May 13, 2025 • 35 mins
Feeling stuck in the grind of a “successful” career that doesn’t light you up anymore?
This episode of Shedding the Corporate Bitch is a no-fluff conversation every high-performing leader, HR executive, and ambitious professional needs to hear. Host Bernadette Boas sits down with Tammy Alvarez, former Wall Street executive turned CEO of Career Winners Circle, who left the corner office behind to build a life and business she actually loves—and now teaches others to do the same.
Tammy pulls back the curtain on the corporate myths that keep professionals stuck, including the biggest lie we tell ourselves about career control. You’ll walk away with bold, actionable strategies for taking back your power, building a personal brand that gets noticed, and even negotiating for your worth—without waiting for permission.
In This Episode, You'll Learn:
- Why loving Mondays isn’t a fantasy—and how to make it your reality
- The “CEO of You” mindset and how to use it to drive your career
- What really happens behind closed doors in the C-suite (and how to play the game)
- How to create a Stakeholder Heat Map to build influence across your company
- How to say “yes, and…” to your boss while setting boundaries
- Why it's time to stop waiting for recognition—and start leading your own narrative
Whether you're an executive leader, HR professional, or someone at a career crossroads, this episode will give you the clarity and tools to move from burnout to boldness.
👤 About Our Guest:
Tammy Alvarez is the founder of Career Winners Circle, a career and leadership coaching firm that empowers professionals to build fulfilling careers they love—without sacrificing income or impact. A former Wall Street Managing Director, Tammy now lives in Mexico City and coaches professionals across the globe to break the rules and thrive on their own terms.
🔗 Learn more: https://www.careerwinnerscircle.com
- Tammy’s book: Escaping the Career Traps (Available on Amazon)
💥 Ready to Shed the Corporate Bitch?
Subscribe, rate & review the podcast to never miss a leadership breakthrough.
👉 Need help navigating your next career move or building a powerhouse team?
Visit https://balloffirecoaching.com to connect with Bernadette.
Tammy Alvarez on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/tammyalvarez1
Bernadette Boas on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/bernadetteboas
#SheddingTheCorporateBitch, #LeadershipPodcast, #CareerReinvention, #LoveMondaysAgain, #TammyAlvarez, #BernadetteBoas, #ExecutiveCoaching, #CorporateLeadership, #HRLeadership, #WomenInBusiness, #CareerGrowth, #PersonalBranding, #PowerhouseLeaders, #BreakTheRules
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Have you ever hit a wall in your career?
Maybe you found yourselfwondering if it's time to
rebuild, accelerate or simplytake a different approach to the
work that you do every day.
Whether it's reconsidering whoyou're working with, how you're
leading, or even redefining yourrole within the same company,
one thing's clear Building acareer over 10, 20, or 30 years
(00:25):
can feel daunting and downrightexhausting.
But don't worry.
Today's episode is aboutreigniting that spark.
Our guest, tiffany Alvarez ofCareer Winner Circle, is here to
share her proven strategies tohelp you take control,
accelerate your career and stepinto the role of an empowered
business leader.
(00:45):
Tiffany believes your careershould be treated like a
thriving business, one whereyou're always making bold
strategic decisions to keep itgrowing.
She'll show you how torediscover the excitement of
making a big impact and lovingevery Monday morning again.
So grab a cup of coffee, leanin and get ready to rethink your
career plan.
(01:06):
Stay with us and loving everyMonday morning again.
So grab a cup of coffee, leanin and get ready to rethink your
career plan.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
Stay with us, come here.
Welcome to Shedding theCorporate Bitch, the podcast
(01:30):
that transforms today's managersinto tomorrow's powerhouse
leaders.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Your host.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Bernadette Boas, executive coach and author,
brings you into a world wherethe corporate grind meets
personal growth and success ineach and every episode.
With more than 25 years incorporate trenches, bernadette's
own journey from beingdismissed as a tyrant boss to
becoming a sought-afterleadership coach and speaker
illustrates the very essence oftransformation that she now
inspires in others with her tips, strategies and stories.
(01:54):
So if you're ready to shed thebitches of fear and insecurity,
ditch the imposter syndrome andstep into the role of the
powerhouse leader you were bornto be, this podcast is for you.
Let's do this.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
Tammy, welcome, welcome, welcome.
How are you?
It's awesome to see you.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
Thank you so much.
This is my first podcastrecording of the new year
probably for you too, I'mguessing.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Yes, me too.
I think this is a beautifulconversation to have in a time
spot like the beginning of ayear, because that's when people
should be really consideringtheir career path and their
goals and what it is that theywant to achieve.
But before we get there, Ialways like to introduce our
guests or allow them tointroduce themselves to our
(02:48):
audience, so people can get toknow, like and trust them.
So could you share a little bitabout?
Speaker 3 (02:54):
Tammy yes, happy to do so, and without getting too
much into work.
I spent my career on WallStreet.
I was a managing director,managing thousands of people,
and that was really what I didfor a living until I didn't want
to anymore.
And I remember having this daywhere I just suddenly everything
I loved I hated and I decidedto do something radical.
(03:16):
So I pulled the plug on mycareer on Wall Street.
I moved to a tropical islandoff the coast of Belize in
Central America and started thiscompany about seven years ago.
I love adventure.
I'm a big scuba diver hiker,you know we love all the things
that are in nature and so livingin Belize for five years really
(03:36):
gave us that opportunity tohave a massive reset and off the
payroll.
So the timing was perfect forme and I just decided it was
time to do something reallydifferent.
So today I live in Mexico city.
So we were in Belize for fiveyears and then I started to miss
this big city life.
You know the crocodiles werefun, but it was no time to go to
(03:59):
a different wildlife and and sonow we're talking while I'm
here in Mexico city in our home.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
That is fabulous.
The fact that you pulled theplug, made a decision, because
people would probably think,like, what are you doing, giving
up a Wall Street job anddisappearing to a tropical
island?
Yet let me ask you, what wasthe real motivation behind doing
that, as far as you needing toreally be true to yourself and
(04:31):
what it is that you were lookingfor in your life, not just in
the grind of work?
Speaker 3 (04:38):
Yeah, and I think the reason I pulled the plug is
because I finally put my lifefirst.
I pulled the plug is because Ifinally put my life first.
I had been chasing the nextpromotion, the next big project,
the next big bonus, the nextbig everything for decades.
And while it served me and myfamily very well throughout the
years, I just really felt likeit became soulless and I felt
(05:01):
like I was in this soul crushinggrind.
And here I am doing the mostterrifying thing I think I've
done in my entire life and I'vedone some really weird stuff.
But you know, the guy that I'vebeen casually dating, you know,
for years, decided we actuallyliked each other.
So we were moving in togetherand we moved together to a
foreign country and I startedthis own business.
And so while I'm heading intoall these uncharted territories,
(05:23):
territories where I'm reallyfeeling over my skis, my friends
were asking me why are yougiving up?
I was like what?
Because there you are at thecorner office, the big C-suite
job, the big title and it's whateverybody aspires to.
And when you finally get thereand you look around and you're
like I don't like this anymoreand I'm going to do something
(05:43):
really different.
And so I think that wasinteresting, because when you
mentioned like leaving that, somany people looked at it like I
was giving up, whereas I lookedat it as I'm taking on one of
the biggest adventures and oneof the biggest challenges in my
life.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
Do you think you had to reach a certain age in order
to kind of recognize that.
And you know, with all theexperience and with all the you
know do's and don'ts andfailures and successes, or can
our younger, you know, careerprofessionals also work to
(06:16):
assess what it is that theyreally want out of their career
and their life and therefore,you know, make those changes and
go after those things.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
The reason I was able to do this with relative ease
in terms of I didn't spend yearsthinking about it, it was, you
know, a few months of decisionmaking is because I had spent my
entire career living this way,and there's seasonality in
everyone's career, right?
