May 11, 2023 • 42 mins
Hi Friends,
Joining me today is Tina Wells. I invited her on the show to talk about Her new book, The Elevation Approach; which she wrote after experiencing burnout. As you can see from Tina’s impressive accomplishments you can begin to understand why she needed to create a better sense of harmony in her life.
✅Named Essence’s 40 Under 40
✅Author of over 20 books
✅Academic Director for Wharton’s Leadership in the Business World Program at U of Penn
✅Founder of Buzz Marketing Group, an agency she founded at age 16 with clients like Dell, The Oprah Winfrey Network, Kroger, Apple, P+G, J & J, and American Eagle….to name a few.
During our conversation we talked about:
Tina walks us through her four-phase plan: Preparation, Inspiration, Recreation, and Transformation, and shares actionable strategies that apply universally regardless of the season of life you are in.
Special thanks to our sponsor for this weeks episode, Denise Albright who has a suite of products designed to help make organizing fun and functional! Visit denisealbright.com and enter code SIMPLY30 to receive 30% off your entire order!
XOXO-
Laurie
CONNECT WITH TINA
WEBSITE | INSTAGRAM
TINA’S BOOK RECOMMENDATIONS:
GOOD TO GREAT
EVERYTHING IS FIGUREOUTABLE
Joining me today is Tina Wells. I invited her on the show to talk about Her new book, The Elevation Approach; which she wrote after experiencing burnout. As you can see from Tina’s impressive accomplishments you can begin to understand why she needed to create a better sense of harmony in her life.
✅Named Essence’s 40 Under 40
✅Author of over 20 books
✅Academic Director for Wharton’s Leadership in the Business World Program at U of Penn
✅Founder of Buzz Marketing Group, an agency she founded at age 16 with clients like Dell, The Oprah Winfrey Network, Kroger, Apple, P+G, J & J, and American Eagle….to name a few.
During our conversation we talked about:
- What burnout looks like in American culture.
- How decluttering is one of the first principles she talks about in her book
- Why burnout is not limited to the workplace
- The impact of burnout on the “sandwich generation”
- How to begin to re-think accomplishments and success
Tina walks us through her four-phase plan: Preparation, Inspiration, Recreation, and Transformation, and shares actionable strategies that apply universally regardless of the season of life you are in.
Special thanks to our sponsor for this weeks episode, Denise Albright who has a suite of products designed to help make organizing fun and functional! Visit denisealbright.com and enter code SIMPLY30 to receive 30% off your entire order!
XOXO-
Laurie
CONNECT WITH TINA
WEBSITE | INSTAGRAM
TINA’S BOOK RECOMMENDATIONS:
GOOD TO GREAT
EVERYTHING IS FIGUREOUTABLE
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Welcome to This Organized Life. Ifyou're a mom, wife, or coffee
lovers seeking advice on how to reduceclutter and reclaim time, look no further
than your host, Laurie Palau,Founder Simply Be Organized, an author of
hot Mess, a practical guide togetting organized. For a lot of people,
clutter is their dirty little secret,but it doesn't have to be.
Each week, we will share practicaltips, chat with experts, and provide
(00:23):
strategies on how to keep you organized. I hope that by sharing our stories
you feel a little less alone andmore empowered to tackle the areas that are
holding you back. So let's getstarted. Hi everybody, and welcome to
today's episode of This Organized Life podcast. I am your host, Laurie Palau,
(00:45):
and I am so that you're here. Before we get into today's episode,
I just want to give a hugeshout out to everyone out there to
say thank you for all the positivefeedback that we've been getting on our new
Monday drop of the week. Soif this is your first time tuning in,
we have been for years doing ourreleasing all of our episodes on Thursdays,
(01:07):
and they've been our long form episodeslike the one you're about to hear
with amazing guests. But we realizethat not everybody has a full forty five
minutes and sometimes we just need alittle extra boost and inspiration, and so
we recently last month started dropping theseadditional bonus episodes on Mondays and we're calling
them Tip of the Week. They'reshort, like ten minute episodes, which
(01:30):
is one little nugget of inspiration foryou, something to think about, something
that you can practically implement in yourlife. And you guys are loving it.
We're getting such great response, sothank you so much. Make sure
that you click the subscribe button,share it with a friend, all the
things. It really just helps getour show out in front of other people,
and so we really appreciate it.Now back to today's episode. So
(01:55):
we, like I said, loveto bring on guests of all different walks
of life, from all different industriesand have all different perspectives. And I
have an amazing guest that I can'twait to learn from today. I'm actually
going to read you a little bitabout it. I don't normally read bios,
but this bios pretty impressive, soI'm going to read it. So
joining me today is Tina Wells sowhen I'm about to rattle off Tina's accomplishments,
(02:21):
You're going to be like, really, She's been in essences forty under
forty. She's the author of overtwenty books. She's the academic director for
Wharton's Leadership in the Business World Programat University of Pennsylvania, which is not
that far from me. She's thefounder of Buzz Marketing Group, an agency
(02:42):
that she founded at wait for it, age sixteen with clients like bell Oprah
Winfrey, Network, Kroeger, Applep and g J and j An American
Eagle. But I invited her onthe show to talk about her new book,
which is called The Elevation Approach.And what I love about this book
is at talks about how she integratespersonal and professional ambitions, values and responsibilities
(03:06):
through this four phase plan. Andwe're going to talk about the four phase
plan is preparation, inspiration, recreation, and transformation. We're going to dig
into all the things. But again, Tina is just walks the walk,
talks the talk, and I said, we just got to have you on
the show. So without further ado, let me welcome Tina Wells to the
(03:27):
show. Welcome Tina, Hi,Laurie, how are you? I am
great? How are you? I'mgreat. I'm a little exhausted after hearing
my own bio. Isn't it like, I, you know what, it's
well deserved, Like you really havean impressive resume right there. And I'm
sure I didn't even describe. Ijust gave the highlight reel, So kudos
(03:49):
too, are you okay? I'mjust gonna ask before on a personal note,
are you in like the Philadelphia area? I am. When I heard
you say you're close to Penn,I'm in South Jersey. So I was
like, Oh, I'm Bucks Countygirl, Bucks count You are in the
best places I lived in PA.I would be a Bucks County girl.
My gosh, I live in NewHope. So you have to come and
visit me and we'll go out forwe'll go off, we'll go out for
(04:14):
dinner and drinks or drinks or whateveryou want, like whatever. Yes,
that's so funny, small world.Yes we're neighbors, b and you're in
the cool place about that anyway,So I gave kind of the official highlight
reel of all the things, orat least a lot of the big things.
But in your own words, justtell our listeners a little bit about
(04:34):
who you are and what you do. Yeah, I always love to say
I'm an accidental entrepreneur. When Iwas growing up, my dream was really
to be a fashion writer. Ithought I was going to do something at
the time that felt more practical,become an attorney, and I would still
going to be thrilled to do that. But my passion was really fashion and
(04:54):
pop culture. And I love tosay right now I'm in a full circle
moment when my passionate really is stillpop culture product and I get to design
product that I love now, andit's very interesting to have this full circle
element. We didn't even talk aboutthe fact that you have a new line
at Target. We didn't I sawthat because it wasn't on your official bio,
but I or maybe it wasn't.I'd like just extract. But I
(05:17):
looked at it, and I'm nota product pusher. People like you know
this because I'm all about simplifying andwhatever. But you've got a which,
Hello, you have a product lineof Target that's pretty impressive, and you're
like the first like you're part oftheir like black women Owned initiative. I
don't know the exact terminalog just toforgive me for my ignorance, but like,
(05:39):
kudos to you for giving the wayfor so many people. Yeah,
but it's just one of those fullcircle moments. And I started, And
so one of the things I wantto say to your listeners are those things
that you loved as a teenager,don't dismiss them because you never know where
you know they can take you.And I started out interested in fashion,
answered to that in the back ofseventeen magazine led me to a career in
(06:01):
marketing for over twenty years. Istill love marketing and everything I learned as
a marketer. And really the booktells the story of my burnout, my
first burnout at twenty seven, andthen really a twelve year journey to figure
out this whole work life harmony thing. And I knew pretty early on that
balance wasn't going to be attainable forme. I'm just someone who loved my
(06:26):
work. And I think a lotof times when we talk about this concept
of the work, I say worklife harmony, but work life balance,
we sometimes forget that there are peopleprobably like you and like me, and
like many of your listeners who absolutelylove the work that we're doing right in
our need for harmony comes from reallytaking a break from something we're actually in
love with right ad is really hardto do. I think a lot of
(06:50):
times we think about, you havea night to five and you're not happy
and you want to carve out familytime. What do you do when you
actually love your business? You wouldwant to do it twenty four seven and
it's good for you. And sothat was really where I was, and
it was a long journey that Italked about in the book to get to
these four phases and to really getto the place of feeling harmony when I
(07:11):
realized pretty early on that the ideaof balanced wasn't going to work because balance
means that if you add more work, you have to add more play and
more life, and then you justkeep stacking things and you're not really getting
the end result for either. Whereharmony basically says, you take a plate,
you make your favorite meal, allthe ingredients that work, and that's
the thing that works for you.And the book is really just an invitation
(07:33):
to figure out what work life harmonymeans for you. I love that I'm
looking at a sign right now inyour office that says Clutter Clinic by speaker
series that I do because the veryfirst principle of the Elevation approach is about
decluttering your space. When they takeyou through an exercise, it's not just
physical, right, it's decluttering mental, emotional, calendar clutter, digital clutter.
