September 29, 2025 • 10 mins
Ever felt like you’re totally nailing your budget, then BAM, you overspend and that inner critic starts yelling? Yeah, I’ve been there too. Today, we’re diving into why that happens and how to shake off the shame that comes with it. Spoiler alert: perfection isn't the goal; it's all about grace and progress. We’ll chat about how to get back up after a slip-up and keep moving forward, because hey, every stumble is just part of the journey. So, grab your favorite drink, kick back, and let’s break that cycle of financial shame together in this episode: How Can I Practice Grace When My Financial Habits Aren’t Perfect?
Check the full podcast episode here
Ever feel like you're crushing it with your finances one minute, then boom, you're knee-deep in overspending the next? Yeah, I've been there too. One listener hit me up with a question that totally resonated: she starts off strong, budget in hand, tracking every dollar like a hawk, but then, like a bad episode of a reality show, she slips up. And just like that, the inner critic pops up, yelling, 'You failed!' and 'Why even bother?' Let’s face it, almost 80% of folks throw in the towel after just one mistake. It’s wild! But here’s the kicker: it’s not about perfection, my friend. It’s about grace and progress. When we accept that we’re on a journey, not a test, we can shake off that shame and keep moving forward. So, if you’re feeling stuck, remember: mistakes are just part of the ride, and they don't define your financial story. Let’s embrace that grace and keep hustling!
Takeaways:
- Many folks quit their financial plans after just one slip-up, like it's a game over.
- Perfection isn't the goal in managing money; it's all about that sweet, sweet progress.
- Don't let financial shame hold you back; grace is there to lift you up when you fall.
- Your financial journey is not a test; it's a wild ride, so buckle up and enjoy!
- It's super common to feel overwhelmed and want to quit when things get tough, but don't.
- Remember, grace isn't an excuse to quit, it's the fuel that keeps you going forward.
Links referenced in this episode:
WATCH NOW ON YOUTUBE (OUR VIDEO VERSION)
WATCH NOW ON RUMBLE (OUR VIDEO VERSION)
Please share our Podcast with all your friends and family!
Submit your questions or ideas for future shows - email us at
ralph@askralph.com or leave a voicemail message on our podcast page
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
I got a great question from alistener the other day. She said,
Ralph, I start strong with mymoney. I do my budgeting, I do my
saving. I track every singledollar. But then I slip, I overspend,
I forget to track. And thenthat inner critic seems to scream,
you failed. You're just notgood with the money. Why do I even
bother? Friend, let me tellyou right now, if you felt like that
(00:21):
too. I tell you what I know. Ihave many times, more times than
I want to even count. Andhere's a crazy part. Do you know
this? Studies show that nearly80% of people quit their financial
plan after just one mistake.Just give it up. One mistake. 80%
say, I'm done with this. It'snot because the plan doesn't work.
Sometimes it's not about theplan at all. It's because that shame
(00:43):
convinces them that theyfailed. But here's the truth. Perfection
isn't the goal. It never wasthe goal. Grace is the real power
and it's the real source forprogress. And let's talk about that
on today's show. This isFinancially Confident Christian,
your daily dose of gospel,grounded insight and faith driven
tips to help you break thecycle of financial shame with confidence.
(01:07):
Hey there. Welcome back toFinancially Confident Christian.
I'm Ralph, and this is theshow every day where I help you become
a financially confidentChristian. And what a great question
to start the show today. Andif you're like me, you're listening
right now. Maybe you'rewatching on YouTube. You said, Ralph,
I've blown my budget before.Listen, I've swiped that card and
thought, why did I just dothat? And I know that shame firsthand.
(01:29):
But the other side of it is Iknow that God doesn't leave us in
that shame. That's one of thebeautiful things about this show.
It's not just about leavingyou out there in that shame. It's
all about breaking that cycleof financial shame and doing it with
confidence. And if we have Godon our side, who can ever stand against
us? But God invites us intograce. And that grace changes everything.