So acknowledge that, like I wasable to take bigger risks when I
was younger, you know, when mydaughter was born and I was the
(06:49):
only breadwinner my husband wasa stay-at-home dad then I had to
throttle back a little bit andI was a little more risk adverse
, and then, once things gotstable again, I was able to play
bigger.
And so, throughout my career, Ihad 11 different functions.
I led everything from sales toaudit and everything in between
in five different industries inand around Wall Street, and I
(07:12):
think the mindset that I had wasthat if I didn't like it, then
change it.
So, instead of sitting andgriping and moaning about why
this new boss is a jerk or why Ididn't get promoted, or why
this or why that, I'm like, okay, I like this, we're going to do
something different, and thatmuscle that you build and that
resilience that you build overtime allows you to play bigger
(07:35):
when you can and to still makethose really important changes,
to take control over your careerwhen you've got to hedge a
little bit and when you don'thave as much flexibility.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
Many people listening and watching would say but I
don't have that control, I don'thave that ability to navigate
where my career is going.
My boss or HR or someone elseis making those decisions for me
and is carving out those paths.
Is that a true concept or arethey just kind of telling
(08:11):
themselves and making excusesfor themselves not taking
control of their careers?
Speaker 3 (08:17):
The reality is it's one of the biggest lies that we
tell ourselves.
When you start to make onesimple shift, everything changes
, and what we talk about whatI've always done is if you treat
your career like a business andeveryone that's listening today
gets a promotion because youare now the CEO of you when you
(08:43):
are able to do that and stepinto your career like it is a
business, then everythingchanges.
All of a sudden, you stoptaking the doormat projects that
aren't going to pay youanything extra in the hopes that
you might get a bigger bonus.
Or you stop doing all thisextra work with an idea that
will make it up to you later,like if one of my clients said I
(09:03):
need you to do a significantamount of work and I'm probably
going to be able to pay youFebruary, March of next year.
As a business owner, I'd belike sorry, no, but as an
employee, we do this all thetime, and so we talk about when.
That's your business.
You want to make sure that yourskills are in high demand and
(09:24):
that you're solving a realproblem for your customers,
which is your employer, and thatyou've got a rock star sales
team, which are all yourstakeholders and sponsors that
say good things about you whenyou're not in the room and that
you've got a strong marketingplan, because people inside and
outside your company need toknow about you.
So we tend to put things oncruise control and leave it up
(09:46):
to everyone else, and then feeldisenfranchised when the system
fails us.
But here's an analogy I wantour listeners to think about
today the system paves the roadsfor you to drive on and the
system sets the guardrails soyou don't go over the cliff.
And the system even sets thespeed limit, so you don't go
over the cliff and the systemeven sets the speed limit, but
(10:07):
you are the one driving the carand you get to decide what road
you take.
You get to decide how fastyou're really going to drive and
, more importantly, you get todecide what music you're putting
on the radio.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
It's perfect.
I'm a very visual person, so itabsolutely ties directly to
this subject.
However, it kind of beep, beep,beep for me, all right.
So the first thing would be Ican't say no to my boss.
If they come to me and say theyneed me to do X, y and Z, I
(10:41):
can't say no to my boss.
How do you suggest they handlethat?
But at the same time, theydon't know how to say no, to set
those boundaries and to createthat path for themselves.
Speaker 3 (10:54):
Yeah, so you're right , you can't say no to your boss,
but what you can say is yes andBecause.
When you say I can do this andthere's things that I need in
return, then that level's aplaying field, trust me.
When you know, when I was incorporate, I think one of the
(11:16):
biggest things that was hard tounderstand, especially as I
started to really understand howthings were done.
Right, because at my level, Ihad access to everyone's
salaries who got promoted, wherethe bonuses went, the board
meetings, what happens behindclosed doors, and you will be
shocked at what really actuallyhappens.
And when we treat our careerlike a business, we need to do
(11:36):
that realizing that we're notbeing disloyal to the
organization because it is acommercial arrangement.
They are paying money for goodsand services that you're
providing in exchange for yourcompensation and your benefits
and all that stuff.
But when you think about it, howdo companies buy things?
They buy things based on thereturn on investment what is the
(11:58):
most I can get for the leastamount of money, not what's the
cheapest, not what's the mostexpensive, but where's the value
amount of money, not what's thecheapest, not what's the most
expensive, but where's the value.
So if you're delivering thisvalue to the organization, they
actually expect to pay for it,but only when you stand up for
yourself and say that this issomething that deserves more.
(12:18):
So, whether it's getting rid ofa project that's a dead end
project because you need to dosomething else, whether it's,
you know, saying yes and I wouldlike to do this, you know when
I do this, I need this tooWhether it's exposure to more
senior leadership, whether it'sgetting one of your projects off
the ground that hasn't had asponsorship.
So there's all kinds of thingsthat you can do to negotiate by
saying yes and.
(12:40):
And.
So I think you know and wethink that, oh, they're going to
look bad at me or I'm going tobe in trouble.
And so I think you know and wethink that, oh, they're going to
look bad at me, or I'm going tobe in trouble or they're going
to fire me.
The reality is they're comingto you because you know what
you're doing, and so you knowwhen they don't come to you is
when you should worry.
Then this is your bestopportunity to negotiate.
But you don't, because we havethis fear of the unknown that
we're going to be seen asdisloyal, when the reality is,
(13:01):
they're expecting to pay andthey're expecting trade-offs.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
You just have to ask for them, and aren't they
expecting you to ask and step upand kind of advocate for
yourself?
And they see it as weakness ifyou don't.
Speaker 3 (13:17):
In many cases that's true, right, Some of us have
bosses that don't like to havepeople smarter than them on
their team, right?
So if you're in those kinds ofsituations, you need to step a
little carefully.
The reality is, when you makesure that the things that you do
best are aligned to thecompany's top goals and that
you're using those skills toreally help the company achieve
(13:38):
those goals, and whatever weightis within your span of control,
no matter how high or low youare in the organization, you're
going to be a value propositionand with that you've got a lot
of, and that you think you do.
And when you take that babystep and realize it worked, then
you get to take another one.
You know great examples.
(13:59):
One of my clients had.
She's been with a largeorganization for a long time and
she's had, I think when westarted working together, she
had maybe 13 lateral moves andmore and more work every time.
And so finally, with ourcoaching, I'm like you say no
this time.
Unless you get that promotion,unless you get that next level
(14:21):
up, unless you get the money,the benefits, the office that
comes with it, the answer is no,thank you.
And so she did.
And guess what she got it.
They were shocked because sheactually stood up for herself.
But if she had done that 10times ago, she would have gotten
it then too.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
Should they also be looking to advocate for
themselves up front in thatnegotiation, prior to then
taking it on and waiting on theback end to say you know what, I
think my work deserves a bonuspromotion.
You know it would solve a lotof the stress and the anxiety
(14:59):
and the disgruntled attitudethat one might have in taking on
new and more without anythingin return.
Speaker 3 (15:08):
Absolutely.
You should always negotiateupfront and most of the time,
realize you're not going to beable to get what you want in the
first conversation.
But what you've done now isyou've set the stage right.
And I am telling you right now,exceptions are made every day
for the right people in theright circumstances, and so when
your boss is saying, well, hrwon't let me do that, that's
(15:31):
crap, right, hr is there to tellyou the rules and to tell you
what happens if you break them.
But you know, I'm a break therules kind of girl, and so HR
was an advisor, not my, not mypolice officer, and so I'm like
understood, I'm doing thisanyway.
It's like, okay, because I'mthe business owner, I'm the, I'm
the leader, and so you know.
(15:51):
So your leaders have theability to do this if they want
to.
So if you're getting pushbackor you're getting the common, hr
won't let me, or it's againstpolicy or whatever, then you
need to realize that there's away around this, because the
rules apply to everyone but me.
That's kind of how I alwayslooked at it.
