Hosted by Dr. Sarah Hensley, Specialized Social Psychologist, Attachment Theory Expert, and Founder & CEO of The Love Doc Relationship Coaching Services with Co-host Raina Butcher, Owner/CEO of Joyful Consulting, LLC.
Welcome to "The Love Doc Podcast" Season II, where Host Dr. Sarah Hensley and her co-host Raina Butcher dive deep into the intricacies of love, attraction, attachment, relationships, and self-awareness. Dr. Hensley brings a wealth of knowledge and experience to help listeners navigate the complexities of modern romance. In each episode, Dr. Hensley tackles burning questions about love, relationships, and the mind’s complexities, drawing from her psychological research, real-life experiences, and her own individual expertise, to provide insightful perspectives and practical advice.
Episode 3, Season II | "Spiritual Intimacy: The Missing Link in Modern Romance"
In this deeply honest and soul-stirring episode of The Love Doc Podcast, Dr. Hensley and Raina peel back the layers of what it truly means to be intimate—not just physically, but spiritually. In a world that often hyper-focuses on sexual chemistry and physical connection, they invite listeners into a conversation that challenges the status quo: that spiritual intimacy may be the true foundation of lasting love. With their signature blend of clinical insight, lived experience, and heartfelt faith, the hosts unpack why couples today are more disconnected than ever—despite being more sexually “liberated”—and how spiritual intimacy may be the missing link we’re all searching for.
Drawing from Dr. Hensley’s personal walk with God and the spiritual bond that laid the groundwork for her own marriage, she shares how emotional and sexual intimacy became truly fulfilling only after she and her husband connected spiritually. Raina adds perspective on how her own partnership was radically transformed when she and her husband began prioritizing a higher purpose and shared values above all else. They candidly discuss how true spiritual intimacy starts with your individual relationship with the divine—however that may look for you—and expands outward into how you love, serve, and connect with your partner.
They don’t shy away from the controversy, either. Why is it that so many modern couples resist bringing God or spirituality into their relationships? Is it fear of judgment, past religious trauma, or a misunderstanding of what "spiritual" even means in the context of love and sex? Dr. Hensley and Raina explore the resistance to spirit-centered connection and offer a reframed understanding of spirituality—not as a rigid doctrine, but as a living, breathing connection to purpose, vulnerability, and sacred partnership. They boldly affirm that for them, and countless others, God is the center of their love stories. As the Bible says in Ecclesiastes 4:12, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
This episode offers practical and inclusive ways couples can cultivate spiritual intimacy—regardless of religious background. Yes, that might mean praying or reading scripture together, but it could also look like meditating side by side, having purpose-driven conversations, serving others together, co-creating goals aligned with shared values, or holding space in silence during moments of pain and doubt. It's about nurturing the soul of your relationship. Because sex, when detached from a sense of deeper meaning or higher connection, can feel empty or misaligned. But when intimacy is built on a spiritual foundation—rooted in mutual reverence, intention, and transcendence—it becomes something sacred. Tune in for an episode that may just change how you view intimacy forever. Whether you’re single, dating, or married, this conversation is a call back to the deeper connection you were created for, a spiritual one!
Tune in to "The Love Doc Podcast" every Tuesday morning for candid conversations, expert guidance, and a deeper understanding of life, love and relationships in the modern world. To see all of Dr. Hensley’s services please visit the links below and follow her on social media.
PROMO CODE FOR OUR LISTNERS: Use LOVEDOC27 to receive 27% off any of Dr. Hensley's courses or her Hybrid Group Coaching Program.
Patreons link: patreon.com/TheLoveDocPodcast
Dr. Hensley’s Hybrid Group Coaching: https://courses.thelovedoc.com/group-coaching
Book one on one with Dr. Hensley or one of her certified coaches: Virtual Coaching
Purchase Dr. Hensley’s online courses:
Welcome to "The Love Doc Podcast" Season II, where Host Dr. Sarah Hensley and her co-host Raina Butcher dive deep into the intricacies of love, attraction, attachment, relationships, and self-awareness. Dr. Hensley brings a wealth of knowledge and experience to help listeners navigate the complexities of modern romance. In each episode, Dr. Hensley tackles burning questions about love, relationships, and the mind’s complexities, drawing from her psychological research, real-life experiences, and her own individual expertise, to provide insightful perspectives and practical advice.
Episode 3, Season II | "Spiritual Intimacy: The Missing Link in Modern Romance"
In this deeply honest and soul-stirring episode of The Love Doc Podcast, Dr. Hensley and Raina peel back the layers of what it truly means to be intimate—not just physically, but spiritually. In a world that often hyper-focuses on sexual chemistry and physical connection, they invite listeners into a conversation that challenges the status quo: that spiritual intimacy may be the true foundation of lasting love. With their signature blend of clinical insight, lived experience, and heartfelt faith, the hosts unpack why couples today are more disconnected than ever—despite being more sexually “liberated”—and how spiritual intimacy may be the missing link we’re all searching for.
Drawing from Dr. Hensley’s personal walk with God and the spiritual bond that laid the groundwork for her own marriage, she shares how emotional and sexual intimacy became truly fulfilling only after she and her husband connected spiritually. Raina adds perspective on how her own partnership was radically transformed when she and her husband began prioritizing a higher purpose and shared values above all else. They candidly discuss how true spiritual intimacy starts with your individual relationship with the divine—however that may look for you—and expands outward into how you love, serve, and connect with your partner.
They don’t shy away from the controversy, either. Why is it that so many modern couples resist bringing God or spirituality into their relationships? Is it fear of judgment, past religious trauma, or a misunderstanding of what "spiritual" even means in the context of love and sex? Dr. Hensley and Raina explore the resistance to spirit-centered connection and offer a reframed understanding of spirituality—not as a rigid doctrine, but as a living, breathing connection to purpose, vulnerability, and sacred partnership. They boldly affirm that for them, and countless others, God is the center of their love stories. As the Bible says in Ecclesiastes 4:12, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
This episode offers practical and inclusive ways couples can cultivate spiritual intimacy—regardless of religious background. Yes, that might mean praying or reading scripture together, but it could also look like meditating side by side, having purpose-driven conversations, serving others together, co-creating goals aligned with shared values, or holding space in silence during moments of pain and doubt. It's about nurturing the soul of your relationship. Because sex, when detached from a sense of deeper meaning or higher connection, can feel empty or misaligned. But when intimacy is built on a spiritual foundation—rooted in mutual reverence, intention, and transcendence—it becomes something sacred. Tune in for an episode that may just change how you view intimacy forever. Whether you’re single, dating, or married, this conversation is a call back to the deeper connection you were created for, a spiritual one!
