September 26, 2025 • 53 mins
308 | Alexandra Mann
Who among us doesn’t love a good movie? And how many times have you been watching a film and, jump scare, some terrible adoptee trope comes out of nowhere. Today’s guest, Alexandra Mann had that happen one too many times and what grew out of that all too common adoptee misrepresentation in the media, was the Adoptee Film Fest which is now in it’s second year (spotlighting adoptee filmmakers, telling adoptee stories). Alexandra shares about her personal story as a domestic, transracial adoptee from Hong Kong, and how therapy preserved her relationship with her adoptive parents after a giant secret came to light. We do have a mention of suicidal ideation in this conversation so please listen with care.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Haley Radke (00:00):
This podcast is for educational and
entertainment purposes only.
Nothing stated on it either by its hostsor any guests, is to be construed as
psychological, medical, or legal advice.
You are listening to AdopteesOn the podcast where adoptees
(00:20):
discuss the adoption experience.
I'm Haley Radke.
Who among us doesn't love a good movie?
And how many times have you beenwatching a film and a jump scare?
Some terrible adopteetrope comes outta nowhere.
Today's guest, Alexandra Mann hadthat happen one too many times.
(00:40):
And what grew out of that all too commonadoptee misrepresentation in the media
was the Adoptee Film Fest, which is nowin its second year, spotlighting adoptee
filmmakers telling adoptee stories.
Alexandra shares about her personal storyas a domestic transracial adoptee from
(01:00):
Hong Kong, and how therapy preserved herrelationship with her adoptive parents
after a giant secret came to light.
We do have a mention of suicidalideation in this conversation,
so please listen with care.
Before we get started, I wanted topersonally invite you to join our
Patreon adoptee community today overon adopteeson.com/community, which
(01:23):
helps support you and also the show tosupport more adoptees around the world.
We wrap up with somerecommended resources.
A chance to meet in person in New YorkCity in November, 2025, and as always
links to everything we'll be talking abouttoday are on the website, adopteeson.com.
Let's listen in.
(01:45):
I'm so pleased to welcome toAdoptees On Alexandra Mann.
Hello, Alexandra.
Alexandra Mann (01:51):
This is crazy Haley.
Haley Radke (01:53):
She's speechless.
Alexandra Mann (01:54):
Hi.
Hi Haley.
I am speechless.
I am speechless.
I am so happy to be here.
Thank you so much for having me on.
I can't, this is my first timetalking to you, meeting you.
So the fact that you justintroduced me, excuse me, everyone
for a moment I am freaking out.
But.
(02:16):
Just because Adoptees On was thefirst adoptee podcast I ever listened
to in a desperate time of need.
So this is just really full circlefor me and I really can't believe it.
Haley Radke (02:27):
Oh, thank you.
I'm so glad the show could bethere for you in a critical time.
That's amazing.
Alexandra Mann (02:34):
Yeah, no, it really was my adoptee therapist.
This was before I had adoptee community.
I was out in Hong Kong doing a birthsearch for looking for my birth mother.
And yeah, my therapist was like you shouldlisten to some podcasts and gave me three.
She recommended yours being one ofthem and yeah I binge listened to
(02:58):
all the ones where you interviewedtransracial adoptees, just 'cause that's
where my pain was at the time, thanksfor being that incredible resource.
It honestly was really fundamental forme and understanding that I'm not alone,
which seems, obviously very funny nowwhere half of my community are adoptees.
But yeah, it was very isolating, asa lot of us know and your podcast
(03:22):
brought me just, a little taste ofwhat that community could look like
and that I was very much not alone.
Haley Radke (03:30):
Oh,
Alexandra Mann (03:31):
This is very special.
Haley Radke (03:32):
Thank you.
Thanks for sharing that with me, and thankyou for being willing to share your story
because someone else is going to listen toyour episode, will be their first episode,
and they'll know they're not alone.
So that's pretty cool.
Let's start there.
Do you wanna share someof your story with us?
Alexandra Mann (03:50):
Yeah, absolutely.
I'm a domestic transracial adoptee fromHong Kong, so basically let's break
that down 'cause I do think it's rare.
At least in my community here inNew York I don't know a single other
domestic transracial adoptee from Asia.
So essentially, my parents, mymom's Texan, my dad's from England.
(04:12):
They were expats.
They lived out in Hong Kong for 35years and during that time, they adopted
my sister and I was adopted at fivemonths old and grew up in Hong Kong.
I will say that.
Before then.
I've since learned because I received aletter from my birth mother or my parents.
(04:32):
My adopted parents were given a letterfrom my birth mother when they adopted me.
I didn't find this out until I was 26.
Haley Radke (04:44):
How did you find the letter?
Alexandra Mann (04:45):
My dad and I got into a big fight about BLM
that was going on at the time.
He for some reason felt like itwas relevant to tell me that now.
So yeah, a lot of us as transracialadoptees know that it could be hard, to
have these kind of conversations withour parents, and I definitely experienced
that for five years, and this was thepeak of it at the end of those five years.
(05:08):
And yeah he told, even though, in my mindthose are very separate conversations
and I need to caveat this with by sayingthat period in life almost broke my
adoptee family apart, but adopted family.
Sorry.
Having come out of it and come throughit, having worked through it with them
now, we all got adoptee therapists.
(05:31):
My sister, me, my parents, andthree, four years later now, we
are so much stronger because of it.
And I don't need it to be, I'm nottrying to be like, oh, this is a story
where we were able to work it out'cause I know that's not the case with
everyone, but we would not be as closefor sure if we hadn't had that period.
(05:52):
Yeah, so TLDR, me and my dad,we were able to work it out.
Honestly, we were really closebefore that, so it was heartbreaking.
Absolutely.
I felt a lot of betrayal.
He knows all this.
I think it's very okay to share.
Haley Radke (06:06):
Can I ask you, looking back on it, when do you wish
they had given you that letter?
Alexandra Mann (06:14):
I wish that it had been, part of the conversation around when
they were first starting to tell methat I was adopted to normalize it, to
normalize my birth mother in my life.
I think a lot of people's default is tothink, oh, once I turn 18, even my birth
mother in the letter, the first line is,you are now 18 and I am blah, blah, blah.
(06:37):
But no I honestly wish it had.
I wish it had been in my life andpart of those conversations, why
does it need to be a secret at all?
It makes you feel like there needs tobe shame around this secret letter.
When I wish I had known the information init all along, my parents hadn't read it.
(06:58):
It was in Chinese before they hadgiven it to me, but it answered a
lot of the questions I had alwayswondered about my adoption and my past.
Yeah, what I think if it hadbeen done that way, some of
the anger and the feeling ofbetrayal wouldn't have been there.
Haley Radke (07:16):
So in recent years, you got this and what did your mother tell you?
Alexandra Mann (07:24):
My birth mother told me that she was 15 when she had me, I, that
was the only piece of information thatI actually knew that my parents had told
me about her, I had always been toldthat the reason why you were relinquished
was because you're birth mother.
Both my sister and I separatebirth mothers, but we had the same
(07:47):
situation when they were teenagers.
And teenagers shouldn't raise children.
And I believe this so much to a pointthat I remember when I as a teenager.
There was someone in high school, a coupleyears older than me and my friends who
got pregnant, and I she kept the baby.
And I just remember thinking,this is morally wrong, blah,
(08:09):
blah, blah, blah, blah.
If she really loved the kid orherself, she would relinquish them.
And obviously looking back I'mlike, whoa, what the actual hell?
But I don't believe that now, obviously,but it was so ingrained in, into me that
this was an act of love and that becauseit happened to me and look at all the
(08:29):
amazing things that I was adopted intoand the love I had, that this was the
right course of actions for women inthat situation, which is really funny
thinking about looking back and sad,but yeah it, she detailed her situation.
Her and my birth father had been inlove since they were 11, and because
(08:53):
of the laws in Hong Kong, she didn'ttell anyone about the pregnancy.
She did share that she had,sorry, trigger warning.
Suicidal ideation andthat she really loved me.
She told me what my name meant.
She told me what time I was born,so now I know I'm a Libra rising.
That's so sick.
Haley Radke (09:17):
No, but a lot of people don't have that.
It was, and especiallytransracial adoptees where
they get like the birth window.
I think I was born inthis month long period.
Alexandra Mann (09:29):
CoStar had me down as sag before this, so that didn't feel right.
But yeah, apparently my, the name, shegave me Lee, Yin Ning, she says that
it means growing up safe and sound,which is obviously very emotional.
But yeah, she says she loves me so much.
This is the hardest thingshe'd ever done in her life.
(09:52):
And she hopes thatshe'll be able to see me.
Please don't forget abouther, she'll always be here.
And you can tell that a 15-year-oldwrote this on stationary because the
stationary, the piece of paper, it'swritten on has cartoon monkeys and hearts.
And at the top it says, come findme if you ever have a problem.
I'm sorry, but what?
That's the only English on thewhole letter from that stationary.
(10:14):
So yeah, I was absolutely a messwhen I received this letter bawling,
so it was quite hard because I wastold about the letter, on FaceTime.
I live in New York.
My parents are living in Hong Kongat the time, and it was during 2020.
So at the end of 2020 I learn about thisand then I have to quarantine in Hong
(10:35):
Kong in a hotel by myself for two weeksbefore I can leave and see my mom and dad.
And so there's it wasa lot of anticipation.
I found out in October, late October, andI didn't receive it until I was released
from quarantine over Christmas time.
So yeah, it was a lot I gotreleased at midnight from the hotel
(11:02):
and drove home with my parents whoI hadn't been really speaking to
that much, since they had told me.
So it was all very crazy.
But yeah, absolute mess bawling andit's so funny because when I was
reading this, it was such a mix ofemotions where I was in a place where.