I'm like, oh, that's nice foreverybody else, but that's not
what we're talking about here,and so, but again, you've got to
(16:14):
go back to that valueproposition.
You know what's your value tothe organization and how does
that impact the company'sbiggest goals.
Because if you can keepdoubling down and trading on
that, you've got a lot morewiggle room.
So let's say you want apromotion, but promotion cycles
don't happen, right?
You know every time then that,yes, it's like, okay, well, I
understand that you're going toput me up for promotion, but how
(16:34):
can we guarantee I get it?
Because you're not the only onethat has to say yes, it's all
of your peers.
What can we do to get me infront of your peers?
So next review cycle, I'm inpole position to be able to do
this.
So don't just take yes and moveaway and be whew, thank
goodness, that awkwardconversation was over.
Go deeper into figure.
Go deeper and to figure out howyou actually get those deferred
yeses over the finish line orwhat could be in the way, and
(16:58):
then try and get ahead of thatas you can.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
You mentioned stakeholders, and I'm going to
throw some advocates andsponsors in there as well, for
those listening or watching whomay not necessarily have been
putting themselves in theposition to go and seek them out
.
What can you share with themaround?
Who advocates, are,stakeholders, sponsors are?
Speaker 3 (17:23):
Sure, absolutely, because the reality is for you
to get anything, then that meanssomebody else in the
organization isn't getting theirpart right.
When we have bonus dollars,bonus dollars are fixed, and so
most of the companies do notpeanut butter it around, right?
You get a percentage based onyour contribution.
So let's say, it's at 10% Foryou to get 12, somebody else is
(17:45):
getting eight, you know.
And so for you to win, someonehas to lose in this, you know.
In this equation.
So the secret is you want tomake sure that you've got enough
people saying good things aboutyou in the room when you're not
there, and they need to be atyour boss's level and one level
above.
And so many of us stay in ourdepartments or we stay in our
(18:06):
lane or we do these things, andthen we wonder why no one has
ever heard of us, even thoughwe're awesome at what we do.
So here's a great way to solvethat.
It's doing what I call astakeholder heat map, and so
what you do is you put your bossand their peers, you put the
people that are at that levelwithin your organization that
(18:27):
you have to work with.
So maybe it's finance or techor HR or legal or marketing or
product development or whatever.
So the ones that you interactwith, you wanna put those people
on that heat map as well.
And then you want to order themin terms of impact and
influence.
So the ones who have thebiggest influence go on the top,
the ones that no one listens togo on the bottom.
(18:48):
And then, once you have thatstraight, then you need to color
code them red, yellow or green,and so green is that you have a
great working relationship withthem, they can speak to your.
Yellow is that you've had alittle bit of experience with
them, but they really wouldn'tgo to bat for you instead of one
of their own people.
And then red is these peoplecan't pick you out of a crowd of
(19:11):
one.
And then, based on theinfluence number in terms of
what, where they fall on thelist and those color codes,
start to build a plan to domeaningful work with those
people.
So it's not just a fly by, let'shave coffee and waste
everyone's time.
It's having a meeting thatactually shows that you've got a
strong business acumen and thatyou're there to help.
(19:33):
So, for example, if they're onyour list, then you interact
with them somehow, with yourdepartment, because no one is
insular.
So an easy conversation wouldbe like what are some of the
things that my team is doingthat's not making your life
easier that I should know about?
I mean, this is unsolicited.
You're going to another leadersaying how can I help my team
(19:54):
make your life easier?
Now, all of a sudden, you're arock star right, especially if
you not only take thatinformation but do something
about it, and so these are easyways to really start to expand
what I call your power base.
And then, once you've done that, then all of a sudden these
conversations, mobility withinan organization and being seen
as the person that everybodywants on their team becomes much
(20:16):
easier.
Speaker 1 (20:17):
Now I'm going to take a right-hand turn on something
that, because I, again, I'mvisual and I'm just imagining
these interactions with people,and you even made the comment
about there's some managers whodon't want people that are
smarter than them on their team.
Now you were considered, fromwhat I understand, you were
(20:39):
considered the velvet hammer,and you weren't aware that
that's how people wereperceiving you.
So can you give that backstory?
And therefore, then, how didyou address that?
Speaker 3 (20:55):
Yeah, absolutely.
And I was shocked, right.
And then and there's the storyof it's also in the book, right
so we had had a hell of aproject and it was a multi-year
thing that was just dead onarrival.
And that's what my team did is,we did transformation and we
did the hard and scary stuff.
And so I took my team out justto blow off some steam.
So we all had way too muchtequila and way too many buffalo
wings.
(21:15):
And then, all of a sudden, fromthis crowded table, in this
really noisy bar, one of mymanagers says do you know what
we call you?
And I was like, oh, I was likeI don't know if I want to know
this, but I was drunk enough toask.
I'm like no, what do you callit?
He's like we call you thevelvet hammer, the velvet hammer
.
And initially I bristled, I waslike what?
And then somebody else piped in.
(21:36):
It's like, because whenever youhave to beat us upside the head
, you do it, but it never hurts.
And I was like oh, okay, Ithink that's the best thing
anybody's ever said to me,especially on wall street.
And I didn't know that was mybrand, because my brand was we
had fun.
You know you hear laughter outof the conference room and
everybody's like what's going on, you know.
(21:56):
But you know if you screwed up,then you were held accountable
and it was never fun, right.
And so I got actually that.
I thought that brand worked wellfor me because it was actually
true.
Like you know, yes, we're goingto do the hard things, but it
doesn't have to hurt as much.
But the reality is I didn't dothat on purpose.
That actually happened onaccident, and after that I
(22:18):
learned I need to be much moreintentional with how I'm showing
up and how people areperceiving me, to make sure that
I'm getting the best out ofeveryone.
Because, unfortunately, thatVelvet Hammer brand terrified
many people, and so thatprevented them from coming to me
and talking about like warningsigns of what's happening that
could go wrong, or challengingideas, because they just didn't
(22:41):
want to.
You know, they just feltuncomfortable with it.
And so if you don't build yourbrand purposefully and with
intention, others will do it foryou, and so I think that's the
most important takeaway there isI got lucky because the
environment I was in that playedwell, but as I moved on into
more senior levels and as Ineeded to reach a broader area
of people and have much moreinput, then I definitely had to
(23:05):
change how I showed up, and sobrands are going to happen with
or without you, so you want tohold the pen on that.
Speaker 1 (23:11):
As you can tell from the name of this podcast, my
brand was the corporate bitch.
Yeah, so you want to kind ofget in tune with the perception
others have of you because in mycase, I was oblivious to the
fact that I was that way.
However, that said, how doesone navigate, kind of taking
(23:37):
control of their brand, of theircareer path, of what it is?
Team?
How do they handle that andfeel as if, okay, I can feel
(23:58):
like I'm valued and that I havea future?
Speaker 3 (24:02):
Right.
And so step one especially ifyou like the organization, you
like the team that you're on,you know the boss is a bit wonky
.
If you can be the bridgebetween what your boss wants
personally and where they are,then that will change right.
Most bosses that don't like tohave people that are quote
unquote smarter than them ontheir team are afraid right,
(24:22):
they're afraid you're gonna makethem look bad or that you'll
look better than them orwhatever.
Right, go aside and know thatyour wins are their wins and at
the end of the day, it's goingto benefit you significantly
more doing it this way and youbecome that bridge to what they
want personally, because it'snot always obvious what they
want.
Sometimes they just want to beable to have an uninterrupted
(24:45):
meal with their family, right,and so taking some of the
nonsense off their plate.
Sometimes they want to getpromoted, but they need to get a
hard project done that no one'swilling to do, and so you know,
I think step one is to reallybe that bridge, and when you can
do that, then what you'll findis you move to their confidence,
and so you're the one thathears about everything before
(25:05):
your team members do.
You're the one that they startbrainstorming with and saying
what do you think about thisidea before I go out with it
with everyone else?
Because there's that trust.
