160 - Florida Flashers, Barfly Bussers, Poultry Pelter, and Do-Good Diver - Florida Men

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Morning. Florida Man has been shutinside for way too long, and now
that we're reopening the Sunshine State,shit's starting to hit the fan list.
Her discretion is advised. Coming toyou from America's Wayhing. This is Florida
Man, the podcast for Tuesday,May the twenty six, twenty twenty.

(00:20):
Each week we bring you stories fromthe shady side of the Sunshine State,
starring America's most prolific criminal, FloridaMan, and coming up this weekend,
Episode one sixty, Florida Man triesto enforce politeness at a liquor store.
Florida Man overreacts to spammy email.Florida woman calls nine to one about a
lack of social distancing but refuses todistance herself. And a couple of Florida

(00:43):
men are starving for attention, sothey whip out their sausages. Plus a
Florida Man food fight, filling theblank listener, email and email, and
much much more so. Any anyupdates to your quarantine situation? Phil Well?

(01:03):
Um, the intern made a tripto the liquor store yesterday. So
we were we were on we wereon bare necessities at that point. Um,
Yeah, we were into some goodnow yeah, well we're gonna see
that. I see the bottle ofa CARDI behind you. It's empty.
Um, that was ultrom last weekthe away. I know I ain't got
that far yet. Um, yeah, it's empty. We probably sat off

(01:26):
at the last last two tonight.Um it's been sitting there a week.
Yeah. Oh well no, Iactually was on the floor until yesterday,
and then I put it up onthe table so I wouldn't forget it,
and then I forgot it to putit. The way away recycle comes on
Thursday, so I got I gottwo more days, but luckily first I
finished it off last Tuesday. Youmissed a week, no, no douty
when we recorded last time. Yeah, yeah, it's gone. You had

(01:48):
a Thursday in between now and then. Oh yeah, you're right, I
did miss it. Yeah, okay. Well My update is h my company
has told me that they're not openingour Fort Myer's office back up until at
least mid September, and in midSeptember it is going to be only people
who can't work efficiently from home,which my team is doing pretty damn good

(02:10):
from home. So I probably willnot be going back to the office till
probably closer to the first and nextyear. Well damn yeah, so I'd
working in Pj's for the rest ofthe year. Well, you know what,
that's what I do. I don'treally get dressed until my lunch break
at New Well we are luckily Microsoftteams only shows you. Well, just

(02:34):
like this broadcast here from about themid chest up. So that's the last
thing we need is naked Joel runningaround on a bone on a video feed.
Yeah, that would get that wouldget pulled. We do not want
to see that. No, Idon't even want to see it. I
cover up the mirror when I'm takinga shower, put a towel over it.
You have a mirror in the showerin the bathroom, okay, right

(02:57):
across from the shower. Okay,Well, no, not a whole lot
going on here. It's been aquiet week. I had to go help
a buddy get all this was thisworked out really good. Um somebody he
wants a hot tub for his patio. Okay, so he found one for
two hundred and fifty bucks down inuh down on a stero and uh yeah,
so yeah it'd be fine. Iwon't take us a bit a bitt

(03:17):
I teach you help pick to pickit up, loaded upon to put up
on the trailer. Okay, wego to pick it up and the whole
thing falls apart. The everything iscompletely rotted out, all the wood,
all the frame. We ended uptaking it out piece by piece with uh
and then had to just leave itthere. No, it was like two
hundred fifty bucks good price. Imean, you got all you gotta do,
just redo the frame, the skirtaround there. So that was my

(03:38):
day to day. And then wewe drink a little bit before and then
we sat around and drink a littlebit after and uh. Then here I
am, so hey, okay,and luckily for us, we have uh
we've got an update from mea today. Mia is live on our on our
excuse me, get vocal channel here, and uh we got we got to
see we got to see uh duckBill and duck Joel today. Right now,
I'm looking at a rooster's ass,so that's I'll check and asked,

(04:00):
sorry, Yeah, that's a greatview, and me is there in the
background, is in the background.But yeah, the ducks are Our ducks
are doing great. Apparently duck Pillhas not gotten laid since he's been there.
We're gonna We're gonna work on that. If we hook him up with
something, maybe a little strange couldkeep him keep him going. Hate to
put those go nats to those biggo nats that they yeah, you know,
put him good. They're that big. You gotta you gotta share them,

(04:20):
you know, you gotta make surethat they're being We got some stuff
in the mail too this week,did we? We did. I got
a couple of boxes of sunflower seeds, which obviously are for you, and
some beef jerky which I may ormay not share with you. Um yeah,
but there was no card and nonote, so uh, whoever said

(04:42):
that, thank you? We justdon't know who to thank, but we
appreciate it. The next time I'mup in Fort Myers, I'll drop off
the sunflower seeds to fill yep,I am because I am out zero naa,
I have to hide him, soI'll put him in the gun safe
so the kids can't get them.Okay, that's that's pretty good idea.
Actually never gave him. We don'tgive them combination of the snife so they
can That's a very good thing.That's where I hide all my goodies.

(05:03):
I hide. I hide that Ihad my sunflower seeds, mixed nuts and
uh flaming hot uh free toes especiallyand sometimes flaming hot cheetos if I get
them. Oh, you know whatI like that I've recently discovered. Actually,
this was one of your girls atu at Jeeping with Judd turned me
onto these fuego takies. Yeah,those are good. We get those.

(05:27):
Ever, although I made a mistake. I made a mistake. Um,
just don't go to the bathroom afteryou've been eating those without washing your hands
first. Wash your hands first,right. Uh. However, I made
another mistake, but that's yes,don't do that. Yeah. The mistake
I made was I picked those upon my way to home depot last weekend.
Uh, and I you know,I ate about half the bag.

(05:48):
Uh and then I had to putmy mask on m to go into home
depot. Yeah, it was allright until I had to burp in the
mask. In the mask, I'vedone that, but that was that made
my eyes water. That's nasty,Joel Angle, that's trusting me, I
know. And then you didn't haveto smell it. We got wet.

(06:10):
So apparently we've got Allison sent ussome facts on Rhode Island. She did
she did. Uh, Yet Idid mention that how did we get the
subject of how did we get onthe subject of Rhode Island, because that's
where she was from. And Imentioned that that Rhode Island is smaller than
Collier County, which is the nextcounty south of US here in Florida.

(06:31):
But it's actually half, exactly halfthe size. You could fit two Rhode
Islands into Collier County. Really.But what I thought was even more interesting
once I looked it up, isRhode Island is exactly the same size as
Lee County, the county that welive in. Well, I got a
message this week which was not sharedwith you by one of our patrons.

