SCP-622 - Desert in a Can

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"SCP-622" by Spaztique, from the SCP Wiki. Source: https://scpwiki.com/scp-622. Licensed under CC-BY-SA.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:05):
This is data Specialist standers of the Data Redundancy Project
SCP six twenty two Object Classes EUCLID Special Containment Procedures.
All cans and containers of SEP six twenty two are
to be immediately transferred to Site sixteen. The formula for
SEP six twenty two must be contained from the public
by any means necessary. Any commercial trade of products containing

(00:28):
SCP six twenty two should be documented and preferably intercepted
before delivery. Any persons or organizations in possession are to
be taken in for questioning handling. It will require seal
proof gloves, hand lotion, and at least one canteen of
water per personnel present. In the event of a containment breach,
the immediate area affected is to be quarantined for no

(00:49):
less than twenty four hours and hosed down with regular
water shortly after a dundum six twenty two to one.
In light of tests six twenty two to one through
six six twenty two three, all future testing of SCP
six twenty two must take place outside of Site sixteen's
air circulation system. A dundum six twenty two two. SEP

(01:10):
six twenty two is not to be used outside under
any circumstances. Additional containment procedures are only available to security
level four personnel and above as per protocol. Redacted description.
SEP six twenty two is the chemical composition Data Expunged,
also known as redacted, developed by the redacted chemical company

(01:31):
under the trade name Desert in a Can. SCP six
twenty two was originally marketed as a security aid for
large businesses to incapacitate intruders in a similar vein to
tear gas or pepper spray. According to the chemical company,
SEP six twenty two also doubled as a cleaning agent
and insecticide, but due to its hazardous nature, the company

(01:51):
was shut down before any more products of this nature
could be manufactured. As of redacted date, there are at
least redacted documented cancers Desert in a Can remaining, most
of which are still in possession and use by the
following companies redacted. According to the directors, one layer of
SP six twenty two is applied to hallways during a
break in or robbery. When applied, SEP six twenty two

(02:14):
becomes odorless and colorless. Upon application, all moisture in the
immediate area is absorbed by SEP six twenty two, creating
an easily cleanable salt like crust over the applied areas
identified to be the compound's sodium chloride, magnesium sulfate and redacted.
When SEP six twenty two is exposed to organic life,

(02:35):
the immediate effects are dehydration, dry eyes, and profuse sweating,
which is quickly absorbed by SP six twenty two. Other
effects include a significant drop in blood pressure, increase in
heart rate, dizziness, and chills. For more information, see test
logs six twenty two three. According to the can's warning label,
it dissipates after twelve hours, but according to test six

(02:59):
twenty two one, it can last up to twenty four
to thirty six hours. Tests six twenty two two and
six twenty two three show that SCP six twenty two
will only dissipate in twelve hours when redacted Security levels
three and up. Refer to testlogs six twenty two two
and six twenty two three. Testlog six twenty two one

(03:20):
inorganic testing of SCP six twenty two to determine shelf
life of chemical compound, data expunged in an isolated environment.
Procedure SP six twenty two applied in isolated hallway and
viewed through remote monitoring devices. Moisture measured and monitored by
electronic instruments for a control hallways KS six and K

(03:41):
seven were also monitored for humidity content, averaging at twenty
percent relative humidity results in twelve hours. Relative humidity around
SEP six twenty two remained unchanged at zero percent. Despite
the label's claim of dissipating in twelve hours, the area
did not run in humidity. It took nearly twenty six

(04:02):
hours elapsed before the relative humidity rose to one percent.
The relative humidity stayed at one percent for nearly an hour,
more slowly rising to two percent after the twenty seventh hour.
SCP six twenty two did not completely dissipate until thirty
five hours and twenty eight minutes. The final relative humidity
capped at nineteen percent for the next four weeks and

(04:26):
remained there as of writing. It is undetermined if it
is a result of SEP six twenty two removing all
excess moisture from the construction phase of Site sixteen, or
if there is a chemical component that does not dissipate.
Test logs six twenty two two inorganic testing of SEP
six twenty two to determine shelf life of chemical compound.

