April 10, 2025 • 28 mins
Your subconscious mind is secretly sabotaging your business success. That's the startling revelation powering this transformative episode where we dive deep into the invisible forces controlling your results.
"Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will rule your life, and you will call it fate." This powerful quote serves as the foundation for understanding why so many ambitious entrepreneurs struggle despite their best efforts. Your brain operates through deeply ingrained rules formed through emotional experiences and repetition—rules that dictate how you interpret every situation you encounter.
When you post content that receives minimal engagement, that's a neutral fact. But your subconscious mind transforms it into evidence supporting your limiting beliefs. If you believe "I'm not good enough," even four likes becomes confirmation of your unworthiness. This interpretation triggers emotions like frustration and disappointment, leading to either avoidance behaviors or desperate, misaligned actions that ultimately manifest the exact results your limiting belief predicted.
I share my personal journey of starting and quitting six businesses in my twenties, unaware that my subconscious programming from growing up in a strict religious environment was creating invisible barriers to success. Every time my business gained momentum, paralyzing thoughts would emerge—"What if this isn't the right path?"—making quitting feel like the only acceptable option.
The PUSH Method gives you a framework to break these cycles by identifying the stories your brain tells about neutral situations and consciously choosing interpretations that serve your goals. While mindset work won't magically create success, it opens the door to taking consistent, aligned actions necessary for achievement.
Ready to transform your results by reprogramming your subconscious for success? This episode gives you the psychological tools to identify and rewrite the invisible rules holding you back. Your success isn't about fate—it's about conscious choice.
If you would like to learn more about working with Josh, and the Performance Coaching Certification, visit JoshCoats.com!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi, my name is Josh and I'm your push coach.
I'm a failed rock star turnedseven-figure life coach.
I've trained over 40,000coaches and entrepreneurs since
I got started back in 2014.
I currently run my own lifecoach certification for those
who want to learn the powerfultools of transforming lives
using the psychology of truecoaching.
On this show, we're going toexplore business from a
(00:24):
different perspective.
I combine high energy withpsychology to teach you business
in a totally different way.
If you're tired of being told tojust show up and do the work,
or just believe more or justtrust the compound effect, this
podcast will take you on a deepdive to help you understand what
is actually holding you andyour clients back from doing the
(00:47):
work.
Once you understand thepsychology of performance, we
can build powerful messagingthat will attract the right
people who finally show up anddo the work.
If you're ready to be apowerful leader and build your
legacy, let's dive in.
Okay, so let's jump into thesubconscious mind first, because
(01:08):
I think this is reallyimportant.
I want everyone to write thisquote down, if you can until you
make the unconscious conscious,it will rule your life, and you
will call it fate.
Until you make the unconscious,conscious, it will rule your
(01:30):
life and you will call it fate.
What is the number one thingthat you feel like you are
currently struggling with whenit comes to your beliefs about
your ability to create success?
When I ask you, know to makethat six figures, or make that
(01:51):
seven figures or whatever, thatis what is the biggest belief
that's really holding you back.
I don't deserve it.
Last experiences in othercompanies and that I need some
skill that I don't havecompanies and that I need some
skill that I don't have.
I just don't believe in myself.
I don't think it's for meImposter syndrome, not good
(02:12):
enough.
My past rise and fallChanning's in a rebuild.
Rebuilds are tough and hard.
I highly recommend you grab myF leadership book if you don't
already have it.
Friend, okay, I'm not goodenough.
I'm struggling to make sales,so I feel like it's hard for me
to help my teammates.
There's something I'm missing,afraid of the success and not
being able to keep it up if I domake it, doing exactly what top
(02:34):
leaders are doing but notgetting the same results, okay.
So I just asked you a veryintentional question that forced
you to go inside.
That's what questions do andthat's why life coaching is all
about asking the right questions.
Okay, I could direct this wholeconversation with the type of
(02:56):
question that I ask.
Okay, and that's what Iliterally teach in the questions
that convert is how to usethose questions to get people
moving where you want them to go.
It's not true coaching, butit's using coaching elements to
make sales.
Okay, so by asking the rightquestion, I just forced all of
you out of your conscious stateand to go into the subconscious
(03:18):
and find the right answer.
Does that make sense Now, oncewe have pinpointed that answer?
Does that make sense Now, oncewe have pinpointed that this is
something that's reallyimportant?
Whatever that thing was thatyou just said is, unfortunately,
for right now.
It can be fixed.
It can be fixed, okay, but forright now, it is what I would
(03:39):
call a permanent rule that yourbrain is choosing to live by.
At some point in your life,something or some things
happened.
The way it gets into oursubconscious is either through
emotional experiences orrepetition.
Sometimes it's a combination,and I will say, being someone
(04:03):
who grew up in a cult, thecombination of repetition and
emotional experiences made itreally freaking hard.
I mean, like to this day, Istill have thoughts that make
absolutely no sense at all, andI'll stop myself and be like
(04:25):
what?
No, that is, that is a ah.
The cult is still calling to me.
It's just, it got ingrained sodeep and some of you are here
are religious.
Some of you here are notreligious.
It really doesn't matter to mewhether you are or aren't
religious, but I grew up in sucha strict, freaking world that
(04:48):
it literally was a brainwashing.
Okay, and and in some ways, allof our environments are doing
some type of brainwashing butthere's a really big difference
between you know, my parentsalways told me that we don't
have enough money, which, by theway, is also true for me.
That was a brainwashing thathappened.
There's a really big differencebetween that and when someone
(05:11):
attaches it to some, likeeternal fear and judgment and
shame about every singledecision and choice you make in
life.
