Episode 42 – Coming To Terms With Change (ft. Abe Lopez)

In Episode 42 of the VulnerABILITY Podcast, host Marisa Donnelly interviews previous co-host Abe Lopez on loneliness, isolation in quarantine, and coming to terms with change in a post-COVID world.

Highlights From The Episode:

[2:00] “My mental health really relied solely on spending time with people. It’s something that gave me life and still does… When I stopped doing that, I needed to find a way to come and balance myself out.”

[4:20] “To some extent, we can kind of make adjustments. But in the area of mental health, you can’t just do that… It really takes a toll on our day-to-day everything.”

[4:45] “It’s [mental health struggles] is something that a lot of people are feeling, but not a lot of people are talking about, especially on social media.”

[6:00] “The world is such a bigger place than I will ever understand. Because people are so different and they vary from culture to culture, demographic to demographic..and when you take that all away, in like a weekend, it becomes very difficult to motivate yourself.”

[6:15] “I didn’t have any motivation to want to read a book, to want to workout, to want to do all these things. It’s crazy because now would be the perfect time.”

[7:05] “It’s wonderful if you can take a break and just relax, but what if you’re in an environment that doesn’t support that? Or that is toxic? Or unhealthy? Or just, you know, you don’t feel like you can be yourself? Or you’re alone?”

[7:50] “It’s really hard when you’re by yourself or when you feel isolated to get back into your ‘normal’ headspace. And that’s not a bad thing; it’s not wrong. It’s a very human thing.”

[8:50] “When it just stopped, it almost seemed as though I had all the time in the world but no idea of what to do with it.

[9:10] “Everything shut down and I had all the time in the world to do what I want but the thing is, now I have no motivation to do it… It’s a weird paradox to find yourself in.”

[10:05] “We’re not being truthful about our emotions because we feel guilty for having them. And that’s just wrong.”

[10:50] “We’re all our own worst enemies, but realistically, we’re all fighting our own battles of varying degrees.”

[11:20] “It’s okay to feel whatever you’re feeling. We have to give ourselves permission to feel it [emotions], even if we feel like this is stupid.”

[13:05] “Every single day it’s not just a matter of staying home, it’s a matter of waking up every single day and realizing that you’re not living the life that you once were, and you have to come to terms with that.”

[15:05] “When this all shifted, it really made me actually take a step back and realize how much I was emptying my cup by always going and doing all of these things. It was taking all of my energy away from things that I didn’t even know it was taking away from… I was always going to these different places and busying myself to the point that I didn’t really make time for me, I didn’t really make time for tasks on my to-do list, or certain friendships.”

[16:40] “I need to be really intentional virtually, and in person, and show up for the people who need me and let them show up for me as well in ways that I didn’t do before.”

[19:20] “There [are] little things that I miss, but there [are] little things that I’ve come to appreciate more right now.”

[23:05] “It sucks that we can’t physically do that [get coffee] but I think there’s a lot of things to be excited about in the way that we can create our own ways to make those meaningful moments.”

[23:35] “We’re physically apart and we can’t do the same social things or make those exact same connections, but we can still invest in each other. We can still care about each other. We can still make this time meaningful and offer one another support, even when it’s hard.”