There's Something in the Barn

Send us your movie recommendations!

Welcome to our holiday episode, which marks the end of the season! Captain Wilson will return in 2026.

This week, Jay is back to cover the 2023 Norwegian comedy horror film, "There's Something in the Barn"! Directed by Magnus Martens, it stars Martin Starr, Amrita Acharia, and Kiran Shah. 

Want to know what's in the barn? Grab some hot chocolate and sit back and relax.

The film discussion begins around 31:24.

Episode Transcript

Captain (00:14):
How's it going?

Wilson (00:15):
It's going pretty well.
We're uh we're here in person.

Captain (00:18):
Oh wow, we are here in person.
Who knew?

Wilson (00:21):
I can see you from across the table.

Captain (00:23):
I see we have some intro things here, but I feel
like these intro things mightwant to be discussed with all of
the attendees.

Wilson (00:30):
All of the oh, so do we have special guests for the
curve?

Captain (00:33):
I mean, and I mean we could have them sit.
Or we could reveal the curtain.

Wilson (00:39):
Pop them in curtain number one.

Jay (00:43):
This curtain is kind of hard to move.
Alright, I'm out of the curtainnow.

Captain (00:47):
Oh, you got stuck in there?
Yeah, I got stuck in there.

Jay (00:49):
It's me.

Captain (00:52):
Yes.

Jay (00:52):
It's me, Jay.

Wilson (00:54):
Um mystery voice, you just don't say the entire time.

Jay (00:58):
Disembodied voice just floating along.

Captain (01:02):
Okay.
Um, well, Wilson, did you wantto um I see you put some stuff
in here?

Wilson (01:08):
Uh yeah.
I mean, I know um did we talkabout it last time?
I feel like we forgot maybeWelcome to Dairy.

Captain (01:16):
Yeah, it's really good.

Wilson (01:17):
It's it's wonderful.

Captain (01:19):
Um it's really they're really getting into it with the
clown, and I love that.

Wilson (01:23):
Yeah.
I was like, I wasn't sure howlong it would take to get Bill
Skarsgard to actually show up.

Captain (01:28):
Okay, that is Bill though.

Wilson (01:30):
Yeah.
Okay, I would.
And he's also he is anexecutive producer on the show.
Like he's been in the creditsas like executive producer.
Uh but yeah.
His reveal what do you think ofhis reveal?
Like that episode.

Captain (01:43):
The very the one in the graveyard, or you mean like
actually saw like Pennywise.
Oh, it's scripy.
He's his like um Jaguar orcougar running that he's doing
towards the kids.

Wilson (01:56):
Did you believe that like that kid was really alive?

Captain (02:00):
I thought it really was him, but as as he goes down
there and he's acting reallyweird, yeah.
I think he I I guess I wasn'texpecting him to turn because I
don't know, I just wasn'texpecting it, but it was really
good reveal.

Jay (02:12):
I I did think it was suspicious that he was trying to
get them all to the ball.

Captain (02:15):
Yeah, but he was so rel no, he was so reluctant to go
down.

Jay (02:18):
Yeah, but like I felt like you know, it seemed very, very
for me if that was theconclusion that was reached by
the group.
I was like, oh, that's notgood.
So I mean they blamed that.

Wilson (02:27):
Well, you're smarter than me because I did not see
that coming.
I mean, like the in the 30seconds leading up to the
reveal, I was like, okay.
But yeah, the the whole earlierpart of the episode, I I would
I did not see that coming.

Jay (02:40):
Yeah.
The um it's it's a good show.
The uh the reveal for Pennywiseis good too.

Captain (02:45):
Yeah, uh my favorite part, I think, uh it might be
that.
I st I still really like thatscene in the beginning of them
in the movie theater andeverything goes to chaos.
Oh, yeah.

Jay (02:55):
I still wish I didn't see a spoiler on that.
Oh, I had no idea what wascoming.
So that was really shocking.
Uh that that first that was thefirst episode, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, that was shocking.
I was like, wait, what?
Yeah.
So yeah, they did a good jobwith that.
I um the special effects arecrazy.

Captain (03:14):
Oh, yeah.
I wonder how expensive thatshow is.

Jay (03:17):
Oh, those kid actors are probably pretty cheap.
Well, yeah, they well, theymake up for it with all of the
like every episode there's someshow.

Captain (03:24):
Is anybody in that show famous besides Bill Skarsgard?
Skarskard.

Wilson (03:27):
Who was the um the dad, I think.
Uh the major?
I think he's he's in things,but not like A-list.

Captain (03:34):
Oh, wait, Dexter's dad's in there.

Wilson (03:36):
Oh, yeah, James from R.
Yeah, but he's not.

Captain (03:39):
His name's James?
I had no idea.

Jay (03:42):
You didn't know his name?

Captain (03:43):
No, he's Dexter's dad.
He loves Dexter's Daniel.
He's Dexter's dad.
Okay.

Jay (03:47):
Jimmy.
It's weird to hear him speakand not hear the sentence in
with Dexter's.

Captain (03:51):
I know.
I I yeah, we say that when wewatch it.
It's like, where's like a I'mdisappointed, Dexter?

Wilson (03:57):
Yeah, I'm expecting like a lecturing tone.
Yeah.

Captain (04:01):
And he's kind of like a little sussy, a little, you
know, sneaky here and there.

Wilson (04:04):
Yeah.
Yeah.

Captain (04:06):
Um, I really do like the show.
It's pretty good.

Wilson (04:08):
And the characters are all pretty good.
No, they're pretty good, yeah.

Captain (04:11):
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm not mad at any ofthem.
Like, you know, like takes meout of the show, it's so bad.

Jay (04:18):
So they also set up stuff from like Doctor Sleep, which I
was like, made me want torewatch that movie because I
love that movie.

Captain (04:26):
Top four.

Jay (04:27):
Uh no, it's a good movie, but I just I don't know why I
didn't see that coming.
It's obvious when they revealit, but it's like, oh, I s I
didn't I I didn't even thinkabout that.

Wilson (04:37):
I wonder how confusing that was for people that like
either didn't read the book ordidn't see the movie of like
what's so special about this boxthat Pennywise like wants to
open.

Jay (04:46):
Yes, I could see that for sure.

Captain (04:47):
I mean, but he does explain it in the next episode,
but still, like I like the umthe Pennywise history that they
give us.

Wilson (04:53):
Yes, that's and the 13 columns and stuff.
I think that's like one of myfavorite parts about this show
is that they're giving us likethe lore behind Pennywise.

Captain (05:01):
Did you read that book and it says does that say that
stuff in there or no?

Wilson (05:04):
Um no, like I did read the book and it touches on each
of the time periods.
Like I know what's basicallygonna happen for the most part
in the next episode, but youdon't like they're they're
adding more to the story that'snot covered in the world.

Captain (05:17):
They don't talk about the 13 columns and the security
of the forest and all thatstuff.

Wilson (05:21):
I don't think there was anything about like breaking off
a piece of the thing.

Captain (05:25):
I I like I like that they're adding that then.
It's nice to get thatbackground, and I'm not mad
about how they do it, so.

Jay (05:32):
Um, what did you think of the reveal that the woman's been
in on it the whole time?
Ooh, uh Bob Gray's.
I didn't do that at all.
I was just I thought she was arandom psychologist.

Captain (05:44):
Oh, that's right.
Yeah, that's kinda random.

Jay (05:47):
Yeah, it it really was, but I wasn't I I didn't hate the
twist.
I I thought um because it's notshe's not in a no-one, you
know, she's she's related tothat she's in a romantic
relationship with one of the actthe characters that is like
being hunted.

Captain (06:01):
Yeah, but like I still don't understand.
So like she loves the clown.

Wilson (06:06):
Like, what's the I think the idea is that Pennywise,
like, her dad was Pennywise theclown, right?
But it like I guess killed himor whatever, took over that
persona and it's a good one.

Captain (06:17):
Yeah, and she just misses psychotically thinks it's
her dad or misses him.
Okay.

Wilson (06:22):
That was a fun scene too, where she like called him
papa or whatever, and Pennywisewas like, uh but I did see, I
don't know if you saw thisonline, and I didn't make this
connection, but the internet ofcourse did that her character is
the old lady in at chapter twothat Beverly goes to visit.
Oh but it's really Pennywiseand in like a suit or whatever.

Jay (06:45):
Oh, yeah.
Do you remember that?
It's Mrs.
Kirsch.

Wilson (06:48):
Yeah.
Whoa.

Jay (06:49):
Whoa.
So does she well, I guess we'llfind out what happens to her in
this series, but I guess shemakes it out if she's at least
impersonated in it chapter two.
Yeah.
Maybe not.
Yeah, we'll see what happens.
I don't know.

Captain (07:04):
Yeah, no, really good show.
Uh I is do we have what two orthree episodes left or
something?

Wilson (07:09):
I I feel like there's like eight and what was that,
episode six that just aired lastyear?

Captain (07:13):
Yeah, that sounds right.
Yeah, yeah.

Jay (07:14):
Yeah, there's like one or two left, I think.
Okay.

Wilson (07:16):
I mean, it is getting to like it does feel like we're
getting very close to like aclimate dick.
So I don't know if they'veannounced it yet or not, or if
we know, but like any futureseasons.
Like, are they gonna skip todifferent like another 20
seconds or because like I don'tit wouldn't make sense, I guess,
if they stuck with these kids.

Captain (07:37):
Uh-uh.

Wilson (07:38):
It wouldn't, yeah.

Jay (07:39):
Well, I mean, it could be follow so like the first episode
kind of follows the sameformula that they were it movie
does where like you have acharacter whose POV you're
following, and then at the endof their little c story arc they
die.
They do that in the firstepisode, so I wonder if they'll
do something similar with theseason, whereas the second
season is like the kid's justolder and they're return to

(08:00):
dairy.

Captain (08:01):
The plan, this is the plan.
Okay, and it hasn't beenofficially renewed yet, but the
first season is supposed to becovering Pennywise's era in
1962.
The second season's gonna goeven further back, 1935.
Oh the third season's gonna goeven further back, 1908.

Wilson (08:15):
Okay.
Oh wow.

Captain (08:16):
Yeah, so actually that is the initial plan was three
seasons where they keep goingback every 27 years.
Because we've already seenforward with the movies.

Jay (08:23):
A bit of uh Fear Street vibe, right?
Because of Fear Street.
Oh, I love that.

Captain (08:28):
That's true.

Jay (08:29):
That was a really good point.

Captain (08:32):
They haven't officially done a season two renewal.

