The 100 Word Stories Podcast
At paranoia's poison door.
Episodes
May 5, 2025 • 1 min
George was a pirate, but he wasn't a very good pirate.
Still, even with his lack of skill, he had plenty of experience on the high seas.
So he was always tapped to give a presentation at the annual global pirate conference.
George made a point to take the batteries out of his wireless microphone so nobody in the audience could hear.
He didn't want to risk waking any of them up.
They'd all partied pretty hard the night before and we...
Mark as Played
May 4, 2025 • 9 mins
Lisa
Richard
Serendipidy
Tom
Norval Joe
Planet Z
The next topic is Mad World
NORVAL JOE
Billbert felt like Luke Skywalker saving Leia from Jabba the Hutt. He wiped his hands on his pants legs, held them out, and said, “Let’ go.”
“I can’t.” Mandi turned away and Billbert followed, floating into the room.
“Why not?” he asked, touching down on the bedroom carpet.
She turned back to him, her eyes filled...
Mark as Played
May 3, 2025 • 1 min
George was a pirate, but he wasn't a very good pirate.
He liked to bop people with anchors. He thought it was amusing.
The people whom George bopped with the anchors didn't.
When they came to, that is. Quite a few didn't, because getting bopped with an anchor tends to stave in skulls.
That's somewhat deadly.
Then, their next-of-kin didn't think it all that amusing, with the hassle of planning funerals and all that.
Unless, of cours...
Mark as Played
May 2, 2025 • 2 mins
George was a pirate, but he wasn't a very good pirate.
He was heading out of the harbor when a family in an old junk struck his ship.
George's ship was fine, for the most part, but the old junk was badly damaged.
George felt bad that the man's junk was damaged, but it was the junk that struck his ship, not the other way around.
Still, out of sympathy, he offered them a ride back to port.
The next day, the family's lawyer came aboar...
Mark as Played
May 1, 2025 • 1 min
George was a pirate, but he wasn't a very good pirate.
He was constantly roped into an endless series of sidetracks and distractions.
Such as the time when he found himself joining a fleet of three Spanish ships heading Westward to India.
"Okay, Nina, Pinta, Santa Maria," he said. "Now, which one's the Pinta? I keep confusing it with the Santa Maria."
The fleet never made it to India. They ended up wandering around the Caribbean, t...
Mark as Played
April 30, 2025 • 2 mins
George was a pirate, but he wasn't a very good pirate.
Every morning, the captain held an all-hands-on-deck staff meeting.
He'd go over important things and ask for input.
But every time a pirate suggested anything, the captain shot that pirate down.
Literally. The captain drew his flintlock pistol and shot the pirate, and they fell down dead.
One pirate raised his hand. "Might I suggest that you stop shooting us when we talk?" he ...
Mark as Played
April 29, 2025 • 1 min
George was a pirate, but he wasn't a very good pirate.
He made a point of stealing only from the wealthy, and then he'd give away all that he'd stolen to the poor.
George got a patronizing letter from Zorro that fully supported his generous nature.
"Let me know if you ever raid the seacoasts of Mexico," wrote Zorro. "We'll have a drink."
George made a point to frequently steal supplies from warehouses owned by Diego de la Vega, Zor...
Mark as Played
April 28, 2025 • 1 min
George was a pirate, but he wasn't a very good pirate.
So when the captain promoted him to Assistant Manager, the rest of the crew were all furious.
"George may not have basic pirate skills," said the captain. "But he's got people skills."
The captain went back to his cabin, put his feet up on his desk, and waited for the crew to hang George.
Instead, they beat down his door, dragged him to the deck, and threw a rope around his nec...
Mark as Played
April 27, 2025 • 11 mins
Lisa
Richard
Lizzie
Serendipidy
Tom
Norval Joe
Planet Z
The next topic is Star Wars
LISA
Opening Night
After centuries keeping marauders out the drawbridge was lifted and Castle Rock Hotel was finally open for business. The battle to turn the Castle into a hotel had been a long one and after extensive remodelling the Charm and character of a period property had been retained. It was so sympatheticall...
Mark as Played
April 26, 2025 • 1 min
George was a pirate, but he wasn't a very good pirate.
He bought a toaster, put it next to his bunk, and pushed down the button.
It popped back up, but there was no toast.
He pushed the button again and again, but it kept popping up without producing any toast.
The captain patted George on the shoulder.
"It would help if you put bread in it to toast."
George smacked himself on the forehead. "Right!"
He put in two slices of bread an...
Mark as Played
September 19, 2020 • 1 min
George wasn’t a pirate. He was a barkeep. He bought this bar and named it George the Pirate. And pirates from all around would come here to drink. Sometimes, they’d pay with a ship’s wheel, or a figurehead, or an anchor. All the junk you see hanging on the walls. They’d tell stories, but it … Continue reading "George the Barkeep"
Mark as Played
September 18, 2020 • 1 min
George was a pirate, but he wasn’t a very good pirate. Still, he did his best to find ways of being useful. Every year, he ran The Great Pirate Chili Cookoff. Pirates from all around the world sailed in to challenge each other’s cooking prowess. Sometimes, all-out wars would break out, especially between factions of … Continue reading "George the Chili Cookoff"
Mark as Played
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