DELUSIONAL

¿En qué creemos? ¿Cómo nos afecta nuestro sistema de creencias en nuestra vida diaria? ¿Lo que pasa en mi entorno es realidad o percepción? Son algunas preguntas que Alan nos responde en este episodio.

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Uy Peli a gay podcast. WhoHello, if you don' t know
my name is Wullson Paulino and togetherwith Fernando sa See who my partner has
been for fifteen years and a companionwho isn' t encouraging val We talk
every week serious and often not soserious issues, with the simple idea of
entertaining and educating you at the sametime. If that' s possible,
yes, that' s possible.Alan the clinical psychologist connective, behavioral,

(00:23):
is a therapist who always goes tohis practice in evidence and with a gender
and human rights perspective, Hi Alanhow you are Hello, good morning a
day. Oh, all right.Ala, what pronoun do you identify yourself
with, sorry, what pronoun doyou identify yourself with? He' s
fine, yeah, perfect, perfectproblem. And Alan' s here,

(00:45):
like I said, clinical psychologist andbehavioral emotional and he' s gonna talk
to us about a subject that Ihonestly don' t know much, but
maybe we' re not going.But it' s about belief systems,
and before we talk about that,we have to define it. Then they
go ahead and ask you what beliefsystems are. We can usually think that

(01:07):
we do not know them, butin reality I think that we base our
lives on much of these belief systems, which is nothing but the rules,
the laws, yes, these internaldiscourses that seem to be present at every
moment of our life. For example, black color is a color that goes

(01:27):
well with me, that I likevery much, and then it is an
internalized rule that adds to this complexbelief system. And I put it into
practice in my day- to-day life. So practically that, it
' s not just already religious beliefsystem, nor political ideals. I mean,

(01:49):
it goes from the simplest to themost complex. Yes, that'
s right, that' s rightand what kind of beliefs exist uff To
begin with, let' s understandone thing. Belief is thus called belief
and differs to the best from otherinner discourses, such as thoughts, such
as ideas, because beliefs are believedin them. Then there' s like

(02:16):
a thought. You can get thereand you can tell I don' t
know this ah looks interesting that car, no, or it looks interesting that
blues shirt to clothes in general.No, because a thought is a question,
it' s a speech and beliefis something that you believe in,

(02:37):
in what you don' t evenquestion anymore. No, then you see
an example, the iPhone, becauseit can tell you brands here, yes,
yes, yes, then you looksomething like the iPhone and it'
s a type of cell phone brandand you say I need it. And
then it' s already a beliefthat you grow up, someone questions you,

(03:00):
because it' s as if itisn' t, it' s
necessary for me. Then there arebeliefs. We are going to infinite and
there are beliefs that we can defineeven as beliefs, some more rational than
others, for example, some moreunderstandable than others, some more realistic than
others. So, there are manytypes of credences in general, but for

(03:23):
example, in conductive cognitive therapy,which is what I work with, we
talk a lot about these beliefs thatcan be healthy and these beliefs that are
not so healthy and that you haveto start modifying. You can give an
example of unhealthy beliefs that I canidentify in everyday life on a personal level.

(03:44):
I gave it to you right nowas an example in this cell phone
thing, like a question you sayI need a specific type of cell phone,
because you don' t need it, or it' s not necessary,
or it' s easy for youto get laid. It' s
a perfect example, because I wasgoing to answer you by telling you,
but give me one that isn't healthy, because the cell phone is

(04:06):
needed. I was already going totell you exactly that no and we'
re actually going to understand, forexample, it' s something that'
s done a lot in therapy,not understand what it' s really about
a need, something necessary, it' s something that makes life easier for
you and the cell phone makes iteasier for you to live, but it

(04:28):
doesn' t make life easier foryou. It doesn' t make it
easy for you, for example,maybe a camera will invite the best,
for example, a certain status because, because what the cell phone does also
does is done by another cell type. But it seems like our head isn
' t the way I need itand I don' t care if I
don' t have money, I' m going to owe you or get