(07:57):
You know that's my thing. Like, that's all right, guy,
keep talking anyone who runs the ClutterClinic, though I would assume it as
your listening group, I would assumethat's what you're about. But yeah,
that is really what started it allfor me, And so I think for
any of your listeners who are thinkingabout how to get to work life harmony,
it's really important that decluttering your spacewas the very first principle we introduced
(08:22):
in the book. Because I'm sureyou know this. I'm sure you talk
about this and teach this. It'san invitation, right when you're literally,
physically, emotionally, mentally, digitallymaking space, it's an invitation for the
things you want to come. Andthat was really the biggest thing I had
to do, as you talk aboutall my career accolades. So it's like
I talked in the book about quittingWarton and what that journey was like and
(08:43):
quitting a lot of things. Butwhat I didn't realize at the time was
I was really just like clearing emotionalspace, clearing space to really call in
the career I have now that Iabsolutely love, you know, But it
really took that kind of total detoxover my first sabbatical three years ago that
really allowed for me to really createspace to do all the things I'm doing
(09:03):
now. I love it. Andyou bring up some really good points that
I want to just go back andhit on because again, and I say
this all the time, like,I am so blessed that I get to
do a job that I love.Like I get to work with people one
on one. I get to coachand mentor people that are building their own
professional organizing businesses and help them taketheir own passion and turn into a profession.
(09:28):
I get to podcasts and talk tolike amazing talented people like yourself.
And these are all great things,but they all take time, Right,
This is all a lot. There'sa lot that goes into it, and
for a lot of people when youare doing things that you love or all
of these even if you're like,hey, I want to have kids and
I have a bunch of kids down. When you're finally are getting the things
(09:50):
whatever or that are meaningful to you, it really is hard to say no.
And we talk a lot here aboutcolendar clutter. Actually my main three
core principles are physical clutter, emotionalclutter, calendar clutter. Then we talk
about digital clutter, financial clutter,the mental load clutter. So we have
(10:11):
all of these that we talk aboutbecause again, it's not just and the
physical stuff. It's not just thephysical The physical stuff often is a byproduct
of all of the other things,and so it's hard for people to say
no for a variety of reasons.We talk for people to say no because
they're pleasers. It's hard for peopleto say no because I feel guilty,
like you're saying you're achieving all thesuccess and it's oh, wait, Oprah
(10:35):
wants to work with me. Ican't say no to that. Kloe,
I would be insane. Wants towork with me? Where I have this
opportunity to do this. A lotof times we really struggle and I my
nuanced word is integration, right,I say, work like an integration,
But it's all essentially under the sameumbrella of how do you find that?
(10:56):
Again, that all the relationship withhaving enough space to do the things that
are important to you and also theproductive things that are moving the needle.
Yep, and then you hit onit right. It's the space. And
a lot of times we think wewant to change our life, we really
want to, but we're not actuallyclearing out the space to bring in the
(11:18):
change that we're looking for. Yeah, because you have to make time to
do it. If there are certainthings that you're either I always tell people
you're going to either outsource it,gonna have somebody else do it for you.
You're just gonna say I'm gonna paysomebody to declutter, I'm gonna pay
somebody to do my yardwork, I'mgonna pay somebody to do the laundry,
make my meals or whatever, orit's just gonna work. I'm just gonna
(11:41):
be a frazzled mess and I'm goingto be depleting. Or I'm going to
carve out that time to meal prep, do the laundry, put it away,
do the yard work. Whatever thatlooks like. And how do you
fit that in so um terms?If you could talk a little bit about
your burnout, I know we wantto encourage people to go and read the
books. I don't want you togive all the things, but just like,
(12:03):
I think that's an important part becausethere are a lot of people that
are listening out here that are experiencingburnout, and I just think it would
be helpful to hear a little bitabout your story. Yeah, And I
think for me, like my burnoutcame at what many would consider to be
a height of my career. Right, so by twenty seven, I have
been running my business for eleven years, and a few years before that,
(12:26):
I had a cover story with OHMagazine, and that was such a game
changer, having that stamp of approval, and I really just felt so grateful
for all the opportunities. I hadmoved my office to New York City a
couple of years before, and Iwas really in what I considered to be
my prime. And so the firsttime I started to realize the grinding,
drinking Starbucks until three o'clock, notreally sleeping, working in the city four
(12:52):
days a week, going NonStop.At some point that started to catch up
with me. And I had afriend who said, I like, come
with me on a vacation to Miami. We're just gonna have fun and lay
by the pool, and I feelso embarrassed to say this now, but
I'm like, what do you doat the pool? And she's what do
you mean? You just lay there? I'm like, and do what.
I had no experience at that time, but I grew up in southern New
(13:13):
Jersey and the oldest of six.We always had family vacation. We always
had beach vacation. So it's notlike I didn't experience play and fun,
it's just I from teenagers through college, I had really gone into this work
zone. And having that vacation andseeing, oh, this is great did
help me realize, like, there'sanother way. But I still struggled for
the next twelve years because I thenstarted using vacation and workouts and other things
(13:39):
to manage stress, and it justwasn't working. And so that's what really
led me to this four phase approachand what I realized recreation was what was
missing. I was constantly in preparationand inspiration. I think a lot of
your listeners can relate to you dothe work, you get super fired up
about an idea, and then youjust go back and do more work and
get super fired up, and you'rein this weird loop. Of nothing really
(14:01):
coming to fruition. You're putting outa lot of energy, you're talking to
a lot of people, you're doingthe things, but yet it's not coming
together. And what I realized formyself was that recreation was missing. And
recreation can take a lot of forms. Recreation is not exercise. I talk
about that in the book Exercise.For me, it goes in preparation right,
it's what gets my mind right forthe day. Recreation is taking a
(14:24):
walk, of dinner with friends,doing something for yourself. I think we
talk a lot about self care,even that almost the way we use it
to bandage burnout isn't as effective asit could be. The way I'm describing
it in the book. It's mybiggest piece of advice to anyone who feels
like they're in burnout and you wantto really get to the next level is
(14:45):
watch children and watch how they play. And that's really the approach to recreation
I'm asking you to consider. Whichis curious, fun, uninhibited with no
real end goal in mind. Right, a child doesn't say I'm so that
I can go be better at schooltomorrow. It's no agenda. There's not
necessarily like the agenda agenda, right, they're just playing. But and so
(15:09):
that that's really my personal burnout storyis figuring out how do I do the
work that I love, how doI carve out time for my friends and
my family and the busy lives thatwe're all leading, and feel really good
when I'm getting to my goals.So I don't want to get to my
goal or get to the thing I'mtrying to achieve and just be sick and
tired and angry and frustrated when Ireach that. I love that. Thank
first, well, thank you forwalking us through that. And the other
(15:31):
thing that I kept I was thinkingjust as you were talking is and I
see this with a lot of people, just whether it's with clients or just
even my friends in real life,is you're on You're just going NonStop.
Again, this means you could workinside the home, outside the home,
it doesn't really matter, but you'rejust on the go all the time.
And then you have a vacation that'splanned. Actually at the time that we're
(15:54):
recording this, it's our school's springbreak, right, so people a lot
of people are wet, but you'reon the go NonStop twenty four to seven
basically. Then you stop, goon this vacation, which is like your
time out, and you're wherever youare relaxing, maybe you are taking some
(16:15):
a few days of this liken arb. But then you come back and as
soon as you come back, you'reright back where you started. So it's
a temporary fix as opposed to tryingto carve it into weaving it into your
life. As part of this likewe want to live a healthier lifestyle because
all you're doing is hitting the pausebutton, and then you have to also
(16:38):
play catch up because everything else isstill on, like going and you just
check yourself out of the equation forfive to seven days. Yep. It's
so true, and it's funny.I almost caught myself. This is a
lifelong practice for me. I wasplanning my nieces spring break. We're leaving
on a trip tomorrow, and shesays, I'm like, Okay, we're
(17:02):
going to do the thing we alwaysdo, right, We're gonna go to
Europe. Do this, go seethis, go do that, and she's
Latina, I just want to goto the pool and I just want to
go to the beach. And I'mlike, thank you for reminding me that,
just because it's spring break. Wedon't have to hustle through a trip
and see all the things, andwe can just go and do nothing again.
These are practices I needed. I'vecreated a system I need because I
(17:25):
need to work my tools right.And when I feel out of harmony,
the first thing I do is Ilook at these twelve principles of instant elevation
to see what's going on. DoI need to declutter in my space?
Do I need to get curious?What about my numbers? I can rattle
through a list? Am I keepingup with my rituals? And that idea?