Tune in to "The Love Doc Podcast" every Tuesday morning for candid conversations, expert guidance, and a deeper understanding of life, love and relationships in the modern world. To see all of Dr. Hensley’s services please visit the links below and follow her on social media.
PROMO CODE FOR OUR LISTNERS: Use LOVEDOC27 to receive 27% off any of Dr. Hensley's courses or her Hybrid Group Coaching Program.
Patreons link: patreon.com/TheLoveDocPodcast
Dr. Hensley’s Hybrid Group Coaching: https://courses.thelovedoc.com/group-coaching
Book one on one with Dr. Hensley or one of her certified coaches: Virtual Coaching
Purchase Dr. Hensley’s online courses:
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:11):
Welcome to the Love Dog Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
I'm your co host Rena Butcher here with our host,
doctor Sarah Hensley, the owner, founder and CEO of the
Love Dog Relationship Coaching Services.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Hey, hey, it's Capital Friday.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
It is. It's feel good Friday.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
It's your favorite. You're always like feel good fright, Friya
is that what you say?
Speaker 3 (00:30):
Yeah, Frye.
Speaker 4 (00:31):
That's why I got my I need a Diet Coke
shirt on, and I brought a diet coke with me
because even though it's terrible for you, it's so good.
Speaker 3 (00:38):
I'm gonna drink it. It is so good.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
That's all I wanted yesterday.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
It was a fountain diet coke, but specifically from McDonald's.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
They have the best.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
We don't endorse McDonald's, but you're free endorsement.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
For diet coke is the bomb.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
What what makes it?
Speaker 3 (00:53):
I don't know. All their fountain drinks are so good.
Speaker 1 (00:56):
I'm like it should be illegal, Like it's like crack.
I mean that stuff is.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
I'm addicted to diet coke.
Speaker 4 (01:02):
It's bad, and you know, I'm trying so hard, just
like one a day, and then I'm trying to replace
it with other stuff too, and for a long time
I was off of it, but we all like years
I was off of it. Yeah, then I married. My husband.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
Does he love dick?
Speaker 3 (01:16):
He loves die coke too.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
There's something about the burn I know that goes down.
Speaker 4 (01:21):
Your throat because I was addicted to it in college
and graduate school, like saying it, studying, I would drink
like a case.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
I had a roommate that was addicted to diet coke too,
and so I am. In college, I was definitely.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
Addicted to diet coke.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
But every once in a while, I don't know, it's
just like this comfort thing I just want, specifically a
fountain like the can doesn't do it for me.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
You see, I'm a can. I'm a cold can girly.
I don't really like ice as much. I mean, I
will do a fountain. My husband loves fountain drinks, but
I will prefer the can.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Yeah, well instead of diet coke. What you really should
be drinking is armor. And if yes, you should and
if you want to try armor, we are big, big
advocates for art.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Yes, it's changed our gut health.
Speaker 4 (02:05):
For sure, specifically because I read some research that diet
coke kills the gut bacteria.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Oh, I believe it.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
It like kills all the good gut bacteria.
Speaker 4 (02:14):
And I'm like, okay, well I'm drinking my armor. Yeah right,
hopefully help my gut.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
Yeah, And it definitely helps with I think drinking your
water if you're someone who has difficulty getting your.
Speaker 4 (02:25):
Water, because I like flavor, so I want a little
flavor in my water.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
So the armor is just the perfect amount of flavor.
Speaker 4 (02:31):
It tastes delicious and it absolutely has helped my gut
and I think just my overall energy levels as well.
In one supplement design to help with your gut, your skin,
your hair, immunity, everything. So please visit Armora dot com
and use code love doc and for fifteen percent off
(02:52):
if you are a first time purchaser.
Speaker 3 (02:54):
Yes, thank you all.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
Only for first time purchasers.
Speaker 2 (02:57):
But anyway, so we love arm Room, We love Die Cocon.
That's not what this episode is about. This episode we
are still in our a sexit intimacy series. This is
episode three of season two, which is spiritual intimacy, the
missing link in modern romance.
Speaker 4 (03:17):
A lot of people say, don't talk about God on
your podcast. We don't want to hear about God. Well,
then guess what this podcast is not for you because
sometimes we are going to talk about God because God
changed my life. It's my dang platform, and I'm going
to talk about God when I want to talk about God,
because I will never deny my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, never.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
And so maybe this is an episode that if that's
not for you, you can just skip it.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
Just skip it, no harm, no foul.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
Or maybe if you feel uncomfortable at the thought of
this episode, maybe that's even more reason.
Speaker 4 (03:47):
Yeah, maybe God's like going, Hey, maybe you think things
about me that are not true. Maybe your view of
me and my character are not true because flawed humans
who are influenced by the enemy have in some way,
shape or form or made you feel uncomfortable.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
That is not God.
Speaker 4 (04:03):
God is love, only love, all love, all the time.
There's nothing else that is made up of God.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
Like God is love and he'll change.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Like I get goosebumps when I think about it and
talk about it because.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
The profound ways that he can change your life.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
Yeah, like you just if you.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
Just give him, if you just let him in.
Speaker 4 (04:25):
Yeah, because I don't like religion. I am not religious
at all. I am a follower of Christ and Christ
set three rules, Love God, love your neighbor as yourself,
which yes, implies you need to love yourself.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
So how is that bad?
Speaker 4 (04:44):
Right?
Speaker 3 (04:45):
Right?