(04:49):
high, I' m going todo it for Acá, for Mexico,
and I' m going to spendso many thousands of pesos on this cell
phone. And we simply spend them, because I know that we may not
have economic stability. We' redetailing other things. That money can be
invested in mental health, in physicalhealth. This one and then we forget
this part. Not because this beliefbecomes a determinant of what we have to

(05:09):
follow. Fernando spoke at the beginningthat they are not only religious or political
beliefs, but I want to askyou and confirm with you. Religious and
political beliefs count as types of beliefsat the level such as systems, beliefs
at the psychological level. Of course, of course, yes, and there

(05:30):
is also debate. I think we' ve seen it a lot in the
movies in the series. No,as sometimes such beliefs can lead to inappropriate
behaviors. It would be very goodto be called in Netflix speaking is a
documentary, which speaks of a certaintype of church. Not and as they

(05:54):
force their members of this church toperform certain actions that are inadequate for their
physical and mental well- being,then it is a religious belief that perhaps
has a foundation in a history oflife of an entire people, but that
sometimes is no longer, is nolonger healthy, is no longer up to

(06:16):
date, is obsolete And it hasto be changed, it has to be
modified to be its own. Andhow can a belief system affect how we
see life, because you now speak, for example, of a certain kind
of mentality, for example sectarian one, that begins precisely with a system of
religious or spiritual belief. How aglobal belief system can affect a human being

(06:39):
' s life And according to myexperience, because of course, many psychologists
so to say other things, whenthat belief system is so inflexible, it
starts to be annoying. I mean, when I' m not capable of

(07:00):
questioning that belief, when I'm not able to determine if it'
s applicable to my living moment.It' s starting to get annoying,
it' s starting to get awkward. It is already painful for some people,
that is, I am a Catholic, for example, and in Catholicism
there are many rules, many beliefsthat can come a few years ago.

(07:24):
But, for example, it isnot a problem for me to go every
February to visit the Santo Niño deAtocha, in the city of Niño Sacátecas.
This one on a pilgrimage, walkingthrough me, revealing me, raising
me will send her. For meit is not a problem and it is
a belief that becomes healthy, becauseit enriches my spirituality. But it turns

(07:46):
out that I don' t knowmy doctor tells me hey you can'
t get up at four in themorning and start walking at such temperatures,
so you can' t follow thepilgrimage, this march. And then I
say to myself like I can't I mean, I have to go
it becomes inflexible the belief, becauseand there is a justification behind it,

(08:07):
completely valid, because if I don' t go, then I' m
not good enough Christian. So I' m not a good enough believer,
I' m not a good enoughson, brother. And we' re
going further back. And then itstarts to be so inflexible that I don
' t mind risking my physical healthhaving to comply with this rule. It

(08:28):
' s normal for us to behonest, I mean, he shows up.
But if I pass you do notgo, that is, the Pope
does not come, the Pope himselfgives you absolution just by going to the
pilgrimage. But I believe that God, who is so good and so loving,
is not from your perspective, forhe will understand what he cannot on
this occasion. And that' swhen the problem starts. But the inability

(08:50):
to ask questions but wing then howor the question would be can a person
realize when his belief system is limitlessand affects him, because if you are
telling me a person in the exampleyou gave, he will justify with valid
reasons for him that his belief systemis functional and active. It' s

(09:13):
good to be consistent. So howa human being, an individual, can
realize that his belief system is clear, because a person who has an inflexible
belief system can fall into believing thatwhat he is doing is for his clear
good. Then, or you needcomplete help from an outsider or a person

(09:33):
who knows these topics to identify them, yes, and these spaces, for
example, ok. I think socialnetworks are untied, tiktok and all that.
But in the end, what thesekind of spaces do is open our
minds and say little, it's, it' s wrong, I
mean, there' s little.I have to question myself. Yeah,

(09:56):
what I' m thinking is right, wrong. No. So I think
that one of the great advantages ofthe globalization of communication is that we can
already hear other experiences, after otherthings, of other ideas, ways of
thinking of others and of others.And that' s when this process of
realizing me begins, if there appearsto be an discomfort that in clinical psychology