I'm like, Okay, I wasabout to turn what should be my
(17:47):
recreation into what inspiration for a bookor a whole thing, right, I
was about to turn this trip intosomething that wasn't meant to be. And
so grateful to her for reminding methat, no, we're going to go
play for little bit because I gotto get back to school when I come
back, and I appreciate you know, it's a very different type of spring
trip for us, but it's exactlywhat in the season. And I do
(18:10):
a lot of work about looking atdifferent personality typologies and how people's personalities and
the lens in which they see theworld. How that influences the relationship with
stuff. So it's geeky clutter stuff. And so I know, for me
as somebody who is a very forwardthinking person, I'm all about planning,
(18:30):
right, I'm a planner. Andthen even when and then when I finally
get to whatever the thing is,whether it's an event or trip or whatever
it is, I'm like, okay, now we're onto, Like where's the
next thing? I'm ready, andit's I can't whether and my husband,
you should say about house projects.We've lived in our house for twenty years,
which is amazing. When I thinkabout I'm like, what, we
(18:52):
haven't been here twenty years? Butwe have, and every year was like
we're doing a new project and he'slike, when are we finally going to
be done? And I'm like,what what do you mean? When there's
always something and you're always going?And that's just the mode that my brain
intuitively works, and I have tobe super intentional about stopping to pause and
rest because again, whether that's thesidal, whether that's environmental, whatever that
(19:18):
is, or intuitive, I justhave this feeling like what I can't just
sit and read a book would belazy. That would be what are you
talking about? So it's like thesame thing with Elie. You're just sitting
by the pool. And I thinkwe have these false narratives that a lot
of women specifically tell ourselves. AndI love that you're shining a light on
(19:41):
that. Yeah, I totally agreewith you, And I think it's just
I'm asking you to look at itall the things we all have to do
in a different way, in adifferent light, ask yourself different questions to
really get to the heart of whatyou really want and again, what work
life harmony really looks like for you. Yeah, And it's gonna be personal,
right, It's gonna be personal dependingon who you are, what it
(20:03):
is that you're trying to achieve,what season of life you're in. If
you're a mom with little kids andyou what your goals and what you need
might be very different than somebody elsethat is in the process of I don't
know, like myself who's an emptynester and I'm on a different journey,
(20:25):
or somebody that is just starting theircareer there. I think, again,
it's going to look different depending onwho you are and what you're you know,
what your goals are totally And alsothere are seasons where we are just
busy, right, there are somethings that are inevitable, right if you
have listeners who have back to school, Like back to school is not when
you're taking a long break for recreation, right, like you some things,
(20:48):
or if you're working on your PhD, there's a time when you are like
really pedaled to the medal. Right. What I'm asking you to do is
think about those times and say,Okay, I can't go on vacation when
my kids go back to school,but that's the time to keep up with
my rituals. Right, So ifI have a morning coffee or morning hot
beverage ritual, whatever it is,gotta do it. If I've got a
(21:11):
ritual round, I want to takea bath. I have a friend who
just said she started this dry brushingand then self tanning ritual but not thing
right, And she's like a drybrush and then twenty four hours later I
got to do the self tanp ButI'm like, whatever it is. Even
if in those really busy seasons,you are giving yourself five minutes a day
to say, I'm going to thinkabout me, because you're being intentional it's
(21:33):
going to fuel you getting through thatreally tough season. That's it, and
you hit the nail right in thehead. It's that intentionality. It's doing
the little things. It's those littlethings that you do recurring that will then
eventually end up and they the moreyou work that muscle and continue. Like
you said, I love it becauseI use the word all the time.
It's practice. It's the continual practiceof I'm doing this. And it could
(21:56):
be I'm putting my phone like comenine o'clock, my phone goes on do
not disturb or whatever it is.Do you know what I mean? And
I'm just making up whatever time.But I'm just saying, if I know
that if it's around me, I'mgoing to just pick it up. So
I just don't put it around me, or I'm going to intentionally say,
you know what, I'm going tostop answering email after eight o'clock because I
(22:17):
can. And again, this isall going to be dependent on your life
and how it works for you.But just setting those parameters and sticking to
it. And I think also,I don't know if you find this.
People tend to be black and white, like they think if they do it,
it has to be the way,like you could try it and be
like, yeah, that didn't reallywork, let me probably something else.
(22:40):
Absolutely, and that the book isan invitation you really get to know yourself
again. And I'm so glad youbrought that up because I also say that
about goals and dreams, like justbecause it was your dream ten years ago
does not mean that you have tostick with it. You can decide you
want something new or something different.You can decide that rituals that work for
you in one season don't serve youin the next. All of those things
can change for me. My preparationseason in the winter, being an East
(23:03):
Coast girl looks very different than myspring and summer. Right so, even
when I am in preparation or doingdifferent workouts now that it's nice weather,
I tend to want to do everythingoutside. Right now, my numbers white.
Wait, everything looks very different becauseI'm out and about and moving and
walking and doing different things than Ido in the winter where I like to
be warm and I'm doing hot yogaand doing reformer, And so it's okay
(23:25):
to change those things. I evenchange personally. I change my skincare every
season because my skin needs different things, and so we're making all of those
changes, our diets, everything.Why would we say that the same goal
we set for ourselves in one seasonis exactly what we want to do in
the next. Or you have togive yourself permission to evolve, in permission
to just change and want different things. And I love that. And you
(23:48):
can so tie that right in withyour physical stuff, because I see this
with people with when it comes tophysical clutter that shows up in their lives
where they accumulated something because it wasimportant to them, whether it and i'd
say it with kids right like kidshave a hobby or sport that they're interested.
You accumulate all of this stuff andthen they outgrow it or they're not
(24:08):
into it anymore. And it couldgo for adult hobbies or kids. But
for whatever reason, you feel likeI've invested in this or maybe I'll come
back to it, and you holdonto things that maybe it's just time to
let those things go. And youcould look at that in terms of your
(24:29):
time and the way that you're spendingit and the physical things and where you're
giving your attention the people that you'releaning into, the relationships. Again,
I talk a lot about that aswell, like relationships that serve you well
in one season might be time suckingin another phase of your life. Absolutely,
and that I actually have a relationshipLedger in the book that asks you
(24:52):
asks you to really look at that, and we have a principle in the
book that says you can't make withdrawsor you haven't made deposits, and we
literally have a like deposits and withdrawalsLedger, so that you can take some
of it about that because I agreewith you, like our relationships are the
most important thing that you know,in my opinion, towards achieving work life
(25:14):
harmony. A lot of times ifwe're out of saying or out of that
harmony, it's because a relationship isoff at some point. But there are
different types of relationships. I inviteyou to look at, whether it's friend
tours, over mentors, your personalboard of directors like your Fab five,
and I really dive into the differenttypes of relationships we can all experience because
it's not a one size fits all, And I think the more you understand
(25:37):
where everyone fits in your life,the better you are at managing your time,
managing your energy, managing expectations andall of that contributes to work life
harmony. I love it. Ilove all about it. What is your
I'm just thinking again of the startwe were talking before we before we hit
record, about like the people whowatch and listen to our show, and
(26:00):
we run the spectrum similar to yourdemographic, primarily women. All those shout
out to all the men that dolisten to our show, but we have
a large demographic of women who arejust feeling like they're in the weeds with
things. And I remember the conversationsthat I've had with people that are just
like I've got my husband travels,or I'm a single mom, and I
(26:22):
like finding that five minutes where somebodyisn't tugging at my leg or my phone
isn't blowing up. It's really hardand carving out that time for myself to
do those have that recreation time.What are some can you give some like
real practical examples of where maybe somebodycan start, because I think sometimes when
(26:45):
you're so in the weed, youcan't even see I don't even where to
begin now. And I my cowriter and my Stephanie Smith are really thoughtful,
and when I started to put togetherthe principles, the first thing is.
It was important to me that everyprinciple for instant elevation be something that
costs you no money, right ifyou choose to find but I'm telling you
to move, I'm not telling youwhat type of workout will how to move
(27:08):
what it caught like movement cannon shouldbe free. Right. And the other
piece that was really important to meis that everything I was suggesting you could
start with just a five minute investment, right, because we are talking about
women who are incredibly busy. WhenI think about my demographic and the women
I'm really writing and speaking too,I like to almost call it's like a
(27:30):
sandwich generation because we're sandwiched between takingcare of children and eight parents totally at
that grab. On both sides,parents are aging and the emotional toll that's
being taken there and raising children thatis incredibly time consuming. It's work that
we love to do on both sides, and so you're not upset about either,
(27:53):
but it is taking time away.I remember when I was in my
marketing days, I was working ona client who had a business and incontinence
completely unrelated, and I read thestatistic that really changed the game for me.
But it was just a study ofa done that said that on average,
women in general are doing an extrathirty hours of caregiving per month,
(28:14):
per week sorry, and women ofcolor even more. And I thought,
Okay, we're telling women carve outspace for your you take two hours a
day to do your workout, drybrushing, all the things great that we
want you to do, and beyonda full time job, you are doing
thirty additional hours. So even thinkabout those who are working in the home,
you are still giving an additional thirtyhours of your week to other types
(28:37):
of care outside anything you're doing inyour home. When we want to say,
now make time for you. Forso many people if they want to
sleep, where is the time comingfrom? But literally as an eist in
the calendar, so you can't makethat up. And so that's where I
really thought, Okay, five minutes. What time each day can we all
own? When the first thing thatcame to me was the commute to work.
