I was listening to Ray Edwards recently where he was sharing on his podcast 10 Uncomfortable Truths About Me. As he, Sean, and Tiffany were getting ready to sign off, he said something that I loved. Some of the things he shared in that episode (#399 if you want to listen) were going to clearly separate his people from those who are not his people. He was talking about distinctives, calling attention to what makes you and me different.
Too often, we forget this principle. You aren't meant to be a perfect fit with everyone you encounter. You know that I regularly refer to you as unique. There's something special and different about you that won't resonate with everyone you meet.
Being all things to all people doesn't work – there's a tribe, a group who gets you. Those are the ones you have to find and plugin with…deeply. You have to be okay with that. You have views, opinions, and interests that will separate as well as attract. These unique identifiers may even cause others to work against you. Don't worry about separating yourself and identifying as different. This is how it should be.
What are your distinctives? Lean into them. They not only shape you, but they also pull in (or push out!) others as you find, build, and connect with your tribe. I think there are challenges with words like "tribe." Sometimes it sounds exclusionary to me and the reality is you are excluding people when you are being honest about who you are because you and your message won't connect with everyone you contact.
So here are some distinctives about me.
First, I'm a Christ-follower. I would hope that in every single thing I say and do, that you see or hear Jesus in it. Part of the danger of telling you this is that you assume I'm some kind of religious nut job. Some of you are already certain that I am. I'd like to think that I'm not religious at all and instead value a sincere relationship with Jesus. I mean this from the bottom of my heart, not preaching at you, Jesus has changed my life.
Second, I had a HUGE fascination with trucks when I was young. There were truck drivers on both sides of my family. I grew up shifting gears for my Uncle Wayne as he delivered fuel between Denver and Greeley, Colorado. And it consumed me. I was forever building trucks out of Legos and drawing them no matter how poor of an artist I was. When I drew them, they came to life for me. And trust me, if you have never been in the cab of a truck, it is an exhilarating experience.
The highlight of my young life was getting to go in the truck with my Uncle Larry and my cousin Larry Jr to Grand Island, Nebraska. That memory is only outdone by getting to ride in the truck with my hero, my cousin Doug Steinbecker, from Greeley, Colorado out to Portland, Oregon.
I was hooked. It ran in my blood. My Uncle Larry and Uncle Dale owned a very successful trucking company that they started in Greeley, Colorado called Steinbecker Brothers. They started with one truck, then two, then three. At one point, they had more than 300 trucks and 500 trailers.
I worked hard from the time I was young. I mowed lawns as a pre-teen and not only paid for my part of the equipment but also paid for the dirt bike that I bought with my own money.
When we moved to Greeley, I got my dream job! Working in the wash rack for my uncles at their trucking company. Literally, I was driving trucks pulling trailers before I was driving a car. It was crazy and I loved every moment.
But like all glamorous things, the shine can wear a bit and expose some of the more challenging realities. Truck driving is a very hard life and owning/running a trucking company is even more difficult.
Fortunately, my parents watered a seed of interest in computers with a massive investment in the mid-80s to buy an IBM Portable PC and dot matrix printer. As a result, that paved the way for me to find a career in technology. But things don't always go as planned.
The third distinctive that is different about me is that I was nominated to attend the U.S. Naval Academy by Senator Hank Brown in Colorado. In part because of all the diesel smoke that I inhaled, I had no desire to attend the Naval Academy. I wanted to go to the Air Force Academy.
It was my job as a young adult male to make questionable decisions, so instead of pursuing the Naval Academy, I entered the workforce right after high school. I was working full time in my early 20s living in north Denver when I decided to go back to school and get my degree. I was married with two kids before completing that degree in 1999. It took me almost eight years to get it done, but I didn't have any student loan debt when I finished.
I can tell you that I worked extremely hard for that piece of paper. And I'm forever grateful for my employer at that time who paid most of my tuition as long as I maintained my grades. Ginger and the boys were so patient with me.
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