(11:26):
I was feeling really betrayed and hurtby my mom and dad, but at the same time
reading this letter, really yearning fortheir comfort and their cuddles during it.
So it's literal, absolute dissonanceduring that period with them.
It just, yeah, it felt mind rocking.
I feel like my friend Lindsay,she always tells people that when
(11:48):
you find out new information aboutyourself as an adoptee, it feels like
you're Peter Pan and the, Peter Panhas a shadow self that's separate.
When you find new informationout, you have to it takes time,
but you have they eventually willsew them together, when you, it
really feels outta body and who me?
You're talking about me.
(12:08):
It's hard to put that together.
Haley Radke (12:11):
Okay.
Are you comfortable talking abouthow you all got your own therapists?
What did that look like?
And did you have any sessions whereyou talked together just for folk?
Lots of people are dealing with hardthings in relationship with their
adoptive parents and often it justgoes to estrangement and we don't
(12:35):
talk about the, what could you do inbetween to help bridge some of that?
Alexandra Mann (12:40):
Oh my gosh.
First off, yeah, it, you're right.
It is a very emotional topic.
I am sorry, I'm just lookingat your face right now.
And yeah it's really tough and Iso empathize and I'm there with
folks who have this experience.
I'm not sharing this to be like,this is what you should do.
(13:01):
I really don't.
I was in survival mode.
I'm looking back and I'm grateful thingsturned out the way they did, but they very
much might have not turned out this way.
So when I went to college, that'swhat I was a social sciences major
and so I learned about socialpolitics for the first time.
That which not something wetalked about in Hong Kong at all.
(13:24):
And I never had questionedmy transracial reality.
I very much thought I waswhite, I knew I wasn't.
So many of us transracial adoptee thinkin our head sometimes we're white.
And I just really rejected a lot of myAsianness, my Chineseness, and just why I
didn't want the white people to find outmy secret that I was actually Chinese.
(13:47):
So by the time I get tocollege, my mind's blasted.
I go to one of the most liberaluniversities in Canada, UBC is a
public university on the West coast.
So my, i'm learning so much.
I become what I think a lot of people inHong Kong at least when I would return,
called me in their heads I was a socialjustice warrior to them because, why isn't
(14:11):
anyone talking about any of the stuff?
And I detailed this to say that I hadbeen an already, a five year fight
almost with my mom and dad aboutrace and that my sister and I being
two transracial Chinese adoptees areChinese, are Asian, are people of color.
(14:32):
And what that meant, they werevery much initially racist.
First there was not conversationsthey had ever really had and they
struggled to believe that thiswas our reality and I felt really
whitewashed by a lot of my communityat the time who, I'd heard growing
(14:52):
up , we don't even see you as Chinese.
We don't even see you as Asian.
You're normal.
Because for context, while I grewup in Hong Kong, we were in the
expat community in Hong Kong.
Hong Kong was a Britishcolony until ninety six.
I was born in 95.
So even today there's colonial.
Colonial divide between the more affluentwhite expats, mostly white majority
(15:18):
whites and local Hong Kong Chinese people.
It's so separate, or atleast it was my reality.
My parents lived there for35 years and didn't have a
single friend of color really.
So that's what the environment Iwas having those conversations in.
So it was already charged.
So by the time I found outabout the letter, it was the
last straw where I was so mad.
(15:42):
So I was at a point where I just,I was so emotional, so angry.
I felt like I was theone who was trying to.
They felt maybe I was tryingto tear the family apart.
I felt I was actually trying to keep thefamily together by saying I need, we were
trying to have conversations around this.
Obviously my parents felt bleep awful.
(16:04):
They knew they had bleepup immediately, right?
But also were maybe trying to conveywhy they had chosen to do what they did,
even though they knew they had bleep up.
I need you to see me as.
Chinese as Asian, I needto see me and, sorry.
(16:25):
And that that wasn't happening.
There was just I felt really unheard.
I'd send them articles and things.
I really would appreciate if they wouldlisten to and read just to understand
where I was coming from, more just my lifea bit more and they wouldn't do it, we
just have very vast different perspectivesabout what I was trying to do.
And so I was at a point wherethis is too hard for me.
(16:47):
I felt so safe once withyou, but I feel so unsafe.
I feel so triggered.
I had stopped going to familyfriend functions at that time
because all white communities, andI didn't even feel that safety from
my own family, immediate family.
I dunno.
It just all felt so hard.
So yeah, around the time I got theletter, I honestly need to walk away or
(17:10):
I feel a desire to, and this is why Isay I don't recommend people doing this.
I was just at a point where I just feltlike I didn't have any more options and
I had wanted them to see a therapist oran talk to an adoptee therapist, which
is literally an adult adoptee, right?
Because they were all coming from me.
In their eyes, maybe their young child whohad been radicalized by UBC, I'm kidding.
(17:39):
But I just felt like anything Iwould say, wasn't really getting
through or taken seriously.
So I just wanted them to speak to someoneelse, which wasn't, they didn't wanna
do, didn't wanna do it was just awkward.
It was just silence would happen orwhen any of the stuff was brought up
and the fear, I guess that's commonin adopted parents, I guess in on
(18:01):
their end was really triggered, right?
They were like, we can't lose our child.
We don't wanna lose our child.
And so they agreed to startseeing an adoptee therapist.
They don't, yeah, so they sawthem for maybe a year on and off.
My sister also is in a reunionnow, so that was also going on, I
guess within those couple years.
So a helpful resource for all and itchanged everything because it went
(18:29):
from, I guess them not trying to, butit felt to me it was very dismissive
of what I was trying to talk to themabout all those years, which I will be
honest ended up in screaming matchesmost of the time 'cause it was such an
emotional thing for me to talk about.
And they felt, I guess looking backa lot of shame around their ability
(18:54):
as a parent, which is not what Iwas trying to get at all, right?
But that's what we werehearing from each other.
And so them being able tospeak to a therapist allowed
them to open up their minds.
And I had been the educator in my familyfor five, six years at that point.
And so it also took thatweight off my shoulders.
(19:17):
But yeah, they definitely sawwhere I was coming from a bit more
and allowed them to learn how tocreate that safe space for me.
And now I feel very safe with them.
In past where maybe something, a racistcomment might have happened, at a family
friend thing or at a family thing.
I, I trust, especially when mom I reallyfeel like she'd pick it up and I wouldn't
(19:40):
have to say this person just said this.
And then her being like whatdo you want me to do about it?
Or I don't think that's bad,or say something dismissive.
So it's looking back it always is funnyto reminisce on and wow, we've had such a
180 as a family that I'm really grateful.
I think for context as well.
(20:00):
Another layer I will add is that Ihad I did birth search, but the person
who may be my birth mother, repliedto the search and asked, please
don't reach out to this number again.
And so I, after all this felt thatrejection from my birth mother.
So I can see that perhaps the adopteein me is just not to be "grateful" for
(20:23):
my adoptive parents person or adoptee.
That's absolutely, not what I'mtrying to perpetuate here [gratitude].
Okay, that's not in my control.
That's probably, that'snot gonna happen now.
My parents are aging therelationships are very important
to me and I'm grateful we've beenable to rebuild a hundred percent.
They're truly some of my favorite people.
(20:43):
They are my favorite people in the world,and I'm so glad that we've been able
to come out of this stronger 'cause Iknow that doesn't happen for everyone.
Haley Radke (20:49):
Thank you for sharing the nitty gritty of it all, sincerely.
It's it'll be really helpful for a lotof people to hear, and I think a lot
of people don't understand the onus ofeducating adoptive parents is put on the
adopted person, and especially when we'reimmersed in this pro adoption culture
(21:16):
where the adoptee tropes are aplenty.
And I know you have bigfeelings about that.
So let's go there.
Can you take me to, or do you remember,so you're unpacking this adoption stuff.
You must be looking at media thingsin a little bit of a different light.
What do you remember?
Either TV movies, like seeing someadoptee representation and you're
(21:40):
like, this is so off base so wrong.
What are the ones thatcome to mind right away?
Alexandra Mann (21:49):
So I think in the period of the letter when I was home doing my
birth search, when I was going throughall this with my family, it's a four
month period where I was living in HongKong after Christmas that year because
I didn't wanna go back to New Yorkin case my birth mother reached out.
So I was right in it.
I didn't have adopteecommunity at the time.
(22:11):
I was living at home with myparents and my sister during COVID.
I was watching tv I remember I hadstarted this show called The Fosters,
and then it was also mid during,This Is Us still airing and both
shows, and I was watching that onthe same time, both shows had birth
(22:32):
mothers return to the adoptee's life.
And I think they were both reallynegatively portrayed, right?
I think in the Fosters thereare some drugs involved, someone
was looking for money Classic.
And then and This Is Us, the birthmothers also a drug addict who,
Randall was better off without
.And at the time I don't know, I just, I was finding it really triggering to
(22:56):
watch, but also recognizing, oh, thisis the trope, this is the common trope
that I feel I have been seeing allmy life, and just paying attention to
it for the first time and then thisis one of the classic tropes about
adoption that is always portrayed andstarted picking up on more and more.
(23:16):
The centering of white adoptiveparents most of the time in stories.
Think of, for example, Blindsidebeing the most famous one, and I
just, I didn't have creativity time.
I wanted mirroring.
That's why your podcast is so powerful,because I, it's okay, I'm not seeing it.
I don't wanna put words intomy mouth, but maybe I had that
(23:36):
conversation with my therapist.
I'm so triggered by thismedia, I'm consuming.
She was like, hey, stop consuming that.
Maybe just go to or turnto adoptee created sources.
Here are some podcasts.
I might be pulling that outta my ass,but wouldn't that be a lovely story?
So yeah, I was noticing all this.
