Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_01 (00:07):
Welcome to the
Mindfulness Exercises Podcast,
your space to deepen yourpresence, elevate your
mindfulness teaching, and embodymindfulness with confidence,
authenticity, and integrity.
Join us as we explore insightsand tools to transform lives,
(00:29):
including your own.
Welcome to the MindfulnessExercises Podcast.
My name is Sean Fargo, andtoday's episode comes from an
online meditation retreat that Ihosted a few years ago, in which
people from all around the worldcame together to meditate for
(00:51):
several days, all day, on Zoom.
And so during this onlineretreat, one of the participants
asked an important question (00:59):
Can
these kinds of non-residential
retreats be as impactful as aresidential retreat where people
are together in person, stayingin one place all day and also at
night?
(01:20):
Many traditional retreatsinvolve several days of
immersive practice in a secludedsetting.
Like at a monastery or a retreatcenter where everyone gets their
own bed, and you're basicallywith these people for several
days, if not several weeks.
(02:04):
But now, you know, in this ageof like post-COVID and
everything's online, can onlineretreats be just as powerful?
Or can retreats where people umcome together in person to
meditate together during theday, but then they go home at
(02:25):
night, can those be as powerfultoo?
Or can a day-long or just asmall weekend retreat offer the
same depth and connection andimpact?
So in this episode, I'll shareinsights on how to design
meaningful non-residentialretreats, ones where
(02:46):
participants engage deeplyduring the day, and then they go
home at night, or they log offand just kind of reconnect with
their home at night and returnthe next morning to the retreat
refreshed.
Can these kinds of retreatsoffer just as much impact?
(03:06):
Um and you know, especiallybecause these formats of
non-residential retreats can bemuch more accessible to people
who can't afford to spend timeaway from home or afford the
fees of a retreat center.
So let's dive into thisdiscussion and explore how to
(03:29):
create powerful non-residentialretreats and compare it to
residential ones.
SPEAKER_00 (03:38):
I just uh was
looking for your thought on
doing day retreats um withoutthe overnight.
So I found a fantastic spacethat is like 15 minutes from my
house.
It's everything that I waslooking for.
Um, I've never run overnightretreats before.
(03:59):
So I think for my own comfortzone and to just kind of feel
out how does this space flow andis the energy like what I think
it is, I'd like to do somethinga little bit smaller first.
So to have um like a weekendretreat that's you know all day
Saturday, all day Sunday, butyou go home at night and then
(04:21):
come back.
So um, so anyway, just lookingfor your thoughts or insights on
that.
SPEAKER_01 (04:29):
Um, well, I'm very
happy for you.
I hope it works out.
That sounds really smart to justdo a couple day longs like that,
or like a connected, you know,two days kind of connected.
I think that's that's reallysmart to try.
I think a lot of peopleappreciate being able to go
home, you know, sleep in theirown bed, you know, eat their own
(04:50):
dinner.
SPEAKER_00 (04:51):
It shifts was like
we would probably do dinner
there.
SPEAKER_01 (04:55):
Okay.
SPEAKER_00 (04:55):
Um, but just because
I've never held that or used
this space before either.
And I know it would shift thedynamic and sort of break um the
environment by having everybodysort of, you know, disband and
and then come back.
Um but I I thought it might alsobe more available to people if
(05:22):
they don't have if they've gotlittle kids, say for example, or
pets or whatever, they don'thave to have somebody looking
after them overnight.
And um so yeah, I so justlooking for if you have any sort
of suggestions and how tostructure that with that break
in between where they've gonefor the night and then come
back, and then there'll be thatthat transition period to settle
(05:43):
back in again, right?
SPEAKER_01 (05:45):
Or you know, a
sample structure that I might
consider would be, you know, inthe morning, eight o'clock, nine
o'clock, or something to welcomepeople and invite people's
voices in the room.
Like, what brings you here?
What are you hoping for?
What's your treat retreatexperience?
(06:05):
But to invite voices into theroom so we get a sense of like
how are people feeling?
What's here?
Um, I think it's helpful for ourfor strangers to get a sense of
who's here in many ways thathelps people feel safe and
connected, and then to establishsome ground rules, some, you
(06:28):
know, what is the structure,what's okay, what's not okay.
You know, we don't want peoplecounseling each other during the
retreat.
Usually, you know, we we want tocreate a safe environment for
everyone.
Um, I'm on hand to answerquestions.
If things are overwhelming,please back off and let me know,
(06:53):
or go to the bathroom, or changethe practice, you know, like
some trauma sensitivitylanguage, you know, where are
the facilities?