(04:46):
Data expunged in a controlled environment procedure before SEP six
twenty two was applied In the hallway, four buckets of
water equivalent to the water content of an average human
being were placed in a forementioned hallway. As with test
six twenty two one, the hallway was isolated, applied with
SCP six twenty two and viewed remote monitoring devices. Moisture

(05:10):
measured and monitored by electronic instruments for a control always
K six and K seven were also monitored for humidity content,
averaging at twenty percent relative humidity results. In twelve hours,
all four buckets of water were completely dried up. The
relative humidity stood at twelve percent until twenty five hours

(05:30):
had passed, finally capping at around nineteen percent after thirty
five hours elapsed time. When applying significant figures to the
control rooms, the average relative humidity has dropped from twenty
point two four percent to twenty point one seven percent.
It is unknown whether this is directly a result of
SCP six twenty two Site sixteen's air system or combination

(05:52):
of the two test logs six twenty two three Organic
testing of SCP six twenty two to determine shelf life
of chemical compound data expunged in a controlled environment procedure
two D class personnel were requested. Subject to D two
five four Mail Caucasian twenty four years old eighty seven
kilograms one hundred sixty nine centimeters was given a canteen

(06:15):
of water prior to entering the hallway. Subject D two
fifty five, Mail Caucasian forty six years old ninety two
kilograms one hundred seventy two centimeters was not given any
water prior to entering the hallway. As with tests six
twenty two one and six twenty two two, the hallway
was isolated, applied with SEP six twenty two and viewed

(06:36):
through remote monitoring devices. Moisture measured and monitored by electronic instruments.
For a control halways K six and K seven were
also monitored for humidity content, averaging at twenty percent relative
humidity results. Almost immediately after entering the affected area, both
subjects complained of exhaustion. Subject to D two five four

(06:58):
immediately began drinking from mis capen. Subject D two fifty
five attempted to struggle D two five four over the canteen,
but found himself too weak to fight. D two fifty
five starts visibly hyperventilating around eight minutes elapsed to time.
D two fifty five collapses at ten minutes elapse time
and does not get up. Subject D two fifty four

(07:19):
notices a visible mist coming off his canteen, reports his
water as evaporating and needs more agents sent in to
give him more water. Reports on how dry the air is.
Subject D two fifty five's flesh is visibly redacted at
fifteen minutes elapse time. Subject to D two fifty four
runs out of water, complains about being hungry. The agent

(07:40):
returns with multiple bottles of redacted brand sports drink, a
bucket of water, and several granola bars. Subject to D
two fifty four seen dunking his head into the bucket
of water before pouring it on himself and consuming sports
drinks and granola bars. The water on D two fifty
four's hair and clothes immediately dry up at twenty six
minutes lapse time. Subject D two fifty four collapses from malnutrition.

(08:04):
For the next ten hours, the bodies of D two
fifty four and D two fifty five continued redacted. Finally
reaching the skeletons, the clear salt like crust from the
evaporated moisture had turned to a mix of dark red
and brown. The average relative humidity remained at fourteen percent
until thirty five hours elapsed time, averaging at nineteen percent.

(08:25):
When applying significant figures to the control rooms, the average
relative humidity has dropped from twenty point one seven to
nineteen point ninety six. Note. I think it's safe to
believe that SEP. Six twenty two may have some sort
of chemical component that still lingers long after SEP. Six
twenty two has dissolved. For future reference, let's do all

(08:45):
testing outside of Site sixteen circulation system test LOGS six
twenty two four organic testing of SCP six twenty two
to determine shelf life of chemical compound in an outdoor environment.
Procedure SEP six twenty two will be applied to a
small patch of grass on the Site sixteen testing biosphere
seven and viewed through remote monitoring devices. Moisture measured and