(06:51):
Just listened to episode one fifty seven. Joel was very inaccurate during his description
of Supernatural just embarrassing. Who sentthat? Uh, I'm sure he was
super incorrect. That whole demon thathold getting a demon out of you thing?
Was that? Who said that?Who do you think who's the only

(07:12):
other patron the Nazima sale number?Oh? Was that Heather? M HMMI
because because uh, yeah, wegot another YouTube comment that basically said the
same thing. Alrighty, so you'regonna read some of these facts from Rhode
Island or were gonna skip on.Uh, well, there was a couple
that I wanted to cover here.Yeah. So, uh, Rhode Island,
like I mentioned, is exactly thesame size as our home county,
Lee County. Um. But it'sso small it can fit into the state

(07:35):
of Texas two hundred and twenty onetimes, in and out, in and
out two hundred and twenty one times. Wow. Wow, I'm not responding
to that. No, that waspretty bad. Fifteen percent of the states
square mileage actually consists of bays anddoesn't even include land, so it's even
smaller. They they they gotta youknow, they gotta include that the wet

(07:56):
spots to uh, to compensate.Actually, we're gonna make one of these
dirty every time. Yeah, yeah, pretty much. The whole state only
needs one area code, and youcan drive across the entire state in an
hour. Rhode Islanders consider any drivelasting more than fifteen minutes a road trip.
And Rhode Island is so small thatthe locals visit Massachusetts for fun.
Nice. You know where Massachusetts peoplego for fun, Fucking Florida in the

(08:20):
winter. All right, you're readyto get started. I suppose so all
right, I'm waiting on you're waitingon a refill. Make sure you got
the lid, because we don't wanthis dripping out of his sippy cup on
his face. Story number one fromclick Orlando dot com. Florida woman who

(08:41):
tried to kiss strangers calls nine oneone about lack of social distancing. A
Florida woman who kept trying to randomlykiss strangers at a local bar repeatedly called
nine one one to complain about thebusiness not practicing coronavirus social distancing guidelines.
According to the Melbourne Police Department,you ever had some woman, random woman

(09:01):
in a bar come up and layone on you? Uh negative. I
am drinking out of the first matecup tonight because I can't find my captain's
cup. As long as you're notdrinking captain out of the cup, you
know. I learned something new thisweek that if in the proper terminal and
I do um, I do likeum, diet coke and captain, Yeah,
that's called a skinny pirate. Askinny pirate. Yep, skinny pirate.

(09:22):
I thought it was called a dietCuba libre. I don't I don't
speak, I don't speak Creole,So I don't. I don't know Cuba
libreate. That's Spanish. Cuba libreis a rum and coke. No,
it's called a But I say itwas a skinny power skinny pirate all right.
Uh so back to the story.Police said al Dr Adams, age

(09:43):
thirty two, called nine one onea total of five times from Monkey Bar
and Grill in Indie Atlantic. I'venever heard of that place Indie Atlantic,
which is serving, which is open, serving both food and drinks, and
is allowed under Phase one reopening theFlorida. During the fourth time she called,
officers were already at the business,and on the fifth time, officers
were speaking to her. Record show. The owner of the bar said Adams

(10:07):
was inside trying to kiss random customers, and after multiple people complained, he
asked her to leave, but sheinitially argued and refused until she eventually made
her way out the front door.According to the affidavite, I've I've had
um. I would say, Iwas asking you if that's ever happened to
you. That actually did happen tome once when I was in Key West.
This was a wrong time ago.This was this was pre pre Uh

(10:28):
was a girl and my wife.Yes, it was a girl. I
was walking out of fat Days Actually, oh you fat twos? Are you
sure? Yeah? Yeah, uhand yeah, just walking out the out
the front door, and she walksright up to me, grabs both of
my cheeks and just planted one onme. Mia has her phone down in

(10:48):
the duck pen, right on theback of the broke big duck Phil and
h he's been rolled hard, uglyass chicken walking in front of him.
He's been rolled hard and put upwhen well, you hope he has rode
hard. Now he hasn't been rodehard. Good point, all right.
The New York City Health Department reportsthe COVID nineteen Ken's breadth kissing, So

(11:09):
that and any other close contact withanyone outside of the household should be avoided.
So only make out with your family. Yeah. Police said that Adams
left the bar, but refused toleave the parking lot even after she was
told about the trespassing morning, tellingofficers, I'll sit in the parking lot
all night. Well, if shewas as drunk as she sounds, that
might have been a good idea,because she didn't want to get a duy.

(11:30):
What she looked like. We gotpictures of her. Well, here's
the thing. If you follow thelink in the story, it's got her
mug shot. Talk about road hardand put away wet. She looks like
she's having a rough night, allright. But one of the stories,
if you google her name, oneof the stories has her Facebook profile picture
from from Christmas where she's all doneup for some Christmas party. It looks

(11:50):
like and yeah, she looks prettygood, all right. Would ask about
why I wouldn't be if she lookedlike her Facebook picture, I wouldn't complain
about her land one planning on ye? Yeah. When asked about why she
cooking like looking like her mug shot, Uh yeah, I'd kind of be
backing off to Okay, you done? If I was single? If I
was single? Are you done nowso I can finish the sentence? Sure,

(12:13):
go ahead, okay. When askabout why she called nine one one
so many times, Adams said thebar was not following health guidelines intended to
stop the spread of coronavirus worcord show. Yeah, there's some weird lady in
here running around and kissing everybody,police said. Adams repeatedly tried to pull
away as she was being escorted tothe patrol vehicle. She was arrested on
charges of trespassing after warning, disorderlyconduct, resisting an officer without violence,

(12:35):
and misuse of the nine one onesystem. Trespassing after warning. That's that's
a new one. I think fromthat goes on the list, which the
non existent list, right, whichone day we'll do maybe maybe here.
That's what interns are for, isn'tit in theory? Yes? But that
didn't gonna happen, Heather, Actually, uh, didn't she send us a
tech saying that she would do itfor us? If you have that in

(12:56):
writing, I think we should holdher to it. I do have it
in writing. Well, it's intext. Does that count? That's writing?
Yeah, she typed it down Aprilthe thirteenth. You guys have been
talking forever about writing down all thedifferent charges. Florida man gets. What
kind of incentive quote could I getfor going through all the episodes and getting
all those recorded for you guys?Twenty five cents an episode? We've had

(13:20):
how many episodes? Sixty one fivecents? Uh huh yeah, yeah,
well we'll have to we'll negotiate.I can negotiate that down, all right.
I have some dirt on her,So yeah we can, we can
get down. Uh yeah, youknow what there are. There was a
call that got recorded that went alot lot Yeah, yeah, I got