(01:49):
I'll tell you what. I. I had aclient once. He tracked every single
penny that she spent. I'mtalking list and spreadsheets. She
used stuff. I did all of thosethings. I mean, she had her stuff
down to the penny until onemonth she slipped. And I'll never
forget it, she called me oneday, she says, ralph, I missed a
bill. And then all of asudden, she overspent on her groceries.
(02:10):
Instead of getting back in,starting over again. She just quit.
She said, I remember, I'llnever get this phone call. She said,
Ralph, if I can't do itperfectly, why do I even try? You
might be listening right now.You thinking, Ralph, I feel the exact
same way. Listen, to be honestwith you, I felt that way many times.
You have a setback. Andlisten, we're all going to have setbacks.
It's part of life. You have asetback. If I can't do this perfectly,
(02:33):
I'm just giving up. Does thatsound familiar to you? So when I
sat down and I work with her,and this is the real lesson for today,
what we had to do was we hadto shift that thinking. So many people
think it's about perfection.Listen, I'm a perfectionist. I thought
it was about perfection forthe longest time, but it's not about
perfection. Perfection willmake you crazy. He'll make you say,
(02:54):
Ralph, I'm not doing thisanymore. I give up. It's not about
giving up. It's aboutprogress. And with that progress
comes something beautiful fromscripture, and that's grace. Because
that's what really works.That's what really solves these problems.
So one of the first things Ireally want you to hear today, if
you're listening right now,this is one of the things you can
write down. Your financiallife is a journey. It's not a test.
(03:14):
So many people think they'rein this test, this pass or fail test.
God is going to give me atest, and if I fail, I'm done, pack
my bags, I'm done. It's notgoing to work. But your financial
life is a journey. I want youto hear that today because so many
people are struggling rightnow. You might be struggling right
now. You might be a Ralph. Itseems like every time I start to
work at this, I build thatbudget, I build that intentional
(03:36):
spending plan, I start tosave, I build that emergency fund.
Then way more somethinghappens. I feel like God's testing
me. And a lot of people feelthat way. It's their own self talk.
So let me let you know alittle secret. God isn't waiting
for you to fail. He's not.He's not on the sideline going, well,
I sure hope we're out failstoday. It's not at all what he wants
from us. He's walking rightthere alongside with you. He's helping
(03:59):
you. You just have to reachout to him and say, lord, I need
your help. Well, let's getright into scripture today. You know,
I always like to talk aboutScripture in the show. I'm going
to get right to SecondCorinthians, chapter 12, verse 9.
It says this beautifulscripture. It says, but he said to
my grace is sufficient foryou, for my power is made perfect
in weakness. Therefore, I willboast all the more gladly about my
(04:21):
weaknesses so that Christ'spower may rest on me. What a powerful
piece of scripture. My graceis sufficient for you. That's what
the Lord is calling you totoday. If you're struggling in your
finances, if you feel like,why do I even try? I keep on falling
behind. Just remember that.Write that down on your heart. Write
that down where you can seeit. My grace is sufficient for you
(04:41):
because my power is madeperfect in your weakness. The Lord
is saying to you, you're weak.He's not saying that to criticize
you. He's not saying thatbecause he's testing you or want
you to fail. He's saying toyou, my power makes your weakness
work. It makes it perfect. Andsee, that's where the grace steps
in, where shame used to rule.If you're living in this financial
cycle of shame, I'm going totell you right now, you don't have
(05:03):
to live that way anymore.Grace can overtake that. And another
thing I want you to heartoday. Mistakes aren't the end of
the story. They're just not.They're part of the learning process.
I cannot tell you how manytimes I've made mistakes. Financially,
maybe. Saying that's kind ofcrazy. Yes. I've been doing this
for 30 years. I have advanceddegrees in accounting and finance
(05:23):
and money. And guess what? Imake mistakes. And I make them routinely.
My wife is constantlyreminding me, ralph, you made a mistake.