(29:02):
If you are commuting, what canyou do if you're not commuting and
you're just spending a few minutes inthe morning, I like to put my
guilty pleasure. One of my ritualsin the morning is my customized news briefing,
right, like my Alexa to talkto me, tell me what's going
on while I'm doing all the things. So I'm like making use of that
time. I feel really informed.It's part of my preparation base that starts
(29:22):
in my morning. But what arethose things? And if you can just
give yourself five minutes, I thinkthe idea of thirty minutes an hour can
be incredibly overwhelming to really busy people. I will tell you For me,
my recreation in the afternoon felt alittle indulgent at first, until I realized
it was really helping me bring mywork together and was really impacting my work
(29:45):
in a very positive way. Sosome of these things, I do think
you have to take five minutes orjust try it out to see if it
works for you, because it's reallyhard to get to the point of saying
I'm going to just take this houror take my lunch break later and do
this thing instead. If you haven'ttried any you don't see it's working for
you. I think you bring upa really good point that it doesn't have
to be a specific, rigid timeduring the day. So if you know
(30:11):
that you are, your mornings arecrazy, right, And because you've got
you're commuting, you've got multiple kidsgoing to different school at different times or
what and again, and I don'tmean to be speaking. There's people that
are listening that don't have kids athome, but I just I'm just thinking
about my own life when I wasin the crazy seasons of just feeling like
(30:33):
I don't have any time. Maybeyour time is at eleven in the morning,
do you know what I mean?Maybe your time is at three o'clock
in the afternoon. Maybe that's whenyou have your five minutes. So I
think we put ourselves in these Weoften draw these like conclusions where there's specific
buckets of you need to do havea morning routine, you have a nighttime
routine, but maybe your routine islate morning. You just say I'm going
(30:59):
to whatever, go for a walkaround the block, or I'm going to
do my dry brushing, and thatis your time. So I think it's
important to whatever that is. Findjust like we talk about I talk a
lot about your peak productivity time,like when you are trying to do productive
things. Some people are mourning people, some people are night owls. Find
your people are activity time. Inthis case, look at where it can
(31:22):
organically, because the lesson you needto do is try to make more work
for yourself. As you want thisto not be another thing on your to
do list. Is this should besomething that is recharging you, not adding
to the depletion. Absolutely, andI love that idea. That's why I
tell everyone I'm going to ask youa lot of questions. You're going to
(31:42):
really get to know yourself, andthat is part of the journey is saying,
like, when do my rituals fitin? What does decluttering look like?
Even down to what are the numbersthat you want to pay attention to?
What numbers do you want to beaccountable to. One of my accountability
numbers is my sleep score. Everyday. I was the person that would
say I'm getting enough sleep, I'mgetting enough sleep. And then I finally
started wearing this little device that tracksmy sleep. And at first I was
(32:07):
like completely hort by by what Iconsidered enough sleep and like my body wasn't
really reaching readiness. And when Ireally started to think through that, I'm
like, oh, okay, Ineed to make some changes. We all
have data that matters to us.It's a very specific experience, and so
I love what you're talking about,because that is really what work life harmony
is about. It's about figuring outwhat works for you, and only you
(32:30):
know that, and only you knowwhat doesn't work for you as well.
Yeah. Absolutely, And I reallyI love the fact that your framework,
it gives you a framework, butyet it's fluid enough to say you could
adapt this. It's not putting youin this specific bucket or box that you
(32:52):
have to subscribe to do these stepsthis way in order to achieve it.
Because again, our goals are different, our lives are different, and what,
like you said, what we need, like what defines my level of
rest and restoration might be very differentthan somebody else's. Absolutely, and that
(33:14):
also that's why you'll be able tostick with this plan, right, because
it is you have co created itfor yourself. Right. I might be
giving you a framework, but thenyou've taken that framework and actually built out
what works for you, versus gettingsomething from someone else where you're like,
this doesn't fit, and this doesn'tfit. It's note, this is a
process where you can literally layer inevery single thing that will work and fit
(33:35):
for you to help you have thatwork life harmony. All right, So
on that note, because I couldkeep talking to you for hours and hours.
But on that note, tell ourlisteners where they can obviously buy the
book, but where can they findyou? Connect up all the things?
Yeah, so you can find meat Tina Wells dot com. I'm also
on Instagram at Tina Wells. Ihave a weekly newsletter where I sh share
(33:58):
a lot of tips and trick someblogs all related to the Elevation approach.
And of course you can find Elevationby Tina Wells, which is a home
office line of products exclusively at Target. So we're in over fo yeaha and
Target dot com which is so awesomereally, I love it. And again
we will link to all things Tinain our show notes. So if you're
(34:22):
in the car, on the treadmill, out taking a walk wherever, don't
worry about it. We got youcovered. Just go to our podcast page
or wherever you're listening to this episodeand we will have all the things Tina
related there for you. So we'regoing to take a quick break and then
when we come back, we're justgoing to put you in the hot seat
(34:43):
for our wrap up questions. Sosit tight, hey, parents, If
you are drowning in a sea ofpapers, projects and archo masterpieces. I
have got a solution for you,and contrar to what you might think,
it is not to throw everything out. I know that the end of year
year is crunch time when all thoselockers, cubbies, everything gets cleaned out,
(35:05):
the backpacks and all the stuff ofwhat do I keep? What do
I save? Gets dumped on yourkitchen table. So if that is you,
I have got a solution for you. My friend Denise Alright has created
an incredible product called the class Keeper. And I know I've talked about when
my girls were younger, I hada binder with protective sheets where I would
(35:28):
just go through and keep the stuffthat I thought they might want to look
back on one day, as opposedto just either throwing everything out or dumping
everything into just tubs and handing itoff to them. Denise took my idea
and elevated it into an actual product, and it's got different sleeves and categories,
and there's all different designs, andthere's a digital version as well for
(35:49):
Hello parents of the twenty first century, so you can digitize your kids keepsakes
and artworks. And it's also somethingthat is a project that you can assign
to the kids, depending on howold they are, if you want to
when they come home, say hey, I want you to sort through this
pile of stuff and decide which onesdo you want to keep it, what
do you want to get rid of. Not only is it taking something off
(36:10):
of your plate, but is empoweringyour kids to make some decisions and use
their critical thinking skills. So Ilove that idea. The other thing I
want to talk to you about isDenise's other product, which has to do
with art, chore charts and responsibilities. As the summer changes and we have
(36:30):
a lot of times the kids homeand we want to have them pitching around
the house, we're not really surehow to go about motivating them. It's
often a really hard thing to do. And through Denise's Earn and Learn product
line, she's got a bunch ofdifferent chore charts with they're all non dated.
(36:51):
It's fifty two pages, I think, and you can customize it to
whatever it is that you want.So it could be taking out the trash,
could be making your bed, loading, unloading the dishwasher, vacuuming,
sweeping, whatever it is, walkingthe dog, and all of these you
can decide either our point value.You can decide some sort of reward system,
but I really love it because itallows you to get the kids involved
(37:13):
and a really fun way, becauseher products are bright and colorful and really
engaging, especially for those younger kidswhere they have that visual stimulation as opposed
to just being like wa wah wah, I have to do all these shores.
Denise has offered an incredible discount exclusivelyfor our listeners of this Organized life
podcast and followers. Will simply beIf you go to Denise Albright dot com
(37:37):
and you punch in the code simplythirty, that's simp y thirty at checkout,
you will resee thirty percent off yourentire order. I'm telling you,
these are great gifts that are practical, useful, and fun for the kids.
And again, if you get theminvolved in this, it makes it
more exciting for them. They havemore skin in the game and it takes
(37:59):
more off of your plate, whichis a win win for everybody. So
visit Denise Alright dot com, DE N I S E A L Bright
dot com and it check out usecode simply thirty to get thirty percent off
your entire order. All right,Tina, This has been great. I
know I'm inspired and charged up,and I try to reader our guests books
(38:22):
before they come on the show,but I haven't read yours. And I
absolutely am going to buy it assoon as we're done, because I love
it and I love all the things. I love any time that somebody can
put together options and solutions for people. So thank you so much for doing
this. Speaking of books, sowe always ask our guests a few wrap
(38:44):
up questions. The first one hasto do with books of inspiration. Obviously,
you've put out a book that isinspiring other people. But is there
a book that you either continually goback to yourself or that you refer to
other people that's had a big impactor transformative play in your life that you
(39:05):
can share with our listeners. Yeah, I guess I would go to two
books first, would be Good toGreat. I think it's just a classic,
and I think it really for mestarting out in business, it was
just such a good read to understandthe difference between a good company and a
great company. Okay, I justthink personally, I love Marie Fourlio's Everything
is figure Outable. Yeah, Ijust think that's something we always need to
(39:27):
remind ourselves, and my dad usedalways tell me growing up that if you
fail to plan, you plan tofail. And so I think the idea
of planning and just knowing that Ican get a plan around, if I
can get some thought around it,I can figure it out. And so
I think Marie's book is just agreat reminder to all of us, You're
going to figure this out. Yeah, I love it so true. I'm
like Marie fourlio fans, So Ithink that's awesome. We will put those
(39:51):
in and we have a whole goodReads list of all of our of our
books, so everyone go check thoseout, Okay. And then our last
two questions that we've asked every yessince the start of our show, is
in this particular season of your life, where do you feel the most organized?
And where do you feel like alittle bit of a hot mess.
