April 8, 2025 • 26 mins
When was the last time you got up to get into the day and realized you are just not in the mood, or you just don't care to do anything?
We all have those days. Sometimes, there are days and even weeks of it. If you're not careful, it can really sabotage your success.
In this episode of the "Shedding the Corporate Bitch Podcast," host Bernadette Boas dives deep into the real-world struggles of managing low-energy days and facing times when you're just not in the mood to tackle your responsibilities. "When You're Just Not In The Mood" explores the critical impact of these days on your personal and professional life, highlighting essential strategies for recognizing burnout and transforming your energy so you can show up for your team, the business, and you!
While at the same time, giving yourself grace that you just may need to take a break.
Bernadette shares personal anecdotes, powerful tips for self-assessment, and practical hacks to shift from feeling empty to energized.
This episode is a must-listen for leaders looking to maintain peak performance while juggling their rigorous commitments and self-care. Learn how adjusting your routine, giving yourself permission to rest, and leveraging simple practices can help reignite your focus and empowerment in the corporate realm.
Tune in to discover how you can be the best leader for your team and yourself by embracing self-care and adaptability.
Don't forget to SUBSCRIBE, FOLLOW, and LIKE the show so you don't miss an episode.
Learn more at www.balloffirecoaching.com/podcast
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
When was the last time you experienced a day when
you just weren't in the mood, orworse, yet you just didn't care
?
At least for that moment,earlier, I was sitting here
staring at a blank screen,typing words, and yet feeling
extremely blah.
Not a creative idea or word wasshowing up, I had little to no
(00:25):
energy to do anything, and hereI was prepping for an episode of
Shedding the Corporate Bitch.
And that's when it came to me.
It came to me to lean into thesubject of what do you do when
you just aren't in the mood orwhen your tank is empty?
And yet, as a leader, you'reexpected to show up as your best
(00:49):
.
You're expected to show up on.
You're expected to show up toinspire and motivate and get
things done.
And because we all have thosedays when we wake up tired,
overwhelmed, stressed, feelinghelpless or just, you know,
running on empty, we know thatwe have to rally for our teams
(01:10):
to get the job done and at thesame time, we want to shift out
of that state of being becauseit feels really crap.
So I want to dive into exactlywhat is the impact when you're
just not in the mood, not onlyto your team or to the business,
but to yourself what you couldbe doing about it.
(01:32):
Simple hacks, simple strategies.
And then how do you navigateyourself from running on empty
to being fully charged andenergized, to go out and have a
powerhouse day.
So let's get started.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
Welcome to Shedding the Corporate Bitch, the podcast
that transforms today'smanagers into tomorrow's
powerhouse leaders.
Your host, bernadette Boas,executive coach and author,
brings you into a world wherethe corporate grind meets
personal growth and success ineach and every episode.
With more than 25 years incorporate trenches, bernadette's
own journey from beingdismissed as a tyrant boss to
(02:10):
becoming a sought-afterleadership coach and speaker
illustrates the very essence oftransformation that she now
inspires in others with her tips, strategies and stories.
So if you're ready to shed thebitches of fear and insecurity,
ditch the imposter syndrome andstep into the role of the
powerhouse leader you were bornto be, this podcast is for you.
Let's do this.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
To get started, let me give you some context before
my full disclosure that I justwas not in the mood when I got
up this morning, so I had ahorrific night's sleep.
Between the strange dreams andall the thoughts and ideas
running through my mindthroughout the night, I just
woke up feeling very strained,very empty, kind of like just no
(03:01):
energy.
My eyes were very heavy and Ijust wasn't in a mood to have to
go through the day too.
I knew I needed to push throughbecause, like you, as a leader,
as a manager, as any corporateprofessional, you have
obligations, you havecommitments, you have workloads
(03:24):
that you need to consider.
But there are times where youdefinitely need to make a
decision as to whether or notyou need to push through or you
need to simply wave the whiteflag and bail or give in to the
state of being that you're in.
But how do you decide which oneyou, you know you kind of act
(03:48):
on?
Because there are days,regardless of what our
commitments look like or whatour workload looks like, or what
our calendar looks like, wherewe do need to simply say you
know what?
I need to rest, I need tohydrate, I need to take a walk
and get my head on straight.
(04:10):
But again, there's that tug ofwar between the obligations that
we have and what our body, mindand spirit is telling us.
So the first thing that you canbe looking at to decide whether
or not you want to push throughor give yourself a break is to
(04:32):
one recognize the signs of justbeing burned out, of being on
running on empty, of just notbeing fully present, and that is
just the fact that you have alack of focus, you're irritable,
you are delaying orprocrastinating what it is that
(04:55):
needs to get started, let aloneget completed.
That's maybe sitting on yourdesk or maybe down the hall at
home, and recognizing that stateof being mentally, physically,
emotionally, spiritually willhelp you decide whether or not
you're going to be able to makethe shifts and the changes that
(05:16):
are needed.
