Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family

"Couples often ignore each other's emotional needs out of mindlessness, not malice."

- Dr. John Gottman

Summary

Let's take an honest look at how communication breaks down in busy marriages and what you can do to stop it. Most couples don't ignore each other out of malice, but out of exhaustion, distraction, and rushed daily life. In this episode, we unpack why...

"Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and clings to his wife, and they become one flesh."

Genesis 2:24

Summary

In this episode, we talk about something every person longs for: belonging. At its heart, marriage is meant to be a place where you are chosen, known, and not easily walked away from. It's a home base, the one relationshi...

"Love of neighbor is a path that leads to the encounter with God… closing our eyes to our neighbour also blinds us to God."
- Pope Benedict XVI, God is Love

Summary

We begin with Love because marriage flows from our deepest identity and relationships, not just spousal dynamics. Created in the image of a loving, Triune God, we must first ask who God is and who we are in His eyes. Our relationship wi...

"Let us begin again, for until now we have done nothing," - Saint Francis of Assisi

Summary

As a new year begins, many of us focus on where we fell short instead of how we've grown. In this episode, Mike and Alicia invite parents and couples to reflect on the past year by celebrating the gains—not just the gaps—and to recognize the common traps that keep us stuck, like doing too much, be...

Summary

This episode revisits one of the most helpful and down-to-earth conversations on the Messy Family Podcast: Family Board Meeting 2.0. It starts with a simple but challenging idea. We put a lot of thought into our jobs, but when it comes to family life, many of us are just trying to keep up. Between work, kids' schedules, and everyday stress, it's easy to drift into survival mode. A Family Boar...

Summary

What's it really like growing up in a big family?

In this special Hernon kids takeover podcast, Mike and Alicia's children gather around the mic to tell the honest, funny, and heartfelt story of their upbringing. From loud dinner tables and sibling fights to deep bonds, meaningful traditions, and moments of feeling unseen, the Hernon siblings share what shaped them—for better a...

Your decisions may not always be perfect, but you can choose to make them together.

Summary

In this week's podcast, we dive into one of the most important truths for married couples: you will never make a perfect decision—but you can choose unity. Today's culture urges us to optimize everything with hacks, experts, and AI, yet the real power in family life comes from spouses acting tog...

"Hospitality and real community starts by inviting people into your messy home…"

Summary

In this episode, Mike and Alicia sit down with best-selling Catholic author Emily Stimpson Chapman to talk about Advent, Storybook for young Catholics, and the beauty of simple hospitality. Emily shares the real, lived rhythms of Advent in her home—reminding parents that peace and prayerfulness gro...

"Learning how to trust God and let go of our fears, worries, and frustrations is the best way to model peace for our children."
— Dr. Gregory Bottaro

Summary

This week on the Messy Family Podcast, we are joined by Dr. Greg Bottaro for a heartfelt and practical conversation every parent needs to hear. In this interview, Dr. Greg explains why kids are not naturally built to listen and wh...

"Baby Jesus was an amazing surprise to the world on Christmas morning, and gifts under the tree remind us of that wondrous gift each year." - Regina Doman

Summary

Mothers create the environment of the home by what we allow in our house, how we arrange our home, and where things are kept. We are teaching our children all the time, not just by what we say and do, but the home that we creat...

Summary

Are you exhausted, overwhelmed, or wondering whether you're doing anything right as a parent of little ones? You're not alone — and you're not crazy. In this refreshed and expanded episode, Mike and Alicia revisit their classic "Survival Zone" conversation with new insights from another decade of parenting and now grandparenting. They unpack why the early years are so intense, what's normal (hint: your ex...

In this honest Q&A episode, Mike and Alicia answer real questions from listeners about the struggles every couple faces – feeling distant, managing conflict, and staying united when life gets stressful. They talk about what to do when your marriage feels dry or disconnected, how to rebuild emotional intimacy, and how humility, forgiveness, and shared prayer can bring healing. With humor and wisdom from decades of marriage and mento...

Families need to disconnect from the world's pace, be present to one another and break bread together. - Bishop Thomas Olmstead

Summary

Why are family dinners so hard — and so important? In our latest Messy Family Podcast episode, we get real about the chaos of mealtime: the cooking, the planning, the juggling schedules, picky eaters, and the endless cleanup. But we also share the good n...

Summary

In this re-release of  Episode MFP191, we open up about one of the biggest challenges every couple faces—finding time for each other in the midst of busy family life. After 31 years of marriage, we've learned that love doesn't just grow on its own; it takes intention and effort because although our marriages are always Important, they are rarely Urgent. In this episode, we share our own stori...

"Being Christian is not the result of an ethical choice or a lofty idea, but the encounter with an event, a person,

which gives life a new horizon and a decisive direction." - Pope Benedict XVI

Summary

Every one of us is on a journey towards eternity.  Our life here on earth, our vocation, our careers, our relationships are all just ways that we can grow in our knowledge o...

Summary

Why are today's kids more anxious than ever before? Mike and Alicia dive into the growing epidemic of anxiety among children and teens – and how modern parenting, technology, and culture all play a role. Drawing insights from Jonathan Haidt's The Anxious Generation, they explore what happens when we overprotect kids in the real world but underprotect them online.

From overschedul...

Take your calling seriously and yourself lightly

Summary

Are you taking parenting a little too seriously? In this episode, we dive into why families need to throw off the burden of "psychological correctness" and rediscover the gift of humor. Parenting isn't a project—it's a wild, messy adventure! We'll share why secure parents can laugh at their mistakes, how to set healthy limits at ...

Summary

Parenting isn't just about being present—it's about leading with purpose because children need guidance, not just companionship. In this episode, we start by looking at some quotes from celebrity parents to examine how they are misguided. The reality is that parents are called to protect, not simply please. And we each have different roles:  fathers embodying hope and authority, mothers offer...

"The devil is afraid of a united husband and wife." —St. John Chrysostom

Summary

The family is Satan's top target because it reflects God's very nature and holds the foundation of civilization. Marriage isn't just a social contract—it's a sacrament with spiritual power, which makes it a threat to evil. The enemy's strategy is subtle: sow disunity between spouses, confuse gender roles, ex...