Speaker 2 (04:46):
I don't know, right, And I mean, speaking specifically on
this episode, I really.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Do think that. And I don't have a ton of
experience on.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
This because obviously you know, Josh and I have been
together on five years now, But the dating scene, specifically
when you're trying to look for a partner, I think
that there's a big missing link. Let's not again taking
religion out of it, but like with just like the
spiritual warfare that people are in and trying to navigate
(05:18):
the dating world, Like it just has to be so
difficult to be someone who maybe is in the dating
scene and is a follower of Christ and like trying
to navigate that. I just I don't envy anyone, right situation.
Speaker 4 (05:36):
Yeah, I mean, Donald and I started dating about four
years ago, and it was such a match because we
were so equally yoked spiritually, because we both kind of
came from that deliverance place of like, okay, we take
Ephesian six twelve seriously, like this is not a battle
(05:57):
in this life against flesh and blood. It is a
against good and evil, right, and that we want to
be on the side of good and evil looks like
a lot of things that people deal with every single
day that they don't even realize is demonic and it
is coming from the enemy. And it is the wish
and will of the enemy to put those thoughts in
(06:17):
your head and to carry out his evil wishes like bitterness,
like rejection. I mean, rejection is idolatry. It's the severing
of the first commandment. It's putting someone else on a
pedestal above God, right, because God never rejects us, and
so it is not loving to God to participate in rejection.
(06:38):
You know, jealousy, envy, accusation against others. There are so
many ways in which we can fall victim to the
enemy's desires for us to carry out all of the
bad in the world. And you know, God is the
fruit of the spirit love, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness,
(06:59):
self control.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
Yeah, and when you have those things inside your your
romantic relationship or any relationship really, I mean, it just
kind of catapults you to this place of higher success.
And you know, I think putting God first in your
relationship is really the ultimate way to have a lifelong,
loving marriage and relationship.
Speaker 4 (07:21):
Absolutely in my opinion, right in my opinion, because love
conquers all things. That's biblical. True love casts out fear.
That's biblical. And I think so much of what I
see in my practice in terms of relational trauma, relational struggles,
the root is spiritual.
Speaker 3 (07:41):
Do I have you know?
Speaker 4 (07:42):
And what's interesting is that psychology and Christianity almost completely align.
Like whatever psychologists claim that they said. First, I actually
kind of in the Bible most of it right, in
terms of stabilization of our mental health and our well
being spiritually, all of that can be found in pretty
(08:03):
much Proverbs, right, It can all be found there.
Speaker 3 (08:08):
And when we.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
Live our life according to the fruit of the spirit
and what God sees love, as we experience the full
extent of love, we really do. And so many clients
in my practice are struggling with that peace, And of
course I don't bring it to them.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
If they don't want it.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
We can stick with the psychology if that's what they're
comfortable with. But if they were able to put God first,
and not only in their own relationship with the Lord,
but the marriage relationship and placing that in God's hands
and placing God at the center of that. There's actually
a study that shows that the divorce rate of couples
(08:51):
that pray together every day is less than seven percent,
when we have a national divorce rate that is approaching sixty.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
So think about that. Can't be a coincidence.
Speaker 4 (09:05):
And I don't think it comes from people thinking, well,
once I'm married, like you know, God says I can't
get divorced.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
I don't think it's that.
Speaker 4 (09:13):
Yeah, I think that when you're praying with each other
and you're praying for each other, God hears that and
he blesses that, and he provides that protection and that
covering over your marriage because you're asking him to. We
have to remember that we have free will, and we
can ask God for things, very specific, very specific things,
(09:36):
and you know, it might not always look like we
think it should look, but God does answer prayers and
he does provide protection. He can't protect us from our
own free will and the free will of other people
because He granted that to us without limitation. And sometimes
we'll engage in our own free will to align with
the enemy, and a lot of people do this in
(09:57):
their marriage.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
Yeah, And I want to be clear for our listeners,
Like there's a difference, right, there's a difference between emotional
intimacy and spiritual intimacy. And so I think like for
our listeners, just to line it out and make it
really clear, Like again, in your opinion, what does spiritual
intimacy look like?
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Yeah, I mean you.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Said a little bit about it, right, It's couples that
pray together day, It's couples that you know, like, this
isn't about sex per se, this is the same. Yeah,
this is about connecting spiritually and allowing God to be
the force in your relationship.
Speaker 5 (10:33):
Right.
Speaker 4 (10:33):
Well, I think that you know, emotional intimacy is definitely
a gateway for spiritual intimacy because you can't be spiritually
connected without being emotionally connected. And I think it's emotional
connection through things like patience and humility and you know,
(10:55):
repentance towards each other, right, which is what we talk
about in terms of repair in our relationships.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
We have to have accountability.
Speaker 4 (11:04):
You can't really be accountable if you're not humble enough
to admit that you've done something wrong or that you've
hurt your partner in a way. Even that you might
not understand, right. And God is pushing us to have
forgiveness instead of resentment. He's pushing us towards being humble
and having humility. He's pushing us towards being patient, He's
pushing us towards being honest with one another. In honesty
(11:29):
really comes through true, deep vulnerability, and so emotional intimacy
kind of bridges the gap and is the gateway towards
spiritual intimacy, which, in my opinion, spiritual intimacy is when
two spirits really align in love, with God at the
center of that, with faith in Christ, in my opinion,
(11:50):
at the center of that. And so it's trying your
best to love in a christ like way, in the
way that Christ loved us.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
And why do you think it's missing so much in
modern romance specifically like in today's world. I mean, there's
a plethora of.
Speaker 4 (12:05):
Things, oh gosh, so many things. First and foremost culture,
and what is so hard and what so many of us,
even myself having the platform that I do struggle with,
is that what is supposed to be loving and socially
acceptable in the world is not actually aligned with what
God says is loving.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
Can you give an example.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Oh gosh, okay, how do I do this without getting canceled?
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Okay, don't worry about I know we have to worry
about and can get canceled.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
We don't want to get canceled, but I don't want
to deny God either. Right.