What's my intention as ateacher?
You know, and to speak from theheart.
I personally like togglingbetween um sitting, um,
(07:14):
sometimes with guidedmeditations where you guide it,
sometimes in silence, sometimesa like just a big mix of uh
voice and silence.
SPEAKER_00 (07:27):
It's a beautiful
space where there's loads of
nature options as well.
So that can also be umabsolutely filtered in.
SPEAKER_01 (07:37):
Yeah, and you can
invite mindful walking, maybe um
kind of giving an example ofwhat it means to do mindful
walking and like whereeveryone's standing up and um
and just kind of what does itfeel like to be standing,
(07:57):
feeling the bottoms of the feeton the ground?
Does it feel like when I putweight on my right foot, feeling
the weight there?
What does it feel like to kindof move the body in the space?
Can I keep awareness in thebottoms of my feet?
(08:17):
What happens if I walk one stepforward?
Sensing in the bottoms of thefeet, feel arched toes.
So doing kind of like a mindfulwalking tutorial, like in the
room, and then invite or oroutside the room if everyone can
hear.
Um, and then inviting Mattoutside or inside if there's
(08:40):
enough space.
Um, but yeah, you can have likea free choice time.
You can do walking, sittinginside by yourself, yoga, you
know, like okay.
SPEAKER_00 (08:52):
I know for me the
the retreats that I've been to
where they've tried to like jamso much information in, you lose
the processing time, which is sovaluable, like the like you
said, the nothing time, right?
To be in your own stillness andnot always being instructed.
Um do you have a uh like asuggested length of time for
(09:16):
something like that, like eightin the morning to eight p.m.
kind of thing?
Or like is there a standardindustry standard, if you will,
for that?
SPEAKER_01 (09:24):
Um well, like at
Spirit Rock, they're day longs
uh basically 9 to 5 or 8:30 to5, basically, partly because um
they didn't want to serve dinnerto everybody.
unknown (09:39):
Sure.
SPEAKER_01 (09:40):
Um, I mean, if you
want to have dinner there, you
can do like mindful eating ormindful sharing or reflection
and then go until until theystart yawning.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (09:55):
Um, you know, and
some places will be much more
loose and have some sort of likenot exactly like entertainment,
but something that kind of likethey have an indoor pool, they
have a a sauna, there's uhjacuzzi, like there's lots of
options to build that in, but Ijust wasn't sure like how much
(10:16):
of that do you just kind of goand you know do your own thing
for a little bit and then comeback.
Um, I guess you just kind ofhave to build it and see how it
goes.
SPEAKER_01 (10:28):
Yeah.
I mean, I I think it might youmight be iterating to sense into
what works for you and whatworks for other people.
Usually with this stage ofthings, I would um invite you to
consider, like, for you, whatwould feel like really good?
(10:51):
And you might make your ownagenda that's never existed
before.
Like, what brings life to you?
What could you see yourselfhaving fun with or feeling
really nourished by as ateacher?
Okay, you know, maybe you want alot of interaction or none at
all, or silence, or a mixture ofdiscussion, like what would feel
(11:17):
really good to you as a teacher?
SPEAKER_00 (11:20):
Okay, that's a great
way to look at it.
Thank you.
SPEAKER_01 (11:22):
Um, because if you
feel enlivened by that and
excited by it, or super likepresent with what you came up
with, people will probably feelthat and feel nourished by that
too.
Okay, without feeling like youhave to be within a certain
structure.
SPEAKER_00 (11:39):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (11:40):
I know I'm coming
from sort of a conservative
orthodox background here, but Ithink that when we're teaching,
it's important for us to feelconnected with it.
And so to kind of create like atabula rasa blank page, and like
(12:01):
what can I imagine that wouldfeel um really rewarding?
unknown (12:08):
Okay.
SPEAKER_01 (12:09):
And everyone's gonna
be very different on that based
on their experience, theirpersonality.
I would invite you to start fromscratch and throw out any rules
that you feel like you have tofollow.
Yeah, and it depends on thegoals and the intentions of the
retreat.
Um, but at Spirit Rock, youknow, I I coordinated, I don't
(12:30):
know how many day longs, likewhat you're talking about, um,
many of which were connectedfrom a Saturday and Sunday.
And I've seen teachers doextremely different styles.
Um, but um I think that what youcommented on, like with where so
much is being thrown at peoplewith concepts and teachings,
(12:50):
like it can my sense is that twodays later most people are gonna
forget 95% of what was said,yeah.
Which is why honestly, why Istarted this company,
mindfulness exercises.
