[ENCORE] Ep. 111: Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World

Join Debbie's TILT Parenting book club (Spring, 2022).

In this episode, I'm talking with Debbie Reber, creator of TiLT Parenting, the host of the TiLT Parenting Podcast, and the author of Differently Wired: Raising and Exceptional Child in a Conventional World. While this book was written mainly for parents that need extra support, I think it will resonate with all parents of all kids.

Big Ideas

• Every child deserves to be understood and accepted for who they are.
• We are all wired differently. Some differences are more visible than others.
• Each kid needs different tools to thrive in life and we can help them figure out what they need for their individual journey.
• When parents and children communicate their needs and explain their differences to others, people are more understanding and accepting.
• 3 Key Take-Aways:
  • Find a community and resources
  • Find the right kind of support (parent coach, couples counselor, online communities)
  • Embrace and accept kids' strengths; teach them to articulate their needs.
• Gifted kids also have special needs that can be addressed and supported in schools and at home.
• As a parent, set aside what you think your child's (social, academic, physical) life should look like, and respect your child's own timeline.

Quotes

Audrey: "Sometimes people are just kind of under the radar. Maybe they aren't diagnosed with something, but their parents just sort of know that they don't move through life the same way that other people do."

Debbie: "Many of the kids in my community may not have a formal diagnosis but a lot of them are extra sensitive, have heightened anxiety and are more tuned in and the world is an intense place for them."

Debbie: "I wanted to cast a wide net and include any sort of narrow atypicality because there are so many of us. But when we stay in our little buckets, we don't get to tap into the collective and recognize the power in our numbers and why things really do need to change."

Audrey: "Sometimes our biggest challenges become our biggest gifts."

Audrey: "You did this journey together with your son, learning how to help him navigate the world and then how to help you navigate the world as a parent. You figured out how to embrace your son and all of his strengths and his uniqueness and help him become his best self. And you helped him be able to articulate to the world who he is and what he needs."

Audrey: "I've always loved delving into all the personality type inventories that just help us learn how the way we see the world or react to things is different from other people and being a little more empathetic and understanding of that as opposed to thinking it's wrong."

Debbie: "We're really looking at this person as an individual human on their own incredible journey. I think it can be really hard when we're just kind of on this treadmill of life, doing what everybody else is doing. Take a conscious step back and say, 'wait a minute--who is this kid and what do they need to do to really thrive?'"

Debbie: "It's not easy to take that pause and to really shift your focus."

Audrey: "Even for people with different interests, the concept that there is one path is so flawed. Kids who aren't academically inclined or sch