So when you do go out into theworld, even if it's across a
computer, you can say that I'mgoing to be present, I'm going
to be attentive, I'm going to beintentional, I'm going to be
focused, I'm going to be able toadd value and contribute toward
the day Because, remember, yes,there's a job to do, but
(05:38):
there's also people that arerelying on you and there will be
impact to those people,depending upon your state of
being.
And then as well, as we talkedabout, it's a crappy existence
to live in a state of being evenif it's short term, let alone
long term that just feels emptyand stressed and overwhelmed.
(05:59):
So you want to recognize thesigns of where you're at, and
I'll give you some tips as tohow to do that.
At the same time, you want toassess yourself.
You want to kind of look atyour body, mind and spirit and
then, lastly, you want toconsider seriously the impact
that you're going to have if youwere to go out into the world
(06:22):
without making any changes.
Should you wake up or should yoube halfway through your day and
you're irritable or you'refrustrated, or you're on a short
fuse, or you're just not fullyattentive and fully present with
those around you.
And we all have these days, nomatter what level of the
(06:45):
organization we're in, how busyor how blank our work schedules
are, or how big or small ourprojects or responsibilities are
.
We all have these days.
So it's really really importantto one recognize that in
yourself, but also recognizethat in other people, that they
(07:08):
also could be a little off, andensure that you're there to
support them.
At the same time, if you needsupport, you need to be
acknowledging and beingtransparent to them about the
fact that you know what I'm justhaving a really crappy day, or
you know what I need a having areally crappy day, or you know
what I need a day off.
I need a day of rest.
That's really important becauseyou definitely want to be
(07:31):
swallowing your pride and notkilling yourself.
You don't want to ignore whatyour body, mind and spirit is
telling you, and there's timeswhen it is telling you that you
need to rest.
You need to have some quiettime.
You need to kind of separateyourself from all the chaos that
(07:52):
could be going on around youWhile they're.
At the same time, you want tolisten, for no, you got this.
You can push through this.
This is just a bad night'ssleep, and that was the decision
I made.
This morning was yes, I wastired, I was irritable, my head
hurt, my eyes were heavy, Ididn't have the energy level I
(08:15):
typically have, and yet therewas too many other important
things going on around me that Iwanted to be there for Need to,
as a leader, really get verylaser focused on listening to
your body, mind and spirit andmaking sure that you're taking
(08:36):
care of yourself, because, asthey say, even on a plane, put
the mask on yourself firstbefore helping others.
They're telling you you need totake care of yourself first to
be the best leader for thepeople around you.
If you were to decide you needto push through, what can you do
in order to go from a very low,if not empty, tank to a very
(09:01):
full, robust, energetic tank?
Well, first off, give yourselfpermission to feel off Again,
swallow the pride and simplygive yourself a break and give
yourself permission to feelwhatever it is that you're
(09:23):
feeling, if it is tired,irritability, you know, stress,
empty.
Feel it, recognize it.
Empty feeling, recognize it.
You can even sit there and goback and forth with do I like
(09:43):
this feeling or do I not likethis feeling?
Because the more you say youdon't like it, you're going to
want to be motivated andenergized to shift from it.
But at the beginning of this,just simply recognize and
acknowledge the state of mindthat you're in, okay, and then
simply, you know, do smallthings that can help you find
(10:05):
that energy, find thatmotivation, find that momentum
of moving forward.
So let me give you a few ideaswhere that's concerned.
So one of the things that I'lldo is first thing in the morning
though I failed to do it thismorning, I have to acknowledge
that is, I'll do a head to toe,toe to head assessment of myself
(10:29):
physically, emotionally,spiritually, mentally.
So I'll start up at the headand I'll just go down.
How am I feeling in my mind?
How am I feeling in my face, inmy jaw, because we tend to
clench or bite down when we'restressed or strained or
irritated.
Am I open and smiling or am Ifeeling like scowling, you know?
(10:52):
And then I work my way down.
Is my chest heavy or is it openand getting a lot of you know
oxygen?
How are my hips feeling, allthe way down to the toes?
And then I come back up and Ilook at it physically, mentally,
emotionally and spiritually.
How do I feel?
And then, if anything is off,I'll say okay, so what do I need
(11:15):
to do to shift it?
If my, for instance, thismorning with the bad mattress,
if my body is aching, what can Ido to shift those aches out and
bring more fuel and more energyinto my body?
And so I might get up and Imight stretch, I might just
(11:38):
meditate mentally, I might pray,I might do a little.
You know, exercises while I'mlying in bed or when I first get
up from bed.
This whole process canliterally take anywhere from one
to five minutes, no more thanthat.
Just to kind of acknowledgewhere I'm at and then to shift
(12:03):
it and so you could do that aswell for yourself is whether or
not you are laying in bed or youjust got out of bed.
You want to, you know, do ahead-to-toe, toe-to-head type of
assessment.
Now, why is this important?