(10:20):
is known as a symptom. Itseems to me that there is an discomfort
that I have to pay attention to, because it turns out that this one
doesn' t know if I boughtthe iPhone, for example, but because
I don' t feel well.I' m very anxious about all the
spending I' ve done. Ifeel anxious to know if I will be

(10:41):
able to pay or not, becauseI took it out sometimes without interest with
the credit card this and this discomfortappears. I can' t sleep.
Sometimes I go out on the streetand I get a little scared because I
have such an expensive device and allthis is so upset that maybe we don

(11:01):
' t pay attention to it.But that' s something we have to
listen to, because at the endof the day it' s your life
telling you listen here there' sa change that you have to make clear,
of course, that starts clear outthere I heard that if it'
s not a topic, it's not a problem. So if it
already becomes a topic because it meansthat there is something that is affecting you,
as it is said, not atopic, that is to say if

(11:22):
there is not something that you tellher that there is so much head in
your life as there is no problembecause you don' t think so much
about it, that is, itdoesn' t have so much to look
at. Now yes, you beginto have a lot of attention for something
that yes, indeed, is howyou begin to read, say I can,
start reading and start talking bad.And that' s not so good

(11:43):
anymore. And then, if youdon' t realize it, you'
re told by the clear exterior.The people you live with these people at
work, family, couple friends,they tell you hear this like it'
s not right and that and theystart putting limits and then these limits tell
you like then I have to dosomething. The problem comes a little when

(12:07):
people do not receive these limits.That' s why it' s good
to put limits on others, becausethe problem comes when no one says anything
to them and everyone tells them andthe person doesn' t even notice.
Maybe the case, for example,quickly with a personality disorder And if it
' s ringing a lot, notthe narcsite personality disorder is egosynthonic, that

(12:28):
is, they don' t realizethere' s a problem. The people
from outside come tell them listen wait, you can' t treat hasi to
others even justify themselves and they sayclearly that I can because it' s
me or I am me and Ican do what I want and that'
s when the others come penden beginto set these limits and already start reading

(12:50):
no and it becomes the theme asI played dinner. I wanted to ask
you if a person with a disorderhas been compulsive, for example, who
creates a pattern of behavior to turnoff and learn to lu five times or
left the room so often or thebase to the hand so many times.
That becomes a belief system. Thoseare pure behaviors of a person with a

(13:13):
disorder if you look. There aremany explanatory theories of psychological disorders. Many
I speak to you from my scheme, from what I know, from my
system of credences, which is thechemical psychology that TiVo contacts. Then all
behavior is based on a thought ina credence. A lot of people say

(13:37):
I didn' t think when Idid. I don' t do it
without thinking about it anymore. Ourhead processes a lot of information. So
he' s always thinking and sometimeshe doesn' t think such elaborate things,
sometimes he thinks repetitive things, asin the case of the other perfrops.
I' m still compulsive. It' s like I have to wash
my hands, I get dirty,I have to wash my hands and then

(13:58):
I do the completion. Then it' s automatic. The credence is so
grounded in it that the person needsto take it here. But just as
there are these explanations of reasoning,complusive, there are others. What I
say is not the law of life. So the same and there is also
psychoanalytic theory, other theories such asthat they can also be important to understand

(14:20):
this type of disorders or disorders.So, this I could tell you that,
from my experience and from what Ihave worked just, for example,
with the TOC, there is asystem of super inflexible beliefs about how it
should be day to day. Okand I wanted to ask you then that

(14:43):
inflexible belief system there' s away, because I don' t know
if there' s a way tobreak it in a general way or a
very individual approach. In each casethere is very individual, very individual,
because it is like clinical psychology,it is like any area of medicine.

