44: Division of Household Labor – Part 1 with Eve Rodsky

In this episode, Lori Mihalich-Levin and Jason Levin took a detour from their usual pattern of interviewing moms and dads in different industries and sectors to discuss an issue that all working parents struggle with - how household labor gets divided. They have created a two-part series of special guests to dive into this important, juicy, and emotionally-charged topic! 

Today, Lori and Jason are delighted to welcome Eve Rodsky to the podcast. Eve is a mom and a working parent celebrity. She is the author of the New York Times best-selling book Fair Play: A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live). She is also the author of the brand-new book, Find Your Unicorn Space: Reclaim Your Creative Life in a Too-Busy World. 

Eve is a lawyer, and she has done extensive work in family mediation, strategy, and organizational management. She is married to Seth, and they have three children. Zach is thirteen, Ben is ten, and Anna is five. 

In this episode of Parents at Work, Eve unpacks the relationship evolution that takes place in a marriage after the children come along. She shares the Fair Play origin story, explains the power of having systems in place, and plays a game with the Fair Play cards to help couples understand how baggage and assumptions make things emotionally charged. 

Tune into today’s conversation to learn about the value of systems and find out how couples can share household chores without triggering each other.

Show highlights:

• Eve talks about her first job as a bar mitzvah dancer. (4:16)
• How Eve started helping parents communicate better. (7:24)
• Eve explains why things become so emotionally charged in the home after the children start to arrive. (12:38)
• Eve plays a game with her Fair Play cards and explains what they represent. (14:10)
• Playing with the Fair Play cards helps people understand the baggage that tends to get caught up in the division of labor in the home. (23:46)
• Fair Play is an ownership mindset and a no excuse zone. Eve explains how it started to work in her home. (24:07)
• It is vital to understand the context of why people do things. (26:45)
• Why are systems vital in the home? (30:00)
• How to unlock the secret formula for boundaries, distance, and communication and start the conversation. (36:49)
• What allowed Eve to feel that she had started to make progress with issues around the division of labor in her home? (39:47)
• How to reframe or replace toxic messages and create a new way forward. (43:40)
• Eve talks about the Fair Play documentary. (48:44)

Mentioned in this episode:

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