And I'm going to make you surewith the hot mess, because I don't
(40:13):
like ending on a mess moment.Where do you feel like you're a little
out of out of my hot mess? So I believe in like when it
comes to decluttering, you need tohave a landing zone and if you can
get that thing cleaned, everything feelsclean right now. And so I say
my hot mess is like my islandis my landing zone, and I have
(40:34):
a corner of it that feels asclean as it like it to be right
now, So that that is myhot mess. And then what do I
think I'm doing well calendar clutter?I think my calendar recently and just figuring
out, like carving out the spaceand time I need and making sure I'm
getting those things in there that Ineed to have and saying no one of
(40:57):
the things that aren't working right now. It's I think I'm doing well with
the calendar. Awesome, I loveit. That's great, Tina. It's
been such a pleasure shotting with you. Thank you so much for coming on
our show and sharing your wisdom withour community. Here. If you're new
to our show, welcome. We'reso happy that your yere. Make sure
to click the subscribe follow button.We've got well over three hundred plus episodes
(41:22):
on all things about physical clutter,calendar clutter, emotional clutter, or digital
clutter, all anything that you canimagine. And of course, like I
said, we have our new Monday'sTip of the Week, so lots to
see. Listen here and do ourshow. So thank you so much.
I'll be back next week for anotherepisode of This Organized Life. Until then,
(41:43):
I'm Lauri Palau. Peace out.Thanks for tuning in. If you'd
liked this episode, please spread thelove and share it with your friends.
If this is your first time joiningus, make sure to click the subscribe
button wherever you're real listing so younever miss an episode. And while you're
there, please leave us a reviewso other people knew that our show is
worth to listen. You can alsofind us on YouTube and Instagram at This
Organized Life podcast, and if you'dlike to connect with us, you can
(42:06):
head on over to our website atsimply the letterb like boy organized dot com,
which is filled with tons of resources, including free downloads, checklists,
links to our amazing organizing partners,and all of our digital offerings. I'll
see you next week for another episodeof This Organized Life
Welcome to This Organized Life. Ifyou're a mom, wife, or coffee
lovers seeking advice on how to reduceclutter and reclaim time, look no further
than your host, Laurie Palau,Founder Simply Be Organized, an author of
hot Mess, a practical guide togetting organized. For a lot of people,
clutter is their dirty little secret,but it doesn't have to be.
Each week, we will share practicaltips, chat with experts, and provide
(00:23):
strategies on how to keep you organized. I hope that by sharing our stories
you feel a little less alone andmore empowered to tackle the areas that are
holding you back. So let's getstarted. Hi everybody, and welcome to
today's episode of This Organized Life podcast. I am your host, Laurie Palau,
(00:45):
and I am so that you're here. Before we get into today's episode,
I just want to give a hugeshout out to everyone out there to
say thank you for all the positivefeedback that we've been getting on our new
Monday drop of the week. Soif this is your first time tuning in,
we have been for years doing ourreleasing all of our episodes on Thursdays,
(01:07):
and they've been our long form episodeslike the one you're about to hear
with amazing guests. But we realizethat not everybody has a full forty five
minutes and sometimes we just need alittle extra boost and inspiration, and so
we recently last month started dropping theseadditional bonus episodes on Mondays and we're calling
them Tip of the Week. They'reshort, like ten minute episodes, which
(01:30):
is one little nugget of inspiration foryou, something to think about, something
that you can practically implement in yourlife. And you guys are loving it.
We're getting such great response, sothank you so much. Make sure
that you click the subscribe button,share it with a friend, all the
things. It really just helps getour show out in front of other people,
and so we really appreciate it.Now back to today's episode. So
(01:55):
we, like I said, loveto bring on guests of all different walks
of life, from all different industriesand have all different perspectives. And I
have an amazing guest that I can'twait to learn from today. I'm actually
going to read you a little bitabout it. I don't normally read bios,
but this bios pretty impressive, soI'm going to read it. So
joining me today is Tina Wells sowhen I'm about to rattle off Tina's accomplishments,
(02:21):
You're going to be like, really, She's been in essences forty under
forty. She's the author of overtwenty books. She's the academic director for
Wharton's Leadership in the Business World Programat University of Pennsylvania, which is not
that far from me. She's thefounder of Buzz Marketing Group, an agency
(02:42):
that she founded at wait for it, age sixteen with clients like bell Oprah
Winfrey, Network, Kroeger, Applep and g J and j An American
Eagle. But I invited her onthe show to talk about her new book,
which is called The Elevation Approach.And what I love about this book
is at talks about how she integratespersonal and professional ambitions, values and responsibilities
(03:06):
through this four phase plan. Andwe're going to talk about the four phase
plan is preparation, inspiration, recreation, and transformation. We're going to dig
into all the things. But again, Tina is just walks the walk,
talks the talk, and I said, we just got to have you on
the show. So without further ado, let me welcome Tina Wells to the
(03:27):
show. Welcome Tina, Hi,Laurie, how are you? I am
great? How are you? I'mgreat. I'm a little exhausted after hearing
my own bio. Isn't it like, I, you know what, it's
well deserved, Like you really havean impressive resume right there. And I'm
sure I didn't even describe. Ijust gave the highlight reel, So kudos
(03:49):
too, are you okay? I'mjust gonna ask before on a personal note,
are you in like the Philadelphia area? I am. When I heard
you say you're close to Penn,I'm in South Jersey. So I was
like, Oh, I'm Bucks Countygirl, Bucks count You are in the
best places I lived in PA.I would be a Bucks County girl.
My gosh, I live in NewHope. So you have to come and
visit me and we'll go out forwe'll go off, we'll go out for
(04:14):
dinner and drinks or drinks or whateveryou want, like whatever. Yes,
that's so funny, small world.Yes we're neighbors, b and you're in
the cool place about that anyway,So I gave kind of the official highlight
reel of all the things, orat least a lot of the big things.
But in your own words, justtell our listeners a little bit about
(04:34):
who you are and what you do. Yeah, I always love to say
I'm an accidental entrepreneur. When Iwas growing up, my dream was really
to be a fashion writer. Ithought I was going to do something at
the time that felt more practical,become an attorney, and I would still
going to be thrilled to do that. But my passion was really fashion and
(04:54):
pop culture. And I love tosay right now I'm in a full circle
moment when my passionate really is stillpop culture product and I get to design
product that I love now, andit's very interesting to have this full circle
element. We didn't even talk aboutthe fact that you have a new line
at Target. We didn't I sawthat because it wasn't on your official bio,
but I or maybe it wasn't.I'd like just extract. But I
(05:17):
looked at it, and I'm nota product pusher. People like you know
this because I'm all about simplifying andwhatever. But you've got a which,
Hello, you have a product lineof Target that's pretty impressive, and you're
like the first like you're part oftheir like black women Owned initiative. I
don't know the exact terminalog just toforgive me for my ignorance, but like,
(05:39):
kudos to you for giving the wayfor so many people. Yeah,
but it's just one of those fullcircle moments. And I started, And
so one of the things I wantto say to your listeners are those things
that you loved as a teenager,don't dismiss them because you never know where
you know they can take you.And I started out interested in fashion,
answered to that in the back ofseventeen magazine led me to a career in
(06:01):
marketing for over twenty years. Istill love marketing and everything I learned as
a marketer. And really the booktells the story of my burnout, my
first burnout at twenty seven, andthen really a twelve year journey to figure
out this whole work life harmony thing. And I knew pretty early on that
balance wasn't going to be attainable forme. I'm just someone who loved my
(06:26):
work. And I think a lotof times when we talk about this concept
of the work, I say worklife harmony, but work life balance,
we sometimes forget that there are peopleprobably like you and like me, and
like many of your listeners who absolutelylove the work that we're doing right in
our need for harmony comes from reallytaking a break from something we're actually in
love with right ad is really hardto do. I think a lot of
(06:50):
times we think about, you havea night to five and you're not happy
and you want to carve out familytime. What do you do when you
actually love your business? You wouldwant to do it twenty four seven and
it's good for you. And sothat was really where I was, and
it was a long journey that Italked about in the book to get to
these four phases and to really getto the place of feeling harmony when I
(07:11):
realized pretty early on that the ideaof balanced wasn't going to work because balance
means that if you add more work, you have to add more play and
more life, and then you justkeep stacking things and you're not really getting
the end result for either. Whereharmony basically says, you take a plate,
you make your favorite meal, allthe ingredients that work, and that's
the thing that works for you.And the book is really just an invitation
(07:33):
to figure out what work life harmonymeans for you. I love that I'm
looking at a sign right now inyour office that says Clutter Clinic by speaker
series that I do because the veryfirst principle of the Elevation approach is about
decluttering your space. When they takeyou through an exercise, it's not just
physical, right, it's decluttering mental, emotional, calendar clutter, digital clutter.
(07:57):
You know that's my thing. Like, that's all right, guy,
keep talking anyone who runs the ClutterClinic, though I would assume it as
your listening group, I would assumethat's what you're about. But yeah,
that is really what started it allfor me, And so I think for
any of your listeners who are thinkingabout how to get to work life harmony,
it's really important that decluttering your spacewas the very first principle we introduced
(08:22):
in the book. Because I'm sureyou know this. I'm sure you talk
about this and teach this. It'san invitation, right when you're literally,
physically, emotionally, mentally, digitallymaking space, it's an invitation for the
things you want to come. Andthat was really the biggest thing I had
to do, as you talk aboutall my career accolades. So it's like
I talked in the book about quittingWarton and what that journey was like and
(08:43):
quitting a lot of things. Butwhat I didn't realize at the time was
I was really just like clearing emotionalspace, clearing space to really call in
the career I have now that Iabsolutely love, you know, But it
really took that kind of total detoxover my first sabbatical three years ago that
really allowed for me to really createspace to do all the things I'm doing
(09:03):
now. I love it. Andyou bring up some really good points that
I want to just go back andhit on because again, and I say
this all the time, like,I am so blessed that I get to
do a job that I love.Like I get to work with people one
on one. I get to coachand mentor people that are building their own
professional organizing businesses and help them taketheir own passion and turn into a profession.
