696: Googliearchs

In this episode of Grumpy Old Geeks, we’re serving up a buffet of dystopia with a side of snark. First, Kuwait has finally realized crypto bros are an energy drain, not a feature. Celsius Network’s founder gets 12 years for running a “safe investment” Ponzi scheme. And in Lopez v. Apple, we find yet another reason to question Cupertino’s moral compass.

Then it’s time for a trip through the tech trash fire. DoorDash gobbles up Deliveroo, proving there’s no such thing as too many overpriced salads. Google wants your kids to befriend Gemini—because what could go wrong giving tweens supervised AI access? Tesla’s “Robotaxi” trademark gets the boot for being as generic as Elon’s pickup lines. Meanwhile, Grok strips in public, deepfake porn sites get the axe, and dating app “Raw” rawdogs user data like it’s the early 2000s internet. We also hit peak Black Mirror with brain-typed tweets, AI-resurrected relatives, and crypto kidnappers playing real-life GTA.

On Media Candy, the streaming overlords dump trailers like Halloween candy. Squid Game is back to traumatize you, Star Trek: Lower Decks keeps boldly going where no animated series should, and The Old Guard 2 teases a Theron-vs-Thurman sword fight. Plus, Apple’s UX team found the “enhance” button, Netflix wants to be helpful (lol), and Google dreams of becoming a Hollywood darling. Over in Apps & Doodads, Apple wants to stagger iPhone drops, Disney sells you a $3,000 droid with zero sass, and Smart Flowerpots are now a thing because apparently, you can’t be trusted to water your plant.

And finally, it’s time for The Dark Side with Dave, where Bittner brings us malware, click tracks, fake vocals, and the shocking truth about KISS’s lipsync disaster in Antwerp. We also dip into ILM’s jaw-dropping legacy, Star Wars’ shady back alleys, and a new Disneyland in Abu Dhabi, because nothing says “happiest place on Earth” like 120°F desert heat. All this and more, right here on your favorite snark-fueled ragecast

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Show notes at https://gog.show/696

FOLLOW UP

Kuwait cracks down on crypto miners to cut down on electricity usage

Founder of crypto platform Celsius Network is sentenced to 12 years in prison

Lopez v. Apple Inc.

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