December 9, 2024 • 26 mins
Episode 7: In the Doghouse...
Sponsored by SoCool Shirts – because looking cool has never been easier (or funnier).
This week on Miller Morning Madhouse, Jerry Pancake and Josh Scramble team up with the ever-entertaining Elizabeth Benedict to bring you an unforgettable episode full of nostalgia, surprise endings, and laughs so big, they might scare your guinea pig.
🌐 First, we’re traveling back in time to the early days of AOL and the internet. Remember that sweet sound of dial-up connecting? From chatroom chaos to regrettable screen names, we’re reliving the wild west of cyberspace – where every "You've Got Mail" felt like a gift from the internet gods.
🎉 Next, the story of a dog at a rave takes center stage. This furry partygoer had the time of their life under the strobe lights, but hold onto your glow sticks because the ending to this tale is guaranteed to catch you off guard. Let's just say, it’s not your typical “fetch” story.
🐹 Finally, we dive into the strange and mysterious world of guinea pigs and the Pancake brothers. Why were they not allowed to have pets?
🎙️ And don’t miss the featured clip from Deez Nutz, Jerry Pancake’s comedy album that has the internet buzzing. If you haven’t heard it yet, what are you even doing with your life?
As always, thank you for listening! Don’t forget to rate and subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify, and head to SoCoolShirts.com for the coolest designs this side of the internet.
Stay tuned for next week’s antics – assuming Jerry doesn’t get lost in the AOL archives or Josh doesn’t try to resurrect the guinea pig.
Stay Cool – JP
- (00:22) - Welcome to WSPR Super Beach Radio
- (00:52) - Internet Days and Guinea Pigs
- (02:46) - The Legend of Jerry Pancake
- (08:12) - A Dog's Misadventure
- (16:38) - The Rumble on Rush
- (17:54) - Growing Up with Pets
- (23:18) - The Ghost of the Guinea Pig
- (26:05) - Closing Thoughts and Thanks
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Elizabeth Benedict (00:18):
All you guys do
is just
sit up there and talk about howfucking cool you are.
Josh Scramble (00:23):
WSBR Super Beach Radio. In a mowing madhouse.
Talking all that crazyenergized, pancake and the
scramble. Audio breakfast withyour favorite guys.
(00:53):
Welcome back to the MillerMottee Mad House, everyone out
there in the brunch bunch.Today, on episode 8, we are
joined again by our newestcontributor, Elizabeth Benedict,
as we talk about the early daysof the Internet, good deeds gone
very wrong, and why all of theguinea pigs freeze up whenever
Jerry is around.
As usual, we would like to thankour sponsor, so cool shirts.com,
the place to go if you wanna bevocal and dress local with
(01:16):
hundreds of unique items anddesigns. There's always
something to be found that'llfit your body and your
personality. Sit back,
relax, and enjoy the laughs.
Jerry Pancake (01:30):
No. It's You were living a good life in 98, I bet.
Josh Scramble (01:34):
I was 16.
Jerry Pancake (01:36):
Oh, man. You were and so did you have the Internet
at 16? That was one
Josh Scramble (01:42):
of the things that I talked.
Elizabeth Benedict (01:44):
Internet 5.
Josh Scramble (01:45):
Internet. Young people. Boop. Yeah. America
Online kinda was, like, my 5thOh, baby.
6th grade. Oh, yeah. Hey. I got30 hours free off that CD. Calm
down.
Elizabeth Benedict (01:57):
I I had it too. I loved it.
Jerry Pancake (02:00):
Yeah. The sound of that. And then those those
chat rooms, though.
Josh Scramble (02:09):
You've got mail.
Jerry Pancake (02:10):
So I was probably on there, like because I'm older
than Josh Scramble. So I wasprobably on there at the same
time, and it it Hang on aminute. Kinda haunts me Jerry
Creeper? It kinda haunts me tothink that we were probably
looking at the same porn thatwas coming across, and it took a
long time to get just onepicture.
Josh Scramble (02:29):
Oh, yeah. Because it was, like, you would take 10
minutes for the line to goacross. Like, it was a a minute
and a half before it reached,like, top of the mountain in
your bowl. You for?
Jerry Pancake (02:37):
But it's like time travel. Right? Like,
because I was the in the sameplace as you, but you were just
You were also in
Josh Scramble (02:44):
the same
place as
Elizabeth Benedict (02:45):
me, and I was 9.
Jerry Pancake (02:47):
Oh, dear lord. But you were not probably in the
No. In, like, whateverobviously. Whatever chat I was
in, like, Big Naturals
Josh Scramble (02:54):
looking in the
Jerry Pancake (02:54):
same place
Josh Scramble (02:55):
as you. Wow. You were talking to other wow. Okay.
Jerry Pancake (02:58):
The like, the admirers of big naturals.
Josh Scramble (03:00):
Remember Sydney Margolis. Like, she was, like,
the first, like, Internet womansensation. Like, she was the
most downloaded woman at onepoint. And she was just like she
was a good looking woman, butshe was just, like, random
blonde.
Jerry Pancake (03:12):
She is very natural looking.
Josh Scramble (03:15):
Apparently, natural is the key with Jerry.
Jerry Pancake (03:18):
I don't If you've been
Josh Scramble (03:19):
to the doctor, you ain't been to me. So like,
unnatural?
Jerry Pancake (03:23):
That's when Yeah. I mean, if it's done okay. But
you didn't get videos,Elizabeth, and I know you're a
big fan of the videos with theTikToks
Josh Scramble (03:32):
Oh, no.
And all
Jerry Pancake (03:33):
and all the reels and
Josh Scramble (03:34):
all of doing that. But they were, like,
posted to somebody. Oh my god.Yeah. It was an big.
Have to load.
Jerry Pancake (03:40):
It was this big, and your monitor was, like
Elizabeth Benedict (03:42):
even try.
Jerry Pancake (03:43):
You you had a
Josh Scramble (03:44):
It was like You had a all you could get? It was
yeah. I mean, it was up tillthen, it was the Sears catalog
and a stolen Playboy. And thenall of a sudden, like, boom.
Jerry Pancake (03:53):
It's like, oh, I could get the dudes.
Josh Scramble (03:56):
The man could
Jerry Pancake (03:56):
get the dude. And sometimes people would send you
some fucked up shit, which youdidn't ask for.
Elizabeth Benedict (04:03):
Good. Yeah.
Josh Scramble (04:03):
Yeah. The, No.
Elizabeth Benedict (04:04):
I understand the parental controls my parents
put on. Oh,
Jerry Pancake (04:07):
they they would just unsolicited, like,
unsolicited.
Elizabeth Benedict (04:10):
My parents now.
Josh Scramble (04:11):
You'd be
Jerry Pancake (04:12):
in some chat room
Josh Scramble (04:13):
and When when you've gotten mail, it became a
nightmare, but you've got mail.Yeah. No.
Jerry Pancake (04:17):
No. But, like Oh,
Elizabeth Benedict (04:18):
that was good for me.
Jerry Pancake (04:19):
You'd be in the, let's say, the big naturals
chat, and you're thinking I'mgonna get some photos of some
breasts or whatever. They'retalking about the whole bunch of
big black dick would just comeup, and, like, the guy would be
like, I got you, motherfucker,or whatever. And I'm like, oh,
that wasn't that funny,
Josh Scramble (04:38):
sir. Elizabeth Benedict's face right now. Like,
the look of pure horror.
Jerry Pancake (04:42):
But you would have to wait to see too. That
was the torture of it. Right?Like, you just No. You just
know.
You just be like, oh,
Josh Scramble (04:48):
I'm just waiting to
Elizabeth Benedict (04:49):
I didn't I didn't use it for these
purposes.
Jerry Pancake (04:51):
Oh, you'd be like, oh, this might be great.
Josh Scramble (04:53):
I wish I was doing my homework.
Jerry Pancake (04:55):
And Josh Grambles sending out big huge picture of
black nicks.
Elizabeth Benedict (04:58):
To be clear, we've got 3 generations here, I
think.
Josh Scramble (05:01):
Sure. Yeah. Because we're all about 10 year
well, yeah, we're all about 10years apart. Years apart, and
you're 2
Elizabeth Benedict (05:06):
you 2 are within 10 years apart. And,
sadly, you and I are within
Josh Scramble (05:12):
more than 10.
Elizabeth Benedict (05:15):
Don't say you're within 10.
Jerry Pancake (05:19):
Yeah. More than 10.
Josh Scramble (05:20):
So Jerry was going on for all the wrong
reasons.
Elizabeth Benedict (05:24):
This is interesting.
Josh Scramble (05:25):
I was going on to just figure out what was going
on, and you were still I washang I was like it
Elizabeth Benedict (05:31):
was like a chance for me to hang out with
my high school friends afterhigh school.
Josh Scramble (05:34):
No. No. Middle school. Hang out. I was a
second.
Middle school.
Jerry Pancake (05:37):
Middle school is 9 years old. Yeah.