I was crying in my journal, writing allof it down because I was not only feeling
(24:01):
misunderstood by the stories I was seeingon screen, I was feeling misunderstood by
everyone in my life at that point of time.
Even the lovely people who were tryingto understand and et cetera, it just
felt so isolating and I was just hypertriggered all the time and crying.
(24:24):
Crying, writing my journal.
Lowest I've ever felt,honestly, in my whole life.
So alone.
And I just had a moment where Iwas like, whoa, maybe survival.
But my brain just realized at that point,my North Star has to be championing
adoptee centered, adoptee createdadoption narratives because this is work.
(24:48):
I had a job in New York before thiswhere I was working, so the social impact
department at Vice Media Group, RIP.
And I was helping to identifyunderrepresented narratives
to weave into our content.
So I knew there's somewhat of a thingin the industry and I wasn't in touch
(25:08):
with my adoptee identity at the time.
I had not come into consciousnesswhen I had that job, so I didn't
think to champion our stories,which is so funny looking back now.
But yeah, that's where it all kicked off.
Haley Radke (25:23):
And so
Alexandra Mann (25:23):
Pain.
And need
Haley Radke (25:27):
Pain.
So your intense pain bore out thisidea for the Adoptee Film Fest, which I
attended virtually last year and was just,
Alexandra Mann (25:39):
thank you.
Haley Radke (25:40):
Oh, it just fed my soul, i've been podcasting for a long time.
I do my very best to highlight adopteesyou should know and highlight their work.
And we've had plenty of filmmakerson and it's hard for them to
get their stuff out there.
And if you're, especially if you'reindependent, it's really tough
(26:02):
to get eyeballs on these amazingstories and very important stories.
And so I was thrilled.
I was like, oh my gosh, I'm so happythat this is in the world, truly.
And yeah.
So you made a thing and it's now inits second year, was very successful.
(26:22):
Tell us about coming up withthe idea and tell us the story.
Alexandra Mann (26:28):
Yeah, absolutely.
So Haley, the Film Fest account probablystarted following you just because
you were you and Adoptees On was in myworld during that time where I literally
Haley Radke (26:40):
I gotta pause you here.
Okay.
Speaker (26:42):
Because people.
I just want you all to know, I didn'tknow that you listened to this show
ever until you filled up my guest forma few weeks ago, just so you know.
Okay.
So I did not have Alex on to gas me up.
Okay.
Sorry.
Go ahead.
Alexandra Mann (26:58):
Oh my God.
No.
I'm doing this completelyoutta my own passion.
I love that though.
I this, the film festival is versionthree, version two of what I had
initially wanted to do when I hadthat Pink Screens north star moment.
I knew I wanted to champion,adoptee storytellers, but it wasn't
(27:18):
manifested in the form of thefilm festival as we know it today.
It was just, I just wanted to getadoptees in media and entertainment
together to see how can we helpchampion adoptee, storytellers, adoptee
creators, adoptee, filmmakers, writers,who's in the room with us here?
(27:41):
Who's in the industry?
And.
That project quickly failed, but that'sprobably the account that followed you.
It was the Filmfest Instagramaccount, used to be called
the Adopting Media Collective.
Very short-lived.
But it's funny, I did meet acouple people on the selection
committee back in those days.
(28:02):
We had one meeting and then I wasair quotes, rejected from my birth
mother and completely abandoned theproject because I was abandoned.
So that was a thing that all happenedduring these four months in Hong Kong.
And so I came back to New York.
I was very much unemployed, I'd beenpart of a reorg cut at my company,
(28:28):
and so I was unemployed for 10months, and so that was the goal.
I needed to find a full-time job,but I couldn't let go of this
being a thing that I wanted to do.
I will say that after the hearing backfrom my birth mother, I didn't want
anything to do with the project orif I work on that, I just wanna not.
(28:52):
Nope.
Later I was just puttingeverything away into a box.
But the thing that helped meget out of that was my roommate
Lindsay, she's my best friend.
She was my first adult adoptee friend, andwe met each other online on Roomie, which
is an app like Tinder for roommates, andshe dragged me to my first adoptee event.
(29:15):
But also known as annualpicnic, and I did not wanna go.
I was like, Ugh, eye roll.
I do not wanna engage right now.
But it felt like I was on drugs when Iwas there in a good way, because I didn't
know, I just had such a visceral reactionto being in community for the first time.
It felt like I was high in agood way because I was like,
(29:39):
whoa, didn't know I needed this.
Euphoric.
But to go back to your originalquestion, Haley, two and a half
years down the line from this failedAdoptee Media Collective project,
I go to my friend's film festival.
They started the first trans andgender queer film festival and they
(30:02):
were in their third year at the time.
So I went and bleep this meansso much to this community.
You could feel it in the roomas an ally of this community.
I felt moved and inspired by this event.
It really was one of thosereally special events, super well
(30:23):
done where it's just, oh wow.
You walk away from it, I couldn'tshut up about it and whoa, it would
be so cool to do this for adoptees.
So that's the TLDR.
Sorry, very long-winded way.
I'd say I was inspired by myfriends film festival, but I
didn't know anything about film.
And the industry.
So I actually took two years to,educate myself, work on some film sets
(30:48):
during some periods of unemploymentand yeah, started it a couple years
after that through the long process.
There were two years where I was tellingpeople I was gonna do it and then wasn't.
Didn't I wasn't doing it, but here we are.
Yay.
We did it.
Thank God.
Haley Radke (31:05):
I think people don't realize how much work it is to
organize something this large.
It gets massive.
It takes so many people.
I used to work for ahuge conference company.
We did one conference a year andit was an enormous amount of work.
And and I know it'snot . It's volunteer, right?
(31:27):
So thank you for taking up thatweight and bringing it to life.
It's just incredible.
I'm so excited because I get tocome in person this year and yay.
So stoked.
Alexandra Mann (31:42):
I'm so excited,
Haley Radke (31:43):
so stoked.
So we'll get to meet.
Alexandra Mann (31:45):
Thank you for making the effort.
Haley Radke (31:46):
I promise we will get to meet for sure.
Alexandra Mann (31:48):
Wonderful.
Haley Radke (31:49):
I know you've seen so many films now, so this
year you have all the features.
Last year you started with shorts, andso how many can you make a estimate if
you don't know exactly how many shorts,adoptee, shorts have you seen and
features have you seen altogether fromall the submissions for a couple years?
Alexandra Mann (32:08):
Yeah, so last year we had 33 short submissions.
This year we had 18, it's 51.
Haley Radke (32:16):
We're good at math.
Okay.
51 shorts.
And how many features?
Alexandra Mann (32:22):
Features?
We got eight submissions this yearand it was the first time we did
it, so I've only seen those eight.
Yeah.
Haley Radke (32:29):
And have you personally watched?
Alexandra Mann (32:30):
Yes, I've seen everyone and then everyone on our
committee whose committees who areassigned to either shorts or features.
They've also watched every single film.
Haley Radke (32:41):
That's a lot of screen time.
Yes.
Alexandra Mann (32:44):
Yeah.
Haley Radke (32:45):
Okay.
So in viewing all of thesethings, what are you hoping
that people will create next?
What's, what are the gaps?
What's missing?
What do you want to see?
Alexandra Mann (32:58):
Oh my God.
Love that.
Love that so much.
I think so in terms of gaps.
Something that I get really excited aboutis when someone submits or tells me that
they're making a thriller or a comedy,we try in terms of our programming, one
of our goals is to write, show people andour community that we're not a monolith.
(33:21):
Right?
And just further that.
I think that it would be really coolfor our community to start telling
our stories in different genres justbecause we're not a monolith and so
are, I guess the formats of our stories.
Don't get me wrong, I love a good doc.
I love a good drama, but I'm hopingthat with the existence of the song
(33:43):
festival and now filmmakers havinghopefully this forum to communicate
to each other, there's, explorationallowed in how we're telling our
stories because they're so multifaceted.
There are so many differentways to tell them.
So that really excites me.
I also get excited whenpeople are unafraid to bear
(34:04):
or display angry adoptees.
I think even in our submissions,in our films, we're not seeing a
lot of that, which is cool, but.
I'm just thinking back to when I was,for example, in my angry, my angriest
air quotes adoptee space where even inadoptee spaces, I felt misunderstood
and I just haven't really seen anythingthat adequately conveys how I was.
(34:30):
I truly always encouraged and love tosee adoptees being angry because it feels
even within our community there's stillsome shame, a lot of shame around that.
But I want us to be free.
I just want us to be free.
Haley Radke (34:44):
Yeah.
Alexandra Mann (34:45):
To be,
Haley Radke (34:46):
I think, I feel like what I've seen in a lot of the
documentaries is it's real, butit's not quite all the way there.
Even when speaking with some of myfriends who've made docs that have,
made the rounds already and it'sthey still wanted it to be somewhat
(35:07):
palatable to the general public.
Alexandra Mann (35:10):
Yeah.
Haley Radke (35:10):
So yes, you're complicating the narrative a little bit for
people, but they felt like theycouldn't go all the way there yet.
And that's so sad, to even
sugarcoat your own story just sosomeone else will listen to it.
We shouldn't have to do that.
Alexandra Mann (35:26):
A hundred percent.
A hundred percent.
And I think we're self-censoringlike that all the time.
All the time.
And the last film festival, the firstone, when we were creating this project,
first and foremost, the primary targetaudience for it was adoptees 'cause
I was thinking of people like me whomaybe hadn't seen that mirroring or
felt that mirroring on screen, and notthat I don't think we're ever gonna
(35:51):
stray from that being for adoptees,being our primary target audience.
I don't know.