Well, you don't want to berunning out into the world in a
state of being that's just goingto be projected onto other
(12:26):
people and it's going to comeback to you in the same way
you're putting it out.
So if you go out in a bad mood,I can guarantee you you're
going to have a bad mood comingback at you, whether it's from
one person or everybody that youinteract with in a given day.
And if you need proof of that,go out in the world with a scowl
(12:47):
on your face, even if you'renot feeling scally, but go out
with a scowl on your face andsee what is reflected back out
with a scowl on your face andsee what is reflected back.
The same with go out with asmile on your face, even when
you're feeling crappy, and seewhat comes back at you but, more
importantly, not only whatcomes back at you see how your
mood changes, your energychanges, your state of mind
(13:11):
changes because someone smilingback at you.
How are you going to doanything but smile?
How are you going to doanything but feel good when
someone actually is smiling backat you?
Versus, if someone's scowlingback at you and say you were in
a good mood, but you'repracticing the scowling and they
scowl back at you, I canguarantee you, all of a sudden,
your mood's going to go a littlenegative because of that
(13:36):
reaction that you received.
So you can just do a fullassessment and allow yourself to
shift very quickly within avery short period of time.
Now the other thing that you canbe doing is you can start small
on finding things to do.
(13:57):
That will then give youmomentum to do something even
bigger, and so that could startat home.
So say you get up, you'refrustrated, you're tired, you're
aggravated, but yet and you'vedone your head to toe, but
you're still kind of feeling alittle bit off.
You can go and do a small taskmake coffee, make breakfast,
(14:19):
feed the dog, take a walk, puton a exercise tape whatever the
case might be, I did age myselfright there and just start
something small.
If you do go from the bed andsit down at your desk, then just
pick one thing that you couldbe working on to kind of find
(14:40):
your way into it and then growfrom there.
Okay, so start small and do onetask at a time.
That will give you not only theenergy or the momentum moving
forward, but finishing that taskwill give you some confidence
and some motivation to want tocomplete another test, to be
(15:04):
able to check that one off aswell, and, if you need to, what
you can also be doing at thesame time is, if you are
somewhat unfocused, if you aredistracted, if you are feeling
like you're procrastinating onthings, then commit to yourself
that you're going to sit down,even if it's for five minutes,
(15:25):
10 minutes.
Take one of the tasks that youhave on your to-do list, set a
timer we all have timers on ourphone.
Set a timer and simply committo being focused and being
present, actively working onthat one task for five or 10
minutes and that you'll alsofind will give you some energy
(15:50):
but also confidence that you'reachieving something and that
you're only going to want toachieve more as a result.
You're going to want thatfeeling of accomplishment.
Even if you didn't finish it inthat five or 10 minutes, you're
going to at least feelaccomplished, that you were
focused, intentional andattentive to that task for that
(16:10):
five 10-minute time slot.
And then the next thing, youknow, you say, okay, I'm going
to do that for another 10minutes, or now I'm going to
work on something else.
10 minutes, 15 minutes, and youcan grow from there.
But if you ever are feelingdistracted or unfocused,
starting small, settingboundaries, the amount of time
(16:32):
that you're going to put yourfocus towards can give you a lot
of fuel in that tank.
The other one that I'll alsosuggest to my clients and I do
it myself quite honestly is whenI'm feeling not so right or
just off a little bit, I'll getdressed.
Even if I'm at home and I'mgoing to be doing calls all day,
(16:56):
even if I'm on a phone call,let alone a Zoom call, what I'll
do is I'll get dressed, I'llput on the makeup, I'll put on
you know, jewelry Didn't today,but we'll put on jewelry.
We'll put on, you know, a niceoutfit, just because, again,
feeling like you look good makesyou feel good, and so getting
(17:19):
dressed is also something verysimple.
If you're going into an officeand you woke up in a bad day,
then put on your best dress andgo out whether that's a suit or
a dress actually and go out andyou know, all of a sudden, that
is going to provide you someconfidence and some energy that
(17:39):
you might not have had before.
Versus, think about it you goout and you have a nice skirt
and top, or you have a nice pairof trousers and a polo shirt on
, and you know you're receivedvery differently than if you
were to go out and you have apair of sweatpants and a t-shirt
on.
These little tweaks candefinitely help to generate a
(18:04):
shift in your state of mind lowon energy or low on desire, low
on purpose or value.
They're just kind of hitting awall and they're frustrated.
Going back to the goals thatyou have, or going back to why
(18:26):
those goals are important foryou to pursue and achieve, will
also provide some momentum thatyou're lacking, by looking at
the fact that you know I havethis goal and these are the
reasons why I want to achievethese goals, because they're
going to change my life in youknow one, two and three ways.
(18:48):
That will also kind of helpsomeone to say you know what?
I have to get started on thisNow.
Again, through any of this, youmight then have this tug of war
of well, you know what.
It can wait until tomorrow, andI would advocate that you
(19:08):
listen to that.
You listen to your intuition,you listen to your body and mind
as to whether or not you shouldpush through or you should just
settle and go quiet and haverest.