Elizabeth Benedict (05:39):
Because we didn't have a phone I didn't
have a phone at that age.
Josh Scramble (05:41):
No one had a phone
Jerry Pancake (05:42):
at that age. You had a phone. It was a a senior
at all.
Elizabeth Benedict (05:46):
Well, yes. But
Josh Scramble (05:48):
it was a way for
Elizabeth Benedict (05:49):
me to talk talk to someone without someone
listening. I think it was
Jerry Pancake (05:54):
Okay. So, yeah, you when you were chatting
Josh Scramble (05:56):
I am. Yeah. Yeah.
Elizabeth Benedict (05:57):
Yeah. But, like, it was in the living room.
It wasn't in my bedroom.
Josh Scramble (06:01):
So But I think yours was in your room.
Jerry Pancake (06:05):
Those were always the time those were also the
times of the family computer,though.
Josh Scramble (06:10):
Oh, yeah.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:10):
You I had the family computer where it was
like
Jerry Pancake (06:14):
So, like, you don't wanna get that family
computer dirty. No.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:19):
You Also, anyone could walk in at any
moment.
Jerry Pancake (06:22):
True. Yes. Because it's probably in the
dining room.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:25):
Behind me for a lot of it. Really? Oh,
sure.
Jerry Pancake (06:28):
So, like, someone would message you in a chat.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:32):
I wore kneepads when I would, like,
rollerblade.
Jerry Pancake (06:35):
Oh, she was very protective. Okay. I didn't
didn't know where that wasgoing.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:39):
Speak, by the way. I loved that. The
protectiveness. What you talkedabout or did was that a dream?
Josh Scramble (06:46):
I don't know what you're talking about.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:48):
Did you guys talk about knee pads or, like,
protective parents?
Jerry Pancake (06:53):
Or
Elizabeth Benedict (06:53):
did I have a
Jerry Pancake (06:53):
dream or a cat? No. I just said that my parents
may be afraid of everything.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:57):
Yes. That was it. That was it. That was
it.
Josh Scramble (06:59):
Kinda different, but kind of as well. I was gonna
Jerry Pancake (07:01):
say I was related. But, also, they did not
protect me from anything. Sothey made me they did not they
would not give me kneepads. Theywould just be like, get the fuck
out of the house, and I don'tcare if you climb up a tree or
set shit yourself on fire.
Elizabeth Benedict (07:15):
Might die. Good luck.
Jerry Pancake (07:16):
Like, I don't care.
Josh Scramble (07:17):
Just But at the same time
Jerry Pancake (07:18):
don't, like, bother me.
Elizabeth Benedict (07:19):
She's like she's like, you might die. Good
luck.
Jerry Pancake (07:21):
Yeah. Just don't bother me.
Josh Scramble (07:23):
But there's a beauty in that because you sin
the herd like the dumbasses thatyou don't want living, like,
fuck themselves up.
Elizabeth Benedict (07:29):
Yeah. You prefer for your own kids,
though, to be one of them.
Jerry Pancake (07:32):
Or, like, you have something terrible happen
to you because, like, theydidn't
Josh Scramble (07:35):
Like, you got hit by a car or or
Jerry Pancake (07:37):
I don't know. You lose a leg somehow, like or get
sucked up into a twister likeBilly Naylor.
Josh Scramble (07:42):
That's you know, the slowest the slowest lion
gets eaten at the Serengeti.
Jerry Pancake (07:47):
Jesus Christ.
Josh Scramble (07:49):
WSBR Super Beach Radio, the best station between
Rush and Ripley. We love playingmusic, but right now, we have to
pay some bills.
Coming this Sunday, a special broadcast on
(08:11):
WSPR Radio, a celebration oflocal legend Jerry Pancake and
his cult classic comedy album,Dee's Nuts. What the does this
kid want?
Yo, man, man. How are you doing today?
Jerry Pancake (08:24):
You're the kid? Where is parents? That kid.
Josh Scramble (08:28):
We take a deep look at the album as well as
Jerry's full life and career.
Jerry Pancake (08:32):
If I see this kid Jevon again, I'm coming up with
the most epic D's Nuts joke. I'mgonna kill it. Oh, hey, Jevon. I
also have a package for you.It's D's Nuts.
Delivery confirmation signaturerequired, you little.
Josh Scramble (08:47):
Including rare discussion between broadcast a
listers Howard Stern and JimmyKimmel.
Howard Stern (08:51):
There are much worse clips than that. There are
much far there where he hisannoyance is very clear, and the
audience becomes veryuncomfortable.
Maybe I'll have, we'll track down all of the
where he's annoyed.
Josh Scramble (09:02):
That would be a
Howard Stern (09:03):
you know what? That would be a beautiful
tribute to Jerry and his genius.
Jerry Pancake (09:06):
So great. It's all angry.
Howard Stern (09:08):
Oh, yeah. He was very angry.
Jerry full of disdain. Well, I'm endlessly
fascinated by whypsychologically Jerry was so
angry, and, of course, it alwaysgoes back to your parents. You
can see just exactly Jerry'storture.
Well, Jerry, I think, also genuinely was a
genius. Like, you know, you're agenius applied to a lot of
people, but I think his personaprobably started to annoy him,
(09:30):
and then he had toovercompensate to show people
how smart he was.
And he's, you know, he's caught between I
wanna be the sex I wanna be the,you know, a guy who's attractive
to women, and then I wanna bethe buffoon.
Yeah. Although, I think he put a buffoon aside as
for except for occasional moment. Like, Jerry
was really a good guest on,Letterman. Oh, really? Yeah.
It's really it's really good.
(09:51):
Yeah. He was something else. He I he's one of
the most interesting people.
Josh Scramble (09:55):
Hear the full round table as well as a special
broadcast of the album, Dee'sNuts, this Sunday at noon, Jerry
Pancake, where have all the goodtimes gone? Only on WSBR, and
find Dee's Nuts wherever you getyour music.
(10:21):
WSBR Super Beach Radio, the number one station
between Rush and Ripley.
Elizabeth Benedict (10:27):
I'm actually okay if this goes on air.
Jerry Pancake (10:30):
Okay.
Elizabeth Benedict (10:30):
So there was one of those awesome music
things down at the beach.
Josh Scramble (10:36):
Mhmm. Like a DJJ.
Elizabeth Benedict (10:38):
Yeah. So I saw a dog, and he looked really
lost. I didn't see a whatever. Ithought I knew where he lived,
so I took him up to the housewhere I thought I knew. So,
apparently, I I I kidnapped adog.
(11:00):
Jesus.
Jerry Pancake (11:01):
And you gave it to the wrong person?
Elizabeth Benedict (11:03):
Wrong house. And I opened the door and put
the dog into the wrong house.
Jerry Pancake (11:08):
Oh, man. That's Jesus Christ. Wow.
Josh Scramble (11:12):
Yeah.
Jerry Pancake (11:12):
So how did those people react? They were like,
what the fuck? You just talkedto me
Josh Scramble (11:17):
in my house. I moved
Elizabeth Benedict (11:18):
I moved too fast. I didn't
Josh Scramble (11:20):
Like a ninja. I didn't
Elizabeth Benedict (11:21):
I didn't want them to
Jerry Pancake (11:22):
Have you ever admitted this to these people?
Elizabeth Benedict (11:25):
I'm actually trusting you with this. I'm
trying
Josh Scramble (11:27):
to Yeah. We're not Yeah. We're here.
Elizabeth Benedict (11:29):
Actually, you know what? The the people
don't know who I am, really.
Jerry Pancake (11:32):
No one can charge you with a crime for this. I
don't think
Elizabeth Benedict (11:35):
And by the way, if
Josh Scramble (11:36):
if you're still listening know, the dog
technically broke and entered.
Elizabeth Benedict (11:40):
And if you just were listening, I'm really
sorry. I was trying to do a goodthing.
Jerry Pancake (11:44):
Right? Get that dog home. That dog doesn't need
to be out at that stupid fuckingDJ party.
Josh Scramble (11:51):
I was confused.
I was confused.
Jerry Pancake (11:53):
The dog's probably scared. Right.
Fireworks going off. There'ssome guy or some lady with the
flames. They always have theflame lady.
Right?
Josh Scramble (12:02):
Did it burn. Yeah.
Jerry Pancake (12:06):
They're like the guys in the microphone. Like,
he's sucking the like, DJMarshmallow.
Elizabeth Benedict (12:13):
As Mark can serve out the dog.
Jerry Pancake (12:14):
And then somebody is gonna final you out there.
It's happened to me severaltimes.
Josh Scramble (12:19):
I've been to 3 of those things those things.
Jerry Pancake (12:22):
And, like, somebody walked up. Know. And I
don't know if it was a man or awoman. Tickle your jiggly bits.
Yes.
They did touch my dick.
Elizabeth Benedict (12:30):
It didn't matter. What?