Wilson (08:34):
I feel like they're gonna, I mean, I guess we'll see
how the penale goes, but umwhat's the viewership like uh I
mean I feel like it's good.
They um they tease it in thetheme song, but there is uh in
the past, it's covered in thebook, but I I'm really excited
to if they cover it.
But in the theme song, you seelike an exploding factory.

Captain (08:54):
The new song is so creepy.
It's so creepy.

Wilson (08:57):
I'm I hope it gets renewed because I'd like to see
I'll watch like as much as theyput out.

Jay (09:02):
Opening scenes from episode one of this TV show are like
unhinged.
It's like the kids gettingpicked up by the family, and
they're just saying increasinglycrazier and crazier things, and
I'm like, what is happening?
And like I was like, oh wow.
So it really sets the the thestage for the rest of the show.
Like, oh, this is what we'redoing.

Captain (09:22):
Oh, it's like okay, we're just starting at 100 off
the off the premiere of itWelcome to Dairy on HBO
attracted 5.7 million viewersacross the platforms in the
first three days.
That made it the third highestpremiere ever in the middle.

Jay (09:34):
So it's getting renewed then 100%.

Captain (09:36):
Should, yeah.
I mean it's around an 80% onMountain Tanas right now.

Wilson (09:41):
That's pretty good.
The only question is now withthis Netflix merger, like now.
Oh my god.

Captain (09:46):
Fuck some stuff up.
Dumpster fire.
Yeah.

Jay (09:50):
We'll see.
I mean.
What a time.
I saw Paramount might beputting in a rival bid that they
said is technically supposed tobe higher, so I don't know.

Captain (09:58):
Is that better?

Jay (09:59):
Probably not.
You can't basically if any ofthese if the if any of these
mergers happen, you're gonna endup with like only three
streaming companies, really.
Yeah.

Captain (10:06):
Like Apple TV, Disney, and then they're all gonna
eventually combine together andit'll be c it'll be uh uh
everything's just Disney Plus.
It'll be um cable again.
Yeah, it'll just be anotherDisney Flicks, yeah.
Just one one streaming and it'sc and it's essentially cable at
the time.

Jay (10:23):
Yeah, but the difference here is that they own the movie
studios, so yeah, that's right.
It's not just TV studios, likeand they've already just showed
a disposition towards not likingreleasing things in theaters,
so it's like oh.

Wilson (10:36):
Yeah, so that's why like I have if it's if a company's
gonna buy it, I just like can wenot do Netflix?
Yeah, just yeah.

Captain (10:44):
Speaking of Hollywood, sorry.
We went to Steel Citicon today.

Wilson (10:49):
Oh yeah, it was very fun.
You got you got a pretty coolpicture.
I met a pretty cool person.

Captain (10:55):
Yeah, I met the sir.

Wilson (10:59):
I don't think he's not knighted, yeah.

Captain (11:02):
In my head he is.
Um Robert Patrick, so d akaAgent Dogget from X-Files.

Jay (11:09):
And Terminator 2.
Yeah.

Captain (11:11):
Okay.
And Peacemaker.

Jay (11:12):
Yeah, I think he's the blue dragon in Peacemaker or the
white dragon.

Captain (11:15):
And he's in Sopranos, right?

Jay (11:17):
Yeah, he's in a few episodes of Sopranos.

Captain (11:19):
Um, but yeah, I mean, he's I mean, he's Agent Dogget.
But oh my gosh, it was reallynice meeting him.
And I wore my X-Files shirt andI had my alien uh abduction
earrings on.

Wilson (11:28):
Yeah, he said he called you to like, oh, you're an
X-Files girl.

Captain (11:31):
No, no, he said you're the X-Files girl.

Jay (11:33):
Oh, the X-File.
Okay.

Captain (11:35):
You're the X-Files girl.

Jay (11:36):
I guess he expects one or two per like con he goes to.

Wilson (11:39):
You but how I don't understand.

Captain (11:41):
One or two.

Wilson (11:42):
How will you be like the only like there have to be
other X-Files people?

Jay (11:45):
I didn't see any other people with X-Files stuff on
their line.

Captain (11:49):
Which is crazy.

Wilson (11:49):
It is crazy.

Captain (11:50):
It's like the best show ever.

Jay (11:53):
I mean pick back up when it gets reboot.
Potentially.

Captain (11:57):
Oh, it would be nice to see him in yeah, if if X-Files
gets rebooted the way RyanKugler, right?

Jay (12:01):
Yeah, Ryan Kugler's supposed to be.

Captain (12:02):
Yeah, they probably would bring Scully or Dog it
back or or even uh Reyes.

Jay (12:08):
Probably anyone they can get.

Captain (12:09):
Yeah, I don't think DeCovny would come.

Jay (12:11):
Really?
He's like dumb with X-Filesentirely.

Captain (12:14):
Um he's just um really about like self uh growth.

Wilson (12:21):
I don't know.
I kind of feel like if the payis right and Jillian Anderson's
like, come on, let's do it.

Captain (12:25):
Yeah, but I don't think him and Julian Anderson are
betty buddy buddy like that.

Jay (12:29):
Who do who's who's who's uh does anyone know who's gonna be
rebooting it, like the company?
So I feel like if Apple TV cutsyou a fat check, you are doing
it.

Captain (12:36):
This is very loose plans.
They're very loose.
So I I don't think there'sfull, you know.

Wilson (12:43):
I think they've I think Gillian and David have like
resolved their cookies though.
Like Did you listen to thatpodcast?

Captain (12:49):
No, I didn't.
I I don't no no, I'm not sayingthat they hate each other.
I'm just saying I don't thinkthey're like chit-chat, you
know, they're not on FaceTime.
They're not like I don't thinkshe'd be like, come on, man.

Wilson (12:58):
Money money curses a lot of problems.
Well, uh sorry, I mean like doyou believe that like they had
like they actually had a flingduring the show?
I don't think so.
People really think they likewith all the tension, there was
like so much tension.

Captain (13:13):
They there was a lot of sexual like they have
connection or or chemistry, butI don't think so.

Wilson (13:18):
How long did the show run?
It was like ten seasons.
They left well, he left afterseason seven or like during
season seven, and then on Scullywas like a guest star for a
couple seasons.

Captain (13:30):
There's that famous magazine cover that I think
really um like fueled the flame.
Do you know what I'm talkingabout?

Jay (13:37):
I feel like it's hard to think that they at least in my
mind, that long, I feel like onset, unless they really didn't
like each other for most of it,then maybe not.

Captain (13:44):
But if they this Rolling Stones cover, it's like
famous and it like really fueledthe flame.
I think I think this is when XFiles was huge.

Wilson (13:50):
I think they had a raisin cover.
You think they really have a cI think that I think they slept
together at least once.

Captain (13:56):
Oh my god, Wilson!

Jay (13:58):
The thing in Hollywood, like how many couples do you
know that like met on set andthey play love interests or were
like close characters in ashow?
Yeah, like Dexter um uhDexter's wife.
Oh yeah, Jennifer Carpenter,Deborah.

Captain (14:11):
Yeah, but they actually got married.

Jay (14:13):
I know, but I'm saying, like, do you think they got
married before having sex?
No.

Wilson (14:19):
I think listen to that podcast episode.
Okay, I have to listen to it.
Tell me that like there's notlike they don't they don't say
anything that's but it's justlike what I recall is if you
kind of listen to what they'resaying, it's like it kind of
sounds like something maybe wasthere at one point.

Captain (14:37):
I mean, they like kiss on the show.

Wilson (14:41):
Yeah, but I'm thinking it like more than that happened.

Jay (14:45):
Like Kiff Harrington and his love interest in Game of
Thrones.

Captain (14:48):
Okay, well, they're also married.

Jay (14:50):
I know, but I'm saying that's like when you play a love
interest in the show, ithappens.
Like, you gotta you go, you'rearound that person all the time,
you pretend to love thatperson, now you're going on
dates.

Wilson (15:01):
I do know they did they like kind of hated each other
for a while while they werefilming the show.

Captain (15:06):
It was post their fleeing, you're saying.

Wilson (15:09):
Yeah, I mean, I guess.

Jay (15:10):
That would also explain why they started to hate each other
because that's what happenedwith Dexter and Dev and Deborah.

Captain (15:16):
Oh, yeah, they got over it.

Wilson (15:18):
Oh, wait, um, but or I'm misremembering it that they
hated each other at first andthen they became buddies.

Captain (15:24):
I think they didn't like each other at first.

Wilson (15:25):
But I mean, that still stands to reason like they hate
each other.
Yeah.
They had a fling.
Yeah.
And they're like, alright,we're gonna bang it out.
Yeah.

Captain (15:32):
Bang it out.
It's crazy.
Um anyway, Agent Dog was reallycool.
Yeah.
He called me the X-Files girl.
He signed we took picties withhim.
And uh just stared from adistance.
We took picties with him, andum I got him to sign a picture
from X-Files, so it was reallynice.
I it was really cool.
I know it's always kind oflike, oh, is it worth paying for
that?
But it's like, wait, hold on.

(15:53):
Like, this is one of my topfavorite shows ever.
Yeah.
And this is probably gonna belike the most famous main
character from that show Iprobably could meet in any of
the estate.

Wilson (16:01):
If Jillian Anderson was there, I'd be like, Yeah, I'm
gonna pay this.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, we're gonna pay shirttoo.
You're getting in here.

Captain (16:10):
We're all in this picture.
Yeah.
But yeah, no, it was reallynice.
Still CityCon, it was fun.
They still um Parker Poseystill canceled.

Wilson (16:19):
Yeah.

Jay (16:25):
You will find you're gonna chase uh Parker Posey all over
the country.
Yeah.
At our conference, I'lleventually see her.
Yeah.

Captain (16:31):
We um we did see um England.
What's his first name?

Wilson (16:35):
Robert England.

Captain (16:36):
England oh, but it's like really you.

Wilson (16:39):
England.

Captain (16:40):
Yeah.
So Freddie, no, not Freddie.
Yeah.
No, Freddie.
Freddie Krueger.

Jay (16:45):
Is he there's a line for him.
Oh, yeah.
Huge line for him.

Captain (16:49):
We saw Shia LaBeouf from a distance.
We saw Heather Langingkamp.
Oh, yeah, Heather.

Wilson (16:55):
Heather.

Captain (16:56):
Um, and um Linda Hamilton from a distance.

Jay (17:01):
Yeah, I was about to say they had a lot of the T2 people
Lyndon Hamilton, Robert Patrick.
Um Linda Hampton looks great.