(13:41):
a little dirt you can do here. I got a better idea. How
about you do the ship for free? And we won't publish that phone callege
got recorded, all right? Movingon to story number two. Florida man
attacks a shopper who didn't thank himfor holding open the door to a Lakeland

(14:01):
liquor store. And this story comesto us from WFLA dot com. And
this story starts out with the fourbest words in Florida men history. The
Polk County Sheriff's Office is trying toidentify a man who is caught on surveillance
video attacking another customer at a liquorstore in Lakelands. Five The post five

(14:24):
the Polk County sheriff, I counton, I can't everything's backwards. I
wasn't including office because the office ismore than Sheriff Judd. Anyways, the
alleged attack happened at the Public's Liquorstore on Highway five forty East around twelve
thirty pm Saturday. According to deputies, the attack stemmed from the suspect getting
upset that the victim didn't thank himfor holding the door open. The victim,

(14:46):
who was seen in video released bythe Sheriff's office wearing a tan colored
hat, told deputies he walked intothe liquor store while the suspect held the
door open. The suspect, whowas seen wearing a black and gray shirt
and a black hat, then reportedhe said, you don't say thank you
to people who hold the door openfor you. The victim said he responded
saying thank you, but apparently thatwasn't enough. Polk County Sheriff Greedy Judd

(15:07):
said, because our now suspect,who was originally a gentleman, started jawing
back and forth. That's a Southernvernacular for talking back to each other.
The two men are seeing the videowalking to different parts of the liquor store
after the initial confrontation, but deputiessay the victim claims the suspect then continued
to express his anger from another aisle. According to the victim, the suspect

(15:30):
told him, I'll kick your assif you say another word. The victim
told deputies he replied by saying anotherword. That's great. That's when deputies
say, the suspect quickly approached thevictim and started attacking. That's what you
call escalation. Yeah, that gotout of hand really quick. Yeah.
The previous southern gentleman who held thedoor open, who's now The suspect promptly

(15:54):
was good for his word, SheriffJudd said, because he walked around the
aisle and started beating him up.Their surveillance video shows the suspect repeatedly hit
the victim, knocking the man's hatoff. A third man who was in
the store with the suspect, waseventually able to pull the suspect away from
the victim. The video shows thevictim and the suspect giving each other the
middle finger. As the suspect leavesthe store. Sheriff Judd said, come

(16:15):
on, man, what are youthinking? Were your three brain cells and
overload? Why don't you just letit go? Get you a bottle of
liquor, go back to the house, have you a drink? But no,
they have to have a kerfuffle rightthere in the middle of the store.
A kerfuffle. A kerfuffle kerfuffle ishusband with a K or a C.
That's with a K, k Rf U f l E. I

(16:37):
have never heard used in a sentence. Really. Nope, Well that's apparently
Grady Judd likes using it because hedid. Anyways, he says, we
have a battery complaint we need tofile against him, and we don't want
to miss out on that. Here'sour promise. We'll open the door for
you at the county jail and saythank you if you open the door first.
I love Grady. All right.Moving on story number three. Uh,

(17:07):
this comes to us from Boca NewsNow dot com. I'm assuming from
Boca Raton, Florida. Man threatenedrealator who emailed him about COVID nineteen.
All Right. The police report filedby PbSO i'm as Swimming Palm Beach Sheriff's
Office concerning alleged threats made via emailby Boyton's Robert Seagale now raises questions about

(17:32):
what incited the alleged threats and themarketing tactics used by area realistor Jennifer Kilpatrick.
Kilpatrick is the agent for the KarakeumI would say Keran group. Oh
sorry, Matthew Uh. In thepolice aff and it'd attained by Boca News
Now dot com, Kilpatrick to policethat she sent out a mass email to

(17:55):
a bunch of email addresses she boughtfrom the exact data of homeowners. If
the police report accurately represents the sourcesof Kilpatrick's email blast, she apparently purchased
it from a website that specializes inquote leads. Those are those sites that
you know, you think you're clickingon one thing, and you you click
click the yes, send me emailsabout your offers, and then they send

(18:18):
it out to whoever pays them moneyto get the quote unquote offers. So
we're she's always unchecked that box,all right, what I'm saying There is
no indication that Kilpatrick received permission fromemail recipients that they wanted to receive emils
from her. There is indication that'sSegal, age twenty two, was interested
in purchasing at home. Kilpatrick didnot respond to an email request for comment

(18:40):
from bocannews now dot com. Segalis accused of responding to Killpatrick's email blast
with threats, including a bomb threatinvolving FAU and that's Florida Atlantic University for
those of you not in the state. I am in the state and I
did not know that. Joel.Thank you he is facing charges of written
threats to kill and threat to placea destructive device. So let's get back

(19:02):
to the jest of this, whichthe article did not do very well of
explaining. So he all he didwas getting an email from this person about
buying a house, and he threatenedto blow her up. Oh and it
wasn't even an email about buying ahouse. There was an email about COVID
nineteen. He was released from thePalm Beach count of jail and twenty thousand
dollars buying. That's a quite abit for well, I guess, yeah,

(19:22):
if you're threatened to blow up auniversity, yeah, that's kind of
a serious charge. Sending email blastto recipients who did not opt in is
illegal under the Federal can Spam Actand can generate civil penalties up to sixteen
thousand dollars per violation. According tothe Federal Trade Commission, that's per email
addressed too, So if you sendit out to one hundred people, it's
sixteen thousand times one hundred. Yep, it is caught. It is unclear

(19:45):
if Kilpatrick's email blasts have been reportedto the FTC or any recipient have filed
at individual report. After receiving theblast, Kilpatrick to police she was sending
information about COVID nineteen. Exact Dataon his website claims that all email addresses
address are quote opt in and that'swhere she bought it from, so technically
she's probably on the up and up. Probably leads are sold at roughly ten

(20:08):
cents each. Exact Data is notaccused of wrongdoing. Kilpatrick reported Seagal's alleged
threats he allegedly replied to her emailblast to the pam Beach County Sheriff's office.
Seagal, according to Kirkpatrick, applied, would kill you. I kill
you, I kill you who Ikill you, I kill you the terrorist,

(20:29):
I kill you, I bomb FAU. Detectives investigated and arrest is Seagal
A court data is pending damn barelyhe's a fan of. If he wasn't
quoting Akhmed the the the dead terroristfrom Uh, what's that guy's name?
The ventriloquist doesn't Jeff Jeff, Yeah, if he wasn't quoting him, Uh,

(20:51):
he's not the not the best wordssmith. I think no cut.
Something tells me he's probably not inthe market for a new house, all
right, moving on to the FloridaMANO. Okay, this week's Florida Man
food fight comes to us from theSmoking Gun. Florida man in a domestic

(21:15):
poultry pelting. And you might wantto cover the ears of that chicken that's
on your screen there, Mia,because during an argument in their Florida home,
a man threw a piece of rawchicken meat at his wife, striking
her in the head, according topolice who arrested the alleged poultry pelter for
battery. Cops charged that Thomas Reese, age thirty four, and the victim

(21:38):
got into a verbal argument or afamily issue Friday Friday evening at their Saint
Petersburg residence. As detailed an arrestaffidavit, Reese quote got mad, took
a piece of raw chicken and threwit at his thirty four year old spouse.
The chicken struck the woman in theback of the head. Good.
Yeah, that's not too those.I mean that that's actually a good shot.