Now, should you decide to pushthrough, that doesn't restrict
you or even limit you to stilllooking at the laundry list of
(19:33):
to-dos or the full blocked outcalendar of meetings and decide
that you want to be offloadingand delegating some of that work
or some of those meetings toother people.
Because one there's no bettermorale booster for other people
(19:53):
than to be given new assignmentsor different assignments, or
challenging assignments, orgiven an opportunity to sit in
on a meeting that they had neverhad before.
So it's good for them.
At the same time, you would beopening white space on your
calendar or on your to-do listthat then he allows you to
(20:14):
breathe and allows you torecognize that there's room for
you to then continue to workthrough whatever it is that
you're dealing with.
So really also use thisopportunity to not only
recognize the state of mind thatyou're in, assess it, make
(20:36):
changes so you shift from it,but also then get practical to
say you know, this might also betelling me that I need to be
looking at everything that Ihave on my plate and deciding
whether I should be delegatingit, delaying it, deleting it or
doing it myself.
(20:56):
So there's also thatopportunity that these down
times tend to bring up for us,because one your body, mind and
spirit is telling you something.
When you are stressed orstrained, overwhelmed, not
(21:20):
feeling on, not caring and notreally having a desire to do
anything, it's also screaming toyou hey, you need to look at
things that are going on in yourworld and reprioritize or
reestablish, or make sure youare delegating, make sure you
are delaying or deleting thingsthat are just not important,
even though everyone around youis telling you that they are.
(21:41):
So it gives you a greatopportunity to do that for
yourself, but also for your teammembers to have an opportunity
to do things that maybe youweren't given an opportunity to
do before, something verypractical, very simple but yet
very powerful.
That you could be doing too.
To kind of shift yourself, getin the mood, so to speak, is
(22:05):
change things up, work from adifferent space, that could be,
move where you are or where youtypically work in your own home
to a new location.
Get out and go to a coffee shopand work from there.
Go to the library, go into theoffice.
If you have that opportunity,if you're in the office and
(22:27):
you're just not fully presentand not fully on, then maybe get
yourself out of the office.
If you can't leave the building, maybe go find a conference
room or go out into the sharedspace that there might be
outside, or go down the streetto a coffee shop.
(22:49):
Get yourself out of theenvironment.
That might also be contributingto you just not finding the
energy and not finding the moodthat you want to be in in order
to push through At the same time.
Take yourself for a walk, goplay with your dog.
(23:09):
I'll take a lot of minifive-minute breaks throughout
the day and I'll just eitherstay in and, you know, play with
my dog, or I'll take her out tothe yard and throw the ball for
a few minutes and she typicallywill only do that for two or
three times and she comes inherself, but it gives me a break
(23:30):
times and she comes in herself,but it gives me a break, you
know, and it'll give you a breakjust to get out of the space.
That also could be contributingto the weight of the state of
mind that you're in.
Lastly, switch up your routine,depending upon what it is.
Just move things around.
If you work out in the morning,decide to work out at night,
give yourself a break in themorning and just sit at home,
(23:52):
and you know, on the couchenjoying a cup of coffee before
you get into the workspace andthen go to the gym at night.
If you typically don't go outto eat, go out to eat for lunch
as opposed to eating in orordering in or grabbing
something from the cupboard,whatever the case might be.
(24:12):
But switch up your routine.
Sometimes we get into such aroutine that it becomes mundane
and it becomes like you're agerbil on a wheel and the scene
never changes.
Change up the scene, change upthe routine.
Keep in mind, if thosepush-through strategies don't
work, then it could be becauseyour body, mind and spirit is
(24:37):
telling you to take a break,telling you to rest, telling you
to just get the break that youneed, and you should listen to
it and, especially if yourschedule allows for it, you
should take advantage of it.
And when I say when yourschedule allows for it, you
should take advantage of it.
And when I say when yourschedule allows for it, even if
(24:57):
it means you making harddecisions about moving things
around or canceling things ordelaying things or deleting
things, if your body is tellingyou that you need a break, you
need a rest, you need some quiettime, then be sure to listen to
(25:22):
it.
Okay, now recognize it's okayto have low energy days, it's
okay to simply not be in themood or even not to care
sometimes.
What is important is that youjust find the tools and the
practices and the techniquesthat will allow you to recognize
when you're not in a good stateof being, to assess what it is
that might be creating it orcausing it, delaying it, and
(25:43):
then using those tips, tools andstrategies to work your way
through it.
Just take care of yourself.
You deserve it to work your waythrough it.
Just take care of yourself.
You deserve it.
And to be a powerhouse leader,you really want to ensure that
you're modeling for others, butalso for yourself.
Self-care, all right.
I am grateful that you werehere this week and I'll look
(26:06):
forward to having you right backhere for another episode of
Shedding the Corporate Bitch.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
Bye.
Thank you for tuning intotoday's episode of shedding the
corporate bitch.