(09:28):
I get to podcasts and talk tolike amazing talented people like yourself.
And these are all great things,but they all take time, Right,
This is all a lot. There'sa lot that goes into it, and
for a lot of people when youare doing things that you love or all
of these even if you're like,hey, I want to have kids and
I have a bunch of kids down. When you're finally are getting the things
(09:50):
whatever or that are meaningful to you, it really is hard to say no.
And we talk a lot here aboutcolendar clutter. Actually my main three
core principles are physical clutter, emotionalclutter, calendar clutter. Then we talk
about digital clutter, financial clutter,the mental load clutter. So we have
(10:11):
all of these that we talk aboutbecause again, it's not just and the
physical stuff. It's not just thephysical The physical stuff often is a byproduct
of all of the other things,and so it's hard for people to say
no for a variety of reasons.We talk for people to say no because
they're pleasers. It's hard for peopleto say no because I feel guilty,
like you're saying you're achieving all thesuccess and it's oh, wait, Oprah
(10:35):
wants to work with me. Ican't say no to that. Kloe,
I would be insane. Wants towork with me? Where I have this
opportunity to do this. A lotof times we really struggle and I my
nuanced word is integration, right,I say, work like an integration,
But it's all essentially under the sameumbrella of how do you find that?
(10:56):
Again, that all the relationship withhaving enough space to do the things that
are important to you and also theproductive things that are moving the needle.
Yep, and then you hit onit right. It's the space. And
a lot of times we think wewant to change our life, we really
want to, but we're not actuallyclearing out the space to bring in the
(11:18):
change that we're looking for. Yeah, because you have to make time to
do it. If there are certainthings that you're either I always tell people
you're going to either outsource it,gonna have somebody else do it for you.
You're just gonna say I'm gonna paysomebody to declutter, I'm gonna pay
somebody to do my yardwork, I'mgonna pay somebody to do the laundry,
make my meals or whatever, orit's just gonna work. I'm just gonna
(11:41):
be a frazzled mess and I'm goingto be depleting. Or I'm going to
carve out that time to meal prep, do the laundry, put it away,
do the yard work. Whatever thatlooks like. And how do you
fit that in so um terms?If you could talk a little bit about
your burnout, I know we wantto encourage people to go and read the
books. I don't want you togive all the things, but just like,
(12:03):
I think that's an important part becausethere are a lot of people that
are listening out here that are experiencingburnout, and I just think it would
be helpful to hear a little bitabout your story. Yeah, And I
think for me, like my burnoutcame at what many would consider to be
a height of my career. Right, so by twenty seven, I have
been running my business for eleven years, and a few years before that,
(12:26):
I had a cover story with OHMagazine, and that was such a game
changer, having that stamp of approval, and I really just felt so grateful
for all the opportunities. I hadmoved my office to New York City a
couple of years before, and Iwas really in what I considered to be
my prime. And so the firsttime I started to realize the grinding,
drinking Starbucks until three o'clock, notreally sleeping, working in the city four
(12:52):
days a week, going NonStop.At some point that started to catch up
with me. And I had afriend who said, I like, come
with me on a vacation to Miami. We're just gonna have fun and lay
by the pool, and I feelso embarrassed to say this now, but
I'm like, what do you doat the pool? And she's what do
you mean? You just lay there? I'm like, and do what.
I had no experience at that time, but I grew up in southern New
(13:13):
Jersey and the oldest of six.We always had family vacation. We always
had beach vacation. So it's notlike I didn't experience play and fun,
it's just I from teenagers through college, I had really gone into this work
zone. And having that vacation andseeing, oh, this is great did
help me realize, like, there'sanother way. But I still struggled for
the next twelve years because I thenstarted using vacation and workouts and other things
(13:39):
to manage stress, and it justwasn't working. And so that's what really
led me to this four phase approachand what I realized recreation was what was
missing. I was constantly in preparationand inspiration. I think a lot of
your listeners can relate to you dothe work, you get super fired up
about an idea, and then youjust go back and do more work and
get super fired up, and you'rein this weird loop. Of nothing really
(14:01):
coming to fruition. You're putting outa lot of energy, you're talking to
a lot of people, you're doingthe things, but yet it's not coming
together. And what I realized formyself was that recreation was missing. And
recreation can take a lot of forms. Recreation is not exercise. I talk
about that in the book Exercise.For me, it goes in preparation right,
it's what gets my mind right forthe day. Recreation is taking a
(14:24):
walk, of dinner with friends,doing something for yourself. I think we
talk a lot about self care,even that almost the way we use it
to bandage burnout isn't as effective asit could be. The way I'm describing
it in the book. It's mybiggest piece of advice to anyone who feels
like they're in burnout and you wantto really get to the next level is
(14:45):
watch children and watch how they play. And that's really the approach to recreation
I'm asking you to consider. Whichis curious, fun, uninhibited with no
real end goal in mind. Right, a child doesn't say I'm so that
I can go be better at schooltomorrow. It's no agenda. There's not
necessarily like the agenda agenda, right, they're just playing. But and so
(15:09):
that that's really my personal burnout storyis figuring out how do I do the
work that I love, how doI carve out time for my friends and
my family and the busy lives thatwe're all leading, and feel really good
when I'm getting to my goals.So I don't want to get to my
goal or get to the thing I'mtrying to achieve and just be sick and
tired and angry and frustrated when Ireach that. I love that. Thank
first, well, thank you forwalking us through that. And the other
(15:31):
thing that I kept I was thinkingjust as you were talking is and I
see this with a lot of people, just whether it's with clients or just
even my friends in real life,is you're on You're just going NonStop.
Again, this means you could workinside the home, outside the home,
it doesn't really matter, but you'rejust on the go all the time.
And then you have a vacation that'splanned. Actually at the time that we're
(15:54):
recording this, it's our school's springbreak, right, so people a lot
of people are wet, but you'reon the go NonStop twenty four to seven
basically. Then you stop, goon this vacation, which is like your
time out, and you're wherever youare relaxing, maybe you are taking some
(16:15):
a few days of this liken arb. But then you come back and as
soon as you come back, you'reright back where you started. So it's
a temporary fix as opposed to tryingto carve it into weaving it into your
life. As part of this likewe want to live a healthier lifestyle because
all you're doing is hitting the pausebutton, and then you have to also
(16:38):
play catch up because everything else isstill on, like going and you just
check yourself out of the equation forfive to seven days. Yep. It's
so true, and it's funny.I almost caught myself. This is a
lifelong practice for me. I wasplanning my nieces spring break. We're leaving
on a trip tomorrow, and shesays, I'm like, Okay, we're
(17:02):
going to do the thing we alwaysdo, right, We're gonna go to
Europe. Do this, go seethis, go do that, and she's
Latina, I just want to goto the pool and I just want to
go to the beach. And I'mlike, thank you for reminding me that,
just because it's spring break. Wedon't have to hustle through a trip
and see all the things, andwe can just go and do nothing again.
These are practices I needed. I'vecreated a system I need because I
(17:25):
need to work my tools right.And when I feel out of harmony,
the first thing I do is Ilook at these twelve principles of instant elevation
to see what's going on. DoI need to declutter in my space?
Do I need to get curious?What about my numbers? I can rattle
through a list? Am I keepingup with my rituals? And that idea?
I'm like, Okay, I wasabout to turn what should be my
(17:47):
recreation into what inspiration for a bookor a whole thing, right, I
was about to turn this trip intosomething that wasn't meant to be. And
so grateful to her for reminding methat, no, we're going to go
play for little bit because I gotto get back to school when I come
back, and I appreciate you know, it's a very different type of spring
trip for us, but it's exactlywhat in the season. And I do
(18:10):
a lot of work about looking atdifferent personality typologies and how people's personalities and
the lens in which they see theworld. How that influences the relationship with
stuff. So it's geeky clutter stuff. And so I know, for me
as somebody who is a very forwardthinking person, I'm all about planning,
(18:30):
right, I'm a planner. Andthen even when and then when I finally
get to whatever the thing is,whether it's an event or trip or whatever
it is, I'm like, okay, now we're onto, Like where's the
next thing? I'm ready, andit's I can't whether and my husband,
you should say about house projects.We've lived in our house for twenty years,
which is amazing. When I thinkabout I'm like, what, we
(18:52):
haven't been here twenty years? Butwe have, and every year was like
we're doing a new project and he'slike, when are we finally going to
be done? And I'm like,what what do you mean? When there's
always something and you're always going?And that's just the mode that my brain
intuitively works, and I have tobe super intentional about stopping to pause and
rest because again, whether that's thesidal, whether that's environmental, whatever that
(19:18):
is, or intuitive, I justhave this feeling like what I can't just
sit and read a book would belazy. That would be what are you
talking about? So it's like thesame thing with Elie. You're just sitting
by the pool. And I thinkwe have these false narratives that a lot
of women specifically tell ourselves. AndI love that you're shining a light on
(19:41):
that. Yeah, I totally agreewith you, And I think it's just
I'm asking you to look at itall the things we all have to do
in a different way, in adifferent light, ask yourself different questions to
really get to the heart of whatyou really want and again, what work
life harmony really looks like for you. Yeah, And it's gonna be personal,
right, It's gonna be personal dependingon who you are, what it
(20:03):
is that you're trying to achieve,what season of life you're in. If
you're a mom with little kids andyou what your goals and what you need
might be very different than somebody elsethat is in the process of I don't
know, like myself who's an emptynester and I'm on a different journey,
(20:25):
or somebody that is just starting theircareer there. I think, again,
it's going to look different depending onwho you are and what you're you know,
what your goals are totally And alsothere are seasons where we are just
busy, right, there are somethings that are inevitable, right if you
have listeners who have back to school, Like back to school is not when
you're taking a long break for recreation, right, like you some things,
(20:48):
or if you're working on your PhD, there's a time when you are like
really pedaled to the medal. Right. What I'm asking you to do is
think about those times and say,Okay, I can't go on vacation when
my kids go back to school,but that's the time to keep up with
my rituals. Right, So ifI have a morning coffee or morning hot
beverage ritual, whatever it is,gotta do it. If I've got a
(21:11):
ritual round, I want to takea bath. I have a friend who
just said she started this dry brushingand then self tanning ritual but not thing
right, And she's like a drybrush and then twenty four hours later I
got to do the self tanp ButI'm like, whatever it is. Even
if in those really busy seasons,you are giving yourself five minutes a day
to say, I'm going to thinkabout me, because you're being intentional it's
(21:33):
going to fuel you getting through thatreally tough season. That's it, and
you hit the nail right in thehead. It's that intentionality. It's doing
the little things. It's those littlethings that you do recurring that will then
eventually end up and they the moreyou work that muscle and continue. Like
you said, I love it becauseI use the word all the time.
