November 21, 2022 • 48 mins
Over the past decade, The Bubble Hour has featured more than 50 authors! We looks at some memorable interiews, and offers insights about what it's like to prepare for an author interview. Affiliate links: The Authenticity Project by Clare Pooley Drink by Ann Dowsett Johnston The Sober Lush by Amanda Eyre Ward and Jardine Libaire The Sober Curious Reset by Ruby Warrington Quitter by Erica C Barnett The Wine O’Clock Myth by Lotta Dann Highlight Real by Emily Lynn Paulson One Good Reason by Sean McCann and Andrea Argon The Do-Over by Karlyn Pipes Through a Sober Lens by Michael Blanchard Hope Dealer by Lucy Hall CLICK HERE FOR BOOK LINKS Take Good Care: Recovery Readings Inspired by The Bubble Hour podcast www.thebubblehour.com https://sites.libsyn.com/448419 www.jeanmccarthy.ca https://patreon.com/thebubblehour
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This podcast includes frank discussions of mature themes that may
not be suitable for all audiences. Listener discretion is advised.
This podcast is intended to provide encouragement and support through
personal storytelling. The views expressed are the opinions of the
participants and not intended to be medical, legal, clinical, or
(00:21):
professional information or advice of any kind. Welcome to the
Bubble Hour, Welcome to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
Welcome to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Welcome to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 4 (00:35):
Welcome, Welcome, Welcome, Welcome for the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 5 (00:38):
Ownent, a diffent, not praps we and what a face?
Speaker 6 (00:44):
Take a little dignity. Not looking for excuses. I just
want to be free from the power. Believe us head
to be free, free, free, free free.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
I'm Jean McCarthy and you're listening to the Bubble Hour.
Welcome back. This is part seven out of ten in
our tenth and final season. As we look back over
a decade of the Bubble Hour, many notable recovery authors
come to mind as memorable interviews. As the years went by,
the show steadily rose through online rankings as a top
(01:27):
recovery podcast. The Promotions Department from Publishing houses began sending
books to consider, and I soon found myself absolutely swamped
with manuscripts and guest proposals. More than fifty authors have
been featured on the Bubble Hour, including best selling names
like Claire Pooley, Anne DAWSA Johnston, and Amanda air Ward.
(01:49):
We've also featured influential recovery writers like Ruby Warrington, Amy Dresner,
and Erica C. Barnett. Today, I'm thrilled to talk with
a fellow author and blog, the charming, warm, funny Claire Poolly.
Claire's blog, Mummy was a Secret Drinker, began in twenty
fifteen and formed the basis for her first book, a
(02:11):
memoir called The Sober Diaries. It was such a huge success,
and her second book, a novel called The Authenticity Project,
is now available. It's sure to be a huge hit
as well. Here's Claire Pooly.
Speaker 7 (02:24):
I think when I was drinking, I was very selfish,
and I think addicts tend to be because you know,
we spend so much of our mental energy thinking about
where the next drink is coming from. You know, most
of my headspace was filled with am I going to
(02:44):
drink this evening? How much am I going to drink
this evening? What am I going to drink this evening?
Where am I going to buy it? All those sorts
of things constantly interrupting my life. I didn't have the
mental space or the energy, you know, anytime I wasn't
dealing with my addiction, I was dealing with my kids,
my own life. I don't think I was a very
good friend, or a very good wife, or a very
(03:06):
good person for a while, and I didn't see it
when I was in it. But I don't think i'd
helped anybody who wasn't, you know, I wasn't directly related to.
But sometimes it gave me back my self respect In
many ways, you only have the energy to help other
people if you are yourself in a relatively good place,
(03:29):
and I wasn't when I was when I was drinking.
When you're really truthful about your life, nothing can hurt you.
Because nobody was going to turn around and call me
a lush because I'd already done that myself. You know,
I'd already called myself a bad mother.
Speaker 8 (03:44):
I'd already told.
Speaker 7 (03:46):
Everyone that, you know, that my life was out of control,
and that for a long time I wasn't a particularly
good person, So anybody else saying that back to me
was not going to have an effect. That was a
really liberating realization.
Speaker 8 (04:00):
And when you're really.
Speaker 7 (04:01):
Truthful about your life, other people are really kind. When
you make yourself vulnerable, people are really really kind. Since then,
I've had literally thousands of messages from people all over
the world saying what a difference that book made to them,
because they, like me, were feeling really alone. They were
feeling like I was, that my life was over, and
(04:24):
it made them realize that they weren't alone and their
life was only just beginning. The whole idea behind the
Authenticity Project is the idea that everybody lies about their lives,
and we all put on this front that the truth
often is very different. That was really inspired by what
I had done myself. You know, I'd spent years and
years and years hiding the truth. So the book is
(04:46):
about an artist who finds a little notebook and he
writes in it, everybody lies about their lives. What would
happen if you told the truth instead? And he tells
the truth about his life, leaves it in a cafe
where it's picked up by the owner, who reads his
story and reads about how lonely he is, and decides
to track him down and help change his life. And
she writes her own truth and then leaves the book
(05:08):
somewhere else, and the book has passed between six strangers
who all tell the truth about their lives and all
end up meeting each other and changing each other's lives
in miraculous ways. And that really is the recovery community,
isn't it?
Speaker 8 (05:22):
In the You know, it's about.
Speaker 7 (05:24):
People who are ostensibly very different, but who all find
each other and make each other's lives better by being authentic.
It is fiction, but it's very much inspired by my
own life.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
And Elsa Johnston, Welcome to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 9 (05:50):
I think it's just a real joy to imagine that
there's people out there in the listenership to this show
who are curious, who you just know through self selection,
are more curious than most around the subjects that we're
talking about. And because I believe that this is something
(06:13):
that we help one another with and hand on to
one another, and community matters so much that it's a
joy to talk about the profound psychic and spiritual shifts
that can happen and not feel too self conscious or
(06:35):
goofy about the whole thing. It really is transformational recovery.
And sometimes, you know, on a good day, I had,
as you know from reading the book, some major lifes
in recovery. But on a good day I can say
all of this happened for a reason, and there are well,
(06:58):
obviously the book couldn't have happened without my recovery. But
to write that book was a privilege. To be able
to share my experience of recovery and to take the
time in my life and say I will carve ote
this spade, this moment up north with my dogs and
(07:21):
write this book. It was really the joy of my life.
And so this interview is like this was like the book.
You know, you focus on the listenership that you really
believe you're aiming for, which is those who are wrestling
with the issue.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
Excellent books about recovery just keep coming, and you will
want to make room on your bookshelves for something a
little different than the usual how tos and memoirs. The
Sober Lush by Amanda air Ward and Jardine Labert is
a gorgeous keepsake of a book, beautifully design and it's
been written by two accomplished and celebrated writers who happen
(08:09):
to be friends as well as women in recovery. Together,
these two explore all of the ways that their lives
have become richer and fuller in the absence of alcohol,
and how recovery has challenged them to seek out beauty, comfort, joy,
and indulgence with the new superpower of being completely present
and grateful. Amanda is the author of eight novels, most
(08:31):
recently The jet Setters, and Jardine has written six novels,
plus has written for TV and film, including the recently
released movie Endings Beginnings. Both are accomplished and talented, and
yet the sober lush they embark on something new in
exploring their personal stories of recovery and friendship. Amanda and Jardine,
(08:51):
Welcome to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 10 (08:54):
Thank you so much for having me on to be here.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
How does it feel to tell your own story? Are
you both feeling a little vulnerable right now? Are you
taking it in stride? Amanda? How does it feel for you?
Speaker 10 (09:09):
It is not a comfortable place for me at all.
Speaker 11 (09:13):
To some extent, I'm thrilled for it to be out
in the world, because I would have liked to find
a book like this, and I'm really excited at the
thought that maybe someone who needs to quit will decide
to quit or be inspired to drink less from this book.
That would mean everything to me. It will be a
use for all the misery that I went through. But
(09:36):
I'm really uncomfortable talking about it. We talked about this
a little bit. It's you know, AA is anonymous, and
so it's strange to come out and talk about it.
Jardine had been sober longer than me, and when I
got sober, I went through every day and did everything
exactly the.
Speaker 10 (09:53):
Same without wine, and it was terrible. You know.
Speaker 11 (09:57):
I went to the same parties and just stood there
with a a glass of that Fray fake wine or
a Seltzer.
Speaker 10 (10:04):
You know, I didn't have any tools.
Speaker 11 (10:05):
I just was like, well, I'm going to do this
and life's going to be gray, and that's just the
way it is because I.
Speaker 10 (10:10):
Have to quit.
Speaker 11 (10:11):
And then a friend, a mutual friend, said, you know, Amanda,
you should meet my friend Jardine. And I remember it
was so magical for me going to Jardine's house for
the first time, and it was very early in my sobriety,
and I arrived for coffee and her house was just
so welcoming and elegant, and she had books I wanted
(10:33):
to read on her shelves, and we sat and talked,
and you know that incredible connection you have when you
talk with other people in recovery, the right people, when
you just feel like you can say anything. And I cried,
and I snuggled with lovermana.
Speaker 10 (10:51):
I just I looked around and I thought, oh, this
is what I want.
Speaker 11 (10:56):
You know, I don't have to just have a grim,
gray life where I've removed my anthesia. I can build
a whole new, beautiful life filled with incredible things. And
my friendship with Jardine was the first incredible thing. And
I'm and then so together we talked about that and
(11:19):
you'd already gone, you'd already figured a lot of this out, Jardine, some.