(15:09):
Yeah, so, while there's a procedure, for example, in
orthodoxy, to put your brackers onyou are brakes, not what it'
s called b then this one,if there' s a procedure to put
it in general, but I can' t get in with you and enforce

(15:35):
a manual, like, even ifit' s an individual first review of
your life story or in this case, take some pictures, take some X
- rays and then determine how thewhole process is going to be. Also
then, while there is a theoreticalframework that tells us how to treat touch
the clinician' s work, andthat' s where a little bit of

(15:58):
direct criticism begins some pseudos is likelife coach, because they want to chlorate
a lot of people. One thingto allege here is personal attention. It
is clear then, the knock likeany other mental disorder, requires this individual
analysis and understand and validate the experienceof each person, because all people are

(16:21):
different and clinical psychologists must work fromthis perspective of diversity. So, yes,
of course, of course, it' s not like the exact horoscope
and a little question as it's supposed, the ideal thing is for

(16:41):
us to learn how to manage ouremotions. There is a way to manage
belief systems or beliefs. In fact, there' s a lot of attention
to what you just asked for.Normally my patients come with me and they
don' t tell me I havethis belief and I want to change them.
They usually say I' m veryangry and I want to stop pissing
her off. Sure. So,I think we' ve focused a little

(17:04):
bit poorly. We' ve beena little bit easy, that is,
regulating your emotions. But, becausethat emotion is equal a consequence of a
belief I don' t know.For example, I get very angry,
but because my head is the onlything I know, which is the only
way I can react when something Idon' t like. Sure, my

(17:26):
head is like that. So this, for example, comes my partner and
tells me listen this I don't know who you dated last night,
and that automatically pisses me off becausethere' s a belief that tells me
that I can' t, thatyou can' t ask me who I

(17:47):
was dating last night and then wethink there' s no other emotional repertoire
with which to react. So,actually, it' s thoughts that are
regulated. No, no, no, emotions. Emotions are natural, Your
emotions are completely healthy. You haveevery right to get angry when your partner
asks you who I went out withtonight, that is, because he'

(18:07):
s invading your privacy, but youdon' t have the right to the
best thing to go all night long, snuff him all night long just because
you didn' t like what heasked you. That' s aggression now.
And then, that' s whenwhat you have to regulate is this
belief, which tells you that theonly way you can react when someone is
interfering a little bit in your privacyis to be aggressive, not then a

(18:33):
little bit. So what we doa lot of work is that there is
an internal discourse that has to bemodified. From inner discourse you are leading
yourself to act the form you acton, that is, emotions are a
consequence of that belief system. So, therefore, what we have to regulate
is that belief system not necessarily theanswer. Yeah, like this. That
' s right. In fact,there is a cognitive model known as the

(18:56):
ABC model. It is the generalB and the B General is an event,
this event is an event that youcannot control. What happened that by
chance of destiny God the gold,so you want to be me and that
' s how I' m goingto evaluate that event, because, from

(19:18):
my belief systems, without these pastexperiences, that' s the B no,
then it' s a love breakup. It' s an event that
happened you didn' t want itclear, but because your partner gave himself,
I don' t want to bewith you. And then, from
your history of abandonment and rejection andthings like that, you start to assess
the situation and you say I'm not going to be able to live

(19:41):
with another abandonment but a cimentary credence. How you' re going to feel
how a person would feel with thiscompletely downgraded belief. Of course it will
be next door and then there comesfaith the consequences. So it' s
a B and a C. VAthen it is important that we understand it
so that we know what to do. We can' t act on it.

(20:03):
It' s an event with whichwe don' t have control or
inside the Parón. Yeah, butwe can work on B, because it
looks like that' s what's with us. A little bit deregulating
emotionally, generating inappropriate behaviors and evenat times, generating a physical discomfort,
stomach color, head, muscle attention, lack of sleep, lack of exact

(20:26):
appetite. Thank you, and Iwant to pause why, Fernando, because
we need money, because we needmoney, we return in a second.
I want to thank Sarah Santos nowthat we are back, which is another
of the bosses we currently have,one of the sixty- one bosses we
currently have. If you don't know what I' m talking about

(20:49):
between Patreon com Slash Wil Freeland andyou, you' re going to realize
that you' re going to receivesome special videos episodes before the other gifts
for being first pattern or for rrimer time is to be pattern and with
your help, in cash, helpthis program continue thanks to those who are
already pattern patrons like Slash Wilfireland Alanbefore innora pause. You weren' t

(21:11):
talking about an ABC model of howwe process events. You could say then
the B would be like that beliefsystem, which is like that filter through
which we strained those events. Thatleaves me to say as then belief systems
are life itself or not. Howone can separate what is our life from