Speaker 4 (12:43):
So accepting everything isn't necessarily loving.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
Right.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
So there are things within people's lifestyles or choices that
I don't think we have to accept tolerate. Yes, I
do not believe in hatred of in any way, shape
or form, and I do believe that part of love
(13:13):
is willing to have tolerance and acceptance of everyone. But
we don't have to have acceptance of that behavior in
our own life, nor do we have to step up
and like protest for it or say you know, no,
everybody should be allowed to do whatever they want. I mean,
(13:35):
I guess there anybody's allowed to do whatever they want.
But does God see that as good? No? So there
are things that I think are influencing our ability to
have spiritual intimacy based upon what's happening in our culture.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
Right.
Speaker 5 (13:53):
So you did a great job there, okay with specific
And I also believe you know, a sin is a
sin is a sin as a sin is a sin,
and people are wrong for pointing out specific people with
specific behaviors and being like, nope, you're wrong, right, right, No,
this is about in all totality.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
We're all sinners here, Oh my gosh.
Speaker 4 (14:14):
Yes, So someone over here that's in bitterness is just is,
you know, is sinning and we're not necessarily picking on them.
And I think that that's where religiosity comes in when
we have like quote rules, right.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
I think God's standards.
Speaker 4 (14:28):
Are love God, love your neighbor as yourself, but that
does not mean that we have to stand up and
accept or.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
I don't know what the right word is I'm looking
for here. I guess promote is the word.
Speaker 4 (14:43):
I'm looking for every lifestyle under the sun, right, But
also take the log out of your own eye. That's
really important. I don't think God likes hypocrites, and I
don't want to be one. So my place is not
to judge someone's lifestyle. It's not to call someone out
for their lifestyle, but it is to say, is your
(15:03):
lifestyle honoring God? Nobody does completely unless you were Jesus Christ.
But I think the point of it is to try
to make your life as representative of what God sees
as good as possible, and I have faltered and I
still struggle.
Speaker 1 (15:21):
Absolutely.
Speaker 4 (15:22):
Psychologists call it your shadow traits, right, and I have
some shadow traits. My shadow trait is the villain. I've
talked about this, right, We've talked about this before. It's
like the bitterness for people that have hurt me and
wanting to seek revenge or wanting to one up. I
(15:42):
think there's my shadow trait is pride, you know, like
wanting to be like, no, you know, look how hard
I've worked and I built myself up from nothing and
I have this huge platform, and like if your life sucks,
well you didn't.
Speaker 3 (15:54):
Work hard enough for you.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
You know.
Speaker 4 (15:55):
That's my shadow side. But that's from the enemy, you know.
Speaker 3 (15:59):
And that's where.
Speaker 4 (16:01):
I don't want to necessarily accept those things about myself.
I need to recognize them and that they're there. And
I'm not going to apply shame to it, because Christ
died to rid us of shame.
Speaker 3 (16:15):
But what I am going to do is I'm going
to pray really hard about that.
Speaker 4 (16:17):
I'm going to see the enemies work in that and
do everything I can to take spiritual authority over it
and reject it when I catch it.
Speaker 3 (16:25):
Yeah, do I get stuck in it sometimes and in
progress so hard.
Speaker 4 (16:31):
But in terms of our relationship in our marriage, we
can get stuck in those things in our marriage, like
being stubborn, being prideful, rejecting humility, rejecting intimacy, you know,
through avoidance or disengagement, when that's not how God loves us.
He never rejects us, He never leaves nor forsakes us.
(16:54):
Now that's not to say that God and Jesus actually
had some good boundaries. Boundaries can be loving by not
enabling people to hurt you in evil ways.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
Well, I mean God has boundaries, right, because he gives
us free will. He definitely free will is a boundary.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
It is.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
It is.
Speaker 4 (17:11):
He's saying, I'm not going to make you a robot
that just loves me because I'm some narcissistic being that
has to be loved. He's saying, I want you to
choose to love me, And so he's saying that also,
I want you to choose to love your spouse.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
Yeah, so what would you say, you know, for maybe
a couple who's craving more spiritual intimacy, like where's a
good place to start, you know, because I know a
lot of people like the church, for example, cure, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (17:37):
The scripture, reading God's word. You can't know God if
you don't read his word. And I'm faltering on that too.
And it's like again, I go through phases where I'm
on it and I'm deep in the word and I'm like,
you know what, yes, I am living this every day, right,
And then there are times where life gets so busy and.
Speaker 3 (17:57):
I'm like, I haven't been in the word.
Speaker 4 (17:58):
Yeah, But then I noticed this real direct correlation between
that and my level of happiness, my experience of joy,
how patient I am with my children and my spouse,
and my ability to live the fruit of the spirit. Yeah,
it's it's true.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
It's very true.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
I notice it in my own life too, like when
I'm really committed to, you know, my Sunday Bible study
or really just being in church. And I know, like
church can be somewhat intimidating for some people, but for
me personally, I think, you know, the times that Josh
and I have gone together, it's been this really connected space.
(18:37):
And you know, I also think that you know, your
church can really be wherever you choose it to be
you know, it can be.
Speaker 4 (18:44):
We are the church, right, right, the body of believers
is the church. You don't necessarily need a building for that.
You just need people gathering together, supporting one another for
God's mission.
Speaker 2 (18:58):
And you can feel close to God. And many places
I feel closest to God, you know, like when I'm
in nature, and when Josh and I are in nature together,
it's a very spiritual experience for us. And so that's
always been something we've really connected on. And that's what
I think is important for our listeners to know, is like,
spiritual intimacy doesn't have to be what religion lines it
(19:19):
out to look like, right. It can look like a
lot of different things, And it can look like you know,
you and your partner, you know, taking a trip together
and you know, detoxing from your phones. Right Like, these
are ways that you can spiritually connect with each other. Yes,
And and you know, obviously for us specifically God.
Speaker 1 (19:42):
And you know Jesus is a part of that.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
But everything is welcome here, you know, we welcome that,
and so we just you know, we want everyone to
know that, even if you've already turned us off because
you don't want to hear.
Speaker 4 (19:55):
Right, right, And like I said, I want to be
really clear, I am not naming specific sins, pointing out
specific sins because I think that is so harmful. It
is so harmful it pushes people away from God. If
you believe that God has this finite set of rules,
(20:17):
right and you, you will never meet the metric because
how much how granular can you go in those rules?