Captain (17:06):
Edward Cullen, no.
Looks like a Edward Furlong.

Jay (17:11):
Yeah, he was there.
Yeah.
Um at a T2 reunion.
We saw Ron Pearlman and KatieSegal.

Captain (17:18):
Dude, Ron Perlman is so funny.
Yeah, Ron Pearlman is so funny.
He's like a movie star in theyeah, he's like a real movie
star.
I was like kind of shocked tosee him.

Wilson (17:28):
Michael Bine was there.
I think it's how you say hisname.
Uh but like you're now an 80smovies fan.
Like, Michael Bind is what?
Um, he was in Terminator.
He was in The Abyss, Aliens.

Captain (17:40):
Oh, but these are movies I already seen.
Not like movies to add to mywatch list that he's in.

Jay (17:46):
Oh, no, but where you know why you know him from.
No.

Captain (17:49):
But I would recognize it.
You know who that is.

Jay (17:55):
He was in Poltergeist 7, remember that?

Wilson (17:57):
I think when you see his face, you'll recognize him.
I don't yeah, I didn't know hisname, like his name doesn't
bring anything to mind for me.

Jay (18:03):
No.
I mean, I just watched TheAbyss kind of recently.
Really good movie.
Yeah.
B-I-N-E or B-I-E-H-N.
James Cameron did the Abyss.
That sounds right.
The ending of that movie is sostrange.
I mean, I like the movie.
Yeah, it's also really long.
It's insanely long.
And like you think it's overabout through two or three

(18:24):
times, and it's not.
And then the very end is like,you you should have ended this
earlier because I didn't I don'tI'm not sure about this ending.
The very end of it.

Wilson (18:32):
And also like wait, who are the people almost drowned in
that movie?
Multiple people almost drowned.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, we do.
Maybe like no rats in thatmovie or something.

Captain (18:42):
Actually, the rats were okay.

Wilson (18:44):
Or they torture them or something.

Captain (18:45):
No, everybody else.
All the humans were tortured.

Jay (18:48):
Male protagonist, I can't remember his name at the moment,
refuses to even talk about themovie.
Like he doesn't even want totalk about the movie.
Oh, yeah, he won't answerquestions.
It's like PTSD.
Yeah, Ed Norris reportedlyalmost drowned multiple times.
James Cameron almost drowned.

Captain (19:05):
Yeah, it was really good though.
Okay, I have one last thing forthe intro.

Wilson (19:09):
It's a surprise because it's not even in the in the
sheet.

Captain (19:11):
Yes, I did get you a little Christmas present.
It's very tiny, but I thought Ithought Surprise on the
podcast.

Wilson (19:19):
Okay.

Captain (19:21):
We saw this in the vineyard and thought that you
would like this yoga.
It's a zipper.
Um so like it's a little bitmore secure.
And then inside there's somecat toys.
Really?
But you probably already havetoys like these.

Wilson (19:41):
Yeah, they're gonna they're gonna eat that shit up.

Captain (19:44):
Ummediate interest.
Thank you.
Um yeah.

Wilson (19:52):
You got a pocket on the inside too?

Captain (19:54):
Yeah, but like the little yoga cats.

Wilson (19:57):
Okay, okay.
This is Martha's vineyard.
Yes.
You're saying the vineyardearlier?
I was like, no one says.
I don't know what vineyardthey're talking about.

Jay (20:07):
Nobody says that.
That is way too vague.

Captain (20:10):
Literally nobody says that.

Wilson (20:11):
When did you go?

Jay (20:12):
V vineyard.

Captain (20:14):
I do say the vineyard.
Should I say Martha's?

Wilson (20:17):
Well, I mean it's your second time there now, so like
you can say that.
We're residents.
Basically residents.

Jay (20:23):
Like you need to go three.
If you go three times, then youcan affectionately.
Oh, yeah.

Captain (20:28):
You can be like, have you been to the blum blah blah?
Like, you know, you can likeit.

Wilson (20:31):
And you can say, like, when we go to the vineyard, you
know.

Captain (20:35):
Our our bi-annual trips to the vineyard.

Jay (20:39):
Um like bicentennial.

Captain (20:42):
Well, we've been twice in the last like four years.

Wilson (20:44):
The last time I think we thought about visiting it when
we went to Provincetown, butthen like I know what, you have
to get a boat, and then you alsomentioned how like ticks are
everywhere.
So I was like, maybe we don'tneed to ticks are much better
this time.

Captain (20:57):
Found no ticks this year.

Wilson (20:58):
Yeah.

Captain (20:59):
But supposedly the type of tick got way worse that it's
the meat allergy tick now.
Oh, perfect.

Jay (21:05):
So if you get bit, meat's over for the rest of your life.
For the rest of your life.
Alright, well, uh Like no, likedon't even like touch it.

Captain (21:12):
No, like red meat is fairly allergic to you.

Wilson (21:14):
Alright, well then I'll just you can just tell me about
your trips to the vineyard anduh Yeah, I'm a vegan now.

Captain (21:21):
Um but yeah, that was just a little, you know.

Jay (21:24):
I think someone actually expired from that recently.

Captain (21:27):
Expired?

Jay (21:28):
They didn't know they got bit by it, and then we're gonna
be able to do that.
That's a nice way of sayingdied.
Yeah.

Captain (21:32):
I know, but I've never I ever heard you say that.

Jay (21:34):
Sorry, they got unalived.

Captain (21:35):
You're trying to not get us flagged on by the Yeah,
we've never said died on this.
The heart went on a horrormovie podcast.

Jay (21:45):
No, because they didn't know they got bit, and then they
went to, you know, White Castleand ate a burger.

Wilson (21:49):
So I didn't realize you actually like I just thought it
was it tastes like dead, likeyou are allergic to red meat.

Captain (21:57):
Yeah, usually highly reactive, yeah.

Wilson (21:59):
But you're not reactive like to the own meat in your
body.

Captain (22:02):
No, and there's it's like something about the the
protein in red meat or somethingthat you become allergic to.

Wilson (22:08):
Okay.
Yeah, your body's protein.

Captain (22:11):
In your own body, what?

Wilson (22:12):
I don't know.
You're just allergic.
I mean, I I guess the bodyknows the difference.
If you try to eat yourself,like like my arm, you know,
would I just like die?
Is that what you're saying?

Captain (22:25):
Um, from bleeding out.

Jay (22:28):
Before you bleed out, your your your throat would swallow
up, yeah.
Yeah, allergic reaction.
Yeah, we know what we'retalking about.

Captain (22:36):
We're basically doctors.

Jay (22:39):
You would leave quite the riddle for the uh autopsy
people.
They'd be like, uh, how did hedie?

Wilson (22:46):
That would be a good CSI episode.
It really would.
Oh my god.
They're like all they have islike a bite on their arm.
Yeah.

Captain (22:53):
Oh, there's like this hint that it's zombies are
happening.

Wilson (22:55):
Well, there's just like, how did he die?
Yeah.
You know?

Captain (22:58):
This is more like house.

Wilson (22:59):
Yeah, that is a bit more.

Jay (23:03):
Yeah, no.

Captain (23:04):
It probably already has a meat tick episode, honestly.

Jay (23:06):
House has a meat tick episode?
Probably.

Captain (23:08):
It's always weird.

Jay (23:10):
A million years ago.

Captain (23:11):
Yeah, but the whole thing is that this doctor always
can tell it's this weird one intwo million chance disease.

Jay (23:17):
Were meat ticks like around whenever No, I don't think they
were.
Isn't that like a new thing?

Captain (23:22):
No, they've been in Texas for a long time.
They just made their way northrecently.

Jay (23:25):
Wait, meat love in Texas has meat ticks.

Captain (23:27):
I'm pretty sure they're mostly from Texas.
What?
I've never heard of this.
Oh my god.

Jay (23:33):
In Texas?
Deep dive into meat tick.
Welcome to the meat tickpodcast.
We're your hosts.

Captain (23:43):
I was thinking of Sandy and Sanjay.
Because you're like in ticks?
Oh, yeah.

Jay (23:50):
Can I say ticks into Esther?
Ruth caught off the rails.
But it is, it is kind of acrazy.
I I just I hadn't heard of itbefore, and I I heard recently
someone did have it.

Captain (24:04):
Oh, a nit okay.
No, no, no, no.
Um says originally in Athens,Georgia, but I'm pretty sure I'm
pretty sure most of them areTixis now.
Aren't Tixis.
Yeah, they don't call it Texasanymore.
Tixis.

Wilson (24:19):
You know, um, you put ticks or tick on the I think the
podcast list, so this would belike a good like uh There's a
movie about a tick?

Jay (24:29):
Yeah, that's where I first learned to fear ticks.
That is disgusting.
I would never they get likehuge and eat people.
That is that's horrifying.

Captain (24:38):
It's called the Lone Star Tick.
That's like uh colloquiallycolloquially.
Ugh.
Uh anyway, um, yes.
Why are we here?
Oh, Marcus.

Wilson (24:52):
Um, I think it was about David Ducovny and not like
banging bag and the vineyard andokay.

Captain (24:59):
Do we want to get in here?
Yeah, let's get in.
This is like not a bad movie.
We're like chit-chatting, likeit is a bad movie.
But it's not.

Wilson (25:07):
Spoiler.

Captain (25:08):
Like we should get in here.
Um, what are you drinking overthere?

Wilson (25:12):
Oh shit.
Are you is that empty?

Captain (25:14):
No, no, no.

Wilson (25:16):
It's empty.

Captain (25:18):
I don't know how to prove to you.

Wilson (25:19):
Um, chug it.
Just fill it on your laptop.
Just yeah, yeah.

Captain (25:24):
Um I have Blake's hard cider American berry, and it's
um they like are reallypromoting that there's nothing
in here except um apples,blueberries, and fermentation.

Jay (25:38):
Uh can ferment.
Uh and this was your secondchoice.
Yeah, you're cheating on yourblueberry boyfriend.

Captain (25:45):
Well, he he's nowhere to be found.
He was MIA.
So, you know, I gotta get somesomewhere.

Jay (25:51):
No, everything you're like, oh, you try one check, I love
this, and it just getsimmediately gone.

Captain (25:57):
Immediately gone forever.

Jay (25:58):
Like four different immediately gone forever.

Captain (26:01):
Yeah, I've gone to restaurants and been like, oh my
god, that was such an amazingmeal.

Jay (26:04):
I'm so glad they have uh three days later.

Captain (26:06):
Gone.
Gone forever.

Jay (26:08):
The meal or the restaurant?

