Tapping Q & A - Getting the most out of tapping and EFT

For the 2024 Spring Energy Event I was asked to give a reflection on what I have learned in my personal and professional transformational journey.

For me, the measure of the value of transformation is seen in how our life is different. What do we believe that is different? How do we feel that is different? In what ways are we asking in new ways?

Because this has been my focus, I am supremely interested in the resistance to change. ...

One of my favorite ways to learn is by listening to the questions others ask.

When I am asking questions I am bringing my experience and preconceived notions to the questions. This is a useful way to learn, but sometimes I am too close to my own experience to ask the most useful question.

When someone else is asking a question they are often asking a question I never would have thought of. This gives me a chance to ponder the quest...

Goals are a powerful tool in helping us to move forward. They give us clear direction, they help to create clarity for our best next steps, and they serve as a measuring stick for us to evaluate the action we take.

Goals are great!

Except when they aren't.

Sometimes goals can feel like a constraint, homework, or something we "have to do". When this happens, they become more of a hindrance than a help.

This week in the podcast we ex...

One of the phrases I spend a lot of time tapping on with my clients is the idea that "time is a zero sum game". What I mean by this phrase is that if you are doing one thing you can't be doing anything else.

This means everytime we choose to do something, we are choosing not to do anything else.

Because this is the case it is very easy to judge ourselves as we look at our past choices. When we look to our past, not only are we able...

When most of us learned the basics of tapping, one of the first bits of advice we received was to "be as specific as possible when you are tapping."

Sometimes this is straightforward; the issue is singular and clear, so we know exactly where to start.

At other times, our issue involves multiple emotions, and it is hard for us to tell where one emotion ends and the next begins.

When this happens, the advice to "be as specific as pos...

Tapping is one of those tools that is simple to understand and explain, but that doesn't mean it is easy to do.

The biggest hurdle most new tappers (and even experienced tappers) experience is not knowing what to say when tapping.

When we first learn tapping we are guided by a skilled practitioner or teacher who seems to come up with perfect tapping phrases without effort. We can't wait to add tapping to our daily practice.

Then we...

On March 3rd, 2009 the first episode of the Tapping Q & A Podcast went live...and within 90 minutes that same episode was taken offline because of a major editing error.

Fifteen years (and 600+ episodes) later, the show is still going. In that time, the podcast has featured wisdom and insights about tapping, healing and transformation from some of the brightest minds in change work.

The podcast has been downloaded millions of times...

Tapping is something that is simple to explain, but isn't necessarily easy to execute.

We know that tapping success comes from tuning in to the issue and then tapping on the points.

But tuning in to an issue can be tricky, particularly when we are in a heightened emotional state.

When I am struggling to define what I am experiencing, I reach for a simple tool that I call "self-coaching". It is something you already know how to do, ...

None of the success that I have enjoyed in my life is something that I have accomplished on my own.

My past and present are filled with inspiring teachers and mentors, and I often reach out for help when I am working on a project or task.

I have achieved so much more and my life is immeasurably better because of these mentors.

That said, I don't always have access to my mentors. They are busy, I can't get hold of them, and some of ...

Tapping is such an easy tool, that at a moment's notice we jump right in and start tapping.

Even though this is the case, I think it is important that we don't rush in too quickly. To help me get the most of a tapping session I have created two checklists that I read through before I start tapping. There is one checklist for when I am doing personal tapping and another for when I am working with a client.

These lists are designed t...

One of my favorite parts of tapping is the fact that when we sit down to tap, not only do we get a chance to clear and release issues but we also have the opportunity to discover other issues that are deeper under the surface.

The cliche that is most often used (because it contains truth) is doing this work is like peeling an onion. As we remove one issue we find another one underneath.

This is powerful because it gives us access t...

Over the last four or five years I have had a major shift in how I think about tapping. This shift is moving from the idea that tapping is an approach, to tapping being a tool.

This realization has not only changed the way I think about tapping, it has also changed the way I think about transformation as a whole.

No two rounds of tapping are the same. When I say that, I don't just mean I change the words I am using or I change the ...

One of the very first ideas I was introduced to when I was learning the basics of tapping was something called a "tailender".

Tailenders are the little (or big) pieces of resistance that speak up when we are tapping.

For example I could tap on the phrase "I am going to lose 25 lbs to start the year." The moment I finish saying that phrase, my subconscious mind speaks up with "No you are not. You failed before and you are going to f...

My daily tapping practice is NOT designed to make my life go perfectly. Instead, it is designed to build my emotional resilience.

What I mean by this is that the more emotionally resilient I am when something goes wrong, either it doesn't impact me and my progress OR it has minimal impact on me.

Even when we spend time working on building our resilience, it doesn't mean that we are impervious to taking emotional hits. Sometimes, re...

I have spent a lot of time thinking about what it means to live an authentic life. One of the ways I would describe this sensation is being comfortable in my own skin.

And when I say I don't just mean comfortable as in not in pain, but comfortable in a way of luxuriating in something I was made for.

It is much like a beautifully made pair of leather shoes that have been broken in to fit us perfectly.

In 2022 one of the presenters a...

It would be very easy to assume by looking at a group of migratory birds, like ducks, flying in a V-Formation to assume the bird in the front in the leader.

But if you watch the flight for any length of time you will notice that the leader changes quite frequently.

The bird in the front is not the leader, but instead the one who is working the hardest as the other birds fall into the slip-stream. The slip-stream is the space create...

When working with clients, it is important to listen closely to the words they use and pay attention to everything they are saying.

When I do this, I am not just listening to the meaning of the story my clients are telling, I am also paying particular attention to the words they use.

This is because we respond to the world emotionally based on the way that we describe it, not how it is.

A simple example of this is if someone said, ...

I love goals.

They are a powerful way to focus attention and to help us stay motivated to keep taking action.

At the same time, the moment we create a goal, we also create expectations. Naming something that we want to happen means opening ourselves up to possible disappointment if we do not achieve the goal.

This week, as we start the Mini-Tool Series, I share with you a brief phrase I add to the beginning of all my goal statement...