(21:34):
what is the belief system. Let' s see if we understand correctly,
we can' t separate him.Okay, okay. We' re,
we' re, we' reacting, that credence system works. Many
people are not a word that makesme a little strong, that is more

(21:55):
programmed. I think it' sone of the scheduled ones. We'
re not machines. We simply learn, have the ease to learn and choose
those beliefs that are more functional andmore comfortable for us. And then the

(22:15):
problem isn' t that belief startsbeing bad from the start because of lobemos,
it' s that belief starts tobecome a little negative as we want
to repeat it. Yes, thenit' s part of life itself and
that' s because we have theability to learn and associate. Not then,

(22:37):
if in the past it' sequal to seeing and right now,
I' m in a situation whereit looks a lot like because I'
m going to feel equal to seeingclear then it' s that way.
We have this ability to learn.We are so complex and so wonderful and
wonderful that we sometimes remember that wehave a lot of capacity for people who

(23:03):
work with cult and cult issues sothey are very strict, they use a
lot. That' s the wordfor programming. Then there is some kind
of therapy to replace or relax thosebelief systems. A person who, for

(23:30):
example, I have a sect thatblinds itself to reality, practically at some
point what can they do? Thereare many therapeutic approaches to working on this
type of topic and especially for peoplewho want to work on it a little

(23:51):
more schematic and especially for people wantto reduce clinical symptoms. Behavioral cognitive therapy
begins with cognitive therapy because the schemas, that is, the belief system that
we talked about from the beginning,are known as cognitive or cognitive schemes.
The cognitive word is the reference tothoughts, ideas and beliefs and behavior to

(24:15):
the behaviors you have to modify.So the rags is to get into that,
but also as it is for therapywith a leading type up to acceptance
and commitment therapy your behavior therapy thatthose new or a little more innovative therapies.
Contextual therapies, behavioral rags help morepeople who have like these problems.

(24:44):
And well, I' m notgoing to put it aside and I think
it' s very important to alsomention that the pharmacological help, which is
the one that a therapist, apsychiatrist, is responsible for, because it
' s also a plus, especiallybecause this help to reduce physical symptoms gives

(25:10):
you a well- being at bestin the short term, but it'
s a complement, because in thelong term you obviously require, to form
new habits, to form new beliefs. And you only do this on the
cake. Clear a little drug.It' s not going to change your
belief system. Not of course not, and we see this even in normal
medicine. That is, you,for example, constantly get sick of the

(25:30):
flu or throat. No. Then, yes, the medication will help you
get back to your normal state.But there' s something wrong there,
there' s, there' sa habit that has to be transformed and
maybe you go out on the streetand don' t bring scarves in cold
season. Then that habit has tobe changed. So that' s the

(25:56):
psychotherapy job. Sure, you talkeda little while ago and let me out
a little bit of a topic andyou talked about the non- self-
centered person, what they call narcissisticand I have the doubt left. So,
then reality for a person can bedifferent from what it really is,

(26:18):
from what that person perceives reality completelydifferently. How you break a belief system
of a narcissistic person, for example. Either it should be done or not.
You should make the patient functional,me as such, and this is

(26:40):
a little limiting and very frustrating.I as such can' t do much
sometimes. That is, the patientshould realize whether there is a more appropriate
belief or that it can help himor her to achieve his or her life
goals more. And the goal isto show him a little bit to do
a cost, benefit, advantage anddisadvantage analysis of what' s going on

(27:02):
and then you tell him to lookat regret you' ve left three wives
or three couples behind. Not yourkids don' t want to be around
you at work. You' rein trouble, and he' s at
risk of getting shot. Your familyis a little far from you because of
the way you are. Then somethinghas to change. It' s not

(27:25):
that they have to change, it' s just, but they' re
not in therapy. You' rehere because you want to work it directly.
Or if you want no, thenyes, then I think the only
thing we can work with you isand we start doing this breakup, this
separation and I go back to thesame thing as we are learning beings.
So it' s a matter ofrelearning how to achieve my goals. Yes,