Speaker 12 (11:23):
Of it, but our friendship and the conversations we had,
and then the conversation as it turned into this book
just helped me grow so much more. And you know,
I think a man and I did a ton of work,
like because the book required it, zeroing in on the
many different things we thought we would have to give
(11:43):
up and lose. And it's been like a fourth wave
of revelation for me, you know, deeper into sobriety to
see oh yes, you know, communal gathering and eating. That's
been so important to me since I was a kid
because of how I grew up. That is part of
why I clung to drinking, because I didn't want to
(12:04):
give up that that feeling. And so Amanda and I've
been kind of forensically figuring out together, you know, how
to break down this bigger idea of celebrating that sobriety
can be beautiful into the many different little ways of
celebrating the hour that you're in or the thing that
you used to do. The sober lush is an ode
(12:27):
and a roadmap to the technicolor and playful side of sobriety.
So it's not about how to get sober or stay sober.
I think both a man and I are on the
side of you know, that is for an individual to decide.
I could not have gotten sober or using a book.
Some people maybe can. But it's also not a book
about just recovery or just substances. It ends up being
(12:51):
about motorcycle riding and skinny dipping and honey and ice
skating and all these other piece of life, and that
to us mirrors how getting sober was not even about
sobriety in the ways that we thought it was, but
but about living in life. That's the best I can do.
Speaker 8 (13:15):
That's bravo, bravo.
Speaker 6 (13:19):
I'd buy that book.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
I'm holding space for none other than Ruby Warrington, the
author of Sober Curious, and she has a new book out,
a workbook that is fantastic. It's called The Sober Curious Reset.
Speaker 9 (13:41):
I thought of.
Speaker 13 (13:42):
Quitting complete abstinence for life was like being taken up
to the edge of the cliff and someone's saying, just
jump off, just jump off.
Speaker 8 (13:50):
And down the bottom is like Nirvana. It's it's Nirvana down.
They just got a jump.
Speaker 13 (13:55):
Okay, Sure, this way is kind of you know, getting
tooled up, getting a map, getting a backpack, getting supplies,
finding the kind of like rocky path down the mountain,
and then at the bottom, guess what it is the fire.
But it's so much easier to contemplate, Like our human
brain has no reference point forever, so it's almost impossible
(14:20):
to contemplate quitting forever. We don't know how long forever is.
We have no way of knowing quitting for thirty days
is much easier manageable chunk of time, And if you
tool up to do that thirty days, then I think
you're a lot less likely to even want to go
back to drinking how you work, because you will have
discovered so much about the benefits of not drinking and
(14:43):
most importantly, the why am I drinking? What is this
doing for me?
Speaker 7 (14:49):
Okay?
Speaker 13 (14:50):
When I have that information, I can proactively start looking
for other things behaviors, thoughts, practices, activities that do that
thing for me. They don't look the same and they
wouldn't do it in exactly the same way, but I
can start to replace alcohol with something else that does
actually serve me.
Speaker 1 (15:19):
What a story is My Fair Junkie, Amy Dressner's darkly
comic memoir of two long decades in and out of
addiction in multiple forms.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
I wanted to write the book to help people. That
was really the drive behind it. I wanted to help
other addicts feel less alone and feel less ashamed and
less broken, and to give them hope because, as you know,
someone who had relapsed a lot and been in a
lot of rehabs, there was many times where I was like,
I'm just never going to get there. I'm going to
die drug addict. But this is not this is this
is not looking good. I wanted people to know it's
(15:50):
never too late and if you're alive, you've got a chance,
and just don't give up. I also wanted family and
friends of non addicts to kind of get an inside
you of what addiction is like for the addict, Like
what it's like to be in our brain, the convoluted thinking,
the rumination, the comulsion, compulsivity, call the negativity, the self loathing,
(16:11):
like what that's like, which is so amazing to turn
like twenty years of pain and self destruction into a
tool that's helping people. It's like, Wow, I don't regret
a moment of what I went through because it's helped
other people. I know that there's parts that are super
super heavy in the book. I wanted points where there
was some levity, and I also for myself, I needed
(16:35):
to laugh at myself and the circumstances and see the
humor to survive some of that stuff. And there was
definitely parts where I was like, I don't want to
put this on the page, and I just know as
a writer, like that's exactly what you have to fill
on the page, because that is going to be the
thing that someone's going to go, oh my God, thank you,
like you can't hold back if you're trying to look
good in an addiction memoir, like you're not being honest enough.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
Here's Erica C. Barnett, author of Quitter, a memoir of drinking, relapse,
and recovery.
Speaker 14 (17:13):
My book begins with one of many many rock bottoms
that I experienced in my very low bottom alcoholism. I
didn't really start drinking in earnest and heavily until I
was well into my thirties, which I think seems a
little atypical, but is actually pretty common for women.
Speaker 8 (17:31):
I discovered while researching the book.
Speaker 14 (17:34):
I worked with Sarah Happola, who wrote the great book Blackout.
At the Chronicle, it was definitely a drinking culture. Moved
to Seattle, got another job at a publication called The Stranger,
which is the time, was kind of the coolest all
weekly in the country.
Speaker 8 (17:47):
That is when my drinking really got underway.
Speaker 14 (17:51):
The culture of alternative weekly journalism at the time, in
the culture of journalism and politics in general, at least
in Seattle, really revolved around drinking.
Speaker 8 (18:02):
You didn't go out for coffee.
Speaker 14 (18:04):
I mean that concept was like totally unfamiliar to me
until I actually quit drinking and started inviting people out
for coffee. And it felt very awkward. You went out
for drinks. I mean, I drank because I felt uncomfortable
in my own skin. I felt like I wasn't cool enough,
I wasn't smart or clever enough. I just couldn't sort
of meet the standards that I felt the world wanted
(18:27):
me to meet. And the thing that made me feel
more comfortable was having a few drinks. Unfortunately, you know,
I have this genetic predisposition that made it the case
that I became addicted pretty quickly and pretty hard. I
was in this cycle from which I could not escape.
I went to my first detox in my early thirties
(18:50):
in two thousand and eight, and I really thought at
the time that that was all that was going to
be necessary. But I thought that if I went to
this detox and was there for five days and I
cleared all the alcohol out of my system, then I
would have the willpower to accomplish you know, sobriety or
I don't even think I thought of it as sobriety.
(19:11):
I thought of it as a return to normal life.
If I just quit, then it'll be fine. And of
course that's not how addiction works. It is cunning, baffling
and powerful. And I think baffling was the was the
operative word there for me, because when I relapsed the
first time, there was absolutely no reason, there was no trigger.
(19:32):
It wasn't a bad day, it wasn't a good day.
I wasn't celebrating, I wasn't morning. I just thought, hey,
maybe I can drink now. The next five years or
so kind of went like that. The way it usually
happened was I would quit for a little while, I'd
start feeling really good. Because what happens when you quit
physically your body just you know, I mean you know this, Geene,
(19:54):
It just it can be like an amazing transformation, especially
if you have suffered a lot from the physical effects.
Speaker 8 (20:03):
Of drinking, as I did. I mean, I just I
felt great.
Speaker 14 (20:06):
I was like, wow, I'm not hungover, like I just
felt like crap all the time. When I woke up,
I had an immediate need for alcohol. I drank all
day at the end. It was just constant physical and
mental misery. So when I quit, I would feel great
and then eventually I would just decide I didn't need
to be quit anymore, and calling a decision is actually
(20:28):
overstating it. The vodka would land in my cart at
the grocery store, and I wouldn't know how it got there,
and then we'd be off to the races again. This
went on and on and just this endless cycle, and
every time it would get a little bit worse and
a little bit worse, and sometimes it would get a
little bit better. When I talk about rock bottoms and
the rock bottom I hit. There are so many examples
(20:50):
like that that when I was writing the book, my
editor actually cut quite a bit out because it was
getting repetitive, which I think really describes the life of
a late stage alcoholic.
Speaker 8 (21:00):
It's incredibly repetitive.
Speaker 14 (21:02):
So the instance I described in the book is I
got fired from my job and I was going to
pick up my stuff. I got very, very drunk, came
back home from picking up some of my stuff at
the office because I was asked to leave because I
was so drunk, and getting off the train, falling down
on my face, pants falling down to my butt, lying
(21:23):
on the ground in the seattle, pouring rain, and just
wondering if I would make it home, or if you know,
I would die in the bushes, and the headlines would
be about failed writer but died of alcoholism on the sidewalk.
Speaker 8 (21:36):
Outside her house.
Speaker 14 (21:38):
It's sad to describe that event as typical, But the
stuff that I cut from the book were things like
day after day of these individually terrible rock bottom.
Speaker 8 (21:47):
E instances that just didn't make me quit.
Speaker 14 (21:50):
One of the messages that I am trying to convey
in the book is that we like to think of
this idea that there is an identifiable rock bottom That
is true for some people. It's really important to stay
on top of why you got sober in the first place,
and not just the bad things that were happening beforehand,
but the good things that have happened since you got sober.
(22:13):
Being sober is not always a picnic. I mean, you
still have to live your life and stuff still goes wrong.
I think the reason ultimately that I relaped is that
I forgot why I got sober in the first place.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
Do you ever wish for a little bit of recovery
inspiration on the go? Tiny Bubbles is a new podcast
that brings you the best bits of the bubble Hour
podcast in quick little episodes, just fifteen minutes long, but
packed with wisdom, insight, and encouragement to live your life
wholeheartedly and alcohol free. Look for Tiny Bubbles wherever you
(22:53):
get podcasts and subscribe today. Tiny Bubbles little bits of
recovery goodness brought to you by the Bubble Hour. Sometimes
all you need is a little pep talk so you
can get back to living that beautiful life you're building.
