Miller Morning Madhouse S2E1: Heavy Uncles, Moshpits, and Goth T!ts...

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Jen Pancake (00:00):
All you guys do is just sit up there and talk about

(00:01):
how fucking cool you are.

Josh Scramble (00:05):
WSBR Super Beach Radio.

Jerry Pancake (00:08):
Do you like your music, Heavy?

Madam Moan and Madhouse. Talking all that crazy
and a jive. Pancake and thescramble. Audio breakfast with
your favorite guys.

(00:42):
Hello, and welcome back to the Miller
Morning Madhouse, your favoritepodcast from the 04/2003. And
welcome to season two of theMiller Morning Madhouse. That
intro was a little bit heavierof music than we usually like to
go,
but is
in reference to today's subject of seeing the
Sonic Temple Far Day Long HeavyMetal and Hard Rock Festival

(01:02):
that I went to recently and thecraziness that ensued. But
before we get today's episode,we need to give a shout out to
some of our sponsors. off,Miller Community Theater,
producing their next show, theMad Woman's Late Night Cabaret.
Shows will be July, and thenagain, the eighteenth and
nineteenth, and July 20 for amatinee. Tickets will be going

(01:25):
on sale soon.
Be sure to take a look for that,as well as the new website
that'll be coming from theMillwood Community Theater. So
cool shirts, the place to shoplocal, be vocal, dropping new
designs daily. In fact, I amwearing one of the most recent
additions, my Eagleman shirt.And just like Eagleman, we've
got something for you. Today'sepisode is gonna be a two
parter.

(01:45):
The next part will be droppingnext week. All that being said,
let's get to our show.

Welcome everybody to season two of the Miller
Morning Madhouse. I am JerryPancake with my brother Josh
David Scramble here for seasontwo. And?

Jenny Pancake?

From the block.

Of pancakes.

Yeah. From the pancake block that we live on.

From the pancake block. Where do

I live We are back for

We're back.

More Miller Beach madness here. I've taken a
little creative hiatus is what,my AI is telling you.

Slash mental breakdown.

Yeah. Or complete yeah. Complete breakdown.
However you put it in your inpsychologist or psychiatrist
terms.

Potato potato.

Or therapist, whatever. But we are back, and
we're happy to be back. And,we're gonna be talking about
some things Miller related. Andbut Josh Josh Scramble has some
stories from the road Oh, yes.

We're gonna

go into Scramble took a road trip, and it was
quite quite unique. Fun, butunique. So what was going on?
Was the occasion? What was theevent?

So my one of my best friends from high school
said, hey, do you wanna go wewanted to go see Metallica last
year at Soldier Field, doing thetwo shows, but I also did not
wanna drop $800 on decent seats.Too Future everything sucks
segment, ticket prices. Howmuch? 800 for one ticket? So,

(03:42):
was technically two showsbecause they're Metallica's
doing like that.
We do two dates, like a Fridayand a Sunday, and they are two
separate shows. But to getdecent seats, it was gonna be
like several $100 a ticket pernight.

I'm not in. I'll just watch a video on the
YouTube.

On the YouTube, so

And by that, he means he will not watch that
video.

I will watch five minutes of it, and be bored
Done. And turn something elseon.

So that we let that pass because, you know,
we're not I'm not on a budget,but I don't wanna drop half a
paycheck just to go see Metalki,even though they were fucking
phenomenal. I mean, awesome.

They are old now, but Shit. They've been doing

this shit for, like, forty five years.

But they are still, all reports say, good.

I would absolutely recommend them. If
you were a Metallica fan at all,go see them live if you have not
already. It was my Metallicashow. But anyway, so Well,

that's shocking.

If you're I'm not a big concert goer.

Oh, okay.

I, like, have to really wanna see something,
which is Same. Which is half thereason I had such the experience
that I do.

It feels really hard to part with that money.

It's not even that. I just don't

like concert

going friends, which there are many.