Captain (26:10):
That that whole meal, all the ingredients, they're
like, they don't even know whatI'm talking about.
Yeah.
Yeah.

Jay (26:16):
It's kind of funny.

Captain (26:19):
It's it's a curse.
I hate it.
So blueberry boyfriend is MIA.
But you know, this is this isthis is pretty good.
It's uh blueberry settling.
It's just called Americanberry.
So, you know, they're reallytrying to take the the forefront
of the of the blueberry uhmarket, you know what I mean?
So but yeah, it's actually it'sactually pretty good.

(26:40):
I think blueberry boyfriend's alittle bit better.

Jay (26:43):
All right.
Well, Jay, what are you uh I amdrinking Helltown Brewery's uh
Buffy beer.
It's like a hazy IPA, verygood, very strong.
It's like 7% for hazy IPA.
7%?
Yeah, it's pretty strong.
But it's good.
Very good, actually.
I have um it's a very spookybrand.

Captain (27:03):
This is 8%.

Jay (27:05):
Okay.

Captain (27:12):
I think no, I think Wilson will win.
He's having a hard time.

Wilson (27:15):
Oh, I'm having uh I'm having a Kona.
Oh well, I did have oneearlier.

Captain (27:18):
I'm sorry.
That's amazing.
What happened to the I heardall the mixing.

Wilson (27:22):
Yeah, what this?
Yeah.
I drank it.
It's like a half an hour ago.

Captain (27:30):
Wow, that was half an hour.
Oh, we've been talking abouthalf an hour.

Wilson (27:35):
These are bottles.
It's a Manhattan.

Captain (27:38):
How is that Manhattan?

Wilson (27:39):
Uh it's pretty good.
I'm uh re very recently uh intoManhattan.
So the day I decided I wantedto like have Manhattan's, like
all that next weekend, like thenext seven days.
I like well, okay, not everysingle day of that week, but I
had a Manhattan anytime we wentsomewhere to go out.

Captain (27:57):
I was just like, even at the worst bars, I'll have
that Manhattan-esque you canmake it, please.

Jay (28:07):
It takes a certain kind of bravery to order Manhattan at
least.

Captain (28:11):
The first time I ever had an espresso martini, I just
ordered that straight for like,yeah, for like the week that we
were.

Jay (28:17):
We're just at a bar and I ordered a bunch of it.

Captain (28:19):
Dude, a pumpkin spice espresso martini.
Who is she?
She's me.
That was so good.
Really good.
I love that.

Jay (28:27):
I hadn't seen that on a menu anywhere before.

Captain (28:29):
Yeah, I love the fall Christmas, like, let's just
anything squash.

Wilson (28:33):
Throw it in there.
Gourz.
Gourz.
Yeah.

Captain (28:37):
Yeah.
Captain likes some gourds.

Wilson (28:39):
Would you drink like a gourd iced tea?
Or like in a heartbeat.

Captain (28:44):
We're gonna need to sell it a little bit better than
that.

Jay (28:46):
Mama needs her PSL.
Do people eat gourds?
Like, would you have like a daybasically?

Captain (28:53):
I have pumpkins, yes, I guess, but like they're not
gonna call it a gourd pie,Wilson.
It's a pumpkin pie.

Wilson (29:00):
They probably do call it in some like fancy restaurant.

Captain (29:02):
I just wonder if they're like, are they somehow
more bitter or like they justnot they're not I mean, if
you've had a raw pumpkin,there's not a lot of sugar in
there.
It's just you gotta add sugarand butter and stuff.

Wilson (29:13):
Yeah, just I don't know.
I don't really hear aboutpeople eating gourds.

Captain (29:16):
You know, you're gonna hate this.
I know you're gonna hate this,but I did once have roasted
acorn squash, and there waslike, you know, goodies, goodies
inside.
Goodies, goodies, like, youknow, treats and not not there
was food inside.
Anyway, I ate the food inside,and um, but it was like sorped
me in an acorn gourd, and I feellike that's actually

(29:36):
interesting.
I feel like you would have tobe.

Wilson (29:38):
But what is an acorn gourd?

Captain (29:39):
Acorn squash! It's like in the shape of an acorn.

Wilson (29:42):
Oh, okay.
It's not doesn't taste likeacorns.

Captain (29:45):
No.
That does remind me.
But if you roast them, you caneat the whole thing.

Wilson (29:48):
Oh but um for so around Thanksgiving, the first time I
had ever heard of something, itwas leading up to Thanksgiving,
was this like you like basicallymash, or you don't have to
mash, but sweet potatoes, andthen you like caramelize um
pecans and like put them on top.

Captain (30:05):
I'm down.

Wilson (30:06):
I had never heard about it.
Show up Thanksgiving the nextday there for the first time.
It was good.
And I usually don't like sweetpotatoes, but I just felt so
weird.
This thing, this dish I hadnever heard about, heard about
like two days beforeThanksgiving.

Captain (30:21):
What do they call the dish?

Wilson (30:23):
Pecan sweet potatoes?
I don't know.

Captain (30:29):
It sounded like it had a name, like a name that you
like saw on a list.

Wilson (30:33):
No, I just uh somebody brought it up and I was like, I
have no idea what that is.

Captain (30:38):
I have never seen that either.

Wilson (30:39):
What pecan like pecan pie?

Captain (30:41):
No.
No, but I didn't have that forthe first time, but like no,
like roasted caramelized sweetpotatoes with roasted with
pecans on top.

Wilson (30:51):
Uh yeah, or it's like caramelized, yeah.
It was like it was like someform of like semi-mushy sweet
potatoes and then a layer oflike candied pecans or
something.

Captain (31:01):
Sounds good.

Wilson (31:03):
Yeah, it was yeah.
I mean it's a I I'm trying tothink of what a name would be,
but it's just like sweet potatopecan casserole.
I don't know.

Captain (31:14):
It's some type of salad.
Yeah, yeah.
Um, well, that's fun.

Wilson (31:22):
Okay, well, that's the drinks.

Captain (31:24):
Um 40 minutes into it.
Okay, um welcome.
Welcome to the 183rd episode ofthe Red Run Podcast, where we
review horror movies whileenjoying an adult beverage or
two.
And I'm Captain.

Wilson (31:41):
And I'm Wilson.

Captain (31:42):
And this week we're reviewing the 2023 Norwegian
comedy horror film, There'sSomething in the Bar.

Wilson (31:50):
Alright, I didn't know we had uh William Chatner on the
podcast.
Shat is back, baby.

Captain (31:56):
Shatter's back.
I'm the worst impression.
Like it.
Yeah.

Wilson (32:00):
Um I mean, hashtag you're not trying to be William
Shatner, because that soundedlike William Chatner.

Captain (32:04):
I mean, it sounded just like him.

Wilson (32:06):
I mean, it's gotta be shadow.
She was in the room, but yousaid he's shattered.
I said hashtag you gotta beshat me.

Jay (32:12):
You gotta be shat me.

Captain (32:14):
Um that's a good one for like if William Shatner does
come to like one of the cons.
I think he's gonna.

Jay (32:20):
You think William Shatner wants to hear a chat?

Captain (32:22):
Our friend Willie.

Jay (32:23):
Like you think that he's up for that.
Like I'm gonna be the millionthperson to say hey.

Captain (32:28):
If you lean into it, I think it'd be fine.

Wilson (32:31):
I think he I heard he avoided conventions for the
longest time.
Then he went and is like,woo-hoo, these are fun.

Captain (32:37):
I mean, I feel like it happens to a lot of celebrities.
Um okay.

Jay (32:43):
Oh, yeah.

Captain (32:44):
Okay.
There's something in the vine,directed by Magnus Martins, uh,
written by Alexander KirkwoodBrown.
Um, neither of these people areclickable, like, with their own
wiki, but Magnus did um directtwo episodes of Fear of the
Walking Dead, never watchedthat, and two episodes of

(33:05):
Banshee.

Wilson (33:06):
What is Banshee?

Captain (33:07):
Banshee is a You were like ready to answer that, too.

Wilson (33:12):
I knew you were gonna ask.

Captain (33:13):
Banshee is an American crime thriller television series
um that um is a recentlyparoled thief.
Um assumes the identity of asheriff in a town called Banshee
PA in Pennsylvania.
There is no real Banshee,Pennsylvania.
Um but um yeah, add this to Q.

Wilson (33:32):
This sounds kind of interesting.

Captain (33:33):
It has four seasons, so uh probably what network is
this?

Wilson (33:36):
Like a Tubi?

Captain (33:40):
Um HBO Max says that's where you can Yeah, HBO Max.

Jay (33:44):
Wow, what?

Captain (33:45):
Yeah.
Um I'm watching that.
Yeah, it actually sounds prettygood.
I've never seen it though.

Jay (33:49):
Um gives me sneaky pee vibes.

Captain (33:52):
Seriously.
And he he directed two episodesof that.

Jay (33:55):
Okay.

Captain (33:56):
Um okay, so just a quick um so like yeah, there's a
a f American family that iscoming to Norway is kind of our
premise here.
So um the American family'smain character is Martin Starr
as Bill.
Um he also oh, he also playedBill in Freaks and Great Geeks.
A different Bill.
A different Bill, not like thesame.

(34:17):
Could be mad, but it looks likebeing the same name.
Um and then he also was inParty Down.
Um he was Gilfoyle in SiliconValley.
Um he was in Knocked Up andAdventureland, and he also is
Roger Harrington in the MarvelUniverse.

Jay (34:36):
I don't know.
I think it's Spider-Manteacher, I think.
Oh, yeah.
You would recognize Martin.
Yeah, he's in two of them atleast.
Oh yeah.

Captain (34:45):
Um, don't click on anything.
Um, so then we have Carol whoplayed oh no.
Uh his wife Carol, who's playedby Amrita Archie?
Um, she was eerie in Game ofThrones, which is a really small

(35:05):
character, but I kind ofrecognized her.
Um and then she's also um somein some movie called or some
character in um The Ser SerpentQueen.
I don't know, something newerthat she did.
Um I don't think the littlekids did anything.
Do you want to give me air?

(35:25):
I think I can close it all theway.
Um okay, and then we also havethe main elf who is played by
Kieran Shaw.
Um he is a little person thatgets credit, you know, does a
lot of roles.
So he was in he was a goblin inThe Philosopher's Stone.
Um, he was um a scale doublefor Elijah Woods in Lord of the

(35:48):
Rings, which is so funny.
Um, and then he also was acharacter in the Chronicles of
Narnia, um, and he's a goblin inThe Hobbit.
You watched all those movies.