(23:16):
Take Good Care as a new collection of recovery readings
inspired by the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 6 (23:21):
If you love the.
Speaker 1 (23:22):
Encouragement and support you find here on this podcast, then
this new book is for you. Visit the Bubblehour dot
com for more information or check the show notes for
a link to purchase. You'll find Take Good Care on
Amazon worldwide. Take Good Care recovery reading inspired by the
Bubble Hour, the perfect gift for yourself and friends. As
(23:48):
a recovery writer myself, I'd connected with other authors around
the world. Popular New Zealand writer Lauda Dan, author of
three books including Missus d Is Going Without, Missus d
Is Going Within, and The Wine O'clock Myth, appeared numerous
times on the show and shared her insights on life
after alcohol.
Speaker 4 (24:07):
My identity was actually fun drinking lotter, and I had
the two things just completely meshed, and I was absolutely
purified that the fun was going to stop, and worse
than that, that I was going to be a boring,
sober loser for the rest of my life and that
no one would want to hang out with me. You know,
(24:30):
I loved being a hostess. I love having fun at
a party, and I didn't think that that was going
to be possible without the alcohol. I was really really
terrified of that. But because I knew I had no
option but to stop drinking because it was getting really bad,
I just had to dive into that fear, because what
else are you going to do? So it was just
(24:52):
a matter of trial and error until I managed to
find the fun again. But absolutely, the fear is real,
and it's terrifying. I mean, you know what it's like
when you're standing on the edge of the cliffs staring
at a life with no alcohol in it and it
looks like a big, deep, dark ocean and you have
to jump into it. It's horrible. Yeah, how can I
(25:16):
be that person that I like? I like the fun lotter?
How can I be her? What if I'm not her
anymore when I take the alcohol away. What if I
don't like who I become. If we're not smiling and
having fun, if we're not on the dance floor, there's
a problem. My twisted drinker's brain was telling me that,
(25:38):
And that's the thing that actually bollocks, because we're not
all fun all of the time. It took a lot
of trial and error and just going out to events,
and you know, at first, I felt really alien in
my own skin and almost like I was wearing a
gorilla suit that no one else could see because I
(26:00):
I had my security blanket, you know, fun persona taken
away from me. And so I was pretty awkward and uncomfortable,
and I would do things like smoke heaps of cigarettes
or have far too many energy drinks to try and
create that vibe that I'd had when I was drinking.
But the longer I went, you know, without drinking, and
(26:21):
the more times I went out to parties and then
occasionally hit on a really good one when I actually
had a really fun time without drinking, the more I
realized the power wasn't in the glass, it was in me,
and if everything lined up for me, I felt good
I was in a good mood. It was a right crowd.
(26:43):
I liked the music or the food or whatever, and
I had a great night. I had a great night.
I mean, I totally had a great night. And I
would be the last on the dance floor and I
would almost feel I was having so much fun, and
then I'd realize, so this isn't about me. This is
about me and the party. But you know, sometimes that
(27:05):
doesn't happen. Either I'm in a bad mood or I
don't like my dress, or it's not my crowd and
I don't feel comfortable or whatever, and I do stand
there and I feel a bit. I wouldn't even say
it's flat, but I'm just not that fun person. But
now I don't mind that because I think that's real too.
(27:26):
So I'm not sort of so desperate for everything to
be the best party ever in the history of the
world every time I go out. So it has been
a settling down, you know, into myself when I'm out.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
Socially, when an author releases a new title, they go
out on a media blitz and talk to as many
outlets as possible to get the word out about their
new book. In the year since the bubble Hour began,
other recovery podcasts have emerged, and I noticed that many
of us would end up with the same guest within
a short period of time. I always work to make
sure that my interviews took a little different tack, and
(28:02):
before I talked to them on air, I asked authors
what they wanted to talk about that no one else
had asked them so far. It can be a little
monotonous for writers on a media tour to just keep
saying the same thing over and over again on different shows,
and I think they always appreciated the chance to freshen
up the approach. I also made a rule for myself
to always read the book, all of it before interviewing
(28:24):
an author, and it may surprise you to hear that
this is unusual and it always meant a lot to
the guests. I hope my preparedness made your experience as
a listener more enjoyable as well, and help the guests
to shine their best and brightest. The same Internet and
social media that creates healing connections through recovery blogs, podcasts,
recovery support groups is also the source of the problem
(28:47):
in so many ways, as today's guest shows through her
memoir Highlight Reel, author Emily Lynn Paulson peels back the
layer of deception she unwittingly employed to mask the chaos
and pain behind the beautiful images she showed to the world. Emily,
Welcome to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 8 (29:03):
What I thought.
Speaker 15 (29:03):
Would really be me writing about a mom getting sober
turned into this memoir of these patterns and these behaviors
that had really shown up through my entire life. And
just like you said, with social media being very positive
and connecting and also being very detrimental, I was the
(29:25):
person who looked like they had it all, and I
was really able to hide all of these behaviors and
these addictions behind those little squares on social media. My
job was going well, my family looked happy, and I
was falling deeper and deeper and deeper into my addictions.
And really throughout my whole life. I found that I
had done that through geographically relocating, trying to run away
(29:49):
from one problem, trying to reinvent myself constantly, but never
really getting to the root of why I was drinking.
Speaker 8 (29:56):
Or using in the first place.
Speaker 15 (30:00):
Part of my downfall, I think, was that I didn't
deal with things at all. Things happened, and I again,
like you said, I closed the lid and I sat
on it. I didn't deal with it. I didn't look
at it. I just assumed I was fine because it
wasn't affecting me the way I thought it should. Maybe
I was really letting other people tell me who I was,
(30:22):
and then I was just extrapolating on that by posting
all the pretty photos and all of the good things
and sharing all of the good things. And it was
a vicious cycle because I was making myself look better
than I was to other people and knowing inside that
I didn't match up to that. So I would say
that was really a theme through my whole life is
trying to figure out who I was. And I did
(30:43):
not even know who I was until I got sober,
and so I feel like the last three years really
has been finding out who I am and liking who
I am, and finding out.
Speaker 8 (30:53):
What I like, what I don't like.
Speaker 15 (30:55):
What feels good, what doesn't feel good, what tastes good,
what doesn't taste good, all of those things that you
should developed through your life. I've really started learning about
just in the last few years.
Speaker 1 (31:04):
Here's Canadian musician Sean mccannon his wife Andrea Argonne, talking
about the experience of writing a book together to really
flesh out both sides of the story about marriage and
recovery in their book One Good Reason.
Speaker 16 (31:18):
I spent about a year writing my story and that
was a hard thing to do. But at the end
of the year we read it, I just didn't feel
like it was the whole story. It didn't feel complete
to me. Everything was truthful, and it was. It was difficult,
but it wasn't all there. And then Andrea had been
keeping a journal in real time during a lot of
(31:38):
the events, certainly in our relationship. She showed me a
couple of those journal entries. They were very eye opening
and sobering for me. That was the other side of
the story. So we decided to write the book together
so we'd have a comprehensive look at what the truth
really was from every angle. I don't think you can
tell a story of a marriage from one side that marriage.
Speaker 17 (32:01):
He showed me a particular chapter that he was writing
and his memory of it, and then I was like, WHOA,
there's a whole lot more to what happened that night.
Because I had written down our conversation from that night verbatim,
and I let him read it, and it was the
first time that he had read what it did to me,
what that night did to me that particular instance. You know,
(32:22):
it affected him and it shocked him, and he didn't
have any recollection of it because he had been drinking
and I was sober. I think the way that Sean
describes it now is like a victim impact statement.
Speaker 10 (32:35):
It hit him like that, That's.
Speaker 16 (32:37):
What it read like. And well, you know the facts
of his story, But as an alcoholic and as a
drunk person, you're not capable of really comprehending, certainly not
in the moment, what the consequences of your actions really are.
And it's one thing to look back at something five
years later, but to actually have the living document that
(32:57):
her words that very night on the page. It doesn't
get more real or more raw than that. And that's
what we wanted to do with this book. We didn't
want to shy away from things that were difficult, because
it is a difficult thing. You got to start from there.
Speaker 17 (33:12):
I would take it chapter by chapter and add my
part to it. This is what happened in my world
on that same event, So it's the same event looking
at it through two different lenses, and I think that's,
you know, not only what happens in a marriage, but
certainly what happens when you're person living with an addict,
and even a recovering addict, because we go into those
(33:35):
chapters too. For me, it was letting everybody know that
it's not just the addict that goes through the crisis.
You know, it's everybody in their orbit, and I was
in Shawn's orbit.
Speaker 1 (33:54):
Help others find the message of recovery. We champion on
the Bubble Hour. Plus get access to the end Tire
back list ad free by joining us on Patreon. Patroon
support helps with the ongoing expense of making free versions
of the show available, as well as the cost to
make new content like our spinoff podcast, Tiny Bubbles. Become
(34:15):
a Bubble Hour patron today at patreon dot com. Slash
the Bubble Hour and help us help others through stories
of strength and hope. I get a lot of email
and direct messages as hosts and producer of the show.
(34:37):
About half of it was feedback from listeners and the
other half was guest pitches, meaning people that wanted to
be on the show for one reason or another. One
day I got a message that was really different. It
just asked, how do you choose guests for your show?