Yeah. Like, god bless you. I'm just not a big
fan of crowds.

That's mainly it, or lines.

Not many lines,

the line.

So we went to Sonic Temple, which is a hard
rock, heavy metal festival inColumbus, Ohio.

Beautiful town of Columbus,

It seemed like a nice little downtown. It was
quiet. Cute. Yeah. So, we go.
We had a very nice dinner at asteakhouse the night before, me
and my friend and his brother,put a few drinks down the
gullet, and then, you know, wewoke up the next morning and
went to experience Sonic Temple.

Oh, the okay. So this is the whole festival.

Oh, it's a four day

Four day? What?

It's like Who are you?

It's a

It's a Woodstock ninety nine situation, Josh
Scramble. Did you have to walkin poop at any time?

I avoided poop.

This is new.

Did you burn anything? I let light anything
on fire. No. I did not. What wasthe titty count?

Bare, not many. And the and which is funny,
kinda leads us to the point,like

Well, now I'm interested.

So there

There is a titty count, at least.

There there definitely was a titty non bear,
but there was a titty count. Butand I hope we don't offend
anyone, but if you are a hardrock, heavy metal female music
fan, there are two types, andthere is no differ. You are
either smoking hot or smokingnot. Like, there

That's a good scale. There is too much

going between. You're either

remember that thing on the Internet where you
would just was just like twobuttons, hot or not, and it
would just keep showing youpictures. You ever do that?

Yeah. I could I could have ranked everybody at
this concert very quickly.

That's how you get viruses.

I spent, like

Well, also going to Sonic Temple, some of

the holidays I spent. Also also viruses.

If you're if you created the hot or not and you
are still out there, you'restill alive or whatever, and you
listen to this podcast, bring itback. I thought it was Mark
Zuckerberg. He

did it, but like

No. There was a website just called Hot

Orna. He didn't invent it, but he definitely did
it, like, on a local

Oh, he stole it?

Yes. Like everything else. Yes.

Anyway, go

back to your story. So, yeah, there are two
forms of female metal fans.Either you're smoking hot or
you're smoking not, andobviously, some have mirrors,
some don't.

Oh. Oh.

Because I mean, there were some women there that
are like, okay, you've got thebody and the attitude to pull
off what you're wearing, andthen there were the winner crown
jewel of like, you are not hotand should not be wearing that.
We are walking out of theconcert at the end of the night,
and she is wearing a full on,like, fishnet body stocking with

(07:45):
a thong and bra, and that's it.Woah. Not which on some people
Okay.

Maybe. Good. Not when

you're like three hundred pounds and five'six.

Oh, well.

But she was you know, I will give her her body
positivity was on 10, and herbody appearance was on, like, a
one. But you're

Is that really a, like, a a heavy metal outfit?
Like, would that would one seethat

Well, also, need to do clarify.

One see that in, say, I don't know, the aughts or
whenever you were in highschool?

There is a great equalizer to this is the fact
that ICP was playing also. Sothe Juggalos.

Oh, yeah. The Juggalos. The Juggalos were
Juggalos. Juggalos. Some of myfavorite people, by the way.

Let me just say I

can't believe there were the titty count is zero
then.

Yeah. They're those Juggalos are like a
renaissance renaissance fair oftits.

I wanted to people watch the Juggalos, but
they were also playing the sametime as Metallica on a different
stage. So I chose Metallica overJuggalos.

Schedule that.

Smart people because there were 50,000 people
at this festival. Wow. So I

mean Juggalos don't play good with other

But a Juggalo did have the quote of the night for
me. We're walking out because soit's a old college football
stadium and the, you know, theherd is just making their way to
the parking lots. And I heardsome some juggle you could tell
he was a Juggalo say, dude, wedon't even have to shower. We're
covered in Phago.

Oh, man. Oh, well, there

you go.

They have Phago at the

I I mean, I just think if you're in an ICP
concert or Fago or whatever. Orpass

it out. Okay. I didn't know that was part of the
culture.

