother
5:26 Why an Emergency C-Section Was Necessary and How It Unfolded
10:38 Tip #1: Managing Prodromal Labor and Staying Focused
15:53 Smooth Hospital Admission and Preparing for Labor
20:38 Overcoming Labor Challenges: Pushing, Positions, and Exhaustion
27:48 Tip #2: Staying Calm Through Delivery and Support’s Impact
32:48 Postpartum Recovery: Umbilical Cord, Tears, and Adjustments
37:38 Tip #3: Sleepless Newborn Nights and Navigating SIDS Concerns
42:22 Tip #4: Breastfeeding Triumphs and Embracing Natural Parenting
47:30 Family Adjustments: Handling Sibling Dynamics and Visitors
51:04 Tip #5: VBAC Support and Crystal’s New Partnership
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
We are recording a podcast postpartum with Hazen Wilder
Sykes in your arms. So I didn't want coached
pushing, but because I had a lipand because I had already been
pushing for an hour and a half to two hours, my body was so
exhausted. And then I was fighting my body
to not have to not be pushing and stuff.
(00:20):
So they ended up helping me a lot and it was really helpful.
Like during the contraction, they would say little things to
me and I'm like, you have to keep saying that like because
it's reminding me to, to do thisor to use these muscles.
And that was so helpful. It was just like everything.
It was everything I wanted. He did not come out screeching
like Rigel did, but he was breathing and his skin was going
(00:41):
the right colour. And they they kept saying how
healthy the placenta and the cord looks.
Yeah, they're like, look at thisplacenta.
It is so health. See, I'm like, yeah, that's what
diet does for you. All right, babe, how are you?
Good. Just jumping right in.
We got two really important things.
Talk about 1. Robert's about to make a joke.
(01:01):
We had a baby 02 the the main reason we're talking like the
big the big thing. This is episode 800.
Now let's talk about the baby. The baby's pretty important.
Yeah. So you're feeding that baby you
got. I'm wearing my concealed carry
sweatpants and you're wearing your concealed carry
breastfeeding top. It's pretty cool.
(01:23):
What brand is that? I don't know, got it on Amazon.
It looks like a concealed carry thing for boobs though.
It's like you just have a littleside pocket.
Easy access. I have never had a nursing shirt
before, but I gave in with this child.
He is a hungry hippo, yeah. Because Rigel like you could
just wear like a tank top and like a shirt over and you just
(01:45):
lift the shirt up and the tank top down.
No one really notices. But this one I just said I just
need some new shirts. So went on Amazon or did you
meet some? You're rocking it.
How many did you get? I've seen two at 9 or something.
Get 9. What different colors?
Yeah, they, I mean, they're different shirts.
Like there's tank tops and there's T-shirts and.
(02:06):
We put like screen printed logoson them.
No, I'm just going to leave themplain.
Just going to leave them plain. All right, so we this is, I
guess technically is this the third episode in the series that
we started the 1st? Trimester second, third, 4th.
We did a third. I thought we were going to
bundle the birth and the third together.
(02:27):
I can't remember. This is the fourth.
We just did it. So the last one we recorded, how
many weeks that were you? Do you remember?
I was 40 weeks. OK, that's right.
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah. So you were 40 weeks and he
didn't decide to make his appearance until. 41 and 4. 41
and 4. 41 weeks and four days ifyou don't know what that means.
And now we are recording a podcast postpartum with Hazen
(02:51):
Wilder Sykes in your arms. Yep, he's pretty cute.
He is pretty cute. He popped out looking pretty
cute. Yeah, he sure did.
He was adorable. Yeah.
He almost looked like AC sectionbaby.
Like, you know, C-section babiesare a lot more like fluffier and
they don't have the conehead andlike all the things that that
was him. He looks like a baby version of
(03:12):
Rigel when Rigel was born, because Rigel looked like a 98
year old man version of Rigel when he was born, and he doesn't
look like the young version of him.
Yeah. Yeah, they look a lot alike.
Like as soon as he came out, I was like, whoa, he looks like
Rachel. Yeah.
All right, so let's give people play by play here.
So we did the podcast, 40 weeks,third trimester, and then you
(03:34):
win another week, nothing. Yep.
Pretty much. I did have some things that were
changing and like happening, butnothing like there's no labor
started, yeah. And at that point, you had
pretty much reduced your weight training significantly.
You're doing more stretching. You were doing a whole bunch of
(03:55):
like, spinning babies, all the mobility work.
For all the. Different.
Movements. There's just a bunch of them for
the. It's like they call it the three
sisters. Actually, I don't think they
call it that anymore, but that'swhat it's called where you're
doing like in inversion. In inversion, Yeah.
So like you're like downward dog, but like from your knees.
(04:18):
I don't know what that's called.So you do that for 30 minutes
and then you do. With your knees on like a
cushion or something like a chair.
No, it could just be on the ground.
Yeah. And then that one's kind of
uncomfortable to hold that position.
But then you have the sideliningexaggerated sideline.
(04:38):
So you like lay on your side andyou have your leg hiked up on a
pillow. And then the third one is you
just like go do movement. So like you're doing lunges and
squats and. We're doing some walking and
getting some steps in. Yeah.
And then like curb walking and all that kind of stuff.
So and then that's another thirty minutes.
So it's like 90 minutes of this thing.
(04:58):
But then I was just doing like alot of side lunges, a lot of
stretching, a lot of just like all different kinds of
movements. And he was not moving.
He was not moving. And we were like, your nutrition
was staying consistent. You weren't really adding any
new supplementation. Nothing really new there.
(05:19):
With Rigel, he was in the wrong position, which is why we had to
have the emergency C-section. What?
What was the position again? I can't remember ever.
I can't remember if it's posterior, anterior, posterior.
OK, so face presentation posterior Hazen we felt
confident was head down in the right position, but he hadn't
engaged, meaning his head hadn'tlike gotten the right position
(05:42):
within your pelvis. Yeah, he just, he was like super
low, but he wasn't like in like the birth canal like he was like
he was ready to rock. But a lot of times people, a lot
of times babies, especially second time babies, they
actually won't engage until labor starts like happens so.
(06:04):
And nothing really new happened until July 4th I guess, right?
Yeah. So your sister Heather was in,
her daughter Caroline, who's 9 was in.
Roger was there. You were there pregnant with
Hazen, 4th of July. And we started, we grilled
steaks that night, didn't we? Pretty sure we did.
(06:24):
You guys did. Yeah, so we grilled steaks and
had bought fireworks cause Caroline, poor Caroline, she
never had fireworks before. Like never in legit fireworks.
They live in town in Spokane. And I'm like, man, we live out
in the country. There's firework tents
everywhere. We're going to fix you up,
right? So I took her into town.
We bought 200 bucks worth of fireworks and came back and I'm
(06:46):
kind of, you know, shooting those off with Heather.
But The thing is, just like I told Robert, I was like, we're
going to have a baby. So like, if you're going to get
fireworks, you need to get fireworks now.
If you are, if you are going to make steaks, you need to make
steaks now. Like I kept telling him, like,
do it now I'm getting anxious. And because I knew I was in the
starts of Labor. See, I didn't know that.
(07:06):
I was like you said, we're goingto have a baby.
And I'm like, yeah, I know we'regoing to have a baby.
I mean, it could be today, it could be tomorrow, it could be a
week from now. We're going to have a baby for
sure. But you know.
Robert was not taking my hints and I was pretty much not
hinting. I was like, we're having a baby
like today or tomorrow, like today or tomorrow, we're having
a baby. But yeah, to be fair, you had
been saying that for like the week and a half leading up to
(07:29):
that moment. Well, I but it wasn't like that.
Like I told you, I was like, I'mgetting anxious.
I need you to be home. Like I, I need you to be here.
Hospital bags hadn't been packedon my part yet.
Chris had packed like 3 weeks prior.
Yeah, I had everything packed ready to go by the door and
Robert still hadn't not packed like the two things he needed to
pack. So Crystal is like, I don't want
(07:50):
to shoot fireworks. I want a real estate.
I'm going to just go take a bathand I'm OK, You go take a bath,
except. For he didn't just say I'm going
to go take a bath. I was like, I'm I'm going to go
take a bath. She's in there taking a bath,
and I got the kids wanting to shoot fireworks.
I'm all right. How can I make a compromise here
and do check all the boxes? So I get Heather's phone, put it
(08:12):
on speaker, tried to find the walkie talkies, couldn't find
those. So I put her phone on speaker
next to you in the bath. And then I had the receiving end
outside, and I'm, like, shootingfireworks off with the kids.
You know, loud noises, pop, crackle, snap.
And then the whole time you're in the bathroom just moaning.
Yeah. And I'm like, all right, this is
some good ambiance for the fireworks here.
(08:33):
We got crystal moaning. We got the fireworks popping.
Well, at first they left the sound on so I could hear them
hoop hooting and all are in. And I was like, somebody turn
off your your microphone, like mute yourself.
I don't, I can't be listening toyou guys outside.
Yeah. So we did them and we're
shooting off fireworks. All is well eating steak, happy
(08:55):
go lucky. And then Crystal was like, I'm
going to go move to the bedroom.So I went inside and helped you
move the bedroom. You got on the bed, you're all
situated. And then we keep shooting off
fireworks. It's getting dark at this point.
The kids are catching lightning bugs.
They call them fireflies up north apparently.
And all is well. And then I hear you come on the
speakerphone. You're like, all right, I'm
ready for somebody to come here now.
(09:16):
So then I come in there. Stop shooting fireworks.
And then you wanted me to call the doula, so I called her.
I was like, it was to the point where like at first, so Labour
started at like 4. Like I could tell I was gonna
start Labour really soon. Yeah, but it started at like
4:00 PM. Stakes were down at 5:00.
(09:37):
But it started off really fast. Like that first hour, I couldn't
even catch my breath. Like I felt like my contractions
were like on top of each other. So I'm texting my duel and I'm
like, obviously I'm OK because I'm still texting you.
But I'm like, these are 50 seconds to a minute long.
They're two or three minutes apart.
(09:58):
Like they feel like they're on top of each other.
I don't know if he's in the wrong position.
I don't know, like, because why is it starting so quick, like so
aggressively? And she's like, go relax.
And I think that was part of it is like I hadn't even gotten
into like the I'm in labor, let's chill out.
It was just like I was anxious. I was trying to get everything
(10:19):
done and packed and do all the things.
And then finally when I was ableto relax, I was like, I am full
on in labor right now and. But to be fair, every Duala
meeting we had had up to that point, the Duala kept telling me
she'd look at me and she'd be like, all right, Robert, listen,
there's something called Pro drone.
Pro drama Labor. Drama.
(10:40):
Pro drama Labor. Pro drama labor and she's going
to think she's in labor, she's going to start counting
contractions, she's going to start timing things that could
last forever. And the problem is women get so
excited about that they, they tire themselves out before the
real labor starts. It's like if she starts doing
that, you just like distract her, act like nothing's up or go
mow the yard or something. And I'm like, all right, I got
(11:01):
you. The thing is, Robert doesn't
really need that, because Robertwill just be like, you're fine,
don't worry, you're fine. Roast some dirt on it.
So yeah, that's kind of where myheadspace was.
Like, OK, this is like more intense pro drama labour, right?
We're in. We're in that stage.
So then you had me call the doula or we're laying on the bed
and I'm holding the phone and you're like not even talking to
(11:23):
the doula. And I'm like, I guess I'm
supposed to be talking to the doula right now.
So hey, Doula Jack. She's awesome, by the way.
Yeah, she's so. Awesome.
Crystal can't talk right now, but she wanted me to call you.
I don't know what she wants me to say, but she's just a moaning
over here while we're shooting off fireworks.
And you said something like, yougave her a little bit of
(11:46):
insight. And then I'm like, OK, I think
we're probably on the verge of. Having AI think she heard me
having a couple of contractions.Yeah, that's what it was.
That's what it was. Yeah.
And I told her I'm all right. We'll probably see it some point
tonight, Jack. And then we, that was the end of
that conversation. And then at that point we were
like, OK, what's our game plan? And Roger was still awake and
(12:06):
fired up some. How about this?
