I know some of you might be new here and probably trying to put the pieces together with how and why a 6’2”, 240lb ex-NFL athlete with the neck the size of some people’s thighs is always smiling and and talking about vulnerability and inner healing. So, let me formally introduce myself.
My name is Caleb and I grew up on a farm in Texas where I walked a pig. Yes, a pig. I also played football and I was kind of good.
Football landed me at West Point where I would start all four years and make national news when I became the 2nd player in the history of West Point to get drafted in the NFL. (I had to wait 2.5 years before I could play because of a policy reversal, but that’s the longer version. See below)
But, it was in the NFL, the middle of my child-hood dream and the very thing I’ve been chasing my entire life, that I began to self-destruct.
Despite being the biggest , fastest and strongest I’ve ever been, all the pain I ignored and masked as ambition was coming to the surface and I could no longer hide behind the facade that I spent years perfecting.
Like a bomb, the NFL applied just enough pressure on my heart and it left my life in fragments.
Knowing that something needed to change, I somehow found the courage to make a soulful shift that would forever change my life. Through a series of unexpected events, I found myself packing my bags and moving to Canada where I would go on and become a glorified janitor of a church so that I could began to heal the emotional trauma that was keeping me stuck and miserable in life.
No seriously. I slept on the basement floor of a boiler room, worked for a church and created the physical and emotional space that was needed for me to begin to expand my life—consciously.
Note: (It’s important to note that while the church played a major role in my life during this season, I’m not affiliated with any specific church or organized religion. This specific church just happened to be the safe space that I needed to begin to shed the layers of self-protection and step into the vulnerability that was needed to begin to heal.)