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April 4, 2025 73 mins

In this episode of the Why Intervention Podcast, Christopher Doyle and Kirsten Cobabe dive deep into the turbulent waters of teen development and addiction risk. Kirsten draws from over two decades of experience guiding parents through the challenges of adolescence to reveal the hidden connections between brain development, parenting approaches, and addiction vulnerability.

Beyond the typical "just say no" advice, this conversation explores why teens make the decisions they do, how parents can maintain influence during these critical years, and the powerful protective factors that can prevent addiction before it starts. What emerges is a masterclass in understanding the teen brain and building the kind of relationship that keeps communication open even when the stakes are highest.

You'll discover exactly what's happening in your teenager's mind, why traditional approaches often backfire spectacularly, and the specific conversational techniques that transform parent-teen relationships from battlegrounds to lifelines. This isn't just information—it's a roadmap for connection when it matters most.

WARNING: What you're about to discover might forever change how you speak to your teenager…

Guest’s Info

Kirsten Cobabe is a former therapist turned coach, specializing in supporting families navigate the waves of adolescence. For over two decades, she has guided parents in learning how to listen to, and talk with, their teens. She engages parents in personal reflection, embracing their evolving role, understanding the teen brain and restoring harmony in the home. In recognizing this unique stage of development, her hope is to bridge the widening gap between parents and their children, creating timeless bonds. Through compassionate guidance, intentional strategies and a tailored approach, Kirsten empowers families to pilot these pivotal years with deeper awareness. Her work is not just about addressing immediate concerns, but about lighting the path to a more empowered future, ensuring that today's challenges become the foundation for tomorrow's brighter relationships. Kirsten works with parents, teens and the entire family constellation with a holistic lens, starting with what is already working.

Highlights

  • The shocking truth about your teen's brain and why expecting them to "just make better decisions" is like expecting a car with no brakes to stop safely
  • Why your teenager might be HARDWIRED to seek thrills that terrify you (and the counterintuitive way smart parents can channel this energy)
  • The "substitute prefrontal cortex" technique that helps teens navigate risk without destroying their lives in the process
  • Why some teens try substances once and walk away while others spiral into addiction – the answer isn't what most "experts" claim
  • The emotional detection system every teenager possesses that allows them to "read" your true feelings (even when you think you're hiding them perfectly)
  • The counterintuitive reason why your teenager's complaints and negativity are actually GOLDEN OPPORTUNITIES you should never shut down
  • Why "Connect Before Correct" might be the three most important words any parent of a teen will ever hear
    The devastating childhood experiences that dramatically increase addiction vulnerability (and the surprising protective factor that can neutralize them)
  • How to be the person your teen WANTS to talk to about the scary, dangerous, confusing parts of their life
  • The tragic mistake well-meaning parents make when setting boundaries around substance use (and what to do instead)

This conversation offers something truly valuable – practical wisdom that strengthens the parent-teen relationship and builds the resilience young people need to navigate adolescence successfully. The tools shared here don't just help prevent problems

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