Speaker 3 (20:25):
Like where's the where's the line? Right?
Speaker 4 (20:27):
So if you think, like, for example, drinking alcohol is okay, well,
then where's the line between when it's drunkenness and it
becomes sinful?
Speaker 2 (20:35):
Right?
Speaker 3 (20:35):
Is it when you get a tiny bit of a buzz?
Is it? You know? True? Like fallen down drunk? Like,
where's the line? Right?
Speaker 4 (20:40):
That's why we can't point at somebody and be like
your your lifestyle is is sinful? No, the way to
go about it is to say, look.
Speaker 3 (20:52):
Here's what love is.
Speaker 4 (20:53):
Here's what God says are the paths to less suffering
in this life. And if you give your life over
to him and you allow him to guide you in
that way, he will guide you in the way that
He wants to specifically shape you and mold you to
carry out your mission here on this earth. So I
(21:15):
don't want anybody to feel judged or think that I'm
pointing at them and saying this is unacceptable or not unacceptable.
We all do things that are unacceptable in God's eyes,
which is why we have Jesus Christ, because none of
us will ever meet the mark. God's standard is perfection.
None of us will meet it, which is why Jesus
came and died for us. Because if you start pointing
(21:37):
fingers that, well, you do this, or you do that,
or you do this and you do that, we get
in big trouble and we lose the message and then
God can't work right. But I do think culture promotes
a lot of demonic and a lot of evil and
a lot of you know, and a lot of people
think I'm talking about sexuality or something like that. I'm not.
(22:00):
I'm talking about like demonic representations of like you know,
with violence and bigotry and all of those things.
Speaker 3 (22:13):
Those are evil things.
Speaker 1 (22:15):
Yeah. Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (22:16):
I want to for the couple specifically where one partner
is maybe more spiritually further along than the other and.
Speaker 3 (22:27):
They want us all the time in life practice, they
want to.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
Pull the other partner into a more spiritual experience.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
What's advice you would give to that couple.
Speaker 4 (22:37):
Live and love in the most christ Like way possible
and demonstrate to your partner what Christ's love really looks
like in action.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
Yeah, because.
Speaker 4 (22:50):
You can tell them about it, you can bring him
to church. But we learn through experience and we relate
to each other through experiences, and so they need to
experience your christ like love, right, So be humble, be kind,
be patient, listen, take accountability, show them your faithfulness and
(23:13):
your trust in God. Like talking about specific sins, fear
is one of the in my opinion, one of the
worst sins out there. And I struggle, I still struggle
with it because fear is the opposite of faith. And
God said three hundred and sixty five times, and I
don't think that that is a coincidence in scripture, do
(23:33):
not fear, have faith, And it's easy to say. It
was never easy for me to do until I truly
met God. But fear is it's the opposite of faith.
And so show your faithfulness, yeah, you know, show your
faithfulness through laying down fear.
Speaker 1 (23:51):
For being just by being the example.
Speaker 4 (23:54):
Being the example that's right in your own marriage. And
then because I think that that's how we draw people in.
I want people on my platform to look at me
and not think, Okay, she doesn't practice what she preaches.
And I've had my moments, I've had my stumbles, but
I want them to look at me and go I
want that kind of faith because that's how I think
(24:15):
I might be a vessel of bringing people to Jesus
through trying.
Speaker 3 (24:19):
To live it. Does that mean I'm perfect?
Speaker 5 (24:21):
No?
Speaker 4 (24:22):
I say cuss words, you know, And I'm torn on that,
Like does God care about that?
Speaker 3 (24:26):
I don't even know.
Speaker 4 (24:28):
But in terms of the way that I treat people,
in terms of the way that I tried to handle
people's hearts.
Speaker 1 (24:35):
Right, yeah. And the credit that you give to your
very blessed life, Oh my.
Speaker 3 (24:39):
Gosh, it's all God.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
I mean there have been Listen, guys, y'all don't even
know the God moments that we've had since we've started
this adventure. Oh my god, there has been too many
to even name.
Speaker 4 (24:50):
So many that it cannot it cannot be a coincidence.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
And I feel like.
Speaker 2 (24:53):
The more glory that we give to Him, the more
blessed we become.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
One hundred percent, I had this really pivotal moment.
Speaker 4 (25:00):
It was one of the most intimate moments I have
had with God in my journey, and it hit me
like a freight train. My husband and I were watching TV.
It was his son needed something. He was Both of
our kids were getting ready for bed, so we were
trying to kind of catch a show during the thirty
minutes while they will they get ready for bed before
we have to do the whole bedtime tuck in and
(25:21):
I'll read stories and all that thing. And so his
son needed him first. My little girl's still in the shower,
so I of course, girl TikTok.
Speaker 3 (25:29):
Right.
Speaker 4 (25:29):
I'm sitting there and there's this Tim Tebow interview and
I just a huge Tim Tebow fan because he's so faithful.
And he was talking about, you know, the Florida Championship
game and the John three to sixteen thing where all
of the metrics lined out to be three sixteen and
like three hundred and sixteen million people googled John three
(25:51):
sixteen or like all of these crazy coincidences that would
be statistically absolutely impossible for it to be not a
God thing, right, And I just said this prayer and
I was like, God, I still don't know why You've
given me this platform why have you given me these
millions of people, Like I have over two million people
on social media, yeah that follow.
Speaker 3 (26:10):
Me, and to me, that is insane. It is it's insane.
Speaker 4 (26:13):
And over a quarter of million listeners right now on
this podcast that's just starting at second season, and so
that's a big voice. So i want to honor God
with that big voice. And I'm like, why did you
give me this platform? And he just spoke so clearly,
and he said, because you tell people about me. And
so when I get comments like you shouldn't talk about God,
(26:36):
I'm like, I'm here because of God, Yeah, exactly, And
I'm here because I keep speaking about God and it's
not even me, keeps blessing me. Like the months just
keep getting bigger, and the platforms keep getting bigger, and
the opportunities keep getting bigger.