You know that doesn't alwayswork, but it's a great first
step and so if that doesn't work, it's time to move, because if
you are working with someone whois going to gate and block your
success and your growth, don'tstay Right, and so there's tons
(25:29):
of opportunities either withinthe organization you know or
externally, right in terms ofthat.
So that's when it's time to youknow.
Take a good hard look at thisand say, all right, kind of, put
me first, if I had a customerwho monopolized all my time and
paid me very little money for itor very little growth or very
little recognition, I have tobreak up with that customer as a
(25:50):
business, right, because it'snot good for the long-term
growth.
So again, you're the CEO of youInc.
And is this client aka yourboss good for your company or
not.
Speaker 1 (26:02):
However, I'm even getting some rash recalling my
early days of my own businessleaving corporate, in that
people feel desperate that theycan't walk away because the
company has good benefits, hasgood pay I'm not going to find
another job like this and or, ifthey are a business owner, that
(26:25):
they can't walk away from aclient because I need that
income.
Where does one find thatcourage within themselves to
take that step?
Speaker 3 (26:37):
Yeah, it is terrifying, it's not right.
I was, you know, the biggestlike emotionally.
I like, when I first startedthis business, like every
customer that bought from me, Iwas unstoppable.
Every prospect that said no, Iwas never going to make another
sale again.
I mean, you know, the first twoyears were just a disaster
emotionally, and thankfully, mypartner, steve, had his own
(26:59):
business for like decades, andso he was able to talk me off
the ledge very often, which Ineeded, you know.
But from a corporate perspectiveand from a business perspective
, I think there's a couplethings that give us courage.
The first thing is to realizethat, you know, a lot of times
our relationship with successand failure are messed up.
(27:19):
You know, we try and avoidfailure at every opportunity,
but the reality is, you cannotsucceed without having failed.
So if you're avoiding failure,you are preventing success.
And so, you know, so many of usare like I don't want to look
bad, I don't want to lose face,but yet in the next breath, all
(27:42):
of us would say I learned morefrom my mistakes than from my
wins.
And so I think we need to getcomfortable with the idea, first
of all, that nothing is sobinary as success or fail.
Nothing is that black and white.
Everything we do has someelements that worked and some
elements that didn't, and wecontrol the narrative Like 2024
(28:03):
was a great year for CareerBurner Circle, but was it
perfect?
No, did I make lots of mistakes?
Oh my goodness, yes.
And did every idea work?
Oh my God, no.
However, you know it's againthat narrative.
You focus on the things thatworked and you realize, okay,
we're gonna have to tweak thethings that we didn't.
And that comes down to what Icall an experimental mindset.
So if you've got this binarytake the hill, no matter what
(28:26):
and you know there's landmineseverywhere, but you're still
going to do this then you aresetting yourself up for a long
road of frustration.
But if you take smaller stepsand say I'm going to have this
experimental mindset where it'slike what does this button do?
And if I push that button, whathappens?
And then take that and keep thestuff that worked, get rid of
(28:47):
the things that didn't and tryagain.
And when you do these smalliterations and when you don't
turn this into some catastrophicyou know, pass, fail situation,
you're going to find thatyou've got the courage and the
resilience to do a lot more.
And the one thing I heard duringCOVID, my business had to take
a major pivot right.
I was doing all private workand in my business demand went
(29:10):
through the roof, but no onewould pay my rates anymore.
So I was like I got to figurethis out and so I did this.
I was stuck in the UK and itwas the whole thing.
And so I did this five-daychallenge with Tony Robbins and
Dean Graziosi, and Dean saidsomething that stuck with me.
He's like you have theresilience and if you knew that
you had to fail 36 times to getwhat you wanted, you do it
(29:31):
because you knew the 36th timeyou'd get it.
But the issue is we don't knowhow many times we have to fail
before we get where we want togo, and too many people stop at
the 34th or the 35th time, notrealizing that that last push is
what gets you where you want togo.
And so I think a little graceand a lot of humor and you know,
and that experimental mindsetand realizing that failure is
(29:53):
not the enemy and that failureis not absolute, gives us that
courage that we need to takethose bold actions for ourselves
.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
And take control.
Break the rules.
Break the rules and loveMondays again.
Speaker 3 (30:07):
Well, that's what it's all about, right?
And people thought I was crazy.
I'm like no, everyone deservesto love Mondays.
That's why we do what we dohere at CWC, because people
think it's a pipe dream, butwhen you step into it, your
whole life changes and it's justabsolutely amazing.
Speaker 1 (30:21):
So what would one tip or one piece of advice you
would give our listeners andviewers when it comes to
learning to love Mondays again?
Speaker 3 (30:33):
I think that the best tip I want to leave everybody
with is to think about what areyour most best skills, not what
are the things that are mostmarketable, but what are the
things that you can do for 12hours a day and end the day more
energized than when you started.
For me, it's coaching, it'sbeing on stages, it's doing
(30:55):
podcasts, it's working with ourother coaches.
I love that stuff.
I mean I can do marketing andsales and organic and social and
all that stuff.
But after about an hour or twoI'm sitting in my chair throwing
puzzles at the ceiling Right.
So first of all, step one is tofigure out what lights you up.
Step two is to do more of thatevery day figure out what lights
(31:15):
you up.
Speaker 1 (31:16):
Step two is to do more of that every day.
Love it, absolutely love it.
Speaker 3 (31:23):
They always say find what you love and you'll never
work a day in your life.
I agree, and not all of us havethe luxury of doing every day
Like I have to do stuff I don'tlike.
Right, it's called adulting.
But if you can find small waysto put the things that you love
most into your day, then you'regoing to find that those Mondays
are much easier to face andthat you start to really look
forward to it.
And over time you get into thissituation where you can
(31:44):
actually create the role aroundwhat you love to do and that's
the ultimate right Is to be ableto lean into that to help the
company reach their goals doingthe things that you do and love
most.
Speaker 1 (31:55):
I love that Everyone.
Please check out her bookEscaping the Career Traps.
You can find it on Amazon aswell as her website, which I
will remind you iscareerwinnercirclecom.
And then, of course, follow heron LinkedIn and go to her
website and make sure you learnall about her and what she's,
(32:16):
what she does and how she couldsupport you.
Tammy, this has been fabulous.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Thank you so much Such a pleasure.
Thanks for the invite.
I've loved our conversationtoday and then I heard the name
of the podcast.
I'm like I have got to be onthis one.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
I did too, and I will look forward to having everyone
reach out to you and learn moreabout you at
careerwinnercirclecom.
Speaker 3 (32:42):
Thanks, tammy, thank you very much, you bet.
Speaker 1 (32:46):
Now, that was a powerhouse conversation with
Tammy Alvarez of Career WinnerCircle.
We cover a whole gamut oftopics, but I want to mention a
few of them that you can makenote, maybe even set a goal
around and really start actingon so you can be building a
powerhouse career.
One of the first things is shetalked about advocates and
(33:09):
sponsors those individuals thatwill talk to others about you
when you're not in the room.
They'll advocate for newprojects, for promotions, for
new opportunities and therefore,if you don't have stakeholders
or advocates in your corner,then she talked about a
stakeholder's heat map, and it'sa great tool to use to really
(33:34):
prioritize those individualsthat could be helping the
trajectory of your career.
The next thing is she gave herscenario of being labeled or
branded the Velvet Hammer, andthe emphasis was on you needing
to define and to act on andbuild your own brand before
(33:57):
others create your brand for you.
There was a lot that I made noteof and that Tammy brought up so
(34:18):
you can navigate, control andreally drive your direction of
your career path, and so shareit with your team.
Make note if you have to go backand listen to it again, make
note for yourself and be surethat you are putting into place
what is needed in order for youto really have that powerhouse
career so you can love Mondaysagain, even if that means you
have to break some rules, asTammy says.