Jerry Pancake (12:32):
Couple times or balls. Like, they got they got
some of it some of them. Yeah.That dog didn't wanna be at that
DJ party for sure, so you didhim a favor.
Josh Scramble (12:43):
Well, the thing about that DJ party was a little
it was a little rough.
Jerry Pancake (12:49):
Nobody nobody understands what dogs hear too,
so it could be excruciating onthe dog.
Josh Scramble (12:55):
Oh, sure it is. Is. Because if they hear
Elizabeth Benedict (12:56):
loud. Yeah. He was walking around, and I I
told my husband. I said, hey,I'm gonna take this dog home. He
goes, do you know where itlives?
And I said, I'm pretty sure
Josh Scramble (13:07):
I do.
Jerry Pancake (13:08):
Pretty sure. Pretty sure it's not
Josh Scramble (13:10):
a 100%. He said,
Elizabeth Benedict (13:11):
what if it's not the right house? And I said,
well, at least it's in a safehouse. And I've Here's the
thing. I love
Josh Scramble (13:19):
whoever I
Jerry Pancake (13:20):
think I just love that you
Josh Scramble (13:21):
like, their house was open and you my favorite
thing about this entire story.So it's a it's a
Elizabeth Benedict (13:27):
beautiful house. I'm really sorry whoever
Josh Scramble (13:29):
It's a Saturday summer night.
Jerry Pancake (13:31):
You have a beautiful home. You have a dog.
Elizabeth Benedict (13:33):
It's a compliment. I'm I I didn't want
that dog out.
Josh Scramble (13:36):
You know what? No one's that's why you lock your
doors in this neighborhood so noone compliments you as a dog.
Elizabeth Benedict (13:41):
Door is open. It's like, I'll take any
animal that's really worriedabout.
Josh Scramble (13:44):
That's what most of the that's that's like the
new single site. We'll take anyanimal.
Elizabeth Benedict (13:48):
I'll take it.
Jerry Pancake (13:49):
That is the flamingo at, like, 1 in the
morning. Any animal that wannasee.
Elizabeth Benedict (13:54):
Like, we all look out for. The
Josh Scramble (13:56):
thing I can't stop thinking about is it's a
beautiful summer Saturdayevening. You come home after a
nice lovely day with, you know,you had a great day at the
beach. You met some friends outat a nice lovely dinner. You had
a nice, you know, rose with yoursteak. You come home and all of
a sudden, like, like, what wasgoing on?
Why is there some random doghere? And then you walk in,
(14:17):
like, boom. There's a dog justlaying on your bed, like, hello.
And then 1, you have to realize,where is this dog? And then 2,
try to figure out where itbelongs.
Hopefully, it's your next doorneighbor.
Elizabeth Benedict (14:30):
I would love to hear from whoever owns that
dog.
Jerry Pancake (14:33):
Reach out to us, 219, at the, 29 dog find. No.
It's 2 it's 2 we actually have aphone number. 219 I'm sorry.
2004280.
Reach out to us here. And if youstill have the dog, good on you.
Josh Scramble (14:50):
Yeah. What if you have
Jerry Pancake (14:51):
the dog now, you're like,
Josh Scramble (14:52):
we're not we're not finding the original owner.
Yeah. I mean
Elizabeth Benedict (14:54):
if I'm the right owner, but I would love to
hear
Jerry Pancake (14:58):
The story. Yeah.
Josh Scramble (14:58):
Do you remember the house? Because I will
actually go interview thesepeople.
Elizabeth Benedict (15:02):
I do know the house.
Jerry Pancake (15:03):
On the street.
Elizabeth Benedict (15:03):
It's the
Josh Scramble (15:04):
one I will totally do this.
Elizabeth Benedict (15:06):
Time. It's like, oh, yeah. Let's do this.
And then the next day, it's like
Josh Scramble (15:10):
Alcohol. That's the that's the answer to that.
Alcohol.
Jerry Pancake (15:13):
So I would imagine that dog, like, if you
put it in that
Josh Scramble (15:17):
He was
Jerry Pancake (15:17):
so commercial
Josh Scramble (15:34):
talking to the wrong house. You were walking
down the street, and then youall those people you meet. You
saw a cool fish, and then youstuck me in the house. Now I am
on the loose, and I need to findthe house. Boom.
Jerry Pancake (15:46):
Yeah. Like, what a better ending for that dog
than just getting executed.
Elizabeth Benedict (15:51):
That's what I thought.
Josh Scramble (15:52):
Sarah McLaughlin has nothing on DJ Fuckface at
the beach.
Elizabeth Benedict (15:57):
I just want it to be home safe somewhere.
Jerry Pancake: Homesafesomewhere.com. (15:59):
undefined
Josh Scramble (16:02):
Would it have been something if, like, it was
a house full of cats and all ofa sudden these cats are
Jerry Pancake (16:05):
Oh, yeah. The cats are You fucking flipped the
fuck out.
Elizabeth Benedict (16:08):
Comment that that I did they
Josh Scramble (16:09):
put the
Elizabeth Benedict (16:10):
dog in that house. Don't
Jerry Pancake (16:12):
dog. Look like you really have a dog safe
house. Thanks.
Josh Scramble (16:16):
Meanwhile
Jerry Pancake (16:16):
Yeah. Thanks for leaving your door open. Now you
have some random ass dog in yourhouse.
Josh Scramble (16:21):
This looks like a good home. Look at the mailbox.
It's the Vic household. I'm surethey'll be really nice to that
dog.
Elizabeth Benedict (16:29):
I don't even I'm sorry for the whoever I put
that dog
Josh Scramble (16:34):
in your house. I'm so
Elizabeth Benedict (16:36):
sorry. I hope Not something
Josh Scramble (16:38):
you hear right, Jay. But I hope I hope it worked
out well.
WSPR Super Beach Radio.
Sunday, Sunday, Sunday, Sunday, the Miller Beach
Wrestling Federation is proud tobring you The Rumble on Rush.
Live from Ponton Park, come seethe greatest night in wrestling
as hometown hero, Jen Pancake,takes on the Greek freak Gina
(16:58):
Papadopoulos for the MBWFwomen's title in an I Quit
match. See what Holt will win.Jen's curtain call clutch versus
Gina Saganaki sleeper. And theaction is all up and down the
card as Jose T will be defendingthe little person's title
against 29 others in the smallbattle royal.
Small fry Sam, little Leopold,Oompa Woopa Larry, and all your
(17:22):
other little favors will bevying for the small person
crowd. And not to be missed, the5th best athlete in Miller,
Derek D, will be taking on allcomers in a no disqualification
with football bat match. It'sgoing to be nothing but yellow
bats and minor abrasions. Youcan't get more action in 1 yard?
Can't make it live?
Find a live broadcast for$499.99 on Gauge as you view pay
(17:46):
per view. Can you dig it,sucker? WSBR Super Beach Radio.
Elizabeth Benedict (17:55):
Did you have fish tanks growing up?
Jerry Pancake (17:57):
Yeah. I did.
Elizabeth Benedict (17:58):
And? I
Jerry Pancake (17:59):
liked them. They're fine. Just something
else to do because we didn'thave fucking computers like you
kids.
Elizabeth Benedict (18:06):
What about furry animals?
Jerry Pancake (18:09):
I don't even wanna go into this. But
Elizabeth Benedict (18:11):
Next week?
Jerry Pancake (18:12):
No. We so our parents, wouldn't let us have
any animals, because well,guinea pigs. So they let us have
have the guinea pigs, and thenmy brother and I played catch
with 1 of the guinea pigs.Jesus. What the fuck?
Died.
Josh Scramble (18:29):
Yesterday.
Jerry Pancake (18:31):
Yeah. Like, we put it down the slide. We were,
like, playing with it. Becausewe really needed, like, a dog,
like a durable dog. Like adurable like, a big dog that's
durable.
My brother and I were, like,some ragamuffin 3 rascals kinda
shit, and we needed, like, a,like, a dog. But my fucking mom
(18:52):
got us guinea pigs, and thenthere's this little tiny
delicate things that we'refucking playing catch with them
because we're, you know, 4 and2.
Elizabeth Benedict (18:59):
Worse too.
Jerry Pancake (19:00):
Well, I mean, we didn't know. And so the guinea
pig died, and then we weren'tallowed after that to have any
pets, at all.
Josh Scramble (19:11):
Think that your parents really wouldn't let you
have pets
Elizabeth Benedict (19:14):
so bad.
Josh Scramble (19:14):
Or do you think the guinea pig was, like, a
trial pet, and you fucked thatup. So they're like, dude,
Jerry Pancake (19:20):
get us a like, a rottweiler or some shit. That's
what we needed, like a toughdog.
Elizabeth Benedict (19:24):
Sorry. No. I think they figured out real
quick that you can't haveanimals. So Because you're
playing catch with guinea pigs.
Josh Scramble (19:31):
So I thought Like, a ball
Elizabeth Benedict (19:34):
playing catch with a ball was
Jerry Pancake (19:35):
one thing. Put it down the slide.