How about you go with Heather? So you've got somebody.
I'm going to try and give Roger a shower real quick, get him and
jammies, get him in bed. And ideally he falls asleep that
way he's taken care of. And then I can come back and
focus on you. So I'm kind of doing that whole
bedtime bath time routine, and then Heather walks into the room
and she's like, yeah, Crystal wants to go to the hospital now.
(12:28):
And I'm like. And that The thing is too, is I
wanted Robert to be able to put Rigel down too, because I this
is the first time we'd ever spent this long of a time away
from Rigel. He's never spent the night away
from us. So I wanted him to be able to
fall asleep in his own zone withhis own parents and all the
(12:49):
things. But I so sitting on the toilet
is actually like one of the things that like a labouring
woman, actually it's, it feels the best because your pelvic
floor naturally releases and relaxes when you're in that
position because you're peeing, pooping, doing whatever.
So your body's used to in that position and in that place
(13:10):
relaxing. So actually the toilet is called
the dilation station helps you to dilate because you're able to
completely relax your pelvic floor.
You can let out any pee. You can let whatever.
You're just sitting there. So I was actually sitting on the
toilet and I was like contracting.
And I felt myself like kind of push like, and it wasn't me.
(13:34):
It was like, that's just the wayyour body, like naturally, your
body naturally just pushes your baby out.
And my sister comes into the bathroom.
She's like, you're doing OK. I think I'm pushing.
And she's like, I think you are too.
I just heard you grunt. And I was like, I think I need
to go to the hospital. And like, she could tell that I
was worried because we are an hour and 10 minutes away from
(13:57):
the hospital. And I was just like, I'm I'm,
I'm nervous. And she's like, don't be
nervous. You're going to be just fine.
You're going to make it there. But you need, you should
probably leave like right now. And I was like, I agree.
I should leave, right. I should probably left 30
minutes ago. So that's what happened there.
And then she's like, I'm going to go take care of Rigel.
I'm going to have Robert come inhere.
And. Yeah.
(14:17):
Yeah. So I got everybody loaded up in
the truck, you, me and Hazen andmy stomach.
Yeah. And we start driving, it's like
an hour and 10 minutes like you said in Windy Country Rd.
Back Rd. And you had like had all these
playlists that you had made. We didn't turn that on really at
all. I.
Did I had it on in the bath and in the bathroom?
(14:38):
Like I had it on but it was justreally low.
Yeah, but we start driving and we don't really play any music
while we're driving. I'm just listening to you moan
the whole way and then every bump that we hit, whoa.
So I'm like, all right, this is going to be a new audio track
here, but. We had to take back roads to get
to the main highway and it was pretty rough.
(15:00):
Pretty rough. Yeah, so we get to the hospital
at 11. It was.
Like 11. O five, Yeah, eleven.
O 5 Jack the duel and meets us there.
We're unloading the truck and then you get an all fours in the
parking lot of the hospital and I'm like, I didn't want to have
a baby in the parking lot. Jack's like all right, I think
(15:23):
y'all came at the right time. So we get into the hospital
doors and it is weird. It's like we went to the
emergency room, that's where they told us to go.
And they're probably used to seeing all kinds of riffraff in
there. And like the guy at the counter,
they had to have us go to like ametal detector and like security
and they got the counters like looking at you because you had
(15:44):
gone through 1st and you're likemoaning and like leaning up
against the counter. And he's like, kind of like
looking around, like totally oblivious.
And he just looks up at you withhis big smiles like, and what
are you in for today? The duel is like, like I was
speechless and duel was like, she's having a baby.
So he finally LED us through. The other security guard was
(16:06):
like, she can't even write her name on the paper you take over.
The front, the front office guy was like the one asking the
question. Then the security guard is the
one that was like, hey, man, whydon't you sign in these papers
for her because she's having a hard time getting through it.
Yeah. So you get through that and they
don't really wait very long there.
So that was pretty smooth. We get up to our room.
And yeah, we didn't even have togo through triage or anything.
(16:28):
They just sent me right to laborand delivery.
And like we had they just renovated all those rooms.
We had like a good nice room. They had like a stand up shower.
I mean is ample space for sure is cozy.
So the which? Is kind of cool because that's
the room that we toured yeah andwhen they said that I was like
Oh yes, because I like had envisioned that room so.
So in the room there is one to two nurses at any given point.
(16:50):
There's our midwife, Sarah Beth.There is our doula, Jack.
We had a birth photographer. So I remember we got there two
nurses, Jack, Sarah Beth, photographer.
You and me. Yeah.
OK. And one of the nurses was for me
and one of them was for Hazen. But because I came in like a
push in, they had the baby, the baby nurse there the whole time.
(17:14):
Yeah, and I've never done this before.
So I'm like, are we going to be here for 30 minutes or are we
going to be here for 30 hours? Like, I didn't know what to
expect. So I'm just kind of at your head
trying to comfort you, and they're all at your feet.
And then Sarah bet the midwife'slike, all right, Robert, you
trade places with Jack and you get at her feet because you're
(17:35):
going to be delivering. And I'm OK.
I guess we're moving along pretty quick here.
Let's go through this first. Like when we first get there, I
was at home sitting on the toilet.
I did not even want to get in the car.
That did not sound fun. So when we got there, I
immediately was like, get me on that toilet.
And so I went straight to the bathroom like I don't think I
looked at anyone. I was just like beeline toilet
(17:55):
sat there and then and I really liked that position.
Like the squatting positions. They're like, let's get you off
the toilet. And they had like this blow up
squat thing and that was pretty cool.
And then I eventually, like, slipped off like on purpose, but
it's like came off and they're like, we can do this, but we can
(18:17):
do it on the bed so that you, like, don't slip off.
And so we ended up moving to thebed and we're able to be in that
same position, which I really like was, which was like
squatted. But like the back part of my,
like the upper part of my butt was able to be on the top part
of the bed. And they have a second part of
the bed that like, my feet were able to be down, which was so
(18:37):
cool. Yeah.
And so we're doing all that you're pushing and you, I mean,
you pretty much hit the ground running, pushing and.
We probably got up to the room and stuff at like 11:15 and then
Jack said like I was pretty muchpushing like as soon as I got
into the bathroom. But she's like, you really
started like actively pushing probably around like 11:45.
(19:00):
Yeah. And then you push for probably 2
hours, 2 1/2 hours. Yeah, I think it was like an
hour and a half. Yeah, hour.
And a half and then we hit a roadblock plateau for for a
second there in that first little stint of pushing, like I
saw his head. Yeah, and they were like yelling
baby, baby. Yeah, So I saw his head and I'm
(19:22):
like, I can't tell if he's gotten here.
I can't tell. I can't really tell what I'm
looking at right now. But then there was like no
progress being made for a good little stint.
So they. And I was pushing really hard
and she's like, you're a really efficient pusher.
And so I'm not really sure why he's not coming out.
And I up into this point like my, my midwife is a freaking
(19:43):
bomb. She.
Was pretty impressive. She was amazing.
So with a being AV back, a anesthesiologist and a doctor
have to be in the hospital when I show up and they have to stay
the entire labour. So the doctor was asking and
she's like, like he was asking like, what's she dilated to?
How is progression like what's baby doing?
(20:04):
Like all of these things? Did you guys do an ultrasound?
And she's like, it doesn't matter.
She's pushing. I can see the baby's head like
she like she was just like boom,boom, boom.
And I literally like. Like snapped and she's like,
yes, and I was just like, you are amazing because he didn't
even come in like she this was all being informed through the
(20:26):
nurse because she was just like,we don't need any extra things
happening in this room right now.
Crystal's progressions going great, yada, yada, But I also
didn't really want to be checked.
I also didn't really want to don't to know my dilation.
I didn't. I just wanted to go in and have
my baby and whatever. So she was like, she knew that
and she said at the point that Ihad been pushing for like an
(20:48):
hour and a half and she's like, we can see him.
We can see that he's trying to come down, but he's not fully
coming down. You're really efficient at
pushing. I need to kind of see what's
going on to see if he's in the right position or what's going
on. So then she was like, I'm going
to check you. So she got up there checked.
She's like, he's in a great position, but you have a
(21:09):
cervical lip, so that was preventing him from coming down.
And if you guys don't know, likea cervical lip is part of the
cervix that hasn't dilated back before baby's head really starts
to come down. So his head was pushing on part
of the cervix and it wasn't allowing it to go up anymore.
So if you keep pushing on that piece of the cervix, it will get
(21:32):
inflamed and like swollen. And a lot of times it does send
people into AC section because they can no longer get that lip
to come back. Or you end up getting a epidural
and they usually give you like Benadryl or something to
decrease that swelling and you wait a little while longer to
push and so on. So knowing I didn't want an
(21:55):
epidural, knowing I didn't want AC section, she said we're going
to change you into these positions.
So they had me end up rolling onmy stomach with one of my legs
up for like 20 minutes on that side, then 20 minutes on the
other side, and then was there another one?
I feel like there's three of them.
It was three, I think. I think 1 was it was stomach
(22:17):
sad, sad or back sad sad, but itwas both sides for sure.
It was like 20 minutes, 25 minutes each side or each
position. Yeah, and that was probably the
worst because at this point my body had been pushing on its own
and then I was helping it to push.
So I was obviously having painful contractions and I my
(22:41):
body was pushing, so I was having to fight my body pushing
and get through all these contractions and try to relax
enough for his head to ease off of that cervix.
And she tried to help with that too, like she actually like used
her finger to move it past too Ithink.
At the end, yeah, So we did all those positions and I just kept
(23:03):
saying, can we be done with this?
Like I want to be done with thispart.
I can't. I cannot do this anymore because
it's like I'm fighting my body so much.
I've never had to fight my body so much.
It was weird to watch because it's like you were not actively
pushing, you know, trying to physically, consciously do it.
And it was like you'd almost like doze off in between
(23:24):
contractions. Yeah, I did definitely doze off
a little bit. I do remember like, praying in
that position and just being like, God, you've got to help me
get through this. Like this is exactly everything
I've wanted. Like I, I think I was fearful at
that point because I knew that the having that lip could
prevent me from having him that way, like vaginally.
(23:48):
And I just needed to be calm andlike, get through it.
And nothing was calm after that moment.
But but at least I felt like a little bit of peace about it.
And yeah, so then we ended up being done with that, that
piece. So that was about an hour.
So you pushed hard for like hourand a half, maybe 2 hours.
There's like an hour where you were.
(24:09):
Trying to fight. It pushing but not consciously
pushing. And then after that it was like
PR go time, like everything you got.
So they got this ski handle, like this handlebar thing across
the bed that you were holding onto changing a few different
positions. Then they get this ski rope
handle and they had you pulling against that so you can kind of
(24:29):
like crunch your whole body in while pushing.
And they were like trying to explain what muscles to
contract. And they were like, think of it
like you're doing a lateral raise.
I'm like, no, not a lateral raise.
Think of it like you're doing a row and then.
And that really clicked, yeah. So you.
Started doing like a row and I'mlike I'm useful here.
Yeah. Well, so at this point they had,
(24:51):
they had flipped me back. They said get in whatever
position you want to be in. So I got back into like that
kind of like squatting position.And then she actually ended up
pushing the cervical lip out of the way.
And let me tell you, having someone's hand up there while
you're trying to get your baby out is not 0 fun.
And it hurts because they're pushing this tight lip over the
(25:16):
baby's head. So that was a lot of fun.
But yeah, they had a bar and we,I pulled on the bar for a little
while and then was there something else?
There was the handles like the. Standard, Oh, they had the
handles on the side. Yep.
And then they had like several different things I could put my
feet on. I put my feet on the bar and
then I put my feet on the littlestirrup things and like all
(25:37):
different kinds of things. But yeah, that was really
helpful. You're like like you're doing a
row and that was that was it like that what really helped me
to, to do it and it I felt like,so I didn't want coached
pushing, but because I had a lipand because I had already been
pushing for an hour and a half to two hours, my body was so
(25:59):
exhausted and then I was fighting my body to not have to
not be pushing and stuff. So I had already been doing
things for like 2 1/2 hours veryactively, like aggressively
doing things with my body to tryto get the baby out.