(21:59):
I mean because r Jacob slippery.Yeah, and as long as it
wasn't frozen, it probably didn't hurther. It's too bad. Reese's wife
subsequently gathered up his clothes in alaundry basket and placed him by the front
door, telling him he had toleave. Yeah, no, no,
no, not in just a basket. I mean it takes more in that
for all my ship. At leastshe didn't throw him out on the lawn.

(22:21):
Reese then tossed the basket across theroom, striking his wife with the
container. Cops a legend. Ohthat's yeah, he needs to go.
Reese reportedly quote admitted to these actions. According to the affidavit, which identifies
the accused as an employee of Low's, the six foot four, two hundred
and seventy four pound Reese Damn,that's a big dude. He was arrested

(22:41):
for domestic battery and booked into thecounty jail on the misdemeanor count. Reese,
who was released on his own recognizanceyesterday afternoon, has been ordered by
a judge to have no contact withhis wife. Reese's rap sheet includes a
twenty thirteen grand theft charge that wasdismissed after he successfully completed a pre trial
intervention program. He was also arrestedin two thousand and nine domestic battery,
but prosecutors declined to file chargers inthat case. So what was the what

(23:04):
was the what was the jest ofthe verbal argument other than a family issue?
A family issue? And she packedup his ship in a laundry basket
and set it by the door andtold him to get the hell out.
I am. That's when he threwit at her. And I mean the
chicken thing is I mean, stillthrowing something at somebody's bad, but the

(23:26):
chicken raw chicken in the back ofthe head is a little bit funny.
But but yeah, no throwing thebasket at somebody, that's Yeah, it
would have been more than twenty Howmuch was it to say how much he
was? He just released on hisown recognizance, so he didn't get bail.
Yeah, if that had been thathad been a thing of Popeyes,
Oh should they'd have thrown the bookat him. Yeah, especially extra crispy,
I know, spicy shit. Yeah, oh get that in the eye.

(23:52):
All right, So here we gointo headlines of the week. These
are stories that didn't quite have enoughcontext to u be a whole story,
but we're basically where the headline saysit all. So here we go.
This is one Actually I'm gonna startwith the last one I got on here
This one actually happened here in town, Florida. Man dives into a Bass
Pro shop fish tank, and there'sa video of that one. There is

(24:14):
a video of that one. Uhhere in this he does a pretty good
dive too, because it was anice swan dive right into the into the
tank with all the bass and handsfirst. But yeah, proper form and
he didn't. He didn't do acannonball or a can opener. No,
that's our local Bass Pro shop.Yeah, yeah, many time, many
times. Actually it was a swandive, not a broke dick dug dive.

(24:34):
No, Although I don't know howbroke got a gift card, I
need to go spend it at thatbass broke. I think a broke dick.
I think a broke dick duck divewould be moral on the lines of
a can opener with one leg insteadof being your legs perpendicular, that they
would be that. Then instead ofparallel, they'd be perpendicular. You have
one leg flying off to the leftand then you reach up with other leg.
Yeah, that'd be a broke dickduck. Yeah. And if your

(24:56):
dick wasn't broke, it would bebroke after the yeah, because you go
in you go in balls first.Yep. But this see, I've I've
been in that bass Pro shop manytimes and looked in that fish tank and
thought the exact same thing. Iwas like, I wonder if everybody ever
dived in there. So on thenews they actually had, they actually had
a lawyer there and said, well, if there wasn't a sign saying no

(25:17):
diving allowed, I really don't havea leg to stand on. Forget common
sense. Yeah, it's not likethere's piranhas or anything in there. They're
all just regular. Uh you knowthe one now, the one of the
ones in Louisiana. They have guarsin theirs. They have a lot of
Teata may not want to jump innow one um now. Next headline,
Florida man awakened by his barking dogsfinds a naked man in his kitchen who

(25:40):
just got out of prison. Thatwas in Tampa Bay. I would you
like to wake up and find anaked manning kitchen? I wouldn't like to
wake up and find a naked mananywhere? What if it was a naked
woman? All bets are off?Next headline, what she looked as smar,
I'm going on. We'll figure thatpart out later. Have to forty

(26:02):
eight ish game on. Yeah,but what Jean's right, what if she
just got out of prison, thenshe's desperate. I gotta be to make
a living. Um, this isa hobby, abby all right. Florida
Man's fake resume said he was awar hero, an MT professor, and

(26:22):
a bit calm millionaire with top secretclearance for the company hired him. Yeah,
yeah, they hired him to dowhat? Who knows? They hired
him? Though? Maybe that's whatI should start to start lying on my
resume. You know about I'm aboutyou. I'm about to use broke dig
Dug phil as as a as areference might as well. And lastly,

(26:45):
you know I saw I saw onuh Shitty life pro tips, which is
a page on Reddit. Get likethree or four burner phones if you're looking
for a job and use those asyour references and just put a label on
each phone as to what accent you'resupposed to use. And lastly, headline
Florida Man describes surviving lockdown and supposedlyhaunted house. He's locked down in a

(27:08):
haunted house. Something tells me,Yeah, it was pretty much like lockdown
anywhere else? Did um. Wemay have to hit so we may have
to edit this out. But haveyou done the for the quickie? Did
you see them? It's been everywhere. The people who robbed it was in
Phoenix, I think where they robbedthe liquor store or the convenience store or
the watermelons on her head. That'shilarious. That's the headlines for this week,

(27:30):
where basically headline tells it all.And yep, we live in the
great state of Florida where you neverknow what the hell is going to happen.
Are you ready to fill in theblank this week? Yep, June's
gonna help me. The June's gonnahelp me all right. Florida divers find

(27:52):
blank in the ocean off Panama CityBeach. Florida divers fine blank in ocean
off Panama City Beach. Well,there wouldn't be an anaconda no off the
Panama City beach. Um. Floridadivers find gold incorrect, drugs incorrect.