Wilson (35:59):
Yes.

Captain (36:00):
Do you recognize him?

Wilson (36:01):
I do not.
He's probably in like copiousamount of it.
Yeah, yeah.

Captain (36:07):
Um and then we have uh Jepp Beck Larson, who plays
Raymond in this movie, so he'swhat a neighbor.
Um he's most famous for hisrole in The Last Kingdom, which
you watched.

Jay (36:20):
I did, yeah.

Captain (36:21):
I don't recognize him at all.

Jay (36:22):
Oh yeah, he's he's a he's a big character in The Last
Kingdom.
He's one of the main likeantagonists slash Oh, bad guy?
Protagonist?
He's yeah, he plays a badcharacter.
He plays like a shadycharacter.
He's not like a uh he's he'skind of evil, but more of a
trickster or you know,untrustworthy character more
than anything.
He's not like a super evilperson.

Captain (36:46):
Um and then we have one other neighbor, Kale Helvang
Larsen.
He is Norwegian, so I'mbutchering his name.
Um, but he's a comedianactually.
He's best known for his work uhwith Elvis as part of some
comedian trio.
Who is this?

Wilson (37:03):
What do you what do you play in this movie?

Captain (37:05):
He's the main nor a neighbor, the the guy that gives
all of the discussion aboutJeppe.

Jay (37:12):
That's a different neighbor.
Jeppe's one of theparticipants.

Captain (37:15):
That who plays it plays Hannah.

Jay (37:18):
Oh, okay, okay, okay.

Captain (37:19):
Um and then, yes, he's he yeah, so this guy, Kale, he's
a comedian who's in a comedytrio called Roskman, which means
fast.
I think it the translation ismore like quick, like you're you
know, you're like, you know,you can be quick with your not
like literally fast.

Jay (37:37):
It's like quick witted.

Captain (37:39):
Yeah, it's quick witted, I think.
I think um and then you know,he does some other like comedy
shows, um, like comedy TV shows.
Like he's got one where youlike there's no laughing, like
the silent library type of show,but nor we Norway.

Wilson (37:55):
What do you mean silent library?

Captain (37:56):
You know that I think there was an M T V show where
like you had to like do pranksor like do dares, but like you
couldn't laugh at all.
If you laughed, you're out.

Wilson (38:06):
I don't know anything about that.

Captain (38:07):
Well, anyway, there's a Norwegian version of that.
Okay.
Okay.
So the series starts out withum a man having a full crash out
trying to burn a barn to theground.
Um he gets burnt alive instead.
That's all we really seethough.

Wilson (38:27):
Well, yeah, you see a figure.
Oh, you do see a figure?
I think you see Yeah.
Actually, I think you do.
That or like eyes.
Yeah.
Because he like pushes thatweird tire swing or something
and like knocks him out thewindow.

Captain (38:41):
Yeah, and then he burns alive.
Yeah.
Um, and then a year later, yousee an American family driving
um through Norway, and they'retalking about how they are what?

Jay (38:51):
I just thought of something.
He burned alive, but there'ssnow everywhere.
Why didn't he just get on theground and roll around?

Captain (38:56):
Well, I think he's covered in gasoline or
something.

Jay (38:59):
Yeah, but the snow will help.
I I don't know why I justthought about that now.
He falls down, he falls on theground, he's burning alive.

Captain (39:06):
Yeah, but if water makes grease fires worse, why
why would snow make But it'spowdered snow, it should smother
the fire.

Jay (39:12):
I mean, I don't want to get off on tangent, but I just
thought about that.
I was like, hey, probably couldhave probably could have made
it out.

Captain (39:18):
I mean, he wasn't.

Jay (39:19):
If he just wasn't panicking from being on fire.
Well, yeah.

Captain (39:23):
Um yeah, this is like such a tangent.
Um, you should not use snow ona grease fire.
It'll melt into water and makeit worse.

Jay (39:30):
Yeah, but it's not fire.

Captain (39:32):
Yeah, but gasoline is gasoline oil slash grease, like
is that not the same basis basicproperties?

Wilson (39:38):
Uh you know what?
We're going into territory.
I have no idea what I'm talkingabout.

Captain (39:41):
So I'm not gonna answer that.

Jay (39:43):
Yeah, no, snow won't effectively help extinguish a
gas.

Captain (39:46):
So he died.

Jay (39:47):
So he died.

Captain (39:47):
And the logistics of the movie make sense.

Jay (39:49):
Correct.
I stand corrected.
Pour one out for old Smeehmall.

Captain (39:55):
Um yeah, Jay, so you would die in this situation.

Jay (39:58):
Well, I would die.
I tried.
I mean my good thing.

Wilson (40:00):
Oh yeah, like what's the in this situation, what's the
alternative?
Yeah, like you know nothing.
Nothing.

Captain (40:07):
Um.
Okay, so anyway, the familycomes through.

Jay (40:11):
Um pull up, come through.
Free house yellow.

Captain (40:17):
Yeah, and we find out that they're um they inherited
some great grandfather's oruncle's house or something in
Norway um that died.
It was the guy in thebeginning.

Wilson (40:27):
Um they do not seem like a family.
They seem like no um relatives,maybe.
Like he is not a father figure.
That is not a motherly figure.

Captain (40:36):
There are fathers that are just as horrible as a father
as that man.
He is biologically their fault,but he is not a very absent.
Yeah.
Um, yeah.
Talk about like, yeah, nothing.
No parenting.
Um, anyway, yes, they drivethrough, they see a moose, they
try to pet the moose, which iscrazy.
Um and then we find out thatthe mom is like some health help

(41:00):
uh self-help.

Wilson (41:02):
She's definitely like an MLM, right?

Captain (41:05):
Um, yeah, and um she wants to turn, they get to the
house, no, she there's a barn,tries to turn the barn into a
bed and breakfast.
Um but like very shortly afterthey've been there, Lucas starts
to see, like he sees there'ssomething in the barn and he
even says, There's something inthe barn.
Um and he's scared about it.
But um again, then they alsohave a teenage daughter, Nora,

(41:30):
who's like, you know, a typicalangsty teenager.
Um Carol, the stepmom tries tokeep the family together, and
Bill, very naive, is trying tolike make the home a home.
Um anyway, they go into townand Lucas talks to some
neighbor.
What's his name?

(41:50):
Kale?
I don't know what his name isin the movie, but he gives him
the rundown about um what theelf is, that he's an elf barn.
No, he gives behind elves.

Wilson (42:01):
Yeah, but like he doesn't believe that there are
really elves.

Captain (42:04):
He's a yeah, well, that's funny.
Lucas asks him, are they real?
And he goes, What do you mean?
Like, are the statues real?
Is the lore a thing?
Like, is that a thing?
Or anyway, yeah, he says, Yes,they're a barn elf.
Um, and like they're cool ifyou're nice to them, but they
will um like attack you or makeyou move out of the house if you

(42:24):
are bad to them.

Wilson (42:25):
You have three I think he said he gave him three rules.

Captain (42:27):
Yeah, no lights, no loud noises, and don't change
anything.
Which is like well.
Um and then Lucas tries tobefriend him, so he gives him
like chuck a chip cookies.
He loves that.
Um and then I think becausehe's nice to the barn elf, the

(42:48):
barn elf starts doing stuff forthem.
So he like shovels theirdriveway, he chops their wood
for them.
Nobody understands what'shappening.
Like the parents are just okay,it's happening for us.
Um yeah, I don't even know howyou would just assume that
that's happening and it's fineand it's taxes.

Jay (43:07):
But I guess they're uh new countries, so they're like Yeah,
I mean they don't know what'syou know what's going on.
I mean uh it could be part ofthe service.

Captain (43:16):
It could be.

Jay (43:17):
But when did you see somebody or I tell you what
you're not gonna assume it is afreaking barn elf.
That's the last thing I'massuming.

Captain (43:23):
I mean, he says it's the barn.
Yeah, and they, you know,they're just like they don't
believe him.
Yeah, he's just a little kid.
They're like, whatever.

Wilson (43:29):
So the dad what puts up a bunch of lights, the brightest
light.
Very loud.

Captain (43:34):
They set up for yeah, they they decide to like uh try
to befriend everybody in theneighborhood, so they like set
up a party for a party.

Jay (43:41):
The barn.

Captain (43:42):
The barn's disgusting.
I don't know how they got thattogether enough.

Jay (43:45):
It still looks yeah, it's pretty the barn still looks kind
of nasty during the party.

Captain (43:49):
They just like pushed everything to the sides.

Jay (43:51):
Yeah, yeah.
And the house is gorgeous andhuge, but they're like not
really a barn with a bunch ofholes in it, no insulation.

Captain (43:57):
It's like there's chains, barrels, like tarps and
stuff in the barn.
They just push to the side.

Jay (44:02):
It looks like an old sawmill.
Yeah, yeah.
Like, time for a party.

Captain (44:06):
Yeah, but in the setup for that, they put up the
brightest decorate Christmasdecorations, the loudest
animatronic decorations.
Um, and of course, the barn elfdoesn't like that, so he
destroys all the decorationsovernight.
Um, we do meet the cop at thevery beginning when the moose
comes through, and she basicallysaves them from getting
attacked by a big mom moose, butum she comes through again when

(44:29):
the decorations get destroyed.
Her character is fantastic, sofunny, like punchy with her
lines.
I didn't pull her up for cast,but you said you recognized her
or no?
Oh.
I don't recognize it.
Um but yeah, she's a reallygood, like, she has a lot of
really good lines.
She does, yeah.

Wilson (44:48):
She's a fun character.

Captain (44:49):
Yeah, she's a really fun character.
But basically, like they tellher it's to short overnight, and
they're like, what are yougonna do about it?
And she basically just laughsat their face, laughs in their
face, and she's when they askedher, What are they gonna do?
And you know, she's like uh Icould look into it.

Jay (45:06):
I'm gonna get food down here.

Wilson (45:08):
Yeah, yeah, she makes that joke.
Yeah, I mean it does soundridiculous, like based on what
she like they're describing toher.
Like, yeah.
I'm gonna call for backup.

Jay (45:15):
These are the things.
Well, dust for fingerprints,yeah.
Yeah.

