Making Sense of "Baby Talk" in a CCPT Playroom: What It Means and How to Respond

In this episode, I answer a question from Kelli in Washington about how to respond when children use baby talk in the playroom. While it may seem like a small thing, baby talk always carries meaning in a session. I walk through three common reasons it shows up—regressive play, a bid for nurturance and safety, or a conditioned pattern—and explain how to stay attuned to what the child may be expressing through this behavior.

I also share how to reflect baby talk in a neutral, nonjudgmental way, why it's important not to correct or redirect it, and how to respond when it's difficult to understand what the child is saying. As always, our goal is to allow space for whatever needs to emerge, trusting that with time and the right conditions, these behaviors shift as the child grows through the process of CCPT.

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If you would like to ask me questions directly, check out www.ccptcollective.com, where I host two weekly Zoom calls filled with advanced CCPT case studies and session reviews, as well as member Q&A. You can take advantage of the two-week free trial to see if the CCPT Collective is right for you.

Ask Me Questions: Call ‪[phone]‬, or email: [e-mail]
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APT Approved Play Therapy CE courses: https://childcenteredtraining.com
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Common References:
Cochran, N., Nordling, W., & Cochran, J. (2010). Child-Centered Play Therapy (1st ed.). Wiley.
VanFleet, R., Sywulak, A. E., & Sniscak, C. C. (2010). Child-centered play therapy. Guilford Press.
Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge.
Bratton, S. C., Landreth, G. L., Kellam, T., & Blackard, S. R. (2006). Child parent relationship therapy (CPRT) treatment manual: A 10-session filial therapy model for training parents. Routledge/Taylor & Francis Group.
Benedict, Helen. Themes in Play Therapy. Used with permission to Heartland Play Therapy Institute.

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
You're listening to the Play Therapy Podcast with Dr. Brenna Hicks,
your source for centered and focused play therapy coaching.
Hi,
I'm Dr. Brenna Hicks,
The Kid Counselor.
This is the Play Therapy Podcast where you get
a master class in child-centered play therapy
and practical support and application for your
work with children and their families.
In today's episode,
I am answering a question from Kelli in Washington State.

(00:24):
Just about as far away from me as you can possibly get,
with the exception maybe of Hawaii or Alaska.
So,
hello to those of you on the northwest side of the states,
as I am on the southeast side of the states.
All right,
so Kelli's question is about baby talk in sessions,
and I think maybe we've kind of glossed over this a few times,
but I don't know that we've actually done any kind of deep discussion about this.

(00:48):
So looking forward to
process that together
as a,
as a second question that
was included in the email,
Kelli is wondering if we have any more live calls
coming up soon since she attended the last one.
And yes,
I am planning another live podcast soon,
so stay tuned.

(01:08):
We are actively choosing dates and I'm doing
a lot of training with Corwell right now,
so that has occupied most of my free days during the week,
but,
and I've been speaking all over the country,
so that's another occupying of my time,
but.
That's settling down probably by the end of
this month,
so we are hoping to get a date booked and

(01:29):
you all can register an RSVP and we expanded our Zoom
account
so we can have more than 100 people on the call so we can really
go big on the live calls now.
So yes,
another one is coming.
Stay tuned.
I'll be able to do Q&A and I'll record a podcast live on the call with y'all.

(01:49):
And I'll get to put faces with names and hang out with my people,
which is my absolute favorite thing to do.
All right,
so let's read parts of Kelli's question and then we'll dive in.
I've wondered if you've ever done an episode on baby talk.
I have a few kids of varying ages all the way from 1st grade through 4th grade,
which that's typically in the 6 to 9 year old range just for reference,

(02:13):
who will use baby talk in the playroom
and sometimes act helpless.
Just wondering the best way to reflect this with them,
especially if it keeps happening over and over.
Alrighty,
so let's talk through the why first.
The why matters as always.
So we need to understand what is at the root
of baby talk and there are several possibilities so we'll

(02:34):
just kind of look at them one at a time,
but there is always
need
if a child is speaking in baby voice,
baby talk,
saying baby sounds,
whatever that looks or sounds like there is always a need
that is part of the therapeutic process there.
And let me take a quick left turn as a related aside,

(02:56):
but I promise it,
it'll bring us back on track.
It's really important to realize that everything that happens in a play session.
Every word that is spoken,
every story that's told,
every emotion that's expressed,
every behavior,
every action,
every attitude,
every bit of it,

(03:17):
there's meaning in it.
Nothing is meaningless,
nothing.
And it's easy for us to just discard a story about.
Lunch in the cafeteria.
It's easy for us to just kind of blow off
a scenario that they tell us about playing
soccer with their brother in the backyard.
It's easy to kind of gloss over something that they share about their new.

(03:40):
Drumsticks that light up when they play.
But
we need to be really intentional
and acutely aware
that every single thing that happens in a play session
has meaning we can't always make sense of it.
There's sometimes no
meaning to be made on our part,
but there is meaning there.
So when a child is speaking baby talk,

(04:03):
there's something going on.
It's either a means to an end,
it's a need,
it's
an expression of something.
There's always significance,
so I wanna make sure that that is known before we kind of look at potential why.
So
when a child is speaking in baby talk.
It can mean usually one of a few things.