(28:29):
I will give you damn it,June. I'll give you a hint if
you will like. Sure the ownerof the original or the original owner of
the item is a war veteran.They found a tank. The war veteran

(28:52):
would not own said tank that wouldbe property of the US Army. So
I'm gonna let you do it onemore, June says, uh, medals
of honor incorrect. Damn it,June is the last time I get your
so this story if I can getrid of all the links that you pasted
into the way here. Florida teenagerSebastian Morris got a leg up towards his

(29:15):
goal of becoming a treasure hunter whilerecently diving in Saint Andrew State Park.
The thirteen year old from Santa RosaBeach found a buried, fully functional prosthetic
leg while diving with his father,Bobby Morris, and the Jetties in the
park a week ago. The twohave since wait wait wait wait wait wait
wait, Yes, how the hellhas a prosthetic leg got to do with

(29:36):
a veteran he got it blown offin the war. How am I supposed
to know that? Uh? Yesit was. I should have thought,
I should have thought out of thebox and we should have not gone with
the obvious and went with yeah.Bobby Morris said of his son, he's
very excited about finding more about it. We hope to find the owner and
connect them with the limb. Morrissaid the leg is made of titanium and

(29:56):
carbon fiber and appeared to be ingood work ordered despite it being found underwater
and sand. The leg is currentlyin Morris's home in his son's room.
It couldn't have been down there long. There were no barnacles or anything growing
on at Morris said. Morris saidthere were no markings on the leg other
than a serial number and the nameof the company that made it. Morris
said he'll contact the company off theFacebook page he made fails to produce results.

(30:18):
He noted that the leg doesn't appearlarge enough for an adult man.
Quote it's small, so we're speculatingthat it looks like it belonged to a
child or a female, Morris said. Morris, who is a commercial diver,
said his son only recently obtained hiscoop of certification. The pair had
been diving in Destin but decided totry the jetties at Saint Andrew's a week
ago. It only took his sonaround twenty minutes of being in the water

(30:41):
to find the leg. Morris saidhe just saw the leather strap exposed in
the sand. He started fanning thesand away. He wrestled with it for
ten or twelve minutes before he gotit out. Morris said his whole goal
is to become a treasure hunter.Morris noted that he's been a diver since
nineteen ninety four and his son's findis rare, even for experienced divers.
Usually people just find sunglasses or hats. The coolest thing I've ever found as

(31:02):
a cassette tape. He said.He was searching the rocks like he was
searching for treasure. He's pretty awesometo find it. And there's an update.
The title of this update is legfound in Santa Andrews State Park returned
to owner. Carter. Hess's friendsnever seem to miss an opportunity to kid
him about his artificial leg by sendinghim online stories of found prosthetics. Quote.
I surf a lot, and soevery time a leg is found,

(31:25):
they get a kick out of it. Unquote head said, put hums.
They get a kick out of thefound leg. Then, on Monday,
a friend tagged him online with astory from the Panama City News Herald about
a leg found in St. Andrew'sState Park, and this time the story
was actually about him. Hess,who was originally from Panama City, was
reunited with his prosthetic leg on Tuesdayafter losing it last month while surfing.

(31:47):
Sebastion Morris, the thirteen year oldfrom Santa Rosa Beach, had recently found
the leg while diving and treasure huntingwith his father, Bobby Morris, who
then started an online campaign to findthe owner and return it. Sebastian was
determined to find the owner and orabout the leg he dug up in the
jetties of the park, his fatherhad said. After contacting them online,
Hess met with Sebastian and his motherto get his leg and take them out

(32:07):
to dinner. Quote. I've beenvery upfront that this is a very amazing,
great young man unquote, Hess saidof Sebastian. Quote A lot of
guys, especially treasure hunters, wouldhave just put it in a trophy case,
but he realized it could be importantand someone could need it. No
shit, he dude topping around withoutit. Hess first got the three thousand

(32:29):
dollars titanium leg at Walter Read MedicalCenter in Maryland. The prosthetic was specifically
adapted for Hess to use while surfing. He lost his original leg when he
stepped on an ied in twenty twelvewhile serving in Afghanistan. Hess who served
for years before his injury, reallyliked the artificial leg and used it to
surf all over the world, fromBali to Central America to Hawaii. Quote

(32:52):
we were actually going to make acopy of it, has said of he
and his care team at Walter Read. But then last month he turned into
a wave at Saint Andrew and itcrashed down on him. Quote. I
knew immediately it was off of mehath set of the leg. I've surfed
in much bigger waves and it nevercame off like that. You'd think you'd
want like a float or some kindof attachment on it, because maybe you

(33:12):
have like a like one of thosefloats you put on infants, yeah,
or like on your GoPro camera.Oh like juns did put the leash on
it? Yeah, exactly, Wellthey have the leash on the on the
surfboards anyways, right, yeah.Yeah, But it doesn't do a lot
of good if you're if you're ifyou if you put the leash on your
prosthetic leg and your leg and falloff, then it kind of defeats the
purpose of having the leash and keepingonto the surfboard. Well, the leaf

(33:36):
isn't. The leash isn't to keepthe surfboard. In this case, the
leash is to keep the leg.You would think, yeah, or you
could get two leashes, one tohold the surfboard to your good leg and
one to hold the surfboard or theleg to the surfboard to your good leg.
Yes, oh, I got itall right. Sebastian Morris ended up
finding it mostly buried about thirty feetaway from where he lost it in the

(33:58):
jetties. Quote. I don't thinkI would have ever found it, has
said. He said he plans tosurf with the leg again later this week,
depending on the waves. He saidhe also plans to keep in touch
with Sebastian and maybe take him scubadiving once day if his dad permits it.
Quote, he's a good, nicekid, has said. I thought
that was kind of fun. Iwould have never gotten prosthetic leg all right.
Before we get to the story numberfive and the interns not paying attention,

(34:21):
I'm out of blik wood refreshment.I'm on my second one already.
It was my last beer in thehouse. I gotta go get some more,
slow down, Joel. We don'twant you to get drunk or nothing.
Well, you know, I wasat work up until twenty minutes before
we started here, so I didn'thave a chance to drink all day.

(34:43):
Moving on to story number five orsink go for our Spinnish speaking friends.
This comes to us from Fox fournow sent in by Sarah. This is
down here in our part of them, our neck of the woods, yep,
Florida. Man exposes himself to awoman drinking her coffee on her porch,
Naples condominium. Like we haven't alldone that once before in our lifetime.