You might be feeling the sameway. You make mistakes as well. But
you need to hear this rightnow. Mistakes aren't the end. They're
all part of the process.They're all part of that journey.
What really matters. Whatreally matters is you get back up.
Which leads me to thisbeautiful piece of scripture as well.
(05:45):
This is from Proverbs, chapter24, verse 16. The righteous may fall
seven times, but still get up.But the wicked will stumble into
trouble. See, falling isn'tfailing so many people. I fall down.
I skin my teeth. When I was akid, I remember stubbing my toe.
That's the worst possiblething. You watched every single step
after that, didn't you? Butwhat did you do? You got back up.
(06:07):
I remember my dad teaching mehow to ride a bike right on the sidewalk.
He says, son, you can do this.He grabs a hold of the back of that
scene, kind of pushes mealong, and I know, well, he was intending
that I was going to fall. Andguess what I did about three feet
later, home, down on thesidewalk, you know, scraped that
arm up, did a good job on it.But dad was right there and he said,
all right, let's try thisagain. Your finances are the same
(06:28):
way. When you fall, it's notfailing. But if you stay down, if
you stay in that cycle ofshame and that self talk, then you
won't move forward. Accept thegrace that God has given you. Because
God is calling us to progress.He's not calling us to perfection.
He's calling us for progress.He's calling us to do a little bit
better than we did yesterday.He's not looking for perfection.
(06:51):
If you're looking forperfection, I've said this on this
show many times, you're nevergoing to find perfection. Listen
to this book of scripture frommy favorite book of the Bible, Romans,
chapter 8, verse 1. Therefore,there is no condemnation for those
who are in Christ Jesus. Andthat is so profitable today. When
you belong to him, when youtruly belong to Christ, that shame
that you used to feel, thatshame that you used to endure, it's
(07:14):
got no power over yourfinancial story either. Yes, I'm
going to connect the dots.Christ doesn't want you to fail at
your finances. He wants you tobe successful in it. Because when
you are successful, I say thisall the time on this show, you will
never truly bless somebodyelse till you get your own house
in order. So guess what?Christ wants you to get your house
in order to. But you've got tohave grace to understand that you
(07:34):
are going to fail sometimes.You are going to fall down, you are
going to run that bike rightinto the sidewalk. That happens.
That's part of the journey,that's part of life. But the question
is, do you get back up andsay, Lord, your grace is sufficient
for me. So I want you to hearthis right now. Grace is not an excuse
to quit. You can't just stop.But grace is the reason that you
keep going. Because everystumble is a chance to lean on him.
(07:57):
And what did he promise in thescriptures? His grace is enough.
And if this hits home for youtoday, I want to give you a special
resources, something that I'vebeen working on for the last few
months. It's my third book.It's called How to Become a Financially
Confident Christian. And it'syours absolutely free. You just go
to my website. That'sFinanciallyConfidentChristian.com/becoming again.
That'sFinanciallyconfidentChristian.com/becoming. How
(08:21):
about we pray together now?Lord, we come to you right now. We
just thank You for your grace,Lord, an abundant grace that we have
no ability to even understand.And Lord, we have to admit that we
stumble with our money. Yes,we overspend. Yes, we forget. And
Lord, oftentimes we feel thatshame poured down upon us. But Lord,
You remind us of something sobeautiful. That is your grace is
(08:42):
enough. So, Lord, I just askYou to listen and help my friend
who's listening today work onletting go of that feeling of perfection.
Lord, help them to stand upafter mistakes. And, Lord, help them
to walk in your freedom. Andwe ask this in the name of Jesus.
Amen. Friend, Remember this.You don't have to be perfect with
money. I think it's soimportant. I'm going to say that
(09:03):
again. You don't have to beperfect with money. You just need
to keep walking in grace. Now,tomorrow's show, we're going to continue
this journey together. We'regoing to talk about building momentum
and we're going to ask thebig, hairy, audacious question, what
comes next? So make sure youjoin me on tomorrow's show. And if
today's shows encourage you,I'm going to encourage you to do
something for me. Why don'tyou share with somebody who feels
(09:24):
stuck in that shame? You mightknow somebody who's really stuck
right now. They're like,you're thinking to yourself, ralph,
I know that person. I'm goingto go, I'm going to send them a text.