Okay, like one time my dadcaught me at the mall, in the
parking lot.
Someone drove by and this wasthe nineties, so they were
bumping.
Some of you are too young toeven know what the hell that
(05:32):
means, but that's what we calledit when they had big subs and
they were bumping.
Okay, and I was 10, 10 yearsold, total innocence.
I just started dancing.
I was like, oh music.
I just started and my dadlooked at me like I had just
invited the devil to come intoour house and said we don't
dance to music like that.
And in that moment there wassomething that went into my
(05:55):
subconscious that created thisrule.
If you accidentally even justdance to the wrong kind of music
not listen to it every singleday just accidentally dance to
it, something terrible and awfulis going to happen.
Now, what's that terrible orawful thing that's going to
(06:15):
happen?
I mean, I don't know.
No one ever really said.
But that's the thing with thesubconscious is it's not
necessarily dictating throughany version of logic, it's only
dictating through the rules thathave been written.
Does that make sense?
That's what makes oursubconscious.
Mind is already so freakingpowerful and when we get it
(06:38):
trained the right way, damn, wecan be called invincible.
But when you get it trained thewrong way, you can be called
invincible, but when you get ittrained the wrong way, it can
literally rule your life and youstart to call it fate, because
it doesn't feel like you haveany control.
Anybody here ever feel like you,just like I don't even have
(07:00):
control over this.
It's just happening to me, andwe would often call that a
victim mentality, but thereality is, if you haven't
learned what I'm teaching youright now, how would you have
any other choice?
I don't think anybody in theworld is like woke up today and
was like I want to be a victimtoday.
No one does that consciously.
(07:22):
It's that when we have all thesubconscious stuff working
against us, we don't know how tobe in control.
Even when we try to takecontrol, this thing is still
dictating.
Does that make sense toeveryone?
And so I'm just going to giveyou an example.
I'm not good enough, okay.
And I'm borrowing this onebecause this, in my opinion, is
(07:44):
the root of all the other thingsthat everybody else is saying
In some way, somehow I'm notgood enough, yeah.
So let's think about this for asecond.
You go to make a post.
You just got to post, you justgot to do it.
It's got to like count to fiveand just do it, just do it.
Scared Go for no, just do it,do it, do it.
(08:05):
So finally you're like okay,fine, I'll do it, and you go to
make a post, but remember, inyour subconscious, you're
already convinced that you'renot good enough.
So you make the post and thepost gets four likes and one
angry face.
It's always that asshole on theinternet, right.
(08:32):
Like what?
Why'd you put an angry face onmy motivational quote?
That doesn't even make senseright Now.
If you had a subconscious mindthat was programmed for
abundance instead of I'm notgood enough, you might have
looked at that and said fourlikes and one angry face.
This is very important, friends.
(08:54):
Friends, four likes and oneangry face is a totally and
completely neutral event Untilyour brain interprets it through
the rules you have written.
Does that make sense?
Because there might be somebodyelse out there that didn't get
a single like on their posts andto that person they'd be like
(09:23):
dang Kelly, you got fiveinteractions, that's five more
than I got To that person.
That could be a lot right, butto you, because you're already
convinced you're not good enough, you didn't look at the people
that got less engagement thanyou.
You looked at all the peoplethat got more engagement than
you.
And because that is the rulethat's in your head we have, I'm
(09:44):
going to teach you guys what Icall the push method.
The push method is what wetrain our life coaches to use
with their clients.
Okay, but inside my membershipthat I run, I use the push
method to help others to workthrough.
Run, I use the push method tohelp others to work through.
So we have a fact.
This is where everything starts, because everything in life is
(10:04):
just a neutral fact until ourbrain gets a hold of it.
Okay, the fact is, made a postand got four likes and one angry
face.
That is literally the mostneutral fact.
No added words, no addedfeelings.
Okay.
So if someone says I only gotfour likes, that's not a fact
(10:28):
because you added your ownfeeling to it, which was only
Okay Only can't be a fact.
That's you adding things to theevent to give your own
perspective.
So from here the story is I'mnot enough.
I would be willing to bet awhole lot of money that there's
a coinciding story more specificto this event that's saying
(10:51):
that was such a waste of time.
That was the story.
From the story, in other words,what our brain interprets this
event to mean.
Our brain is connected tothousands it's actually probably
millions of emotional receptors.
So imagine millions of wiresrunning from your brain to your
(11:14):
body, okay, and there is aliteral chemical reaction that
happens.
We call it feelings.
The reality is it's just achemical reaction to how our
brain interpreted a situation.
Everybody still with me.
I'm trying to make this aselementary as possible, which
usually happens naturally,because I'm not smart enough to
make it any more complicatedthan that.
(11:35):
Okay, so it's like I'm drawinga children's book for you all
these wires, and if the story isthat was such a waste of time,
it naturally creates thesefeelings.
So you make a post, you getfour likes and one angry face
and, as a result, you think toyourself what a waste of time.
And because of that, you feeldefeated and frustrated and
(11:58):
disappointed.
This is why, friends, this issuch an important lesson Because
, with all the personal growthwe have done, most of us have
come to this understanding noone has said this out loud, but
most of us have come to thisunderstanding that personal
growth is about avoiding all ofthe negative feelings and just
pretending that everything isokay and going about our
(12:21):
business.
That is not growth, it is notpersonal growth and it is not
self-awareness, it is avoidance.
Okay, I'm not saying we shouldsit around for 12 hours every
single day working through ourfeelings, but we need to do it a
few times a week for a coupleminutes, or we're going to be in
constant reaction mode.