(35:04):
The Naples spots depends on who itis. Responded to a call regarding
a male suspect playing with the genitalsand a Naples condom YEP. A police
report stated the victim lived on thesecond floor of the condominium and her back
porch overlooks the pool and the pooldeck. The victim stated she walked out
to the porch and set down adrink her coffee. At that time,
she observed a Hispanic male described aswearing a red sweater and no pants are

(35:28):
underwear standing by the pool. That'san interesting outfit to go out and about
it it is because we don't wearsweaters down here very often now. But
I bet it was a hood now. Even now, we don't wear hoodies
as hot as hell, the suspectspersing in the morning a couple days ago,
it might have been might have beencool enough to wear a hoodie.
The suspects, all right, Thesuspects pecker and muddocks were completely exposed,

(35:52):
the victims stated. The suspect lookedover to her and said, quote,
this is what you do to me. You make this, and proceeded to
walk over to the lounge chair andlaid down on the chair. The suspects
stated, this is where you sit. The suspect lifted his legs and played
with his pecker and masturbated outside atthe pool. So the way they're they're

(36:14):
describing this condo, so the backporch overlooks the pool in the pool deck.
There's got to be a ton ofother condos there that can see this
pool and see him just sitting downthere, just yanking on it. The
victim stated, is she screamed andcalled nine one one? Is the scream
really necessary to necessary? On thesecond floor on your leni And he's downstairs

(36:35):
at the pool. It's not reallyhere. Your life's not in danger,
right, That's what I'm saying.It's not like she could go inside.
You could go inside. Yeah,she wanted to watch. Well, that's
what he thought. The victim statedis she'd never she had never seen the
suspect before, but that she regularlytook a morning swim in the pool,
the victim stated. The victims stated, the suspect said, this is where

(36:55):
you sit. The victim observed thesuspects sitting in the pool. Check she
regularly uses who he's been stalking her. She felt this was the suspect explaining
how he was stalking her and hadwatched her on previous occasions. Yep.
The victim advised she swam in themorning and used that very lounge chair.
The victim had not been outside hercondominium that morning, so he's been there

(37:16):
multiple days then Yep, and Holyfinally decided that he was going to pull
the trigger. Literally. An officerin the victim were able to identify the
suspect as Joshua Joshua, age thirtynine, Asheserata, Yeah Aida. He
was arrested and charged with quote exposedof sexual organs vulgar indecent manner, are

(37:40):
naked in public, laitering or prowling, resisting officer without violence to his person,
stalking, simple slash without threat.That's a lot of that's a lot
of charges for playing with your peckerin public. Well, I think a
lot of it had to do withthe fact that he talked to her and
then mentioned that he'd been watching heror implied that he had been watching her.

(38:02):
Also, when Sarah sent us thisemail, she said, you have
to look at the mug shot.You put it up. You can just
follow the link and I'll put it. I'll put it in the show artwork
for the for the listeners. Ohdear. He's surprised that they're taking his
picture, which shouldn't surprise him becausehe's got a rap sheet because he's been

(38:23):
arrested before. Oh my god,I gotta be you gotta put that in
there. Oh my god. It'slike someone just stuck their finger up his
hand. Oh my god. Thatthat is the most So I just went

(38:53):
he kind of looks like a LatinoFreddie Mercury, doesn't he just stuck their
finger and saying I was like woooooh man, oh, I think what
I need to do is start changingour fourd of men avatar on all of

(39:16):
our social media too, to oneof these mug shots every week, because
that's some what the look I givewhen I when I go to the doctrine,
he goes bend over, you know. Yeah who June says, I
don't know if that or last week'squickie is a better mug shot? Which
one was the one from last week? June? Oh, I was hammered

(39:37):
by time we got to that one, So I have no idea the big
oh yeah, yeah, yeah,yeah, the guy crying, Oh my
god, that is great. Butwhen they didn't say did he finish?
I mean, was there was there? Was there? Where? Was there
money shot on this? Or wasit very They did not mention that,
and that is poor reporting, itis, but that's I mean, that's

(40:00):
that's essential information. It is.And on that same note, Yeah,
for our final story, Sarah sentus another story. Florida man accused of
exposing himself claims he needed to airout. So um, yeah, Sarah,
have you been um searching out theseparticular types of stories because a Florida

(40:27):
man Oh this is from click Orlandoand yes, sent to us again by
Sarah a Florida man who got caughtexposing himself to women while driving, says
he quote airs it out unquote sometimesbecause he gets hot. According to the
Polk County Sheriff's Office, Phil youcan, you can? Uh? Oh
yeah, I had, I can, and now because I we have a
jeep and uh, I have ajeep and uh and and a lot of

(40:51):
times in the summer, well actuallyin the winter down here, we rather
the doors off on the top off. And I a very good friend of
mine convinced me where were we.We were in um Port, Charlotte,
and we were coming back down theinterstate back here to Fort Bars and um
somehow I had a I was havinga bad underwear date and uh yeah,
so and then I started asking somehowthe conversation came up, what kind of

(41:15):
you know, do you boxer's briefs? Whatever? But what kind of underwear?
Con man? These things are justdriving me crazy, Like everybody,
every one of my friends there,oh, we all go, we go,
I go commando. I wear underwear. Seriously, nobody wears underwear in
here. So I went to thebath boys need a house to quote Cramer,
Yeah, I go to the bathroomand just and and and and take
them off. Actually I ripped himto get them and UH got him off

(41:36):
and put him in, put himin the UH put him in the trash,
which later on I got to thinking, you know, poor dude that
had to input the trash. There'sa pair of draws in there. It's
not the it's not like they gothrough the trash item buy item. They
just bag the hole, scrabbed thewhole bag. But so then I was
driving, shit your pants did youNo? No, I didn't. I
didn't. I didn't shart or anything. So I go and uh, I

(41:59):
got my leg out the door goingon the highway in that wind comes up
from the outside down through my shorts. Yeah, because you gotta stick your
you gotta stick your leg out.Leg My leg was hanging out. Yeah,
I had my hand my foot pegsin and that wind was coming up
and looping through and just like Iwas the most beautiful feeling ever. I
know what this man is going through. Okay. Well. Deputy said that
a woman called nine one on Mayeleventh to report that she was stopped at

(42:21):
a red light on Highway sixty nearthe Lake Wales Municipal Airport around eight am.
When she noticed the driver of theMazda that was next to her waving
and trying to get her attention.So, uh, he was not driving
a jeep. He was driving aMazda, and he was pretty much wanting
to show it off. She lookedover to see the man's penis completely exposed,

(42:44):
and then saw him begin to touchhimself inappropriately record show. Well,
hang on, all right, hangon, he's in a most so let's
assume. But miata here, Imean, what if she can see what
was she driving? If she cansee in it? Well, if she
if he's in a Mazda, ina miataka in vertibal I mean, if
she's in any an suv or something, to seat down into it. Otherwise

(43:06):
the man's hung I mean if vignif if she can, if it's a
parallel, help over the door.Who damn, that's impressive, dude,
strong, that's strong. You shouldbe. That's strong. Uh. Photos
the victim took and a description shewas able to provide, helped deputies identify.