So by this point I was like so tired.
My, my body was very tired. And so I feel like I wasn't as
(26:22):
efficient with the second part where I actually pushed him out.
So it's almost like I needed reminders of like, OK, pull
here, push here, you know, like,so they ended up helping me a
lot. And it was really helpful.
Like during the contraction, they would say little things to
me and I'm like, you have to keep saying that like, because
it's reminding me to, to do thisor to use these muscles.
(26:45):
But then they're like, don't push unless your body feels like
it needs to push. Like we're not going to tell you
push, push, push, push, push. You know, they're just like,
when you feel the urge to push, go for it, you know?
And that was so helpful. And it was just like everything.
It was everything I wanted. It was so awesome.
Because like normally in a hospital setting, like you're
(27:07):
given an epidural, so you can't really feel what your body is
naturally telling you to do as well.
Yeah, you can tell a little bit,but you can't really.
Yeah. And then they typically want you
just laying flat on your back with your knees up.
Right. Yeah, I think that's a little
less common now. I think that hospitals are
(27:27):
realizing that there is actuallysuccess with women doing what
they want to do. But I think more so like being
on the bed is helpful because that way they can they can
actually catch the baby rather than like someone standing or
whatever, which I did not want to stand.
I wanted to stand the beginning of like start of Labor, but then
at the end I was like. Yeah.
(27:48):
Squat me down, I don't want anything else.
So you're pushing, you're pushing, you're pushing.
That pretty much brings us to the Ring of Fire, right?
Yes. What is the Ring of Fire?
We I pushed so stinking hard to get his head through that lip.
I. You were, you were hitting some
(28:08):
PRS for sure. I kept looking over at you
because I'm trying to juggle catching the baby, but then like
comforting you. There's a couple times there
where you were like they offeredlaughing gas and you were kind
of like on the fence. If then you asked me and I'm
like, no, if you do this, you'regoing to look back on this and
regret you took the laughing gas.
(28:29):
So don't take the laughing gas. So that was, but you were kind
of vulnerable at that. Point Yeah, it was I was
vulnerable and I also felt like,I don't know how, how long I
have to keep going. Yeah, like, I don't know, like,
are we almost past the lip? Are we like, where am I at?
And she was just trying to get me to relax enough to like get
through that hard part and you're like, yeah, don't do it.
(28:50):
So I was like, OK, we're not doing it.
Like I kept looking at her because she was obviously
knowledgeable and she didn't seem fazed by anything.
So I'm like, OK, if she's not fazed, if she's cool comic
collected, then I'll be cool comic collected.
So we just kept ripping with that.
And then I, but I kept looking at you several times and like
(29:13):
you were pushing pretty hard. I mean, you had like veins
coming out everywhere doing those rows and I could
definitely tell that you were having it.
You were. You were.
You were not having fun there. My entire body was involved in
getting this baby out. Yeah.
And then so then the Ring of Fire.
So baby's head pops out, Hazen'shead pops out.
(29:36):
So it's it's when like the head is like partly out and well, you
feel the Ring of Fire when the head is coming out.
But he his head was like partly out.
And that is quite literally at the Ring of Fire.
It just burns and it's stretching.
Your skin is stretching at that point.
And he just chills there for like 2 minutes.
(29:56):
Yeah. And you want that stretch to
happen so that you don't tear. So it's like you're trying to
breathe through it. You're like, and they're like,
this is a good stretch. You want to stay here.
It's OK to relax your body. And I was actually able to
relax, like during that time. It took me a minute, but like,
you breathe through it, OK, It'sgoing to be all right.
It feels OK. It's starting to ease off
because it's stretching and it starts to feel a little bit
(30:19):
better and better and better. But yeah, she had to, like, move
that lip out of the way. And I finally got to that point
and I got, I started getting a little nervous at that point
because it hurt really bad all the way around.
Yeah. I thought I had ruptured at that
(30:40):
point. And I looked at my midwife and
she was looking at me and she knew without me saying anything,
she knew exactly what I was thinking.
And I looked at her and I was like, it really hurts.
Like it doesn't feel the same. And it really hurts.
And she's like, you're going to be OK.
And then I saw her eyes wander, like going to the monitor, is
(31:02):
the baby OK? Looking at me like, is she OK?
Is she bleeding? Is she, you know, like all the
things. And she's like, you're OK.
Like she just. We locked eyes and I think we
like locked eyes for like a fullon minute and for her to like,
convince me like, you're OK, this is normal.
You've just never felt this before.
Your baby's coming out right nowand it was like.
(31:24):
Speaking of Hazen the whole time, the whole time his heart
rate was like 138. The most perfect heart rate and
Rigel was the same way. The entire time I was in labor
with Rigel, his heart rate was perfect.
Just cool, calm and collected. Yeah, but Hazen, they kept
saying that they're like, this kid is chill.
Yeah. So at that point, when the
(31:45):
head's hanging out, I'm all right, my time to get involved
here. So I come round back to catch
him and she was like, she didn'tknow which way his shoulders
were positioned. It's like she's got his head,
She's trying to find his shoulders.
But then she's like twisting thehead one way, then the next to
find the shoulders. And I'm like, man, that head's
(32:06):
probably not supposed to do thatis it looks like popping off
here in a second. So she found the shoulders and
then I get into position and then I catch him.
He comes out, we flip him upsidedown so he can exhale, start
breathing. Cough up all the yeah.
Stuff cough up everything at that instant.
There's like blood gushing everywhere.
(32:30):
Then we caught him, I caught him, and then I put him on your
chest. Yeah, you guys had him there for
a minute. I was like, can I have him?
But they were trying to get the stuff out of like out of his
lungs and stuff and. Then as soon as I caught him and
like flipped him upside down, you could hear him like crying
for the first time or squeal or whatever it was he did.
He did not come out screeching like Rigel did.
(32:51):
He came out like. Yeah, it's kind of just like a
cough and then like, like prettychill.
Yeah, but he was breathing and his skin was going the right
color and yeah. So that was pretty cool.
I feel like you just had like this big sigh of relief at that
moment, the moment you heard himand I put him on on you.
And then then we we we couldn't let we couldn't delay cutting
(33:14):
the cord too long because you would torn.
They had to stitch you up and you were bleeding more,
hemorrhaging more, so they triedto push all of the fluid to the
ML cord to him, and then I cut that pretty quickly after he was
born. Yeah, I was bummed about that.
And like I was looking at her doing it.
I was like, do we want this to happen?
And she's like, you're hemorrhaging.
(33:34):
I need to, I need this to, I need to, we need to get the show
on the road. And so I was like, OK, I mean,
whatever we got to do. OK, here we are like let's go.
Cuz you know, when you hear likeyou're bleeding a lot, I need to
stop it. It's like, OK, whatever you got
to do, let's boogie on. And she's like, I'm going to get
him as much blood as he she possibly can.
But there hasn't been a lot of studies on pushing the cord
(33:58):
blood through the cord to the baby like that quickly.
And so I kind of like looked up at Jack and I'm like, is this
what we want? And it was kind of like it was
already happening. And I really wanted him to have
all of his blood. So I'm like, they've done it
enough. I guess we're we're going with
it. This is what we're doing.
So yeah, unfortunately we couldn't wait for it to just
(34:20):
stop pulsing on its own. But he did get all the blood
back because it was, I mean, it was white.
Yeah, and they they kept saying how healthy the placenta and the
cord look. Yeah, the cord was like super
thick. And then they kept saying, like,
they were like looking at the placenta for a while after I had
been stitched up and all that. They're like, look at this
placenta. It is so healthy and like, yeah,
(34:43):
that's what diet does for you. Yeah, so they handed me like
these little toy scissors that Icut the cord with.
I really wanted to use that Obsidian rock that Rigel would
have napped. They wouldn't let me do that,
but it would have been sharper than those scissors they give
me. For sure.
So you got that and then they stitched you up.
(35:03):
I tried to help with that too. I told him I baited mini A fish
and lure, but they wouldn't let me stitch you up.
But they got you all stitched up.
It took a long time. I was not expecting it to take
that long, but she was down there forever.
He was born at 3:30 in the morning and then we'd probably
didn't leave that room until like 445 or five to get to our
(35:25):
main relax for. It was 6 Yeah.
Because well, so she oh and thatwas like the worst.
I don't even know if you were like watching all that was
happening like so she before shestitched me up, she had to push
on like my fundus and like push everything out.
Like put all I felt was the insane amount of liquid coming
(35:49):
out of my body. It was like a ton and it was
like blood and urine and all of the all of the things.
And so she was pushing it out because I was bleeding.
She was pushing it out and I like looked at her and she's
like it's OK. So it is a lot.
It's OK. Like freaking.
Out 'cause they have like this bag thing that they put there
(36:12):
like a little kangaroo patch on it that's designed to catch all
the blood and I guess the baby if you drop the baby.
But they said that it normally it's got like measuring dashes
on it and they said that it's typical to have like 500 mils
and I think you were like 700 mils or something.
Which is still less than like anaverage loss in AC section, but
(36:34):
yeah, she's like it's mixed in with a urine and stuff.
So I'm going to guess it was about 700 and you know,
whatever. And but it felt crazy, like it
felt like the crazy amount coming out.
But anywho. Yeah, so I got you all stitched
up. And I, I only had a one like a
first degree tear, so that actually wasn't bad at all.
(36:56):
I did have a couple of just likelittle lacerations which
actually took longer to heal, but we decided to leave those
and let those heal naturally. And then the first degree tear
we sewed. Yeah, and we wheeled ourselves
back to the chill room, whateverthey call that.
And then? Postpartum.
Yeah. And then we were there.
(37:17):
So we got there like 6, I guess,and then we left.
That would have been six Saturday morning and then we got
checked out at noon on Sunday. And then we were just pretty
much there the whole that whole time.
Not really sleeping because theydon't want you to sleep with the
baby for SIDS. Sudden sudden infant death
syndrome. Yeah, well, they just don't want
(37:38):
you to like, drop the baby. Yeah, so we don't really want to
not be with the baby. So like you would hold them and
sleep while I was laying awake? Thing that they have.
Like I wouldn't want to lay in that plastic thing after being
in my mom's womb for 10 months. Yeah, so we pretty much like
stayed awake. We didn't sleep at all Saturday,
basically. Yeah, we didn't sleep.
(37:58):
So because I had them 3:30 in the morning, so we didn't sleep
that whole night. And then you're just high on
baby vibes that you're like, I'mnot sleeping.
So we ordered coffee or breakfast or both.
Oh, no, Heather. We're going to, Yeah.
She brought us coffee. We're going to order.
We were going to just see what they had to eat at the
(38:18):
cafeteria. And I walked down there and I,
like, walked around and I'm like, there's nothing here.
So I walked right back up and then let's just order a coffee.
And. And then somebody said you can
make an omelet and the cafeteriastomach because I wanted
something hot. You wanted something hot to eat
and OK, go get us an omelet and made you an omelet.
They're like using oils. I'm like, don't use the oils.
(38:40):
And then they were like, I'm like, can I just get a dozen
eggs scrambled up and they went and grabbed A carton to pour my
eggs in and I'm like, I want eggs cracked.
They didn't have those. So yeah, the hospital foods
lackluster for sure. They brought us a few things,
but it was all like oatmeal and.Yeah, they brought us meals
without me actually asking. And then I felt bad because I
(39:00):
wasted food, even though it's food we don't eat.
Like I felt bad for still wasting it.
And they would come and pick it up and they would like, is this
girl eating? I'm like, yes, we just ordered
different foods. Shout out to keto bricks, man
bars, carnivore bars, cheese puffs.
We had, we had like all those moon cheese.
Yeah, moon cheese, Yeah. So I ate a bunch of that and
(39:22):
then just snuggle with hazing. And then Rigel and Heather came
with Caroline. That was Saturday around noon.
Yeah. Yeah, so they came.
Yeah, I think it was. Roger got some meters.
Yeah, brother, which was pretty cool.
We had like got this little backpack with some goodies in it
that we told Roger was from Hazen, so he was all excited and
he was like jumping up on the bed, hugging him and kissing
(39:43):
him. That was pretty.