Captain (45:21):
Um, yes, and then they do eventually have the dinner.
Um, I Martin gives a verypoorly translated Norwegian
speech because he's trying tolearn Norwegian.
Um, and they're like, Wait, thefuck?
Um but anyway, party picks upwhen they all have alcohol.
Mom, set mom hears from one ofthe neighbors the rumors that
this barn is apparently haunted,which she didn't know anything

(45:44):
about.
Um, so she hears that likethere's some weird history of
the being haunted and the uncledied on the property or
whatever.
Um, and she wasn't really fullyaware of that.
Um, but the party kind of comescrashing to an end when Nora,
the teenager, drank everythingand then or drank, you know, and
then threw up everywhere.
Um including um it seepingthrough the floor billards onto

(46:08):
the barn elf, which isdisgusting.

Jay (46:10):
It's disgusting.

Captain (46:12):
Um during this party, I think the neighbor tells Lucas,
okay, there's like one lastthing you can do for the barn
elf so that he won't destroyyour family, which is make him
some porridge.
On Christmas Eve.
Oh yes, sorry, on ChristmasEve.
Um and maybe that'll maybethat'll make things cool.
Um but that doesn't work outvery well.

Wilson (46:34):
Um because the dad basically eats he eats all the
porridge.

Captain (46:39):
Yeah.
Um dad eats all the porridge,so there's no porridge to give
him.
And then the dad made them lootfish on Christmas Eve, which is
like a disgusting jello fish,fermented gelatinous fish that
is a Norwegian uh traditionaldish.
Um, and so Lucas has nothing tooffer the elf except that fish,

(47:00):
which uh he takes a bite andthen like basically his eyes go
black and he's like time torampage.
Like they don't they can'tspeak English, but they like you
can just tell that he's like,Oh, that's how you feel about
me.

Jay (47:14):
You'd think um if it's a traditional Norwegian dish, the
elf wouldn't mind it so much,but you have gelatinous
fermented fish, and you tell mewhat you tell me what you think
about that.
But yeah, it didn't lookappetizing.

Captain (47:29):
No.
Um so yeah, I think this iswhen everything the rest of the
movie is like a very long attackbattle scene, basically.

Wilson (47:37):
Oh yeah, because he summons all of the elves in the
area.
Yeah.

Captain (47:40):
Yeah, he attacks them and then yeah, he summons elves
for more for more help.

Wilson (47:45):
And then they what?
Basically break into the house,the family retreats upstairs,
and then all the elves get drunkin their house and just party
for a while.

Captain (47:55):
I mean, alcohol's always gonna make it better.

Wilson (47:57):
And then like some of them accidentally kill
themselves, like figuring outwhat guns are.

Captain (48:01):
Yeah, the cop eventually shows up again when
the family the family kind ofyou know gets in and out of
this, you know.
Nora has a softball, she's asoftball pro or whatever, so
like she's you know, whackingthem and stuff, but they do
eventually get the cop to comeback out, and she doesn't
believe them.
Um you know, she's like, youcrazy Americans.
Um, because they're like, getyour gun.
She's like, we don't carry ourguns around us, like you crazy

(48:23):
Americans.
Um, but you know, that doesn'twork out really well because
they steal her snowmobile andher gun.
And run her over.
And run her over.
Um and yes, then they kill eachother with the gun, not
realizing how that works.
But yes, the family eventuallybarricades themselves upstairs
and and while have that have theelves partying.
Um they kind of like you know,the family's kind of

(48:47):
discombobulated, like movinghere, but they like bond again.

Wilson (48:51):
Yeah, they have some like hard-to-heart moments, like
bring the story together.

Captain (48:55):
Um, and then they kind of work together to get out of
this situation.
So Bill and Lucas get they'reon like this long chase scene um
towards a neighbor's house,while Carol and Nora are like
making it's almost like Molotovcocktails.

Wilson (49:15):
Yeah.

Captain (49:16):
Um, to defend themselves.
But it doesn't really itdoesn't really kill any of them.

Jay (49:22):
It doesn't do anything, really.
No, but they they pour uh whatis it, absent the moonshine or
shine into decorative treatmentornaments.
Somehow they have fuses onthem.
I don't know where they gotthose, but oh yeah.

Captain (49:40):
Um anyway, Bill and Lucas do eventually find the
neighbor that knows about elvesthat gave him the three rolls um
and asks him to help come savehim.
So he comes through.
Again, everybody that they talkto about the elves are
attacking us, like nobodybelieves them.
Yeah, even the Norwegians thathave lived here.
So I was kind of thinking thatone of the neighbors would be in
on it.

(50:00):
Like they said that they havethe rumors of it being haunted,
but I thought like somebody inthe neighborhood actually would
like fully understand, like havehave already seen them, maybe
working with them.
Um, but this movie is way moreof a comedy than like a you
know, a twist, you know.
Yeah.
I'm always looking for a twist.
Um but yes, they do bring theneighbor in.
Um, he doesn't really helpmuch.

(50:22):
Um but he does get them back tothe area where they can save
Nora and Carol that are liketied up by the elves.
And um, because Lucas madefriends with the Barn Elf before
the loot fish situation, hedecides to help the family and
fight with them against theother elves.
Even though he called all theother elves.

(50:43):
I know.

Jay (50:44):
But now he's not angry anymore.
He doesn't think that's a goodidea.

Wilson (50:46):
Yeah, like the kid showed him like a little bit of
kindness, did that we were like,I promise, but I thank you, or
I'm not sure.
It was like because the kidsaid, I promise we'll keep you
safe or like keep you happy inthe beginning, but it was like
you did everything to make himunhappy.
So what is your promise?

Captain (50:59):
Yeah, I mean, yes, he he got like yeah, all the party
noise, all the lights.

Wilson (51:04):
Um I did give him cookies though, so yeah, like
four cookies and then loot fish,like this elf basically helps
sacrifice the rest of the elvesbecause of the cookies.

Captain (51:18):
Yes.
How do they how do the rest ofthe elves go?

Wilson (51:23):
Oh yes, something some flammable things in the barn.

Captain (51:27):
Yes.
I think uh one of the barrelsgets knocked over during the
fight scene and and like oilstarts leaking out.
They show it briefly, but thenit comes up at the very end of
the movie like 30 minutes later,and it's a good tie out.
At the beginning of the movie,the guy was just like, I'm gonna
burn this ground, this barn tothe ground, you know, because
it's evil and he doesn't get todo it.
And now at the end of themovie, they do finally get to

(51:48):
burn the barn to the ground.
So it's a good bookend forthat.
Um but at the last scene,they're like, Well, the neighbor
goes, Well, your original barnAlice, he lost his home.
Like now he's homeless.

Wilson (52:05):
He's like their friend now, and he just like looks
really sad and he doesn't have ahome anymore.

Captain (52:10):
Um, so they decide to give him a home.
He gets to live inside of thelittle fake um museum in town.
Yeah, like Santa Museum or oldtimey house museum.
What?

Wilson (52:21):
Well, yeah, it's just like a silly, like like Santa's.
I don't know.

Captain (52:25):
Nice land, I think, literally translates to Santa
land.

Wilson (52:28):
Yeah, but it's just funny.

Captain (52:31):
But yes, he gets to yes, he actually becomes like
friends with them.
Oh, and they get to finallySantaurora at the end of the
movie, because it is Norwayafter all.
Um so it does end with a happyending.
And this movie is a comedy, solike it actually they actually
do hit the comedy very well.
And the horror, like, there'senough horror and comedy in
here.
There's a little too muchfighting for my liking, like, to

(52:53):
give this like amazing ratings.
Because there's like I mean,isn't the fighting the battling
scene like that?

Wilson (53:00):
I think they're fun.
Yeah, I like it.

Jay (53:02):
So you dropped your rating.
Like the fight scene.

Captain (53:05):
Because it just goes on so long.

Jay (53:06):
I think it's very Christmassy, it's giving me like
home alone vibes, basically,where they're like trying to
defend their home from the It ishome alone vibes for sure.

Captain (53:13):
Um, but a little bit more hard because the elves are
like, you know, creepy anddeadly and they do do some
sneaky stuff that like you know,you see the you know, that like
camera angle where like a dark,like a shadowed figure of the
thing, like the elf, forexample, is like goes across the
camera screen, um, you know, inthe foreground, while in the

(53:34):
background there's like youknow, Babil doing something in
the kitchen.
So like you get those scenes umor like his reflection showing
in the glass of the fridge withNora um was such a bitch was she
drops a glass, shatters it, andthen just walks away.
Cleans up nothing.

Wilson (53:53):
Typical teenager.

Captain (53:54):
That is not I'd be screamed at if I shattered a
glass and just left it there forpeople to step on.

Wilson (54:01):
Um that's some like six seven behavior right there.
Oh six seven.
Ugh.
Don't do that.

Captain (54:09):
What how old do you think you are?

Wilson (54:12):
Cut that part out.

Captain (54:14):
Um but yeah, it it's actually a pretty good movie
overall, though.
It's like it's funny, it hits,it's got your Christmas in
there.
Let's take a commercial breakand we'll be right back because
I've none of those hakus.

Wilson (54:26):
Well, ho ho, hold on now, folks.
If you're looking for a OllieJolly prank that'll keep your
Mima clutching her nativityscene, you best jinggle on over
to Uncle Ezekiel's hauntedall-day yard sale in Spirit
Emporium.
That's right! Ezekiel's takinga Christmas cheer, took it real

(54:48):
hard, and whatever fell out iswhat we're selling.
We got ornaments that glow evenwhen the tree ain't flowing.
Greeks that whispered turnaround in the middle of the
night, and stock is that well,they move.
On the road, real determinedblack.
And don't you worry, we stillgot picture frames with that

(55:12):
mystery man in the background.
Except now he's wearing alittle sand hat.
And if you see Uncle Ezekielwandering around muttering that
the North Pole portal openedagain, just let him play.
He gets like that when he mixeseggnog with his blood pressure
medicine.
So pitch up your slate, grabyour bravest cousin, and come on

(55:35):
down to Uncle Ezekiel's, wherethe candy canes are cooked, the
elves are questionable, andevery purchase comes for free
and watch.
Okay, and we're back.
Wow, what a great sponsor.

Jay (55:51):
I've been there after this podcast.
What?
I've been there after thispodcast.
Oh, yeah, and right there.

Captain (55:58):
Um okay, so subnoms hot goos.
Um, okay, we have a $1.3million box office.
Didn't really find a budget forthis.
Um it's really hard to, I don'tknow.
It's Norwegian and like there'snumbers weren't really out
there.

Jay (56:13):
Okay.

Captain (56:13):
Um, but ratings.
Um, this is an 81% critics anda 51% audience.
So 81% critics is really good.

Wilson (56:21):
That's kind of surprising.
I mean, it was good.
Let me see.

Captain (56:25):
I'm surprised the audience is 51%.