Every journey taken together isanother step towards unleashing
the powerhouse leader withinyou.
Don't miss any of our weeklyepisodes.
Subscribe to our podcast onApple podcasts, spotify or
wherever you love to listen.
And for those who thrive onvisual content, catch us on our
shedding the bitch YouTubechannel.
(26:30):
Want to dive deeper withBernadette on becoming a
powerhouse leader?
Visit balloffirecoachingcom tolearn more about how she helps
professionals, hr executives andteam leaders elevate overall
team performance.
You've been listening toShedding the Corporate Bitch
with Bernadette Boas.
Until next time, keep shedding,keep growing and keep leading.
When was the last time you experienced a day when
you just weren't in the mood, orworse, yet you just didn't care
?
At least for that moment,earlier, I was sitting here
staring at a blank screen,typing words, and yet feeling
extremely blah.
Not a creative idea or word wasshowing up, I had little to no
(00:25):
energy to do anything, and hereI was prepping for an episode of
Shedding the Corporate Bitch.
And that's when it came to me.
It came to me to lean into thesubject of what do you do when
you just aren't in the mood orwhen your tank is empty?
And yet, as a leader, you'reexpected to show up as your best
(00:49):
.
You're expected to show up on.
You're expected to show up toinspire and motivate and get
things done.
And because we all have thosedays when we wake up tired,
overwhelmed, stressed, feelinghelpless or just, you know,
running on empty, we know thatwe have to rally for our teams
(01:10):
to get the job done and at thesame time, we want to shift out
of that state of being becauseit feels really crap.
So I want to dive into exactlywhat is the impact when you're
just not in the mood, not onlyto your team or to the business,
but to yourself what you couldbe doing about it.
(01:32):
Simple hacks, simple strategies.
And then how do you navigateyourself from running on empty
to being fully charged andenergized, to go out and have a
powerhouse day.
So let's get started.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
Welcome to Shedding the Corporate Bitch, the podcast
that transforms today'smanagers into tomorrow's
powerhouse leaders.
Your host, bernadette Boas,executive coach and author,
brings you into a world wherethe corporate grind meets
personal growth and success ineach and every episode.
With more than 25 years incorporate trenches, bernadette's
own journey from beingdismissed as a tyrant boss to
(02:10):
becoming a sought-afterleadership coach and speaker
illustrates the very essence oftransformation that she now
inspires in others with her tips, strategies and stories.
So if you're ready to shed thebitches of fear and insecurity,
ditch the imposter syndrome andstep into the role of the
powerhouse leader you were bornto be, this podcast is for you.
Let's do this.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
To get started, let me give you some context before
my full disclosure that I justwas not in the mood when I got
up this morning, so I had ahorrific night's sleep.
Between the strange dreams andall the thoughts and ideas
running through my mindthroughout the night, I just
woke up feeling very strained,very empty, kind of like just no
(03:01):
energy.
My eyes were very heavy and Ijust wasn't in a mood to have to
go through the day too.
I knew I needed to push throughbecause, like you, as a leader,
as a manager, as any corporateprofessional, you have
obligations, you havecommitments, you have workloads
(03:24):
that you need to consider.
But there are times where youdefinitely need to make a
decision as to whether or notyou need to push through or you
need to simply wave the whiteflag and bail or give in to the
state of being that you're in.
But how do you decide which oneyou, you know you kind of act
(03:48):
on?
Because there are days,regardless of what our
commitments look like or whatour workload looks like, or what
our calendar looks like, wherewe do need to simply say you
know what?
I need to rest, I need tohydrate, I need to take a walk
and get my head on straight.
(04:10):
But again, there's that tug ofwar between the obligations that
we have and what our body, mindand spirit is telling us.
So the first thing that you canbe looking at to decide whether
or not you want to push throughor give yourself a break is to
(04:32):
one recognize the signs of justbeing burned out, of being on
running on empty, of just notbeing fully present, and that is
just the fact that you have alack of focus, you're irritable,
you are delaying orprocrastinating what it is that
(04:55):
needs to get started, let aloneget completed.
That's maybe sitting on yourdesk or maybe down the hall at
home, and recognizing that stateof being mentally, physically,
emotionally, spiritually willhelp you decide whether or not
you're going to be able to makethe shifts and the changes that
(05:16):
are needed.
So when you do go out into theworld, even if it's across a
computer, you can say that I'mgoing to be present, I'm going
to be attentive, I'm going to beintentional, I'm going to be
focused, I'm going to be able toadd value and contribute toward
the day Because, remember, yes,there's a job to do, but
(05:38):
there's also people that arerelying on you and there will be
impact to those people,depending upon your state of
being.
And then as well, as we talkedabout, it's a crappy existence
to live in a state of being evenif it's short term, let alone
long term that just feels emptyand stressed and overwhelmed.
(05:59):
So you want to recognize thesigns of where you're at, and
I'll give you some tips as tohow to do that.
At the same time, you want toassess yourself.
