Keep Your Eye on the Prize

I finally became a British citizen after years of putting it off – not because I didn’t qualify, but because perfectionism kept slowing me down. 

In this episode, I share the real reason I delayed, what happened when I shifted my focus from “perfect” to “done,” and revisit how the concept of maximizers vs. satisficers can help you move forward in your life.

Read the article (and come say hi on Substack).

***

I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.

As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.

If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.

Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot? 

I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.

Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
What is it that you really want?
It is so easy to get lost inour to-do lists and take our
eyes off the prize.
For example, your goal might beto move abroad, but then you
get so lost in finding theperfect suitcase that it
prevents you from moving forward.
And here is a personal story todemonstrate this forward.

(00:27):
And here is a personal story todemonstrate this.
I became a British citizen inJanuary, and this is something
that I was eligible for yearsago.
What held me back were therequirements that felt really
onerous to me.
I had to log every trip in andout of the UK for the last five
years and, as somebody whotravels a lot, that just felt
really overwhelming.
Get biometrics done, getletters of reference, pay a fee.

(00:51):
So logging my whereabouts was abig mental blocker for me, and
so was the test that I had totake the life in the UK test.
I heard British people say oh,I heard it was really hard.
I'm sure that I could neverpass it.
So in my mind, this test was amassive obstacle and it was

(01:13):
going to take me months to studyand I wanted to ace it, and I
was just putting it off for theperfect time and the perfect
conditions.
But then I realized my prioritygoal wasn't to score perfectly
on an exam.
It was to become a citizen ofthe country I'd been living in
for almost 15 years.
So, after many years of delayof putting off citizenship, I

(01:38):
chose an exam date only threeweeks into the future and then I
just started cramming my bunsoff.
I had less than a month toremember facts such as Bobby
Moore being captain for Englandwhen it won the World Cup in
1966.
I took 40 online practice testsand I noted all the areas that
were unfamiliar to me.
I created little stories tohelp dates and names stick in my

(02:01):
temporary memory.
For example, the first BritishPrime Minister was Sir Robert
Walpole.
So in my temporary memory, forexample, the first British prime
minister was Sir Robert Walpole.
So in my mind I was sayingeverybody dance around the
Walpole.
We finally have our first primeminister in Westminster.
And then on the morning of theexam, I ate a veggie crepe,
walked into the testing center,handed over my phone, underwent

(02:22):
an unusually thorough bodysearch to make sure I wasn't
hiding any notes and maybethat's a story for another time
and I passed the Life in the UKtest when I moved past the
distraction of feeling like Ihad to score 100 on this test
and clarified what reallymattered citizenship.
Everything moved forward and Ihad my UK passport in a matter

(02:46):
of months.
Where in life might you beobsessing over the minor goal
and losing track of the majorgoal?
It is so easy to get caught upin this, and I see this a lot in
my perfectionist clients, whofind themselves procrastinating,
unable to move forward untileverything is perfect in their

(03:06):
minds, but of course, that timenever comes.
The thing is, we can't improveon our ideas, on our businesses,
on our dance moves literallyanything unless we take action
toward our primary goal.
We have to actually take afirst step before we can refine
what we're doing, and as I wasreflecting on this, I remembered

(03:29):
that I did a podcast episodeyears ago on getting over
perfectionism, making decisions,taking action, and I'm going to
play some of that for you now.
Launching this course has beenmy dream for a while, and
setting this up just took a lotlonger than I was expecting, and

(03:50):
I realize now that this ismostly because I was approaching
my business with a maximizermindset.
Right now I'm reading 168 Hoursby Laura Vander Kim, and in it
she talks about the differencebetween maximizers and
satisfizers.
Maximizers want the best ofeverything and the satisfizers

(04:15):
actually make decisions.
They give themselves a fewminutes to make a choice and
then they go with it, whilemaximizers will spend weeks
agonizing over what's the bestemail service provider, what's
the best website host.
And even when we know our stuff, we'll go back and research it
again and again for hoursbecause we want everything to be

(04:37):
perfect.
But striving for perfection isnever satisfying because it
doesn't lead us anywhere.
We just keep spinning ourwheels instead of moving forward
.
So in life, I aim to becomebetter at making quick decisions
instead of overanalyzingeverything.

(04:58):
Another realization that I hadis we're never going to be 100%
ready to start something big.
Anything worth doing is goingto work us up a bit and just
make us nervous, and we justhave to be okay with that and
jump in even when we're stillscared.
I kept setting launch dates formy course, but then I would let
them slip because I didn't feelready.

(05:18):
There was so much more to do,and I almost did that this time,
but I stopped myself because Imade a public announcement that
I was launching podcast LaunchAcademy on November 19th.
I said it out loud to otherpeople that accountability has
to other people.
That accountability has, youknow, made this the most

(05:39):
productive week I've had allyear.
So I have a specific deadline,certain things need to happen
and they're happening.
When we don't give ourselvesthese real time limits for
projects, big or small, we justlet time expand in, we get, we
assign ourselves all of theseextra tasks and research.
That would be great if we had athousand years to do all of

(06:00):
this stuff, but we don't.
Maximizers are so guilty ofthis and that's what leads us to
have those gross feelings atthe end of a Saturday when we
feel like we spent all dayworking on a personal project
but then we've got nothing toshow for it.
We're like, oh my gosh, whatdid I even do?
Today, I feel like I've beenworking all day and there's

(06:21):
nothing.
There's nothing to show for it,and that's because we fell into
this perfectionist researchspin and I'm pretty laid back.
I used to think I was laid backwith everything, but I realized
in recent years that I actuallyam a perfectionist in certain
things, that the things that Ireally care about.
But it's not serving me to bethis obsessive about things, and

(06:45):
that's why I'm starting mypodcasting course.
That was so fun to hear youngerme riffing on perfectionism and
feeling ready and movingforward.
What a beautiful reminder tomyself and hopefully to you as
well.
So thank you, younger me.
One thing that can really pullus off course is avoiding

(07:07):
discomfort, or trying to avoiddiscomfort.
This shows up in so many partsof our life.
We tinker with small,comfortable things, while
putting off the step thatactually gets us to our goal.
It feels safer to keeppreparing than to risk failing
at the thing we actually want.
For example, are you spendingso much time fine-tuning your

(07:31):
LinkedIn profile that you neversend the email that could
actually open the next door foryou?
Or maybe, like me, you'reaiming for the perfect score on
something when good enough wouldget you exactly where you want
to go and a lot faster.
When we pour all of our energyinto these smaller, safer goals,

(07:53):
the easier it is to lose sightof what really matters.
I'm not saying you shouldn'thave small goals.
You absolutely should.
It's good to have milestones.
That is very helpful.
It's when we get stuck in themand we can't move forward.
We can't make any decisions.
The moment you name what reallymatters and start moving toward

(08:16):
it.
Everything else gets simplerand progress finally happens.
Thank you so much for listeningto this episode.
I'm Sarah Mikatel and it hasbeen my pleasure to connect with
you today and, in case youdidn't know, I have a sub stack
up and running, so if you wantto contact me, get in a little

(08:37):
dialogue about what you heardtoday.
That would be great to hearfrom you.
I'll share a link to that inthe episode notes.
That's all for now.
Have a beautiful week, whereveryou are.