Pure Desire Podcast

In this eye-opening episode, we sit down with Tabitha Westbrook, an advocate and expert passionate about helping individuals recognize and address abuse within marriage. Tabitha unpacks the often-misunderstood signs of abuse—both obvious and subtle—and challenges the dangerous belief that “it’s not abuse unless it’s physical.” She sheds light on how emotional, verbal, and spiritual abuse can deeply impact relationships, and how the...

In this deeply moving episode, we sit down with Teresa Whiting, the author of the book Graced, to explore the powerful, often overlooked stories of women in Scripture—like Tamar and Bathsheba—whose experiences of brokenness and redemption reveal the heart of God in profound ways. She shares the personal and spiritual journey that led her to write a book she never intended to, and how God gently transformed her resistance into a cal...

In this compelling episode, we sit down with Dr. Jill Manning, a leading expert in betrayal trauma whose groundbreaking research has brought critical awareness to the emotional toll of pornography use within intimate relationships. She shares her journey into this deeply personal and often misunderstood field, shedding light on the unique dynamics of betrayal trauma and its profound impact on partners and marriages. 

We’ll discuss v...

In this essential episode, we dive into a candid conversation about the role of pastors and church leaders in responding to sexual addiction and betrayal trauma within their communities. Many leaders feel illequipped—or even fearful—of “getting it wrong” when someone discloses their pain. 

Our guest, Dr. Barbara Steffens, offers practical wisdom on how pastors can take meaningful first steps, create shame-free environments, and offe...

In this episode, we sit down with Pastor Ken Krueger to explore what it truly means to cultivate a culture of grace within the church. Pastor Ken shares his personal journey, the heart behind his ministry, and what inspired him to lead his congregation toward greater authenticity and healing. 

Together, we talk about the challenges of shifting from performance-driven or shame-based models to a grace-filled approach that emphasizes w...

In this honest and compassionate conversation, we explore the hidden struggles pastors often face—and why many suffer in silence. Our guest, Cal Rychener, unpacks the key barriers that keep church leaders from seeking help, including fear, shame, and unrealistic expectations. We look at the dangerous impact unaddressed struggles can have on both the pastor and the church, and the steps leadership can take to build a culture of proa...

In this special episode, Nick Stumbo and Ashley Jameson sit down to share the heart behind their new book, Hope, Healing, and Freedom. Written from their own journeys through pornography addiction and betrayal trauma, this book offers a deeply personal yet practical roadmap toward lasting recovery.

They discuss why telling their story together matters, the reasons pornography has become such a widespread issue—even in the church—and...

In this vital and eye-opening episode, we speak with Hannah Ashwell from QuitPorn Faith about the complex, often misunderstood topic of sex addiction within the Church—especially when it involves individuals who have offended or are at risk of offending. Hannah shares the most common misconceptions churches hold and how these can hinder true healing and safety.

We explore how faith communities can create cultures of openness and acc...

In the raw aftermath of betrayal, survival mode often takes over—leaving clarity and stability out of reach. In this episode, Eileen Fagan shares the three critical tools every betrayed spouse needs to integrate quickly in the early days post-discovery. We explore why these tools matter, what “integration” looks like when trauma is fresh, and how they can offer safety and emotional grounding even when everything feels shattered. 

Ei...

The day of discovery—when a partner finds out their spouse has been viewing porn—can feel like emotional devastation. In this powerful episode, we dive into the six most important steps betrayed partners should take in the aftermath, including reaching out for support, setting healthy boundaries, and allowing space for emotional chaos. 

Our guest, Heather Kolb, sheds light on why the pain of discovery runs so deep, how to create a S...

The first 60 days after discovery or disclosure are some of the most overwhelming—and critical—moments in the recovery journey. In this episode, we unpack why this window matters so much and how to navigate it with clarity and purpose. 

Our guest and clinician for Pure Desire, Josh Andrew, shares the top three tools every individual should begin using right away: the Recovery Action Plan, the Escape Plan, and the Three Circles. You'...

Getting caught looking at porn can be an emotionally overwhelming experience, filled with shame, confusion, and fear. In this episode, we sit down with Jason Karsten to explore the six most crucial steps someone should take immediately after discovery—from seeking support and establishing boundaries to giving themselves grace and beginning the healing process. Jason shares practical advice on taking responsibility without being con...

In this episode, Debby Flanagan shares valuable insight into what comes after the first year of recovery—a season often marked by both growth and new challenges. As the initial intensity of group begins to settle, many wonder: What’s next? Debby offers guidance on how to discern the right next step—whether it’s repeating a group, starting a new workbook, or stepping into leadership. She unpacks what it means to have a long-term vis...

In this insightful episode, Tyler Chinchen unpacks the importance of knowing when group alone isn’t enough—and how seeking additional support can actually deepen the healing process. While recovery groups offer connection, structure, and hope, some seasons call for more personalized help.

Tyler shares the key signs that someone might benefit from working with a counselor, coach, spiritual director, or mentor—and breaks down the uniq...

In this honest and hope-filled episode, Ashley Jameson shares wisdom from her own recovery journey and years of walking with others through the group process. Together, we explore the reality that healing in a group isn’t a straight line—it’s filled with both highs and lows. 

Ashley highlights the moments that bring encouragement and motivation, as well as the common challenges that can cause doubt or discouragement. She offers prac...

In this episode of our series, The Ideal Group Member, Rich Moore joins us to talk about what it really means to “start group well”—and why those first few weeks can make all the difference in the healing journey. He unpacks the key mindsets and attitudes that help set the tone for lasting growth, along with common mistakes to avoid when beginning a Pure Desire group. 

From the importance of consistency to the challenge of building ...

In this transformative episode, Harry Flanagan unpacks the vital role of a spiritual growth plan in long-term healing and freedom. He shares why a clear, intentional path isn’t just helpful—it’s essential, especially for those navigating recovery. What does a spiritual growth plan actually look like? Is there a rhythm that fosters consistency without becoming rigid? Harry addresses common gaps in spiritual development, particularly...

In this episode of the Foundations of Freedom series, Heather Kolb joins us as we dive deep into the battlefield of the mind—where true healing begins. From a neuroscience perspective, we explore how the brain processes sexual brokenness and trauma, and why understanding this is key to lasting transformation. Many people believe they’re just “wired this way,” but what if you could actually retrain your brain? 

Heather unpacks the di...

Sobriety isn’t just about stopping a behavior—it’s about building a new way of living. In this powerful episode, Stuart Blade dives into what it truly means to establish sobriety and not just temporarily abstain. He shares practical steps for protecting your progress, limiting the damage of past behaviors, and preventing future setbacks. 

For those just starting out, Stuart offers insight into the mental and emotional hurdles of ear...