Part of the ticket price.

But I I could see, like, that Juggalos and
Renaissance fair people are thesame people.

Oh, it's the same people.

Huge ass titty ladies.

Different outfit.

Yeah. Just a different outfit.

I I don't think any of that.

I've never seen bigger tits than a Renaissance
fair ever in my life.

To a Renaissance fair.

Been to one, walked around

ye olde juggalo. Actually, hang on.

Ye olde Jerry Patton cake over at the
Renaissance fair.

I just thought of the best name for a Renaissance
Juggalo porn star. Yee old Yeeold Juggalo.

I mean, yeah, there should be more Renaissance
porn out there.

There's an audience for every porn.

Madam, you like old stuff. I like old stuff.

Mark Zuckerberg,

don't steal that from us.

Well, not listening. Like one woman
getting screwed in the stocks.

Yeah. Like,

I don't know, man. People dig that shit. I
never have that fantasy. A bigturkey leg, somebody fucking a
lady with a big turkey leg,eating a big turkey leg now,
like, while he's banging.

Wow. Wow. Alright. Alright.

Setting a big, I don't know, mead on the lady's
back.

Mead? Mead. Yeah. I don't

think they do the mead coming

to coming to a video on demand now. Meads and
Meads. Meads and Meads.

Meads Meads and Meads.

Meads and Meads Meads and Maidens. I don't know.
That could be a new bar on LakeStreet. Meads and Maidens. Yeah.
Yeah. You know, they'll do likea renaissance hang night.

WSBR Super Beach Radio, the best station between
Rush and Ripley. We love playingmusic, but right now, we have to
pay some bills.
Do you have a heavy metal concert to go to,

(11:25):
but nothing to wear while we'vegot you covered? At Matt's Metal
Barq, we have clothing for alltaste. Whether you wanna hide
everything in super baggy garbor show everyone your jiggly
bits, we have everything underthe sun you can want. Assless
chaps, body stockings, bandshirts, nipple tape, mohawk
glue, and everything in between.And don't forget to check out
our new piercing parlor becauseyou know what we say in that

(11:47):
metal pocket.
If you can pinch it, we willpierce it. Come visit us at 8150
US Highway 20 in Shipsawanaright through the Amish
Furniture Store.
Rock on.
WSBR Super Beach Radio.

Alright. Wait. Go through

the lineup. So who were

oh, gee. There were so, like, there were so
many p there are so many bands.There's like a 100 bands over
the four days.

See more than I or you you saw Metallica, but who
else?

So I and also I wrote

Were you there for all four days? God, no.

Are you fucking kidding me? I thought you were
camping out. No.

We went we we went

Those outhouses after day four. We

went Friday only.

Oh, so day,

the day.

Okay. day.

It started Thursday, ended Sunday. We went
for Friday night.

Porta potties, or did they have those nice trucks?

So we paid a $100 extra for, like, the elevated
truck porta potties that arelike They charge you? It was a
VIP package. So, like, we hadour own separate tent, entrance,
better, like, our dedicatedvendors, dedicated bathrooms.

It's the only way to go.

Fucking capitalism. Just Jerry. Fucking
charge you to go to thebathroom. No.

You fucking charge people. It wasn't just
for the bathroom, but it wasworth every single Everything's
I'm sure.

Yeah. Those bathrooms are nice.

Yeah. Compared to a portable shitter? Yes. So we
went our three bands we went tosee were Alice Cooper, Rob
Zombie, and Metallica wereheadlining. There

was Amazing lineup.

So there were so many bands there, but like, the
the one stage, it started atnoon. We got there at like 11:30
because we heard nightmaresabout the day before about like,
hey, make sure you get thereearly to get your seats, and
like, what else do we have todo? So we walk in, and they
start at noon. And the band hasa couple of younger guys, and

(13:44):
then this big fat, excuse me,big fat, like, uncle looking,
he's three hundred pounds.

