SCP-613 - "Wonder Bread!"

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"SCP-613" by Shue Donham, from the SCP Wiki. Source: https://scpwiki.com/scp-613. Licensed under CC-BY-SA.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:05):
This is data Specialist Standers of the Data Redundancy Project
SCP six thirteen Object Classes EUCLID Special Containment Procedures Foundation
assets are to monitor all reports of anomalies similar to
SAPs six thirteen one and investigate if necessary. All instances
of SEP six thirteen are to be kept in safe

(00:27):
items storage in Research Sector ninety six. All individuals found
to have knowledge of SEP six thirteen are to be interviewed,
dosed with Class bmnestics, and released. Instances of SP six
thirteen one are to be interviewed upon creation and contained
in a climate controlled environment for observation, experimentation, and research

(00:49):
until such times they cease to be viable due to spoilage.
Instances of SEP six thirteen one in containment are to
be tagged with stickers listing their names into the temperature
at las which they rose. Description SEP six thirteen is
a piece of redacted brand pad paper showing a handwritten
recipe for a normal loaf of wheatbread and the words

(01:11):
wonderbread recipe. Please refer to this paper for optimum results.
There are at present ten instances of SEP six thirteen
in foundation custody. All instances of Sep. Six thirteen are identical.
The recipe is completely identical to other common recipes for
regular loaves of wheat bread. However, when a loaf of

(01:32):
bread is created by a subject who is only following
directions from SCP six thirteen or memory of it without
consulting any other sources, the loaf of bread will become
an instance of SEP. Six thirteen one. Sep. Six thirteen
one are loaves of bread created while following the directions
on SEP. Six thirteen. Instances of SEP. Six thirteen one

(01:54):
can vocalize through unknown means and achieve self locomotion by
sliding across and rotating surfaces, and are capable of sensation
and perception of their environment. All instances of SEP. Six
thirteen one are fully sapient and have distinct personalities and
identities unique from other instances Sep. Six thirteen one that

(02:15):
rise at normal room temperature will have average mental states
and intelligence as expected of adult human beings. However, instances
that rise at non room temperatures will have chances of
developing mental disorders and or increasingly non average IQ, with
greater chances resulting from greater deviation from room temperature. There

(02:36):
are currently no identified factors that appear to control whether
the IQ will increase or decrease. Instances of SEP six
thirteen one separated by slicing or tearing where the mass
of the separated segment is greater than fifty grams will
form disparate identities distinct from the parent instances of SEP
six thirteen one. Instances of SEP six thirteen one produced

(02:59):
in the s us banner have been observed to engage
in erratic movements and vocalizations indicative of physical pain. SCP
six thirteen one are just as vulnerable to spoilage and
other forms of damage as regular loaves, and will lose
all anomalous properties when either completely spoiled or destroyed. All
instances of SAP six thirteen one do not correspond to

(03:21):
any individuals listed in any database within Foundation Access D
class Personnel. Fed instances of SP six thirteen one report
a taste virtually identical to normal whitebread, but often express
discomfort at the instance's vocalizations during consumption. Instances of SEP
six thirteen have been sporadically appearing internationally iterative once every

(03:44):
five to seven months. Operations are ongoing to investigate if
there is any individual or organization actively producing or spreading
SEP six thirteen recovery. SEP six thirteen was first observed
during a baking fare in Wisconsin, and where one baker
was reportedly selling living bread to customers, prompting MTF redacted

(04:05):
to take action and retrieve the object, interrogate the person
producing SEP six thirteen one, and dose all involved with
Class bmnestics. Since then, more instances of SCP six thirteen
have appeared internationally in possession of various individuals with avid
interest in baking. All individuals in possession of sp six

(04:26):
thirteen instances have refused to reveal where or how they
acquired them or claimed to have no knowledge of such.
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