Wilson (56:27):
Yeah.
You thought it'd be higher?
I thought it'd be higher.
So not terribly hard.

Captain (56:35):
Right, right on the mark with uh with Rotten
Tomatoes, but Letterboxd isusually a little harsher than
Rotten Tomatoes, no?

Wilson (56:42):
Uh yeah, yeah, Letterbox is usually harsher.

Jay (56:44):
So Rotten Tomatoes is typically the kindest.

Captain (56:47):
The kind oh, like versus IMBD.

Jay (56:50):
IMDB, Letterboxd.

Wilson (56:52):
I feel like IMDB gives everything like 8.6.

Jay (56:55):
Yeah, I IMDB is really harsh.
And also like reallyparticular.
Like some movies that I thinkare like great, they're like,
because they're not likeChristopher Nolan Batman movies.
People are like, oh, it's likea seven.

Captain (57:07):
Um I've uh I'm just gonna rate mine right now.

Wilson (57:10):
What are you rating it?

Captain (57:12):
Okay, I gave it a 3.5.

Wilson (57:14):
I give it a three and a half.
Or sorry, no, I gave it athree.
You're gonna say a three and ahalf.

Captain (57:21):
Um yeah, I don't know.
It's just it's a funny movie.
It has the heart in there.
I laughed a lot during thismovie.

Wilson (57:29):
Yeah, I mean, okay, it I mean it doesn't have like the
best heart, but it has likeenough to keep the movie going.

Captain (57:34):
Yeah, to keep the movie going.

Wilson (57:35):
Because there was like no there wasn't really like a
familial family chemistry.
No.
I still don't believe any ofthem are family members.
No.
But uh it was a good movie.

Captain (57:44):
Out of all the one out of all the characters that
actually like try to givefamily, it's actually the
stepmom.

Wilson (57:49):
Yes.
I found her really annoying.

Captain (57:52):
Oh, like when she enters the one town restaurant
and she goes, hi everybody.

Wilson (57:56):
Yeah, I just I felt like I d I just felt all of her like
scenes were it feltinauthentic.
I don't know.

Captain (58:05):
But um, yeah, but I think her trying to bond with
her stepdaughter was likeauthentic enough.

Wilson (58:10):
Yeah, it's better than like the dad that didn't do
anything.
Oh my god.
Do you know you have kids?

Captain (58:15):
Like he doesn't, he's the worst listener.
He doesn't parent up with it.

Wilson (58:18):
Oh, I eat your porridge, sorry or I'll eat the bowl
here.
No, sorry.

Captain (58:22):
Thanks for the porridge.
Um yeah, he just doesn't, he'sjust like not, he's nothing.
Yeah.

Jay (58:29):
Yeah, completely uninterested.

Captain (58:30):
And then like Even when his wife like yells at him
about how she was so upset thatshe found about found out about
the rumors of this house, andhe's like, Oh yeah, I just
didn't want to tell you.
Yeah.
And then tells her, like, yeah,so like he died in the house,
and he caught him like he likeuh fell out of the second story
and like caught himself on fire,and she was like so mad that he
knew all of this stuff aboutthat and the rumors and like

(58:52):
just didn't tell her.

Wilson (58:52):
Yeah.
I wonder, like that him, likethe dad character being kind of
absent doesn't change anythingabout the story.
So I wonder if like MartinStarr, like he's never really
maybe has never really playedlike a very connected father
character.
I've never seen him play that.
I just play what I know.

Captain (59:10):
Yeah, I mean his at least his character is like it's
gonna sound bad, but it's likeactually a flushed out
character.
It's like, oh, I know who thisis an absent, terrible dad.

Jay (59:22):
Like they don't play off that a lot though.
Like it's not like his childrendon't really resent him in the
way you think they're gonna be.
Oh no, they're fine.
Yeah, they're just like, ohwhatever, it's all stepmom's
fault.
It's like what?
Like he's just moved youhalfway across the world and
didn't even care about what wasgoing on in your life.
Yeah.
But they they I mean it's ashort movie, so I mean there's
not a lot of and it's not thereto explore that kind of stuff.

(59:43):
So I guess not really.
It's more of a comedy.

Wilson (59:46):
Yeah, I'm kinda glad they didn't explore Yeah, no, a
hundred percent, but it's Yeah,like I guess I'm yeah, I don't
know what I'm advocating forbecause like it would have taken
more, but at the same time themovie does not need like it's
supposed to be a little kind oflike you know, can't Be a little
like yeah, like we're not therefor the family stuff.

Jay (01:00:02):
Yeah, definitely.
Like the worst parts of HomeAlone are like he's going on
like some journey ofself-discovery in the first
movie, and he's like goes tochurch and talks to homeless
person.
It's like I I just want to seeyou beat up robbers.
Skip to that part.
So it this movie kind of givesyou what you're looking for.

Wilson (01:00:16):
Yes.

Jay (01:00:17):
Um, but enough story to give you like Christmas charm
too.
Because it's like it's it'svery Christmas, yeah.
Very like very Christmas trope.
Like uh art.
It reminds me of like Meet theParents.
Is that what it is?
Family trap, parent trap?
Where the twin sisters meet atthe parent trap.
Right, and the the stepmom'strying to win over the candy.
It's kind of like that, but soI get the um yeah, I don't know.

Captain (01:00:43):
I I there's a couple moments I picked out as like
really good moments of thismovie, but I don't know if
anyone else had a specific ragthey wanted to talk about.
Um I do have a little bit ofhot ghosts.

Wilson (01:00:52):
Usually my rags, or like my rags, I think, are any of
the jokes that are like we'renot in America.
Like the Yeah, there's so manyof those I really like Detroit
line, like all of those, yeah.
I think the Detroit line wasgonna be my.

Captain (01:01:08):
Um okay.
So that Cal neighbor talksabout discussing peace and
negotiating.
He's like, you know, in Norway,here in Norway, we we we
negotiate peace, and he bringsup the fact that he Norway just
did peace talks between Israeland Palestine, yeah.
Yeah, but he was like, Well, itdidn't last very long, but we
did it and it worked briefly.

(01:01:29):
Um but he's like um he'stalking about how they have to
negotiate peace between thehumans and the elves, and Bill's
like, what the fuck are youtalking about?
Like, what side are you on likepeople like literally people
died?
And he was like, Well, it'simportant to understand both
sides are negotiating, andBill's like, No, you know, it's
either it's either, or he says,like, you know, we have to kill

(01:01:51):
him or something, and theneighbor goes, goes uh Bill, we
don't like shoot and kill eachother here until no one's left.
This isn't Detroit.
It was like very out of pocket,or like I was just not
expecting I also like one of oneof my favorite scenes is when
the um cop comes to the houseand they're like um they say

(01:02:13):
something about how like yeah,they're being attacked by elves,
and um she basically justlaughs at them and then she um
she says, Well, maybe there wasa fox.
You guys have Fox News, right?
Um but yeah, she basically justbelieves just assumes that
they're drunk, uh, they're notsober.
Um I I don't know, did you havea raise of glass, Jay?

Jay (01:02:38):
Yeah, I mean those moments are really funny where they're
um they're like drawing on thedifference between Norway and
US.
I I don't try to think ofanother one.
There's a lot there's a there'sa lot of decent moments in the
in a lot of funny moments in theshow.
I think I think one of thebetter moments is when the
daughter, I mean the dad'scompletely helpless when the the

(01:02:59):
uh elves are attacking thehouse, but the daughter like is
struggling and she gets awayfrom the elves long enough and
she gets like a bat and justyeah.
That was a nice scene, but itnever like it didn't it didn't
like do anything long term oryeah, like they weren't dead and
then she didn't keep the bat,so I was like, well, why like
this is clearly effective.

Captain (01:03:17):
Why aren't you just keep doing like but um Martin
Star his his character Bill hasanother good line about Nori vs.
America while towards the endof the movie, while they're
fleeing from the elves and theelves have stolen the sheriff's
gun, you can hear him screaming,why do they have the only gun
in Norway?

Wilson (01:03:34):
That was good too, yeah.
So there's some good one-linersin there.

Captain (01:03:38):
Yes, it they they are they really are.
Um we we were like fullylaughing.
Um okay, so this premiered atFantastic Fest, an animal film
festival in Austin, Texas.

Wilson (01:03:51):
An animal or annual?

Captain (01:03:53):
Annual.
So I was like, what?
Fine.
Uh I mean it could be.
Well, it was in Texas, sobasically animal.
Um an annual film festival inAustin, Texas, focused on
fantasy, horror, and sci-fi.
Let's go.
Um, I don't want to go toTexas, though.
Um apparently, due to limitedsnowfall during the time of

(01:04:15):
filming, Starr said that thesnow had to be brought in by
truckload to accomplish thevision that vision that they
needed for the film.
Wow.
Um oh yeah.
And then remember when um Caroluses a um lamb leg to beat one
of the elves?
Yeah.
Apparently that is atraditional Norwegian cured lamb
leg Finalar, usually served onfestive occasions.

(01:04:37):
So it was a Christmas Christmaslamb.
Yes.
A Norwegian Christmas lamb.
Um yeah, that's kind of all myhot goose.
Was this actually filmed inNorway?

Wilson (01:04:50):
Yes, it was.
I was just looking at that.
Oh.
Um Norway.

Captain (01:04:59):
It looks like Norway from someone that's been.

Jay (01:05:04):
Certificate of authenticity.

Captain (01:05:06):
Certification of authenticity.
Um I did look up if this barnelf is real, so like it's it's
um the the folklore is real, notthe actual.

Wilson (01:05:15):
Yeah, right.
The barn elf.

Captain (01:05:17):
Um it's called a fjornisen, um, which literally
translates to like barn pixie orbarn weasel or something.
But like together it would belike a barn elf.
Um, but it's like aScandinavian folklore creature
um that's often described as ashort man, quote, no bigger than
a horse's head.

Jay (01:05:38):
Okay.

Captain (01:05:39):
That wears knickerbockers and a red.
Um but yes, they live in a barnand they're typically shy,
hardly ever seen, and they'regood helpers if you treat them
well, especially at Christmas.
Um, but yes, if you do stuffthat fail keeping him happy,
then they will go they will domischief and harm you.
Um so and the porridge thing isreal.