Okay, you will not createsuccess in reaction mode and if
(12:44):
you do, you will kill yourselfin the process.
It's why we see some topleaders going on nine-year yoga
retreats to recover from all thestupid issues they did for five
or six years to build theirbusiness, and I don't want any
of you to need a nine year yogaretreat.
I want you to create alignedsuccess.
Does that make sense?
So when we take no actions oravoid taking the actions we
(13:10):
should take, we teach in mycertification that there's
there's technically a couple ofthings we do.
We either take what I callbuffer actions, which means we
find something else to do tofill the time, so that we don't
have to face what it is we'redealing with.
Yeah, for me, I am more of acreative type.
I will go make so many fuckinggraphics in Canva.
(13:34):
I mean, canva will just becomeby like new templates.
Let's see, I don't know, couldwe try some new colors?
Maybe that's why, duh Josh,your reel didn't go viral
because you didn't use the rightcolors.
Let's go design some morecolors, right?
So that's one thing.
A lot of you this is not me,okay A lot of you are
psychopaths.
(13:54):
I still love you, but when youbuffer, you avoid your business
by cleaning your house.
That is actually the mostcommon answer we get from people
is that when they, like, feeluneasy and uncertain about their
business, they go do the dishes, they go fold some laundry
(14:15):
because your brain wants to feelgood and wants to feel like you
have accomplished something.
But this is just human nature.
Okay, I like to joke thatyou're psychopaths.
I'm probably the psychopathbecause I should be doing the
dishes more often.
My wife would really appreciateit if that was my buffer
activity, but it's not.
(14:36):
It's Canva, unfortunately.
Okay Now, so we either dobuffer actions Okay, or this
one's really important If you'rea big time fighter remember the
fighter flight Okay, if you'rea big time fighter, you end up
doing what I call unalignedaction, which is just as
dangerous.
It's the idea that, well, Ididn't get what I wanted, so I'm
(14:59):
just going to force it.
I'm going to you know what?
If that person said no, I'mgoing to send 40 more messages
just to prove that I'm not aquitter.
And it's not that there'sanything wrong with the action
per se.
It's more of the energy andheart and perspective that you
did it from.
Does that make sense?
Because when we are operatingout of our fight or flight, it
(15:24):
might feel like we're beingproductive, but often we're just
punching people in the face andthat's never really been very
productive.
We don't always need to go towar with every single situation
in our life, but if we do, weare really, really really
destroying our mental, ourphysical, our emotional and our
(15:46):
spiritual health.
Okay, especially if you'restarting to get up in years,
like I am.
I turned 41 in December and Ican tell you the difference
between my energy levels at 41and 31.
I mean, I take really good careof myself and I am in really
good shape.
I go to the gym six days a week, but it is just not like I was
(16:08):
when I was 31,.
Guys, when I was 31, I couldhave taken 10 coaching calls a
day and then been like good togo.
At 41, I do most of my meetupcalls audio, only just to save
my eyeballs, because I'm justlike I've been staring at
screens all day for 10 years.
My eyes need a break, my brainneeds a break, so it's just
(16:29):
different and this is, I thinkwhat we see happen a lot is
people hustle their ass off forfive or six years, get burned
out, and then we also see a lotof like leaders not showing up
the way they used to show up andfor some of them it's because
they haven't learned how tocoach themselves into aligned
action where we can still do theright thing.
(16:50):
But it doesn't need to be out offrustration and out of anger
and trying to prove somethingthat makes sense to everyone.
So, whether we are takingunaligned action or buffer
actions, we do end upmanifesting something, okay.
So manifest is a reallyoverused word in the woo-woo
(17:11):
world and I got nothing againstthe woo-woo world, but manifest
is really just what tangibleresult you actually end up
creating in the world.
Okay, the reason like I don'thave a problem with the woo-woo
world, but the reason some ofthe manifestation stuff rubs me
the wrong way is because theyskip all of the lines in the
(17:32):
push method except for feelingsand manifest, that's all they
care about.
If it feels good, it'llmanifest.
Good, that's special Okay.
Slings and manifest, that's allthey care about.
If it feels good, it'llmanifest.
Good, that's special, okay.
I have never once put on musclelaying on the couch imagining
it.
Now, sometimes I lay on thecouch imagining it to inspire
myself to go to the gym.
But the reason I manifest mymuscles growing is because of
(18:01):
taking the action of going tothe gym and then hitting all my
protein goals.
Okay, it wasn't just because Ifelt it and imagined it and
visualized it.
The whole point of all of thatis to get you into action, not
to just magically createsomething.
Does that make sense foreverybody?
But let's take a look at this.
(18:24):
Amber makes a post, she getsfour likes and one angry face.
She then interprets it throughher own brain.
What a waste of time.
And so she feels frustrated.
And because she feelsfrustrated, she either goes and
(18:44):
does the dishes, if she's likeLauren, or goes and plays on
Canva, if she's more like Josh.
And because she goes and playson Canva, if she's more like
Josh, and because she goes andplays on Canva or does her
dishes and doesn't actuallylearn from the experience,
doesn't lean in to find out whatcould I have learned from this?
Instead, she ends upmanifesting Check this out,
(19:08):
you're gonna see something crazy.
This is a crazy magic trick.
It works 99 times out of 100.
What was the story, I am wastingmy time.
Can we all agree that, for thesake of her business, if she's
doing the dishes or playing onCanva, she's literally wasting
(19:29):
her time?
Does that make sense?