Elizabeth Benedict (19:38):
That's that's a dog.
Josh Scramble (19:39):
But it wasn't a summer day when you put it down,
like, the scorching hot slide?
Jerry Pancake (19:42):
Yes. That was. And then
Josh Scramble (19:44):
So I thought you were gonna say that your parents
were gonna allow you to have onebecause they didn't want it.
Like, my parents, we never hadpets. My first pet, I was, like,
20 something because my dadnever wanted us to have to deal
with it dying.
Jerry Pancake (19:57):
Oh, well, that would be a sweet
Josh Scramble (19:58):
thing. Here's
Jerry Pancake (20:00):
To protect you from, but
Josh Scramble (20:01):
No. It's also inside story. He didn't wanna
have to get attached to it andalso wanna have to deal with it
dying. So
Jerry Pancake (20:07):
We know there's emotional problems.
Josh Scramble (20:09):
But, like, I was gonna ask that question, but I
think your parents realized wehave fuck up kids that are gonna
use a goddamn living thing as agoddamn football.
Jerry Pancake (20:16):
Anyway, because of this, we, we would round up
all the stray cats
Josh Scramble (20:23):
Oh, it was.
Jerry Pancake (20:25):
In the neighborhood, and we would put
them on leashes and then, like,Jesus Christ, and, like, chain
them up to a, like, a box or atree or whatever. You wiped the
cherry on
Josh Scramble (20:39):
the cats?
Jerry Pancake (20:40):
So they wouldn't leave us, because we liked like,
we had a
Elizabeth Benedict (20:44):
so much.
Jerry Pancake (20:46):
We didn't want him to leave, and our mother
said, oh, I'm definitely cactus.I'm definitely allergic to cats,
so you can't have cats in thehouse. So we wouldn't want them
to leave, so we tie them up inthe garage.
Josh Scramble (20:57):
Jerry, I'm never letting you in my house again
because I have cats, and I don'twant them We have
Jerry Pancake (21:02):
great cats. I don't I didn't kill the cats.
No. But We fed them and shit.What?
Josh Scramble (21:07):
Your name wasn't curiosity, was it? Because
Jerry Pancake (21:10):
we fed the cats and stuff. Like, there was a
Josh Scramble (21:13):
It's just the gerbils you had issues with.
Elizabeth Benedict (21:15):
So growing up growing up with the cats
There's
Josh Scramble (21:19):
so much in this. Like, I There's
Elizabeth Benedict (21:21):
so much. There's so much.
Josh Scramble (21:24):
I know. There's some there's a lot in this.
Jerry Pancake (21:27):
So there's a lot in in me.
Josh Scramble (21:29):
What age I have to at what age was the was it a
hamster or a gerbil?
Jerry Pancake (21:33):
It was a guinea pig. Oh, sorry. Guinea pig.
Josh Scramble (21:36):
3rd one.
Jerry Pancake (21:37):
So
Elizabeth Benedict (21:37):
Those are bigger.
Jerry Pancake (21:38):
They're bigger.
Josh Scramble (21:39):
Which is probably why they used it as a football
because they could palm it.Like, you know, like, the the
spine was kinda like the laces.
Jerry Pancake (21:45):
It was a it's a it's a terrible memory, man.
Like, I can remember when itbled from its nose.
Elizabeth Benedict (21:50):
And what
Josh Scramble (21:51):
made you do this again? Hang on. It bled from its
nose. So what? Did your brothernot catch it?
Oh
Elizabeth Benedict (21:55):
my god.
Jerry Pancake (21:56):
You might have dropped it.
Elizabeth Benedict (21:57):
Oh, could dude, you and why wait.
Josh Scramble (21:59):
Why did
Elizabeth Benedict (22:00):
we So
Josh Scramble (22:00):
you had a Chicago Bears receiver brother who
dropped her fucking guinea pig.
Elizabeth Benedict (22:04):
Oh, okay. So wait. You're playing catch with
it?
Josh Scramble (22:06):
Yeah.
Elizabeth Benedict (22:07):
Why again?
Jerry Pancake (22:08):
You're 4 into like, that's what you do.
Josh Scramble (22:13):
It's demented.
Elizabeth Benedict (22:14):
Maybe animals?
Jerry Pancake (22:15):
I mean, we didn't have a lot of toys. We didn't
have the Internet. Like, youfucks.
Josh Scramble (22:19):
So am I making the only connection here that
Jerry Pancake (22:22):
hang on. So We had a football somewhere, but we
maybe it was over the fence.
Elizabeth Benedict (22:26):
Play catch with an animal. Here.
Josh Scramble (22:27):
So I
Jerry Pancake (22:28):
think maybe that we thought the animal
Elizabeth Benedict (22:31):
No. You didn't.
Josh Scramble (22:31):
Well, let's let's really examine the Pancake
family line. Happening here.Your father knew several serial
killers, and that's usually atrait of them as they torture
small animals. So did hepossibly meet a 3rd and 4th
serial killer? I think Jerry'sdad is just really possibly meet
a 3rd and 4th serial killer?
I
Elizabeth Benedict (22:43):
think Jerry's dad
Josh Scramble (22:44):
is just really understanding. So, like, I
haven't started
killing yet.
Elizabeth Benedict (22:44):
Yet. Like
Jerry Pancake (22:45):
Yet. Maybe it's just the next career for me. But
Josh Scramble (22:56):
Well, you do.
Jerry Pancake (22:57):
I don't have three names in the that What is
Josh Scramble (23:00):
sort of a
Jerry Pancake (23:00):
middle name. George
Josh Scramble (23:02):
Cherry George Pancake. Yeah. No. That's not a
that's not a serial killer.Like, your name would have to
be, like
Jerry Pancake (23:08):
It has to be 2 first like, real first names.
Josh Scramble (23:11):
It would have to be, like, Jerry Sullivan pancake
because it's always a weirdmiddle of,
Jerry Pancake (23:16):
like, John Wilkes Booth. John Wilkes Booth. God,
what a what the fuck was thatguy's life like? Like, just like
Josh Scramble (23:26):
How fucked up are you when, like, there's no news
and you decide, I'm gonna gokill the president of the United
States or anything like that?
Jerry Pancake (23:33):
Too, Josh Scramble. I don't know if you
realize that.
Josh Scramble (23:35):
Because he jumped up. He was exploding Shakespeare
when he killed him. Like he
Jerry Pancake (23:40):
was acting in the community theater
Josh Scramble (23:43):
or whatever.
Jerry Pancake (23:43):
Speaker 1 (1h
Josh Scramble (23:43):
45m 20s)
Jerry Pancake (23:49):
Could you imagine if, like, someone I'm not saying
anyone would do this from theMiller Community Theater. And by
the way, shout out to the MillerCommunity Theater. Please visit
them as well as at the, MarshallJ Gardner Center.
Josh Scramble (24:03):
Well, I don't see Steven going full presidential
assassination.
Jerry Pancake (24:07):
But just think about it. Like, if someone was
like, I'm a thespian, and I'vedone 2 plays at the Miller
Community Theater, and I'm gonnago kill Joe Biden. Like, that is
what John John Wilkes Booth is.It's like he he was like, I'm
going for it all. I might notmake it as an actor, but I'm
(24:28):
gonna kill the fuckingpresident.
And I would argue he's just asfamous as Abraham Lincoln. You
ever seen my 8th grade picture?
Elizabeth Benedict (24:38):
No. Have you seen
Jerry Pancake (24:38):
my black I'm a black fella in that picture.
Josh Scramble (24:42):
Are you, like You
Elizabeth Benedict (24:42):
mean you're a dark complexion?
Josh Scramble (24:44):
So did you use No.
Jerry Pancake (24:45):
I have a Afro. I am full on. I will show it
Josh Scramble (24:49):
to you. Like Art Garfunkelfro?
Jerry Pancake (24:51):
It was a Jufro kind of. Ju Jufro.
Josh Scramble (24:54):
Jufro.
Jerry Pancake (24:55):
Yeah. It was very tight. And so my mother did my
hair at the time, and I contendto this day that she gave me a
perm right, but like, rightbefore picture day because
Josh Scramble (25:09):
my hair doesn't last this long.
Jerry Pancake (25:10):
Hair was like this.
Elizabeth Benedict (25:12):
It doesn't last this long.
Josh Scramble (25:13):
All the time. I got $20 saying he got the perm
because he threw the guinea pig.
Jerry Pancake (25:19):
That was years later. But my mom probably never
forgave me for that. Right? Shewas like, oh, that kid is a
serial
Elizabeth Benedict (25:26):
forgave you for that.
Jerry Pancake (25:27):
Well, he's dead. So
Elizabeth Benedict (25:29):
Still, he's still haunting your dream.
Jerry Pancake (25:31):
But then my grandmother got us a rabbit
after that.