Cute. Yeah, Robert went down and got
Rigel so he can come in by himself, like with just the four
of us, and we had our photographer come back and she
took pictures like of us all, like being together when.
Did we get those photos? Yesterday.
You got him already. Yeah, I haven't looked at him
yet because we were busy all dayyesterday, but I haven't looked
(40:05):
at him, so yeah. They're almost there on the big
screen. Yeah.
So yeah, I'm excited to see. Those I don't know, I was like,
I had actually, I had purchased a gown that opens from like all
sides so that if they did have to do an emergency surgery, if
they needed to get in the back, if they need to get in the front
or whatever, like it looks like a hospital gown, but it was like
(40:28):
I bought an all black one. It was one of my own, like I
could wash it. I purchased that to wear and
then we got there and I was justlike, I wore no clothes the
whole time. I was just like and so I don't
know how many of the pictures wecan share.
There's definitely something that you probably wouldn't want.
To share, there's definitely ones I would not want to share.
Yeah, but. Definitely some.
(40:49):
But there's, it's, I think it's going to be hard to like find
exactly. I posted one like on our
announcement and I, I called Robert immediately.
I was like, can you go look at the post that I just made?
I 'cause I am so like in love with like all things birth that
like I watch birth videos and I follow a lot of these pages that
(41:10):
like post just like people having babies and stuff and
people are not wearing clothes. So I in my head it's like, OK,
if I just like cover my nipples,I'll be OK.
And then I realized after posting it, I was like, no, like
all of these people are going tosee it.
And it's like called rower. I was like, is this OK?
Should I take it down? And he's like, Nah, I think it's
(41:32):
fine. And I'm like, my hope was that
everyone was looking at Hazen's face anyways and not me.
Well, I I gave because we tried to vlog it, because we had, We
haven't been really good about vlogging, but we've vlogged
Rigel's bursts. We tried to.
I've blogged this one too. And then I gave chip the SD
card. Was there some nipple picks in
that chip on the? Pictures, yes.
(41:54):
So Chip knows what your nipples look like.
You know it's fine, Chip. I'm a man, that's what.
He said it wasn't sexual. Yeah, there was a TV there.
Yeah, that's. Hilarious.
Yeah. We're all one big family here at
Keto Rick Company. You know, well, and I knew with
(42:14):
like this being what we were doing that that was that's
likely to happen, you know, likewith the pictures and stuff
being on there so. It's weird that like, like birth
is not a sexualized thing. Nipples and breastfeeding are
pretty much go hand in hand withbirth.
Yeah. And modern society just like,
(42:35):
takes things out of context, youknow?
Like, you wouldn't think it's weird watching a wild animal
breastfeeding A pup or somethinglike that, you know?
So who knows? But yeah, we have a Hazen now
and he's just as cute as he can be.
He is, is is it? It'll be interesting to see how
he is different than Rigel as hegrows.
(42:56):
But I don't remember Rigel beingthis boob hungry.
Nope. Like he is latched or crying one
of the other. He's crying because he wants
milk or he is on me. I'll all the.
Time if I'm holding them, he'll either sleep, he'll be sleeping,
but if he's not sleeping and like wanting a boob, I obviously
(43:16):
can't help him there, but I I'llput my finger in his mouth head
just like go for it, he'll be there.
He is like a. Shark finger for 30 minutes.
Yeah. And it just like just crazy.
I'm like, you are like a shark right now.
It's it's nuts sleeping but rolling his eyes back.
Yeah, so feeling very blessed for sure, very grateful.
(43:38):
Everything went smoothly and then.
You know, it's kind of weird is like talking about the birth
because it's obviously I was going through all that to bring
a child into this world, but nowlike spending as much time with
him. Like you were there the whole
time, you know, like you were there doing the things, doing
your part inside the whole time.And it just kind of crazy
(44:01):
because now I know him, you know, It's like now I know you
and you were, you were the one Iwas working so hard for, you
know? It's so cool.
By far the hardest thing I've ever done.
Yeah, by far hardest thing I've ever done.
It's cool. I'm proud of you, babe.
So worth it. But the bummer, the bummer is
that like Robert and I both said, like I would have pushed
him out no prob. He probably would have been out
(44:23):
by 1:30 had I not had that lip. Yeah, but because I did, we went
another couple hours, but I think I would have had no
problem. Just like.
Yeah, had we not had bad and we didn't have that like
intermission period, like I feellike you would have looked back
on that, but I mean, I wouldn't too bad easy.
Yeah. So yeah, that definitely.
(44:46):
But you, you just got some more savage points with that little
hurdle, you know, and. I do think I mean I have like
the happy go lucky feelings and stuff, but for me personally, I
do not think laboring naturally like without medication was that
(45:06):
bad. Like yes, you were.
I was breathing through moaning.Some things are really
uncomfortable. There was times where my back
hurt really bad. There was times where you know,
like, yes, but ultimately I lookback and I'm like, that was not
as bad as I thought it was goingto be.
You know, I think the hardest part actually, even the in the
(45:28):
beginning pushing was not that bad.
Like I don't think it was that bad.
And pushing actually kind of gave a little bit of like
relief. But the end part was the hardest
trying to get past that lip and that was the most exhausting.
I think that was the hardest part, hardest thing I've ever
done because I think before thatit was like, this is hard, This
(45:49):
is like some work, but I didn't feel like this is the worst
until I really got to the end and then I was like, this is the
worst. Yeah, I mean, had that not been
there and he'd come out with that first run of pushing, like
I was watching the whole time and you didn't seem to be like
dismayed at all. Like you seemed like you were
(46:10):
going strong, just rocking it, you know?
Yep, and there was times of likehappy smiling, you know,
whatever through the labour of the pushing the whatever until
the end. And then I was just like, I am
literally like falling asleep orlike my eyes rolling back in my
head or whatever during that last bit.
(46:31):
And how old is he now? He's so he's born on the 5th.
Two week tomorrow he'll be two weeks.
Tomorrow he'll be two weeks. Yeah, today's Friday and we're
super happy, super grateful, super blessed, super thankful.
All the things that we had hopedfor.
We just got back from Oklahoma yesterday.
We took newborn pictures with him and then the family pictures
(46:53):
in. Oklahoma, it's like right over
the border, but it was in Tulsa.So that'll be good.
And Roger's so far being an awesome Big Brother, like I've
been pretty pleased. Like he doesn't seem jealous.
I mean, there's definitely some changes, but he doesn't seem
like he doesn't seem put off at all.
(47:13):
Yeah, he, I can tell that he definitely has feelings.
Like even last night, like he wanted me and I tried so hard to
just like, give him as much of me as I could.
But there was a certain point itwas like, we've got to go
different ways because like I have to take care of Hazen.
And you were there. I mean, it wasn't like, it
(47:35):
wasn't like. But then as soon as I started
reading his book, he'd chill it out.
It was totally fine. Yeah, he was just a little
emotional. Any anyways, he was just late.
But I feel like when it's just been the four of us or me and
the two boys, it's been pretty chill.
It's more so when people are visiting that he's crazy.
Like when Heather was here, he was a little hyperactive.
(47:58):
When your parents were here, little hyperactive.
My dad's here, little hyperactive.
Like he's just like trying to get attention and he's just
getting into like mischief. And I feel like that has a bit
to do with Hazen because he's always been like, not always,
(48:18):
but he's more recently been moreexcitable and kind of getting
into himself into mischief and just not listening and you know,
normal, typical 3 year old things.
But I think it's amplified when someone else is in from out of
town for sure visiting. So I, it's so helpful that
people are here, but it's also makes it a little bit more
(48:40):
challenging with Rigel and I don't want to get on to him.
You know, it's like, I don't want to get on to you.
I want us to be like snuggling and happy and playful and all of
that. But now I feel like I'm having
to get on to you because you're being a little extra because
other people are here. So it's almost like, I don't
know if it's going to be easier or harder because like other
people are doing things to be helpful, like cooking, cleaning,
(49:04):
like all of that, playing with him, taking him out, doing
whatever. But it also is making it more
challenging to parent him. So it's, it's been the
interesting balance of all of the things and, and healing.
I actually think this birth was harder for me to heal than my
(49:25):
C-section. But my midwife kind of warned
me. She's like, you have a lot of
swelling, but probably just because I had to really push
through that. She said you had a lot of
swelling, a little tear, you know, like just take it easy.
You feel like you're healing up good though.
I do, but like after yesterday, we had such a long day yesterday
I was hurting and I think I likekind of triggered my body to
(49:52):
like bleed a little bit more andjust because I was going, you
know, and it's like I just had ababy two weeks ago and you
think, oh, you had a baby two weeks ago?
Like that's a pretty good healing time.
It's really not like a lot of people do the 555.
It's like 5 days in the bed, 5 days on the bed, 5 days around
the bed. So this would have been like the
(50:13):
last bed of like maybe I have another day or two of like
around the bed and I have been doing all of the things.
So I feel like I've I am healing.
I'm hoping that I'm not doing mybody any bad for how active I've
been, but I've also been trying to rest like when Rigel naps, I
lay down the whole time. I don't try to get up and clean
(50:35):
the house or do whatever. Me and haze and we we all three
nap together And so that's for acouple hours and then I sleep
all night long. You know, like I try to like
rest when it's rest time, I try to just lay down.
But when it's the daytime, it's even just sitting in a chair,
like a hard chair, a hard surface is 0% fun.
(50:57):
But like even on the couch, it'sjust like the gravity is still
pulling down. And so it's like really, unless
I'm laying, does that feel good?Like I said, at the end of the
day, I'm just like, thank goodness my body can finally
rest. So I don't know.
I think it's just different because we have a little person
to run after now and we're busy people and there's just a lot
(51:19):
going on. It's just, it is what it is.
If in the imperfect world you could have all of that time,
that's wonderful for you. But we're busy people.
Give me this lunch. We've got lives to live here.
(51:42):
All right. Is there anything else we want
to add to this podcast? Oh my, no, I don't think so.
I mean, I'm sure we're going to get off of here and I'm be like,
oh, I should have said this. Oh I should have said that, but
if anyone is looking to have AV back or whatever, even if you're
like a first time parent or justwant to hear more birth stories,
(52:04):
more information about birth, things like that.
This one is specifically for V backs, but it is for everyone
because it shares a lot of different stories.
I have been addicted to the V back link.
It's a podcast and they have an awesome Facebook group.
(52:24):
Like it's very positive. If there is negativity, they
like immediately remove it and things like that.
So that was really helpful for me since Rigel's birth because I
had a really hard time processing Rigel's birth and
just listening to those stories,listening to other people who
have gone through similar situations and wanting AV back.
And then maybe they had a repeatC-section or maybe they did have
(52:47):
a successful V back or maybe they had a successful home birth
V back. And yeah, so I would highly
recommend the V back link. That was a huge thing for me.
Very encouraging. And then I'm also happy to talk
with people too, if people. And there was like several
people who would like watch on Instagram, they're like, I can't
(53:07):
wait to hear how it goes. And like, I'm so curious.
I'm hoping for mine too or I just had to be back or whatever
like it doesn't. Seem what is Jack's socials
again like? Shout out to Jack or Doula.
So she is actually ending with this company or their their
partnership separating, separating out this partnership
and then she's going into a partnership with someone else.
(53:29):
So right now it's the natural state doulas and they should be
linking out to what she's going to be changing into next.
But. Jenna had to say her Beth, her
midwife. Yeah, she was amazing.
Yeah, she was. Everyone was amazing.
It literally went as perfectly as it could have.
Like, it was awesome. The people were awesome.
(53:50):
My nurse was absolutely fantastic.
They for V backs, they require continuous monitoring.
They like continuous monitoring for everyone.
But as a V back, you can't really opt out.
But this nurse, she held on thatmonitor the entire time like she
they did not strap them on to me.
She let me change positions and then she would find a spot and
(54:12):
then she'd stay there and if I was uncomfortable, she'd let me
move again. Like she and she did not even
talk to me. She just was like following my
vibes, following my moves, doingall the things and like then
checking out his heart rate and then like holding it there.