Fat uncle?

Jeans, denim vests, no shirt, gut hanging
out, and like the bald, like,bald on top, a ring around the
sides. Approximate age,

our age.

You said fat uncle, Jerry.

I would say late forties would be my guess.

Oh, that's a rough. He's going he's going bad
soon. But the funny thing

and trust me, judging on the amount of people
there that I saw with this,there's gonna be a lot of
diabetes diagnosis comingquickly.

That's not real heavy metal though. It's like,
oh, how can you rock when youhave the diabetes? It's gonna be
really difficult. Right?

Just maybe

Metallica will be like the next Wilford Brimley in
the diabetes commercials.

He would

be like He was a guitarist, I think.

I'm Lars Ulrich, and I have diabetes.

He works he works way too hard, but mean, drums to
have diabetes, but

But people don't get diabetes.

But the funny thing is, like

Oh, yeah. They do. He starts, and

I'm like, okay. Like, let's listen to some hard
and I realized where on thespectrum I am, like, on heavy
metal fans, I dabble. Like, Ilike some harder bands, but for
the most part, it's a few andfar between. The five hours was
nothing but, like, peoplesinging like, no way or it's

(15:10):
just That

sounds about right.

And then the stage where they're like we
called it the I play in a bandwith my uncle stage, because
even the next one, it was abunch of old guys rocking out,
are they not making new metalplayers? Because I saw a lot of
dudes about to get their AARPcards.

So, you didn't recognize any of

the band names? Fuck no.

Okay. All So,

once it got into the evening, I recognized some
names, like Suicidal TendenciesWas Playing.

Okay.

Oh, man.

There was a lot of them. I mean, there were so
many bands on the side.

It was like a Woodstock.

It was totally a Woodstock for metal fans.

Metal Church? You ever hear of them?

I have heard of them. I don't think I

think they're all dead.

They might be.

And The Mentors was one of my favorite.

So we start, and I'm like, I have zero favorites.

Okay. They they were a rape rock band. Did they
have a rape rock stage?

Rape rock?

No.

Yeah. So weirdly.

Yeah. They talked about, one of their biggest
hits, suck and fucking cook andclean. Oh. Yeah. They're very
popular back in the

So the weirdest thing Hades. Pre me too.

There's a theory about the mentors that, El Duce,
the, lead singer, killed KurtCobain. It's a whole thing.
We'll go into it in anotherepisode.

Or not.

Yeah. That's that's a way different set

of Courtney Love hired him supposedly. But the
thing he killed himself as So

the thing that amazed me at the end of the
night, I spent twelve hours atthis thing.

Oh my god.

By the time we I'm out,

aren't Oh,

yeah. That's a full shift. That's overtime.

Oh,

yeah. Double But

40 to 50,000 people, I didn't see anyone
getting into fights. I didn'tsee security taking anybody
down. I didn't see anyonecausing a lot of shit. Now, it
might have happened. I justdidn't see it.
Right. But I was at the mainstage all day long in this
venue, just a bunch of peoplewho wanted, you know, rock the

fuck That's because they got all the rid of
all the immigrants.

Oh, no. There were immigrants. Definitely
there.

What about there any

oh, we there's a So no fights. Oh,

no. There was mosh pits, for sure.

But there was no fighting as a result

of mosh No. I totally expected, like, you
know, six, 7PM rolls around, thedrugs and the booze are gonna
start hitting and someone's

Twelve hours is a stretch.

Someone's gonna be like Someone's gonna break.
Fucking go. Oh, and, you know,it's gonna be nothing but blood
and meth teeth flying. And Ididn't see any of that. But no.
But mosh pits, they're no longerreally mosh pits as, like, a Gen
X or older would know them.Like, it used to just be a
circle where you would go in,bounce around, start punching,
kicking, and then get kickedout.