(34:38):
Now, if you are having anychallenges over and above what
we talked about today and youcould use some support in
handling them and navigatingthem, then please feel free to
even reach out to me and let'shave a conversation.
You can go tocoachmebernadettecom.
Forward slash discovery calland I'd be more than happy to
understand what the challengesthat you're having and provide
(34:59):
you tips and strategies to helpyou move forward so you can be
the powerhouse leader you'remeant to be.
Thank you for being with usthis week and I'll look forward
to having you right back herefor another episode of Shedding
the Corporate Bitch.
Bye.
Speaker 2 (35:18):
Thank you for tuning into today's episode of Shedding
the Corporate Bitch.
Every journey taken together isanother step towards unleashing
the powerhouse leader withinyou.
Don't miss any of our weeklyepisodes.
Subscribe to our podcast onApple Podcasts, spotify or
wherever you love to listen.
And, for those who thrive onvisual content, catch us on our
Shedding the Bitch YouTubechannel.
Want to dive deeper withBernadette on becoming a
(35:40):
powerhouse leader?
Visit balloffirecoachingcom tolearn more about how she helps
professionals, hr executives andteam leaders elevate overall
team performance.
You've been listening toShedding the Corporate Bitch
with Bernadette Boas.
Until next time, keep shedding,keep growing and keep leading.
Have you ever hit a wall in your career?
Maybe you found yourselfwondering if it's time to
rebuild, accelerate or simplytake a different approach to the
work that you do every day.
Whether it's reconsidering whoyou're working with, how you're
leading, or even redefining yourrole within the same company,
one thing's clear Building acareer over 10, 20, or 30 years
(00:25):
can feel daunting and downrightexhausting.
But don't worry.
Today's episode is aboutreigniting that spark.
Our guest, tiffany Alvarez ofCareer Winner Circle, is here to
share her proven strategies tohelp you take control,
accelerate your career and stepinto the role of an empowered
business leader.
(00:45):
Tiffany believes your careershould be treated like a
thriving business, one whereyou're always making bold
strategic decisions to keep itgrowing.
She'll show you how torediscover the excitement of
making a big impact and lovingevery Monday morning again.
So grab a cup of coffee, leanin and get ready to rethink your
career plan.
(01:06):
Stay with us and loving everyMonday morning again.
So grab a cup of coffee, leanin and get ready to rethink your
career plan.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
Stay with us, come here.
Welcome to Shedding theCorporate Bitch, the podcast
(01:30):
that transforms today's managersinto tomorrow's powerhouse
leaders.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Your host.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Bernadette Boas, executive coach and author,
brings you into a world wherethe corporate grind meets
personal growth and success ineach and every episode.
With more than 25 years incorporate trenches, bernadette's
own journey from beingdismissed as a tyrant boss to
becoming a sought-afterleadership coach and speaker
illustrates the very essence oftransformation that she now
inspires in others with her tips, strategies and stories.
(01:54):
So if you're ready to shed thebitches of fear and insecurity,
ditch the imposter syndrome andstep into the role of the
powerhouse leader you were bornto be, this podcast is for you.
Let's do this.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
Tammy, welcome, welcome, welcome.
How are you?
It's awesome to see you.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
Thank you so much.
This is my first podcastrecording of the new year
probably for you too, I'mguessing.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Yes, me too.
I think this is a beautifulconversation to have in a time
spot like the beginning of ayear, because that's when people
should be really consideringtheir career path and their
goals and what it is that theywant to achieve.
But before we get there, Ialways like to introduce our
guests or allow them tointroduce themselves to our
(02:48):
audience, so people can get toknow, like and trust them.
So could you share a little bitabout?
Speaker 3 (02:54):
Tammy yes, happy to do so, and without getting too
much into work.
I spent my career on WallStreet.
I was a managing director,managing thousands of people,
and that was really what I didfor a living until I didn't want
to anymore.
And I remember having this daywhere I just suddenly everything
I loved I hated and I decidedto do something radical.
(03:16):
So I pulled the plug on mycareer on Wall Street.
I moved to a tropical islandoff the coast of Belize in
Central America and started thiscompany about seven years ago.
I love adventure.
I'm a big scuba diver hiker,you know we love all the things
that are in nature and so livingin Belize for five years really
(03:36):
gave us that opportunity tohave a massive reset and off the
payroll.
So the timing was perfect forme and I just decided it was
time to do something reallydifferent.
So today I live in Mexico city.
So we were in Belize for fiveyears and then I started to miss
this big city life.
You know the crocodiles werefun, but it was no time to go to
(03:59):
a different wildlife and and sonow we're talking while I'm
here in Mexico city in our home.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
That is fabulous.
The fact that you pulled theplug, made a decision, because
people would probably think,like, what are you doing, giving
up a Wall Street job anddisappearing to a tropical
island?
Yet let me ask you, what wasthe real motivation behind doing
that, as far as you needing toreally be true to yourself and
(04:31):
what it is that you were lookingfor in your life, not just in
the grind of work?
Speaker 3 (04:38):
Yeah, and I think the reason I pulled the plug is
because I finally put my lifefirst.
I pulled the plug is because Ifinally put my life first.
I had been chasing the nextpromotion, the next big project,
the next big bonus, the nextbig everything for decades.
And while it served me and myfamily very well throughout the
years, I just really felt likeit became soulless and I felt
(05:01):
like I was in this soul crushinggrind.
And here I am doing the mostterrifying thing I think I've
done in my entire life and I'vedone some really weird stuff.
But you know, the guy that I'vebeen casually dating, you know,
for years, decided we actuallyliked each other.
So we were moving in togetherand we moved together to a
foreign country and I startedthis own business.
And so while I'm heading intoall these uncharted territories,
(05:23):
territories where I'm reallyfeeling over my skis, my friends
were asking me why are yougiving up?
I was like what?
Because there you are at thecorner office, the big C-suite
job, the big title and it's whateverybody aspires to.
And when you finally get thereand you look around and you're
like I don't like this anymoreand I'm going to do something
(05:43):
really different.
And so I think that wasinteresting, because when you
mentioned like leaving that, somany people looked at it like I
was giving up, whereas I lookedat it as I'm taking on one of
the biggest adventures and oneof the biggest challenges in my
life.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
Do you think you had to reach a certain age in order
to kind of recognize that.
And you know, with all theexperience and with all the you
know do's and don'ts andfailures and successes, or can
our younger, you know, careerprofessionals also work to
(06:16):
assess what it is that theyreally want out of their career
and their life and therefore,you know, make those changes and
go after those things.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
The reason I was able to do this with relative ease
in terms of I didn't spend yearsthinking about it, it was, you
know, a few months of decisionmaking is because I had spent my
entire career living this way,and there's seasonality in
everyone's career, right?
So acknowledge that, like I wasable to take bigger risks when I
was younger, you know, when mydaughter was born and I was the
(06:49):
only breadwinner my husband wasa stay-at-home dad then I had to
throttle back a little bit andI was a little more risk adverse
, and then, once things gotstable again, I was able to play
bigger.
And so, throughout my career, Ihad 11 different functions.
I led everything from sales toaudit and everything in between
in five different industries inand around Wall Street, and I
(07:12):
think the mindset that I had wasthat if I didn't like it, then
change it.
So, instead of sitting andgriping and moaning about why
this new boss is a jerk or why Ididn't get promoted, or why
this or why that, I'm like, okay, I like this, we're going to do
something different, and thatmuscle that you build and that
resilience that you build overtime allows you to play bigger
(07:35):
when you can and to still makethose really important changes,
to take control over your careerwhen you've got to hedge a
little bit and when you don'thave as much flexibility.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
Many people listening and watching would say but I
don't have that control, I don'thave that ability to navigate
where my career is going.
My boss or HR or someone elseis making those decisions for me
and is carving out those paths.
Is that a true concept or arethey just kind of telling
(08:11):
themselves and making excusesfor themselves not taking
control of their careers?
Speaker 3 (08:17):
The reality is it's one of the biggest lies that we
tell ourselves.