Josh Scramble (25:34):
Be something like you know how everyone has those
mysterious noises in theirhouse? Like, wouldn't it be
something if it was the ghost ofthe guinea pig?
Elizabeth Benedict (25:41):
That's so real, though.
Jerry Pancake (25:44):
It could be. It could happen here. There's so
many things that scare me.
Josh Scramble (25:50):
You know, wouldn't be surprised if it
animals.
Elizabeth Benedict (25:53):
I've never abused animals.
Jerry Pancake (25:54):
Didn't. It was I was a child.
Elizabeth Benedict (25:56):
So was I. I've never abused animals.
Alright.
Josh Scramble (25:59):
Not to
Elizabeth Benedict (25:59):
make you feel bad, but
Josh Scramble (26:00):
Judgey. You should feel bad.
Elizabeth Benedict (26:01):
I'm gonna make you feel bad.
Jerry Pancake (26:03):
Judge Benedict over here.
Josh Scramble (26:05):
Well well, by by her namesake, she does play both
sides. Thanks again, everyone,for listening, and remember
to add this show to your favorites. New episodes
drop every other week and areavailable wherever you get your
pods.
And also feel free
to review us on your listening platform.
And also remember to shop at socoolshirts.com, the
place to be vocal and shoplocal.
Elizabeth Benedict (26:27):
All you guys do is just sit up there and talk
about how fucking cool you are.
Josh Scramble (26:32):
WSBR Super Beach rig. In the morning madhouse.
Talking all that crazyenergized, pancake and a
scramble. Audio breakfast withyour favorite eyes.
All you guys do
is just
sit up there and talk about howfucking cool you are.
Josh Scramble (00:23):
WSBR Super Beach Radio. In a mowing madhouse.
Talking all that crazyenergized, pancake and the
scramble. Audio breakfast withyour favorite guys.
(00:53):
Welcome back to the MillerMottee Mad House, everyone out
there in the brunch bunch.Today, on episode 8, we are
joined again by our newestcontributor, Elizabeth Benedict,
as we talk about the early daysof the Internet, good deeds gone
very wrong, and why all of theguinea pigs freeze up whenever
Jerry is around.
As usual, we would like to thankour sponsor, so cool shirts.com,
the place to go if you wanna bevocal and dress local with
(01:16):
hundreds of unique items anddesigns. There's always
something to be found that'llfit your body and your
personality. Sit back,
relax, and enjoy the laughs.
Jerry Pancake (01:30):
No. It's You were living a good life in 98, I bet.
Josh Scramble (01:34):
I was 16.
Jerry Pancake (01:36):
Oh, man. You were and so did you have the Internet
at 16? That was one
Josh Scramble (01:42):
of the things that I talked.
Elizabeth Benedict (01:44):
Internet 5.
Josh Scramble (01:45):
Internet. Young people. Boop. Yeah. America
Online kinda was, like, my 5thOh, baby.
6th grade. Oh, yeah. Hey. I got30 hours free off that CD. Calm
down.
Elizabeth Benedict (01:57):
I I had it too. I loved it.
Jerry Pancake (02:00):
Yeah. The sound of that. And then those those
chat rooms, though.
Josh Scramble (02:09):
You've got mail.
Jerry Pancake (02:10):
So I was probably on there, like because I'm older
than Josh Scramble. So I wasprobably on there at the same
time, and it it Hang on aminute. Kinda haunts me Jerry
Creeper? It kinda haunts me tothink that we were probably
looking at the same porn thatwas coming across, and it took a
long time to get just onepicture.
Josh Scramble (02:29):
Oh, yeah. Because it was, like, you would take 10
minutes for the line to goacross. Like, it was a a minute
and a half before it reached,like, top of the mountain in
your bowl. You for?
Jerry Pancake (02:37):
But it's like time travel. Right? Like,
because I was the in the sameplace as you, but you were just
You were also in
Josh Scramble (02:44):
the same
place as
Elizabeth Benedict (02:45):
me, and I was 9.
Jerry Pancake (02:47):
Oh, dear lord. But you were not probably in the
No. In, like, whateverobviously. Whatever chat I was
in, like, Big Naturals
Josh Scramble (02:54):
looking in the
Jerry Pancake (02:54):
same place
Josh Scramble (02:55):
as you. Wow. You were talking to other wow. Okay.
Jerry Pancake (02:58):
The like, the admirers of big naturals.
Josh Scramble (03:00):
Remember Sydney Margolis. Like, she was, like,
the first, like, Internet womansensation. Like, she was the
most downloaded woman at onepoint. And she was just like she
was a good looking woman, butshe was just, like, random
blonde.
Jerry Pancake (03:12):
She is very natural looking.
Josh Scramble (03:15):
Apparently, natural is the key with Jerry.
Jerry Pancake (03:18):
I don't If you've been
Josh Scramble (03:19):
to the doctor, you ain't been to me. So like,
unnatural?
Jerry Pancake (03:23):
That's when Yeah. I mean, if it's done okay. But
you didn't get videos,Elizabeth, and I know you're a
big fan of the videos with theTikToks
Josh Scramble (03:32):
Oh, no.
And all
Jerry Pancake (03:33):
and all the reels and
Josh Scramble (03:34):
all of doing that. But they were, like,
posted to somebody. Oh my god.Yeah. It was an big.
Have to load.
Jerry Pancake (03:40):
It was this big, and your monitor was, like
Elizabeth Benedict (03:42):
even try.
Jerry Pancake (03:43):
You you had a
Josh Scramble (03:44):
It was like You had a all you could get? It was
yeah. I mean, it was up tillthen, it was the Sears catalog
and a stolen Playboy. And thenall of a sudden, like, boom.
Jerry Pancake (03:53):
It's like, oh, I could get the dudes.
Josh Scramble (03:56):
The man could
Jerry Pancake (03:56):
get the dude. And sometimes people would send you
some fucked up shit, which youdidn't ask for.
Elizabeth Benedict (04:03):
Good. Yeah.
Josh Scramble (04:03):
Yeah. The, No.
Elizabeth Benedict (04:04):
I understand the parental controls my parents
put on. Oh,
Jerry Pancake (04:07):
they they would just unsolicited, like,
unsolicited.
Elizabeth Benedict (04:10):
My parents now.
Josh Scramble (04:11):
You'd be
Jerry Pancake (04:12):
in some chat room
Josh Scramble (04:13):
and When when you've gotten mail, it became a
nightmare, but you've got mail.Yeah. No.
Jerry Pancake (04:17):
No. But, like Oh,
Elizabeth Benedict (04:18):
that was good for me.
Jerry Pancake (04:19):
You'd be in the, let's say, the big naturals
chat, and you're thinking I'mgonna get some photos of some
breasts or whatever. They'retalking about the whole bunch of
big black dick would just comeup, and, like, the guy would be
like, I got you, motherfucker,or whatever. And I'm like, oh,
that wasn't that funny,
Josh Scramble (04:38):
sir. Elizabeth Benedict's face right now. Like,
the look of pure horror.
Jerry Pancake (04:42):
But you would have to wait to see too. That
was the torture of it. Right?Like, you just No. You just
know.
You just be like, oh,
Josh Scramble (04:48):
I'm just waiting to
Elizabeth Benedict (04:49):
I didn't I didn't use it for these
purposes.
Jerry Pancake (04:51):
Oh, you'd be like, oh, this might be great.
Josh Scramble (04:53):
I wish I was doing my homework.
Jerry Pancake (04:55):
And Josh Grambles sending out big huge picture of
black nicks.
Elizabeth Benedict (04:58):
To be clear, we've got 3 generations here, I
think.
Josh Scramble (05:01):
Sure. Yeah. Because we're all about 10 year
well, yeah, we're all about 10years apart. Years apart, and
you're 2
Elizabeth Benedict (05:06):
you 2 are within 10 years apart. And,
sadly, you and I are within
Josh Scramble (05:12):
more than 10.
Elizabeth Benedict (05:15):
Don't say you're within 10.
Jerry Pancake (05:19):
Yeah. More than 10.
Josh Scramble (05:20):
So Jerry was going on for all the wrong
reasons.
Elizabeth Benedict (05:24):
This is interesting.
Josh Scramble (05:25):
I was going on to just figure out what was going
on, and you were still I washang I was like it
Elizabeth Benedict (05:31):
was like a chance for me to hang out with
my high school friends afterhigh school.
Josh Scramble (05:34):
No. No. Middle school. Hang out. I was a
second.
Middle school.
Jerry Pancake (05:37):
Middle school is 9 years old. Yeah.
Elizabeth Benedict (05:39):
Because we didn't have a phone I didn't
have a phone at that age.
Josh Scramble (05:41):
No one had a phone
Jerry Pancake (05:42):
at that age. You had a phone. It was a a senior
at all.
Elizabeth Benedict (05:46):
Well, yes. But
Josh Scramble (05:48):
it was a way for
Elizabeth Benedict (05:49):
me to talk talk to someone without someone
listening. I think it was
Jerry Pancake (05:54):
Okay. So, yeah, you when you were chatting
Josh Scramble (05:56):
I am. Yeah. Yeah.