She was just amazing. She was so amazing.
Solid team for sure. Yeah, everyone was so awesome.
(54:32):
Proud of you babe, I love you. Thanks, love you too.
Proud of you Hazen. You got anything to end the mic?
Nothing. He just pooped, so I guess
you're holding him now. All right, Joe, I'm going to go
change a diaper. Love you babe.
Love you too. Till next time, y'all ta ta.
We are recording a podcast postpartum with Hazen Wilder
Sykes in your arms. So I didn't want coached
pushing, but because I had a lipand because I had already been
pushing for an hour and a half to two hours, my body was so
exhausted. And then I was fighting my body
to not have to not be pushing and stuff.
(00:20):
So they ended up helping me a lot and it was really helpful.
Like during the contraction, they would say little things to
me and I'm like, you have to keep saying that like because
it's reminding me to, to do thisor to use these muscles.
And that was so helpful. It was just like everything.
It was everything I wanted. He did not come out screeching
like Rigel did, but he was breathing and his skin was going
(00:41):
the right colour. And they they kept saying how
healthy the placenta and the cord looks.
Yeah, they're like, look at thisplacenta.
It is so health. See, I'm like, yeah, that's what
diet does for you. All right, babe, how are you?
Good. Just jumping right in.
We got two really important things.
Talk about 1. Robert's about to make a joke.
(01:01):
We had a baby 02 the the main reason we're talking like the
big the big thing. This is episode 800.
Now let's talk about the baby. The baby's pretty important.
Yeah. So you're feeding that baby you
got. I'm wearing my concealed carry
sweatpants and you're wearing your concealed carry
breastfeeding top. It's pretty cool.
(01:23):
What brand is that? I don't know, got it on Amazon.
It looks like a concealed carry thing for boobs though.
It's like you just have a littleside pocket.
Easy access. I have never had a nursing shirt
before, but I gave in with this child.
He is a hungry hippo, yeah. Because Rigel like you could
just wear like a tank top and like a shirt over and you just
(01:45):
lift the shirt up and the tank top down.
No one really notices. But this one I just said I just
need some new shirts. So went on Amazon or did you
meet some? You're rocking it.
How many did you get? I've seen two at 9 or something.
Get 9. What different colors?
Yeah, they, I mean, they're different shirts.
Like there's tank tops and there's T-shirts and.
(02:06):
We put like screen printed logoson them.
No, I'm just going to leave themplain.
Just going to leave them plain. All right, so we this is, I
guess technically is this the third episode in the series that
we started the 1st? Trimester second, third, 4th.
We did a third. I thought we were going to
bundle the birth and the third together.
(02:27):
I can't remember. This is the fourth.
We just did it. So the last one we recorded, how
many weeks that were you? Do you remember?
I was 40 weeks. OK, that's right.
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah. So you were 40 weeks and he
didn't decide to make his appearance until. 41 and 4. 41
and 4. 41 weeks and four days ifyou don't know what that means.
And now we are recording a podcast postpartum with Hazen
(02:51):
Wilder Sykes in your arms. Yep, he's pretty cute.
He is pretty cute. He popped out looking pretty
cute. Yeah, he sure did.
He was adorable. Yeah.
He almost looked like AC sectionbaby.
Like, you know, C-section babiesare a lot more like fluffier and
they don't have the conehead andlike all the things that that
was him. He looks like a baby version of
(03:12):
Rigel when Rigel was born, because Rigel looked like a 98
year old man version of Rigel when he was born, and he doesn't
look like the young version of him.
Yeah. Yeah, they look a lot alike.
Like as soon as he came out, I was like, whoa, he looks like
Rachel. Yeah.
All right, so let's give people play by play here.
So we did the podcast, 40 weeks,third trimester, and then you
(03:34):
win another week, nothing. Yep.
Pretty much. I did have some things that were
changing and like happening, butnothing like there's no labor
started, yeah. And at that point, you had
pretty much reduced your weight training significantly.
You're doing more stretching. You were doing a whole bunch of
(03:55):
like, spinning babies, all the mobility work.
For all the. Different.
Movements. There's just a bunch of them for
the. It's like they call it the three
sisters. Actually, I don't think they
call it that anymore, but that'swhat it's called where you're
doing like in inversion. In inversion, Yeah.
So like you're like downward dog, but like from your knees.
(04:18):
I don't know what that's called.So you do that for 30 minutes
and then you do. With your knees on like a
cushion or something like a chair.
No, it could just be on the ground.
Yeah. And then that one's kind of
uncomfortable to hold that position.
But then you have the sideliningexaggerated sideline.
(04:38):
So you like lay on your side andyou have your leg hiked up on a
pillow. And then the third one is you
just like go do movement. So like you're doing lunges and
squats and. We're doing some walking and
getting some steps in. Yeah.
And then like curb walking and all that kind of stuff.
So and then that's another thirty minutes.
So it's like 90 minutes of this thing.
(04:58):
But then I was just doing like alot of side lunges, a lot of
stretching, a lot of just like all different kinds of
movements. And he was not moving.
He was not moving. And we were like, your nutrition
was staying consistent. You weren't really adding any
new supplementation. Nothing really new there.
(05:19):
With Rigel, he was in the wrong position, which is why we had to
have the emergency C-section. What?
What was the position again? I can't remember ever.
I can't remember if it's posterior, anterior, posterior.
OK, so face presentation posterior Hazen we felt
confident was head down in the right position, but he hadn't
engaged, meaning his head hadn'tlike gotten the right position
(05:42):
within your pelvis. Yeah, he just, he was like super
low, but he wasn't like in like the birth canal like he was like
he was ready to rock. But a lot of times people, a lot
of times babies, especially second time babies, they
actually won't engage until labor starts like happens so.
(06:04):
And nothing really new happened until July 4th I guess, right?
Yeah. So your sister Heather was in,
her daughter Caroline, who's 9 was in.
Roger was there. You were there pregnant with
Hazen, 4th of July. And we started, we grilled
steaks that night, didn't we? Pretty sure we did.
(06:24):
You guys did. Yeah, so we grilled steaks and
had bought fireworks cause Caroline, poor Caroline, she
never had fireworks before. Like never in legit fireworks.
They live in town in Spokane. And I'm like, man, we live out
in the country. There's firework tents
everywhere. We're going to fix you up,
right? So I took her into town.
We bought 200 bucks worth of fireworks and came back and I'm
(06:46):
kind of, you know, shooting those off with Heather.
But The thing is, just like I told Robert, I was like, we're
going to have a baby. So like, if you're going to get
fireworks, you need to get fireworks now.
If you are, if you are going to make steaks, you need to make
steaks now. Like I kept telling him, like,
do it now I'm getting anxious. And because I knew I was in the
starts of Labor. See, I didn't know that.
(07:06):
I was like you said, we're goingto have a baby.
And I'm like, yeah, I know we'regoing to have a baby.
I mean, it could be today, it could be tomorrow, it could be a
week from now. We're going to have a baby for
sure. But you know.
Robert was not taking my hints and I was pretty much not
hinting. I was like, we're having a baby
like today or tomorrow, like today or tomorrow, we're having
a baby. But yeah, to be fair, you had
been saying that for like the week and a half leading up to
(07:29):
that moment. Well, I but it wasn't like that.
Like I told you, I was like, I'mgetting anxious.
I need you to be home. Like I, I need you to be here.
Hospital bags hadn't been packedon my part yet.
Chris had packed like 3 weeks prior.
Yeah, I had everything packed ready to go by the door and
Robert still hadn't not packed like the two things he needed to
pack. So Crystal is like, I don't want
(07:50):
to shoot fireworks. I want a real estate.
I'm going to just go take a bathand I'm OK, You go take a bath,
except. For he didn't just say I'm going
to go take a bath. I was like, I'm I'm going to go
take a bath. She's in there taking a bath,
and I got the kids wanting to shoot fireworks.
I'm all right. How can I make a compromise here
and do check all the boxes? So I get Heather's phone, put it
(08:12):
on speaker, tried to find the walkie talkies, couldn't find
those. So I put her phone on speaker
next to you in the bath. And then I had the receiving end
outside, and I'm, like, shootingfireworks off with the kids.
You know, loud noises, pop, crackle, snap.
And then the whole time you're in the bathroom just moaning.
Yeah. And I'm like, all right, this is
some good ambiance for the fireworks here.
(08:33):
We got crystal moaning. We got the fireworks popping.
Well, at first they left the sound on so I could hear them
hoop hooting and all are in. And I was like, somebody turn
off your your microphone, like mute yourself.
I don't, I can't be listening toyou guys outside.
Yeah. So we did them and we're
shooting off fireworks. All is well eating steak, happy
(08:55):
go lucky. And then Crystal was like, I'm
going to go move to the bedroom.So I went inside and helped you
move the bedroom. You got on the bed, you're all
situated. And then we keep shooting off
fireworks. It's getting dark at this point.
The kids are catching lightning bugs.
They call them fireflies up north apparently.
And all is well. And then I hear you come on the
speakerphone. You're like, all right, I'm
ready for somebody to come here now.
(09:16):
So then I come in there. Stop shooting fireworks.
And then you wanted me to call the doula, so I called her.
I was like, it was to the point where like at first, so Labour
started at like 4. Like I could tell I was gonna
start Labour really soon. Yeah, but it started at like
4:00 PM. Stakes were down at 5:00.
(09:37):
But it started off really fast. Like that first hour, I couldn't
even catch my breath. Like I felt like my contractions
were like on top of each other. So I'm texting my duel and I'm
like, obviously I'm OK because I'm still texting you.
But I'm like, these are 50 seconds to a minute long.
They're two or three minutes apart.
(09:58):
Like they feel like they're on top of each other.
I don't know if he's in the wrong position.
I don't know, like, because why is it starting so quick, like so
aggressively? And she's like, go relax.
And I think that was part of it is like I hadn't even gotten
into like the I'm in labor, let's chill out.
It was just like I was anxious. I was trying to get everything
(10:19):
done and packed and do all the things.
And then finally when I was ableto relax, I was like, I am full
on in labor right now and. But to be fair, every Duala
meeting we had had up to that point, the Duala kept telling me
she'd look at me and she'd be like, all right, Robert, listen,
there's something called Pro drone.
Pro drama Labor. Drama.
(10:40):
Pro drama Labor. Pro drama labor and she's going
to think she's in labor, she's going to start counting
contractions, she's going to start timing things that could
last forever. And the problem is women get so
excited about that they, they tire themselves out before the
real labor starts. It's like if she starts doing
that, you just like distract her, act like nothing's up or go
mow the yard or something. And I'm like, all right, I got
(11:01):
you. The thing is, Robert doesn't
really need that, because Robertwill just be like, you're fine,
don't worry, you're fine. Roast some dirt on it.
So yeah, that's kind of where myheadspace was.
Like, OK, this is like more intense pro drama labour, right?
We're in. We're in that stage.
So then you had me call the doula or we're laying on the bed
and I'm holding the phone and you're like not even talking to
(11:23):
the doula. And I'm like, I guess I'm
supposed to be talking to the doula right now.
So hey, Doula Jack. She's awesome, by the way.
Yeah, she's so. Awesome.
Crystal can't talk right now, but she wanted me to call you.
I don't know what she wants me to say, but she's just a moaning
over here while we're shooting off fireworks.
And you said something like, yougave her a little bit of
(11:46):
insight. And then I'm like, OK, I think
we're probably on the verge of. Having AI think she heard me
having a couple of contractions.Yeah, that's what it was.
That's what it was. Yeah.
And I told her I'm all right. We'll probably see it some point
tonight, Jack. And then we, that was the end of
that conversation. And then at that point we were
like, OK, what's our game plan? And Roger was still awake and
(12:06):
fired up some. How about this?
How about you go with Heather? So you've got somebody.
I'm going to try and give Roger a shower real quick, get him and
jammies, get him in bed. And ideally he falls asleep that
way he's taken care of. And then I can come back and
focus on you. So I'm kind of doing that whole
bedtime bath time routine, and then Heather walks into the room
and she's like, yeah, Crystal wants to go to the hospital now.
