Jealous or Grateful this Christmas?

Comparison is the thief of joy, and today we're diving deep into why that’s the case, especially as we roll into the holiday season. Jealous or Grateful this Christmas? We’re chatting about how scrolling through social media can make us feel like we’re always coming up short compared to everyone else’s highlight reel. Our listener asks a killer question about staying content without feeling like they’re falling behind, and trust me, we’ve all been there! I’ll share some personal stories and practical tips to help you chill out and focus on what really matters, like gratitude and contentment. So, kick back, relax, and let’s tackle this comparison game together!

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Comparison can really kill your vibe, especially during the holiday season when everyone seems to be living their best life. Ralph kicks things off with a quote from Pastor Steven Furtick that hits home: we struggle with insecurity because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else's highlight reel. Ain't that the truth? It’s super easy to scroll through social media and feel like everyone is doing better than us, but Ralph reminds us that what we see is just the tip of the iceberg. The real deal? Everyone has their struggles, debts, and stressors that they don’t post about. He shares a personal story about a Christmas where he was feeling down after scrolling through others’ holiday pics, only to be brought back to reality by his wife’s wise words about the unseen struggles behind those shiny decorations. So, the big takeaway? Focus on your blessings and stop comparing your life to someone else's highlight reel. Gratitude, my friends, is where it’s at!

Takeaways:

• Comparison kills gratitude, and when you look sideways, you stop looking upward.
• Social media shows everyone's highlight reel, but it hides their financial struggles and stress.
• Practicing gratitude can help you appreciate what you have and combat feelings of jealousy.
• The secret to contentment is recognizing what you have instead of craving what others show off.
• Taking a break from social media can help you focus on your blessings instead of comparing yourself to others.
• Joy isn't about having more stuff; it's about seeing and appreciating what you already possess.

Links referenced in this episode:

• financiallyconfidentchristian.com/review

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Episode Transcript

(00:28):
Hey, I thought I'd starttoday's show with a quote from Pastor
Steven Furtick. He's thepastor of Elevation Church. You might
have seen him online. Reallypassionate pastor. But he said this.
He said the reason we strugglewith insecurity is because we compare
our behind the scenes witheveryone else's highlight reel. I'll
tell you what, Stephen, homerun on that one. Dude, I agree with
you 100%. Which leads me totoday's listener question. Ralph,

(00:50):
I love seeing family andfriends during the holidays, but
it's hard not to compare whatI have to what others do. And here's
the big part of theirquestion, Ralph. How can I stay content
and not feel like I'm fallingbehind? What a great question today.
And here's where I want tostart. That, with comparison steals
the joy that God meant foryou. I want you to hear that. I want

(01:10):
you to embrace that right now.Because the moment you measure your
blessing against someoneelse's, you're forgetting something
big. You're forgetting whogave them to you in the first place.
So let's talk about stayingcontent during the holidays. On today's
show. This is FinanciallyConfident Christian, your daily dose
of gospel, grounded insightand faith driven tips to help you

(01:31):
break the cycle of financialshame with confidence. Welcome to
the show. I'm Ralph. I'm sohappy you chose to join me today
as we continue our series offinding joy without going broke during
the holiday season. My goalevery day on the show, and I hope
I'm meeting that goal for you,is helping you break that cycle of
financial shame and do it withconfidence. Listen, I've been coaching

(01:54):
families for years more than Iwant to admit. And during that time
I've seen how comparison justcompletely drains gratitude and it
leaves people empty. But I'vealso seen how you can replace that
with peace and it justcompletely removes that pressure.
And listen, I'm faced with thesame temptations that you are. So

(02:15):
easy to look at what othershave. Social media allows us to do
that. I want to get on a rant,but I might a little bit later in
the show. But we're constantlylooking at what other people have.
We forget to thank God forwhat we've already got ready in front
of us. And I'll never forgetone Christmas. I'll never forget
this. It was late in the nightat Christmas time. My wife and I,
we are both worn out. We'rejust sitting on the couch, just kind

(02:36):
of what they call the doomscrolling on our phones. And I'm
looking through Social media.I call it social media, like the
highlight reel. And I'mlooking at, oh, look at Tay dad going
on. Look at these peoplehanging on. And I started having
this feeling like everyoneelse had it better than me. I was
really leaning into that. Iwas like, man, look what they got.
Look at that beautiful newhome. Wow, look at this. They got

(02:57):
family. They're traveling. Mywife said, what is wrong with you?
And she nudged me over to theside and she says she reminded me
of this. She said, ralph,what? You can't see the debt behind
their decorations. And they'lltell you, right? That line stuck
with me because I could seethe decorations, I could see all
the trimmings. I could see allthe beautiful lights on the Christmas

(03:17):
tree. But what I couldn't seeis the debt behind that, the stress
behind that, the anxietybehind that. And I love what former
President Theodore Rooseveltsaid. He said it best. He said, comparison
is the thief of joy, and ittruly is. So today's question is
this. How do I battlecomparison this Christmas? Man, we
got to understand this. Firstthing I want you to recognize is

(03:39):
comparison kills gratitude.Let's say something bold here. When
you look sideways, you stoplooking upward, and the answer's
upward, isn't it? Becausethankfulness dies when comparison
lives. It's all about thatmindset. Are you looking to the side?
Are you looking upward? Andnow I'm going to get on my. My soapbox