And then six months goes by andAmber is like I think I'm going
to quit this business becausethis whole business is a waste
of my time, and she feelscompletely powerless because it
seems like no matter what shedoes, she keeps getting the same
(19:54):
result.
The reality is, amber had theability to take control at any
time, but she was stuck in asubconscious cycle that kept her
pre-programming in controlinstead of having any conscious
awareness of what is actuallyhappening.
(20:16):
To change what is beingmanifested.
This is important.
The only way to change what youare manifesting is to go back
to the story and pick one thatserves what you actually want.
Now I just want to be veryclear about something Fixing
(20:40):
your mindset does not guaranteethat you will have success, but
it opens the door for theopportunities to do the things
it takes to get success.
Notice how, when we were stuckin this subconscious cycle,
amber didn't do anything tolearn how to get more engagement
(21:01):
.
She didn't do anything toanalyze the work that she had
done and figure out how to makeit better.
So I'm not saying that youdon't need social media strategy
, because I do think you do.
You absolutely do and that'swhy I teach it.
But if we're in the wrongheadspace, no amount of social
media training in the world willever matter.
She can pay the best coach inthe world at helping people go
(21:26):
viral.
But anyone who teaches how togo viral also talks a lot about
consistency and learning fromthe data and tweaking things and
making changes.
And how many of you can now seeif she has it stuck in her head
that she's not good enough andthis is a waste of time.
She will never be able to stickwith any process long enough to
(21:46):
find out if.
Even so, until we make theunconscious conscious, it
literally rules our life, but weaccidentally call it fate.
So in my 20s, I started and quitsix different businesses and I
got to the point where I waslike God hates my guts because I
(22:09):
have this strong desire to helppeople and make a better life
for my family.
But every single time I get anidea that is literally just like
charging me.
I am so excited about this idea.
It's so awesome.
It's so amazing.
I go to start and see initialsuccess and then, three or four
(22:30):
weeks in, it feels like I runinto a brick wall and I just
become totally paralyzed and Idon't know what to do and the
only thing I know to do to getrid of these overwhelming
feelings is to just quit,because every time I quit the
feelings are gone.
Oh, what a relief.
I just quit.
Now I'm good, except I'm notgood.
(22:50):
So I'm still stuck with thesame stupid issue I was trying
to fix.
I just got.
Now I'm good, except I'm notgood.
So I'm still stuck with thesame stupid issue I was trying
to fix.
I just got rid of the pressure.
So here's what I started torealize Once I got certified and
started learning about all thissubconscious stuff.
You know what I realized.
I was told this analogy as achild growing up in the cult.
We had a lot of really goodstories and analogies to make it
(23:12):
really great, and I was toldthis from the age of four that
if two planes leave LA headed toNew York at the same time and
one of them sticks to the pathand one of them gets one degree
off the path by the time the onelands in New York, the other
(23:34):
one will land somewhere in themiddle of the ocean.
Because even if you miss God'splan by just one degree over
time, that can take youcompletely off track and totally
derail you.
As a four-year-old I wasessentially brainwashed into
thinking that there was anabsolute perfect will of God for
(23:54):
every single thing in my lifeand if I missed it by 1% I was
going to drown in an ocean.
Just for funsies.
To make it extra triggering, Iliterally almost drowned when I
was five.
So that makes it even scarieron like a subconscious, even
deeper, like meta level.
It's like three layers down I'mafraid of drowning.
(24:16):
And that happened to be theanalogy that was used over and
over and over.
So here's what I realized in mytwenties every time I started up
that business and got going,that thought that I kept running
into that felt like a brickwall.
Here's what's crazy we ashumans are a hundred times more
aware of our emotions Than weare of the thought in our brain
(24:38):
that created the emotion.
Does that make sense?
So normally the average personisn't like oh, I made this post
the other day and you know whathappened.
I had this thought I'm notworthy.
No, that's not what we do.
We usually say I made this postthe other day and it sucked and
I feel terrible and awful andwhat a.
(25:00):
We are almost never consciouslyaware of the thing that
triggered off the feeling.
Does that make sense, everybody?
And so, through doing a lot oflife coaching during my
certification and diggingthrough a lot of stuff, I
started to realize the thoughtthat I kept unconsciously.
I would not have told anyonethis because I wasn't conscious
(25:22):
enough to realize it until Istarted thinking back and
dissecting it all.
Every single time I had thisthought over and over and over
what if this isn't the rightthing and it's taking me away
from God's plan?
That was the thought I had overand over and over, and, because
(25:44):
it was so deep rooted into mysubconscious, it sabotaged
everything.
It sabotaged everything becausemy brain had made a rule that
basically said if you are inGod's perfect plan, you are good
.
If you are even 1% off, you arebad.
(26:06):
And Josh did not want to be bad.
So I essentially had thischoice that was, either go ahead
and move forward and possiblybe bad, or quit.
And maybe you're not movingforward in life, but at least
you're good, and this is reallyimportant.
(26:29):
99 out of 100 of us will never,ever, ever, ever take an action
that makes us feel out ofalignment with our character.
And because that was mygreatest character trait that I
was taught growing up, ifsomething pulled me away from
that, I had to quit it rightaway.
For some of you, you're scaredto death of rejection, and
(26:55):
because of the fear of rejection, you're scared to death of
coming across as salesy orspammy.
Nobody wants to be a spammy,tammy right.
And because that fear of comingacross as being spammy, you
never message anybody becauseyou're so afraid it might
accidentally offend someone ormake someone think something
(27:17):
about you.