When you start to make onesimple shift, everything changes
, and what we talk about whatI've always done is if you treat
your career like a business andeveryone that's listening today
gets a promotion because youare now the CEO of you when you
(08:43):
are able to do that and stepinto your career like it is a
business, then everythingchanges.
All of a sudden, you stoptaking the doormat projects that
aren't going to pay youanything extra in the hopes that
you might get a bigger bonus.
Or you stop doing all thisextra work with an idea that
will make it up to you later,like if one of my clients said I
(09:03):
need you to do a significantamount of work and I'm probably
going to be able to pay youFebruary, March of next year.
As a business owner, I'd belike sorry, no, but as an
employee, we do this all thetime, and so we talk about when.
That's your business.
You want to make sure that yourskills are in high demand and
(09:24):
that you're solving a realproblem for your customers,
which is your employer, and thatyou've got a rock star sales
team, which are all yourstakeholders and sponsors that
say good things about you whenyou're not in the room and that
you've got a strong marketingplan, because people inside and
outside your company need toknow about you.
So we tend to put things oncruise control and leave it up
(09:46):
to everyone else, and then feeldisenfranchised when the system
fails us.
But here's an analogy I wantour listeners to think about
today the system paves the roadsfor you to drive on and the
system sets the guardrails soyou don't go over the cliff.
And the system even sets thespeed limit, so you don't go
over the cliff and the systemeven sets the speed limit, but
(10:07):
you are the one driving the carand you get to decide what road
you take.
You get to decide how fastyou're really going to drive and
, more importantly, you get todecide what music you're putting
on the radio.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
It's perfect.
I'm a very visual person, so itabsolutely ties directly to
this subject.
However, it kind of beep, beep,beep for me, all right.
So the first thing would be Ican't say no to my boss.
If they come to me and say theyneed me to do X, y and Z, I
(10:41):
can't say no to my boss.
How do you suggest they handlethat?
But at the same time, theydon't know how to say no, to set
those boundaries and to createthat path for themselves.
Speaker 3 (10:54):
Yeah, so you're right , you can't say no to your boss,
but what you can say is yes andBecause.
When you say I can do this andthere's things that I need in
return, then that level's aplaying field, trust me.
When you know, when I was incorporate, I think one of the
(11:16):
biggest things that was hard tounderstand, especially as I
started to really understand howthings were done.
Right, because at my level, Ihad access to everyone's
salaries who got promoted, wherethe bonuses went, the board
meetings, what happens behindclosed doors, and you will be
shocked at what really actuallyhappens.
And when we treat our careerlike a business, we need to do
(11:36):
that realizing that we're notbeing disloyal to the
organization because it is acommercial arrangement.
They are paying money for goodsand services that you're
providing in exchange for yourcompensation and your benefits
and all that stuff.
But when you think about it, howdo companies buy things?
They buy things based on thereturn on investment what is the
(11:58):
most I can get for the leastamount of money, not what's the
cheapest, not what's the mostexpensive, but where's the value
amount of money, not what's thecheapest, not what's the most
expensive, but where's the value.
So if you're delivering thisvalue to the organization, they
actually expect to pay for it,but only when you stand up for
yourself and say that this issomething that deserves more.
(12:18):
So, whether it's getting rid ofa project that's a dead end
project because you need to dosomething else, whether it's,
you know, saying yes and I wouldlike to do this, you know when
I do this, I need this tooWhether it's exposure to more
senior leadership, whether it'sgetting one of your projects off
the ground that hasn't had asponsorship.
So there's all kinds of thingsthat you can do to negotiate by
saying yes and.
(12:40):
And.
So I think you know and wethink that, oh, they're going to
look bad at me or I'm going tobe in trouble.
And so I think you know and wethink that, oh, they're going to
look bad at me, or I'm going tobe in trouble or they're going
to fire me.
The reality is they're comingto you because you know what
you're doing, and so you knowwhen they don't come to you is
when you should worry.
Then this is your bestopportunity to negotiate.
But you don't, because we havethis fear of the unknown that
we're going to be seen asdisloyal, when the reality is,
(13:01):
they're expecting to pay andthey're expecting trade-offs.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
You just have to ask for them, and aren't they
expecting you to ask and step upand kind of advocate for
yourself?
And they see it as weakness ifyou don't.
Speaker 3 (13:17):
In many cases that's true, right, Some of us have
bosses that don't like to havepeople smarter than them on
their team, right?
So if you're in those kinds ofsituations, you need to step a
little carefully.
The reality is, when you makesure that the things that you do
best are aligned to thecompany's top goals and that
you're using those skills toreally help the company achieve
(13:38):
those goals, and whatever weightis within your span of control,
no matter how high or low youare in the organization, you're
going to be a value propositionand with that you've got a lot
of, and that you think you do.
And when you take that babystep and realize it worked, then
you get to take another one.
You know great examples.
(13:59):
One of my clients had.
She's been with a largeorganization for a long time and
she's had, I think when westarted working together, she
had maybe 13 lateral moves andmore and more work every time.
And so finally, with ourcoaching, I'm like you say no
this time.
Unless you get that promotion,unless you get that next level
(14:21):
up, unless you get the money,the benefits, the office that
comes with it, the answer is no,thank you.
And so she did.
And guess what she got it.
They were shocked because sheactually stood up for herself.
But if she had done that 10times ago, she would have gotten
it then too.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
Should they also be looking to advocate for
themselves up front in thatnegotiation, prior to then
taking it on and waiting on theback end to say you know what, I
think my work deserves a bonuspromotion.
You know it would solve a lotof the stress and the anxiety
(14:59):
and the disgruntled attitudethat one might have in taking on
new and more without anythingin return.
Speaker 3 (15:08):
Absolutely.
You should always negotiateupfront and most of the time,
realize you're not going to beable to get what you want in the
first conversation.
But what you've done now isyou've set the stage right.
And I am telling you right now,exceptions are made every day
for the right people in theright circumstances, and so when
your boss is saying, well, hrwon't let me do that, that's
(15:31):
crap, right, hr is there to tellyou the rules and to tell you
what happens if you break them.
But you know, I'm a break therules kind of girl, and so HR
was an advisor, not my, not mypolice officer, and so I'm like
understood, I'm doing thisanyway.
It's like, okay, because I'mthe business owner, I'm the, I'm
the leader, and so you know.
(15:51):
So your leaders have theability to do this if they want
to.
So if you're getting pushbackor you're getting the common, hr
won't let me, or it's againstpolicy or whatever, then you
need to realize that there's away around this, because the
rules apply to everyone but me.
That's kind of how I alwayslooked at it.
I'm like, oh, that's nice foreverybody else, but that's not
what we're talking about here,and so, but again, you've got to
(16:14):
go back to that valueproposition.
You know what's your value tothe organization and how does
that impact the company'sbiggest goals.
Because if you can keepdoubling down and trading on
that, you've got a lot morewiggle room.
So let's say you want apromotion, but promotion cycles
don't happen, right?
You know every time then that,yes, it's like, okay, well, I
understand that you're going toput me up for promotion, but how
(16:34):
can we guarantee I get it?
Because you're not the only onethat has to say yes, it's all
of your peers.
What can we do to get me infront of your peers?
So next review cycle, I'm inpole position to be able to do
this.
So don't just take yes and moveaway and be whew, thank
goodness, that awkwardconversation was over.
Go deeper into figure.
Go deeper and to figure out howyou actually get those deferred
yeses over the finish line orwhat could be in the way, and
(16:58):
then try and get ahead of thatas you can.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
You mentioned stakeholders, and I'm going to
throw some advocates andsponsors in there as well, for
those listening or watching whomay not necessarily have been
putting themselves in theposition to go and seek them out
.
What can you share with themaround?
Who advocates, are,stakeholders, sponsors are?
