Get Sex-Smart

Recent studies show that there is a big orgasm gap between men in women: roughly 65% of heterosexual women orgasm in partner sex, compared to an overwhelming 95% of heterosexual men. What's really interesting though is that lesbian women's orgasm rates are very close to those of heterosexual men at 85%. On today's episode, Dr. Valeria and sex coach Sarah Martin talk about some of the reasons why orgasm rates are so much higher in l...

Breakups are often painful, heartbreaking, and difficult to navigate. In this episode, Sarah Martin shares her recent personal experience of breakup and chats with Dr. Valeria about the newest science of breakups; why we are often so bad at breaking up; and what we can do to reduce the pain of ending our relationships. 

EPISODE NOTES:
Break up as a signifiant stress event, and "broken heart" syndrome: https://www.nbcnews.com/

In today's episode, Dr. Valeria and Sarah Martin break down the groundbreaking concept of arousal non-concordance. Simply put, our physical (genital) arousal doesn't always match our psychological arousal. This dramatically changes the way we view sexual desire, pleasure and consent. Tune in to learn why arousal non-concordance is important, and how it can change your sex life.  

EPISODE NOTES:

Emily Nagoski's Ted Talk, "The Truth ...

Get Sex-Smart is back from the summer break! In today's episode, Dr. Valeria and Sarah Martin chat about high libido women. Conventional thinking tells us that men tend to be more interested in sex than women and that women with high libidos are rare. But how true is that? And, while many men say that they would love for their female partner to be more sexually assertive, what actually happens when a woman wants sex more than her m...

In this episode, Dr. Valeria and sex coach Sarah Martin take a look at the concept of "sexual scarcity" or lack of sex, and the idea of the right to sex (or as some would call it, sexual entitlement). Tune in to find out how the sexual scarcity mindset affects our intimate relationships and sexual satisfaction, and how we can positively address the real feelings of frustration, sexual shame and disconnect that are the driving force...

Today, Dr. Valeria and Sarah Martin are sharing their expert tips that will help take your masturbation practice from merely good to amazing. But that's not all! In today's fun bonus feature, Dr. Valeria and Sarah play a rousing round of sexual "Would You Rather" - with pretty hilarious and unexpected results. Make sure to stick around after the main discussion of masturbation is wrapped up, both to learn a fun and sexy game and to...

In today's episode, Dr. Valeria is interviewing therapist, researcher, author and kink sex educator Galen Fous. Galen shares his 5 keys to exploring our personal kinks and to successfully integrating them into our sex lives. We also discuss sexual shame, the challenges of sexual incompatibility between partners, the need for more sexual and kink education for therapists, and more. An in-depth and fascinating interview!

EPISODE NOTE...

When it comes to sex, most of us have a past, along with some secrets and information that we keep private. But with relationships comes an expectation of sharing. So, what exactly should you be sharing with your partners, and how much? In this episode, Dr. Valeria and sex coach Sarah Martin talk about what is reasonable to keep to yourself and what should be revealed in sexual relationships. Specifically, they discuss what to reve...

Unsolicited "dick pics" have become ubiquitous in popular culture. Pretty much any woman who tries online dating inevitably ends up receiving her share of unwanted images of men's genitalia. So, why are men so keen on sharing photos of their penises with unsuspecting women? In this episode of the Get Sex-Smart podcast, Dr. Valeria and sex coach Sarah Martin discuss the most common reasons why men like to send dick pics, and the pro...

Many dating experts specializing in heterosexual relationships believe that women should make men wait before having sex for the first time. Some believe that withholding sex creates a challenge so many men crave and increases a woman's value; others say that securing a commitment from a man before rewarding him with sex leads to a more secure relationship. In this episode, Dr. Valeria and sex coach Sarah Martin take on this type o...

Having an active sex life with our partners often has a positive effect on our relationships. But did you know that having sex can help you perform better at work? In a recent study published in the Journal of Management, researchers found that when employees had sex at home, they reported feeling good at work the next day, as well as feeling more engaged and performing better. In this episode, Dr. Valeria and sex coach Sarah Marti...

Sex-positive comprehensive sex education is rare in many places in the world, including the United States. For those of us trying to have sexual relationships, this means just doing our best and hoping it works. Unfortunately, our best often comes from porn, which was never designed to be an accurate representation of what sex actually looks like. In this episode, Dr. Valeria and sex coach Sarah Martin talk about seven types of sex...

Surrogate partner therapy isn't very well known to the general public, aside from receiving the Hollywood treatment in the movie "The Sessions". In truth, surrogate partner therapy can be an extremely effective and powerful healing modality for people suffering from a variety of relationship, intimacy and sexuality challenges. In this episode, Dr. Valeria interviews Andrew Heartman, IPSA certified surrogate partner, about what surr...