Elizabeth Benedict (05:57):
Yeah. But, like, it was in the living room.
It wasn't in my bedroom.
Josh Scramble (06:01):
So But I think yours was in your room.
Jerry Pancake (06:05):
Those were always the time those were also the
times of the family computer,though.
Josh Scramble (06:10):
Oh, yeah.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:10):
You I had the family computer where it was
like
Jerry Pancake (06:14):
So, like, you don't wanna get that family
computer dirty. No.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:19):
You Also, anyone could walk in at any
moment.
Jerry Pancake (06:22):
True. Yes. Because it's probably in the
dining room.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:25):
Behind me for a lot of it. Really? Oh,
sure.
Jerry Pancake (06:28):
So, like, someone would message you in a chat.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:32):
I wore kneepads when I would, like,
rollerblade.
Jerry Pancake (06:35):
Oh, she was very protective. Okay. I didn't
didn't know where that wasgoing.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:39):
Speak, by the way. I loved that. The
protectiveness. What you talkedabout or did was that a dream?
Josh Scramble (06:46):
I don't know what you're talking about.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:48):
Did you guys talk about knee pads or, like,
protective parents?
Jerry Pancake (06:53):
Or
Elizabeth Benedict (06:53):
did I have a
Jerry Pancake (06:53):
dream or a cat? No. I just said that my parents
may be afraid of everything.
Elizabeth Benedict (06:57):
Yes. That was it. That was it. That was
it.
Josh Scramble (06:59):
Kinda different, but kind of as well. I was gonna
Jerry Pancake (07:01):
say I was related. But, also, they did not
protect me from anything. Sothey made me they did not they
would not give me kneepads. Theywould just be like, get the fuck
out of the house, and I don'tcare if you climb up a tree or
set shit yourself on fire.
Elizabeth Benedict (07:15):
Might die. Good luck.
Jerry Pancake (07:16):
Like, I don't care.
Josh Scramble (07:17):
Just But at the same time
Jerry Pancake (07:18):
don't, like, bother me.
Elizabeth Benedict (07:19):
She's like she's like, you might die. Good
luck.
Jerry Pancake (07:21):
Yeah. Just don't bother me.
Josh Scramble (07:23):
But there's a beauty in that because you sin
the herd like the dumbasses thatyou don't want living, like,
fuck themselves up.
Elizabeth Benedict (07:29):
Yeah. You prefer for your own kids,
though, to be one of them.
Jerry Pancake (07:32):
Or, like, you have something terrible happen
to you because, like, theydidn't
Josh Scramble (07:35):
Like, you got hit by a car or or
Jerry Pancake (07:37):
I don't know. You lose a leg somehow, like or get
sucked up into a twister likeBilly Naylor.
Josh Scramble (07:42):
That's you know, the slowest the slowest lion
gets eaten at the Serengeti.
Jerry Pancake (07:47):
Jesus Christ.
Josh Scramble (07:49):
WSBR Super Beach Radio, the best station between
Rush and Ripley. We love playingmusic, but right now, we have to
pay some bills.
Coming this Sunday, a special broadcast on
(08:11):
WSPR Radio, a celebration oflocal legend Jerry Pancake and
his cult classic comedy album,Dee's Nuts. What the does this
kid want?
Yo, man, man. How are you doing today?
Jerry Pancake (08:24):
You're the kid? Where is parents? That kid.
Josh Scramble (08:28):
We take a deep look at the album as well as
Jerry's full life and career.
Jerry Pancake (08:32):
If I see this kid Jevon again, I'm coming up with
the most epic D's Nuts joke. I'mgonna kill it. Oh, hey, Jevon. I
also have a package for you.It's D's Nuts.
Delivery confirmation signaturerequired, you little.
Josh Scramble (08:47):
Including rare discussion between broadcast a
listers Howard Stern and JimmyKimmel.
Howard Stern (08:51):
There are much worse clips than that. There are
much far there where he hisannoyance is very clear, and the
audience becomes veryuncomfortable.
Maybe I'll have, we'll track down all of the
where he's annoyed.
Josh Scramble (09:02):
That would be a
Howard Stern (09:03):
you know what? That would be a beautiful
tribute to Jerry and his genius.
Jerry Pancake (09:06):
So great. It's all angry.
Howard Stern (09:08):
Oh, yeah. He was very angry.
Jerry full of disdain. Well, I'm endlessly
fascinated by whypsychologically Jerry was so
angry, and, of course, it alwaysgoes back to your parents. You
can see just exactly Jerry'storture.
Well, Jerry, I think, also genuinely was a
genius. Like, you know, you're agenius applied to a lot of
people, but I think his personaprobably started to annoy him,
(09:30):
and then he had toovercompensate to show people
how smart he was.
And he's, you know, he's caught between I
wanna be the sex I wanna be the,you know, a guy who's attractive
to women, and then I wanna bethe buffoon.
Yeah. Although, I think he put a buffoon aside as
for except for occasional moment. Like, Jerry
was really a good guest on,Letterman. Oh, really? Yeah.
It's really it's really good.
(09:51):
Yeah. He was something else. He I he's one of
the most interesting people.
Josh Scramble (09:55):
Hear the full round table as well as a special
broadcast of the album, Dee'sNuts, this Sunday at noon, Jerry
Pancake, where have all the goodtimes gone? Only on WSBR, and
find Dee's Nuts wherever you getyour music.
(10:21):
WSBR Super Beach Radio, the number one station
between Rush and Ripley.
Elizabeth Benedict (10:27):
I'm actually okay if this goes on air.
Jerry Pancake (10:30):
Okay.
Elizabeth Benedict (10:30):
So there was one of those awesome music
things down at the beach.
Josh Scramble (10:36):
Mhmm. Like a DJJ.
Elizabeth Benedict (10:38):
Yeah. So I saw a dog, and he looked really
lost. I didn't see a whatever. Ithought I knew where he lived,
so I took him up to the housewhere I thought I knew. So,
apparently, I I I kidnapped adog.
(11:00):
Jesus.
Jerry Pancake (11:01):
And you gave it to the wrong person?
Elizabeth Benedict (11:03):
Wrong house. And I opened the door and put
the dog into the wrong house.
Jerry Pancake (11:08):
Oh, man. That's Jesus Christ. Wow.
Josh Scramble (11:12):
Yeah.
Jerry Pancake (11:12):
So how did those people react? They were like,
what the fuck? You just talkedto me
Josh Scramble (11:17):
in my house. I moved
Elizabeth Benedict (11:18):
I moved too fast. I didn't
Josh Scramble (11:20):
Like a ninja. I didn't
Elizabeth Benedict (11:21):
I didn't want them to
Jerry Pancake (11:22):
Have you ever admitted this to these people?
Elizabeth Benedict (11:25):
I'm actually trusting you with this. I'm
trying
Josh Scramble (11:27):
to Yeah. We're not Yeah. We're here.
Elizabeth Benedict (11:29):
Actually, you know what? The the people
don't know who I am, really.
Jerry Pancake (11:32):
No one can charge you with a crime for this. I
don't think
Elizabeth Benedict (11:35):
And by the way, if
Josh Scramble (11:36):
if you're still listening know, the dog
technically broke and entered.
Elizabeth Benedict (11:40):
And if you just were listening, I'm really
sorry. I was trying to do a goodthing.
Jerry Pancake (11:44):
Right? Get that dog home. That dog doesn't need
to be out at that stupid fuckingDJ party.
Josh Scramble (11:51):
I was confused.
I was confused.
Jerry Pancake (11:53):
The dog's probably scared. Right.
Fireworks going off. There'ssome guy or some lady with the
flames. They always have theflame lady.
Right?
Josh Scramble (12:02):
Did it burn. Yeah.
Jerry Pancake (12:06):
They're like the guys in the microphone. Like,
he's sucking the like, DJMarshmallow.
Elizabeth Benedict (12:13):
As Mark can serve out the dog.
Jerry Pancake (12:14):
And then somebody is gonna final you out there.
It's happened to me severaltimes.
Josh Scramble (12:19):
I've been to 3 of those things those things.
Jerry Pancake (12:22):
And, like, somebody walked up. Know. And I
don't know if it was a man or awoman. Tickle your jiggly bits.
Yes.
They did touch my dick.
Elizabeth Benedict (12:30):
It didn't matter. What?
Jerry Pancake (12:32):
Couple times or balls. Like, they got they got
some of it some of them. Yeah.That dog didn't wanna be at that
DJ party for sure, so you didhim a favor.
Josh Scramble (12:43):
Well, the thing about that DJ party was a little
it was a little rough.
Jerry Pancake (12:49):
Nobody nobody understands what dogs hear too,
so it could be excruciating onthe dog.