(27:48):
it seems like I used to doa lot of good to achieve my
goals by blackmailing or manipulating, butno longer, it' s not happening
anymore, because people are understanding thatthat' s violence. And that'
s when we say or want toachieve your mint, because maybe there are
other ways more fame and you teachthe patient, more ways to achieve it.
And that is where a healing processbegins to be seen. Nando I

(28:17):
follow a lady, a doctor namedDr Ramani, who talks a lot about
narcissism and she has mentioned in someinterview that, unfortunately, nacicism is not
cured because precisely they have to realizefirst that they have to have a problem.
And the narcissist does not understand thathe has no problem at all,

(28:41):
but that everyone around him is theone with the problem. But already coming
out of that personality disorder and enteringwhat would be a person you' re
just seeing, that' s aperson who has such an inflexible belief system
that doesn' t leave it.For example, socializing, you can do

(29:03):
something like one, a civilian,anyone as a friend, a friend,
you can do something for that person, because telling him sees therapy as not
a solution. No, people don' t usually get it from a better
handler. Then how can you nothelp a person you' re going through?
There I would also like to commenton this which you have just said

(29:29):
about whether there is cure or notcure for some disorders. I am not
so in favour of believing this becauseI think it is obviously very important to
understand that human beings change. Thenwe are constantly on the other hand.

(29:51):
When the person has the disposition,sometimes you can see that certain improvements and
that also helps quite a bit.And that' s where we start sensitizing
the population about what' s importantwhen going to therapy. I know people
can' t take it the bestway, but naturally speaking I think it

(30:11):
' s the right thing to do. And that' s where come a
little bit of the recommendations that Iusually give for when we see this kind
of behavior with people in the dayto day, not putting limits saying what
we don' t like, Isaid it right now, it' s

(30:32):
something that can work, it doesn' t seem, I don' t
know that you have a problem.Then you need to work it out.
I will not allow you to continue, for example, by attacking me unclear.
Or, for example, if wesee a person who has difficulty socializing,
as you mentioned, not saying itopenly. He doesn' t hear.
I think you' re missing outon a lot of life, what
it' s like to live.And I think it' s important that

(30:56):
you seek help because you really careabout me or even love you, or
even this one I wish you couldmake the most of life or things like
that. They are not speeches thatare precisely about therapy, but that make
clear in a very assertive way thatthe person is, there is something that

(31:19):
is wrong or that should, shouldnot be true, but that it would
be interesting to change and strengthen alittle with this. Why, then,
because I see it, it's not because I have to do it
or because I say it, it' s not because I care, because
I love you, because I wantyou to have a better quality of life.
Well, Alan, I don't know if you know, but

(31:41):
our podcast is the motto that you' re a very gay podcast, because
we' re trying to make contentfor the LGBTQ community and plus. Then
we always try to direct the issuesa little bit to help our community.
So, how specific belief systems influencethe lives of the people of the Community,

(32:02):
if you have had the joy,if you have had patients of the
Community, of course and joy andhow to call it, because I do

(32:23):
believe it is a great fortune forme, because in Mexico mental health itself
is difficult to act and is fora very privileged sector. Sure. So,

(32:45):
when I start working in the clinicalsetting, I start working with boys
and girls with childhoods in general,and I realize that there are no spaces
to talk about sexuality There are nospaces to talk about sexual orientation, There

(33:06):
are no spaces to talk about genderwith boys and girls and they need to
talk about it, they have doubtsabout that and they have clear interests eyes,
without falling as on our part,of simply sexualizing the fact that how
to dress, they already talk aboutmy sexuality. Then it is something that
children of children may need this guidance. And that' s where I start.

(33:31):
When I start working in master's degree, in clinical psychology,
I start working with git population becauseI think they were a population that required
personalized attention, it' s aspecialized care and that broke a little bit
with traditional psychotherapy schemes, which arecompletely heteronormated. Yes, then, how
do these belief systems influence, becausewe are a population in which we have

(33:57):
been violated in our rights some ofhistory and that I believe that every generation
has had its own problems, everygeneration has had its challenges. Of course,
we are not the generation of theeighty- s, we are not
the generation of the seventy, butthe generation of the two thousand, of
the two thousand and ten, ofthe two thousand and twenty is having their

(34:22):
own difficulties. Not sure, paradigmshave changed. So being LGBT plaus today
poses a challenge. Still a lotof people think not, but in reality
there are still ghosts of the pastand beliefs that have to be changed.