Speaker 3 (17:23):
Sure, absolutely, because the reality is for you
to get anything, then that meanssomebody else in the
organization isn't getting theirpart right.
When we have bonus dollars,bonus dollars are fixed, and so
most of the companies do notpeanut butter it around, right?
You get a percentage based onyour contribution.
So let's say, it's at 10% Foryou to get 12, somebody else is
(17:45):
getting eight, you know.
And so for you to win, someonehas to lose in this, you know.
In this equation.
So the secret is you want tomake sure that you've got enough
people saying good things aboutyou in the room when you're not
there, and they need to be atyour boss's level and one level
above.
And so many of us stay in ourdepartments or we stay in our
(18:06):
lane or we do these things, andthen we wonder why no one has
ever heard of us, even thoughwe're awesome at what we do.
So here's a great way to solvethat.
It's doing what I call astakeholder heat map, and so
what you do is you put your bossand their peers, you put the
people that are at that levelwithin your organization that
(18:27):
you have to work with.
So maybe it's finance or techor HR or legal or marketing or
product development or whatever.
So the ones that you interactwith, you wanna put those people
on that heat map as well.
And then you want to order themin terms of impact and
influence.
So the ones who have thebiggest influence go on the top,
the ones that no one listens togo on the bottom.
(18:48):
And then, once you have thatstraight, then you need to color
code them red, yellow or green,and so green is that you have a
great working relationship withthem, they can speak to your.
Yellow is that you've had alittle bit of experience with
them, but they really wouldn'tgo to bat for you instead of one
of their own people.
And then red is these peoplecan't pick you out of a crowd of
(19:11):
one.
And then, based on theinfluence number in terms of
what, where they fall on thelist and those color codes,
start to build a plan to domeaningful work with those
people.
So it's not just a fly by, let'shave coffee and waste
everyone's time.
It's having a meeting thatactually shows that you've got a
strong business acumen and thatyou're there to help.
(19:33):
So, for example, if they're onyour list, then you interact
with them somehow, with yourdepartment, because no one is
insular.
So an easy conversation wouldbe like what are some of the
things that my team is doingthat's not making your life
easier that I should know about?
I mean, this is unsolicited.
You're going to another leadersaying how can I help my team
(19:54):
make your life easier?
Now, all of a sudden, you're arock star right, especially if
you not only take thatinformation but do something
about it, and so these are easyways to really start to expand
what I call your power base.
And then, once you've done that, then all of a sudden these
conversations, mobility withinan organization and being seen
as the person that everybodywants on their team becomes much
(20:16):
easier.
Speaker 1 (20:17):
Now I'm going to take a right-hand turn on something
that, because I, again, I'mvisual and I'm just imagining
these interactions with people,and you even made the comment
about there's some managers whodon't want people that are
smarter than them on their team.
Now you were considered, fromwhat I understand, you were
(20:39):
considered the velvet hammer,and you weren't aware that
that's how people wereperceiving you.
So can you give that backstory?
And therefore, then, how didyou address that?
Speaker 3 (20:55):
Yeah, absolutely.
And I was shocked, right.
And then and there's the storyof it's also in the book, right
so we had had a hell of aproject and it was a multi-year
thing that was just dead onarrival.
And that's what my team did is,we did transformation and we
did the hard and scary stuff.
And so I took my team out justto blow off some steam.
So we all had way too muchtequila and way too many buffalo
wings.
(21:15):
And then, all of a sudden, fromthis crowded table, in this
really noisy bar, one of mymanagers says do you know what
we call you?
And I was like, oh, I was likeI don't know if I want to know
this, but I was drunk enough toask.
I'm like no, what do you callit?
He's like we call you thevelvet hammer, the velvet hammer
.
And initially I bristled, I waslike what?
And then somebody else piped in.
(21:36):
It's like, because whenever youhave to beat us upside the head
, you do it, but it never hurts.
And I was like oh, okay, Ithink that's the best thing
anybody's ever said to me,especially on wall street.
And I didn't know that was mybrand, because my brand was we
had fun.
You know you hear laughter outof the conference room and
everybody's like what's going on, you know.
(21:56):
But you know if you screwed up,then you were held accountable
and it was never fun, right.
And so I got actually that.
I thought that brand worked wellfor me because it was actually
true.
Like you know, yes, we're goingto do the hard things, but it
doesn't have to hurt as much.
But the reality is I didn't dothat on purpose.
That actually happened onaccident, and after that I
(22:18):
learned I need to be much moreintentional with how I'm showing
up and how people areperceiving me, to make sure that
I'm getting the best out ofeveryone.
Because, unfortunately, thatVelvet Hammer brand terrified
many people, and so thatprevented them from coming to me
and talking about like warningsigns of what's happening that
could go wrong, or challengingideas, because they just didn't
(22:41):
want to.
You know, they just feltuncomfortable with it.
And so if you don't build yourbrand purposefully and with
intention, others will do it foryou, and so I think that's the
most important takeaway there isI got lucky because the
environment I was in that playedwell, but as I moved on into
more senior levels and as Ineeded to reach a broader area
of people and have much moreinput, then I definitely had to
(23:05):
change how I showed up, and sobrands are going to happen with
or without you, so you want tohold the pen on that.
Speaker 1 (23:11):
As you can tell from the name of this podcast, my
brand was the corporate bitch.
Yeah, so you want to kind ofget in tune with the perception
others have of you because in mycase, I was oblivious to the
fact that I was that way.
However, that said, how doesone navigate, kind of taking
(23:37):
control of their brand, of theircareer path, of what it is?
Team?
How do they handle that andfeel as if, okay, I can feel
(23:58):
like I'm valued and that I havea future?
Speaker 3 (24:02):
Right.
And so step one especially ifyou like the organization, you
like the team that you're on,you know the boss is a bit wonky
.
If you can be the bridgebetween what your boss wants
personally and where they are,then that will change right.
Most bosses that don't like tohave people that are quote
unquote smarter than them ontheir team are afraid right,
(24:22):
they're afraid you're gonna makethem look bad or that you'll
look better than them orwhatever.
Right, go aside and know thatyour wins are their wins and at
the end of the day, it's goingto benefit you significantly
more doing it this way and youbecome that bridge to what they
want personally, because it'snot always obvious what they
want.
Sometimes they just want to beable to have an uninterrupted
(24:45):
meal with their family, right,and so taking some of the
nonsense off their plate.
Sometimes they want to getpromoted, but they need to get a
hard project done that no one'swilling to do, and so you know,
I think step one is to reallybe that bridge, and when you can
do that, then what you'll findis you move to their confidence,
and so you're the one thathears about everything before
(25:05):
your team members do.
You're the one that they startbrainstorming with and saying
what do you think about thisidea before I go out with it
with everyone else?
Because there's that trust.
You know that doesn't alwayswork, but it's a great first
step and so if that doesn't work, it's time to move, because if
you are working with someone whois going to gate and block your
success and your growth, don'tstay Right, and so there's tons
(25:29):
of opportunities either withinthe organization you know or
externally, right in terms ofthat.
So that's when it's time to youknow.
Take a good hard look at thisand say, all right, kind of, put
me first, if I had a customerwho monopolized all my time and
paid me very little money for itor very little growth or very
little recognition, I have tobreak up with that customer as a
(25:50):
business, right, because it'snot good for the long-term
growth.
So again, you're the CEO of youInc.
And is this client aka yourboss good for your company or
not.
Speaker 1 (26:02):
However, I'm even getting some rash recalling my
early days of my own businessleaving corporate, in that
people feel desperate that theycan't walk away because the
company has good benefits, hasgood pay I'm not going to find
another job like this and or, ifthey are a business owner, that
(26:25):
they can't walk away from aclient because I need that
income.
Where does one find thatcourage within themselves to
take that step?
Speaker 3 (26:37):
Yeah, it is terrifying, it's not right.
I was, you know, the biggestlike emotionally.
I like, when I first startedthis business, like every
customer that bought from me, Iwas unstoppable.