It's practice. It's the continual practiceof I'm doing this. And it could
(21:56):
be I'm putting my phone like comenine o'clock, my phone goes on do
not disturb or whatever it is.Do you know what I mean? And
I'm just making up whatever time.But I'm just saying, if I know
that if it's around me, I'mgoing to just pick it up. So
I just don't put it around me, or I'm going to intentionally say,
you know what, I'm going tostop answering email after eight o'clock because I
(22:17):
can. And again, this isall going to be dependent on your life
and how it works for you.But just setting those parameters and sticking to
it. And I think also,I don't know if you find this.
People tend to be black and white, like they think if they do it,
it has to be the way,like you could try it and be
like, yeah, that didn't reallywork, let me probably something else.
(22:40):
Absolutely, and that the book isan invitation you really get to know yourself
again. And I'm so glad youbrought that up because I also say that
about goals and dreams, like justbecause it was your dream ten years ago
does not mean that you have tostick with it. You can decide you
want something new or something different.You can decide that rituals that work for
you in one season don't serve youin the next. All of those things
can change for me. My preparationseason in the winter, being an East
(23:03):
Coast girl looks very different than myspring and summer. Right so, even
when I am in preparation or doingdifferent workouts now that it's nice weather,
I tend to want to do everythingoutside. Right now, my numbers white.
Wait, everything looks very different becauseI'm out and about and moving and
walking and doing different things than Ido in the winter where I like to
be warm and I'm doing hot yogaand doing reformer, And so it's okay
(23:25):
to change those things. I evenchange personally. I change my skincare every
season because my skin needs different things, and so we're making all of those
changes, our diets, everything.Why would we say that the same goal
we set for ourselves in one seasonis exactly what we want to do in
the next. Or you have togive yourself permission to evolve, in permission
to just change and want different things. And I love that. And you
(23:48):
can so tie that right in withyour physical stuff, because I see this
with people with when it comes tophysical clutter that shows up in their lives
where they accumulated something because it wasimportant to them, whether it and i'd
say it with kids right like kidshave a hobby or sport that they're interested.
You accumulate all of this stuff andthen they outgrow it or they're not
(24:08):
into it anymore. And it couldgo for adult hobbies or kids. But
for whatever reason, you feel likeI've invested in this or maybe I'll come
back to it, and you holdonto things that maybe it's just time to
let those things go. And youcould look at that in terms of your
(24:29):
time and the way that you're spendingit and the physical things and where you're
giving your attention the people that you'releaning into, the relationships. Again,
I talk a lot about that aswell, like relationships that serve you well
in one season might be time suckingin another phase of your life. Absolutely,
and that I actually have a relationshipLedger in the book that asks you
(24:52):
asks you to really look at that, and we have a principle in the
book that says you can't make withdrawsor you haven't made deposits, and we
literally have a like deposits and withdrawalsLedger, so that you can take some
of it about that because I agreewith you, like our relationships are the
most important thing that you know,in my opinion, towards achieving work life
(25:14):
harmony. A lot of times ifwe're out of saying or out of that
harmony, it's because a relationship isoff at some point. But there are
different types of relationships. I inviteyou to look at, whether it's friend
tours, over mentors, your personalboard of directors like your Fab five,
and I really dive into the differenttypes of relationships we can all experience because
it's not a one size fits all, And I think the more you understand
(25:37):
where everyone fits in your life,the better you are at managing your time,
managing your energy, managing expectations andall of that contributes to work life
harmony. I love it. Ilove all about it. What is your
I'm just thinking again of the startwe were talking before we before we hit
record, about like the people whowatch and listen to our show, and
(26:00):
we run the spectrum similar to yourdemographic, primarily women. All those shout
out to all the men that dolisten to our show, but we have
a large demographic of women who arejust feeling like they're in the weeds with
things. And I remember the conversationsthat I've had with people that are just
like I've got my husband travels,or I'm a single mom, and I
(26:22):
like finding that five minutes where somebodyisn't tugging at my leg or my phone
isn't blowing up. It's really hardand carving out that time for myself to
do those have that recreation time.What are some can you give some like
real practical examples of where maybe somebodycan start, because I think sometimes when
(26:45):
you're so in the weed, youcan't even see I don't even where to
begin now. And I my cowriter and my Stephanie Smith are really thoughtful,
and when I started to put togetherthe principles, the first thing is.
It was important to me that everyprinciple for instant elevation be something that
costs you no money, right ifyou choose to find but I'm telling you
to move, I'm not telling youwhat type of workout will how to move
(27:08):
what it caught like movement cannon shouldbe free. Right. And the other
piece that was really important to meis that everything I was suggesting you could
start with just a five minute investment, right, because we are talking about
women who are incredibly busy. WhenI think about my demographic and the women
I'm really writing and speaking too,I like to almost call it's like a
(27:30):
sandwich generation because we're sandwiched between takingcare of children and eight parents totally at
that grab. On both sides,parents are aging and the emotional toll that's
being taken there and raising children thatis incredibly time consuming. It's work that
we love to do on both sides, and so you're not upset about either,
(27:53):
but it is taking time away.I remember when I was in my
marketing days, I was working ona client who had a business and incontinence
completely unrelated, and I read thestatistic that really changed the game for me.
But it was just a study ofa done that said that on average,
women in general are doing an extrathirty hours of caregiving per month,
(28:14):
per week sorry, and women ofcolor even more. And I thought,
Okay, we're telling women carve outspace for your you take two hours a
day to do your workout, drybrushing, all the things great that we
want you to do, and beyonda full time job, you are doing
thirty additional hours. So even thinkabout those who are working in the home,
you are still giving an additional thirtyhours of your week to other types
(28:37):
of care outside anything you're doing inyour home. When we want to say,
now make time for you. Forso many people if they want to
sleep, where is the time comingfrom? But literally as an eist in
the calendar, so you can't makethat up. And so that's where I
really thought, Okay, five minutes. What time each day can we all
own? When the first thing thatcame to me was the commute to work.
(29:02):
If you are commuting, what canyou do if you're not commuting and
you're just spending a few minutes inthe morning, I like to put my
guilty pleasure. One of my ritualsin the morning is my customized news briefing,
right, like my Alexa to talkto me, tell me what's going
on while I'm doing all the things. So I'm like making use of that
time. I feel really informed.It's part of my preparation base that starts
(29:22):
in my morning. But what arethose things? And if you can just
give yourself five minutes, I thinkthe idea of thirty minutes an hour can
be incredibly overwhelming to really busy people. I will tell you For me,
my recreation in the afternoon felt alittle indulgent at first, until I realized
it was really helping me bring mywork together and was really impacting my work
(29:45):
in a very positive way. Sosome of these things, I do think
you have to take five minutes orjust try it out to see if it
works for you, because it's reallyhard to get to the point of saying
I'm going to just take this houror take my lunch break later and do
this thing instead. If you haven'ttried any you don't see it's working for
you. I think you bring upa really good point that it doesn't have
to be a specific, rigid timeduring the day. So if you know
(30:11):
that you are, your mornings arecrazy, right, And because you've got
you're commuting, you've got multiple kidsgoing to different school at different times or
what and again, and I don'tmean to be speaking. There's people that
are listening that don't have kids athome, but I just I'm just thinking
about my own life when I wasin the crazy seasons of just feeling like
(30:33):
I don't have any time. Maybeyour time is at eleven in the morning,
do you know what I mean?Maybe your time is at three o'clock
in the afternoon. Maybe that's whenyou have your five minutes. So I
think we put ourselves in these Weoften draw these like conclusions where there's specific
buckets of you need to do havea morning routine, you have a nighttime
routine, but maybe your routine islate morning. You just say I'm going
(30:59):
to whatever, go for a walkaround the block, or I'm going to
do my dry brushing, and thatis your time. So I think it's
important to whatever that is. Findjust like we talk about I talk a
lot about your peak productivity time,like when you are trying to do productive
things. Some people are mourning people, some people are night owls. Find
your people are activity time. Inthis case, look at where it can
(31:22):
organically, because the lesson you needto do is try to make more work
for yourself. As you want thisto not be another thing on your to
do list. Is this should besomething that is recharging you, not adding
to the depletion. Absolutely, andI love that idea. That's why I
tell everyone I'm going to ask youa lot of questions. You're going to
(31:42):
really get to know yourself, andthat is part of the journey is saying,
like, when do my rituals fitin? What does decluttering look like?
