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October 8, 2025 20 mins

In this second episode of Heather's three-part series on how to advocate for yourself at work, she dives into one of the most transformative steps: asking for what you want out loud and with delight.

Building on the foundation from Part 1 ("Know What You Want"), Heather explores why choice and energy are everything when it comes to advocating effectively. Asking for what you want isn't just about words—it's about how you feel when you ask. From her years as a trial attorney to her experience coaching clients, Heather reveals how shifting your beliefs can transform your results, your confidence, and your career.


In this episode, you'll learn:

  • Why Manifesting Isn't Enough – You can journal, visualize, and set intentions—but to get results, you must also advocate out loud to the person who can give you what you want.

  • The Hidden Cost of Hinting – How implying your desires (instead of saying them) leads to resentment, and how to break that pattern.

  • The Energy of Asking – Why your energy speaks louder than words, and how delight, curiosity, and confidence attract what you want.

  • The BEAR Formula – How your Belief, Energy, Action, and Result connect—and how changing your belief changes everything.

  • The Belief Triangle – A powerful framework for building unshakable confidence: believe yourself, believe in yourself, and believe you can help.

  • Real Talk from the Courtroom – Heather's story of how asking out loud (and with delight) changed her career and her results.

Resources & Links:

📘 Free Download: Companion Guidebook-How to Advocate for Yourself at Work
📚 Advocate to Win – Heather's book on mastering the art of self-advocacy
📖 The Lion Tracker's Guide to Life by Boyd Varty – as mentioned in this episode
🌐 The Elegant Warrior – Visit elegantwarrior.com for more resources

In this episode:

[00:00] Welcome back: Step two of self-advocacy
[01:47] Why "asking out loud" is a choice—and how to make it
[04:08] The difference between manifesting and advocating
[06:33] Why implying what you want leads to frustration
[08:55] The danger of resentment when you don't ask directly
[10:31] How your energy reveals your belief
[13:39] The BEAR Formula: belief → energy → action → result
[16:02] Choosing beliefs that lead to confidence and delight
[17:40] The Belief Triangle: building your foundation of self-trust
[18:29] What's next: Step three—Mastering the Art of the Ask

💬 Quote of the Episode

"Your energy is your belief made visible."


Connect with Heather:

 

The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in ob

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