I hope that in building, continuing tobuild this community of people who are
hungry to see this mirroring, to seethese stories that we're able to help
(36:12):
create this safe space where filmmakersdon't feel the need to self-censor.
It's tough though, right?
Because obviously if you putso much time and effort into a
project and obviously want it to gobeyond the Adoptee Film Festival.
Yeah.
There's still so much.
(36:32):
I can understand thatself-censoring wholeheartedly.
And I hope long term, the film festivalhopes to be a vehicle to be able to
engage with the industry about theseconversations that need to be had and help
create some kind of path or understandingaround, telling these stories through
(36:52):
the adoptee lens in a authentic way wherethere allows more room to not self-censor.
And I think you're seeing that indifferent identity facets in Hollywood.
It's a very weird time right now,but we can all see hopefully, right?
How much more freedom Asiansin Hollywood have been able to
(37:19):
have in telling their stories.
It's a long journey.
We're tiny in comparison to the entireAsian community in Hollywood, for example.
And people still don't understand whyadoptee advocacy is a thing, right?
We still have to justify that in itself.
So it's gonna be a long battle, butultimately hope that we can do work
(37:44):
in the future that allows for morefreedom in us telling our stories in
ways where we don't have to censor.
Haley Radke (37:52):
Do you wanna make a film, Alexandra?
Alexandra Mann (37:56):
Oh my God, Haley.
I took a film class where we had to write,direct and produce our own short film.
And this was a year or two beforeI started the film festival.
And I wrote.
A script about my birth mother andkind of that period of me searching
and had some flashbacks to when she was15 relinquishing me, super short film.
(38:21):
I only was able to shoot thefirst opening scene because it
was just too fresh for me then.
I was still very much mid healing.
Not that I'm not always, but it was so rawat the time, and there was definitely a
sense in me that just wanted to run awayfrom that project just like I did with
(38:46):
the first adoptee media project I did.
And I also think that filmmakingtakes a lot of patience.
And can be, an up tofive plus year project.
And I'm very impatient.
Patience is not my middle name,so my background's in events.
(39:06):
So the film festival felt very naturalway for me to be able to still contribute
to this goal and this desire ofmine and this cause without stifling
myself in the long run on that becausethis is a safe way for me to do it.
This feels a productiveway for me to contribute.
(39:27):
Yes, maybe there's a bit of a barrier, butbecause I've had that firsthand experience
of how tough it was for me to eventhink of following through on straight,
finishing that short film I just havealso the utmost respect for anyone who is
able to do, especially people like Kristalwho have full on feature length films.
That's insane to me when I caneven finish a five minute film.
(39:51):
So I think this is great because Ithink one of my skills has always
been championing other people I reallybelieve in and giving pep talk, just
really putting people in the spotlight.
Yes and no.
It's not where I'm putting mytime and effort into right now.
At least.
Never say never, but I also nowthink we're surrounded by so many
(40:14):
amazing filmmakers who are sowonderful and talented that they're
where my energy is going right now.
Haley Radke (40:20):
Okay.
So if they're listening and they wannatell Alex's story, there's something
there that they can come to you with.
Okay, good.
Okay, let's talk our recommend resources.
And you mentioned Kristal.
So our friend Kristal Parke has thedocumentary Because She's Adopted
and you selected it as one of thefeatures for the Adoptee Film Fest.
(40:43):
But I really wanna encouragepeople come in person if you can.
So you are having, first time ever, it'sgonna be screening in New York and LA.
This time it's November 2025.
Alexandra Mann (40:58):
The feature film, sorry, only in New York.
Haley Radke (41:01):
Features in New York, but the shorts are gonna be New York and LA Yes.
Okay.
So I'm gonna come to New Yorkand I'm gonna see the shorts.
I think I'm gonna miss Kristalby a couple days, unfortunately.
I know.
Shocker.
Alexandra Mann (41:16):
Really no way.
Haley Radke (41:18):
I, you know what I, this is not a secret.
I still have children at home.
Alexandra Mann (41:23):
Yeah.
Haley Radke (41:24):
Who need my attention way more than you'd think.
And so I'm just thrilledI can even come midweek.
So I feel like I'malready doing what I can.
Speaker 2 (41:36):
Absolutely.
A hundred percent.
And so happy.
You're coming.
Thank you.
Haley Radke (41:39):
It takes me a whole day to get from Edmonton to New York,
and people also know I don't like tochange planes, and I'm gonna have to
do that too, so it's all a big deal.
Anyway, it's not about me.
Alexandra Mann (41:52):
Thank you for making the effort, Haley.
Haley Radke (41:53):
I'm so thrilled to be coming and so I hope to meet lots of you.
I hope you're all gonna come.
You're gonna support Alexandra's FilmFest, and for those of you who you can't
make it to New York, can't make it toLA there will be streaming online again.
Yes.
So folks can partake.
And I know you wanna talk aboutthat too 'cause what do you
(42:14):
wanna recommend to us today?
Alexandra Mann (42:16):
I would love to recommend, and I don't mean this to
be a promotional plug or anything.
Haley asked before this, recommenda singular resource that you think
it'd be really helpful to people,and I just genuinely believe in
that, the value and the power of it,because I know how much it helped me.
(42:39):
But the 2024 Adoptee Film Fest,short selections are still available
to watch and screen online untilNovember 20th of this year, 2025.
And when I first, and I say thisto say, when I first watched all of
the films in the order, we knew wewere gonna screen them in last year.
(43:01):
I just cried like a baby becauseit was everything I wish I had.
In my time of going through all thestuff, all the feelings of isolation and
being misunderstood with my own adopteeexperience and coming into consciousness.
So I just also really stand by it asa powerful and informative and helpful
(43:27):
resource to adoptees because , you get tosee yourself in these films in a lot of
different ways, even if they don't pertainexactly to what you're experiencing.
It's really, the filmmakers just areall very incredible and are able to
really convey and get so much across.
(43:49):
On our experience.
Haley Radke (43:50):
I love the selections from last year.
It's very inexpensive.
I think it was, it's $10 I think tostream American and I told you this
off air, but Sullivan Summer and I, wetalked through it all on Patreon last
year and we went through each film andwe critiqued, talk about what we loved
Alexandra Mann (44:09):
because I didn't know either of you.
Haley Radke (44:11):
So people might not know this about us Sullivan and I we're besties.
They probably know that but we lovemovies, especially horror movies.
And so we do these far away, quoteunquote movie dates where we'll
both go and see a horror movie onthe same day and talk about it.
We watched the film festand we yeah talked about it.
I love that there's differentstories represented.
(44:33):
There's a fiction doc cartoon,there's animated, and you're so
thoughtful about inclusivity andmaking sure everything's captioned.
You had things in other languages.
It was just so well done.
I am, I'm so thrilled for year two.
Congratulations on your success,and we hope we are gonna sell out
(44:57):
every single screening for you.
And yeah, we're championing youover here so we can people find.
Both the 2024 shorts, if they still wannacatch up, if they haven't seen those.
And then where are people gonnabe able to hear about how to get
tickets, how to come all the infofor Adoptee Film Fest for 2025?
Alexandra Mann (45:19):
People can find the link to stream our 2024 shorts reel,
either on our website, which isadopteefilmfest.com or on our Instagram
@adopteefilmfest in our link in bio there.
And in terms of tickets.
We're still finalizing some things withour venues who help us with our tickets,
(45:44):
but we're gonna start rolling them outthe goal is anyway, at the beginning
of October, that first week of October.
So yeah, very exciting.
We're gonna be in LA for our shortscreenings for the first time this
year, and that's really exciting.
We also.
As you have shared, we'll be doingfeature films for the first time in New
(46:07):
York City, so it's very exciting year.
We're quadrupling ourprogramming lots more to see.
Haley Radke (46:14):
Amazing.
And I'm gonna put my plug infor Kristal Parke's feature
screening, Because She's Adopted.
It's amazing.
I loved it.
It's very good.
And she screened it here inmy city and so I got to see it
in person with her and yeah.
Yeah, it was wonderful.
So way to go Kristal.
Congrats and congrats to you.
Well done.
(46:34):
Well done my new friend.
Alexandra Mann (46:35):
Thank you.
I appreciate it.
Haley Radke (46:38):
And where can folks connect with you online?
Alexandra Mann (46:40):
My Instagram is private, but if you wanna connect and be friends
my LinkedIn is linkedin.com/in/mann1.
And yeah, right now at least I'mthe one running the film festival
account on Instagram poorly.
I will say it's not my expertise,so sorry, but I'm there.
(47:02):
I'm there too.
Haley Radke (47:04):
Okay, great.
Come on to Instagram people.
Wonderful.
What a delight to get to know you today.
Thank you so much for sharing with us.
It's just been a real pleasure.
Alexandra Mann (47:15):
Thank you.
Haley Radke (47:19):
Okay, friend.
Here's your chance.
If you wanted to hang out in New YorkCity, please come hang out with me.
I am gonna attend the Adoptee Film Fest.
My plan is to be there on Thursday,November 6th, 2025, and our good friend
(47:42):
Sullivan Summer here at Adoptees On mostfolks will know her from her multiple
appearances on our Adoptees On Patreon.
She's also been on the main feed show.
You can scroll back andlisten to her episode.
We'll link it in the show notes.
Sullivan is my, one of my best friendsand she is going to be having a reading
(48:05):
and chapbook launch party on November8th, 2025, which I'm so excited to be
attending and cheering her on with that.
And we just have such an excitingweek planned so you have time.
We wanted to make sure you had thisepisode early so you can make your
travel plans and come hang out with us.
(48:28):
We would love to get to meet you inperson and support Alexandra and support
Sullivan in their adoptee endeavors.
So please come to New York.
We would love to have you ifyou're not able to make sure
you stream the film fest.