You want to kind of look atyour body, mind and spirit and
then, lastly, you want toconsider seriously the impact
that you're going to have if youwere to go out into the world
(06:22):
without making any changes.
Should you wake up or should yoube halfway through your day and
you're irritable or you'refrustrated, or you're on a short
fuse, or you're just not fullyattentive and fully present with
those around you.
And we all have these days, nomatter what level of the
(06:45):
organization we're in, how busyor how blank our work schedules
are, or how big or small ourprojects or responsibilities are
.
We all have these days.
So it's really really importantto one recognize that in
yourself, but also recognizethat in other people, that they
(07:08):
also could be a little off, andensure that you're there to
support them.
At the same time, if you needsupport, you need to be
acknowledging and beingtransparent to them about the
fact that you know what I'm justhaving a really crappy day, or
you know what I need a having areally crappy day, or you know
what I need a day off.
I need a day of rest.
That's really important becauseyou definitely want to be
(07:31):
swallowing your pride and notkilling yourself.
You don't want to ignore whatyour body, mind and spirit is
telling you, and there's timeswhen it is telling you that you
need to rest.
You need to have some quiettime.
You need to kind of separateyourself from all the chaos that
(07:52):
could be going on around youWhile they're.
At the same time, you want tolisten, for no, you got this.
You can push through this.
This is just a bad night'ssleep, and that was the decision
I made.
This morning was yes, I wastired, I was irritable, my head
hurt, my eyes were heavy, Ididn't have the energy level I
(08:15):
typically have, and yet therewas too many other important
things going on around me that Iwanted to be there for Need to,
as a leader, really get verylaser focused on listening to
your body, mind and spirit andmaking sure that you're taking
(08:36):
care of yourself, because, asthey say, even on a plane, put
the mask on yourself firstbefore helping others.
They're telling you you need totake care of yourself first to
be the best leader for thepeople around you.
If you were to decide you needto push through, what can you do
in order to go from a very low,if not empty, tank to a very
(09:01):
full, robust, energetic tank?
Well, first off, give yourselfpermission to feel off Again,
swallow the pride and simplygive yourself a break and give
yourself permission to feelwhatever it is that you're
(09:23):
feeling, if it is tired,irritability, you know, stress,
empty.
Feel it, recognize it.
Empty feeling, recognize it.
You can even sit there and goback and forth with do I like
(09:43):
this feeling or do I not likethis feeling?
Because the more you say youdon't like it, you're going to
want to be motivated andenergized to shift from it.
But at the beginning of this,just simply recognize and
acknowledge the state of mindthat you're in, okay, and then
simply, you know, do smallthings that can help you find
(10:05):
that energy, find thatmotivation, find that momentum
of moving forward.
So let me give you a few ideaswhere that's concerned.
So one of the things that I'lldo is first thing in the morning
though I failed to do it thismorning, I have to acknowledge
that is, I'll do a head to toe,toe to head assessment of myself
(10:29):
physically, emotionally,spiritually, mentally.
So I'll start up at the headand I'll just go down.
How am I feeling in my mind?
How am I feeling in my face, inmy jaw, because we tend to
clench or bite down when we'restressed or strained or
irritated.
Am I open and smiling or am Ifeeling like scowling, you know?
(10:52):
And then I work my way down.
Is my chest heavy or is it openand getting a lot of you know
oxygen?
How are my hips feeling, allthe way down to the toes?
And then I come back up and Ilook at it physically, mentally,
emotionally and spiritually.
How do I feel?
And then, if anything is off,I'll say okay, so what do I need
(11:15):
to do to shift it?
If my, for instance, thismorning with the bad mattress,
if my body is aching, what can Ido to shift those aches out and
bring more fuel and more energyinto my body?
And so I might get up and Imight stretch, I might just
(11:38):
meditate mentally, I might pray,I might do a little.
You know, exercises while I'mlying in bed or when I first get
up from bed.
This whole process canliterally take anywhere from one
to five minutes, no more thanthat.
Just to kind of acknowledgewhere I'm at and then to shift
(12:03):
it and so you could do that aswell for yourself is whether or
not you are laying in bed or youjust got out of bed.
You want to, you know, do ahead-to-toe, toe-to-head type of
assessment.
Now, why is this important?
Well, you don't want to berunning out into the world in a
state of being that's just goingto be projected onto other
(12:26):
people and it's going to comeback to you in the same way
you're putting it out.
So if you go out in a bad mood,I can guarantee you you're
going to have a bad mood comingback at you, whether it's from
one person or everybody that youinteract with in a given day.
And if you need proof of that,go out in the world with a scowl
(12:47):
on your face, even if you'renot feeling scally, but go out
with a scowl on your face andsee what is reflected back out
with a scowl on your face andsee what is reflected back.
The same with go out with asmile on your face, even when
you're feeling crappy, and seewhat comes back at you but, more
importantly, not only whatcomes back at you see how your
mood changes, your energychanges, your state of mind
(13:11):
changes because someone smilingback at you.