I'm going to send them anemail because they're stuck in this.
Just send them to our website.That's FinanciallyConfidentChristian.com
Again, that'sFinanciallyConfidentChristian.com and
hey, if you've got a questionfor the show, it's real simple. Go
to justaskralph.com and sendyour question in. And chances are
(09:47):
it'll be features on thisshow. And remember, this is the show
with no financial shame. So goout there and be a financially confident
Christian. I have confidencein you. Have confidence in yourself.
Stay financially savvy. Godbless you, and you have a great day
today.
I got a great question from alistener the other day. She said,
Ralph, I start strong with mymoney. I do my budgeting, I do my
saving. I track every singledollar. But then I slip, I overspend,
I forget to track. And thenthat inner critic seems to scream,
you failed. You're just notgood with the money. Why do I even
bother? Friend, let me tellyou right now, if you felt like that
(00:21):
too. I tell you what I know. Ihave many times, more times than
I want to even count. Andhere's a crazy part. Do you know
this? Studies show that nearly80% of people quit their financial
plan after just one mistake.Just give it up. One mistake. 80%
say, I'm done with this. It'snot because the plan doesn't work.
Sometimes it's not about theplan at all. It's because that shame
(00:43):
convinces them that theyfailed. But here's the truth. Perfection
isn't the goal. It never wasthe goal. Grace is the real power
and it's the real source forprogress. And let's talk about that
on today's show. This isFinancially Confident Christian,
your daily dose of gospel,grounded insight and faith driven
tips to help you break thecycle of financial shame with confidence.
(01:07):
Hey there. Welcome back toFinancially Confident Christian.
I'm Ralph, and this is theshow every day where I help you become
a financially confidentChristian. And what a great question
to start the show today. Andif you're like me, you're listening
right now. Maybe you'rewatching on YouTube. You said, Ralph,
I've blown my budget before.Listen, I've swiped that card and
thought, why did I just dothat? And I know that shame firsthand.
(01:29):
But the other side of it is Iknow that God doesn't leave us in
that shame. That's one of thebeautiful things about this show.
It's not just about leavingyou out there in that shame. It's
all about breaking that cycleof financial shame and doing it with
confidence. And if we have Godon our side, who can ever stand against
us? But God invites us intograce. And that grace changes everything.
(01:49):
I'll tell you what. I. I had aclient once. He tracked every single
penny that she spent. I'mtalking list and spreadsheets. She
used stuff. I did all of thosethings. I mean, she had her stuff
down to the penny until onemonth she slipped. And I'll never
forget it, she called me oneday, she says, ralph, I missed a
bill. And then all of asudden, she overspent on her groceries.
(02:10):
Instead of getting back in,starting over again. She just quit.
She said, I remember, I'llnever get this phone call. She said,
Ralph, if I can't do itperfectly, why do I even try? You
might be listening right now.You thinking, Ralph, I feel the exact
same way. Listen, to be honestwith you, I felt that way many times.
You have a setback. Andlisten, we're all going to have setbacks.
It's part of life. You have asetback. If I can't do this perfectly,
(02:33):
I'm just giving up. Does thatsound familiar to you? So when I
sat down and I work with her,and this is the real lesson for today,
what we had to do was we hadto shift that thinking. So many people
think it's about perfection.Listen, I'm a perfectionist. I thought
it was about perfection forthe longest time, but it's not about
perfection. Perfection willmake you crazy. He'll make you say,
(02:54):
Ralph, I'm not doing thisanymore. I give up. It's not about
giving up. It's aboutprogress. And with that progress
comes something beautiful fromscripture, and that's grace. Because
that's what really works.That's what really solves these problems.
