Orbital Earthcast
After 5,000 Standard Earth Years (SEY), Orbital comes to Earth. Thank you human technology for finally becoming advanced enough for us to retrofit our file format so you can hear this. My name is Gap Storm, an extraterrestrial with command over time and space. I could have set off for the edges of the Universe to fight crime or save the innocent. Instead, I started an audio program. Enjoy!
Episodes
This is a public service announcement to any sentient beings throughout the Universe thinking about visiting Earth in the foreseeable future. Earth is closed. Gap has the details.
Earth year 2019 might have been full of large stories, but there are others that fell far off the radar. Perhaps that was for the best as you will discover in this year's Time Warp episode. Boosh, Grevlock and CB rejoin Gap to discuss why art is confusing, if aliens are obviously real and the current status of the bird revolution.
Gap might have wandered onto the set of a classic Christmas special. Gap might also regret such a thing. Let's all watch this train wreck together, shall we?
Thanksgiving is finally here and along with it comes a feast to rival all others. Will you go strictly traditional with a lobster or more new-age with a turkey? How about kicking it up a notch? Gap talks to Fry Ferrari from Stuffed! about going on a road trip to Flavor City.
Orbital returns just in time for the spookiest of seasons. But let us be proactive and fight against the spooky things armed with knowledge. Gap is joined by Lance Van Helsing from the hit paranormal investigation show Ghast Stoppers. We go in-depth into the various kinds of spectral creatures you are likely to encounter and ask if you ever really encounter them at all.
As the first episode of the new Earth year, Gap assembles the Orbital Time Warp panel to discuss the strange and sometimes unfathomable stories that happened in 2018. Be prepared to hear tales of relationship sadness, candy catastrophes, scientific studies no one asked for and animals just trying to cope. You're welcome, Earth!
It's that time of year when the world falls in love with Christmas specials, so here we are with another one. Gap tries to discover how wonderful life is when George Bailey comes on the show. So many questions to answer: Is it a wonderful life? Who names these kids? What happened to the money? What's with the raven? How about the squirrel? Did the squirrel and raven conspire to steal the money? Enjoy an exploration of such question...
Once the turkey is all gone, the time for gift shopping begins. Every year it seems harder to shop for the ones you love and tolerate. Luckily, Gap has you covered on this episode of Orbital. Flying into the studio is the one and only Bee in a Tree, a lively icon of the gift-giving season that knows exactly what you want, we think.
Also, Elf on the Shelf could not be reached for comment.
Gather round the dinner table and try your hardest not to pull a carving knife on your relatives, it's Thanksgiving. And as America prepares to celebrate this autumn tradition, likely from under several feet of snow, Gap decided to host the first Thanksgiving BEFORE the actual first Thanksgiving, thus making it the NEW first Thanksgiving. Lace up your bootstraps, it's going to be one of those episodes. To help celebrate this new f...
Since turkey is on everyone's mind this time of year, we have a whole show dedicated to the subject. To speak on the subject, Gap invited Tom, the turkey rights activist, to discuss it in detail. Some fascinating revelations and a surprise last minute guest stuff the first ever Talking Turkey segment on Orbital.
The weary world recoils as we reach the spookiest night of the year. Luckily, Gap is here to help the unfortunate souls on Earth with the help of special guest H.P. Lovecraft. Just ignore the whispers in your head and everything will be fine.
Now that we have officially entered the spoopiest season, our thoughts turn toward All Hallow's Eve. In that spirit, the one and only Grim Reaper joins Gap on the show to discuss his job and health regimen. Also, sweet scythe moves.
During the War of 1812, a lawyer named Francis Scott Key was inspired to write The Star-Spangled Banner, which would come to be the national anthem of the United States of America. But how much do we know about Key and his broadside ballad? Find out as Gap sits down with Francis Scott Key on Orbital.
Bewitched, the stunning documentary series about being a magic user in 1960s America, really brings a new light to an often overlooked demographic. But what about the non-magical among them? Ask Darrin Stephens. In fact, that was Gap's plan. Darrin addresses some of the crazy events of his life with Samantha on this episode.
Thomas Edison. Nikola Tesla. The War of the Currents (not berries). The fight over direct current versus alternating current shall be settled here. Or not. There may also be talk of aliens and ghosts. Two fascinating inventors square off on this episode of Orbital.
It makes sense that the ones who need the most advice and positive reinforcement would be the ones actively dealing with the end of the world as they know it. Luckily, Gap is here to help as he takes calls from the unfortunate denizens of doomed worlds.
After his rousing turn as a CM for Castles & Catalysts, Gap's creative streak was energized. Shortly thereafter, an idea formed to become a fantasy novelist. However, a successful career among humans will require a helping hand, namely J.R.R. Tolkien, the man who wrote the book (literally) on fantasy.
In a world flush with live plays, why not have one more? Gap pulls out the ancient roleplaying game Castles & Catalysts to flex some CastleMaster skills. In order to get a genuine human experience, your players will be some reprising guests: Moxie Havok from Moxie's Poetry Clash, Chad from Chad's Chatroom and Bill Raphus from Big Business Basics. Will any of our players survive? Will any of the lowly citizens of Illudere survive? Y...
Over time, Gap has developed a healthy fear of artificial intelligences, despite technically being one. So, inviting GLaDOS to travel from her chamber in Aperture Science to the ship was a cautious pursuit. But we did it anyways. Let's see if Gap can survive the possibility of a robot apocalypse on this episode of Orbital.
If you have a mystery worth solving, who's the first person you would call? Sherlock Holmes of course! Assuming you knew his number. Luckily, Gap has the work around of a time machine and brought Sherlock in for some mystery solving of his own. Keys shall be found on this episode of Orbital.
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