Or go in person on another night in LA orin New York, because the more we support
(48:53):
events like this, the more they are ableto be successful and grow and get adoptee
voices out into the broader culture.
So please support their initiatives.
Thank you so much for listening toadoptee voices and prioritizing them.
And I really appreciate you taking thetime to spend with us in your earbuds.
(49:16):
Thanks for listening.
Let's talk again very soon.
This podcast is for educational and
entertainment purposes only.
Nothing stated on it either by its hostsor any guests, is to be construed as
psychological, medical, or legal advice.
You are listening to AdopteesOn the podcast where adoptees
(00:20):
discuss the adoption experience.
I'm Haley Radke.
Who among us doesn't love a good movie?
And how many times have you beenwatching a film and a jump scare?
Some terrible adopteetrope comes outta nowhere.
Today's guest, Alexandra Mann hadthat happen one too many times.
(00:40):
And what grew out of that all too commonadoptee misrepresentation in the media
was the Adoptee Film Fest, which is nowin its second year, spotlighting adoptee
filmmakers telling adoptee stories.
Alexandra shares about her personal storyas a domestic transracial adoptee from
(01:00):
Hong Kong, and how therapy preserved herrelationship with her adoptive parents
after a giant secret came to light.
We do have a mention of suicidalideation in this conversation,
so please listen with care.
Before we get started, I wanted topersonally invite you to join our
Patreon adoptee community today overon adopteeson.com/community, which
(01:23):
helps support you and also the show tosupport more adoptees around the world.
We wrap up with somerecommended resources.
A chance to meet in person in New YorkCity in November, 2025, and as always
links to everything we'll be talking abouttoday are on the website, adopteeson.com.
Let's listen in.
(01:45):
I'm so pleased to welcome toAdoptees On Alexandra Mann.
Hello, Alexandra.
Alexandra Mann (01:51):
This is crazy Haley.
Haley Radke (01:53):
She's speechless.
Alexandra Mann (01:54):
Hi.
Hi Haley.
I am speechless.
I am speechless.
I am so happy to be here.
Thank you so much for having me on.
I can't, this is my first timetalking to you, meeting you.
So the fact that you justintroduced me, excuse me, everyone
for a moment I am freaking out.
But.
(02:16):
Just because Adoptees On was thefirst adoptee podcast I ever listened
to in a desperate time of need.
So this is just really full circlefor me and I really can't believe it.
Haley Radke (02:27):
Oh, thank you.
I'm so glad the show could bethere for you in a critical time.
That's amazing.
Alexandra Mann (02:34):
Yeah, no, it really was my adoptee therapist.
This was before I had adoptee community.
I was out in Hong Kong doing a birthsearch for looking for my birth mother.
And yeah, my therapist was like you shouldlisten to some podcasts and gave me three.
She recommended yours being one ofthem and yeah I binge listened to
(02:58):
all the ones where you interviewedtransracial adoptees, just 'cause that's
where my pain was at the time, thanksfor being that incredible resource.
It honestly was really fundamental forme and understanding that I'm not alone,
which seems, obviously very funny nowwhere half of my community are adoptees.
But yeah, it was very isolating, asa lot of us know and your podcast
(03:22):
brought me just, a little taste ofwhat that community could look like
and that I was very much not alone.
Haley Radke (03:30):
Oh,
Alexandra Mann (03:31):
This is very special.
Haley Radke (03:32):
Thank you.
Thanks for sharing that with me, and thankyou for being willing to share your story
because someone else is going to listen toyour episode, will be their first episode,
and they'll know they're not alone.
So that's pretty cool.
Let's start there.
Do you wanna share someof your story with us?
Alexandra Mann (03:50):
Yeah, absolutely.
I'm a domestic transracial adoptee fromHong Kong, so basically let's break
that down 'cause I do think it's rare.
At least in my community here inNew York I don't know a single other
domestic transracial adoptee from Asia.
So essentially, my parents, mymom's Texan, my dad's from England.
(04:12):
They were expats.
They lived out in Hong Kong for 35years and during that time, they adopted
my sister and I was adopted at fivemonths old and grew up in Hong Kong.
I will say that.
Before then.
I've since learned because I received aletter from my birth mother or my parents.
(04:32):
My adopted parents were given a letterfrom my birth mother when they adopted me.
I didn't find this out until I was 26.
Haley Radke (04:44):
How did you find the letter?
Alexandra Mann (04:45):
My dad and I got into a big fight about BLM
that was going on at the time.
He for some reason felt like itwas relevant to tell me that now.
So yeah, a lot of us as transracialadoptees know that it could be hard, to
have these kind of conversations withour parents, and I definitely experienced
that for five years, and this was thepeak of it at the end of those five years.
(05:08):
And yeah he told, even though, in my mindthose are very separate conversations
and I need to caveat this with by sayingthat period in life almost broke my
adoptee family apart, but adopted family.
Sorry.
Having come out of it and come throughit, having worked through it with them
now, we all got adoptee therapists.
(05:31):
My sister, me, my parents, andthree, four years later now, we
are so much stronger because of it.
And I don't need it to be, I'm nottrying to be like, oh, this is a story
where we were able to work it out'cause I know that's not the case with
everyone, but we would not be as closefor sure if we hadn't had that period.
(05:52):
Yeah, so TLDR, me and my dad,we were able to work it out.
Honestly, we were really closebefore that, so it was heartbreaking.
Absolutely.
I felt a lot of betrayal.
He knows all this.
I think it's very okay to share.
Haley Radke (06:06):
Can I ask you, looking back on it, when do you wish
they had given you that letter?
Alexandra Mann (06:14):
I wish that it had been, part of the conversation around when
they were first starting to tell methat I was adopted to normalize it, to
normalize my birth mother in my life.
I think a lot of people's default is tothink, oh, once I turn 18, even my birth
mother in the letter, the first line is,you are now 18 and I am blah, blah, blah.
(06:37):
But no I honestly wish it had.
I wish it had been in my life andpart of those conversations, why
does it need to be a secret at all?
It makes you feel like there needs tobe shame around this secret letter.
When I wish I had known the information init all along, my parents hadn't read it.
(06:58):
It was in Chinese before they hadgiven it to me, but it answered a
lot of the questions I had alwayswondered about my adoption and my past.
Yeah, what I think if it hadbeen done that way, some of
the anger and the feeling ofbetrayal wouldn't have been there.
Haley Radke (07:16):
So in recent years, you got this and what did your mother tell you?
Alexandra Mann (07:24):
My birth mother told me that she was 15 when she had me, I, that
was the only piece of information thatI actually knew that my parents had told
me about her, I had always been toldthat the reason why you were relinquished
was because you're birth mother.
Both my sister and I separatebirth mothers, but we had the same
(07:47):
situation when they were teenagers.
And teenagers shouldn't raise children.
And I believe this so much to a pointthat I remember when I as a teenager.
There was someone in high school, a coupleyears older than me and my friends who
got pregnant, and I she kept the baby.
And I just remember thinking,this is morally wrong, blah,
(08:09):
blah, blah, blah, blah.
If she really loved the kid orherself, she would relinquish them.
And obviously looking back I'mlike, whoa, what the actual hell?
But I don't believe that now, obviously,but it was so ingrained in, into me that
this was an act of love and that becauseit happened to me and look at all the
(08:29):
amazing things that I was adopted intoand the love I had, that this was the
right course of actions for women inthat situation, which is really funny
thinking about looking back and sad,but yeah it, she detailed her situation.
Her and my birth father had been inlove since they were 11, and because
(08:53):
of the laws in Hong Kong, she didn'ttell anyone about the pregnancy.
She did share that she had,sorry, trigger warning.
Suicidal ideation andthat she really loved me.
She told me what my name meant.
She told me what time I was born,so now I know I'm a Libra rising.
That's so sick.
Haley Radke (09:17):
No, but a lot of people don't have that.
It was, and especiallytransracial adoptees where
they get like the birth window.
I think I was born inthis month long period.
Alexandra Mann (09:29):
CoStar had me down as sag before this, so that didn't feel right.
But yeah, apparently my, the name, shegave me Lee, Yin Ning, she says that
it means growing up safe and sound,which is obviously very emotional.
But yeah, she says she loves me so much.
This is the hardest thingshe'd ever done in her life.
(09:52):
And she hopes thatshe'll be able to see me.
Please don't forget abouther, she'll always be here.
And you can tell that a 15-year-oldwrote this on stationary because the
stationary, the piece of paper, it'swritten on has cartoon monkeys and hearts.
And at the top it says, come findme if you ever have a problem.
I'm sorry, but what?
That's the only English on thewhole letter from that stationary.
(10:14):
So yeah, I was absolutely a messwhen I received this letter bawling,
so it was quite hard because I wastold about the letter, on FaceTime.
I live in New York.
My parents are living in Hong Kongat the time, and it was during 2020.
So at the end of 2020 I learn about thisand then I have to quarantine in Hong
(10:35):
Kong in a hotel by myself for two weeksbefore I can leave and see my mom and dad.
And so there's it wasa lot of anticipation.
I found out in October, late October, andI didn't receive it until I was released
from quarantine over Christmas time.
So yeah, it was a lot I gotreleased at midnight from the hotel
(11:02):
and drove home with my parents whoI hadn't been really speaking to
that much, since they had told me.
So it was all very crazy.
But yeah, absolute mess bawling andit's so funny because when I was
reading this, it was such a mix ofemotions where I was in a place where.
(11:26):
I was feeling really betrayed and hurtby my mom and dad, but at the same time
reading this letter, really yearning fortheir comfort and their cuddles during it.
So it's literal, absolute dissonanceduring that period with them.
It just, yeah, it felt mind rocking.