(09:10):
monitored by electronic instruments for a control testing Biosphere two
and one were also monitored for humidity content averaging at
sixty eight percent and seventy three percent relative humidity respectively.
Results data expunged see an end of six twenty two two.
Security levels three and above refer to documents six twenty

(09:30):
two A and six twenty two B. Test Logs six
twenty two four. Organic testing of SEP. Six twenty two
to determine shelf life of chemical compound redacted five personnel
only in an outdoor environment procedure SEP. Six twenty two
will be applied to a small patch of grass on
the site sixteen testing Biosphere seven and viewed through remote

(09:52):
monitoring devices. Moisture measured and monitored by electronic instruments. For
a control testing, Biosphere two Ti Quo and one were
also monitored for humidity content, averaging at sixty eight percent
and seventy three percent relative humidity respectively. Results. Within the
first minute of exposure, the humidity of biosphere seven dropped
to zero percent, forming a brown crust along worse six

(10:16):
twenty two was sprayed. Within two minutes of testing, all
flora within biosphere seven had shriveled up, turning into a
salt like compound. Similar to SEP. Six twenty two. All
of the mud within biosphere seven turned to dry cracked dirt.
After three minutes, security notified testing staff that the surrounding
plant life of Site sixteen was beginning to turn brown

(10:37):
outside of Biosphere seven. Despite the airtight nature of the biosphere,
Site sixteen staff dispatched to surround the area and stop
SEP six twenty two from spreading. After five minutes, SCP
six twenty two has covered over point zero one seven
square kilometers, spreading at an estimated rate of point two
kilometers an hour or roughly three meters per minent. Site

(10:59):
six sixteen proceed to dump water on the surrounding area
to stop SEP six twenty two from spreading. SAP six
twenty two quickly absorbs all water and continues spreading. Site
sixteen Command level staff immediately requests to enact Protocol Gray.
Five approves Protocol Gray enacted. Security levels three and above
refer to six twenty two B. Security levels four and

(11:22):
five refer to Protocol Gray Containment procedures. A message from
five to general staff, as many of you are undoubtedly aware,
SEP six twenty two has broken out of containment at
Site sixteen. While this does pose a possible threat leading
to an eventual NK class Gray GOO End of the
World Scenario Foundation staff are doing their best to contain

(11:42):
the problem. Site sixteen staff have enacted Protocol Gray to
slow the rate of SEP six twenty two spreading and
are currently looking into how SP six twenty two was
able to breach the biosphere testing facility. To help alleviate fears,
here are a few facts that we would like you
all today. All of the biological SEPs at Site sixteen

(12:03):
have been secured and transferred away from the spread of
SEP six twenty two. Space will be slightly more cramped,
but the situation is under control and all of the
SEPs are in proper containment. As of July eighteenth, twenty twelve,
SEP six twenty two has only spread a total of
less than three square kilometers and the rate has slowed
thanks to Protocol Gray. At the rate it's going, it

(12:24):
will only be able to overtake Site sixteen in seven years.
Even then, we will still have plenty of time before
it reaches any urban areas. SP six twenty two can
be slowed down by water, especially fluoridated water. As long
as we keep pumping water to Site sixteen, it will
buy us extra time until we can think of a solution.
We have a list of all of the known companies

(12:45):
that are still in possession of SEP six twenty two
and are actively seeking to contain every last canister before
they can be used. Lastly, I know some of you
are shaky about Protocol Gray. It may come back to
bite us, but I'd much rather worry about an XC
class end of the World event in a few hundred
years than an NK class Gray Goo end of the
world event in the next few weeks. We'll deal with

(13:07):
that then, but for now, Protocol Gray is buying us time.
As long as we end a Protocol Gray in the
next ten years, I don't think there's anything we'll need
to worry about. I will notify everyone once SCP six
twenty two has been contained and whin Site sixteen staff
discover why it was able to breach containment. Carry on
O five. You can get all my episodes add free

(13:33):
at patreon dot com, slash f f O D pod