I got these kind of messages all the time, but
there was something about this that just seemed off. I replied,
(34:58):
as I always did, that of the show needed to
be people in recovery with ninety days of abstinence from
alcohol and drugs who were willing to tell their story
about what it was like, how they made a change,
and what it's like now. But there was just something
odd about that exchange. It lacked the usual friendliness of
our community. I didn't think much of it, but I
(35:19):
do remember it. Some people are just synct in their
writing style. It doesn't need to be interpreted as rudeness
or abruptness, but it did stand out. I didn't hear
back from the sender. I wrote them again to ask
if they were interested in participating the show, and got
no reply, while within a short period of time, my
message inbox went from busy to booming. Later I would
(35:39):
find out that that inquiry was actually from someone who
was covertly gathering information to develop a marketing list later
sold to pr firms. I was a little bit annoyed
that someone had used our show in that way. The
upside was I was learning about a ton of authors
I would have never otherwise found. Instead of focusing on
the big names that were already making the round to
(36:00):
other podcasts, I decided to make an effort to shine
a light on recovery resources that don't get as much
attention as some of the bigger names in publishing houses.
Whether they found the Bubble Hour by googling top recovery
shows or hired a PR firm that used a marketing list,
writers from around the world wanted to be part of
the Bubble Hour so they could tell their story to you.
(36:23):
Some of the most interesting conversations I've had have been
with these lesser known recovery writers doing big things a
little off the beaten path. Swimmer Carlin Pipes told a
fascinating story about losing her Olympic dreams to addiction, then
coming back in her thirties to not only win numerous
high level championships, but also to receive a full college scholarship.
(36:48):
In her book The Do Over.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
The Wonders of Sobriety and Recovery were that gratitude and
the coming alive and how everything looked better and tasted better.
In was like, who wouldn't want this compared to the
darkness that I've been to, And to be honest, it
started out very slowly. I gave myself permission to get
back in the water. I started racing and I started
(37:12):
doing really well, and that was really neat because I thought, Wow,
I got my body back, I got my physical body back,
I'm healthy. Swimming really really helped my recovery, just because
it took up time and it gave me something to do,
and it made me feel good about myself. And so
anybody out there that is looking at time and recovery,
I strongly suggest the best drug in the world is exercise,
(37:36):
because it gives you all those good feelings and it
makes you feel good about yourself and there's really not
many side effects. Then I realized I started taking classes
and I got my brain back. I started thinking, wow,
I'm actually a pretty decent student if I'm not distracted
by my other addictions, and that was really cool. And
then eventually I ended up going back to college on
a full swimming scholarship, and hence the name of the
(37:57):
book is called The Do Over Not To Do Over.
All of these things that I completely screwed up the
first time around, and that was that was wonderful.
Speaker 1 (38:12):
Today I'm holding space for American photographer and author Michael Blanchard.
His recent release Through a Sober Lens of Photographer's Journey
combines photography and personal essays to illuminate the recovery experience
and so the beauty and hope beyond the darkness. Michael Blanchard,
Welcome to the Bubble Hour. Your work is absolutely stunning.
Speaker 18 (38:35):
Thank you for having me, Jean, I really appreciate it.
I've learned a lot in my travel about something called
post traumatic growth, where an individual cannot get to a
place that they've managed to get themselves too, in terms
of becoming the person they're supposed to be without going
through the trauma and coming out the other side. I
(38:55):
was on my way down on the final stages of
alcoholism and addiction, and I decided that in desperation, I
was going to start taking Xanax and stop drinking alcohol.
That somehow I would get rid of the habit of
alcohol by staying calm on xanax, and then when the
alcohol urges went away, I would stop the Xanax while
(39:18):
it didn't work. During that period of time, I got
arrested three times in three months for drunk driving. I
completely fell apart. I got sent to a psychiatric hospital
for two weeks to get where I am now. I
didn't have any plan on getting here. It was the
first time in my life I didn't set goals and
work every day to achieve a goal. It was because
(39:40):
I was led someplace for a reason. And when I
was laying in the bed in the psychiatric hospital, a physician,
the medical director of all things, leaned over me and
he said, I used to be you. He said, there
was a time when I had a blood alcohol of
over six hundred and I was on life support here
the health system. His willingness to share his soul with
(40:05):
me created like an energy shift in me.
Speaker 8 (40:08):
In some way.
Speaker 18 (40:10):
I remember saying to myself, if I ever make it
back from all of this, I'm going to be authentic,
just like him. It was just not easy coming back,
but I somehow never drank again, because somehow, when I
went to rehab for three months for the first time
in my life, I started to love myself again and
I felt like I was worth something. I bought a
(40:31):
little camera and I'd go out, and I started noticing
when I would go out at night that suddenly I
got excited about the evening after coming home from work
instead of dreading not drinking alcohol, I would say, Wow,
look at those clouds. I got to get out there
and see this. Maybe I can take a cool picture.
And I would go out and take picture after picture
and learn and learn. I became so much into it.
(40:54):
Photographs can be really powerful. But there's something that when
you look at a photograph and something comes into your
heart that you want to express because of what that
photograph is saying to you, and you write about it
and you attach it, it becomes magical. I was able
to get stuff out of me and almost self psychoanalyze
(41:18):
by writing about my struggles that were prompted by the
photographs that I was taking. I have a gallery on
Martha's Vineyard and people are coming from all over the country,
and sometimes they walk into the gallery and they just
start crying. But what it tells me is that I've
touched them in a way that when they come in,
they're just so emotional because you know, maybe there's something
(41:38):
I said that helped them get through a bad period
or got them into a rehab facility or something and
they want to say thank you. And it's just such
a warm connection with people. And it all came through
these photographs and writing the stories.
Speaker 1 (42:03):
Today we meet Lucy Hall, a woman in successful long
term recovery for more than thirty years, author of Hope Dealer,
a complete guide from Rehab to Recovery, and the subject
of a fantastic documentary called Hope Village. Lucy Hall, Welcome
to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 19 (42:19):
I thank you, Jane, and thank you for that introduction.
I'm honored to hang out with you for.
Speaker 5 (42:24):
A little bit.
Speaker 1 (42:26):
In your book, you write each chapter from three different voices,
the addicts voice, the clinician's voice, and the allies voice.
Speaker 19 (42:34):
So first to the addict, to that person who's still
out there stuff. That part of the book is to
help them to realize that recovery is possible. It's to
encourage and enlighten them on how they can access recovery.
When I speak to the clinician, it is because I
am a clinician at heart. They get to hear some
(42:57):
of the lessons learned. And if you're a clinic like
you could be a license you know, an LPC or
an LMSW or LCSW who've never been in recovery. So
I share some of the plight from Natland, a person
in recovery who's also a clinician, saying, hey, here's how
we can work this thing together. Because when you're working
(43:19):
with people in recovery, they always want to know are
you in recovery? And as a clinician, you don't have
to be in recovery. We're all in recovery from some how.
As a clinician who can say I feel successful and
helpful to my clients is because I know I've checked
these things off. And then of course to the ally,
(43:40):
to that family member, to that friend, to that coworker,
whoever it is. We all know somebody who needs recovery.
Every person knows somebody who's either in recovery or needs recovery,
and so speaking to them about how to do an intervention,
speaking to them about how to best addressing approach somebody
(44:02):
who needs recovery instead of pointing the finger, because the
minute you start pointing a finger at people, they back
up and they start defending themselves. There is not a
person alive that's not recovering from something. We all know
what it's like to come back from someone. There are
so many women who nobody wanted to help them with
(44:22):
their mental health, so they started self medicating. So many
people out there are using as a way of coping
with the voices, the depression, the anxiety, the pain that
they feel in their physical body. Today, everybody that's using
is not using because they don't have nothing else to do.
(44:42):
I'd love to celebrate life, you know, celebrate recovery, celebrate
my milestone, celebrate those things that are important every day,
even in the turmoil we live in in this world today.
I mean everywhere there's turmoil there is. We can focus
on that and let it be a downward spiral, or
we can pray about that and continue to live life
(45:04):
on life terms. We only get one day, so whatever
I can do in this day is what I need
to focus on. There's an opportunity in every day. There
are opportunities to do the right thing, to make yourself
and others better, and to read somebody who needs to
be encouraged. I'd love to encourage people.
Speaker 1 (45:28):
Definitely an encouraging and inspiring voice. Indeed, that was Lucy Hall,
author of Hope Dealer, A Complete Guide to recovery. So
that was just a sample of some of the more
than fifty authors that have been featured on The Bubble
Hour over the years. Check the show notes for links
to purchase some of the books that we talked about today,
and visit the show archives to see some other amazing
(45:50):
writers who have shared their stories of strength and hope
on The Bubble Hour. In the next episode, I'll share
some of my favorite moments from the past decade. Come
back soon, listen in Until then, my friends, please take
good care.
Speaker 5 (46:06):
I own it a dip it not proud, but thats me.
And when I face take a little dignity.
Speaker 6 (46:15):
Not looking for excuses. I just want to be free
from the power weakness.
Speaker 9 (46:22):
Head of me.
Speaker 6 (46:28):
In a dun corners where shame lies to hen.
Speaker 5 (46:36):
Wait with gest dooms because you'll keep it up. Second,
it just stays and wait there to rob you off.
Speaker 6 (46:45):
Your friend, Turn the light on, turn the lad on.
You can't shine away.
Speaker 5 (46:51):
You see a difft not proud, but that was me
and face if I take that a little dignity.
Speaker 6 (47:02):
Another aware excuses. I just want to be free from power.
Oh s, you.
Speaker 5 (47:15):
Don't have to shout it out on main street to me.
You don't need to whisper to confession. The person you
should talk to is look in at you.
Speaker 6 (47:33):
In there and a lot of all matters. Most can always.
Speaker 8 (47:37):
Hear a whare do you see old different?