I feel like my friend Lindsay,she always tells people that when
(11:48):
you find out new information aboutyourself as an adoptee, it feels like
you're Peter Pan and the, Peter Panhas a shadow self that's separate.
When you find new informationout, you have to it takes time,
but you have they eventually willsew them together, when you, it
really feels outta body and who me?
You're talking about me.
(12:08):
It's hard to put that together.
Haley Radke (12:11):
Okay.
Are you comfortable talking abouthow you all got your own therapists?
What did that look like?
And did you have any sessions whereyou talked together just for folk?
Lots of people are dealing with hardthings in relationship with their
adoptive parents and often it justgoes to estrangement and we don't
(12:35):
talk about the, what could you do inbetween to help bridge some of that?
Alexandra Mann (12:40):
Oh my gosh.
First off, yeah, it, you're right.
It is a very emotional topic.
I am sorry, I'm just lookingat your face right now.
And yeah it's really tough and Iso empathize and I'm there with
folks who have this experience.
I'm not sharing this to be like,this is what you should do.
(13:01):
I really don't.
I was in survival mode.
I'm looking back and I'm grateful thingsturned out the way they did, but they very
much might have not turned out this way.
So when I went to college, that'swhat I was a social sciences major
and so I learned about socialpolitics for the first time.
That which not something wetalked about in Hong Kong at all.
(13:24):
And I never had questionedmy transracial reality.
I very much thought I waswhite, I knew I wasn't.
So many of us transracial adoptee thinkin our head sometimes we're white.
And I just really rejected a lot of myAsianness, my Chineseness, and just why I
didn't want the white people to find outmy secret that I was actually Chinese.
(13:47):
So by the time I get tocollege, my mind's blasted.
I go to one of the most liberaluniversities in Canada, UBC is a
public university on the West coast.
So my, i'm learning so much.
I become what I think a lot of people inHong Kong at least when I would return,
called me in their heads I was a socialjustice warrior to them because, why isn't
(14:11):
anyone talking about any of the stuff?
And I detailed this to say that I hadbeen an already, a five year fight
almost with my mom and dad aboutrace and that my sister and I being
two transracial Chinese adoptees areChinese, are Asian, are people of color.
(14:32):
And what that meant, they werevery much initially racist.
First there was not conversationsthey had ever really had and they
struggled to believe that thiswas our reality and I felt really
whitewashed by a lot of my communityat the time who, I'd heard growing
(14:52):
up , we don't even see you as Chinese.
We don't even see you as Asian.
You're normal.
Because for context, while I grewup in Hong Kong, we were in the
expat community in Hong Kong.
Hong Kong was a Britishcolony until ninety six.
I was born in 95.
So even today there's colonial.
Colonial divide between the more affluentwhite expats, mostly white majority
(15:18):
whites and local Hong Kong Chinese people.
It's so separate, or atleast it was my reality.
My parents lived there for35 years and didn't have a
single friend of color really.
So that's what the environment Iwas having those conversations in.
So it was already charged.
So by the time I found outabout the letter, it was the
last straw where I was so mad.
(15:42):
So I was at a point where I just,I was so emotional, so angry.
I felt like I was theone who was trying to.
They felt maybe I was tryingto tear the family apart.
I felt I was actually trying to keep thefamily together by saying I need, we were
trying to have conversations around this.
Obviously my parents felt bleep awful.
(16:04):
They knew they had bleepup immediately, right?
But also were maybe trying to conveywhy they had chosen to do what they did,
even though they knew they had bleep up.
I need you to see me as.
Chinese as Asian, I needto see me and, sorry.
(16:25):
And that that wasn't happening.
There was just I felt really unheard.
I'd send them articles and things.
I really would appreciate if they wouldlisten to and read just to understand
where I was coming from, more just my lifea bit more and they wouldn't do it, we
just have very vast different perspectivesabout what I was trying to do.
And so I was at a point wherethis is too hard for me.
(16:47):
I felt so safe once withyou, but I feel so unsafe.
I feel so triggered.
I had stopped going to familyfriend functions at that time
because all white communities, andI didn't even feel that safety from
my own family, immediate family.
I dunno.
It just all felt so hard.
So yeah, around the time I got theletter, I honestly need to walk away or
(17:10):
I feel a desire to, and this is why Isay I don't recommend people doing this.
I was just at a point where I just feltlike I didn't have any more options and
I had wanted them to see a therapist oran talk to an adoptee therapist, which
is literally an adult adoptee, right?
Because they were all coming from me.
In their eyes, maybe their young child whohad been radicalized by UBC, I'm kidding.
(17:39):
But I just felt like anything Iwould say, wasn't really getting
through or taken seriously.
So I just wanted them to speak to someoneelse, which wasn't, they didn't wanna
do, didn't wanna do it was just awkward.
It was just silence would happen orwhen any of the stuff was brought up
and the fear, I guess that's commonin adopted parents, I guess in on
(18:01):
their end was really triggered, right?
They were like, we can't lose our child.
We don't wanna lose our child.
And so they agreed to startseeing an adoptee therapist.
They don't, yeah, so they sawthem for maybe a year on and off.
My sister also is in a reunionnow, so that was also going on, I
guess within those couple years.
So a helpful resource for all and itchanged everything because it went
(18:29):
from, I guess them not trying to, butit felt to me it was very dismissive
of what I was trying to talk to themabout all those years, which I will be
honest ended up in screaming matchesmost of the time 'cause it was such an
emotional thing for me to talk about.
And they felt, I guess looking backa lot of shame around their ability
(18:54):
as a parent, which is not what Iwas trying to get at all, right?
But that's what we werehearing from each other.
And so them being able tospeak to a therapist allowed
them to open up their minds.
And I had been the educator in my familyfor five, six years at that point.
And so it also took thatweight off my shoulders.
(19:17):
But yeah, they definitely sawwhere I was coming from a bit more
and allowed them to learn how tocreate that safe space for me.
And now I feel very safe with them.
In past where maybe something, a racistcomment might have happened, at a family
friend thing or at a family thing.
I, I trust, especially when mom I reallyfeel like she'd pick it up and I wouldn't
(19:40):
have to say this person just said this.
And then her being like whatdo you want me to do about it?
Or I don't think that's bad,or say something dismissive.
So it's looking back it always is funnyto reminisce on and wow, we've had such a
180 as a family that I'm really grateful.
I think for context as well.
(20:00):
Another layer I will add is that Ihad I did birth search, but the person
who may be my birth mother, repliedto the search and asked, please
don't reach out to this number again.
And so I, after all this felt thatrejection from my birth mother.
So I can see that perhaps the adopteein me is just not to be "grateful" for
(20:23):
my adoptive parents person or adoptee.
That's absolutely, not what I'mtrying to perpetuate here [gratitude].
Okay, that's not in my control.
That's probably, that'snot gonna happen now.
My parents are aging therelationships are very important
to me and I'm grateful we've beenable to rebuild a hundred percent.
They're truly some of my favorite people.
(20:43):
They are my favorite people in the world,and I'm so glad that we've been able
to come out of this stronger 'cause Iknow that doesn't happen for everyone.
Haley Radke (20:49):
Thank you for sharing the nitty gritty of it all, sincerely.
It's it'll be really helpful for a lotof people to hear, and I think a lot
of people don't understand the onus ofeducating adoptive parents is put on the
adopted person, and especially when we'reimmersed in this pro adoption culture
(21:16):
where the adoptee tropes are aplenty.
And I know you have bigfeelings about that.
So let's go there.
Can you take me to, or do you remember,so you're unpacking this adoption stuff.
You must be looking at media thingsin a little bit of a different light.
What do you remember?
Either TV movies, like seeing someadoptee representation and you're
(21:40):
like, this is so off base so wrong.
What are the ones thatcome to mind right away?
Alexandra Mann (21:49):
So I think in the period of the letter when I was home doing my
birth search, when I was going throughall this with my family, it's a four
month period where I was living in HongKong after Christmas that year because
I didn't wanna go back to New Yorkin case my birth mother reached out.
So I was right in it.
I didn't have adopteecommunity at the time.
(22:11):
I was living at home with myparents and my sister during COVID.
I was watching tv I remember I hadstarted this show called The Fosters,
and then it was also mid during,This Is Us still airing and both
shows, and I was watching that onthe same time, both shows had birth
(22:32):
mothers return to the adoptee's life.
And I think they were both reallynegatively portrayed, right?
I think in the Fosters thereare some drugs involved, someone
was looking for money Classic.
And then and This Is Us, the birthmothers also a drug addict who,
Randall was better off without
.And at the time I don't know, I just, I was finding it really triggering to
(22:56):
watch, but also recognizing, oh, thisis the trope, this is the common trope
that I feel I have been seeing allmy life, and just paying attention to
it for the first time and then thisis one of the classic tropes about
adoption that is always portrayed andstarted picking up on more and more.
(23:16):
The centering of white adoptiveparents most of the time in stories.
Think of, for example, Blindsidebeing the most famous one, and I
just, I didn't have creativity time.
I wanted mirroring.
That's why your podcast is so powerful,because I, it's okay, I'm not seeing it.
I don't wanna put words intomy mouth, but maybe I had that
(23:36):
conversation with my therapist.
I'm so triggered by thismedia, I'm consuming.
She was like, hey, stop consuming that.
Maybe just go to or turnto adoptee created sources.
Here are some podcasts.
I might be pulling that outta my ass,but wouldn't that be a lovely story?
So yeah, I was noticing all this.
I was crying in my journal, writing allof it down because I was not only feeling
(24:01):
misunderstood by the stories I was seeingon screen, I was feeling misunderstood by
everyone in my life at that point of time.
Even the lovely people who were tryingto understand and et cetera, it just
felt so isolating and I was just hypertriggered all the time and crying.
(24:24):
Crying, writing my journal.