How are you going to doanything but smile?
How are you going to doanything but feel good when
someone actually is smiling backat you?
Versus, if someone's scowlingback at you and say you were in
a good mood, but you'repracticing the scowling and they
scowl back at you, I canguarantee you, all of a sudden,
your mood's going to go a littlenegative because of that
(13:36):
reaction that you received.
So you can just do a fullassessment and allow yourself to
shift very quickly within avery short period of time.
Now the other thing that you canbe doing is you can start small
on finding things to do.
(13:57):
That will then give youmomentum to do something even
bigger, and so that could startat home.
So say you get up, you'refrustrated, you're tired, you're
aggravated, but yet and you'vedone your head to toe, but
you're still kind of feeling alittle bit off.
You can go and do a small taskmake coffee, make breakfast,
(14:19):
feed the dog, take a walk, puton a exercise tape whatever the
case might be, I did age myselfright there and just start
something small.
If you do go from the bed andsit down at your desk, then just
pick one thing that you couldbe working on to kind of find
(14:40):
your way into it and then growfrom there.
Okay, so start small and do onetask at a time.
That will give you not only theenergy or the momentum moving
forward, but finishing that taskwill give you some confidence
and some motivation to want tocomplete another test, to be
(15:04):
able to check that one off aswell, and, if you need to, what
you can also be doing at thesame time is, if you are
somewhat unfocused, if you aredistracted, if you are feeling
like you're procrastinating onthings, then commit to yourself
that you're going to sit down,even if it's for five minutes,
(15:25):
10 minutes.
Take one of the tasks that youhave on your to-do list, set a
timer we all have timers on ourphone.
Set a timer and simply committo being focused and being
present, actively working onthat one task for five or 10
minutes and that you'll alsofind will give you some energy
(15:50):
but also confidence that you'reachieving something and that
you're only going to want toachieve more as a result.
You're going to want thatfeeling of accomplishment.
Even if you didn't finish it inthat five or 10 minutes, you're
going to at least feelaccomplished, that you were
focused, intentional andattentive to that task for that
(16:10):
five 10-minute time slot.
And then the next thing, youknow, you say, okay, I'm going
to do that for another 10minutes, or now I'm going to
work on something else.
10 minutes, 15 minutes, and youcan grow from there.
But if you ever are feelingdistracted or unfocused,
starting small, settingboundaries, the amount of time
(16:32):
that you're going to put yourfocus towards can give you a lot
of fuel in that tank.
The other one that I'll alsosuggest to my clients and I do
it myself quite honestly is whenI'm feeling not so right or
just off a little bit, I'll getdressed.
Even if I'm at home and I'mgoing to be doing calls all day,
(16:56):
even if I'm on a phone call,let alone a Zoom call, what I'll
do is I'll get dressed, I'llput on the makeup, I'll put on
you know, jewelry Didn't today,but we'll put on jewelry.
We'll put on, you know, a niceoutfit, just because, again,
feeling like you look good makesyou feel good, and so getting
(17:19):
dressed is also something verysimple.
If you're going into an officeand you woke up in a bad day,
then put on your best dress andgo out whether that's a suit or
a dress actually and go out andyou know, all of a sudden, that
is going to provide you someconfidence and some energy that
(17:39):
you might not have had before.
Versus, think about it you goout and you have a nice skirt
and top, or you have a nice pairof trousers and a polo shirt on
, and you know you're receivedvery differently than if you
were to go out and you have apair of sweatpants and a t-shirt
on.
These little tweaks candefinitely help to generate a
(18:04):
shift in your state of mind lowon energy or low on desire, low
on purpose or value.
They're just kind of hitting awall and they're frustrated.
Going back to the goals thatyou have, or going back to why
(18:26):
those goals are important foryou to pursue and achieve, will
also provide some momentum thatyou're lacking, by looking at
the fact that you know I havethis goal and these are the
reasons why I want to achievethese goals, because they're
going to change my life in youknow one, two and three ways.
(18:48):
That will also kind of helpsomeone to say you know what?
I have to get started on thisNow.
Again, through any of this, youmight then have this tug of war
of well, you know what.
It can wait until tomorrow, andI would advocate that you
(19:08):
listen to that.
You listen to your intuition,you listen to your body and mind
as to whether or not you shouldpush through or you should just
settle and go quiet and haverest.
Now, should you decide to pushthrough, that doesn't restrict
you or even limit you to stilllooking at the laundry list of
(19:33):
to-dos or the full blocked outcalendar of meetings and decide
that you want to be offloadingand delegating some of that work
or some of those meetings toother people.
Because one there's no bettermorale booster for other people
(19:53):
than to be given new assignmentsor different assignments, or
challenging assignments, orgiven an opportunity to sit in
on a meeting that they had neverhad before.
So it's good for them.
At the same time, you would beopening white space on your
calendar or on your to-do listthat then he allows you to
(20:14):
breathe and allows you torecognize that there's room for
you to then continue to workthrough whatever it is that
you're dealing with.