Speaker 5 (47:41):
I'm not proud, but damns me and when I face,
I take that a little dignity.
Speaker 6 (47:50):
Another excuses, I just want to be free from the
power or yours. When you see a different.
Speaker 5 (48:02):
I'm proud that would be and that face is a
take back a little thing to hear.
Speaker 6 (48:11):
From excuse it. I just want to be free from
the power.
Speaker 19 (48:17):
When free, free, free, free Breeze
This podcast includes frank discussions of mature themes that may
not be suitable for all audiences. Listener discretion is advised.
This podcast is intended to provide encouragement and support through
personal storytelling. The views expressed are the opinions of the
participants and not intended to be medical, legal, clinical, or
(00:21):
professional information or advice of any kind. Welcome to the
Bubble Hour, Welcome to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
Welcome to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Welcome to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 4 (00:35):
Welcome, Welcome, Welcome, Welcome for the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 5 (00:38):
Ownent, a diffent, not praps we and what a face?
Speaker 6 (00:44):
Take a little dignity. Not looking for excuses. I just
want to be free from the power. Believe us head
to be free, free, free, free free.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
I'm Jean McCarthy and you're listening to the Bubble Hour.
Welcome back. This is part seven out of ten in
our tenth and final season. As we look back over
a decade of the Bubble Hour, many notable recovery authors
come to mind as memorable interviews. As the years went by,
the show steadily rose through online rankings as a top
(01:27):
recovery podcast. The Promotions Department from Publishing houses began sending
books to consider, and I soon found myself absolutely swamped
with manuscripts and guest proposals. More than fifty authors have
been featured on the Bubble Hour, including best selling names
like Claire Pooley, Anne DAWSA Johnston, and Amanda air Ward.
(01:49):
We've also featured influential recovery writers like Ruby Warrington, Amy Dresner,
and Erica C. Barnett. Today, I'm thrilled to talk with
a fellow author and blog, the charming, warm, funny Claire Poolly.
Claire's blog, Mummy was a Secret Drinker, began in twenty
fifteen and formed the basis for her first book, a
(02:11):
memoir called The Sober Diaries. It was such a huge success,
and her second book, a novel called The Authenticity Project,
is now available. It's sure to be a huge hit
as well. Here's Claire Pooly.
Speaker 7 (02:24):
I think when I was drinking, I was very selfish,
and I think addicts tend to be because you know,
we spend so much of our mental energy thinking about
where the next drink is coming from. You know, most
of my headspace was filled with am I going to
(02:44):
drink this evening? How much am I going to drink
this evening? What am I going to drink this evening?
Where am I going to buy it? All those sorts
of things constantly interrupting my life. I didn't have the
mental space or the energy, you know, anytime I wasn't
dealing with my addiction, I was dealing with my kids,
my own life. I don't think I was a very
good friend, or a very good wife, or a very
(03:06):
good person for a while, and I didn't see it
when I was in it. But I don't think i'd
helped anybody who wasn't, you know, I wasn't directly related to.
But sometimes it gave me back my self respect In
many ways, you only have the energy to help other
people if you are yourself in a relatively good place,
(03:29):
and I wasn't when I was when I was drinking.
When you're really truthful about your life, nothing can hurt you.
Because nobody was going to turn around and call me
a lush because I'd already done that myself. You know,
I'd already called myself a bad mother.
Speaker 8 (03:44):
I'd already told.
Speaker 7 (03:46):
Everyone that, you know, that my life was out of control,
and that for a long time I wasn't a particularly
good person, So anybody else saying that back to me
was not going to have an effect. That was a
really liberating realization.
Speaker 8 (04:00):
And when you're really.
Speaker 7 (04:01):
Truthful about your life, other people are really kind. When
you make yourself vulnerable, people are really really kind. Since then,
I've had literally thousands of messages from people all over
the world saying what a difference that book made to them,
because they, like me, were feeling really alone. They were
feeling like I was, that my life was over, and
(04:24):
it made them realize that they weren't alone and their
life was only just beginning. The whole idea behind the
Authenticity Project is the idea that everybody lies about their lives,
and we all put on this front that the truth
often is very different. That was really inspired by what
I had done myself. You know, I'd spent years and
years and years hiding the truth. So the book is
(04:46):
about an artist who finds a little notebook and he
writes in it, everybody lies about their lives. What would
happen if you told the truth instead? And he tells
the truth about his life, leaves it in a cafe
where it's picked up by the owner, who reads his
story and reads about how lonely he is, and decides
to track him down and help change his life. And
she writes her own truth and then leaves the book
(05:08):
somewhere else, and the book has passed between six strangers
who all tell the truth about their lives and all
end up meeting each other and changing each other's lives
in miraculous ways. And that really is the recovery community,
isn't it?
Speaker 8 (05:22):
In the You know, it's about.
Speaker 7 (05:24):
People who are ostensibly very different, but who all find
each other and make each other's lives better by being authentic.
It is fiction, but it's very much inspired by my
own life.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
And Elsa Johnston, Welcome to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 9 (05:50):
I think it's just a real joy to imagine that
there's people out there in the listenership to this show
who are curious, who you just know through self selection,
are more curious than most around the subjects that we're
talking about. And because I believe that this is something
(06:13):
that we help one another with and hand on to
one another, and community matters so much that it's a
joy to talk about the profound psychic and spiritual shifts
that can happen and not feel too self conscious or
(06:35):
goofy about the whole thing. It really is transformational recovery.
And sometimes, you know, on a good day, I had,
as you know from reading the book, some major lifes
in recovery. But on a good day I can say
all of this happened for a reason, and there are well,
(06:58):
obviously the book couldn't have happened without my recovery. But
to write that book was a privilege. To be able
to share my experience of recovery and to take the
time in my life and say I will carve ote
this spade, this moment up north with my dogs and
(07:21):
write this book. It was really the joy of my life.
And so this interview is like this was like the book.
You know, you focus on the listenership that you really
believe you're aiming for, which is those who are wrestling
with the issue.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
Excellent books about recovery just keep coming, and you will
want to make room on your bookshelves for something a
little different than the usual how tos and memoirs. The
Sober Lush by Amanda air Ward and Jardine Labert is
a gorgeous keepsake of a book, beautifully design and it's
been written by two accomplished and celebrated writers who happen
(08:09):
to be friends as well as women in recovery. Together,
these two explore all of the ways that their lives
have become richer and fuller in the absence of alcohol,
and how recovery has challenged them to seek out beauty, comfort, joy,
and indulgence with the new superpower of being completely present
and grateful. Amanda is the author of eight novels, most
(08:31):
recently The jet Setters, and Jardine has written six novels,
plus has written for TV and film, including the recently
released movie Endings Beginnings. Both are accomplished and talented, and
yet the sober lush they embark on something new in
exploring their personal stories of recovery and friendship. Amanda and Jardine,
(08:51):
Welcome to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 10 (08:54):
Thank you so much for having me on to be here.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
How does it feel to tell your own story? Are
you both feeling a little vulnerable right now? Are you
taking it in stride? Amanda? How does it feel for you?
Speaker 10 (09:09):
It is not a comfortable place for me at all.
Speaker 11 (09:13):
To some extent, I'm thrilled for it to be out
in the world, because I would have liked to find
a book like this, and I'm really excited at the
thought that maybe someone who needs to quit will decide
to quit or be inspired to drink less from this book.
That would mean everything to me. It will be a
use for all the misery that I went through. But
(09:36):
I'm really uncomfortable talking about it. We talked about this
a little bit. It's you know, AA is anonymous, and
so it's strange to come out and talk about it.
Jardine had been sober longer than me, and when I
got sober, I went through every day and did everything
exactly the.
Speaker 10 (09:53):
Same without wine, and it was terrible. You know.
Speaker 11 (09:57):
I went to the same parties and just stood there
with a a glass of that Fray fake wine or
a Seltzer.
Speaker 10 (10:04):
You know, I didn't have any tools.
Speaker 11 (10:05):
I just was like, well, I'm going to do this
and life's going to be gray, and that's just the
way it is because I.
Speaker 10 (10:10):
Have to quit.
Speaker 11 (10:11):
And then a friend, a mutual friend, said, you know, Amanda,
you should meet my friend Jardine. And I remember it
was so magical for me going to Jardine's house for
the first time, and it was very early in my sobriety,
and I arrived for coffee and her house was just
so welcoming and elegant, and she had books I wanted
(10:33):
to read on her shelves, and we sat and talked,
and you know that incredible connection you have when you
talk with other people in recovery, the right people, when
you just feel like you can say anything. And I cried,
and I snuggled with lovermana.
Speaker 10 (10:51):
I just I looked around and I thought, oh, this
is what I want.
Speaker 11 (10:56):
You know, I don't have to just have a grim,
gray life where I've removed my anthesia. I can build
a whole new, beautiful life filled with incredible things. And
my friendship with Jardine was the first incredible thing. And
I'm and then so together we talked about that and
(11:19):
you'd already gone, you'd already figured a lot of this out, Jardine, some.
Speaker 12 (11:23):
Of it, but our friendship and the conversations we had,
and then the conversation as it turned into this book
just helped me grow so much more. And you know,
I think a man and I did a ton of work,
like because the book required it, zeroing in on the
many different things we thought we would have to give
(11:43):
up and lose. And it's been like a fourth wave
of revelation for me, you know, deeper into sobriety to
see oh yes, you know, communal gathering and eating. That's
been so important to me since I was a kid
because of how I grew up. That is part of
why I clung to drinking, because I didn't want to
(12:04):
give up that that feeling. And so Amanda and I've
been kind of forensically figuring out together, you know, how
to break down this bigger idea of celebrating that sobriety
can be beautiful into the many different little ways of
celebrating the hour that you're in or the thing that
you used to do. The sober lush is an ode
(12:27):
and a roadmap to the technicolor and playful side of sobriety.