So one of the first things Ireally want you to hear today, if
you're listening right now,this is one of the things you can
write down. Your financiallife is a journey. It's not a test.
(03:14):
So many people think they'rein this test, this pass or fail test.
God is going to give me atest, and if I fail, I'm done, pack
my bags, I'm done. It's notgoing to work. But your financial
life is a journey. I want youto hear that today because so many
people are struggling rightnow. You might be struggling right
now. You might be a Ralph. Itseems like every time I start to
work at this, I build thatbudget, I build that intentional
(03:36):
spending plan, I start tosave, I build that emergency fund.
Then way more somethinghappens. I feel like God's testing
me. And a lot of people feelthat way. It's their own self talk.
So let me let you know alittle secret. God isn't waiting
for you to fail. He's not.He's not on the sideline going, well,
I sure hope we're out failstoday. It's not at all what he wants
from us. He's walking rightthere alongside with you. He's helping
(03:59):
you. You just have to reachout to him and say, lord, I need
your help. Well, let's getright into scripture today. You know,
I always like to talk aboutScripture in the show. I'm going
to get right to SecondCorinthians, chapter 12, verse 9.
It says this beautifulscripture. It says, but he said to
my grace is sufficient foryou, for my power is made perfect
in weakness. Therefore, I willboast all the more gladly about my
(04:21):
weaknesses so that Christ'spower may rest on me. What a powerful
piece of scripture. My graceis sufficient for you. That's what
the Lord is calling you totoday. If you're struggling in your
finances, if you feel like,why do I even try? I keep on falling
behind. Just remember that.Write that down on your heart. Write
that down where you can seeit. My grace is sufficient for you
(04:41):
because my power is madeperfect in your weakness. The Lord
is saying to you, you're weak.He's not saying that to criticize
you. He's not saying thatbecause he's testing you or want
you to fail. He's saying toyou, my power makes your weakness
work. It makes it perfect. Andsee, that's where the grace steps
in, where shame used to rule.If you're living in this financial
cycle of shame, I'm going totell you right now, you don't have
(05:03):
to live that way anymore.Grace can overtake that. And another
thing I want you to heartoday. Mistakes aren't the end of
the story. They're just not.They're part of the learning process.
I cannot tell you how manytimes I've made mistakes. Financially,
maybe. Saying that's kind ofcrazy. Yes. I've been doing this
for 30 years. I have advanceddegrees in accounting and finance
(05:23):
and money. And guess what? Imake mistakes. And I make them routinely.
My wife is constantlyreminding me, ralph, you made a mistake.
You might be feeling the sameway. You make mistakes as well. But
you need to hear this rightnow. Mistakes aren't the end. They're
all part of the process.They're all part of that journey.
What really matters. Whatreally matters is you get back up.
Which leads me to thisbeautiful piece of scripture as well.
(05:45):
This is from Proverbs, chapter24, verse 16. The righteous may fall
seven times, but still get up.But the wicked will stumble into
trouble. See, falling isn'tfailing so many people. I fall down.
I skin my teeth. When I was akid, I remember stubbing my toe.
That's the worst possiblething. You watched every single step
after that, didn't you? Butwhat did you do? You got back up.
(06:07):
I remember my dad teaching mehow to ride a bike right on the sidewalk.
He says, son, you can do this.He grabs a hold of the back of that
scene, kind of pushes mealong, and I know, well, he was intending
that I was going to fall. Andguess what I did about three feet
later, home, down on thesidewalk, you know, scraped that
arm up, did a good job on it.But dad was right there and he said,
all right, let's try thisagain. Your finances are the same
(06:28):
way. When you fall, it's notfailing. But if you stay down, if
you stay in that cycle ofshame and that self talk, then you
won't move forward. Accept thegrace that God has given you. Because
God is calling us to progress.He's not calling us to perfection.
He's calling us for progress.He's calling us to do a little bit
better than we did yesterday.He's not looking for perfection.