Sometimes people would lift you up and put you
through the

That's still happening. Like, the crowd
surfing thing, definitely stillthing, but the mosh pit has
modified into what I call thedonut of destruction. Now, to
get a and we were up high. Solike, we want a good visual of
the stage. So we're like at 200level seating in a football
stadium, but like, probably atwhat would be considered the 30

(18:22):
yard line.
So we want a good vantage pointof everything, and all day, I
could see these mosh pits justgoing around, but it's very new.
So it's like 50 feet wide.

50 feet wide.

With people, like, running in a circle and
kind of, like, elbows are kindof flying around, and they're
going in a circle, and I was sofascinated all day long.

Are they going as fast as they can? It's I would
say Are they going around incircles?

They are going around

They shouldn't be running that much. Like, was
said, if these people are in badcondition, like, they're those
are performers.

These are the listeners.

I know. But you said, like

Performers had diabetes.

Oh, okay.

Yeah. The performers. So These are maybe
some youngsters

that identified are definitely

of a time.

Some rage.

A lot of 30. A couple thirties, maybe a
forties, if you're lucky.

Because probably their parents were listening to
this music and it somehow

Probably, it yeah. Went through a generation.
But anyway, so they start, like,a heavy jog, and then just
start,

like A heavy jog.

For the whole concert. I mean, like, the whole
show,

like It's good workout.

40. So I was like, all I could think of is,
like, there's gonna be a ton oftorn ACLs going on in this, but
I was also in the old person. Idon't give a fuck about that
shit. I just wanna listen tosome shows.

Your bones were softer back then.

So What does that mean?

You're you're more made of rubber.

You could you could do, like, sliding

down a a tibula or whatever and, like

A fibula?

What is it? Tibia and fibula.

Tibia. Tibia. I said a fibula.

You did.

Oh, that could be a bone in

the future, thing. Like, so you have the
circle, and it's mostly thecircle, but then at times, like,
there's a group in the middle ofit, which is why I called it the
donut of destruction, becausethere's the laps going around,
and
then there's people in the middle, and I
thought
at well, maybe they just got stuck there.

They didn't realize they were in the middle of the
doughnut.

But then I asked my friend, and he's like, no. I
think they're kinda keepingorder to, like, the doughnut.

What if they have to go to the bath what if you
have to go to the bathroom?

So the doughnut doesn't collapse in

on Exactly. Like, it's it's not a black hole.

It'll really turn into an

actual I mean, I don't know where they got this.

I don't it it seemed like a more peaceful mosh
pit, but the ones there was abig fat guy at one point who
just jumped in the jogging andwas walking and totally screwing
up the entire pace. And likepeople are knocking off at him,
and he

didn't Man, you're not going fast.

He did give one fuck. Zero fucks were given by
this guy. But then at one point,and this was another fascinating
thing, there's this guy comingup, and he's like, this size way
more metal than you guys. That'swhy the stage teams have come up
their game. And I'm like, okay.
Like, are we just endorsing fivemonths now?

What's the qualification of

So they were there was it was bigger, faster,
and more people, it was thejustification. So when

Why are you having a contest of this
horrible I don't like mosh pits.I mean, I don't like anything.

No. You don't like anything?

I don't like anything anyway, but like a mosh
pit.

Actually, I might

like are sweaty. I used to love the mosh punching
each other.

That sounds crazy, but

I did.

Seems like there's a lot of people in
there, and you like a lot ofpeople.

Certainly never gonna get up on the crowd
surfing, though.

You can yes, but feel free to Google it.

I don't trust people to push, like, carry me
No.

But so at one point, the mosh pit's going, and
then this guy who was alsotalking shit like this side's
better than this one goes over,and he's like puts up like this
prayer symbol, and I'm like,what the fuck is going on? And
then all these people stop. AndI thought he was like gonna
point someone out like someonewas in trouble. Oh, no, no, no,
no. And then all of a sudden,like this like the Red Sea or
the Dead Sea or whatever the seawas that Moses did.

(22:02):
The Dead Sea. These peopleparted.

