Tapping Q & A - Getting the most out of tapping and EFT

The "fear of missing out" (FOMO) isn't just some clever internet meme.

FOMO is a real issue and it impacts most of us.

Because of the internet and social media, we are constantly aware of what is going on everywhere. This creates a number of problems.

First, it creates a sense of compare-anoia where we are judging ourselves against everyone else.

Then, after we feel bad for not having what others have, we try to fill the gap in our...

Whenever I hear the Andy Williams song "It's the most wonderful time of the year," I am immediately transported to my childhood, driving around town at night in the snow looking at all of the holiday lights.

But the reality is, even in the best of times, the holidays can be overly busy and demanding.

For many, it is actually a time of stress, overwhelm, and grief. In the last week alone, I tapped with seven different clients around...

I often joke with my clients and students that a part of all of us would like total, instant and eternal transformation every time we sit down to tap.

It is good that we have high standards and want only the best.

BUT, as we know, it doesn't always happen that way. A part of us also understands that healing is a process and sometimes it is healthiest and best for us when it unfolds slowly in order to take deep root.

When thinking a...

As humans, one of the things we are very good at is naming everything that is wrong with our lives.

On one level, this is a useful tool because it allows us to identify what we would like to change.

The problem is that just because we know what we don't want, does not give us clarity about what we do want. Or, if we have clarity, it doesn't mean we know how to create it.

Whenever we experience a lack of clarity around our goals, or...

One of the biggest obstacles to tapping is knowing where to start. This is especially true when we know we are feeling something, but we can't quite put our finger on what that is.

We might feel heavy or unsettled, or there is just something there at the edge of our consciousness.

When this happens it can be hard to tap. We might start tapping and then peter out because it is hard to focus on something vague.

This week in the podca...

One of the hardest phrases to say outloud is "I love and accept myself".

The reason this phrase is so hard to say outloud is because we know ourselves. We know our failings. We know our mistakes. We know where we have fallen short.

To say "I love and accept myself" feels like I am also accepting all of those failing and imperfections.

Recently I was talking to my friend Brad Yates and we were talking about why self acceptance is so...

One of the healthiest changes that has happened in the tapping world over the last decade is that we spend less time talking about the one-minute or one-session miracles.

This sort of instant transformation does happen and it happens regularly. It just doesn't happen all the time!

The reason I am happy that we no longer talk in those terms is because it creates unrealistic expectations for tapping. Assuming that tapping always work...

As a tool, tapping is such a powerful way to tune in to our emotions. Feeling, processing, and moving through emotions is a key part of the healing and transformational experience.

At the same time, there is a certain capacity to our emotional experience. Feeling deeply is a powerful part of transformation until it becomes too much.

I have often heard my clients describing this experience like trying to drink from a fire hose. It i...

You know you'd benefit from some tapping, so you sit down ready to get into it. You want it to work…but as soon as you start, your mind goes blank. You freeze because you can't think of the right words to use. After a few minutes, you give up, thinking you must be doing it wrong.

This happens to everyone, even experienced tappers, and I want to reassure you that it does not mean you are bad at tapping.

Why Your Mind Goes Blank<...

brutal truth nobody talks about in the self-help world: The healing and transformational work never ends. Every breakthrough just reveals a fresh layer of issues to be worked through.

It would be wonderful if one day I was done, but I am open to the fact that it's an ongoing process.

For me, the single toughest place in the transformational and healing process is when I feel like I am starting over again. And calling it tough is an...

When you have been through something hard, such as grief, trauma, or a season of disconnection in your life, it is easy to forget what wholeness feels like. You lose touch with the part of you that still knows peace, still feels love, and still remembers who you were before the story changed.

In this episode, I talk with Sarah Tobin about what it means to remember yourself. Not in a vague or inspirational way, but as an intentional...

When you were first taught how to tap, more than likely you were asked to tune in to your issue in some form or fashion. You might have been asked to describe where you feel it in your body, what it reminds you of, or to rate its intensity on a 0–10 scale.

These are all great ways for us to focus our attention, which improves the value of each round of tapping.

While these ways work well, they all assume that we can identify an iss...

I know this sounds strange, but you're not afraid tapping won't work. You're actually afraid it might.

In this episode, I dig into a truth that has come up repeatedly in my conversations with clients and students. Even when we know how powerful tapping can be, something inside stops us from doing it as often as we could. That something, I've come to realize, is fear of change itself.

It's not that we don't want to heal and to exper...

One of the most common questions I receive is "Can we use tapping to help the animals we love?"

The answer is a resounding YES!

But in order for tapping to work well, we first need to know the most useful approach.

Tapping for our animals isn't just a matter of looking at our animals and tapping. While that can be useful, there are better ways to get results.

This week in the podcast, I am going to share with you the surprising pla...

One of my favorite questions when interviewing someone about their tapping journey is, "If you could share one piece of advice with your younger self, what would that advice be?"

For some reason I was reflecting on that question recently, not for someone I was interviewing, but for myself.

The piece of advice that I would give to Gene-the-beginner-tapper would be to go more slowly.

This week in the podcast, I share four different w...

Finding a balance between taking responsibility for our lives and taking too much responsibility for what is going on is a tricky matter.

Taking too much responsibility may seem like a silly notion, but it can happen in many ways.

One of these ways is when we refuse to allow ourselves grace or forgiveness. We recognize that we have made a mistake and then, whether consciously or unconsciously, we decide that we are not allowed to g...

One of the ideas that really makes my clients bristle is the possibility that their self-sabotaging behaviors are guided by their system's well-meaning intention to keep them safe.

They question, "How is it possible that my subconscious mind thinks it is trying to keep me safe when all it is doing is making my life harder?"

That is a great question because it feels counterintuitive that our desire to be safe is actually holding bac...

For some issues, tracking progress is simple.

I can tell if my desk is less cluttered, if I can lift more weight while working out, or if I am making more sales in my business.

That is because these examples are measured in hard metrics, or in other words, cold, hard numbers.

Changes that are measured in soft metrics are more difficult to track. For example, it is much harder to quantify growth in my self-esteem or confidence.

Much...

One of our biggest struggles in creating transformation and change in our lives is those moments where we know WHAT to do, we know HOW to do it, and we know WHY it is valuable to take an action…and yet we just don't.

It is obvious what the next step is and for some reason we don't take it.

Then, as a bonus, we beat ourselves up for not taking action. So as well as not moving forward, we feel bad for letting ourselves down.

This wee...