(06:51):
If you're looking forperfection, I've said this on this
show many times, you're nevergoing to find perfection. Listen
to this book of scripture frommy favorite book of the Bible, Romans,
chapter 8, verse 1. Therefore,there is no condemnation for those
who are in Christ Jesus. Andthat is so profitable today. When
you belong to him, when youtruly belong to Christ, that shame
that you used to feel, thatshame that you used to endure, it's
(07:14):
got no power over yourfinancial story either. Yes, I'm
going to connect the dots.Christ doesn't want you to fail at
your finances. He wants you tobe successful in it. Because when
you are successful, I say thisall the time on this show, you will
never truly bless somebodyelse till you get your own house
in order. So guess what?Christ wants you to get your house
in order to. But you've got tohave grace to understand that you
(07:34):
are going to fail sometimes.You are going to fall down, you are
going to run that bike rightinto the sidewalk. That happens.
That's part of the journey,that's part of life. But the question
is, do you get back up andsay, Lord, your grace is sufficient
for me. So I want you to hearthis right now. Grace is not an excuse
to quit. You can't just stop.But grace is the reason that you
keep going. Because everystumble is a chance to lean on him.
(07:57):
And what did he promise in thescriptures? His grace is enough.
And if this hits home for youtoday, I want to give you a special
resources, something that I'vebeen working on for the last few
months. It's my third book.It's called How to Become a Financially
Confident Christian. And it'syours absolutely free. You just go
to my website. That'sFinanciallyConfidentChristian.com/becoming again.
That'sFinanciallyconfidentChristian.com/becoming. How
(08:21):
about we pray together now?Lord, we come to you right now. We
just thank You for your grace,Lord, an abundant grace that we have
no ability to even understand.And Lord, we have to admit that we
stumble with our money. Yes,we overspend. Yes, we forget. And
Lord, oftentimes we feel thatshame poured down upon us. But Lord,
You remind us of something sobeautiful. That is your grace is
(08:42):
enough. So, Lord, I just askYou to listen and help my friend
who's listening today work onletting go of that feeling of perfection.
Lord, help them to stand upafter mistakes. And, Lord, help them
to walk in your freedom. Andwe ask this in the name of Jesus.
Amen. Friend, Remember this.You don't have to be perfect with
money. I think it's soimportant. I'm going to say that
(09:03):
again. You don't have to beperfect with money. You just need
to keep walking in grace. Now,tomorrow's show, we're going to continue
this journey together. We'regoing to talk about building momentum
and we're going to ask thebig, hairy, audacious question, what
comes next? So make sure youjoin me on tomorrow's show. And if
today's shows encourage you,I'm going to encourage you to do
something for me. Why don'tyou share with somebody who feels
(09:24):
stuck in that shame? You mightknow somebody who's really stuck
right now. They're like,you're thinking to yourself, ralph,
I know that person. I'm goingto go, I'm going to send them a text.
I'm going to send them anemail because they're stuck in this.
Just send them to our website.That's FinanciallyConfidentChristian.com
Again, that'sFinanciallyConfidentChristian.com and
hey, if you've got a questionfor the show, it's real simple. Go
to justaskralph.com and sendyour question in. And chances are
(09:47):
it'll be features on thisshow. And remember, this is the show
with no financial shame. So goout there and be a financially confident
Christian. I have confidencein you. Have confidence in yourself.
Stay financially savvy. Godbless you, and you have a great day
today.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
CrimeLess: Hillbilly Heist
It’s 1996 in rural North Carolina, and an oddball crew makes history when they pull off America’s third largest cash heist. But it’s all downhill from there. Join host Johnny Knoxville as he unspools a wild and woolly tale about a group of regular ‘ol folks who risked it all for a chance at a better life. CrimeLess: Hillbilly Heist answers the question: what would you do with 17.3 million dollars? The answer includes diamond rings, mansions, velvet Elvis paintings, plus a run for the border, murder-for-hire-plots, and FBI busts.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com