Speaker 1 (26:54):
And you save more marriages. I mean, did you read
the comment last night on.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
The group your community group? I think you saw it
because you commented on it. Somebody just it was so beautiful,
and I like, it's comments like that.
Speaker 4 (27:06):
That really, I mean, obviously speak to us transformed in
my marriae.
Speaker 2 (27:11):
And then I was reading all the other comments and
I'm just like but I don't know if it's me,
it's like God working, it's God working.
Speaker 3 (27:18):
I don't even want to take the credit. I'm just
the vessel, right, I'm just a vessel.
Speaker 4 (27:23):
Yeah, you know, but I'm also human and prone to
sin and prone to mistakes. And I stumble I love
me a good Megan te song, which I've.
Speaker 3 (27:33):
Struggled with that too. I'm like, oh, that's my show.
That's the villain, that's the enemy. You know.
Speaker 2 (27:39):
I want to ask one more question, like what would
you say to someone who fears like vulnerability around spirituality,
maybe because they've had some trauma. Oh yeah, with like
you know, in the church or religion or you know,
there's so many circumstances say.
Speaker 3 (27:56):
That was not God.
Speaker 4 (27:58):
Those were flawed people aligning with the enemy, putting their
spin on God's word.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
That was not accurate. And if it harms you, it
is not from God.
Speaker 2 (28:07):
Yeah, And I know a lot of people struggle with that.
I know, you know, I mean I grew up in
the church. I you know, I was a preacher's daughter,
and but my experience was really beautiful, Like I don't
have anything. I mean, I was lucky because even though
my parents sheltered us a little bit.
Speaker 1 (28:24):
They were very spiritually open to.
Speaker 2 (28:28):
What we wanted to explore and what we wanted to learn,
and they always allowed us to have, you know, a
very intimate and personal relationship with Jesus Christ that allowed
you know, I've gone back and forth, I've swayed. I've
I've lived multiple you know seasons in my life where
you know, I've gone one direction and then I've come
(28:48):
back and you know, swayed and gone this direction. And
the beauty of I think having the parents that I
had is.
Speaker 1 (28:56):
That they always allowed it.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
They allowed myiritual journey to be what I needed it
to be in that moment. But I know, not everyone
has had that experience, and they've had a lot of
you know, maybe people being very rigid or even you know,
some really bad, bad, you know, experiences in the church
(29:19):
with like predatorial people.
Speaker 4 (29:22):
Absolutely, I have a lot of clients that have religious trauma,
and I just try to tell them those were people
and like Jesus had religious trauma too.
Speaker 3 (29:33):
They killed him. They killed him over it.
Speaker 4 (29:35):
Like Jesus had bad experiences with religion, religious people crucified him, right,
and so he knows what it's like to be hurt
by the quote church, they killed him. So if anybody
knows what that is, like, it is Jesus and he
wants to say, if someone has hurt you, that was
not me, that was not my father, that is the demonics,
(30:00):
beard of the enemy working through people, twisting and using
religion to harm.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
That's right. I'm sorry.
Speaker 4 (30:07):
And that doesn't mean that, you know, God doesn't have
standards for us. I think that he does, and I
think he has truth for us. And when I think
it's when we don't want to accept that truth because
maybe we don't make that mark, like we don't hit
the mark right because we're sinners. We want to reject
it as truth. We want to just kind of like
(30:28):
do it our way. And that's also not what God wants, right.
So I hope this isn't a mixed message.
Speaker 3 (30:36):
I don't.
Speaker 4 (30:36):
I'm not trying to send the message like do whatever
you want because Jesus forgives everything. I'm saying, get in
the word, find God's truth, and then try to live
it out as best as you can. And I am
not going to point to a specific sin or something.
Speaker 2 (30:53):
I'm just not and I think too, like I was
saying a little earlier, try to find God in the
every day, every day, right, because it's because some people
like the again, it's like church, like the big things
that that we feel like represent God, like the Church
and the Bible. It intimidates a lot of people, but
(31:14):
a lot of people specifically that do have some religious trauma.
So I just think that you have to look for
God in so many small everyday experiences. And you know,
we've talked about this maybe once or twice on a
few other episodes, but so we both share a spiritual
(31:37):
number and we have crazy for you know, I've experienced
this number obviously my whole life because I was born
on March twenty seventh, and so our spiritual number is
twenty seventh.
Speaker 3 (31:51):
Yes, and it's wild.
Speaker 4 (31:54):
The father of my kids who passed away, his birthday
was July twenty seventh, and twenty seven was his big
number he was And it's been about that.
Speaker 1 (32:01):
It's been a big number in my life. And like.
Speaker 2 (32:04):
We've often talked about it, and obviously it's our promo
code Love Doc twenty seven for twenty seven person off
and that was strategic, guys, It's not just some random
number that we chose, but it's crazy how.
Speaker 1 (32:17):
It has showed up in our life. And we've often.
Speaker 2 (32:20):
Said, like, it's our angel number, you know, and then
we've done some research around scripture and you know what
it means in scripture, and you've found some really you know,
fascinating and profound things around.
Speaker 3 (32:30):
It, twenty seven books and then testing me.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
Yeah, but it doesn't just show up like in time
or you know, it shows up in so many different ways,
like on our way here, like the road we travel
on the way here is Highway twenty seven. You know,
there's so many different things. But I had this really
epiphanal moment, probably I don't know, two weeks ago, and
I texted you and I was just like, this whole time,
(32:53):
I've been calling it, you know, our angel number. And
then again God spoke to me and said, no, it's
the Holy Spirit. Yeah, it's the Holy Spirit who's showing
up in these small ways to remind you to come
towards me, right, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
And the Holy Spirit shows up in so many ways
(33:15):
if you're just willing to look for it.
Speaker 3 (33:17):
Oh my goodness. Yes.
Speaker 4 (33:19):
And you know it's interesting because I think in our
relationships there are those small moments of love and connection,
and we need to make room for more of them.
