Every time you “win” an argument as a leader, you actually lose influence.
In this episode I reveal why arguments sabotage trust, how to spot the ego traps that bait you in, and a proven redirect playbook to turn conflict into collaboration.
You’ll leave with scripts, questions, and practical tools to lead with calm authority instead of loud authority.
What you will learn:
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Why winning debates is always a leadership loss
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The hidden costs of ego-driven conversations
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How to spot your physical and emotional triggers
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A question-led redirect playbook to cool down heat
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Real-world examples for peers and direct reports
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Why silence and curiosity are the most underrated leadership tools
Timestamps
00:00 – Opening hook and show intro
04:10 – Why arguments destroy trust and long-term influence
09:00 – Ego traps and the hidden cost of short-term wins
14:25 – Common missteps: interruptions, showdowns, public arguments
19:30 – Why compliance is not buy-in and the myth of silence
24:20 – Personal story: healthy debate vs. workplace arguments
29:00 – Physical tells: signs you’re about to take the bait
33:40 – Redirecting with questions instead of counterattacks
38:05 – Silence, mirroring, and shared goals as leadership tools
42:00 – Wrap-up, checklist, and closing actions
Links:
📘 Download the Free eBook: The Roadmap to Difficult Conversations
🌐 Explore Our Leadership Programs: rdltraining.com
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