(34:44):
We speak with the present of greateracceptance, but in reality, it is
an acceptance that has been much disguised. It is an acceptance that is also
limited. There' s a conditionedspeech, that is, this follows but
don' t be enough, don' t be so feminine or lesbian,
but don' t be so masculinethis and who the bisexuals are. There

(35:07):
is no existence of some people,intersex people, who these intersex people are,
that is, how three sexes orfive sexes And biology if I know
that there are only all and lieslike these myths like these are the things
that make people the gbtplus, wesit down that we don' t have

(35:30):
a space and start to have psychologicalconsequences. Well, one of those consequences
I want to ask you if it' s Regina George' s famous complex
that' s mentioned a lot onTwitter and I don' t know if
on Instagram too it' s basicallythese gases that think or act like they

(35:51):
' re the best and that everythingthat' s underneath them, because there
' s something under them is theworst and they try to overshadow others.
Or or or or s to othersto feel like a better person. You
think that' s linked to thebelief systems of what you mention society has
made of them. That' sone is this a belief system that leads

(36:12):
you to act that way. Yeah, I was definitely saying that a little
while ago. We' re,we' re made of learning experiences.
So, how to survive in aworld that, to which you told thirteen
years old, I' m eithera lesbian and that I' m either

(36:36):
bisexual and that suddenly the world islike what' s going on. You
don' t start to look likecompensating for some things before you can create
barriers in other things, you startto develop personality in order to survive in
an environment that in society decided thatisn' t made for you yes,

(36:57):
that hasn' t been modified.And so that' s when they start
doing these kinds of behaviors that canbe a little inappropriate, that they may
have behind them something that in psychologywe call internalized homophobia or lgbte phobia or
le G negativity, as some callthem, but in the end they are

(37:17):
negative beliefs about it. Being partof a sexual diversity and just talking about
it, in your professional experience asa therapist, which situations are the most
common in the person in the community. There' s no specific study on

(37:38):
this and I mentioned it to youa little while ago. Every generation has
had as with its difficulties. Thereare studies, for example, between two
thousand ten and two thousand twenty wherethere was a lot of suicidal ideation,
a lot of depression, there isa lot of anxiety in the two thousand

(38:00):
in the nineties there are also manyliteratures about depression LGBT community anxiety. But
at present it has diversified quite broadly. What we do insist, we insist
all the people who work in clinicalpsychology to do Yes the audio went away.

(38:32):
They do tell me you don't hear us. I, yes,
listeners already perfect. Ah I wastelling you what we tried to make
clear is that being the GBT plusis not the problem. That' s
not the problem definitely, that is, the person doesn' t get therapy
because he' s lesbian, gay, with sexual and intersex, it'

(38:55):
s not the problem. The problemis a bit like the difficulties that this
person has faced as he leaves theprosth by having his first formal relationship,
which is another thing that also happens, which is also heard a lot in
therapy when looking for a job opportunity. We' re seeing it a little

(39:16):
bit with trans people who have insecurities, that there are certain fears, and
then it' s like empowering theperson so that he can become satisfied,
satisfied, satisfied with what he's doing. And an accompaniment was provided,

(39:36):
an accompaniment that can be in whichperson feels validated to which the person
feels listened and that can receive likethis psychological help, without the prejudice behind
it, then, in general,what I would tell you after difficulties for
the first relationship, to get outof the closet, to talk with family,

(39:59):
to start your life with your partner. And I like that. You
know because about five years ago,for example, I still received patients who
couldn' t show affection for theirpartner in public and no longer, I

(40:25):
haven' t touched myself. Sothat means something is making it very clear
that there has been some progress.So, starting from that that you'
re not saying now, I hadsome difference besides, for example, getting
out of the closet and teaching,like showing affection in public some difference between