So it's not about how to get sober or stay sober.
I think both a man and I are on the
side of you know, that is for an individual to decide.
I could not have gotten sober or using a book.
Some people maybe can. But it's also not a book
about just recovery or just substances. It ends up being
(12:51):
about motorcycle riding and skinny dipping and honey and ice
skating and all these other piece of life, and that
to us mirrors how getting sober was not even about
sobriety in the ways that we thought it was, but
but about living in life. That's the best I can do.
Speaker 8 (13:15):
That's bravo, bravo.
Speaker 6 (13:19):
I'd buy that book.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
I'm holding space for none other than Ruby Warrington, the
author of Sober Curious, and she has a new book out,
a workbook that is fantastic. It's called The Sober Curious Reset.
Speaker 9 (13:41):
I thought of.
Speaker 13 (13:42):
Quitting complete abstinence for life was like being taken up
to the edge of the cliff and someone's saying, just
jump off, just jump off.
Speaker 8 (13:50):
And down the bottom is like Nirvana. It's it's Nirvana down.
They just got a jump.
Speaker 13 (13:55):
Okay, Sure, this way is kind of you know, getting
tooled up, getting a map, getting a backpack, getting supplies,
finding the kind of like rocky path down the mountain,
and then at the bottom, guess what it is the fire.
But it's so much easier to contemplate, Like our human
brain has no reference point forever, so it's almost impossible
(14:20):
to contemplate quitting forever. We don't know how long forever is.
We have no way of knowing quitting for thirty days
is much easier manageable chunk of time, And if you
tool up to do that thirty days, then I think
you're a lot less likely to even want to go
back to drinking how you work, because you will have
discovered so much about the benefits of not drinking and
(14:43):
most importantly, the why am I drinking? What is this
doing for me?
Speaker 7 (14:49):
Okay?
Speaker 13 (14:50):
When I have that information, I can proactively start looking
for other things behaviors, thoughts, practices, activities that do that
thing for me. They don't look the same and they
wouldn't do it in exactly the same way, but I
can start to replace alcohol with something else that does
actually serve me.
Speaker 1 (15:19):
What a story is My Fair Junkie, Amy Dressner's darkly
comic memoir of two long decades in and out of
addiction in multiple forms.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
I wanted to write the book to help people. That
was really the drive behind it. I wanted to help
other addicts feel less alone and feel less ashamed and
less broken, and to give them hope because, as you know,
someone who had relapsed a lot and been in a
lot of rehabs, there was many times where I was like,
I'm just never going to get there. I'm going to
die drug addict. But this is not this is this
is not looking good. I wanted people to know it's
(15:50):
never too late and if you're alive, you've got a chance,
and just don't give up. I also wanted family and
friends of non addicts to kind of get an inside
you of what addiction is like for the addict, Like
what it's like to be in our brain, the convoluted thinking,
the rumination, the comulsion, compulsivity, call the negativity, the self loathing,
(16:11):
like what that's like, which is so amazing to turn
like twenty years of pain and self destruction into a
tool that's helping people. It's like, Wow, I don't regret
a moment of what I went through because it's helped
other people. I know that there's parts that are super
super heavy in the book. I wanted points where there
was some levity, and I also for myself, I needed
(16:35):
to laugh at myself and the circumstances and see the
humor to survive some of that stuff. And there was
definitely parts where I was like, I don't want to
put this on the page, and I just know as
a writer, like that's exactly what you have to fill
on the page, because that is going to be the
thing that someone's going to go, oh my God, thank you,
like you can't hold back if you're trying to look
good in an addiction memoir, like you're not being honest enough.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
Here's Erica C. Barnett, author of Quitter, a memoir of drinking, relapse,
and recovery.
Speaker 14 (17:13):
My book begins with one of many many rock bottoms
that I experienced in my very low bottom alcoholism. I
didn't really start drinking in earnest and heavily until I
was well into my thirties, which I think seems a
little atypical, but is actually pretty common for women.
Speaker 8 (17:31):
I discovered while researching the book.
Speaker 14 (17:34):
I worked with Sarah Happola, who wrote the great book Blackout.
At the Chronicle, it was definitely a drinking culture. Moved
to Seattle, got another job at a publication called The Stranger,
which is the time, was kind of the coolest all
weekly in the country.
Speaker 8 (17:47):
That is when my drinking really got underway.
Speaker 14 (17:51):
The culture of alternative weekly journalism at the time, in
the culture of journalism and politics in general, at least
in Seattle, really revolved around drinking.
Speaker 8 (18:02):
You didn't go out for coffee.
Speaker 14 (18:04):
I mean that concept was like totally unfamiliar to me
until I actually quit drinking and started inviting people out
for coffee. And it felt very awkward. You went out
for drinks. I mean, I drank because I felt uncomfortable
in my own skin. I felt like I wasn't cool enough,
I wasn't smart or clever enough. I just couldn't sort
of meet the standards that I felt the world wanted
(18:27):
me to meet. And the thing that made me feel
more comfortable was having a few drinks. Unfortunately, you know,
I have this genetic predisposition that made it the case
that I became addicted pretty quickly and pretty hard. I
was in this cycle from which I could not escape.
I went to my first detox in my early thirties
(18:50):
in two thousand and eight, and I really thought at
the time that that was all that was going to
be necessary. But I thought that if I went to
this detox and was there for five days and I
cleared all the alcohol out of my system, then I
would have the willpower to accomplish you know, sobriety or
I don't even think I thought of it as sobriety.
(19:11):
I thought of it as a return to normal life.
If I just quit, then it'll be fine. And of
course that's not how addiction works. It is cunning, baffling
and powerful. And I think baffling was the was the
operative word there for me, because when I relapsed the
first time, there was absolutely no reason, there was no trigger.
(19:32):
It wasn't a bad day, it wasn't a good day.
I wasn't celebrating, I wasn't morning. I just thought, hey,
maybe I can drink now. The next five years or
so kind of went like that. The way it usually
happened was I would quit for a little while, I'd
start feeling really good. Because what happens when you quit
physically your body just you know, I mean you know this, Geene,
(19:54):
It just it can be like an amazing transformation, especially
if you have suffered a lot from the physical effects.
Speaker 8 (20:03):
Of drinking, as I did. I mean, I just I
felt great.
Speaker 14 (20:06):
I was like, wow, I'm not hungover, like I just
felt like crap all the time. When I woke up,
I had an immediate need for alcohol. I drank all
day at the end. It was just constant physical and
mental misery. So when I quit, I would feel great
and then eventually I would just decide I didn't need
to be quit anymore, and calling a decision is actually
(20:28):
overstating it. The vodka would land in my cart at
the grocery store, and I wouldn't know how it got there,
and then we'd be off to the races again. This
went on and on and just this endless cycle, and
every time it would get a little bit worse and
a little bit worse, and sometimes it would get a
little bit better. When I talk about rock bottoms and
the rock bottom I hit. There are so many examples
(20:50):
like that that when I was writing the book, my
editor actually cut quite a bit out because it was
getting repetitive, which I think really describes the life of
a late stage alcoholic.
Speaker 8 (21:00):
It's incredibly repetitive.
Speaker 14 (21:02):
So the instance I described in the book is I
got fired from my job and I was going to
pick up my stuff. I got very, very drunk, came
back home from picking up some of my stuff at
the office because I was asked to leave because I
was so drunk, and getting off the train, falling down
on my face, pants falling down to my butt, lying
(21:23):
on the ground in the seattle, pouring rain, and just
wondering if I would make it home, or if you know,
I would die in the bushes, and the headlines would
be about failed writer but died of alcoholism on the sidewalk.
Speaker 8 (21:36):
Outside her house.
Speaker 14 (21:38):
It's sad to describe that event as typical, But the
stuff that I cut from the book were things like
day after day of these individually terrible rock bottom.
Speaker 8 (21:47):
E instances that just didn't make me quit.
Speaker 14 (21:50):
One of the messages that I am trying to convey
in the book is that we like to think of
this idea that there is an identifiable rock bottom That
is true for some people. It's really important to stay
on top of why you got sober in the first place,
and not just the bad things that were happening beforehand,
but the good things that have happened since you got sober.
(22:13):
Being sober is not always a picnic. I mean, you
still have to live your life and stuff still goes wrong.
I think the reason ultimately that I relaped is that
I forgot why I got sober in the first place.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
Do you ever wish for a little bit of recovery
inspiration on the go? Tiny Bubbles is a new podcast
that brings you the best bits of the bubble Hour
podcast in quick little episodes, just fifteen minutes long, but
packed with wisdom, insight, and encouragement to live your life
wholeheartedly and alcohol free. Look for Tiny Bubbles wherever you
(22:53):
get podcasts and subscribe today. Tiny Bubbles little bits of
recovery goodness brought to you by the Bubble Hour. Sometimes
all you need is a little pep talk so you
can get back to living that beautiful life you're building.
(23:16):
Take Good Care as a new collection of recovery readings
inspired by the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 6 (23:21):
If you love the.