(03:59):
a little bit. Social medialies to us. Social media posts people's
highlight reel. It's like thetop thing. Here's all the great things
that happen. But what itdoesn't post is their hardship. It
doesn't show you when thatcredit card bill comes in January.
It doesn't show you whenthey're still paying that credit
card in June next summer. Itshows you the highlights. Oh, look

(04:20):
at all this fancy stuff. Lookat the cool. The decorations, and
look at the vacation we're on.It's that perfect photo. But what
you're not seeing is that deepstruggle. You're not seeing relationships
that are severed or that arebreaking apart because of financial
stress. And. And here's thesinister part. And I don't want to
rant about social media toolong, but, man, it makes us feel

(04:42):
less than, doesn't it? We lookaround and we're like, oh, man, I
wish I had that. Pay attentionto where your social media is. And
we got to focus on theeternal. See, it's so easy to focus
on those gifts. What's underthe tree, what we Open up. But gifts
are going to fade. You're notgoing to remember gifts years from
now. But what you willremember is relationships, that faith.

(05:04):
That faith will last forever.So focus right now on what really
matters. Well, how do you dothat? One of the ways you can do
that is to practice gratitude.I know I say that on the show all
the time, but listen, I'm atrue believer in this. Write down
five blessings each morning.Listen, before you even get out of
bed, I started to do this.List five things you're grateful

(05:25):
for. Start your day withgratefulness. Because, listen, you
should be grateful. You shouldbe grateful that you have the ability
to get out of bed. Like,you're not in a coma. You're not
suffering some major illness.And maybe you are. Maybe right now
you're in a battle. So many ofus are in battles. But guess what?
You're still loved by thecreator of the world. And he still

(05:46):
got his hands out to grab youand take hold of you. And finally,
we can find joy throughcontentment. See, the more you appreciate
what you have, and I need tosay this to myself sometimes, the
more you appreciate what youhave, the less you crave what you
don't have. Appreciate whatyou have. Let's get to our Bible

(06:06):
verses today. Again. I got twoof them. First, one comes from the
book of Galatians, chapter 6,verse 4. And it says this. Each one
should test their own actions,that they can take pride in themselves
alone without comparingthemselves to someone else. Listen,
what is it saying there'scomparison is a thief of joy. The
Bible saying it to us. Testyour own actions. Take pride in yourselves.

(06:30):
Stop comparing yourself tosomeone else. It's just making you
live in constant anxiety. It'smaking you feel discontented. Listen,
it's not their race thatyou're running. It's your race. Let's
get to our second Bible verse.That's Philippians, chapter 4, verse
12. It says, I know what it isto be in need, and I know what it
is to have plenty. I'velearned the secret of being content

(06:51):
in any and every situation. Iwant to give you a little context
here, because you need tounderstand this. That's Paul writing
that from prison. From prison.He knows what it needs to be in need.
And I know it has that plenty.I've learned the secret of being
content in any and everysituation. Man. That is the secret
sauce to the whole thing. Howabout we pray together? And, Lord,
we come to you right now? Wewant to understand contentment. We

(07:14):
want to be grateful for thethings you've given us, Lord. We
don't want to constantly livein that comparison trap. So, Lord,
I. Help me to stop comparingmy life to other people. Let me understand
that that's their race, andyou've given me a different race,
Lord. Teach me to see theblessings that you've already given
me, all the beautiful,abundant things you've already given
me, Lord, and help me to growmy joy through gratitude and contentment,

(07:34):
not comparison and jealousyand envy. And I ask this in the name
of Jesus. Amen. All right, soyou ready for your one action item
today? I'm going to get backon social media for a second. I want
you to take what I'm going tocall a comparison fast this week.
You're like, what are youtalking about, Ralph? I want you
to skip social media for 24hours, and instead of scrolling,

(07:55):
just sit there and write down10 blessings that you already have.
We'll call it the social mediafast. What we're really doing is
we're leaning into contentmentand we're leaning into gratitude.
And while we're talking aboutgratitude, I want to ask you for
a favor. If this episode, ifthis show has helped you, if you're
learning from it, it would begreat if you could leave a review
for the show. More people willcome to us when they see, oh, Ralph's

(08:17):
talking to people. People areunderstanding, People are growing,
and I've made it super simpleto do that. If you go to financiallyconfidentchristian.com/review,
again, that'sfinanciallyconfidentchristian.com/Review. You
can leave us feedback rightthere because your feedback helps
the message reach more people.And that's what I want to do. I want
to bring more hope. I want tobring more joy and contentment and

(08:39):
gratitude to people. Yourfeedback can help us do that. So
again, it's atfinanciallyconfidentchristian.com/review. I'm
really trying to grow reviews.If you listen to other podcast players,
you can do it there as well.But I would really love it if you
would do that. And here's whatI want you to take away today. Gratitude
and comparison can't live inthe same heart. I'm sorry to tell

(09:00):
you that it can't happen. Youcan't live in both ways. Your heart
will break. And so many of youlistening right now have a broken
heart because you're trying todo that and it doesn't work. And
see, remember this, joy isn'tabout having more. A lot of people
say, well, Ralph, I'd be morejoyous if I had more stuff. It's
about seeing what's alreadyyours. And listen, if you're listening

(09:22):
to me, if you're watching meright now, you have so much. And
peace can begin the moment youstop keeping score. We're not intended
to keep score. I hope thatreached you today. So today, I want
to encourage you to go outthere and be a financially confident
Christian. You have theability to do that. You have a lord
that loves you and he wants tohelp you. He wants you to break that

(09:43):
cycle of financial shame andlive in confidence. So stay financially
savvy. God bless you, and Ihope you have a great day today.