You wouldn't need to part that because it's right?
Is there water

in there? Was it the

Red Sea?

I don't know.

It was the Red Sea. So anyway That's not
important.

All these people Jesus. These people, like, go to
the side, and then I was like,wow. Like, what was he doing?
Like, is someone hurt, or is hecalling out someone? No.
Then he goes, like, kinda putshis hands together, and all of
sudden, these two people, likeBraveheart, just start running
at each other,

and then like right. That would have been
cool.

It's called the wall of death. Like a joust.

Wall of death? No.

It's like 50 people on one side, 50 people on
another, just running at eachother like an old battle.

Oh my gosh. Now that sounds

People are gonna have to Google this.

That sounds like something that I recall. Because
what I called it when Iexperienced this very thing was
it was like Red Rover only withviolence.

Oh, this this is Red Rover with

Red Rover is kind of violent even if you die. You
say everybody over.

It sounds like that squid game.

No. No. Where they try

to kill each other for the But this is just
Just for fun?

This is just good, clean fun.

It it was just good, clean fun.

So why do you get dressed up in your in your
fishnet bodysuit to go slamsomebody in a death run?

I don't know. She

might have just been hanging Well,

we saw her at the end of the night. She was a
complete surprise. Like, she waslike, I thought I had my okay.
This was the you shouldn't havebeen wearing that winner of the
day, and then she came along andwent like, well done, ma'am. You
took it at the last Hold

my beard.

Yeah. Hold my beard. Or hang on. Hold my
Faego.

Hold my Faego.

What about feathered hair? Is that still

No. Really? There there was no real, like, stuff
in

the that was coming back, though, for a bit.

Wait. If it was, I didn't see it.

I know this is back for but do you consider yourself
a Gen Xer?

More than I do.

Know you're the trivia master, so you probably
know the exact

He's an old soul. So technically, a technically,
I'm a millennial because theystarted naming that for people
who graduated in the newmillennium, and I was the of

Oh, god.

Yeah. But also, there's a big movement to have
the generation between like 82and 89 renamed because we're in
like a between. Yeah. And Idon't wanna be a millennial
because I don't share theirthoughts and No. Like, ethics.

I do think there should be a different

Yeah. You don't do as much butt stuff probably
as they do because they like,with you. Mainly butt stuff.

The rumors of butt stuff is have been highly
exaggerated.

Well, I don't know. I that's

It's a

good way not to get pregnant, guys.

And But a strong way to get pink eye.

Hey. If Indiana outlaws birth birth

control escapade.

If Indiana outlaws birth control, just fuck
her in the butt. That's all yougotta do. You won't ever have a
baby. I can assure you that'snot fake news.

Indiana, home of the number two option. Yeah.

The number two option. It's like plan b, but
it's just number two.

Well, it technically is a plan b. Plan b.
For but. For for bowels.

C is for but. Plan b. Wow. How did this get

Boy, I really

I'm really good at sidetracking the
conversation.

But it also makes a great point, like I was
saying, you're either hot or notif you're a metal female fan.
Something also tells me youeither like to fuck or you don't
if you're a female fan.

Lot of butt stuff going on Oh, I get after that
show.

On the next Milo Moni Madhouse.

My friend has to take a shit really bad. He's
like, he'll pay anything.

That is it for our inaugural episode of season
two. Tune in next week to hearthe conclusion of the epic Sonic
Temple voyage, journey,massacre, whatever you wanna
call it. Hope to see you soonand keep on rocking on.

All Episodes

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

Stuff You Should Know

Dateline NBC

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Miller Morning Madhouse S2E1: Heavy Uncles, Moshpits, and Goth T!ts...

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

.css-r6mb8g{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:1;overflow:hidden;}Stuff You Should Know

Dateline NBC

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

All Episodes

Miller Morning Madhouse S2E1: Heavy Uncles, Moshpits, and Goth T!ts...

Stuff You Should Know