And we need to lay down our pride, and we
need to lay down our stubbornness, and we need to
lay down our bitterness and resentment that we have. And
(33:43):
we have to be able to show up for our
partners in those very small ways and know that God
is there and present with us in those small moments,
like reach over and touch your partner right if you
guys are in a tiff, be the one to reach
over and touch your partner and make the first bid
(34:03):
for connections right right, or think about your partner ahead
of time, what would make them feel good or feel happy?
And how can I serve them today? Being servant hearted
towards your partner is so incredibly important and you can
only truly be intimately servant hearted if you pay attention
to them. You know, if you tune into them, God
(34:26):
tunes into us. He knows every hair on our head,
He made every feature by his design, and He wants
us to love our partners in those ways. So we
talk about attachment like the more avoidant folks who especially
the dismissive avoidant, you know, who really have the blinders
on and they're so self directed. And it's not necessarily
their fault that the enemy worked in those who helped
(34:49):
that develop, right, But we can choose to overcome it.
And when we align with what God wants for us
and his principles of love and you know, the fruit
of the spirit, we will start showing up for our
partner in those christ like ways in the little moments
of life. The life is made up of only little moments, right,
So that's all it's made up of. And so we
(35:11):
can't think about loving our partner in these grand ways
or these grand gestures like oh, well, I'm only going
to show up on Valentine's Day or right, or I'm
gonna get our a good Christmas present, right, you know. No,
it's the little ways every day that we show up
for our partner that add up. And it's the same
way God loves us. He shows up for us every
day in the little ways.
Speaker 2 (35:30):
It's really it's about laying down the sword, you know,
lay down the sword and become softer to things that
maybe you would have been harder to. And man, who
is this is big for me because I can get
really rigid and really hard on things that I'm kind
of got my heels dug into the dirt about and
(35:51):
I've had, you know, and I've experienced this in my
own marriage, and it's but I think that that's what
God intends marriage to be, this reflection and right of
how we can be more godlike.
Speaker 4 (36:03):
Yes, it's supposed to be a reflection of how Christ loves. Yes,
that's what they designed marriage to be. And so I
have some notes on my phone because I want to
specifically pull from scripture. And you know, I wish I
had all these memorized, you know, but I don't.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
You have a lot. I have a lot.
Speaker 2 (36:19):
I'm very impressed by your knowledge of the Bible. So
we'll give you credit. Okay, it's okay to use your phone, Teo.
Speaker 4 (36:25):
We have First Corinthians thirteen twelve. Now I know in
part then I shall know fully even as I am
fully known. So deep relationships reflect the divine design to
be fully known and still fully loved both by God
and one another. James five sixteen says, therefore, confess your
sins to each other and pray for each other so
that you may be healed.
Speaker 3 (36:46):
And this is a really.
Speaker 4 (36:47):
A reflection that you know, emotional vulnerability is not weakness,
it's not it's the path to healing, it's the path
to intimacy. It's the path to spiritual growth together in
your relationship.
Speaker 3 (36:59):
And it's beautiful when you can really.
Speaker 4 (37:03):
Be experience, like vulnerably deeply honest, you know. And my
husband and I have had numerous moments where we are
both in tears and we're both sharing something that we're
very ashamed of about ourselves, or that have humiliated us
in the past, or that have that still hurt us,
or things that we're deeply afraid of, you know. And
(37:26):
will you know, shed some tears together and that makes
me feel so close to him and so loved by
him to be accepted when revealing those things. Absolutely, And
so it's hard to tease a part emotional intimacy versus
spiritual intimacy. But all I can say is that here
from Scripture, it's, you know, emotional intimacy is the gateway
(37:49):
into being spiritually connected because the spirit is the deepest
part of ourselves.
Speaker 3 (37:53):
It's the true self, like.
Speaker 4 (37:54):
Our soul, from what I understand, And again, maybe I
don't think the scripture really delineates this clearly, but I've
come to my own understanding through my relationship with God,
that the soul is more of like our personality and
our preferences, and like our uniqueness, you know, as an individual,
where our spirit is the deepest part of our self
that's connected to God. Right, it's like the truest, most
(38:18):
divine part of ourself that the enemy wants to try
to influence and pull us away from.
Speaker 3 (38:22):
But when we're turned towards God, it is fully loving
the higher sel.
Speaker 4 (38:26):
It is the higher self that's connected to God. And
I want to share that with my husband.
Speaker 1 (38:32):
Absolutely.
Speaker 4 (38:33):
There's another one from Ephesians four. To be completely humble
and gentle, be patient bearing with one another in love
and true intimacy is built on gentleness, patience, and staying
emotionally present with one another.
Speaker 3 (38:49):
And then let's see Proverbs twenty five again.
Speaker 4 (38:52):
We can find so much in Proverbs about love. The
purposes of a person's heart are deep waters, but one
who as insight draws them out, showing that real love
listens deeply. Emotional intimacy happens when we patiently draw each
other out, just like God does with us.
Speaker 3 (39:09):
And I think that that is a good place to.
Speaker 2 (39:11):
Wrap up gosh Man reading reading from scripture is just
and again I believe it's the Holy Spirit, right Like
when I have absolutely when I have a body experience,
I feel like it's the Holy Spirit like coming into
my body, living in my heart.
Speaker 1 (39:27):
Right.
Speaker 2 (39:27):
So I just had one of those, and it's always
so profound because it's crazy.
Speaker 1 (39:32):
Like I get a little dizzy, yeah, and like I.
Speaker 4 (39:34):
Get chills, like I get like this asmr like tingle
up my spine.
Speaker 2 (39:38):
Yeah, my eyes start to water and this this always
happens to me when I when I'm in church too. Yeah,
I just cannot hold my emotions back. And it always
happens when people get baptized.
Speaker 3 (39:49):
Oh yeah, always, man.
Speaker 2 (39:51):
I just when when they're dipped into that water and
come you know, they come up clean.
Speaker 4 (39:56):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
I just it's just so beautiful. And so listen, guys,
if you're still here and you're still.
Speaker 3 (40:03):
Listening, we haven't lost. You haven't been like okay, and I.
Speaker 2 (40:06):
Know, you know some of the IF's this specific episode.