Even down to what are the numbersthat you want to pay attention to?
What numbers do you want to beaccountable to. One of my accountability
numbers is my sleep score. Everyday. I was the person that would
say I'm getting enough sleep, I'mgetting enough sleep. And then I finally
started wearing this little device that tracksmy sleep. And at first I was
(32:07):
like completely hort by by what Iconsidered enough sleep and like my body wasn't
really reaching readiness. And when Ireally started to think through that, I'm
like, oh, okay, Ineed to make some changes. We all
have data that matters to us.It's a very specific experience, and so
I love what you're talking about,because that is really what work life harmony
is about. It's about figuring outwhat works for you, and only you
(32:30):
know that, and only you knowwhat doesn't work for you as well.
Yeah. Absolutely, And I reallyI love the fact that your framework,
it gives you a framework, butyet it's fluid enough to say you could
adapt this. It's not putting youin this specific bucket or box that you
(32:52):
have to subscribe to do these stepsthis way in order to achieve it.
Because again, our goals are different, our lives are different, and what,
like you said, what we need, like what defines my level of
rest and restoration might be very differentthan somebody else's. Absolutely, and that
(33:14):
also that's why you'll be able tostick with this plan, right, because
it is you have co created itfor yourself. Right. I might be
giving you a framework, but thenyou've taken that framework and actually built out
what works for you, versus gettingsomething from someone else where you're like,
this doesn't fit, and this doesn'tfit. It's note, this is a
process where you can literally layer inevery single thing that will work and fit
(33:35):
for you to help you have thatwork life harmony. All right, So
on that note, because I couldkeep talking to you for hours and hours.
But on that note, tell ourlisteners where they can obviously buy the
book, but where can they findyou? Connect up all the things?
Yeah, so you can find meat Tina Wells dot com. I'm also
on Instagram at Tina Wells. Ihave a weekly newsletter where I sh share
(33:58):
a lot of tips and trick someblogs all related to the Elevation approach.
And of course you can find Elevationby Tina Wells, which is a home
office line of products exclusively at Target. So we're in over fo yeaha and
Target dot com which is so awesomereally, I love it. And again
we will link to all things Tinain our show notes. So if you're
(34:22):
in the car, on the treadmill, out taking a walk wherever, don't
worry about it. We got youcovered. Just go to our podcast page
or wherever you're listening to this episodeand we will have all the things Tina
related there for you. So we'regoing to take a quick break and then
when we come back, we're justgoing to put you in the hot seat
(34:43):
for our wrap up questions. Sosit tight, hey, parents, If
you are drowning in a sea ofpapers, projects and archo masterpieces. I
have got a solution for you,and contrar to what you might think,
it is not to throw everything out. I know that the end of year
year is crunch time when all thoselockers, cubbies, everything gets cleaned out,
(35:05):
the backpacks and all the stuff ofwhat do I keep? What do
I save? Gets dumped on yourkitchen table. So if that is you,
I have got a solution for you. My friend Denise Alright has created
an incredible product called the class Keeper. And I know I've talked about when
my girls were younger, I hada binder with protective sheets where I would
(35:28):
just go through and keep the stuffthat I thought they might want to look
back on one day, as opposedto just either throwing everything out or dumping
everything into just tubs and handing itoff to them. Denise took my idea
and elevated it into an actual product, and it's got different sleeves and categories,
and there's all different designs, andthere's a digital version as well for
(35:49):
Hello parents of the twenty first century, so you can digitize your kids keepsakes
and artworks. And it's also somethingthat is a project that you can assign
to the kids, depending on howold they are, if you want to
when they come home, say hey, I want you to sort through this
pile of stuff and decide which onesdo you want to keep it, what
do you want to get rid of. Not only is it taking something off
(36:10):
of your plate, but is empoweringyour kids to make some decisions and use
their critical thinking skills. So Ilove that idea. The other thing I
want to talk to you about isDenise's other product, which has to do
with art, chore charts and responsibilities. As the summer changes and we have
(36:30):
a lot of times the kids homeand we want to have them pitching around
the house, we're not really surehow to go about motivating them. It's
often a really hard thing to do. And through Denise's Earn and Learn product
line, she's got a bunch ofdifferent chore charts with they're all non dated.
(36:51):
It's fifty two pages, I think, and you can customize it to
whatever it is that you want.So it could be taking out the trash,
could be making your bed, loading, unloading the dishwasher, vacuuming,
sweeping, whatever it is, walkingthe dog, and all of these you
can decide either our point value.You can decide some sort of reward system,
but I really love it because itallows you to get the kids involved
(37:13):
and a really fun way, becauseher products are bright and colorful and really
engaging, especially for those younger kidswhere they have that visual stimulation as opposed
to just being like wa wah wah, I have to do all these shores.
Denise has offered an incredible discount exclusivelyfor our listeners of this Organized life
podcast and followers. Will simply beIf you go to Denise Albright dot com
(37:37):
and you punch in the code simplythirty, that's simp y thirty at checkout,
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these are great gifts that are practical, useful, and fun for the kids.
And again, if you get theminvolved in this, it makes it
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(37:59):
more off of your plate, whichis a win win for everybody. So
visit Denise Alright dot com, DE N I S E A L Bright
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your entire order. All right,Tina, This has been great. I
know I'm inspired and charged up,and I try to reader our guests books
(38:22):
before they come on the show,but I haven't read yours. And I
absolutely am going to buy it assoon as we're done, because I love
it and I love all the things. I love any time that somebody can
put together options and solutions for people. So thank you so much for doing
this. Speaking of books, sowe always ask our guests a few wrap
(38:44):
up questions. The first one hasto do with books of inspiration. Obviously,
you've put out a book that isinspiring other people. But is there
a book that you either continually goback to yourself or that you refer to
other people that's had a big impactor transformative play in your life that you
(39:05):
can share with our listeners. Yeah, I guess I would go to two
books first, would be Good toGreat. I think it's just a classic,
and I think it really for mestarting out in business, it was
just such a good read to understandthe difference between a good company and a
great company. Okay, I justthink personally, I love Marie Fourlio's Everything
is figure Outable. Yeah, Ijust think that's something we always need to
(39:27):
remind ourselves, and my dad usedalways tell me growing up that if you
fail to plan, you plan tofail. And so I think the idea
of planning and just knowing that Ican get a plan around, if I
can get some thought around it,I can figure it out. And so
I think Marie's book is just agreat reminder to all of us, You're
going to figure this out. Yeah, I love it so true. I'm
like Marie fourlio fans, So Ithink that's awesome. We will put those
(39:51):
in and we have a whole goodReads list of all of our of our
books, so everyone go check thoseout, Okay. And then our last
two questions that we've asked every yessince the start of our show, is
in this particular season of your life, where do you feel the most organized?
And where do you feel like alittle bit of a hot mess.
And I'm going to make you surewith the hot mess, because I don't
(40:13):
like ending on a mess moment.Where do you feel like you're a little
out of out of my hot mess? So I believe in like when it
comes to decluttering, you need tohave a landing zone and if you can
get that thing cleaned, everything feelsclean right now. And so I say
my hot mess is like my islandis my landing zone, and I have
(40:34):
a corner of it that feels asclean as it like it to be right
now, So that that is myhot mess. And then what do I
think I'm doing well calendar clutter?I think my calendar recently and just figuring
out, like carving out the spaceand time I need and making sure I'm
getting those things in there that Ineed to have and saying no one of
(40:57):
the things that aren't working right now. It's I think I'm doing well with
the calendar. Awesome, I loveit. That's great, Tina. It's
been such a pleasure shotting with you. Thank you so much for coming on
our show and sharing your wisdom withour community. Here. If you're new
to our show, welcome. We'reso happy that your yere. Make sure
to click the subscribe follow button.We've got well over three hundred plus episodes
(41:22):
on all things about physical clutter,calendar clutter, emotional clutter, or digital
clutter, all anything that you canimagine. And of course, like I
said, we have our new Monday'sTip of the Week, so lots to
see. Listen here and do ourshow. So thank you so much.
I'll be back next week for anotherepisode of This Organized Life. Until then,
(41:43):
I'm Lauri Palau. Peace out.Thanks for tuning in. If you'd
liked this episode, please spread thelove and share it with your friends.
If this is your first time joiningus, make sure to click the subscribe
button wherever you're real listing so younever miss an episode. And while you're
there, please leave us a reviewso other people knew that our show is
worth to listen. You can alsofind us on YouTube and Instagram at This
Organized Life podcast, and if you'dlike to connect with us, you can
(42:06):
head on over to our website atsimply the letterb like boy organized dot com,
which is filled with tons of resources, including free downloads, checklists,
links to our amazing organizing partners,and all of our digital offerings. I'll
see you next week for another episodeof This Organized Life
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