Untoxicated Podcast

Untoxicated Podcast

Sheri and Matt Salis just wanted a normal life – normal marriage, normal careers, a normal house and happy kids. Instead, they lived a life of lies and terror as they struggled with Matt’s alcoholism. While their experience sounds rare, with over 15 millions problem drinkers in America, their alcoholic marriage was all too normal. Matt has been writing about their experiences in alcoholism and recovery for years. On the Untoxicated Podcast, Sheri and Matt talk about it, too. No subjects are off limits as the couple discusses the trauma of active addiction, the pain of early recovery, the destruction and rebuilding of trust, and the impact on their intimate relationship. If you love an alcoholic, the disease will terrorize your relationship. We hope you’ll listen and find healing in our shared stories. For more support from Sheri and Matt, check out their Echoes of Recovery program providing connection and healing for the loved ones of alcoholics.

Episodes

October 16, 2025 6 mins
New from Sober and Unashamed: “Bizarre at the Boathouse, Part 2” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Bizarre at the Boathouse, Part 2” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To r...
Mark as Played
Sex in a committed partnership should never be considered obligatory. Sex should be earned, and on this episode, Sheri and Matt discuss the sequence of events that leads to mutually satisfying sex. If there is drinking in your relationship that is blamed on the lack of sex, this episode is for you. Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit fro...
Mark as Played
New from Sober and Unashamed: “Bizarre at the Boathouse, Part 1” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Bizarre at the Boathouse, Part 1” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To r...
Mark as Played
Lundy Bancroft is the author of the world's best selling book on domestic violence titled, "Why Does He Do That?" He has spent the last three decades counseling men who abuse and consulting with their victims. On this episode, Lundy explains that, "An active alcoholic will never deal with his abusiveness," and about a million other fascinating aspects of all kinds of abuse. We bet you'll be surprised by some of the control and mani...
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October 2, 2025 10 mins
New from Sober and Unashamed: “Progress” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Progress” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and U...
Mark as Played
September 29, 2025 82 mins
Our society has changed dramatically in the last century, and the gender gap has been almost completely eliminated. But our culture still has some catching up to do. Sheri and Matt explore the concept of emotional masculinity, taking emotional safety to the next level. If you are a man trying to figure out your role or identity, this conversation is for you. Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you lo...
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September 25, 2025 14 mins
New from Sober and Unashamed: “Yummy Summer of Turd” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Yummy Summer of Turd” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, ...
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September 22, 2025 78 mins
From high school through young adulthood, the pressure felt by people in their teens and 20s is unlike anything experienced by preceding generations. Sheri and Matt offer evidence of the enormous stress of entering adulthood, speculate about the causes, and discuss what we all can do to alleviate the pressure (hint: we can't wait for government policy intervention). Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. I...
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New from Sober and Unashamed: “Rubber Stamping a Toxic Culture” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Rubber Stamping a Toxic Culture” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To rea...
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September 15, 2025 68 mins
There is comfort in assigning the blame for relationship dysfunction and emotional abuse on the alcohol or the addiction. But what if we could make a cultural shift to prevent the need for blame and  shame? Sheri and Matt discuss what would happen if we added emotional abuse to the list of behaviors that cross a clear red line. Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and y...
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September 11, 2025 8 mins
New from Sober and Unashamed: “Senseless Urgency” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Senseless Urgency” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check ...
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Lara Hammock is a licenced clinical social worker and mental health therapist working with both individuals and couples. She is creative and inventive, and Lara joins Sheri and Matt to share her COME-TO method to complain constructively. Listeners who like a great acronym, and love to hear Sheri tell it like it is, will enjoy hearing Sheri process a real life complaint she has about Matt. Check out all the tools Lara shares on her ...
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September 4, 2025 13 mins
New from Sober and Unashamed: “A.B.D.” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “A.B.D.” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unash...
Mark as Played
September 1, 2025 61 mins
Even when done with loving intent, restriction and control does not lead to the desired results of obedience and conformity: restriction leads to rebellion. Just ask anyone ever who has tried to control someone else's drinking. Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of ...
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New from Sober and Unashamed: “Good Morning, Gorgeous” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Good Morning, Gorgeous” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much mo...
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August 25, 2025 77 mins
Sheri answers listener questions about everything from her rock-bottom moments that resulted from Matt's alcoholism, to what she would do differently if she had the chance to do it all over again. Many answers are emotional because learning and surviving are both painful. Matt lightens things up by starting the episode with a riddle, and an analysis of why people feel unconditional love for their pets. If you love or loved an alco...
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New from Sober and Unashamed: “Dudes on the Struggle Bus” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Dudes on the Struggle Bus” To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.
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Evolutionary Psychologist Dr. Menelaos Apostolou does research around this unfortunate historical fact: Until sometime in the past 100 years, men had all the sexual power in most cultures around the world. The traditional power dynamic will come as no surprise to our listeners. However, on this episode, Sheri and Matt discuss some disturbing theoretical evolutionary impacts of that inequity that will plague us humans well into the ...
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August 14, 2025 12 mins
New from Sober and Unashamed: “Courtesy Flush” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Courtesy Flush” To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.
Mark as Played
We're not rooting for divorce, we are rooting for people to be treated with respect. And in the absence of respect, we are rooting for people to extract themselves from a toxic situation. After they talk through all the relationship problems in recovery, Matt the Gnat makes plans to haul around Sheri's Cat Cuddle Bus. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, ple...
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