(12:28):
And I'm like. And that The thing is too, is I
wanted Robert to be able to put Rigel down too, because I this
is the first time we'd ever spent this long of a time away
from Rigel. He's never spent the night away
from us. So I wanted him to be able to
fall asleep in his own zone withhis own parents and all the
(12:49):
things. But I so sitting on the toilet
is actually like one of the things that like a labouring
woman, actually it's, it feels the best because your pelvic
floor naturally releases and relaxes when you're in that
position because you're peeing, pooping, doing whatever.
So your body's used to in that position and in that place
(13:10):
relaxing. So actually the toilet is called
the dilation station helps you to dilate because you're able to
completely relax your pelvic floor.
You can let out any pee. You can let whatever.
You're just sitting there. So I was actually sitting on the
toilet and I was like contracting.
And I felt myself like kind of push like, and it wasn't me.
(13:34):
It was like, that's just the wayyour body, like naturally, your
body naturally just pushes your baby out.
And my sister comes into the bathroom.
She's like, you're doing OK. I think I'm pushing.
And she's like, I think you are too.
I just heard you grunt. And I was like, I think I need
to go to the hospital. And like, she could tell that I
was worried because we are an hour and 10 minutes away from
(13:57):
the hospital. And I was just like, I'm I'm,
I'm nervous. And she's like, don't be
nervous. You're going to be just fine.
You're going to make it there. But you need, you should
probably leave like right now. And I was like, I agree.
I should leave, right. I should probably left 30
minutes ago. So that's what happened there.
And then she's like, I'm going to go take care of Rigel.
I'm going to have Robert come inhere.
And. Yeah.
(14:17):
Yeah. So I got everybody loaded up in
the truck, you, me and Hazen andmy stomach.
Yeah. And we start driving, it's like
an hour and 10 minutes like you said in Windy Country Rd.
Back Rd. And you had like had all these
playlists that you had made. We didn't turn that on really at
all. I.
Did I had it on in the bath and in the bathroom?
(14:38):
Like I had it on but it was justreally low.
Yeah, but we start driving and we don't really play any music
while we're driving. I'm just listening to you moan
the whole way and then every bump that we hit, whoa.
So I'm like, all right, this is going to be a new audio track
here, but. We had to take back roads to get
to the main highway and it was pretty rough.
(15:00):
Pretty rough. Yeah, so we get to the hospital
at 11. It was.
Like 11. O five, Yeah, eleven.
O 5 Jack the duel and meets us there.
We're unloading the truck and then you get an all fours in the
parking lot of the hospital and I'm like, I didn't want to have
a baby in the parking lot. Jack's like all right, I think
(15:23):
y'all came at the right time. So we get into the hospital
doors and it is weird. It's like we went to the
emergency room, that's where they told us to go.
And they're probably used to seeing all kinds of riffraff in
there. And like the guy at the counter,
they had to have us go to like ametal detector and like security
and they got the counters like looking at you because you had
(15:44):
gone through 1st and you're likemoaning and like leaning up
against the counter. And he's like, kind of like
looking around, like totally oblivious.
And he just looks up at you withhis big smiles like, and what
are you in for today? The duel is like, like I was
speechless and duel was like, she's having a baby.
So he finally LED us through. The other security guard was
(16:06):
like, she can't even write her name on the paper you take over.
The front, the front office guy was like the one asking the
question. Then the security guard is the
one that was like, hey, man, whydon't you sign in these papers
for her because she's having a hard time getting through it.
Yeah. So you get through that and they
don't really wait very long there.
So that was pretty smooth. We get up to our room.
And yeah, we didn't even have togo through triage or anything.
(16:28):
They just sent me right to laborand delivery.
And like we had they just renovated all those rooms.
We had like a good nice room. They had like a stand up shower.
I mean is ample space for sure is cozy.
So the which? Is kind of cool because that's
the room that we toured yeah andwhen they said that I was like
Oh yes, because I like had envisioned that room so.
So in the room there is one to two nurses at any given point.
(16:50):
There's our midwife, Sarah Beth.There is our doula, Jack.
We had a birth photographer. So I remember we got there two
nurses, Jack, Sarah Beth, photographer.
You and me. Yeah.
OK. And one of the nurses was for me
and one of them was for Hazen. But because I came in like a
push in, they had the baby, the baby nurse there the whole time.
(17:14):
Yeah, and I've never done this before.
So I'm like, are we going to be here for 30 minutes or are we
going to be here for 30 hours? Like, I didn't know what to
expect. So I'm just kind of at your head
trying to comfort you, and they're all at your feet.
And then Sarah bet the midwife'slike, all right, Robert, you
trade places with Jack and you get at her feet because you're
(17:35):
going to be delivering. And I'm OK.
I guess we're moving along pretty quick here.
Let's go through this first. Like when we first get there, I
was at home sitting on the toilet.
I did not even want to get in the car.
That did not sound fun. So when we got there, I
immediately was like, get me on that toilet.
And so I went straight to the bathroom like I don't think I
looked at anyone. I was just like beeline toilet
(17:55):
sat there and then and I really liked that position.
Like the squatting positions. They're like, let's get you off
the toilet. And they had like this blow up
squat thing and that was pretty cool.
And then I eventually, like, slipped off like on purpose, but
it's like came off and they're like, we can do this, but we can
(18:17):
do it on the bed so that you, like, don't slip off.
And so we ended up moving to thebed and we're able to be in that
same position, which I really like was, which was like
squatted. But like the back part of my,
like the upper part of my butt was able to be on the top part
of the bed. And they have a second part of
the bed that like, my feet were able to be down, which was so
(18:37):
cool. Yeah.
And so we're doing all that you're pushing and you, I mean,
you pretty much hit the ground running, pushing and.
We probably got up to the room and stuff at like 11:15 and then
Jack said like I was pretty muchpushing like as soon as I got
into the bathroom. But she's like, you really
started like actively pushing probably around like 11:45.
(19:00):
Yeah. And then you push for probably 2
hours, 2 1/2 hours. Yeah, I think it was like an
hour and a half. Yeah, hour.
And a half and then we hit a roadblock plateau for for a
second there in that first little stint of pushing, like I
saw his head. Yeah, and they were like yelling
baby, baby. Yeah, So I saw his head and I'm
(19:22):
like, I can't tell if he's gotten here.
I can't tell. I can't really tell what I'm
looking at right now. But then there was like no
progress being made for a good little stint.
So they. And I was pushing really hard
and she's like, you're a really efficient pusher.
And so I'm not really sure why he's not coming out.
And I up into this point like my, my midwife is a freaking
(19:43):
bomb. She.
Was pretty impressive. She was amazing.
So with a being AV back, a anesthesiologist and a doctor
have to be in the hospital when I show up and they have to stay
the entire labour. So the doctor was asking and
she's like, like he was asking like, what's she dilated to?
How is progression like what's baby doing?
(20:04):
Like all of these things? Did you guys do an ultrasound?
And she's like, it doesn't matter.
She's pushing. I can see the baby's head like
she like she was just like boom,boom, boom.
And I literally like. Like snapped and she's like,
yes, and I was just like, you are amazing because he didn't
even come in like she this was all being informed through the
(20:26):
nurse because she was just like,we don't need any extra things
happening in this room right now.
Crystal's progressions going great, yada, yada, But I also
didn't really want to be checked.
I also didn't really want to don't to know my dilation.
I didn't. I just wanted to go in and have
my baby and whatever. So she was like, she knew that
and she said at the point that Ihad been pushing for like an
(20:48):
hour and a half and she's like, we can see him.
We can see that he's trying to come down, but he's not fully
coming down. You're really efficient at
pushing. I need to kind of see what's
going on to see if he's in the right position or what's going
on. So then she was like, I'm going
to check you. So she got up there checked.
She's like, he's in a great position, but you have a
(21:09):
cervical lip, so that was preventing him from coming down.
And if you guys don't know, likea cervical lip is part of the
cervix that hasn't dilated back before baby's head really starts
to come down. So his head was pushing on part
of the cervix and it wasn't allowing it to go up anymore.
So if you keep pushing on that piece of the cervix, it will get
(21:32):
inflamed and like swollen. And a lot of times it does send
people into AC section because they can no longer get that lip
to come back. Or you end up getting a epidural
and they usually give you like Benadryl or something to
decrease that swelling and you wait a little while longer to
push and so on. So knowing I didn't want an
(21:55):
epidural, knowing I didn't want AC section, she said we're going
to change you into these positions.
So they had me end up rolling onmy stomach with one of my legs
up for like 20 minutes on that side, then 20 minutes on the
other side, and then was there another one?
I feel like there's three of them.
It was three, I think. I think 1 was it was stomach
(22:17):
sad, sad or back sad sad, but itwas both sides for sure.
It was like 20 minutes, 25 minutes each side or each
position. Yeah, and that was probably the
worst because at this point my body had been pushing on its own
and then I was helping it to push.
So I was obviously having painful contractions and I my
(22:41):
body was pushing, so I was having to fight my body pushing
and get through all these contractions and try to relax
enough for his head to ease off of that cervix.
And she tried to help with that too, like she actually like used
her finger to move it past too Ithink.
At the end, yeah, So we did all those positions and I just kept
(23:03):
saying, can we be done with this?
Like I want to be done with thispart.
I can't. I cannot do this anymore because
it's like I'm fighting my body so much.
I've never had to fight my body so much.
It was weird to watch because it's like you were not actively
pushing, you know, trying to physically, consciously do it.
And it was like you'd almost like doze off in between
(23:24):
contractions. Yeah, I did definitely doze off
a little bit. I do remember like, praying in
that position and just being like, God, you've got to help me
get through this. Like this is exactly everything
I've wanted. Like I, I think I was fearful at
that point because I knew that the having that lip could
prevent me from having him that way, like vaginally.
(23:48):
And I just needed to be calm andlike, get through it.
And nothing was calm after that moment.
But but at least I felt like a little bit of peace about it.
And yeah, so then we ended up being done with that, that
piece. So that was about an hour.
So you pushed hard for like hourand a half, maybe 2 hours.
There's like an hour where you were.
(24:09):
Trying to fight. It pushing but not consciously
pushing. And then after that it was like
PR go time, like everything you got.
So they got this ski handle, like this handlebar thing across
the bed that you were holding onto changing a few different
positions. Then they get this ski rope
handle and they had you pulling against that so you can kind of
(24:29):
like crunch your whole body in while pushing.
And they were like trying to explain what muscles to
contract. And they were like, think of it
like you're doing a lateral raise.
I'm like, no, not a lateral raise.
Think of it like you're doing a row and then.
And that really clicked, yeah. So you.
Started doing like a row and I'mlike I'm useful here.
Yeah. Well, so at this point they had,
(24:51):
they had flipped me back. They said get in whatever
position you want to be in. So I got back into like that
kind of like squatting position.And then she actually ended up
pushing the cervical lip out of the way.
And let me tell you, having someone's hand up there while
you're trying to get your baby out is not 0 fun.
And it hurts because they're pushing this tight lip over the
(25:16):
baby's head. So that was a lot of fun.
But yeah, they had a bar and we,I pulled on the bar for a little
while and then was there something else?
There was the handles like the. Standard, Oh, they had the
handles on the side. Yep.
And then they had like several different things I could put my
feet on. I put my feet on the bar and
then I put my feet on the littlestirrup things and like all
(25:37):
different kinds of things. But yeah, that was really
helpful. You're like like you're doing a
row and that was that was it like that what really helped me
to, to do it and it I felt like,so I didn't want coached
pushing, but because I had a lipand because I had already been
pushing for an hour and a half to two hours, my body was so
(25:59):
exhausted and then I was fighting my body to not have to
not be pushing and stuff. So I had already been doing
things for like 2 1/2 hours veryactively, like aggressively
doing things with my body to tryto get the baby out.
So by this point I was like so tired.
My, my body was very tired. And so I feel like I wasn't as
(26:22):
efficient with the second part where I actually pushed him out.
So it's almost like I needed reminders of like, OK, pull
here, push here, you know, like,so they ended up helping me a
lot. And it was really helpful.