Speaker 1 (23:22):
Encouragement and support you find here on this podcast, then
this new book is for you. Visit the Bubblehour dot
com for more information or check the show notes for
a link to purchase. You'll find Take Good Care on
Amazon worldwide. Take Good Care recovery reading inspired by the
Bubble Hour, the perfect gift for yourself and friends. As
(23:48):
a recovery writer myself, I'd connected with other authors around
the world. Popular New Zealand writer Lauda Dan, author of
three books including Missus d Is Going Without, Missus d
Is Going Within, and The Wine O'clock Myth, appeared numerous
times on the show and shared her insights on life
after alcohol.
Speaker 4 (24:07):
My identity was actually fun drinking lotter, and I had
the two things just completely meshed, and I was absolutely
purified that the fun was going to stop, and worse
than that, that I was going to be a boring,
sober loser for the rest of my life and that
no one would want to hang out with me. You know,
(24:30):
I loved being a hostess. I love having fun at
a party, and I didn't think that that was going
to be possible without the alcohol. I was really really
terrified of that. But because I knew I had no
option but to stop drinking because it was getting really bad,
I just had to dive into that fear, because what
else are you going to do? So it was just
(24:52):
a matter of trial and error until I managed to
find the fun again. But absolutely, the fear is real,
and it's terrifying. I mean, you know what it's like
when you're standing on the edge of the cliffs staring
at a life with no alcohol in it and it
looks like a big, deep, dark ocean and you have
to jump into it. It's horrible. Yeah, how can I
(25:16):
be that person that I like? I like the fun lotter?
How can I be her? What if I'm not her
anymore when I take the alcohol away. What if I
don't like who I become. If we're not smiling and
having fun, if we're not on the dance floor, there's
a problem. My twisted drinker's brain was telling me that,
(25:38):
And that's the thing that actually bollocks, because we're not
all fun all of the time. It took a lot
of trial and error and just going out to events,
and you know, at first, I felt really alien in
my own skin and almost like I was wearing a
gorilla suit that no one else could see because I
(26:00):
I had my security blanket, you know, fun persona taken
away from me. And so I was pretty awkward and uncomfortable,
and I would do things like smoke heaps of cigarettes
or have far too many energy drinks to try and
create that vibe that I'd had when I was drinking.
But the longer I went, you know, without drinking, and
(26:21):
the more times I went out to parties and then
occasionally hit on a really good one when I actually
had a really fun time without drinking, the more I
realized the power wasn't in the glass, it was in me,
and if everything lined up for me, I felt good
I was in a good mood. It was a right crowd.
(26:43):
I liked the music or the food or whatever, and
I had a great night. I had a great night.
I mean, I totally had a great night. And I
would be the last on the dance floor and I
would almost feel I was having so much fun, and
then I'd realize, so this isn't about me. This is
about me and the party. But you know, sometimes that
(27:05):
doesn't happen. Either I'm in a bad mood or I
don't like my dress, or it's not my crowd and
I don't feel comfortable or whatever, and I do stand
there and I feel a bit. I wouldn't even say
it's flat, but I'm just not that fun person. But
now I don't mind that because I think that's real too.
(27:26):
So I'm not sort of so desperate for everything to
be the best party ever in the history of the
world every time I go out. So it has been
a settling down, you know, into myself when I'm out.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
Socially, when an author releases a new title, they go
out on a media blitz and talk to as many
outlets as possible to get the word out about their
new book. In the year since the bubble Hour began,
other recovery podcasts have emerged, and I noticed that many
of us would end up with the same guest within
a short period of time. I always work to make
sure that my interviews took a little different tack, and
(28:02):
before I talked to them on air, I asked authors
what they wanted to talk about that no one else
had asked them so far. It can be a little
monotonous for writers on a media tour to just keep
saying the same thing over and over again on different shows,
and I think they always appreciated the chance to freshen
up the approach. I also made a rule for myself
to always read the book, all of it before interviewing
(28:24):
an author, and it may surprise you to hear that
this is unusual and it always meant a lot to
the guests. I hope my preparedness made your experience as
a listener more enjoyable as well, and help the guests
to shine their best and brightest. The same Internet and
social media that creates healing connections through recovery blogs, podcasts,
recovery support groups is also the source of the problem
(28:47):
in so many ways, as today's guest shows through her
memoir Highlight Reel, author Emily Lynn Paulson peels back the
layer of deception she unwittingly employed to mask the chaos
and pain behind the beautiful images she showed to the world. Emily,
Welcome to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 8 (29:03):
What I thought.
Speaker 15 (29:03):
Would really be me writing about a mom getting sober
turned into this memoir of these patterns and these behaviors
that had really shown up through my entire life. And
just like you said, with social media being very positive
and connecting and also being very detrimental, I was the
(29:25):
person who looked like they had it all, and I
was really able to hide all of these behaviors and
these addictions behind those little squares on social media. My
job was going well, my family looked happy, and I
was falling deeper and deeper and deeper into my addictions.
And really throughout my whole life. I found that I
had done that through geographically relocating, trying to run away
(29:49):
from one problem, trying to reinvent myself constantly, but never
really getting to the root of why I was drinking.
Speaker 8 (29:56):
Or using in the first place.
Speaker 15 (30:00):
Part of my downfall, I think, was that I didn't
deal with things at all. Things happened, and I again,
like you said, I closed the lid and I sat
on it. I didn't deal with it. I didn't look
at it. I just assumed I was fine because it
wasn't affecting me the way I thought it should. Maybe
I was really letting other people tell me who I was,
(30:22):
and then I was just extrapolating on that by posting
all the pretty photos and all of the good things
and sharing all of the good things. And it was
a vicious cycle because I was making myself look better
than I was to other people and knowing inside that
I didn't match up to that. So I would say
that was really a theme through my whole life is
trying to figure out who I was. And I did
(30:43):
not even know who I was until I got sober,
and so I feel like the last three years really
has been finding out who I am and liking who
I am, and finding out.
Speaker 8 (30:53):
What I like, what I don't like.
Speaker 15 (30:55):
What feels good, what doesn't feel good, what tastes good,
what doesn't taste good, all of those things that you
should developed through your life. I've really started learning about
just in the last few years.
Speaker 1 (31:04):
Here's Canadian musician Sean mccannon his wife Andrea Argonne, talking
about the experience of writing a book together to really
flesh out both sides of the story about marriage and
recovery in their book One Good Reason.
Speaker 16 (31:18):
I spent about a year writing my story and that
was a hard thing to do. But at the end
of the year we read it, I just didn't feel
like it was the whole story. It didn't feel complete
to me. Everything was truthful, and it was. It was difficult,
but it wasn't all there. And then Andrea had been
keeping a journal in real time during a lot of
(31:38):
the events, certainly in our relationship. She showed me a
couple of those journal entries. They were very eye opening
and sobering for me. That was the other side of
the story. So we decided to write the book together
so we'd have a comprehensive look at what the truth
really was from every angle. I don't think you can
tell a story of a marriage from one side that marriage.
Speaker 17 (32:01):
He showed me a particular chapter that he was writing
and his memory of it, and then I was like, WHOA,
there's a whole lot more to what happened that night.
Because I had written down our conversation from that night verbatim,
and I let him read it, and it was the
first time that he had read what it did to me,
what that night did to me that particular instance. You know,
(32:22):
it affected him and it shocked him, and he didn't
have any recollection of it because he had been drinking
and I was sober. I think the way that Sean
describes it now is like a victim impact statement.
Speaker 10 (32:35):
It hit him like that, That's.
Speaker 16 (32:37):
What it read like. And well, you know the facts
of his story, But as an alcoholic and as a
drunk person, you're not capable of really comprehending, certainly not
in the moment, what the consequences of your actions really are.
And it's one thing to look back at something five
years later, but to actually have the living document that
(32:57):
her words that very night on the page. It doesn't
get more real or more raw than that. And that's
what we wanted to do with this book. We didn't
want to shy away from things that were difficult, because
it is a difficult thing. You got to start from there.
Speaker 17 (33:12):
I would take it chapter by chapter and add my
part to it. This is what happened in my world
on that same event, So it's the same event looking
at it through two different lenses, and I think that's,
you know, not only what happens in a marriage, but
certainly what happens when you're person living with an addict,
and even a recovering addict, because we go into those
(33:35):
chapters too. For me, it was letting everybody know that
it's not just the addict that goes through the crisis.
You know, it's everybody in their orbit, and I was
in Shawn's orbit.
Speaker 1 (33:54):
Help others find the message of recovery. We champion on
the Bubble Hour. Plus get access to the end Tire
back list ad free by joining us on Patreon. Patroon
support helps with the ongoing expense of making free versions
of the show available, as well as the cost to
make new content like our spinoff podcast, Tiny Bubbles. Become
(34:15):
a Bubble Hour patron today at patreon dot com. Slash
the Bubble Hour and help us help others through stories
of strength and hope. I get a lot of email
and direct messages as hosts and producer of the show.
(34:37):
About half of it was feedback from listeners and the
other half was guest pitches, meaning people that wanted to
be on the show for one reason or another. One
day I got a message that was really different. It
just asked, how do you choose guests for your show?
I got these kind of messages all the time, but
there was something about this that just seemed off. I replied,
(34:58):
as I always did, that of the show needed to
be people in recovery with ninety days of abstinence from
alcohol and drugs who were willing to tell their story
about what it was like, how they made a change,
and what it's like now. But there was just something
odd about that exchange. It lacked the usual friendliness of
our community. I didn't think much of it, but I
(35:19):
do remember it. Some people are just synct in their
writing style. It doesn't need to be interpreted as rudeness
or abruptness, but it did stand out. I didn't hear
back from the sender. I wrote them again to ask
if they were interested in participating the show, and got
no reply, while within a short period of time, my
message inbox went from busy to booming. Later I would
(35:39):
find out that that inquiry was actually from someone who
was covertly gathering information to develop a marketing list later
sold to pr firms. I was a little bit annoyed
that someone had used our show in that way. The
upside was I was learning about a ton of authors
I would have never otherwise found. Instead of focusing on
the big names that were already making the round to
(36:00):
other podcasts, I decided to make an effort to shine
a light on recovery resources that don't get as much
attention as some of the bigger names in publishing houses.