And so, because of that, you'regiven this choice Am I willing
to go against my own characterof being spammy to someone, or
am I just going to accept thefact that I'm not going to make
any sales this month and 99 outof 100 people will choose to
accept the fact that they're notgoing to make any sales because
(27:37):
that's better than being out ofintegrity.
Does that make sense?
And that is why all of my adsfor the questions that convert
say something like without beingspammy, without like, I
literally take the limitingbelief.
I find out what your limitingbeliefs are about the things I'm
going to teach, and then I usetitles and subtitles to overcome
(28:00):
the limiting belief you haveabout the thing I'm going to
teach so that you're more opento learning it.
When you understand thesubconscious mind, friends, it
becomes a hundred times easierto fix your mindset.
It also makes you a genius atsales and marketing when you
start applying it to themessaging and the way you
interact with others.
Hi, my name is Josh and I'm your push coach.
I'm a failed rock star turnedseven-figure life coach.
I've trained over 40,000coaches and entrepreneurs since
I got started back in 2014.
I currently run my own lifecoach certification for those
who want to learn the powerfultools of transforming lives
using the psychology of truecoaching.
On this show, we're going toexplore business from a
(00:24):
different perspective.
I combine high energy withpsychology to teach you business
in a totally different way.
If you're tired of being told tojust show up and do the work,
or just believe more or justtrust the compound effect, this
podcast will take you on a deepdive to help you understand what
is actually holding you andyour clients back from doing the
(00:47):
work.
Once you understand thepsychology of performance, we
can build powerful messagingthat will attract the right
people who finally show up anddo the work.
If you're ready to be apowerful leader and build your
legacy, let's dive in.
Okay, so let's jump into thesubconscious mind first, because
(01:08):
I think this is reallyimportant.
I want everyone to write thisquote down, if you can until you
make the unconscious conscious,it will rule your life, and you
will call it fate.
Until you make the unconscious,conscious, it will rule your
(01:30):
life and you will call it fate.
What is the number one thingthat you feel like you are
currently struggling with whenit comes to your beliefs about
your ability to create success?
When I ask you, know to makethat six figures, or make that
(01:51):
seven figures or whatever, thatis what is the biggest belief
that's really holding you back.
I don't deserve it.
Last experiences in othercompanies and that I need some
skill that I don't havecompanies and that I need some
skill that I don't have.
I just don't believe in myself.
I don't think it's for meImposter syndrome, not good
(02:12):
enough.
My past rise and fallChanning's in a rebuild.
Rebuilds are tough and hard.
I highly recommend you grab myF leadership book if you don't
already have it.
Friend, okay, I'm not goodenough.
I'm struggling to make sales,so I feel like it's hard for me
to help my teammates.
There's something I'm missing,afraid of the success and not
being able to keep it up if I domake it, doing exactly what top
(02:34):
leaders are doing but notgetting the same results, okay.
So I just asked you a veryintentional question that forced
you to go inside.
That's what questions do andthat's why life coaching is all
about asking the right questions.
Okay, I could direct this wholeconversation with the type of
(02:56):
question that I ask.
Okay, and that's what Iliterally teach in the questions
that convert is how to usethose questions to get people
moving where you want them to go.
It's not true coaching, butit's using coaching elements to
make sales.
Okay, so by asking the rightquestion, I just forced all of
you out of your conscious stateand to go into the subconscious
(03:18):
and find the right answer.
Does that make sense Now, oncewe have pinpointed that answer?
Does that make sense Now, oncewe have pinpointed that this is
something that's reallyimportant?
Whatever that thing was thatyou just said is, unfortunately,
for right now.
It can be fixed.
It can be fixed, okay, but forright now, it is what I would
(03:39):
call a permanent rule that yourbrain is choosing to live by.
At some point in your life,something or some things
happened.
The way it gets into oursubconscious is either through
emotional experiences orrepetition.
Sometimes it's a combination,and I will say, being someone
(04:03):
who grew up in a cult, thecombination of repetition and
emotional experiences made itreally freaking hard.
I mean, like to this day, Istill have thoughts that make
absolutely no sense at all, andI'll stop myself and be like
(04:25):
what?
No, that is, that is a ah.
The cult is still calling to me.
It's just, it got ingrained sodeep and some of you are here
are religious.
Some of you here are notreligious.
It really doesn't matter to mewhether you are or aren't
religious, but I grew up in sucha strict, freaking world that
(04:48):
it literally was a brainwashing.
Okay, and and in some ways, allof our environments are doing
some type of brainwashing butthere's a really big difference
between you know, my parentsalways told me that we don't
have enough money, which, by theway, is also true for me.
That was a brainwashing thathappened.
There's a really big differencebetween that and when someone
(05:11):
attaches it to some, likeeternal fear and judgment and
shame about every singledecision and choice you make in
life.
Okay, like one time my dadcaught me at the mall, in the
parking lot.
Someone drove by and this wasthe nineties, so they were
bumping.
Some of you are too young toeven know what the hell that
(05:32):
means, but that's what we calledit when they had big subs and
they were bumping.
Okay, and I was 10, 10 yearsold, total innocence.
I just started dancing.
I was like, oh music.
I just started and my dadlooked at me like I had just
invited the devil to come intoour house and said we don't
dance to music like that.
And in that moment there wassomething that went into my
(05:55):
subconscious that created thisrule.
If you accidentally even justdance to the wrong kind of music
not listen to it every singleday just accidentally dance to
it, something terrible and awfulis going to happen.
Now, what's that terrible orawful thing that's going to
(06:15):
happen?