Like during the contraction, they would say little things to
me and I'm like, you have to keep saying that like, because
it's reminding me to, to do thisor to use these muscles.
(26:45):
But then they're like, don't push unless your body feels like
it needs to push. Like we're not going to tell you
push, push, push, push, push. You know, they're just like,
when you feel the urge to push, go for it, you know?
And that was so helpful. And it was just like everything.
It was everything I wanted. It was so awesome.
Because like normally in a hospital setting, like you're
(27:07):
given an epidural, so you can't really feel what your body is
naturally telling you to do as well.
Yeah, you can tell a little bit,but you can't really.
Yeah. And then they typically want you
just laying flat on your back with your knees up.
Right. Yeah, I think that's a little
less common now. I think that hospitals are
(27:27):
realizing that there is actuallysuccess with women doing what
they want to do. But I think more so like being
on the bed is helpful because that way they can they can
actually catch the baby rather than like someone standing or
whatever, which I did not want to stand.
I wanted to stand the beginning of like start of Labor, but then
at the end I was like. Yeah.
(27:48):
Squat me down, I don't want anything else.
So you're pushing, you're pushing, you're pushing.
That pretty much brings us to the Ring of Fire, right?
Yes. What is the Ring of Fire?
We I pushed so stinking hard to get his head through that lip.
I. You were, you were hitting some
(28:08):
PRS for sure. I kept looking over at you
because I'm trying to juggle catching the baby, but then like
comforting you. There's a couple times there
where you were like they offeredlaughing gas and you were kind
of like on the fence. If then you asked me and I'm
like, no, if you do this, you'regoing to look back on this and
regret you took the laughing gas.
(28:29):
So don't take the laughing gas. So that was, but you were kind
of vulnerable at that. Point Yeah, it was I was
vulnerable and I also felt like,I don't know how, how long I
have to keep going. Yeah, like, I don't know, like,
are we almost past the lip? Are we like, where am I at?
And she was just trying to get me to relax enough to like get
through that hard part and you're like, yeah, don't do it.
(28:50):
So I was like, OK, we're not doing it.
Like I kept looking at her because she was obviously
knowledgeable and she didn't seem fazed by anything.
So I'm like, OK, if she's not fazed, if she's cool comic
collected, then I'll be cool comic collected.
So we just kept ripping with that.
And then I, but I kept looking at you several times and like
(29:13):
you were pushing pretty hard. I mean, you had like veins
coming out everywhere doing those rows and I could
definitely tell that you were having it.
You were. You were.
You were not having fun there. My entire body was involved in
getting this baby out. Yeah.
And then so then the Ring of Fire.
So baby's head pops out, Hazen'shead pops out.
(29:36):
So it's it's when like the head is like partly out and well, you
feel the Ring of Fire when the head is coming out.
But he his head was like partly out.
And that is quite literally at the Ring of Fire.
It just burns and it's stretching.
Your skin is stretching at that point.
And he just chills there for like 2 minutes.
(29:56):
Yeah. And you want that stretch to
happen so that you don't tear. So it's like you're trying to
breathe through it. You're like, and they're like,
this is a good stretch. You want to stay here.
It's OK to relax your body. And I was actually able to
relax, like during that time. It took me a minute, but like,
you breathe through it, OK, It'sgoing to be all right.
It feels OK. It's starting to ease off
because it's stretching and it starts to feel a little bit
(30:19):
better and better and better. But yeah, she had to, like, move
that lip out of the way. And I finally got to that point
and I got, I started getting a little nervous at that point
because it hurt really bad all the way around.
Yeah. I thought I had ruptured at that
(30:40):
point. And I looked at my midwife and
she was looking at me and she knew without me saying anything,
she knew exactly what I was thinking.
And I looked at her and I was like, it really hurts.
Like it doesn't feel the same. And it really hurts.
And she's like, you're going to be OK.
And then I saw her eyes wander, like going to the monitor, is
(31:02):
the baby OK? Looking at me like, is she OK?
Is she bleeding? Is she, you know, like all the
things. And she's like, you're OK.
Like she just. We locked eyes and I think we
like locked eyes for like a fullon minute and for her to like,
convince me like, you're OK, this is normal.
You've just never felt this before.
Your baby's coming out right nowand it was like.
(31:24):
Speaking of Hazen the whole time, the whole time his heart
rate was like 138. The most perfect heart rate and
Rigel was the same way. The entire time I was in labor
with Rigel, his heart rate was perfect.
Just cool, calm and collected. Yeah, but Hazen, they kept
saying that they're like, this kid is chill.
Yeah. So at that point, when the
(31:45):
head's hanging out, I'm all right, my time to get involved
here. So I come round back to catch
him and she was like, she didn'tknow which way his shoulders
were positioned. It's like she's got his head,
She's trying to find his shoulders.
But then she's like twisting thehead one way, then the next to
find the shoulders. And I'm like, man, that head's
(32:06):
probably not supposed to do thatis it looks like popping off
here in a second. So she found the shoulders and
then I get into position and then I catch him.
He comes out, we flip him upsidedown so he can exhale, start
breathing. Cough up all the yeah.
Stuff cough up everything at that instant.
There's like blood gushing everywhere.
(32:30):
Then we caught him, I caught him, and then I put him on your
chest. Yeah, you guys had him there for
a minute. I was like, can I have him?
But they were trying to get the stuff out of like out of his
lungs and stuff and. Then as soon as I caught him and
like flipped him upside down, you could hear him like crying
for the first time or squeal or whatever it was he did.
He did not come out screeching like Rigel did.
(32:51):
He came out like. Yeah, it's kind of just like a
cough and then like, like prettychill.
Yeah, but he was breathing and his skin was going the right
color and yeah. So that was pretty cool.
I feel like you just had like this big sigh of relief at that
moment, the moment you heard himand I put him on on you.
And then then we we we couldn't let we couldn't delay cutting
(33:14):
the cord too long because you would torn.
They had to stitch you up and you were bleeding more,
hemorrhaging more, so they triedto push all of the fluid to the
ML cord to him, and then I cut that pretty quickly after he was
born. Yeah, I was bummed about that.
And like I was looking at her doing it.
I was like, do we want this to happen?
And she's like, you're hemorrhaging.
(33:34):
I need to, I need this to, I need to, we need to get the show
on the road. And so I was like, OK, I mean,
whatever we got to do. OK, here we are like let's go.
Cuz you know, when you hear likeyou're bleeding a lot, I need to
stop it. It's like, OK, whatever you got
to do, let's boogie on. And she's like, I'm going to get
him as much blood as he she possibly can.
But there hasn't been a lot of studies on pushing the cord
(33:58):
blood through the cord to the baby like that quickly.
And so I kind of like looked up at Jack and I'm like, is this
what we want? And it was kind of like it was
already happening. And I really wanted him to have
all of his blood. So I'm like, they've done it
enough. I guess we're we're going with
it. This is what we're doing.
So yeah, unfortunately we couldn't wait for it to just
(34:20):
stop pulsing on its own. But he did get all the blood
back because it was, I mean, it was white.
Yeah, and they they kept saying how healthy the placenta and the
cord look. Yeah, the cord was like super
thick. And then they kept saying, like,
they were like looking at the placenta for a while after I had
been stitched up and all that. They're like, look at this
placenta. It is so healthy and like, yeah,
(34:43):
that's what diet does for you. Yeah, so they handed me like
these little toy scissors that Icut the cord with.
I really wanted to use that Obsidian rock that Rigel would
have napped. They wouldn't let me do that,
but it would have been sharper than those scissors they give
me. For sure.
So you got that and then they stitched you up.
(35:03):
I tried to help with that too. I told him I baited mini A fish
and lure, but they wouldn't let me stitch you up.
But they got you all stitched up.
It took a long time. I was not expecting it to take
that long, but she was down there forever.
He was born at 3:30 in the morning and then we'd probably
didn't leave that room until like 445 or five to get to our
(35:25):
main relax for. It was 6 Yeah.
Because well, so she oh and thatwas like the worst.
I don't even know if you were like watching all that was
happening like so she before shestitched me up, she had to push
on like my fundus and like push everything out.
Like put all I felt was the insane amount of liquid coming
(35:49):
out of my body. It was like a ton and it was
like blood and urine and all of the all of the things.
And so she was pushing it out because I was bleeding.
She was pushing it out and I like looked at her and she's
like it's OK. So it is a lot.
It's OK. Like freaking.
Out 'cause they have like this bag thing that they put there
(36:12):
like a little kangaroo patch on it that's designed to catch all
the blood and I guess the baby if you drop the baby.
But they said that it normally it's got like measuring dashes
on it and they said that it's typical to have like 500 mils
and I think you were like 700 mils or something.
Which is still less than like anaverage loss in AC section, but
(36:34):
yeah, she's like it's mixed in with a urine and stuff.
So I'm going to guess it was about 700 and you know,
whatever. And but it felt crazy, like it
felt like the crazy amount coming out.
But anywho. Yeah, so I got you all stitched
up. And I, I only had a one like a
first degree tear, so that actually wasn't bad at all.
(36:56):
I did have a couple of just likelittle lacerations which
actually took longer to heal, but we decided to leave those
and let those heal naturally. And then the first degree tear
we sewed. Yeah, and we wheeled ourselves
back to the chill room, whateverthey call that.
And then? Postpartum.
Yeah. And then we were there.
(37:17):
So we got there like 6, I guess,and then we left.
That would have been six Saturday morning and then we got
checked out at noon on Sunday. And then we were just pretty
much there the whole that whole time.
Not really sleeping because theydon't want you to sleep with the
baby for SIDS. Sudden sudden infant death
syndrome. Yeah, well, they just don't want
(37:38):
you to like, drop the baby. Yeah, so we don't really want to
not be with the baby. So like you would hold them and
sleep while I was laying awake? Thing that they have.
Like I wouldn't want to lay in that plastic thing after being
in my mom's womb for 10 months. Yeah, so we pretty much like
stayed awake. We didn't sleep at all Saturday,
basically. Yeah, we didn't sleep.
(37:58):
So because I had them 3:30 in the morning, so we didn't sleep
that whole night. And then you're just high on
baby vibes that you're like, I'mnot sleeping.
So we ordered coffee or breakfast or both.
Oh, no, Heather. We're going to, Yeah.
She brought us coffee. We're going to order.
We were going to just see what they had to eat at the
(38:18):
cafeteria. And I walked down there and I,
like, walked around and I'm like, there's nothing here.
So I walked right back up and then let's just order a coffee.
And. And then somebody said you can
make an omelet and the cafeteriastomach because I wanted
something hot. You wanted something hot to eat
and OK, go get us an omelet and made you an omelet.
They're like using oils. I'm like, don't use the oils.
(38:40):
And then they were like, I'm like, can I just get a dozen
eggs scrambled up and they went and grabbed A carton to pour my
eggs in and I'm like, I want eggs cracked.
They didn't have those. So yeah, the hospital foods
lackluster for sure. They brought us a few things,
but it was all like oatmeal and.Yeah, they brought us meals
without me actually asking. And then I felt bad because I
(39:00):
wasted food, even though it's food we don't eat.
Like I felt bad for still wasting it.
And they would come and pick it up and they would like, is this
girl eating? I'm like, yes, we just ordered
different foods. Shout out to keto bricks, man
bars, carnivore bars, cheese puffs.
We had, we had like all those moon cheese.
Yeah, moon cheese, Yeah. So I ate a bunch of that and
(39:22):
then just snuggle with hazing. And then Rigel and Heather came
with Caroline. That was Saturday around noon.
Yeah. Yeah, so they came.
Yeah, I think it was. Roger got some meters.
Yeah, brother, which was pretty cool.
We had like got this little backpack with some goodies in it
that we told Roger was from Hazen, so he was all excited and
he was like jumping up on the bed, hugging him and kissing
(39:43):
him. That was pretty.
Cute. Yeah, Robert went down and got
Rigel so he can come in by himself, like with just the four
of us, and we had our photographer come back and she
took pictures like of us all, like being together when.
Did we get those photos? Yesterday.
You got him already. Yeah, I haven't looked at him
yet because we were busy all dayyesterday, but I haven't looked
(40:05):
at him, so yeah. They're almost there on the big
screen. Yeah.