Whether they found the Bubble Hour by googling top recovery
shows or hired a PR firm that used a marketing list,
writers from around the world wanted to be part of
the Bubble Hour so they could tell their story to you.
(36:23):
Some of the most interesting conversations I've had have been
with these lesser known recovery writers doing big things a
little off the beaten path. Swimmer Carlin Pipes told a
fascinating story about losing her Olympic dreams to addiction, then
coming back in her thirties to not only win numerous
high level championships, but also to receive a full college scholarship.
(36:48):
In her book The Do Over.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
The Wonders of Sobriety and Recovery were that gratitude and
the coming alive and how everything looked better and tasted better.
In was like, who wouldn't want this compared to the
darkness that I've been to, And to be honest, it
started out very slowly. I gave myself permission to get
back in the water. I started racing and I started
(37:12):
doing really well, and that was really neat because I thought, Wow,
I got my body back, I got my physical body back,
I'm healthy. Swimming really really helped my recovery, just because
it took up time and it gave me something to do,
and it made me feel good about myself. And so
anybody out there that is looking at time and recovery,
I strongly suggest the best drug in the world is exercise,
(37:36):
because it gives you all those good feelings and it
makes you feel good about yourself and there's really not
many side effects. Then I realized I started taking classes
and I got my brain back. I started thinking, wow,
I'm actually a pretty decent student if I'm not distracted
by my other addictions, and that was really cool. And
then eventually I ended up going back to college on
a full swimming scholarship, and hence the name of the
(37:57):
book is called The Do Over Not To Do Over.
All of these things that I completely screwed up the
first time around, and that was that was wonderful.
Speaker 1 (38:12):
Today I'm holding space for American photographer and author Michael Blanchard.
His recent release Through a Sober Lens of Photographer's Journey
combines photography and personal essays to illuminate the recovery experience
and so the beauty and hope beyond the darkness. Michael Blanchard,
Welcome to the Bubble Hour. Your work is absolutely stunning.
Speaker 18 (38:35):
Thank you for having me, Jean, I really appreciate it.
I've learned a lot in my travel about something called
post traumatic growth, where an individual cannot get to a
place that they've managed to get themselves too, in terms
of becoming the person they're supposed to be without going
through the trauma and coming out the other side. I
(38:55):
was on my way down on the final stages of
alcoholism and addiction, and I decided that in desperation, I
was going to start taking Xanax and stop drinking alcohol.
That somehow I would get rid of the habit of
alcohol by staying calm on xanax, and then when the
alcohol urges went away, I would stop the Xanax while
(39:18):
it didn't work. During that period of time, I got
arrested three times in three months for drunk driving. I
completely fell apart. I got sent to a psychiatric hospital
for two weeks to get where I am now. I
didn't have any plan on getting here. It was the
first time in my life I didn't set goals and
work every day to achieve a goal. It was because
(39:40):
I was led someplace for a reason. And when I
was laying in the bed in the psychiatric hospital, a physician,
the medical director of all things, leaned over me and
he said, I used to be you. He said, there
was a time when I had a blood alcohol of
over six hundred and I was on life support here
the health system. His willingness to share his soul with
(40:05):
me created like an energy shift in me.
Speaker 8 (40:08):
In some way.
Speaker 18 (40:10):
I remember saying to myself, if I ever make it
back from all of this, I'm going to be authentic,
just like him. It was just not easy coming back,
but I somehow never drank again, because somehow, when I
went to rehab for three months for the first time
in my life, I started to love myself again and
I felt like I was worth something. I bought a
(40:31):
little camera and I'd go out, and I started noticing
when I would go out at night that suddenly I
got excited about the evening after coming home from work
instead of dreading not drinking alcohol, I would say, Wow,
look at those clouds. I got to get out there
and see this. Maybe I can take a cool picture.
And I would go out and take picture after picture
and learn and learn. I became so much into it.
(40:54):
Photographs can be really powerful. But there's something that when
you look at a photograph and something comes into your
heart that you want to express because of what that
photograph is saying to you, and you write about it
and you attach it, it becomes magical. I was able
to get stuff out of me and almost self psychoanalyze
(41:18):
by writing about my struggles that were prompted by the
photographs that I was taking. I have a gallery on
Martha's Vineyard and people are coming from all over the country,
and sometimes they walk into the gallery and they just
start crying. But what it tells me is that I've
touched them in a way that when they come in,
they're just so emotional because you know, maybe there's something
(41:38):
I said that helped them get through a bad period
or got them into a rehab facility or something and
they want to say thank you. And it's just such
a warm connection with people. And it all came through
these photographs and writing the stories.
Speaker 1 (42:03):
Today we meet Lucy Hall, a woman in successful long
term recovery for more than thirty years, author of Hope Dealer,
a complete guide from Rehab to Recovery, and the subject
of a fantastic documentary called Hope Village. Lucy Hall, Welcome
to the Bubble Hour.
Speaker 19 (42:19):
I thank you, Jane, and thank you for that introduction.
I'm honored to hang out with you for.
Speaker 5 (42:24):
A little bit.
Speaker 1 (42:26):
In your book, you write each chapter from three different voices,
the addicts voice, the clinician's voice, and the allies voice.
Speaker 19 (42:34):
So first to the addict, to that person who's still
out there stuff. That part of the book is to
help them to realize that recovery is possible. It's to
encourage and enlighten them on how they can access recovery.
When I speak to the clinician, it is because I
am a clinician at heart. They get to hear some
(42:57):
of the lessons learned. And if you're a clinic like
you could be a license you know, an LPC or
an LMSW or LCSW who've never been in recovery. So
I share some of the plight from Natland, a person
in recovery who's also a clinician, saying, hey, here's how
we can work this thing together. Because when you're working
(43:19):
with people in recovery, they always want to know are
you in recovery? And as a clinician, you don't have
to be in recovery. We're all in recovery from some how.
As a clinician who can say I feel successful and
helpful to my clients is because I know I've checked
these things off. And then of course to the ally,
(43:40):
to that family member, to that friend, to that coworker,
whoever it is. We all know somebody who needs recovery.
Every person knows somebody who's either in recovery or needs recovery,
and so speaking to them about how to do an intervention,
speaking to them about how to best addressing approach somebody
(44:02):
who needs recovery instead of pointing the finger, because the
minute you start pointing a finger at people, they back
up and they start defending themselves. There is not a
person alive that's not recovering from something. We all know
what it's like to come back from someone. There are
so many women who nobody wanted to help them with
(44:22):
their mental health, so they started self medicating. So many
people out there are using as a way of coping
with the voices, the depression, the anxiety, the pain that
they feel in their physical body. Today, everybody that's using
is not using because they don't have nothing else to do.
(44:42):
I'd love to celebrate life, you know, celebrate recovery, celebrate
my milestone, celebrate those things that are important every day,
even in the turmoil we live in in this world today.
I mean everywhere there's turmoil there is. We can focus
on that and let it be a downward spiral, or
we can pray about that and continue to live life
(45:04):
on life terms. We only get one day, so whatever
I can do in this day is what I need
to focus on. There's an opportunity in every day. There
are opportunities to do the right thing, to make yourself
and others better, and to read somebody who needs to
be encouraged. I'd love to encourage people.
Speaker 1 (45:28):
Definitely an encouraging and inspiring voice. Indeed, that was Lucy Hall,
author of Hope Dealer, A Complete Guide to recovery. So
that was just a sample of some of the more
than fifty authors that have been featured on The Bubble
Hour over the years. Check the show notes for links
to purchase some of the books that we talked about today,
and visit the show archives to see some other amazing
(45:50):
writers who have shared their stories of strength and hope
on The Bubble Hour. In the next episode, I'll share
some of my favorite moments from the past decade. Come
back soon, listen in Until then, my friends, please take
good care.
Speaker 5 (46:06):
I own it a dip it not proud, but thats me.
And when I face take a little dignity.
Speaker 6 (46:15):
Not looking for excuses. I just want to be free
from the power weakness.
Speaker 9 (46:22):
Head of me.
Speaker 6 (46:28):
In a dun corners where shame lies to hen.
Speaker 5 (46:36):
Wait with gest dooms because you'll keep it up. Second,
it just stays and wait there to rob you off.
Speaker 6 (46:45):
Your friend, Turn the light on, turn the lad on.
You can't shine away.
Speaker 5 (46:51):
You see a difft not proud, but that was me
and face if I take that a little dignity.
Speaker 6 (47:02):
Another aware excuses. I just want to be free from power.
Oh s, you.
Speaker 5 (47:15):
Don't have to shout it out on main street to me.
You don't need to whisper to confession. The person you
should talk to is look in at you.
Speaker 6 (47:33):
In there and a lot of all matters. Most can always.
Speaker 8 (47:37):
Hear a whare do you see old different?
Speaker 5 (47:41):
I'm not proud, but damns me and when I face,
I take that a little dignity.
Speaker 6 (47:50):
Another excuses, I just want to be free from the
power or yours. When you see a different.
Speaker 5 (48:02):
I'm proud that would be and that face is a
take back a little thing to hear.
Speaker 6 (48:11):
From excuse it. I just want to be free from
the power.
Speaker 19 (48:17):
When free, free, free, free Breeze
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