I mean, I don't know.
No one ever really said.
But that's the thing with thesubconscious is it's not
necessarily dictating throughany version of logic, it's only
dictating through the rules thathave been written.
Does that make sense?
That's what makes oursubconscious.
Mind is already so freakingpowerful and when we get it
(06:38):
trained the right way, damn, wecan be called invincible.
But when you get it trained thewrong way, you can be called
invincible, but when you get ittrained the wrong way, it can
literally rule your life and youstart to call it fate, because
it doesn't feel like you haveany control.
Anybody here ever feel like you,just like I don't even have
(07:00):
control over this.
It's just happening to me, andwe would often call that a
victim mentality, but thereality is, if you haven't
learned what I'm teaching youright now, how would you have
any other choice?
I don't think anybody in theworld is like woke up today and
was like I want to be a victimtoday.
No one does that consciously.
(07:22):
It's that when we have all thesubconscious stuff working
against us, we don't know how tobe in control.
Even when we try to takecontrol, this thing is still
dictating.
Does that make sense toeveryone?
And so I'm just going to giveyou an example.
I'm not good enough, okay.
And I'm borrowing this onebecause this, in my opinion, is
(07:44):
the root of all the other thingsthat everybody else is saying
In some way, somehow I'm notgood enough, yeah.
So let's think about this for asecond.
You go to make a post.
You just got to post, you justgot to do it.
It's got to like count to fiveand just do it, just do it.
Scared Go for no, just do it,do it, do it.
(08:05):
So finally you're like okay,fine, I'll do it, and you go to
make a post, but remember, inyour subconscious, you're
already convinced that you'renot good enough.
So you make the post and thepost gets four likes and one
angry face.
It's always that asshole on theinternet, right.
(08:32):
Like what?
Why'd you put an angry face onmy motivational quote?
That doesn't even make senseright Now.
If you had a subconscious mindthat was programmed for
abundance instead of I'm notgood enough, you might have
looked at that and said fourlikes and one angry face.
This is very important, friends.
(08:54):
Friends, four likes and oneangry face is a totally and
completely neutral event Untilyour brain interprets it through
the rules you have written.
Does that make sense?
Because there might be somebodyelse out there that didn't get
a single like on their posts andto that person they'd be like
(09:23):
dang Kelly, you got fiveinteractions, that's five more
than I got To that person.
That could be a lot right, butto you, because you're already
convinced you're not good enough, you didn't look at the people
that got less engagement thanyou.
You looked at all the peoplethat got more engagement than
you.
And because that is the rulethat's in your head we have, I'm
(09:44):
going to teach you guys what Icall the push method.
The push method is what wetrain our life coaches to use
with their clients.
Okay, but inside my membershipthat I run, I use the push
method to help others to workthrough.
Run, I use the push method tohelp others to work through.
So we have a fact.
This is where everything starts, because everything in life is
(10:04):
just a neutral fact until ourbrain gets a hold of it.
Okay, the fact is, made a postand got four likes and one angry
face.
That is literally the mostneutral fact.
No added words, no addedfeelings.
Okay.
So if someone says I only gotfour likes, that's not a fact
(10:28):
because you added your ownfeeling to it, which was only
Okay Only can't be a fact.
That's you adding things to theevent to give your own
perspective.
So from here the story is I'mnot enough.
I would be willing to bet awhole lot of money that there's
a coinciding story more specificto this event that's saying
(10:51):
that was such a waste of time.
That was the story.
From the story, in other words,what our brain interprets this
event to mean.
Our brain is connected tothousands it's actually probably
millions of emotional receptors.
So imagine millions of wiresrunning from your brain to your
(11:14):
body, okay, and there is aliteral chemical reaction that
happens.
We call it feelings.
The reality is it's just achemical reaction to how our
brain interpreted a situation.
Everybody still with me.
I'm trying to make this aselementary as possible, which
usually happens naturally,because I'm not smart enough to
make it any more complicatedthan that.
(11:35):
Okay, so it's like I'm drawinga children's book for you all
these wires, and if the story isthat was such a waste of time,
it naturally creates thesefeelings.
So you make a post, you getfour likes and one angry face
and, as a result, you think toyourself what a waste of time.
And because of that, you feeldefeated and frustrated and
(11:58):
disappointed.
This is why, friends, this issuch an important lesson Because
, with all the personal growthwe have done, most of us have
come to this understanding noone has said this out loud, but
most of us have come to thisunderstanding that personal
growth is about avoiding all ofthe negative feelings and just
pretending that everything isokay and going about our
(12:21):
business.
That is not growth, it is notpersonal growth and it is not
self-awareness, it is avoidance.
Okay, I'm not saying we shouldsit around for 12 hours every
single day working through ourfeelings, but we need to do it a
few times a week for a coupleminutes, or we're going to be in
constant reaction mode.
Okay, you will not createsuccess in reaction mode and if
(12:44):
you do, you will kill yourselfin the process.
It's why we see some topleaders going on nine-year yoga
retreats to recover from all thestupid issues they did for five
or six years to build theirbusiness, and I don't want any
of you to need a nine year yogaretreat.
I want you to create alignedsuccess.
Does that make sense?
So when we take no actions oravoid taking the actions we
(13:10):
should take, we teach in mycertification that there's
there's technically a couple ofthings we do.
We either take what I callbuffer actions, which means we
find something else to do tofill the time, so that we don't
have to face what it is we'redealing with.
Yeah, for me, I am more of acreative type.
I will go make so many fuckinggraphics in Canva.