Every prospect that said no, Iwas never going to make another
sale again.
I mean, you know, the first twoyears were just a disaster
emotionally, and thankfully, mypartner, steve, had his own
(26:59):
business for like decades, andso he was able to talk me off
the ledge very often, which Ineeded, you know.
But from a corporate perspectiveand from a business perspective
, I think there's a couplethings that give us courage.
The first thing is to realizethat, you know, a lot of times
our relationship with successand failure are messed up.
(27:19):
You know, we try and avoidfailure at every opportunity,
but the reality is, you cannotsucceed without having failed.
So if you're avoiding failure,you are preventing success.
And so, you know, so many of usare like I don't want to look
bad, I don't want to lose face,but yet in the next breath, all
(27:42):
of us would say I learned morefrom my mistakes than from my
wins.
And so I think we need to getcomfortable with the idea, first
of all, that nothing is sobinary as success or fail.
Nothing is that black and white.
Everything we do has someelements that worked and some
elements that didn't, and wecontrol the narrative Like 2024
(28:03):
was a great year for CareerBurner Circle, but was it
perfect?
No, did I make lots of mistakes?
Oh my goodness, yes.
And did every idea work?
Oh my God, no.
However, you know it's againthat narrative.
You focus on the things thatworked and you realize, okay,
we're gonna have to tweak thethings that we didn't.
And that comes down to what Icall an experimental mindset.
So if you've got this binarytake the hill, no matter what
(28:26):
and you know there's landmineseverywhere, but you're still
going to do this then you aresetting yourself up for a long
road of frustration.
But if you take smaller stepsand say I'm going to have this
experimental mindset where it'slike what does this button do?
And if I push that button, whathappens?
And then take that and keep thestuff that worked, get rid of
(28:47):
the things that didn't and tryagain.
And when you do these smalliterations and when you don't
turn this into some catastrophicyou know, pass, fail situation,
you're going to find thatyou've got the courage and the
resilience to do a lot more.
And the one thing I heard duringCOVID, my business had to take
a major pivot right.
I was doing all private workand in my business demand went
(29:10):
through the roof, but no onewould pay my rates anymore.
So I was like I got to figurethis out and so I did this.
I was stuck in the UK and itwas the whole thing.
And so I did this five-daychallenge with Tony Robbins and
Dean Graziosi, and Dean saidsomething that stuck with me.
He's like you have theresilience and if you knew that
you had to fail 36 times to getwhat you wanted, you do it
(29:31):
because you knew the 36th timeyou'd get it.
But the issue is we don't knowhow many times we have to fail
before we get where we want togo, and too many people stop at
the 34th or the 35th time, notrealizing that that last push is
what gets you where you want togo.
And so I think a little graceand a lot of humor and you know,
and that experimental mindsetand realizing that failure is
(29:53):
not the enemy and that failureis not absolute, gives us that
courage that we need to takethose bold actions for ourselves
.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
And take control.
Break the rules.
Break the rules and loveMondays again.
Speaker 3 (30:07):
Well, that's what it's all about, right?
And people thought I was crazy.
I'm like no, everyone deservesto love Mondays.
That's why we do what we dohere at CWC, because people
think it's a pipe dream, butwhen you step into it, your
whole life changes and it's justabsolutely amazing.
Speaker 1 (30:21):
So what would one tip or one piece of advice you
would give our listeners andviewers when it comes to
learning to love Mondays again?
Speaker 3 (30:33):
I think that the best tip I want to leave everybody
with is to think about what areyour most best skills, not what
are the things that are mostmarketable, but what are the
things that you can do for 12hours a day and end the day more
energized than when you started.
For me, it's coaching, it'sbeing on stages, it's doing
(30:55):
podcasts, it's working with ourother coaches.
I love that stuff.
I mean I can do marketing andsales and organic and social and
all that stuff.
But after about an hour or twoI'm sitting in my chair throwing
puzzles at the ceiling Right.
So first of all, step one is tofigure out what lights you up.
Step two is to do more of thatevery day figure out what lights
(31:15):
you up.
Speaker 1 (31:16):
Step two is to do more of that every day.
Love it, absolutely love it.
Speaker 3 (31:23):
They always say find what you love and you'll never
work a day in your life.
I agree, and not all of us havethe luxury of doing every day
Like I have to do stuff I don'tlike.
Right, it's called adulting.
But if you can find small waysto put the things that you love
most into your day, then you'regoing to find that those Mondays
are much easier to face andthat you start to really look
forward to it.
And over time you get into thissituation where you can
(31:44):
actually create the role aroundwhat you love to do and that's
the ultimate right Is to be ableto lean into that to help the
company reach their goals doingthe things that you do and love
most.
Speaker 1 (31:55):
I love that Everyone.
Please check out her bookEscaping the Career Traps.
You can find it on Amazon aswell as her website, which I
will remind you iscareerwinnercirclecom.
And then, of course, follow heron LinkedIn and go to her
website and make sure you learnall about her and what she's,
(32:16):
what she does and how she couldsupport you.
Tammy, this has been fabulous.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Thank you so much Such a pleasure.
Thanks for the invite.
I've loved our conversationtoday and then I heard the name
of the podcast.
I'm like I have got to be onthis one.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
I did too, and I will look forward to having everyone
reach out to you and learn moreabout you at
careerwinnercirclecom.
Speaker 3 (32:42):
Thanks, tammy, thank you very much, you bet.
Speaker 1 (32:46):
Now, that was a powerhouse conversation with
Tammy Alvarez of Career WinnerCircle.
We cover a whole gamut oftopics, but I want to mention a
few of them that you can makenote, maybe even set a goal
around and really start actingon so you can be building a
powerhouse career.
One of the first things is shetalked about advocates and
(33:09):
sponsors those individuals thatwill talk to others about you
when you're not in the room.
They'll advocate for newprojects, for promotions, for
new opportunities and therefore,if you don't have stakeholders
or advocates in your corner,then she talked about a
stakeholder's heat map, and it'sa great tool to use to really
(33:34):
prioritize those individualsthat could be helping the
trajectory of your career.
The next thing is she gave herscenario of being labeled or
branded the Velvet Hammer, andthe emphasis was on you needing
to define and to act on andbuild your own brand before
(33:57):
others create your brand for you.
There was a lot that I made noteof and that Tammy brought up so
(34:18):
you can navigate, control andreally drive your direction of
your career path, and so shareit with your team.
Make note if you have to go backand listen to it again, make
note for yourself and be surethat you are putting into place
what is needed in order for youto really have that powerhouse
career so you can love Mondaysagain, even if that means you
have to break some rules, asTammy says.
(34:38):
Now, if you are having anychallenges over and above what
we talked about today and youcould use some support in
handling them and navigatingthem, then please feel free to
even reach out to me and let'shave a conversation.
You can go tocoachmebernadettecom.
Forward slash discovery calland I'd be more than happy to
understand what the challengesthat you're having and provide
(34:59):
you tips and strategies to helpyou move forward so you can be
the powerhouse leader you'remeant to be.
Thank you for being with usthis week and I'll look forward
to having you right back herefor another episode of Shedding
the Corporate Bitch.
Bye.
Speaker 2 (35:18):
Thank you for tuning into today's episode of Shedding
the Corporate Bitch.
Every journey taken together isanother step towards unleashing
the powerhouse leader withinyou.
Don't miss any of our weeklyepisodes.
Subscribe to our podcast onApple Podcasts, spotify or
wherever you love to listen.
And, for those who thrive onvisual content, catch us on our
Shedding the Bitch YouTubechannel.
Want to dive deeper withBernadette on becoming a
(35:40):
powerhouse leader?
Visit balloffirecoachingcom tolearn more about how she helps
professionals, hr executives andteam leaders elevate overall
team performance.
You've been listening toShedding the Corporate Bitch
with Bernadette Boas.
Until next time, keep shedding,keep growing and keep leading.
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