(43:27):
She took pictures of it. Shetook pictures of it. She took
pictures that it helped deputies identify thirtytwo year old Justin Mosser as a suspect
in the case. According to it, So she so she had her phone
out taking pictures while she's driving.So she was texting while she was driving.
She was dexting. Yes, that'sa law. That's against the law
yep in Florida, it is.So. Yeah, if you're a picture,

(43:49):
right, if you the receiving endof that, you would think that's
you. She likes what she sees. Oh, you know, if you're
taking a picture. So she's takenthe dick picts and sending him to the
cops in interesting yeah, uh,deputy said, they began, I got
a question. I got a question. Hang on, hang on? What
slow for it? Go for it, June. Have you ever taken dick
picks from a guy across the uhat a stoplight or something that ever happened

(44:12):
to you? And it has neverhappened to me, I'll be honest with
you. No, with a lotof ohs. So you never nobody ever
flashed you on the road. I'venever been flashed. Bullshit. I know
for a fact you've been flashed becauseI saw you flashed once. W Uh.
We were out on a jeep trailand it was a mutual friend of

(44:35):
ours. Oh that's a good point. Yes, I have been playing.
Oh I'd like to recant that lasttime in your officer, and that's gonna
get cut out of the episode.So that's just for you patrons. Um
I forgot about that any right.Deputy said they began conducting surveillance on Mosser
Wednesday morning, and as a femaledetective was driving near him on Highway twenty

(44:57):
seventh in an unmarked vehicle, shehim trying to get her attention and looked
over to see him exposed and touchinghimself inappropriate. He's a serial toucher.
Yep, he's got a modus operandimethod of operation. After a traffic stop
was conducted, Deputy's told monster OrDeputy said Master told them that he often
drives with his penis out of hispants because he gets hot and airs it

(45:21):
out. I mean that part Ican understand. Part I can, But
don't yourn a wave at the ladiesas you're driving. You know what,
you look at this? Now youget your tube, You get you something
that flexible, uh vent like theyused for the dryers. Yeah, I'm
drying. Yeah, and you takethat and you duct tape it. Over
the exhaust of your vehicle. I'mnot exhausted the air conditioner vent of the

(45:45):
vehicle, and you and and yourun that up up three your pants legs.
There is a there's a company whodoes that for heater. I know
that does heater. That that doesthat. They make a jacket yep,
and you plug it in. It'slike a spacesuit thing. Ace Engineering does
that. Yep. They call itthe lava jacket. It hooks up to
yeah. Gee, but it's justnot the same as if you put it

(46:05):
up inner your leg though true.Of course, who wants to buy a
pair of pants that like, likeparachute pants that have a third leg in
the middle. Yeah, I know, right, unless the air went the
other way than maybe. Yeah.Records show that Mosser admitted to exposing himself
to four or five random women whiledriving and expressed no remorse for his actions.
Quote. First, nobody wants tosee that. It's disgusting, rude,

(46:27):
and perverted. Second, it's dangerousto be doing something like this while
driving. This is wrong on somany levels. Great work by the detectives
to find this guy so quickly.He said he's done this before, So
we're asking for his other victims tocontact the sheriff's office, said Polk County
Sheriff Grady Judd. We got youall got a twofur of Grady Judd and
a tufur of Florida Man exposing himselfto women who just didn't want to see

(46:52):
its is facing three counts of indecentexposure and two counts of committing a lewd
act. June says, if Isaw it, laugh how many times?
How many times does that happen toyou? Joel? That I got that,
I got somebody shown you. Nothat somebody points to your becker and

(47:14):
laughs. No, because I havenone, because I don't show it to
anybody. Just willy nilly Florida.But that's America's wing. They prefer the
Sunshine State. Well that's the showfor this week, folks. Uh.
Please subscribe to Florida Man wherever you'rehearing us right now our floridam in podcast
dot com slash subscribe and please rateus five stars or lead review on pod

(47:34):
Chaser or Apple Podcasts. We'll readyour review on the show and it really
helps us get found by new listeners. We are at Florida Man pod on
all the social media thingies. Ouremail is fordham In Podcast at gmail dot
com and our voicemail is five sixseven four three two nine six seven four.
And last week when there were abunch of wildfires in our area,
David M. Sent us a messageto make sure we were okay. I

(47:58):
let them know that they were inthe area but not close enough to be
worried about. But we were ableto see and spell the smoke from our
house. And thanks David for yourconcern. I'm not sure what just walked
past me as camera on the farm, but it looked like a t rex
or at least a big ostrich.Maybe it was a goose or a turkey.
Maybe this is a turkey right infront of us right now. It's

(48:20):
not a turkey. That's a turkey. No, that's not biggo it's a
big turkey. Well, how doyou know how big it is? You
don't know how close it is.That's a good point. Look at that
ugly ass head. That's a turkey. He's got the wall, he's got
the gobble gobble thing out of theway so I can say broke dig duck
field. Oh, thank you miam. That's a that's not a turkey is
it. It's a guinea. It'sa guiney. I was about to say
that it was a guiney. Ithought a guinea was like a coin.

(48:40):
So it's a guinea, not damnturkey. The fuck is another reason that
it's not. That's another reason youwill not survive in the zombie apocalypse because
I can't identify it. I'm aboutable to identify wildlife. Well, I
identify it well enough to know thatit would probably be good eating. You
don't eat guineas. Ticks are awesome. Yep, eat what ticks? Oh?

(49:04):
They eat ticks? Tis now kidsnot ticks? Yeah, I said,
tis controlling pest populations. Yes,everybody knows that. Joel specifically ticks,
and they're a lout as fuck.So people keep them because they're like
little alert dogs. You know,they'll be like, oh, someone's here,
fuck you. Well that's why Ihave dogs. I've completely lost our

(49:24):
place. Yeah, exactly. Sothey're like lots and lots of dogs.
That lots of dogs. They willeat ticks and yeah, apparently duck broke
dig duck Phil either doesn't see himor doesn't care because he hasn't moved and
they've been all around him. Ohhe doesn't. Yeah, he don't care.
He's the kid. He knows hecan beat the shit out them if
you want them to. Phil theDuck doesn't give a fuck. He could

(49:45):
take them. Oh he could.Oh no, no, no, he
could take them if you wanted to, just keep the ship out of them.
Real good. He's actually laid thebeat down on Joel the Yeah,
that's happened in real life too,you wish. Well, it's because it's
like you're sucking them right now.No, it's cute because it's cute because
Jewel just kind of takes it.It's just like, yeah, I think

(50:06):
it's like, yeah, that thatis. That is how it works.
Is usually it works. It's noteven worth the effort. All right,
Well, if you want to supportthe show, you can send us something
from our go this is going south? All right? Yeah, let's uh,
do you have any donkeys on thefarm? But no one? Go

(50:31):
oh, goat goats will be nice. Do you have the kind of goats
that faint? No? Well actuallyyeah, um, the one is she's
a mix, she's partially that,but she doesn't actually faint. How can
you how the hell can you bea partial goat. It's just like a
sad a duck. I'm sorry,like a dog, like I'm mixed.