(13:34):
I mean, canva will just becomeby like new templates.
Let's see, I don't know, couldwe try some new colors?
Maybe that's why, duh Josh,your reel didn't go viral
because you didn't use the rightcolors.
Let's go design some morecolors, right?
So that's one thing.
A lot of you this is not me,okay A lot of you are
psychopaths.
(13:54):
I still love you, but when youbuffer, you avoid your business
by cleaning your house.
That is actually the mostcommon answer we get from people
is that when they, like, feeluneasy and uncertain about their
business, they go do the dishes, they go fold some laundry
(14:15):
because your brain wants to feelgood and wants to feel like you
have accomplished something.
But this is just human nature.
Okay, I like to joke thatyou're psychopaths.
I'm probably the psychopathbecause I should be doing the
dishes more often.
My wife would really appreciateit if that was my buffer
activity, but it's not.
(14:36):
It's Canva, unfortunately.
Okay Now, so we either dobuffer actions Okay, or this
one's really important If you'rea big time fighter remember the
fighter flight Okay, if you'rea big time fighter, you end up
doing what I call unalignedaction, which is just as
dangerous.
It's the idea that, well, Ididn't get what I wanted, so I'm
(14:59):
just going to force it.
I'm going to you know what?
If that person said no, I'mgoing to send 40 more messages
just to prove that I'm not aquitter.
And it's not that there'sanything wrong with the action
per se.
It's more of the energy andheart and perspective that you
did it from.
Does that make sense?
Because when we are operatingout of our fight or flight, it
(15:24):
might feel like we're beingproductive, but often we're just
punching people in the face andthat's never really been very
productive.
We don't always need to go towar with every single situation
in our life, but if we do, weare really, really really
destroying our mental, ourphysical, our emotional and our
(15:46):
spiritual health.
Okay, especially if you'restarting to get up in years,
like I am.
I turned 41 in December and Ican tell you the difference
between my energy levels at 41and 31.
I mean, I take really good careof myself and I am in really
good shape.
I go to the gym six days a week, but it is just not like I was
(16:08):
when I was 31,.
Guys, when I was 31, I couldhave taken 10 coaching calls a
day and then been like good togo.
At 41, I do most of my meetupcalls audio, only just to save
my eyeballs, because I'm justlike I've been staring at
screens all day for 10 years.
My eyes need a break, my brainneeds a break, so it's just
(16:29):
different and this is, I thinkwhat we see happen a lot is
people hustle their ass off forfive or six years, get burned
out, and then we also see a lotof like leaders not showing up
the way they used to show up andfor some of them it's because
they haven't learned how tocoach themselves into aligned
action where we can still do theright thing.
(16:50):
But it doesn't need to be out offrustration and out of anger
and trying to prove somethingthat makes sense to everyone.
So, whether we are takingunaligned action or buffer
actions, we do end upmanifesting something, okay.
So manifest is a reallyoverused word in the woo-woo
(17:11):
world and I got nothing againstthe woo-woo world, but manifest
is really just what tangibleresult you actually end up
creating in the world.
Okay, the reason like I don'thave a problem with the woo-woo
world, but the reason some ofthe manifestation stuff rubs me
the wrong way is because theyskip all of the lines in the
(17:32):
push method except for feelingsand manifest, that's all they
care about.
If it feels good, it'llmanifest.
Good, that's special Okay.
Slings and manifest, that's allthey care about.
If it feels good, it'llmanifest.
Good, that's special, okay.
I have never once put on musclelaying on the couch imagining
it.
Now, sometimes I lay on thecouch imagining it to inspire
myself to go to the gym.
But the reason I manifest mymuscles growing is because of
(18:01):
taking the action of going tothe gym and then hitting all my
protein goals.
Okay, it wasn't just because Ifelt it and imagined it and
visualized it.
The whole point of all of thatis to get you into action, not
to just magically createsomething.
Does that make sense foreverybody?
But let's take a look at this.
(18:24):
Amber makes a post, she getsfour likes and one angry face.
She then interprets it throughher own brain.
What a waste of time.
And so she feels frustrated.
And because she feelsfrustrated, she either goes and
(18:44):
does the dishes, if she's likeLauren, or goes and plays on
Canva, if she's more like Josh.
And because she goes and playson Canva, if she's more like
Josh, and because she goes andplays on Canva or does her
dishes and doesn't actuallylearn from the experience,
doesn't lean in to find out whatcould I have learned from this?
Instead, she ends upmanifesting Check this out,
(19:08):
you're gonna see something crazy.
This is a crazy magic trick.
It works 99 times out of 100.
What was the story, I am wastingmy time.
Can we all agree that, for thesake of her business, if she's
doing the dishes or playing onCanva, she's literally wasting
(19:29):
her time?
Does that make sense?
And then six months goes by andAmber is like I think I'm going
to quit this business becausethis whole business is a waste
of my time, and she feelscompletely powerless because it
seems like no matter what shedoes, she keeps getting the same
(19:54):
result.
The reality is, amber had theability to take control at any
time, but she was stuck in asubconscious cycle that kept her
pre-programming in controlinstead of having any conscious
awareness of what is actuallyhappening.
(20:16):
To change what is beingmanifested.
This is important.
The only way to change what youare manifesting is to go back
to the story and pick one thatserves what you actually want.
Now I just want to be veryclear about something Fixing
(20:40):
your mindset does not guaranteethat you will have success, but
it opens the door for theopportunities to do the things
it takes to get success.
Notice how, when we were stuckin this subconscious cycle,
amber didn't do anything tolearn how to get more engagement
(21:01):
.