Lowest I've ever felt,honestly, in my whole life.
So alone.
And I just had a moment where Iwas like, whoa, maybe survival.
But my brain just realized at that point,my North Star has to be championing
adoptee centered, adoptee createdadoption narratives because this is work.
(24:48):
I had a job in New York before thiswhere I was working, so the social impact
department at Vice Media Group, RIP.
And I was helping to identifyunderrepresented narratives
to weave into our content.
So I knew there's somewhat of a thingin the industry and I wasn't in touch
(25:08):
with my adoptee identity at the time.
I had not come into consciousnesswhen I had that job, so I didn't
think to champion our stories,which is so funny looking back now.
But yeah, that's where it all kicked off.
Haley Radke (25:23):
And so
Alexandra Mann (25:23):
Pain.
And need
Haley Radke (25:27):
Pain.
So your intense pain bore out thisidea for the Adoptee Film Fest, which I
attended virtually last year and was just,
Alexandra Mann (25:39):
thank you.
Haley Radke (25:40):
Oh, it just fed my soul, i've been podcasting for a long time.
I do my very best to highlight adopteesyou should know and highlight their work.
And we've had plenty of filmmakerson and it's hard for them to
get their stuff out there.
And if you're, especially if you'reindependent, it's really tough
(26:02):
to get eyeballs on these amazingstories and very important stories.
And so I was thrilled.
I was like, oh my gosh, I'm so happythat this is in the world, truly.
And yeah.
So you made a thing and it's now inits second year, was very successful.
(26:22):
Tell us about coming up withthe idea and tell us the story.
Alexandra Mann (26:28):
Yeah, absolutely.
So Haley, the Film Fest account probablystarted following you just because
you were you and Adoptees On was in myworld during that time where I literally
Haley Radke (26:40):
I gotta pause you here.
Okay.
Speaker (26:42):
Because people.
I just want you all to know, I didn'tknow that you listened to this show
ever until you filled up my guest forma few weeks ago, just so you know.
Okay.
So I did not have Alex on to gas me up.
Okay.
Sorry.
Go ahead.
Alexandra Mann (26:58):
Oh my God.
No.
I'm doing this completelyoutta my own passion.
I love that though.
I this, the film festival is versionthree, version two of what I had
initially wanted to do when I hadthat Pink Screens north star moment.
I knew I wanted to champion,adoptee storytellers, but it wasn't
(27:18):
manifested in the form of thefilm festival as we know it today.
It was just, I just wanted to getadoptees in media and entertainment
together to see how can we helpchampion adoptee, storytellers, adoptee
creators, adoptee, filmmakers, writers,who's in the room with us here?
(27:41):
Who's in the industry?
And.
That project quickly failed, but that'sprobably the account that followed you.
It was the Filmfest Instagramaccount, used to be called
the Adopting Media Collective.
Very short-lived.
But it's funny, I did meet acouple people on the selection
committee back in those days.
(28:02):
We had one meeting and then I wasair quotes, rejected from my birth
mother and completely abandoned theproject because I was abandoned.
So that was a thing that all happenedduring these four months in Hong Kong.
And so I came back to New York.
I was very much unemployed, I'd beenpart of a reorg cut at my company,
(28:28):
and so I was unemployed for 10months, and so that was the goal.
I needed to find a full-time job,but I couldn't let go of this
being a thing that I wanted to do.
I will say that after the hearing backfrom my birth mother, I didn't want
anything to do with the project orif I work on that, I just wanna not.
(28:52):
Nope.
Later I was just puttingeverything away into a box.
But the thing that helped meget out of that was my roommate
Lindsay, she's my best friend.
She was my first adult adoptee friend, andwe met each other online on Roomie, which
is an app like Tinder for roommates, andshe dragged me to my first adoptee event.
(29:15):
But also known as annualpicnic, and I did not wanna go.
I was like, Ugh, eye roll.
I do not wanna engage right now.
But it felt like I was on drugs when Iwas there in a good way, because I didn't
know, I just had such a visceral reactionto being in community for the first time.
It felt like I was high in agood way because I was like,
(29:39):
whoa, didn't know I needed this.
Euphoric.
But to go back to your originalquestion, Haley, two and a half
years down the line from this failedAdoptee Media Collective project,
I go to my friend's film festival.
They started the first trans andgender queer film festival and they
(30:02):
were in their third year at the time.
So I went and bleep this meansso much to this community.
You could feel it in the roomas an ally of this community.
I felt moved and inspired by this event.
It really was one of thosereally special events, super well
(30:23):
done where it's just, oh wow.
You walk away from it, I couldn'tshut up about it and whoa, it would
be so cool to do this for adoptees.
So that's the TLDR.
Sorry, very long-winded way.
I'd say I was inspired by myfriends film festival, but I
didn't know anything about film.
And the industry.
So I actually took two years to,educate myself, work on some film sets
(30:48):
during some periods of unemploymentand yeah, started it a couple years
after that through the long process.
There were two years where I was tellingpeople I was gonna do it and then wasn't.
Didn't I wasn't doing it, but here we are.
Yay.
We did it.
Thank God.
Haley Radke (31:05):
I think people don't realize how much work it is to
organize something this large.
It gets massive.
It takes so many people.
I used to work for ahuge conference company.
We did one conference a year andit was an enormous amount of work.
And and I know it'snot . It's volunteer, right?
(31:27):
So thank you for taking up thatweight and bringing it to life.
It's just incredible.
I'm so excited because I get tocome in person this year and yay.
So stoked.
Alexandra Mann (31:42):
I'm so excited,
Haley Radke (31:43):
so stoked.
So we'll get to meet.
Alexandra Mann (31:45):
Thank you for making the effort.
Haley Radke (31:46):
I promise we will get to meet for sure.
Alexandra Mann (31:48):
Wonderful.
Haley Radke (31:49):
I know you've seen so many films now, so this
year you have all the features.
Last year you started with shorts, andso how many can you make a estimate if
you don't know exactly how many shorts,adoptee, shorts have you seen and
features have you seen altogether fromall the submissions for a couple years?
Alexandra Mann (32:08):
Yeah, so last year we had 33 short submissions.
This year we had 18, it's 51.
Haley Radke (32:16):
We're good at math.
Okay.
51 shorts.
And how many features?
Alexandra Mann (32:22):
Features?
We got eight submissions this yearand it was the first time we did
it, so I've only seen those eight.
Yeah.
Haley Radke (32:29):
And have you personally watched?
Alexandra Mann (32:30):
Yes, I've seen everyone and then everyone on our
committee whose committees who areassigned to either shorts or features.
They've also watched every single film.
Haley Radke (32:41):
That's a lot of screen time.
Yes.
Alexandra Mann (32:44):
Yeah.
Haley Radke (32:45):
Okay.
So in viewing all of thesethings, what are you hoping
that people will create next?
What's, what are the gaps?
What's missing?
What do you want to see?
Alexandra Mann (32:58):
Oh my God.
Love that.
Love that so much.
I think so in terms of gaps.
Something that I get really excited aboutis when someone submits or tells me that
they're making a thriller or a comedy,we try in terms of our programming, one
of our goals is to write, show people andour community that we're not a monolith.
(33:21):
Right?
And just further that.
I think that it would be really coolfor our community to start telling
our stories in different genres justbecause we're not a monolith and so
are, I guess the formats of our stories.
Don't get me wrong, I love a good doc.
I love a good drama, but I'm hopingthat with the existence of the song
(33:43):
festival and now filmmakers havinghopefully this forum to communicate
to each other, there's, explorationallowed in how we're telling our
stories because they're so multifaceted.
There are so many differentways to tell them.
So that really excites me.
I also get excited whenpeople are unafraid to bear
(34:04):
or display angry adoptees.
I think even in our submissions,in our films, we're not seeing a
lot of that, which is cool, but.
I'm just thinking back to when I was,for example, in my angry, my angriest
air quotes adoptee space where even inadoptee spaces, I felt misunderstood
and I just haven't really seen anythingthat adequately conveys how I was.
(34:30):
I truly always encouraged and love tosee adoptees being angry because it feels
even within our community there's stillsome shame, a lot of shame around that.
But I want us to be free.
I just want us to be free.
Haley Radke (34:44):
Yeah.
Alexandra Mann (34:45):
To be,
Haley Radke (34:46):
I think, I feel like what I've seen in a lot of the
documentaries is it's real, butit's not quite all the way there.
Even when speaking with some of myfriends who've made docs that have,
made the rounds already and it'sthey still wanted it to be somewhat
(35:07):
palatable to the general public.
Alexandra Mann (35:10):
Yeah.
Haley Radke (35:10):
So yes, you're complicating the narrative a little bit for
people, but they felt like theycouldn't go all the way there yet.
And that's so sad, to even
sugarcoat your own story just sosomeone else will listen to it.
We shouldn't have to do that.
Alexandra Mann (35:26):
A hundred percent.
A hundred percent.
And I think we're self-censoringlike that all the time.
All the time.
And the last film festival, the firstone, when we were creating this project,
first and foremost, the primary targetaudience for it was adoptees 'cause
I was thinking of people like me whomaybe hadn't seen that mirroring or
felt that mirroring on screen, and notthat I don't think we're ever gonna
(35:51):
stray from that being for adoptees,being our primary target audience.
I don't know.
I hope that in building, continuing tobuild this community of people who are
hungry to see this mirroring, to seethese stories that we're able to help
(36:12):
create this safe space where filmmakersdon't feel the need to self-censor.
It's tough though, right?
Because obviously if you putso much time and effort into a
project and obviously want it to gobeyond the Adoptee Film Festival.
Yeah.
There's still so much.
(36:32):
I can understand thatself-censoring wholeheartedly.