Josh Scramble (12:55):
Oh, sure it is. Is. Because if they hear
Elizabeth Benedict (12:56):
loud. Yeah. He was walking around, and I I
told my husband. I said, hey,I'm gonna take this dog home. He
goes, do you know where itlives?
And I said, I'm pretty sure
Josh Scramble (13:07):
I do.
Jerry Pancake (13:08):
Pretty sure. Pretty sure it's not
Josh Scramble (13:10):
a 100%. He said,
Elizabeth Benedict (13:11):
what if it's not the right house? And I said,
well, at least it's in a safehouse. And I've Here's the
thing. I love
Josh Scramble (13:19):
whoever I
Jerry Pancake (13:20):
think I just love that you
Josh Scramble (13:21):
like, their house was open and you my favorite
thing about this entire story.So it's a it's a
Elizabeth Benedict (13:27):
beautiful house. I'm really sorry whoever
Josh Scramble (13:29):
It's a Saturday summer night.
Jerry Pancake (13:31):
You have a beautiful home. You have a dog.
Elizabeth Benedict (13:33):
It's a compliment. I'm I I didn't want
that dog out.
Josh Scramble (13:36):
You know what? No one's that's why you lock your
doors in this neighborhood so noone compliments you as a dog.
Elizabeth Benedict (13:41):
Door is open. It's like, I'll take any
animal that's really worriedabout.
Josh Scramble (13:44):
That's what most of the that's that's like the
new single site. We'll take anyanimal.
Elizabeth Benedict (13:48):
I'll take it.
Jerry Pancake (13:49):
That is the flamingo at, like, 1 in the
morning. Any animal that wannasee.
Elizabeth Benedict (13:54):
Like, we all look out for. The
Josh Scramble (13:56):
thing I can't stop thinking about is it's a
beautiful summer Saturdayevening. You come home after a
nice lovely day with, you know,you had a great day at the
beach. You met some friends outat a nice lovely dinner. You had
a nice, you know, rose with yoursteak. You come home and all of
a sudden, like, like, what wasgoing on?
Why is there some random doghere? And then you walk in,
(14:17):
like, boom. There's a dog justlaying on your bed, like, hello.
And then 1, you have to realize,where is this dog? And then 2,
try to figure out where itbelongs.
Hopefully, it's your next doorneighbor.
Elizabeth Benedict (14:30):
I would love to hear from whoever owns that
dog.
Jerry Pancake (14:33):
Reach out to us, 219, at the, 29 dog find. No.
It's 2 it's 2 we actually have aphone number. 219 I'm sorry.
2004280.
Reach out to us here. And if youstill have the dog, good on you.
Josh Scramble (14:50):
Yeah. What if you have
Jerry Pancake (14:51):
the dog now, you're like,
Josh Scramble (14:52):
we're not we're not finding the original owner.
Yeah. I mean
Elizabeth Benedict (14:54):
if I'm the right owner, but I would love to
hear
Jerry Pancake (14:58):
The story. Yeah.
Josh Scramble (14:58):
Do you remember the house? Because I will
actually go interview thesepeople.
Elizabeth Benedict (15:02):
I do know the house.
Jerry Pancake (15:03):
On the street.
Elizabeth Benedict (15:03):
It's the
Josh Scramble (15:04):
one I will totally do this.
Elizabeth Benedict (15:06):
Time. It's like, oh, yeah. Let's do this.
And then the next day, it's like
Josh Scramble (15:10):
Alcohol. That's the that's the answer to that.
Alcohol.
Jerry Pancake (15:13):
So I would imagine that dog, like, if you
put it in that
Josh Scramble (15:17):
He was
Jerry Pancake (15:17):
so commercial
Josh Scramble (15:34):
talking to the wrong house. You were walking
down the street, and then youall those people you meet. You
saw a cool fish, and then youstuck me in the house. Now I am
on the loose, and I need to findthe house. Boom.
Jerry Pancake (15:46):
Yeah. Like, what a better ending for that dog
than just getting executed.
Elizabeth Benedict (15:51):
That's what I thought.
Josh Scramble (15:52):
Sarah McLaughlin has nothing on DJ Fuckface at
the beach.
Elizabeth Benedict (15:57):
I just want it to be home safe somewhere.
Jerry Pancake: Homesafesomewhere.com. (15:59):
undefined
Josh Scramble (16:02):
Would it have been something if, like, it was
a house full of cats and all ofa sudden these cats are
Jerry Pancake (16:05):
Oh, yeah. The cats are You fucking flipped the
fuck out.
Elizabeth Benedict (16:08):
Comment that that I did they
Josh Scramble (16:09):
put the
Elizabeth Benedict (16:10):
dog in that house. Don't
Jerry Pancake (16:12):
dog. Look like you really have a dog safe
house. Thanks.
Josh Scramble (16:16):
Meanwhile
Jerry Pancake (16:16):
Yeah. Thanks for leaving your door open. Now you
have some random ass dog in yourhouse.
Josh Scramble (16:21):
This looks like a good home. Look at the mailbox.
It's the Vic household. I'm surethey'll be really nice to that
dog.
Elizabeth Benedict (16:29):
I don't even I'm sorry for the whoever I put
that dog
Josh Scramble (16:34):
in your house. I'm so
Elizabeth Benedict (16:36):
sorry. I hope Not something
Josh Scramble (16:38):
you hear right, Jay. But I hope I hope it worked
out well.
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Small fry Sam, little Leopold,Oompa Woopa Larry, and all your
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Elizabeth Benedict (17:55):
Did you have fish tanks growing up?
Jerry Pancake (17:57):
Yeah. I did.
Elizabeth Benedict (17:58):
And? I
Jerry Pancake (17:59):
liked them. They're fine. Just something
else to do because we didn'thave fucking computers like you
kids.
Elizabeth Benedict (18:06):
What about furry animals?
Jerry Pancake (18:09):
I don't even wanna go into this. But
Elizabeth Benedict (18:11):
Next week?
Jerry Pancake (18:12):
No. We so our parents, wouldn't let us have
any animals, because well,guinea pigs. So they let us have
have the guinea pigs, and thenmy brother and I played catch
with 1 of the guinea pigs.Jesus. What the fuck?
Died.
Josh Scramble (18:29):
Yesterday.
Jerry Pancake (18:31):
Yeah. Like, we put it down the slide. We were,
like, playing with it. Becausewe really needed, like, a dog,
like a durable dog. Like adurable like, a big dog that's
durable.
My brother and I were, like,some ragamuffin 3 rascals kinda
shit, and we needed, like, a,like, a dog. But my fucking mom
(18:52):
got us guinea pigs, and thenthere's this little tiny
delicate things that we'refucking playing catch with them
because we're, you know, 4 and2.
Elizabeth Benedict (18:59):
Worse too.
Jerry Pancake (19:00):
Well, I mean, we didn't know. And so the guinea
pig died, and then we weren'tallowed after that to have any
pets, at all.
Josh Scramble (19:11):
Think that your parents really wouldn't let you
have pets
Elizabeth Benedict (19:14):
so bad.
Josh Scramble (19:14):
Or do you think the guinea pig was, like, a
trial pet, and you fucked thatup. So they're like, dude,
Jerry Pancake (19:20):
get us a like, a rottweiler or some shit. That's
what we needed, like a toughdog.
Elizabeth Benedict (19:24):
Sorry. No. I think they figured out real
quick that you can't haveanimals. So Because you're
playing catch with guinea pigs.
Josh Scramble (19:31):
So I thought Like, a ball
Elizabeth Benedict (19:34):
playing catch with a ball was
Jerry Pancake (19:35):
one thing. Put it down the slide.
Elizabeth Benedict (19:38):
That's that's a dog.
Josh Scramble (19:39):
But it wasn't a summer day when you put it down,
like, the scorching hot slide?
Jerry Pancake (19:42):
Yes. That was. And then
Josh Scramble (19:44):
So I thought you were gonna say that your parents
were gonna allow you to have onebecause they didn't want it.
Like, my parents, we never hadpets. My first pet, I was, like,
20 something because my dadnever wanted us to have to deal
with it dying.
Jerry Pancake (19:57):
Oh, well, that would be a sweet
Josh Scramble (19:58):
thing. Here's
Jerry Pancake (20:00):
To protect you from, but
Josh Scramble (20:01):
No. It's also inside story. He didn't wanna
have to get attached to it andalso wanna have to deal with it
dying. So
Jerry Pancake (20:07):
We know there's emotional problems.
Josh Scramble (20:09):
But, like, I was gonna ask that question, but I
think your parents realized wehave fuck up kids that are gonna
use a goddamn living thing as agoddamn football.
Jerry Pancake (20:16):
Anyway, because of this, we, we would round up
all the stray cats
Josh Scramble (20:23):
Oh, it was.
Jerry Pancake (20:25):
In the neighborhood, and we would put
them on leashes and then, like,Jesus Christ, and, like, chain
them up to a, like, a box or atree or whatever. You wiped the
cherry on
Josh Scramble (20:39):
the cats?