(04:25):
The first option is they are acting and or playing regressively.
And we know that one of the phases,
no,
sorry,
the stage.
I say them wrong,
but I know them in my head.
One of the stages
is
regressive play.
So it would make sense

(04:46):
that we're going to see regressive behavior
in the regressive stage.
So sometimes we will just watch kids
as they go through
some of that part of therapy.
The regression actually is regressing back to infantile behavior,
baby talk,
baby mannerisms,

(05:07):
sucking out of bottles,
sucking on pacifiers,
curling up and wanting to be rocked.
That's not always what regressive play looks like,
but often it is.
So we just understand that this is often a standard part of
sessions #1.
2nd option is
kids will often regress back to infantile behavior

(05:30):
because it is their understanding and awareness
of when they were at their most vulnerable
and therefore needed the most safety and love and care and protection.
So sometimes they will
revert back to that infantile state.
And we see
that it's because that is when they either felt

(05:51):
the most safe and nurtured and protected and loved
and cared for or they're rewriting their narrative and
they actually desperately need and want those things.
So if they act baby like or infantile,
someone will meet their needs.
That's another option.
Third option
is this might be a pervasive trait not just in the playroom.

(06:14):
Oftentimes if kids are speaking in a baby voice or using baby talk and play session,
it's not the only place and not the only relationship in which they do it.
So if this is a pattern of behavior,
then it's likely conditioned.
In other words,
if they speak like a baby
when they're tired,
if they speak like a baby when they're bored,
if they speak like a baby to get their way,

(06:35):
if they speak like a baby with their parents with their teacher with their whomever,
we know
that they at one point
they realized that
they got a different reaction out of people when they spoke that way.
And so now it has become a conditioned or habitual pattern of behavior,
and they're not even really necessarily thinking

(06:56):
about the fact that they're doing it.
It's just something that's established and so it emerges
just kind of almost as a default.
So those are the typical reasons.
There are more,
but those are the three most standard reasons why
you experience baby talk or baby voice in a playroom.
So then,
you said you're wondering the best way to reflect this with them.

(07:19):
Well,
we have to be really neutral in our response.
So it's really important
that we don't say.
You're talking like a baby because that has a connotation.
We don't say,
oh,
you're using baby talk.
That has a connotation.
You have to be really clear
on the neutrality of your response.

(07:41):
So,
you changed your voice.
Or oh,
you're talking differently now.
Or you said that different.
It has to be factual and neutral
in nature.
Why?
Because the child can't receive it as loaded
or critical or judgmental.

(08:02):
Because remember,
everything in a play session is
validated.
It's meeting a need for the child in some way.
So just like we wouldn't say,
oh,
you made a mess with those,
even if that was good intentioned,
even if it meant no harm.
I think most of us would realize that it's not neutral to say,

(08:24):
oh,
you made a mess with the toys.
There's a connotation there.
And it's negative
versus,
oh,
you put all of those on the floor.
It's very different.
Similarly,
we wouldn't say,
oh,
you're talking like a baby.
We would say
you're using a different voice
or you change the way you're talking.

(08:44):
See how there's so much more neutrality there.
So that's the way we're going to acknowledge that now
often what happens is when kids talk
in that regressive or infantile type of speech,
it can be hard to understand them.
So the only time that we would address the fact that they're talking in that way
is if we don't understand them.
And what that would look like is,

(09:06):
you're choosing to talk in that voice,
but I don't understand what you're saying when you talk like that.
And then they have a choice to either continue to talk in
that voice and run the risk of you not understanding them,
or they will go back to their regular
speaking voice and then you'll better understand them and
you'll say oh you chose to talk in the other voice and I understood you that time.

(09:28):
It wasn't meant to be persuasive to get them to stop talking in a baby voice.
It's just communicating that you don't understand them
and then they decide which is more important.
Sometimes they keep talking in a baby voice because that's more important to them.
But the goal is never to dissuade them from speaking that way.
The goal is never to persuade them to speak in a different way.

(09:49):
The goal is always
to have them
play and say whatever they need to.
There's always a reason behind it
and baby talk never lasts forever.
I have never once worked with a child who has gone through an entire round of CCPT
that has continued to talk in a baby voice the entire time and

(10:10):
actually it's almost always very important
and significant and noteworthy in a session
when they come in and you make a note,
oh,
they didn't talk like that the whole session.
That's a big moment.
And so we look for those marks and those shifts
as we work with the child,
they will inevitably come.

(10:30):
But you have to keep in mind there's a lot of precursors they have to have
higher levels of self-esteem they have to
build self-confidence they have to build coping,
they have to have an emotional vocabulary.
They have to feel safe.
They there's all kinds of prerequisites
before a child will stop that pattern of behavior.
So with work

(10:51):
comes those changes and then you'll see that baby talk reduce and then eventually
disappear altogether.
All right,
Kelli,
thank you so much for the question.
I hope that that was helpful.
If y'all wanna reach out to me,
I'd love to hear from you,
[e-mail].
You know how much I love hanging out with you.
You know how much I love you.
Please
be so
excited and passionate and proud

(11:14):
about the work that you do.
There is nothing like it in the whole world.
Every day I'm grateful that this is my job.
Every day I'm grateful
that CCPT exists.
Keep sight
of your why
keep sight of how much CCPT resonates with you.

(11:35):
Keep sight in the trenches and in the ditches and in the throes
of
push back and resistance and argument and all the stuff that we deal with.
I,
I was asked on a Collective or a coaching call today.
How many black eyes proverbial?
How many black eyes have you received in the 20
years of doing this when you advocate for CCPT?

(11:57):
And I was like,
oh boy,
I,
I,
I lost count.
This,
this is not easy to be all in on this model,
but it is worth it y'all,
so don't lose sight of that be encouraged,
know that you're loved,
know that you can do this,
and remember why you're doing this.
That is the most important,
the why matters,
yes,
hashtag it.

(12:18):
All right,
love y'all,
we'll talk again soon.
bye.
Thank you for listening to the Play Therapy Podcast with Dr.
Brenna Hicks.
For more episodes and resources,
please go to www.playtherapypodcast.com.