(50:52):
Yeah, like a mixed half goathalf dog, be dogging be like just
a mix. It's a half.But what is a mix? What was
it mixed? Will it's up exactly? No, Like it's just a mutt
like sound like a fainting goat mixedwith like a boar goat or with a
you know, an angora mix orBarbara the fuck you know, you just
have mixed. But it is anotherduck. So there inter the coach racial

(51:15):
relationships you have and you support interracialgoats. That's some fucking that's that's very
progressive of like, thank you forreframing. Thank you for reframing my Discovery
Channel animal behavior naturalist moment to memaking duck poems. Thanks for that came
across the problem. I made mehappy. That's what we're here for.

(51:37):
What intern? She needs to putpants on? What I forgot? You
didn't have any underworld, but she'sgot bridges own? Oh giving away the
secrets? Aren't your film? Inthe back of the end, June,
I agree that it is stupid asfuck that you can't rate or review us
on Spotify that I don't know whythey don't do that. Um oh,

(51:59):
hey, did you dude? Didyou hear? I don't know if who
are you? Who are you referringto a dude? Well, seeing as
how you're the only dude here besidesme. Um Joe Rogan, you know
how, he's like the biggest podcastin the world right now? He just
signed an exclusive contract with Spotify.Uh in like later this year. He's
You're only going to be able tolisten to his podcast on Spotify. How

(52:21):
come nobody's contacted us, That's whatI'm saying, because he was making thirty
million dollars. Fucking Joe Rogan doesn'thave a damn duck named after him.
Goddamn right, he doesn't not yethe never will. Fucker that copycat.
He could buy a bunch of ducksand name him all after himself too.
All right, let's get this overwith. We gotta get on the Patreon

(52:43):
thing. I'm gonna be drunk beforewe get to the damn Patren do we
have to? Yeah? Yeah,yeah, all right. So, uh,
I just took my medication, soI'm good. I took my medication,
so I'm good for right now.Okay. If you want to support
the show, you can send ussomething from our Amazon wish list, or
you can drop something in our onlinetip jar at PayPal me slash Florida Men.
Or to get early access and extendedad, free episodes and other cool

(53:05):
stuff, you can subscribe at patreondot com slash Florida Men, and links
to all three of those places willbe in the show notes. Oh my
god, I'm about spill a littlemix in that is that pure vodka?
It was pure vodka. Whoo ah. We'd like to thank our Patreon subscribers
personally. They are at the JacksonvilleTier, Cassandro and Wally at the Tampa

(53:28):
Tire, Colin, David, Jason, kat Michael d Michael m one Foot
in the Grave podcast, Patrick,Randy, Roxanne and Julia. At the
Tallahassee Tier, we have Alison Conath, Erica, Heather who JP, Kurt
Matthew from Washington State, Nicole Paradisedafter Dark podcast, Sarah Tea, Tony,
Stephanie and Natian. At the DaytonaTier, we have Jessica, Katie,

(53:52):
Kim Mia and June who just upgradedfrom Tallahassee. Thank you June.
Thank you June at the Orlando Tier, we have Steven Danielle. At the
Miami Tier, we have James fromCoco, Wicked Spades, The Space Ghost
Season, Travis and this week ourPatreon bonus story is about a pistol packing
pooch promenader and you can only hearit if you're one of our Patreon subscribers.

(54:15):
This program has provided for informational useonly. No warranty of professional relationships
implied, and no refunes will begranted. Views expressed on this program are
solely the opinions of Shady Side Media, LLC and are not intended to diagnose,
treat, cure, or prevent anydisease, and do not imply an
endorsement by our sponsors, spouses,families, employers, each other, or
the Florida Board of Tourism. Yeah, the two black birds upon me as

(54:37):
thing looked like big boobs up there. It's like, you know what they
look like a bra hanging down.It's like a bra hanging a bra of
a big breasted woman. I likehow the intern points out the boobs for
you. That's that's a that's relationships, right, it does it is trust
me, it's mine. Never cheatI don't do it. I'm never gonna
do any better. Any brought ready, rebroadcast, production, or retransmission without

(55:00):
express written Consider Major League Baseball.If they were actually playing baseball, it's
prohibited. All suspects should be consideredinsolent until proving guilty in a court of
law. This podcast was recorded atSouthern Audio Production Studios in Fort Myers,
Florida, and Sheltered in Play Studiosin Beneath Springs, Florida, and mixed
poolside right where you like to sit. And as always, we'll finish up

(55:21):
tonight with the ballot of the FloridaMan. Florida Man, Florida Man.
It might be crazy, might bestupid. He's a Florida man. He's
got his feet in the sun whilehe works on his tan. He's got
an annual pass to disteat Land draces, fear from a canny lives in his

(55:45):
fans a mobal tiny house inside.It's Florida Man, Florida Man. Might
be crazy, might be stupid.He's a Florida Man, Florida Man.
He's a dumb ass, but weloving me. He's a man. I'm

(56:07):
done with Tracy. I'm not talkingto her it's over all right, done,
not gonna not gonna happen. Allright, Well, um, shit
almost fell over backwards, and I, on my watch would be prudent.

(56:30):
Yeah, that joke's only thirty yearsold. It is. It's still funny
though almost good at the hot tub. I would say, half of our
listeners don't even know what the fuckyou're talking about. I know they don't
google David Spade, George, butthat was not David Spade. M that
was Dana Carvey. Dana Carvey,not David. Yeah, Dana Carvey,
you're right, Dana Carvey not David'sspady. Sorry, church Lady. Wasn't

(56:52):
that special garth from Waynesborod? Okay, we identified that I was wrong.
Okay, can we move on insteadof rubbing it in that I don't know
what I'm talking about. Where's thepositive reinforcement here? That's twenty percent of
the funny in this show. Where'sthe support from the colleagues and from our
listeners. Yeah, kick the fatkid? Huh? Out of the two
of us, you're not the fatkid. The preceding podcast is copyright twenty

(57:15):
twenty Shadyside Media, LLC. Allrights reserved.

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160 - Florida Flashers, Barfly Bussers, Poultry Pelter, and Do-Good Diver

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}160 - Florida Flashers, Barfly Bussers, Poultry Pelter, and Do-Good Diver