It's not called mindfulnesstheory, mindfulness concepts,
yeah, yeah, it's mindfulnessexercises because I saw too many
(13:12):
day longs where that happened,where people were gonna forget
95% of what was said, but in theday longs that felt like a
retreat where there was spacefor people to be and and not
have the expectation to think ordo or talk or figure things out,
(13:37):
that's where you kind of feelthe energy ground.
And people are like coming hometo their bodies.
SPEAKER_00 (13:46):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (13:48):
And in today's
Western world, we need that.
SPEAKER_00 (13:54):
Yeah.
unknown (13:55):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (13:55):
My intention is to
create a space that's not um
like a checklist of did all theactivities, right?
Like, because that's often whathappens is like hurry up.
I found myself doing it with theteacher training.
Well, I was like, would you stoplike actually reading the
practice?
What are you doing?
Like that was like a one ofthose like, oh my gosh, what a
(14:20):
hypocrite.
But it was a huge learning curvefor me to go, oh, yes, set it up
so that you can actually be inthe experience.
SPEAKER_01 (14:32):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (14:33):
Not just outside of
it going check, check, check,
right?
SPEAKER_01 (14:36):
Right.
Totally.
Yeah, I mean, um, I've thoughtabout doing day longs like that,
um, where I have a name for it.
I've never like shared thispublicly or anything, but like I
call it just sitting together.
Nice.
And we're just sitting together.
And um I haven't done this, andI don't think I've ever seen
(14:59):
this, but like the idea is thatyou get people in a room, and
you can sit on a chair or a mator the ground or whatever, but
you're just sitting together inthe room, and that's it.
You can close your eyes or not,you can look around or not, you
know, but no one's like knittingor reading or writing.
(15:23):
We're sitting together.
And maybe, you know, as ateacher, I would say we're
sitting together.
And every once in a while, justkind of like giving voice to
what's happening.
Noticing our experience, feelingwhat it's like to be here.
SPEAKER_00 (15:47):
Nice to show up with
no agenda, yeah.
And just experience whatever itis you experience, right?
That's beautiful.
SPEAKER_01 (15:54):
And those are my
favorite teachers.
That's why I love my Taoistteacher in China.
Zero agenda.
Zero.
Like every time I'd go uh sitwith them.
You just make it up as we wewent along.
Sometimes we'd go for a walk inthe woods, sometimes we'd just
(16:15):
sit there in silence, sometimeshe'd pour tea with broken
English and talk about the mindor the heart or whatever.
There's a guy close to me namedAnam Tupton, who's a Tibetan
teacher, and he'll give bigtalks and retreats, zero
preparation, and it's beautiful.
unknown (16:37):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (16:38):
And like sometimes
he'll talk for 17 minutes about
something he's been thinkingabout, and then he'll sit in
silence for five minutes, justlooking at everybody, and
everyone just kind of sittingthere.
We don't know how long thesilence is gonna last.
It's not a meditation, he's justpause, he just stopped talking.
Like, okay, and then, but it'snot awkward, it's just
(17:01):
connecting in real time,sitting, and then 11 minutes
later, something new will pop upand it'll crack a joke, not like
sarcasm, it's just funnysomething humorous occurred to
him, and now we're all laughing.
It's like organically weavingbetween silence, you know,
(17:22):
stream of consciousness, quotingancient teachers, you know, and
it's beautiful.
And my I love those teachers.
Like the teachers who come upwith the 50 bullet point
outline, we're gonna go fromhere to here to here to here to
(17:43):
here.
Yeah, it's there's nothing wrongwith it.
I personally don't resonate withthat as much, and I know some
people do, and that's fine, butanyway, I'm just like yeah, it's
casting the process of its ownorganic nature.
unknown (17:59):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (18:00):
Totally, yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (18:01):
And that's just
being present with whatever
comes up.
Thank you for joining me in thisexploration of daylong and
weekend mindfulness retreats, orjust non-residential retreats in
general.
As we've talked about, thisformat offers a more accessible
(18:24):
and flexible way to supportpeople in deepening their
mindfulness practice while alsofostering a deep sense of
connection and presence.
If this conversation resonatedwith you and you're ready to
take your mindfulness teachingto the next level, consider
(18:44):
joining our mindfulnessmeditation teacher
certification, where you canjoin our program in an
affordable, accessible,self-paced way to certify to
teach mindfulness inprofessional settings.
You can learn more atmindfulnessercises.com slash
(19:07):
certify.
Until next time, stay present,stay grounded, and continue
showing up with authenticity andcompassion.
Thank you for listening.