So really also use thisopportunity to not only
recognize the state of mind thatyou're in, assess it, make
(20:36):
changes so you shift from it,but also then get practical to
say you know, this might also betelling me that I need to be
looking at everything that Ihave on my plate and deciding
whether I should be delegatingit, delaying it, deleting it or
doing it myself.
(20:56):
So there's also thatopportunity that these down
times tend to bring up for us,because one your body, mind and
spirit is telling you something.
When you are stressed orstrained, overwhelmed, not
(21:20):
feeling on, not caring and notreally having a desire to do
anything, it's also screaming toyou hey, you need to look at
things that are going on in yourworld and reprioritize or
reestablish, or make sure youare delegating, make sure you
are delaying or deleting thingsthat are just not important,
even though everyone around youis telling you that they are.
(21:41):
So it gives you a greatopportunity to do that for
yourself, but also for your teammembers to have an opportunity
to do things that maybe youweren't given an opportunity to
do before, something verypractical, very simple but yet
very powerful.
That you could be doing too.
To kind of shift yourself, getin the mood, so to speak, is
(22:05):
change things up, work from adifferent space, that could be,
move where you are or where youtypically work in your own home
to a new location.
Get out and go to a coffee shopand work from there.
Go to the library, go into theoffice.
If you have that opportunity,if you're in the office and
(22:27):
you're just not fully presentand not fully on, then maybe get
yourself out of the office.
If you can't leave the building, maybe go find a conference
room or go out into the sharedspace that there might be
outside, or go down the streetto a coffee shop.
(22:49):
Get yourself out of theenvironment.
That might also be contributingto you just not finding the
energy and not finding the moodthat you want to be in in order
to push through At the same time.
Take yourself for a walk, goplay with your dog.
(23:09):
I'll take a lot of minifive-minute breaks throughout
the day and I'll just eitherstay in and, you know, play with
my dog, or I'll take her out tothe yard and throw the ball for
a few minutes and she typicallywill only do that for two or
three times and she comes inherself, but it gives me a break
(23:30):
times and she comes in herself,but it gives me a break, you
know, and it'll give you a breakjust to get out of the space.
That also could be contributingto the weight of the state of
mind that you're in.
Lastly, switch up your routine,depending upon what it is.
Just move things around.
If you work out in the morning,decide to work out at night,
give yourself a break in themorning and just sit at home,
(23:52):
and you know, on the couchenjoying a cup of coffee before
you get into the workspace andthen go to the gym at night.
If you typically don't go outto eat, go out to eat for lunch
as opposed to eating in orordering in or grabbing
something from the cupboard,whatever the case might be.
(24:12):
But switch up your routine.
Sometimes we get into such aroutine that it becomes mundane
and it becomes like you're agerbil on a wheel and the scene
never changes.
Change up the scene, change upthe routine.
Keep in mind, if thosepush-through strategies don't
work, then it could be becauseyour body, mind and spirit is
(24:37):
telling you to take a break,telling you to rest, telling you
to just get the break that youneed, and you should listen to
it and, especially if yourschedule allows for it, you
should take advantage of it.
And when I say when yourschedule allows for it, you
should take advantage of it.
And when I say when yourschedule allows for it, even if
(24:57):
it means you making harddecisions about moving things
around or canceling things ordelaying things or deleting
things, if your body is tellingyou that you need a break, you
need a rest, you need some quiettime, then be sure to listen to
(25:22):
it.
Okay, now recognize it's okayto have low energy days, it's
okay to simply not be in themood or even not to care
sometimes.
What is important is that youjust find the tools and the
practices and the techniquesthat will allow you to recognize
when you're not in a good stateof being, to assess what it is
that might be creating it orcausing it, delaying it, and
(25:43):
then using those tips, tools andstrategies to work your way
through it.
Just take care of yourself.
You deserve it to work your waythrough it.
Just take care of yourself.
You deserve it.
And to be a powerhouse leader,you really want to ensure that
you're modeling for others, butalso for yourself.
Self-care, all right.
I am grateful that you werehere this week and I'll look
(26:06):
forward to having you right backhere for another episode of
Shedding the Corporate Bitch.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
Bye.
Thank you for tuning intotoday's episode of shedding the
corporate bitch.
Every journey taken together isanother step towards unleashing
the powerhouse leader withinyou.
Don't miss any of our weeklyepisodes.
Subscribe to our podcast onApple podcasts, spotify or
wherever you love to listen.
And for those who thrive onvisual content, catch us on our
shedding the bitch YouTubechannel.
(26:30):
Want to dive deeper withBernadette on becoming a
powerhouse leader?
Visit balloffirecoachingcom tolearn more about how she helps
professionals, hr executives andteam leaders elevate overall
team performance.
You've been listening toShedding the Corporate Bitch
with Bernadette Boas.
Until next time, keep shedding,keep growing and keep leading.
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