Mistakes Were Made
Non monogamy for imperfect people. Hosted by a queer therapist and her husband of 15 years. Sarah & Alex share their experiences opening their marriage, and interview guests about the struggles & rewards of doing relationships your own way. Mistakes Were Made is part advice, part confession, part culture critique. But it’s all about learning from our missteps and stumbling toward liberation. Follow us on instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/. Logo design by roy franklin of the Whatever Factory - https://www.whateverfactory.org/.
Episodes
What are my boundaries? What are my needs? How do I share them with my partners? Sarah and Alex try to understand the differences between rules and boundaries, needs and desires.
Mentioned in the episode:
Glitter & Greed: The Lisa Frank Story
mistakescast@gmail.com | https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/
Logo design by roy franklin: www.whateverfactory.org
Hollywood made a movie about open relationships (sort of). We watched it so you don't have to!
Mentioned in the episode:
Splitsville | Together | Together’s free couples therapy gimmick |
mistakescast@gmail.com | https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/
Logo design by roy franklin: www.whateverfactory.org
Sarah and Jessica are fasting this week, so we’re sharing an episode that first aired in the spring of 2024. Is polyamory inherently apolitical? Is it just an excuse for rich people to avoid thinking about climate change? Did Sarah accidentally make out with a Trump supporter at the ferry dock??? Tune in to find out!
Mentioned in the episode:
Sarah and Alex talk with therapist and ‘Crush Coach’ (it’s not what you think), Calvin Burnap, about mindfulness, queerness and the gift of bad sex.
Mentioned in the episode:
The Crush Coach | The Crush Coach on Instagram | All About Love | Esther Perel | The Wheel of Consent by Betty Martin | Jenny Hayo | Dan Savage
mistakescast@gmail.com | https://www.instagram.com/mistakesca...
A mysterious green tupperware offers a portal to the past. Sarah and Alex talk about how their feelings about hierarchy, sleepovers, vetoes and more have changed over five years of being polyamorous.
mistakescast@gmail.com | https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/
Logo design by roy franklin: www.whateverfactory.org
Sarah and Alex investigate mind-blowing, legendary, earth-moving sex, to find out if such a thing actually exists, and if so, how to have it.
Mentioned in the episode:
Sexucation for Men Podcast | “Take my Breath Away” Scene from Top Gun | Partner-Specific Learning
mistakescast@gmail.com | https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/
Sarah and Alex unpack the mournful refrain: “if on...
How does death, loss and grief impact our relationships? After a year filled with loss, Sarah and Alex talk to a trauma-informed spiritual care provider about the taboos around death, and what happens to our desire when people around us die.
Mentioned in the episode:
Close to the Knives: A Memoir of Disintegration by David Wojnarowicz | Without: Poems by Donald Hall | Wayward Lives, Beautiful...
Is it you? Is it me? Are you moving to Antarctica?? In this episode we talk about how and how not to end a relationship.
Mentioned in the episode:
mistakescast@gmail.com | https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/
Logo design by roy franklin: www.whateverfactory.org
Are the same dynamics screwing up our relationships also hampering our social movements? Sarah and Alex talk to activist and law professor Dean Spade about the romance myth, capitalism and love in this f*cked up world.
Mentioned in the episode:
Love in a F*cked Up World | DeanSpade.net | The Death Panel | Movement Memos
Also by Dean Spade:
Encore episode
Romance: what does it mean?? Sarah, Alex and Jess talk about their favorite romantic movies on the hottest day of the year. And finally answer the question: what IS romance? Or, do they just come up with 5,000 new questions? Listen to the end to find out! This episode first aired in August 2024.
Mentioned in the episode:
Last episode we started to talk about race in dating, and tbh…mistakes were made. So this episode we’re doubling down! Ramsey shares his experience dating as a Black polyamorous man in Seattle, offers advice for white people dating other races, and asks us “taboo” questions about our own experiences.
Mentioned in the episode:
We had such an interesting side conversation with Reagan about her experience working with a dating coach that we had to make a bonus episode all about it.
Mentioned in the episode:
Sarah and Alex's skeptical monogamous friend Reagan Jackson is back to grill them about sex, jealousy, and whether they’re just dating other versions of each other over and over.
Mentioned in the episode:
Lissa joins the podcast to help us parse out the difference between polyamory and swinging. And Alex opens up about his not-so-hot sex party experience.
Mentioned in the episode:
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Reach out to Lissa: weekdaypineapple@gmail.co...
TMI time! Sarah and Alex work on healthy habits for disclosing info about sex and feelings in their other relationships. What’s an overshare? When is it hiding or deception? And what is the nature of truth anyway?
Mentioned in the episode:
Sarah and Alex make sense of the election results by talking about developmental stages, anti-social behavior, and oh yeah and also polyamory.
Mentioned in the episode:
Welcome to season 4 of Mistakes Were Made! Today we're asking: How much conflict should you expect in a healthy relationship? In this episode Sarah, Jessica and Alex explore how to fight better (rather than avoiding fights altogether) by understanding our internal patterns and reaction styles. Logo design by Roy Franklin: http://whateverfactory.org.
Mentioned in the episode:
Talk to us:
Which fork should you use on a first polyamorous date? Do you have to let your partner be the little spoon all the time? We pondered these and other burning questions in the Finale episode of Season Three.
Srsly though, here's the etiquette and advice we gathered for this episode, if you don't want to listen to 80 mins of our charming banter:
- Let your partners consent into information ab...
Romance: what does it mean?? Sarah, Alex and Jess talk about their favorite romantic movies on the hottest day of the year. And finally answer the question: what IS romance? Or, do they just come up with 5,000 new questions? Listen to the end to find out!
Mentioned in the episode:
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