She didn't do anything toanalyze the work that she had
done and figure out how to makeit better.
So I'm not saying that youdon't need social media strategy
, because I do think you do.
You absolutely do and that'swhy I teach it.
But if we're in the wrongheadspace, no amount of social
media training in the world willever matter.
She can pay the best coach inthe world at helping people go
(21:26):
viral.
But anyone who teaches how togo viral also talks a lot about
consistency and learning fromthe data and tweaking things and
making changes.
And how many of you can now seeif she has it stuck in her head
that she's not good enough andthis is a waste of time.
She will never be able to stickwith any process long enough to
(21:46):
find out if.
Even so, until we make theunconscious conscious, it
literally rules our life, but weaccidentally call it fate.
So in my 20s, I started and quitsix different businesses and I
got to the point where I waslike God hates my guts because I
(22:09):
have this strong desire to helppeople and make a better life
for my family.
But every single time I get anidea that is literally just like
charging me.
I am so excited about this idea.
It's so awesome.
It's so amazing.
I go to start and see initialsuccess and then, three or four
(22:30):
weeks in, it feels like I runinto a brick wall and I just
become totally paralyzed and Idon't know what to do and the
only thing I know to do to getrid of these overwhelming
feelings is to just quit,because every time I quit the
feelings are gone.
Oh, what a relief.
I just quit.
Now I'm good, except I'm notgood.
(22:50):
So I'm still stuck with thesame stupid issue I was trying
to fix.
I just got.
Now I'm good, except I'm notgood.
So I'm still stuck with thesame stupid issue I was trying
to fix.
I just got rid of the pressure.
So here's what I started torealize Once I got certified and
started learning about all thissubconscious stuff.
You know what I realized.
I was told this analogy as achild growing up in the cult.
We had a lot of really goodstories and analogies to make it
(23:12):
really great, and I was toldthis from the age of four that
if two planes leave LA headed toNew York at the same time and
one of them sticks to the pathand one of them gets one degree
off the path by the time the onelands in New York, the other
(23:34):
one will land somewhere in themiddle of the ocean.
Because even if you miss God'splan by just one degree over
time, that can take youcompletely off track and totally
derail you.
As a four-year-old I wasessentially brainwashed into
thinking that there was anabsolute perfect will of God for
(23:54):
every single thing in my lifeand if I missed it by 1% I was
going to drown in an ocean.
Just for funsies.
To make it extra triggering, Iliterally almost drowned when I
was five.
So that makes it even scarieron like a subconscious, even
deeper, like meta level.
It's like three layers down I'mafraid of drowning.
(24:16):
And that happened to be theanalogy that was used over and
over and over.
So here's what I realized in mytwenties every time I started up
that business and got going,that thought that I kept running
into that felt like a brickwall.
Here's what's crazy we ashumans are a hundred times more
aware of our emotions Than weare of the thought in our brain
(24:38):
that created the emotion.
Does that make sense?
So normally the average personisn't like oh, I made this post
the other day and you know whathappened.
I had this thought I'm notworthy.
No, that's not what we do.
We usually say I made this postthe other day and it sucked and
I feel terrible and awful andwhat a.
(25:00):
We are almost never consciouslyaware of the thing that
triggered off the feeling.
Does that make sense, everybody?
And so, through doing a lot oflife coaching during my
certification and diggingthrough a lot of stuff, I
started to realize the thoughtthat I kept unconsciously.
I would not have told anyonethis because I wasn't conscious
(25:22):
enough to realize it until Istarted thinking back and
dissecting it all.
Every single time I had thisthought over and over and over
what if this isn't the rightthing and it's taking me away
from God's plan?
That was the thought I had overand over and over, and, because
(25:44):
it was so deep rooted into mysubconscious, it sabotaged
everything.
It sabotaged everything becausemy brain had made a rule that
basically said if you are inGod's perfect plan, you are good
.
If you are even 1% off, you arebad.
(26:06):
And Josh did not want to be bad.
So I essentially had thischoice that was, either go ahead
and move forward and possiblybe bad, or quit.
And maybe you're not movingforward in life, but at least
you're good, and this is reallyimportant.
(26:29):
99 out of 100 of us will never,ever, ever, ever take an action
that makes us feel out ofalignment with our character.
And because that was mygreatest character trait that I
was taught growing up, ifsomething pulled me away from
that, I had to quit it rightaway.
For some of you, you're scaredto death of rejection, and
(26:55):
because of the fear of rejection, you're scared to death of
coming across as salesy orspammy.
Nobody wants to be a spammy,tammy right.
And because that fear of comingacross as being spammy, you
never message anybody becauseyou're so afraid it might
accidentally offend someone ormake someone think something
(27:17):
about you.
And so, because of that, you'regiven this choice Am I willing
to go against my own characterof being spammy to someone, or
am I just going to accept thefact that I'm not going to make
any sales this month and 99 outof 100 people will choose to
accept the fact that they're notgoing to make any sales because
(27:37):
that's better than being out ofintegrity.
Does that make sense?
And that is why all of my adsfor the questions that convert
say something like without beingspammy, without like, I
literally take the limitingbelief.
I find out what your limitingbeliefs are about the things I'm
going to teach, and then I usetitles and subtitles to overcome
(28:00):
the limiting belief you haveabout the thing I'm going to
teach so that you're more opento learning it.
When you understand thesubconscious mind, friends, it
becomes a hundred times easierto fix your mindset.
It also makes you a genius atsales and marketing when you
start applying it to themessaging and the way you
interact with others.
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