Jerry Pancake (20:40):
So they wouldn't leave us, because we liked like,
we had a
Elizabeth Benedict (20:44):
so much.
Jerry Pancake (20:46):
We didn't want him to leave, and our mother
said, oh, I'm definitely cactus.I'm definitely allergic to cats,
so you can't have cats in thehouse. So we wouldn't want them
to leave, so we tie them up inthe garage.
Josh Scramble (20:57):
Jerry, I'm never letting you in my house again
because I have cats, and I don'twant them We have
Jerry Pancake (21:02):
great cats. I don't I didn't kill the cats.
No. But We fed them and shit.What?
Josh Scramble (21:07):
Your name wasn't curiosity, was it? Because
Jerry Pancake (21:10):
we fed the cats and stuff. Like, there was a
Josh Scramble (21:13):
It's just the gerbils you had issues with.
Elizabeth Benedict (21:15):
So growing up growing up with the cats
There's
Josh Scramble (21:19):
so much in this. Like, I There's
Elizabeth Benedict (21:21):
so much. There's so much.
Josh Scramble (21:24):
I know. There's some there's a lot in this.
Jerry Pancake (21:27):
So there's a lot in in me.
Josh Scramble (21:29):
What age I have to at what age was the was it a
hamster or a gerbil?
Jerry Pancake (21:33):
It was a guinea pig. Oh, sorry. Guinea pig.
Josh Scramble (21:36):
3rd one.
Jerry Pancake (21:37):
So
Elizabeth Benedict (21:37):
Those are bigger.
Jerry Pancake (21:38):
They're bigger.
Josh Scramble (21:39):
Which is probably why they used it as a football
because they could palm it.Like, you know, like, the the
spine was kinda like the laces.
Jerry Pancake (21:45):
It was a it's a it's a terrible memory, man.
Like, I can remember when itbled from its nose.
Elizabeth Benedict (21:50):
And what
Josh Scramble (21:51):
made you do this again? Hang on. It bled from its
nose. So what? Did your brothernot catch it?
Oh
Elizabeth Benedict (21:55):
my god.
Jerry Pancake (21:56):
You might have dropped it.
Elizabeth Benedict (21:57):
Oh, could dude, you and why wait.
Josh Scramble (21:59):
Why did
Elizabeth Benedict (22:00):
we So
Josh Scramble (22:00):
you had a Chicago Bears receiver brother who
dropped her fucking guinea pig.
Elizabeth Benedict (22:04):
Oh, okay. So wait. You're playing catch with
it?
Josh Scramble (22:06):
Yeah.
Elizabeth Benedict (22:07):
Why again?
Jerry Pancake (22:08):
You're 4 into like, that's what you do.
Josh Scramble (22:13):
It's demented.
Elizabeth Benedict (22:14):
Maybe animals?
Jerry Pancake (22:15):
I mean, we didn't have a lot of toys. We didn't
have the Internet. Like, youfucks.
Josh Scramble (22:19):
So am I making the only connection here that
Jerry Pancake (22:22):
hang on. So We had a football somewhere, but we
maybe it was over the fence.
Elizabeth Benedict (22:26):
Play catch with an animal. Here.
Josh Scramble (22:27):
So I
Jerry Pancake (22:28):
think maybe that we thought the animal
Elizabeth Benedict (22:31):
No. You didn't.
Josh Scramble (22:31):
Well, let's let's really examine the Pancake
family line. Happening here.Your father knew several serial
killers, and that's usually atrait of them as they torture
small animals. So did hepossibly meet a 3rd and 4th
serial killer? I think Jerry'sdad is just really possibly meet
a 3rd and 4th serial killer?
I
Elizabeth Benedict (22:43):
think Jerry's dad
Josh Scramble (22:44):
is just really understanding. So, like, I
haven't started
killing yet.
Elizabeth Benedict (22:44):
Yet. Like
Jerry Pancake (22:45):
Yet. Maybe it's just the next career for me. But
Josh Scramble (22:56):
Well, you do.
Jerry Pancake (22:57):
I don't have three names in the that What is
Josh Scramble (23:00):
sort of a
Jerry Pancake (23:00):
middle name. George
Josh Scramble (23:02):
Cherry George Pancake. Yeah. No. That's not a
that's not a serial killer.Like, your name would have to
be, like
Jerry Pancake (23:08):
It has to be 2 first like, real first names.
Josh Scramble (23:11):
It would have to be, like, Jerry Sullivan pancake
because it's always a weirdmiddle of,
Jerry Pancake (23:16):
like, John Wilkes Booth. John Wilkes Booth. God,
what a what the fuck was thatguy's life like? Like, just like
Josh Scramble (23:26):
How fucked up are you when, like, there's no news
and you decide, I'm gonna gokill the president of the United
States or anything like that?
Jerry Pancake (23:33):
Too, Josh Scramble. I don't know if you
realize that.
Josh Scramble (23:35):
Because he jumped up. He was exploding Shakespeare
when he killed him. Like he
Jerry Pancake (23:40):
was acting in the community theater
Josh Scramble (23:43):
or whatever.
Jerry Pancake (23:43):
Speaker 1 (1h
Josh Scramble (23:43):
45m 20s)
Jerry Pancake (23:49):
Could you imagine if, like, someone I'm not saying
anyone would do this from theMiller Community Theater. And by
the way, shout out to the MillerCommunity Theater. Please visit
them as well as at the, MarshallJ Gardner Center.
Josh Scramble (24:03):
Well, I don't see Steven going full presidential
assassination.
Jerry Pancake (24:07):
But just think about it. Like, if someone was
like, I'm a thespian, and I'vedone 2 plays at the Miller
Community Theater, and I'm gonnago kill Joe Biden. Like, that is
what John John Wilkes Booth is.It's like he he was like, I'm
going for it all. I might notmake it as an actor, but I'm
(24:28):
gonna kill the fuckingpresident.
And I would argue he's just asfamous as Abraham Lincoln. You
ever seen my 8th grade picture?
Elizabeth Benedict (24:38):
No. Have you seen
Jerry Pancake (24:38):
my black I'm a black fella in that picture.
Josh Scramble (24:42):
Are you, like You
Elizabeth Benedict (24:42):
mean you're a dark complexion?
Josh Scramble (24:44):
So did you use No.
Jerry Pancake (24:45):
I have a Afro. I am full on. I will show it
Josh Scramble (24:49):
to you. Like Art Garfunkelfro?
Jerry Pancake (24:51):
It was a Jufro kind of. Ju Jufro.
Josh Scramble (24:54):
Jufro.
Jerry Pancake (24:55):
Yeah. It was very tight. And so my mother did my
hair at the time, and I contendto this day that she gave me a
perm right, but like, rightbefore picture day because
Josh Scramble (25:09):
my hair doesn't last this long.
Jerry Pancake (25:10):
Hair was like this.
Elizabeth Benedict (25:12):
It doesn't last this long.
Josh Scramble (25:13):
All the time. I got $20 saying he got the perm
because he threw the guinea pig.
Jerry Pancake (25:19):
That was years later. But my mom probably never
forgave me for that. Right? Shewas like, oh, that kid is a
serial
Elizabeth Benedict (25:26):
forgave you for that.
Jerry Pancake (25:27):
Well, he's dead. So
Elizabeth Benedict (25:29):
Still, he's still haunting your dream.
Jerry Pancake (25:31):
But then my grandmother got us a rabbit
after that.
Josh Scramble (25:34):
Be something like you know how everyone has those
mysterious noises in theirhouse? Like, wouldn't it be
something if it was the ghost ofthe guinea pig?
Elizabeth Benedict (25:41):
That's so real, though.
Jerry Pancake (25:44):
It could be. It could happen here. There's so
many things that scare me.
Josh Scramble (25:50):
You know, wouldn't be surprised if it
animals.
Elizabeth Benedict (25:53):
I've never abused animals.
Jerry Pancake (25:54):
Didn't. It was I was a child.
Elizabeth Benedict (25:56):
So was I. I've never abused animals.
Alright.
Josh Scramble (25:59):
Not to
Elizabeth Benedict (25:59):
make you feel bad, but
Josh Scramble (26:00):
Judgey. You should feel bad.
Elizabeth Benedict (26:01):
I'm gonna make you feel bad.
Jerry Pancake (26:03):
Judge Benedict over here.
Josh Scramble (26:05):
Well well, by by her namesake, she does play both
sides. Thanks again, everyone,for listening, and remember
to add this show to your favorites. New episodes
drop every other week and areavailable wherever you get your
pods.
And also feel free
to review us on your listening platform.
And also remember to shop at socoolshirts.com, the
place to be vocal and shoplocal.
Elizabeth Benedict (26:27):
All you guys do is just sit up there and talk
about how fucking cool you are.
Josh Scramble (26:32):
WSBR Super Beach rig. In the morning madhouse.
Talking all that crazyenergized, pancake and a
scramble. Audio breakfast withyour favorite eyes.
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