So yeah, I'm excited to see. Those I don't know, I was like,
I had actually, I had purchased a gown that opens from like all
sides so that if they did have to do an emergency surgery, if
they needed to get in the back, if they need to get in the front
or whatever, like it looks like a hospital gown, but it was like
(40:28):
I bought an all black one. It was one of my own, like I
could wash it. I purchased that to wear and
then we got there and I was justlike, I wore no clothes the
whole time. I was just like and so I don't
know how many of the pictures wecan share.
There's definitely something that you probably wouldn't want.
To share, there's definitely ones I would not want to share.
Yeah, but. Definitely some.
(40:49):
But there's, it's, I think it's going to be hard to like find
exactly. I posted one like on our
announcement and I, I called Robert immediately.
I was like, can you go look at the post that I just made?
I 'cause I am so like in love with like all things birth that
like I watch birth videos and I follow a lot of these pages that
(41:10):
like post just like people having babies and stuff and
people are not wearing clothes. So I in my head it's like, OK,
if I just like cover my nipples,I'll be OK.
And then I realized after posting it, I was like, no, like
all of these people are going tosee it.
And it's like called rower. I was like, is this OK?
Should I take it down? And he's like, Nah, I think it's
(41:32):
fine. And I'm like, my hope was that
everyone was looking at Hazen's face anyways and not me.
Well, I I gave because we tried to vlog it, because we had, We
haven't been really good about vlogging, but we've vlogged
Rigel's bursts. We tried to.
I've blogged this one too. And then I gave chip the SD
card. Was there some nipple picks in
that chip on the? Pictures, yes.
(41:54):
So Chip knows what your nipples look like.
You know it's fine, Chip. I'm a man, that's what.
He said it wasn't sexual. Yeah, there was a TV there.
Yeah, that's. Hilarious.
Yeah. We're all one big family here at
Keto Rick Company. You know, well, and I knew with
(42:14):
like this being what we were doing that that was that's
likely to happen, you know, likewith the pictures and stuff
being on there so. It's weird that like, like birth
is not a sexualized thing. Nipples and breastfeeding are
pretty much go hand in hand withbirth.
Yeah. And modern society just like,
(42:35):
takes things out of context, youknow?
Like, you wouldn't think it's weird watching a wild animal
breastfeeding A pup or somethinglike that, you know?
So who knows? But yeah, we have a Hazen now
and he's just as cute as he can be.
He is, is is it? It'll be interesting to see how
he is different than Rigel as hegrows.
(42:56):
But I don't remember Rigel beingthis boob hungry.
Nope. Like he is latched or crying one
of the other. He's crying because he wants
milk or he is on me. I'll all the.
Time if I'm holding them, he'll either sleep, he'll be sleeping,
but if he's not sleeping and like wanting a boob, I obviously
(43:16):
can't help him there, but I I'llput my finger in his mouth head
just like go for it, he'll be there.
He is like a. Shark finger for 30 minutes.
Yeah. And it just like just crazy.
I'm like, you are like a shark right now.
It's it's nuts sleeping but rolling his eyes back.
Yeah, so feeling very blessed for sure, very grateful.
(43:38):
Everything went smoothly and then.
You know, it's kind of weird is like talking about the birth
because it's obviously I was going through all that to bring
a child into this world, but nowlike spending as much time with
him. Like you were there the whole
time, you know, like you were there doing the things, doing
your part inside the whole time.And it just kind of crazy
(44:01):
because now I know him, you know, It's like now I know you
and you were, you were the one Iwas working so hard for, you
know? It's so cool.
By far the hardest thing I've ever done.
Yeah, by far hardest thing I've ever done.
It's cool. I'm proud of you, babe.
So worth it. But the bummer, the bummer is
that like Robert and I both said, like I would have pushed
him out no prob. He probably would have been out
(44:23):
by 1:30 had I not had that lip. Yeah, but because I did, we went
another couple hours, but I think I would have had no
problem. Just like.
Yeah, had we not had bad and we didn't have that like
intermission period, like I feellike you would have looked back
on that, but I mean, I wouldn't too bad easy.
Yeah. So yeah, that definitely.
(44:46):
But you, you just got some more savage points with that little
hurdle, you know, and. I do think I mean I have like
the happy go lucky feelings and stuff, but for me personally, I
do not think laboring naturally like without medication was that
(45:06):
bad. Like yes, you were.
I was breathing through moaning.Some things are really
uncomfortable. There was times where my back
hurt really bad. There was times where you know,
like, yes, but ultimately I lookback and I'm like, that was not
as bad as I thought it was goingto be.
You know, I think the hardest part actually, even the in the
(45:28):
beginning pushing was not that bad.
Like I don't think it was that bad.
And pushing actually kind of gave a little bit of like
relief. But the end part was the hardest
trying to get past that lip and that was the most exhausting.
I think that was the hardest part, hardest thing I've ever
done because I think before thatit was like, this is hard, This
(45:49):
is like some work, but I didn't feel like this is the worst
until I really got to the end and then I was like, this is the
worst. Yeah, I mean, had that not been
there and he'd come out with that first run of pushing, like
I was watching the whole time and you didn't seem to be like
dismayed at all. Like you seemed like you were
(46:10):
going strong, just rocking it, you know?
Yep, and there was times of likehappy smiling, you know,
whatever through the labour of the pushing the whatever until
the end. And then I was just like, I am
literally like falling asleep orlike my eyes rolling back in my
head or whatever during that last bit.
(46:31):
And how old is he now? He's so he's born on the 5th.
Two week tomorrow he'll be two weeks.
Tomorrow he'll be two weeks. Yeah, today's Friday and we're
super happy, super grateful, super blessed, super thankful.
All the things that we had hopedfor.
We just got back from Oklahoma yesterday.
We took newborn pictures with him and then the family pictures
(46:53):
in. Oklahoma, it's like right over
the border, but it was in Tulsa.So that'll be good.
And Roger's so far being an awesome Big Brother, like I've
been pretty pleased. Like he doesn't seem jealous.
I mean, there's definitely some changes, but he doesn't seem
like he doesn't seem put off at all.
(47:13):
Yeah, he, I can tell that he definitely has feelings.
Like even last night, like he wanted me and I tried so hard to
just like, give him as much of me as I could.
But there was a certain point itwas like, we've got to go
different ways because like I have to take care of Hazen.
And you were there. I mean, it wasn't like, it
(47:35):
wasn't like. But then as soon as I started
reading his book, he'd chill it out.
It was totally fine. Yeah, he was just a little
emotional. Any anyways, he was just late.
But I feel like when it's just been the four of us or me and
the two boys, it's been pretty chill.
It's more so when people are visiting that he's crazy.
Like when Heather was here, he was a little hyperactive.
(47:58):
When your parents were here, little hyperactive.
My dad's here, little hyperactive.
Like he's just like trying to get attention and he's just
getting into like mischief. And I feel like that has a bit
to do with Hazen because he's always been like, not always,
(48:18):
but he's more recently been moreexcitable and kind of getting
into himself into mischief and just not listening and you know,
normal, typical 3 year old things.
But I think it's amplified when someone else is in from out of
town for sure visiting. So I, it's so helpful that
people are here, but it's also makes it a little bit more
(48:40):
challenging with Rigel and I don't want to get on to him.
You know, it's like, I don't want to get on to you.
I want us to be like snuggling and happy and playful and all of
that. But now I feel like I'm having
to get on to you because you're being a little extra because
other people are here. So it's almost like, I don't
know if it's going to be easier or harder because like other
people are doing things to be helpful, like cooking, cleaning,
(49:04):
like all of that, playing with him, taking him out, doing
whatever. But it also is making it more
challenging to parent him. So it's, it's been the
interesting balance of all of the things and, and healing.
I actually think this birth was harder for me to heal than my
(49:25):
C-section. But my midwife kind of warned
me. She's like, you have a lot of
swelling, but probably just because I had to really push
through that. She said you had a lot of
swelling, a little tear, you know, like just take it easy.
You feel like you're healing up good though.
I do, but like after yesterday, we had such a long day yesterday
I was hurting and I think I likekind of triggered my body to
(49:52):
like bleed a little bit more andjust because I was going, you
know, and it's like I just had ababy two weeks ago and you
think, oh, you had a baby two weeks ago?
Like that's a pretty good healing time.
It's really not like a lot of people do the 555.
It's like 5 days in the bed, 5 days on the bed, 5 days around
the bed. So this would have been like the
(50:13):
last bed of like maybe I have another day or two of like
around the bed and I have been doing all of the things.
So I feel like I've I am healing.
I'm hoping that I'm not doing mybody any bad for how active I've
been, but I've also been trying to rest like when Rigel naps, I
lay down the whole time. I don't try to get up and clean
(50:35):
the house or do whatever. Me and haze and we we all three
nap together And so that's for acouple hours and then I sleep
all night long. You know, like I try to like
rest when it's rest time, I try to just lay down.
But when it's the daytime, it's even just sitting in a chair,
like a hard chair, a hard surface is 0% fun.
(50:57):
But like even on the couch, it'sjust like the gravity is still
pulling down. And so it's like really, unless
I'm laying, does that feel good?Like I said, at the end of the
day, I'm just like, thank goodness my body can finally
rest. So I don't know.
I think it's just different because we have a little person
to run after now and we're busy people and there's just a lot
(51:19):
going on. It's just, it is what it is.
If in the imperfect world you could have all of that time,
that's wonderful for you. But we're busy people.
Give me this lunch. We've got lives to live here.
(51:42):
All right. Is there anything else we want
to add to this podcast? Oh my, no, I don't think so.
I mean, I'm sure we're going to get off of here and I'm be like,
oh, I should have said this. Oh I should have said that, but
if anyone is looking to have AV back or whatever, even if you're
like a first time parent or justwant to hear more birth stories,
(52:04):
more information about birth, things like that.
This one is specifically for V backs, but it is for everyone
because it shares a lot of different stories.
I have been addicted to the V back link.
It's a podcast and they have an awesome Facebook group.
(52:24):
Like it's very positive. If there is negativity, they
like immediately remove it and things like that.
So that was really helpful for me since Rigel's birth because I
had a really hard time processing Rigel's birth and
just listening to those stories,listening to other people who
have gone through similar situations and wanting AV back.
And then maybe they had a repeatC-section or maybe they did have
(52:47):
a successful V back or maybe they had a successful home birth
V back. And yeah, so I would highly
recommend the V back link. That was a huge thing for me.
Very encouraging. And then I'm also happy to talk
with people too, if people. And there was like several
people who would like watch on Instagram, they're like, I can't
(53:07):
wait to hear how it goes. And like, I'm so curious.
I'm hoping for mine too or I just had to be back or whatever
like it doesn't. Seem what is Jack's socials
again like? Shout out to Jack or Doula.
So she is actually ending with this company or their their
partnership separating, separating out this partnership
and then she's going into a partnership with someone else.
(53:29):
So right now it's the natural state doulas and they should be
linking out to what she's going to be changing into next.
But. Jenna had to say her Beth, her
midwife. Yeah, she was amazing.
Yeah, she was. Everyone was amazing.
It literally went as perfectly as it could have.
Like, it was awesome. The people were awesome.
(53:50):
My nurse was absolutely fantastic.
They for V backs, they require continuous monitoring.
They like continuous monitoring for everyone.
But as a V back, you can't really opt out.
But this nurse, she held on thatmonitor the entire time like she
they did not strap them on to me.
She let me change positions and then she would find a spot and
(54:12):
then she'd stay there and if I was uncomfortable, she'd let me
move again. Like she and she did not even
talk to me. She just was like following my
vibes, following my moves, doingall the things and like then
checking out his heart rate and then like holding it there.
She was just amazing. She was so amazing.
Solid team for sure. Yeah, everyone was so awesome.
(54:32):
Proud of you babe, I love you. Thanks, love you too.
Proud of you Hazen. You got anything to end the mic?
Nothing. He just pooped, so I guess
you're holding him now. All right, Joe, I'm going to go
change a diaper. Love you babe.
Love you too. Till next time, y'all ta ta.
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