Surviving the Dating Minefield: No B.S. Strategies for Finding Love

Alright, ladies and our 3 guys out there! buckle up for another episode of the Dear Midlife podcast, where we spill the tea, serve the truth, and keep it realer than reality TV with our guest today, dating coach extraordinaire, Anwar White. Trinity stumbled on Anwar when her sister (shout out to Tanya) shared one of his Tik Tok videos and she was hooked on this man who is a knower and "truth sayer" on all the dating BS...which has been a real struggle for both of us in the years since our divorces 7 and 8 years ago.

We are both pretty sure we lost count of how many frogs we've kissed over the years a LOOOONNNGG time ago and BOTH of us are so ready to settle down and find a lasting and LOVING relationship and ya'll know us! Here in our little corner of the internet, we do not do small talk—we do straight talk. And today, Anwar is about to drop some major truth bombs.

Anwar's got the inside scoop on all things love, relationships, and dating disasters. And let me tell you, he's not holding back! Anwar is your fairy god brother and he's all about that unapologetic truth-telling and keeping it real, whether you like it or not.

THAT is the BEST part about Anwar's advice! He has over 13 years of experience as a dating coach. He's got so many success stories and experiences to share. And let's be real ourselves for a sec—ain't nobody got time for sugar-coated advice. We want the raw, unfiltered truth, and that's exactly what Anwar brings to the table.

So, grab your notebooks, folks, because Anwar's about to school us on the dos and don'ts of dating in the modern world. Get ready to laugh, cringe, and maybe even shed a tear or two. It's about to get real up in here!

In today's episode, Anwar teaches us: 

1. Physical chemistry deteriorates after 18 months. Prioritize the items that spell compatibility for you in a lasting partnership instead of seeking a relationship in which physical attributes are the priority.

2. You can identify your needs (vs. wants) by exploring the things that you wanted from your parents as a child but did not receive. These are different for everyone but can include things like, attention, affection, being. cherished, encouraging your talents....think about what are these things for you?

3. When using dating apps, swipe right if you'd rate the match at a 5 on looks. Chances are, once you get to know the individual, they my rate higher based on their personal qualities and characteristics. When you swipe right on the 9s/10s, these men have 100s of people just like you in queue. You'll get lost in the shuffle.

4. Most guys are not going to have great communication skills. Use the 80/20 rule...for every 5 guys you engage with, 4 of them will not have a strong ability to communicate and ask questions.

5. YOU set the tone for the pace and the emotional depth for all of your relationships and courtships. You being your true authentic self, is one of your best dating strategies.

To find more of Anwar:

Instagram | @getyourguy_coaching

TikTok | @datingcoachanwar

And if you are about getting real, honest advice and actionable tips about how to level up life in the middle, go to our website dearmidlife.com and sign up for one of our communities! There we offer learning and support to topics such as building relationships, leveling up your career, gaining control of your health and hormones and so much more. AND...Tomorrow night, we are hosting our VERY FIRS