(40:45):
your heterosexual patients and your patient whoare from the Community. I can'
t, I can' t,maybe someone else can tell you this one.
What I am trying to do inmy clinical practice is to treat all

(41:05):
people with dignity, with respect,valuing them, listening to them, and
perhaps I could point out not asthis discourse, which may be very conditioned,
where the person does not feel ableto be in his environment. But

(41:31):
for each person has as his orher specific problems. Then this is what
it is. What I do haveto stress is that there must be a
difference in clinicians to treat patients inthe GBT Community, or you can'
t treat clinicians ourselves as teraquestions.We can' t tie up all people

(41:52):
the same way. We cannot,for example, believe that we must integrate
Jano practices from our clinical practice.Asking for a pronoun is like you just
did at first, or just askingthe person what he likes to be called.
Sure, then, suddenly we're so mechanized, not that we
read. It comes to us likethe clinical report comes to us with this

(42:15):
first sheet of presentation and the personputs his name. It' s just
like that. But because the persondoes not even identify with that name,
because they are transition processes or becausehe is the man who was assigned to
the EC. So ask how youlike it, what they call this talk
to me about you, start tellingme, use a more neutral language,

(42:38):
use psychological tests that have a genderperspective. For example, there is an
inventory of anxiety that you ask andas, when you are in the presence
of the other genre, you feelanxious. And it' s like,
if you ask him, he's a person of gb to say no,

(43:00):
he' s not going to cheerme up. But, for example,
if you ask when there is asexual interest towards someone more neutral,
you feel anxious. That' swhy, yes, you won' t
find much more, much more tangibleresults. So I think the change,
most of all, should be inus as clinicians. I want to thank

(43:24):
you Alan for your presence, foreverything you' ve told us today and
for all the apps you' vebeen to us, Fernando. Yes,
actually this conversation has been very nutritiousand more because sometimes we, as you
said at the beginning, that is, our belief system, d leaks into

(43:44):
our life at all times and sometimesyou don' t see it or perceive
it. And it is very important, that it is very important that we
be aware, aware because it isnot even aware of that, but aware
that, just as we believe itis the world, so we will perceive
it exactly. Now I wanted toask you about your social networks and where

(44:09):
we can find you if if youwould like to share it with us as
well, I can share the profileof Terapify, which is the app for
which I work. In Terapify,you can find me with my full name.
Alan Alejandro Sandoval Mendoza I am aclinical therapist and there you can find

(44:34):
the profile of all my experience andmy profession and all that I have done
I am little of social networks,but as well and on Facebook I am
there as Alan Sandoval Mendoza also andyou can find me and because already I
think we would be you could pleasetalk to me a little bit about the

(44:57):
application TERAPFY. Claro thrapi Fay isan application where you can receive virtual consultation.
You enter, make a profile andaccording to your needs, because maybe
you are looking for a therapist whoadapts more to the problem you are living.
It is very important to read theexperience of trapepers. Then let us

(45:20):
comment on that degree error. It' s just that I' m going
with him because he helped my cousin, because he helped my friend. But
I really think it' s veryimportant that you, as a patient,
choose your therapist and I think it' s fal therapy It' s a
good tool for you to see profilesyou therapists that can adapt to what you
' re living and that the lightyou can also click on then, because

(45:40):
also on the same platform you canknow a little bit about our personality,
our tastes and our interests. ThenTerape fails. That' s what costs
and I' m very ignorant.I don' t really get into those
things much, but this one hasservice all over Latin America and I think

(46:01):
it' s also in the UnitedStates. If I' m not mistaken,
yes, yes, thank you verymuch. True, thank you so
much for sharing this, because sotoo many people know and may enter the
world of therapy. If you areembarrassed or unable to gain access, or
unable to do so in any otherway. Terapify a very good way.
Thank you so much, Alan Fernando, thanks to you. Thank you,

(46:22):
too. Fulso tell everyone who islistening to us not to be Egoists share
this episode, listen to bald tongues, that it is another podcast of the
family to hear this and have fun. Bye bye U a podcast we Gay
Brick. Who