And I hope long term, the film festivalhopes to be a vehicle to be able to
engage with the industry about theseconversations that need to be had and help
create some kind of path or understandingaround, telling these stories through
(36:52):
the adoptee lens in a authentic way wherethere allows more room to not self-censor.
And I think you're seeing that indifferent identity facets in Hollywood.
It's a very weird time right now,but we can all see hopefully, right?
How much more freedom Asiansin Hollywood have been able to
(37:19):
have in telling their stories.
It's a long journey.
We're tiny in comparison to the entireAsian community in Hollywood, for example.
And people still don't understand whyadoptee advocacy is a thing, right?
We still have to justify that in itself.
So it's gonna be a long battle, butultimately hope that we can do work
(37:44):
in the future that allows for morefreedom in us telling our stories in
ways where we don't have to censor.
Haley Radke (37:52):
Do you wanna make a film, Alexandra?
Alexandra Mann (37:56):
Oh my God, Haley.
I took a film class where we had to write,direct and produce our own short film.
And this was a year or two beforeI started the film festival.
And I wrote.
A script about my birth mother andkind of that period of me searching
and had some flashbacks to when she was15 relinquishing me, super short film.
(38:21):
I only was able to shoot thefirst opening scene because it
was just too fresh for me then.
I was still very much mid healing.
Not that I'm not always, but it was so rawat the time, and there was definitely a
sense in me that just wanted to run awayfrom that project just like I did with
(38:46):
the first adoptee media project I did.
And I also think that filmmakingtakes a lot of patience.
And can be, an up tofive plus year project.
And I'm very impatient.
Patience is not my middle name,so my background's in events.
(39:06):
So the film festival felt very naturalway for me to be able to still contribute
to this goal and this desire ofmine and this cause without stifling
myself in the long run on that becausethis is a safe way for me to do it.
This feels a productiveway for me to contribute.
(39:27):
Yes, maybe there's a bit of a barrier, butbecause I've had that firsthand experience
of how tough it was for me to eventhink of following through on straight,
finishing that short film I just havealso the utmost respect for anyone who is
able to do, especially people like Kristalwho have full on feature length films.
That's insane to me when I caneven finish a five minute film.
(39:51):
So I think this is great because Ithink one of my skills has always
been championing other people I reallybelieve in and giving pep talk, just
really putting people in the spotlight.
Yes and no.
It's not where I'm putting mytime and effort into right now.
At least.
Never say never, but I also nowthink we're surrounded by so many
(40:14):
amazing filmmakers who are sowonderful and talented that they're
where my energy is going right now.
Haley Radke (40:20):
Okay.
So if they're listening and they wannatell Alex's story, there's something
there that they can come to you with.
Okay, good.
Okay, let's talk our recommend resources.
And you mentioned Kristal.
So our friend Kristal Parke has thedocumentary Because She's Adopted
and you selected it as one of thefeatures for the Adoptee Film Fest.
(40:43):
But I really wanna encouragepeople come in person if you can.
So you are having, first time ever, it'sgonna be screening in New York and LA.
This time it's November 2025.
Alexandra Mann (40:58):
The feature film, sorry, only in New York.
Haley Radke (41:01):
Features in New York, but the shorts are gonna be New York and LA Yes.
Okay.
So I'm gonna come to New Yorkand I'm gonna see the shorts.
I think I'm gonna miss Kristalby a couple days, unfortunately.
I know.
Shocker.
Alexandra Mann (41:16):
Really no way.
Haley Radke (41:18):
I, you know what I, this is not a secret.
I still have children at home.
Alexandra Mann (41:23):
Yeah.
Haley Radke (41:24):
Who need my attention way more than you'd think.
And so I'm just thrilledI can even come midweek.
So I feel like I'malready doing what I can.
Speaker 2 (41:36):
Absolutely.
A hundred percent.
And so happy.
You're coming.
Thank you.
Haley Radke (41:39):
It takes me a whole day to get from Edmonton to New York,
and people also know I don't like tochange planes, and I'm gonna have to
do that too, so it's all a big deal.
Anyway, it's not about me.
Alexandra Mann (41:52):
Thank you for making the effort, Haley.
Haley Radke (41:53):
I'm so thrilled to be coming and so I hope to meet lots of you.
I hope you're all gonna come.
You're gonna support Alexandra's FilmFest, and for those of you who you can't
make it to New York, can't make it toLA there will be streaming online again.
Yes.
So folks can partake.
And I know you wanna talk aboutthat too 'cause what do you
(42:14):
wanna recommend to us today?
Alexandra Mann (42:16):
I would love to recommend, and I don't mean this to
be a promotional plug or anything.
Haley asked before this, recommenda singular resource that you think
it'd be really helpful to people,and I just genuinely believe in
that, the value and the power of it,because I know how much it helped me.
(42:39):
But the 2024 Adoptee Film Fest,short selections are still available
to watch and screen online untilNovember 20th of this year, 2025.
And when I first, and I say thisto say, when I first watched all of
the films in the order, we knew wewere gonna screen them in last year.
(43:01):
I just cried like a baby becauseit was everything I wish I had.
In my time of going through all thestuff, all the feelings of isolation and
being misunderstood with my own adopteeexperience and coming into consciousness.
So I just also really stand by it asa powerful and informative and helpful
(43:27):
resource to adoptees because , you get tosee yourself in these films in a lot of
different ways, even if they don't pertainexactly to what you're experiencing.
It's really, the filmmakers just areall very incredible and are able to
really convey and get so much across.
(43:49):
On our experience.
Haley Radke (43:50):
I love the selections from last year.
It's very inexpensive.
I think it was, it's $10 I think tostream American and I told you this
off air, but Sullivan Summer and I, wetalked through it all on Patreon last
year and we went through each film andwe critiqued, talk about what we loved
Alexandra Mann (44:09):
because I didn't know either of you.
Haley Radke (44:11):
So people might not know this about us Sullivan and I we're besties.
They probably know that but we lovemovies, especially horror movies.
And so we do these far away, quoteunquote movie dates where we'll
both go and see a horror movie onthe same day and talk about it.
We watched the film festand we yeah talked about it.
I love that there's differentstories represented.
(44:33):
There's a fiction doc cartoon,there's animated, and you're so
thoughtful about inclusivity andmaking sure everything's captioned.
You had things in other languages.
It was just so well done.
I am, I'm so thrilled for year two.
Congratulations on your success,and we hope we are gonna sell out
(44:57):
every single screening for you.
And yeah, we're championing youover here so we can people find.
Both the 2024 shorts, if they still wannacatch up, if they haven't seen those.
And then where are people gonnabe able to hear about how to get
tickets, how to come all the infofor Adoptee Film Fest for 2025?
Alexandra Mann (45:19):
People can find the link to stream our 2024 shorts reel,
either on our website, which isadopteefilmfest.com or on our Instagram
@adopteefilmfest in our link in bio there.
And in terms of tickets.
We're still finalizing some things withour venues who help us with our tickets,
(45:44):
but we're gonna start rolling them outthe goal is anyway, at the beginning
of October, that first week of October.
So yeah, very exciting.
We're gonna be in LA for our shortscreenings for the first time this
year, and that's really exciting.
We also.
As you have shared, we'll be doingfeature films for the first time in New
(46:07):
York City, so it's very exciting year.
We're quadrupling ourprogramming lots more to see.
Haley Radke (46:14):
Amazing.
And I'm gonna put my plug infor Kristal Parke's feature
screening, Because She's Adopted.
It's amazing.
I loved it.
It's very good.
And she screened it here inmy city and so I got to see it
in person with her and yeah.
Yeah, it was wonderful.
So way to go Kristal.
Congrats and congrats to you.
Well done.
(46:34):
Well done my new friend.
Alexandra Mann (46:35):
Thank you.
I appreciate it.
Haley Radke (46:38):
And where can folks connect with you online?
Alexandra Mann (46:40):
My Instagram is private, but if you wanna connect and be friends
my LinkedIn is linkedin.com/in/mann1.
And yeah, right now at least I'mthe one running the film festival
account on Instagram poorly.
I will say it's not my expertise,so sorry, but I'm there.
(47:02):
I'm there too.
Haley Radke (47:04):
Okay, great.
Come on to Instagram people.
Wonderful.
What a delight to get to know you today.
Thank you so much for sharing with us.
It's just been a real pleasure.
Alexandra Mann (47:15):
Thank you.
Haley Radke (47:19):
Okay, friend.
Here's your chance.
If you wanted to hang out in New YorkCity, please come hang out with me.
I am gonna attend the Adoptee Film Fest.
My plan is to be there on Thursday,November 6th, 2025, and our good friend
(47:42):
Sullivan Summer here at Adoptees On mostfolks will know her from her multiple
appearances on our Adoptees On Patreon.
She's also been on the main feed show.
You can scroll back andlisten to her episode.
We'll link it in the show notes.
Sullivan is my, one of my best friendsand she is going to be having a reading
(48:05):
and chapbook launch party on November8th, 2025, which I'm so excited to be
attending and cheering her on with that.
And we just have such an excitingweek planned so you have time.
We wanted to make sure you had thisepisode early so you can make your
travel plans and come hang out with us.
(48:28):
We would love to get to meet you inperson and support Alexandra and support
Sullivan in their adoptee endeavors.
So please come to New York.
We would love to have you ifyou're not able to make sure
you stream the film fest.
Or go in person on another night in LA orin New York, because the more we support
(48:53):
events like this, the more they are ableto be successful and grow and get adoptee
voices out into the broader culture.
So please support their initiatives.
Thank you so much for listening toadoptee voices and prioritizing them.
And I really appreciate you taking thetime to spend with us in your earbuds.
(49:16):
Thanks for listening.
Let's talk again very soon.
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