(01:06:02):
Um there's a story that tellsof a Nisa that um finding a
farmer failed to put a speck ofbutter in his porridge, he got
angry and killed the farmer'sbest milking cow.
So that's where that originalporridge story comes from.
Um you you put the bowl ofporridge, um, you know, you give

(01:06:23):
it to him, um, you know, theywon't do as much mischief.
When we were in Norway, there'sa lot of stories about the
trolls.
I don't know if we heard toomuch about the elves.
There are elves, like they dohave elf folklore, and like all
those creepy elf figurines,those are really in Norway and
used like as Christmas decor.

(01:06:45):
Um and they yeah, they'rereally into folklore there, like
creature folklore.
So um we went to the trollmuseum.

Jay (01:06:54):
Yes.

Captain (01:06:54):
Um, but yeah, that that that's that I feel like that
fully checks out for somethingthat they would have.

Wilson (01:07:00):
Yeah.
It's an authentic movie.

Captain (01:07:03):
I've never had porridge.
Is it good?

Wilson (01:07:05):
I just always thought it was um oatmeal, but I guess
it's not.
I heard like rice and corn.
Yeah, he and butter.

Captain (01:07:12):
Dude, he whipped that up.

Jay (01:07:13):
Yeah, he looked kind of garlic and chives.

Wilson (01:07:15):
I was like, Michelin porridge.
Like, I'll try some porridge.
Like, what is that?
Um fucking uh Goldilocks.
Biggie.
Like she knows what's up.

Captain (01:07:28):
Well, one of them was just right.

Wilson (01:07:30):
Well, yeah.
Oh, I mean, she knew which onewas right, though, probably.

Captain (01:07:33):
Yeah.

Jay (01:07:34):
Also, why are there three different porridges at wildly
different temperatures?
Like, how will those served?

Captain (01:07:39):
Yeah, I don't know.

Wilson (01:07:40):
Get her.

Captain (01:07:41):
And why don't you put them on the table and then walk
away?

Jay (01:07:45):
Alright, hope no one breaks in.
We gotta go, I guess, do bearstuff.
Bear o'clock already.

Captain (01:07:56):
I it's been so long since I've heard that story.
I don't remember why theyleave.

Jay (01:08:01):
I barely got a chance to eat.

Captain (01:08:03):
Oh my god, you need to shut up.
Not barely got a chance.
Do you hear him being stupid?

Wilson (01:08:09):
Uh no, I was talking about porridge.

Captain (01:08:12):
Sorry, it's time for our porridge.

Jay (01:08:14):
I feel like you're gonna like go eat porridge somewhere
and it's gonna be like wildlyunderwhelming.
Probably.
This is another word for thisis gruel.

Wilson (01:08:22):
I mean, gruel is it says it's a thinner version of
porridge.

Captain (01:08:28):
No.

Wilson (01:08:28):
Yeah.
Yeah, it's right here.
But I think oatmeal uh doescount as a type of porridge.

Jay (01:08:36):
Gotcha.
Okay.
I've had I've had but havepeople have you ever heard
people call it hot cereal?
I have heard that.
Yeah, that's what it's so funappetizing sounding.

Captain (01:08:43):
Wait, that's oatmeal.

Jay (01:08:45):
That that you said it's a type of porridge.

Wilson (01:08:46):
Yeah, so like it says porridge is a type of semi-solid
food made from soaking,poaching, or boiling in a milk
or water, and it's crushed inlike a ground ground starchy
plant, like grains.
So you could i I think youcould say oatmeal is porridge.
But if you hook it up with somewhat do you have, like garlic
butter and green onion?
Uh well I mean it can be it's acolour term.

Captain (01:09:09):
You're really trying to get chives in there.

Wilson (01:09:10):
He was he was using it up, that's all.
I mean, I see a lot of thingsyou can put in porridge.

Captain (01:09:15):
Squash porridge?
No.

Jay (01:09:17):
I mean all those things you can put in porridge to make it
taste better, you can put onanything else.
It's like I can put butter inthere.
I was like, okay, you can putbutter on.

Captain (01:09:26):
You know, when I see porridge, to me, it looks like
mashed potatoes.

Wilson (01:09:30):
I see oatmeal.
When I see porridge, I likepictures of it.
I'm like, it's oatmeal.

Jay (01:09:34):
Hot cereal.

Captain (01:09:35):
Well, Lucas's was really whipped up.

Jay (01:09:37):
You guys ever have the hot cereal with the dino eggs that
hatch?
Yes.
That's how my parents.

Wilson (01:09:40):
That was like a TV T.
Even though I didn't like itthen.

Jay (01:09:42):
No, I didn't like it, but that was like, okay, I'll eat it
for the dino eggs.
Yeah.

Wilson (01:09:46):
You gotta have them hatch.
I mean, like they they open up.
Yeah, they open up.

Jay (01:09:48):
Yeah, I was like, what?
Oh yeah.
That's how you get kids to eatoatmeal.
Yeah, but oatmeal sucks.
I guess it's cheap.
That's why.

Wilson (01:09:56):
I like oatmeal now.
I just don't eat it very often.
Like, put some raisins in therewith banana.
Well, okay, you don't likeoatmeal.
Yeah, I don't like banana.

Jay (01:10:05):
Yeah.

Captain (01:10:06):
Um, sorry, I think I've ever oh sorry, you can.
No, I was just looking, I Ithink that's all the hot gas I
have, but I actually really likethis movie.
Well so I gave it a 3.5, and Ithink my actual like percentage
rating probably would be Yeah,like a like a 66.

Wilson (01:10:26):
Okay, I gave it a 65.

Jay (01:10:29):
I gave it a 69.

Wilson (01:10:31):
59.

Captain (01:10:32):
You're not gonna finish that.
What?
Nice.
Yeah.

Jay (01:10:37):
I mean, I could have given it a 67, but nobody's ever liked
you.

Captain (01:10:46):
Nobody's ever liked you.

Wilson (01:10:47):
69 works for me.
Um, this is the last episode ofthe season, right?

Captain (01:10:50):
We're closing out season something.

Wilson (01:10:53):
Season eight.
Maybe.
I think it's season eight.

Captain (01:10:56):
We're closing out season eight.

Wilson (01:10:58):
I don't know how the seasons were.

Captain (01:10:59):
Six, seven, eight.

Jay (01:11:03):
Got him.

Captain (01:11:04):
Got him.

Jay (01:11:06):
Hold on to your porridge.

Captain (01:11:08):
Yeah, uh, but I think this was a good Christmas
episode to end on.
There's not that many Christmashurrars.
So, um, you know.

Jay (01:11:14):
That's the best Christmas horror I've seen.
Yeah.

Captain (01:11:16):
Wait, more than Creanthus?

Jay (01:11:18):
I never I don't think I ever saw Creanthora.

Wilson (01:11:20):
Maybe next year we can watch uh uh Silent Night.
They're coming out in thesecond one.

Jay (01:11:24):
Oh.

Captain (01:11:25):
Oh.
I think so.
I think we have a um list puttogether here.

Wilson (01:11:29):
Well, tell the German culture then.
Oh, it's a German boogie.
I think it's yeah.

Captain (01:11:35):
And it's the German version of Santa, but he's like
a little mischievous.
Oh, yeah.

Wilson (01:11:38):
He is punishes rather than rewards.

Captain (01:11:40):
I was about to say, like, Krampus is a lot of fun.
If you're bad, you getpunished.
If you're good, you get notpunished.

Jay (01:11:45):
Yeah.
Krampus sounds like he eatschildren.

Wilson (01:11:47):
I well, I mean, he kind of does.

Jay (01:11:49):
Oh, I think you watch this movie.
It's a good movie.

Wilson (01:11:52):
I mean, Adam Scott's in there, Tony Collett.

Jay (01:11:54):
Adam Scott's in there?
Mm-hmm.
What?

Captain (01:11:56):
Um, I do have a Christmas movie already picked
out.
Oh, what else?

Jay (01:11:59):
What is it?
Die Hard?

Captain (01:12:00):
It's a wonderful knife.

Jay (01:12:02):
It's a wonderful knife.
All right.

Captain (01:12:05):
Well, we uh I mean we got a Santa as a serial killer.
Wait, do I have that one pickedout?
Wow.

Jay (01:12:12):
Well, where did you pull it?
This has been a roller coasterride.

Captain (01:12:15):
No, I think that's the next one.
I I wasn't sure how far along Idid this season, but I think
that, yes, that should be thelast.
Yes.
Um okay.
Yes.
Um I know this is gonna be awhile from now, but our next our
next time on the podcast we'redoing Curves.
I did the homework already, soI'm already prepped.
Yeah, and I'm so sorry.
I just have to remember.

(01:12:36):
Yeah, it's a horror moviecalled Curds.
Wow.
You'll never guess.
Never guess.

Jay (01:12:47):
That's the horrors of the cheese in having Pride Place is
getting out of control.
Yeah, but this is like a bigcurd.

Captain (01:12:55):
Yeah, I was gonna say, is this like a big curd takedown
movie?
Is this like a um cursed?
Uh oh.

Wilson (01:13:02):
It's a good cast, though.
But we'll find out next year.

Captain (01:13:05):
Yeah, but if you're looking for like a funny um
horror comedy Christmas movie, Idefinitely would recommend.

Wilson (01:13:11):
I would too.
I was pleasantly surprised bythis.

Captain (01:13:14):
You're welcome.
Um.

Jay (01:13:19):
Any other notes, thoughts in the movie?
Huh?
Is it any other notes orthoughts on the movie?

Captain (01:13:23):
Um, advice needs to be given.

Jay (01:13:27):
Oh, yeah.

Wilson (01:13:28):
You you need the advice, right?

Captain (01:13:30):
Well, do do we have advice?
Do we have a function?
Do I have advice?

Wilson (01:13:34):
Oh, yeah.
Give us the advice.

Captain (01:13:36):
I mean, you are the guest.
It's Jay's guest at our advice.

Jay (01:13:40):
I will say if someone leaves a bowl of really tasty
porridge in the fridge.

Captain (01:13:45):
Oh.

Jay (01:13:45):
Yeah.
Don't just scarf it down infront of the kids.

Wilson (01:13:48):
Don't Goldilocks it.

Captain (01:13:50):
Oh, don't Goldilocks it.
That's a good one.

Jay (01:13:52):
It's worse than Goldilocks, because he's just like eating
it in front of the kid, and thenthe kid's like, hey, that's my
porridge.
He's like, Oh yeah, sorry, Igot hungry.
No, no, he doesn't say sorry.
Sorry, he doesn't say sorry.
There's no apology.
I got hungry.
He puts the empty bowl in frontof the child and says, bye.
We'll figure something outlater, bud.
So don't do that.

(01:14:15):
If you see food in the person'snot yours, don't eat it.
It might come back to home.