Some people will absolutely love it and some people turn
it off at the very beginning, which is totally fun.
Speaker 3 (40:14):
We still love you, we accept you, We do know.
Speaker 4 (40:17):
I mean, I'm not gonna stop talking about it. Here
and there. But we also have a lot of other,
you know, things to offer, a lot of psychology. We
have a lot of great guests that have expertise in
different areas that are going to be coming on. And
it's not just going to be all about God. But
I think God does play such a big role in
our lives that we can't not share it.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
That's right.
Speaker 3 (40:38):
He gave me this platform, he gave me this voice.
Speaker 4 (40:42):
Everything that has built this platform was built because God
saved me.
Speaker 1 (40:48):
God has turned every painful experience I've had in my
life into joy.
Speaker 4 (40:53):
And he promises to do that if you turn towards
Him and seek his character, because he doesn't just do
it for the random person that isn't seeking him, because
you can't hear him to go down the right road
to seek that redemption, you have to be able to
hear him and listen and allow him to guide you
(41:14):
to where the redemption lies. So you have to really
look at yourself and say, am I truly putting my
energy into seeking the character and nature of God? And
if the answer is no, then don't be surprised why
you don't experience redemption and blessings, because then you can't
hear his voice where he's saying, turn right, not left right,
because the redemption's over here on the right side.
Speaker 3 (41:36):
But you're over here on the left side, here.
Speaker 4 (41:37):
In the enemy's bitterness and accusation and rejection and jealousy
and all of the things over there.
Speaker 1 (41:44):
God lives within you.
Speaker 2 (41:45):
And if you are seeking more spiritual you know, just depth.
I think that doctor Hensley has wonderful services that can
help you. But again we want to emphasiz that she
has a completely secular way of doing things as well,
that you know, it's based strictly off the psychology, and.
Speaker 4 (42:07):
I let clients choose you want the psychology or you
want the spiritual version.
Speaker 1 (42:10):
I mean question on anybody.
Speaker 2 (42:11):
No, absolutely not well, I loved this episode too. I
feel really warm and fuzzy right now. So we hope
that you do too, and please you know, obviously you
can go you know the story now behind to love
DOOC twenty seven it's our holy spirit number.
Speaker 4 (42:29):
I see it every single time I look at the clock.
It's something twenty seven.
Speaker 1 (42:32):
Everywhere.
Speaker 4 (42:33):
If I look at the clock ten times a day,
seven out of ten it is a minute mark or
twenty seven. And I'm sorry but like that's statistically insane.
It means I agree, and it's it's just everywhere everywhere.
We see it everywhere, and you know, maybe there's a
little bit of a bias that you know, Okay, now
that we're kind of looking for it, we see it everywhere,
but it can't explain.
Speaker 1 (42:51):
It all now, absolutely not.
Speaker 4 (42:53):
So I don't know exactly what it all means. Maybe
we will know someday, maybe why that it's both shoved
in our faces like all the time and we're just
like twenty seven seven.
Speaker 1 (43:05):
I don't know that's an evolution, So we shall see.
Speaker 2 (43:08):
But please go use that code Love Doc twenty seven
and check out to check out doctor Hensley's services. And
please guys, continue to tune in. We have you know,
more series that we're gonna do. We don't know if
we're really gonna wrap this series up yet. We are
still waiting on some guests, so we shall see, but
stay tuned. Please go like check out our patreons account
(43:30):
at patreons dot com Slash the Love Dog Podcast. You
can sign up to be a free member or a
paid member. We would love your support, of course, and
then continue to just listen, like subscribe, leave us a comment.
Speaker 1 (43:42):
We have merch, Yes, we have merch.
Speaker 3 (43:44):
We have some really cute ones.
Speaker 2 (43:45):
Let's go check out our merch, and that's always evolving.
Our merch is always evolving. So I ordered us some stuff.
So I ordered us some hats, and we're gonna kind
of display some of it on the set. So please
go check all that out. And until next time, peace, love,
and perspective.
Welcome to the Love Dog Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
I'm your co host Rena Butcher here with our host,
doctor Sarah Hensley, the owner, founder and CEO of the
Love Dog Relationship Coaching Services.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Hey, hey, it's Capital Friday.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
It is. It's feel good Friday.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
It's your favorite. You're always like feel good fright, Friya
is that what you say?
Speaker 3 (00:30):
Yeah, Frye.
Speaker 4 (00:31):
That's why I got my I need a Diet Coke
shirt on, and I brought a diet coke with me
because even though it's terrible for you, it's so good.
Speaker 3 (00:38):
I'm gonna drink it. It is so good.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
That's all I wanted yesterday.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
It was a fountain diet coke, but specifically from McDonald's.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
They have the best.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
We don't endorse McDonald's, but you're free endorsement.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
For diet coke is the bomb.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
What what makes it?
Speaker 3 (00:53):
I don't know. All their fountain drinks are so good.
Speaker 1 (00:56):
I'm like it should be illegal, Like it's like crack.
I mean that stuff is.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
I'm addicted to diet coke.
Speaker 4 (01:02):
It's bad, and you know, I'm trying so hard, just
like one a day, and then I'm trying to replace
it with other stuff too, and for a long time
I was off of it, but we all like years
I was off of it. Yeah, then I married. My husband.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
Does he love dick?
Speaker 3 (01:16):
He loves die coke too.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
There's something about the burn I know that goes down.
Speaker 4 (01:21):
Your throat because I was addicted to it in college
and graduate school, like saying it, studying, I would drink
like a case.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
I had a roommate that was addicted to diet coke too,
and so I am. In college, I was definitely.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
Addicted to diet coke.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
But every once in a while, I don't know, it's
just like this comfort thing I just want, specifically a
fountain like the can doesn't do it for me.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
You see, I'm a can. I'm a cold can girly.
I don't really like ice as much. I mean, I
will do a fountain. My husband loves fountain drinks, but
I will prefer the can.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Yeah, well instead of diet coke. What you really should
be drinking is armor. And if yes, you should and
if you want to try armor, we are big, big
advocates for art.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Yes, it's changed our gut health.
Speaker 4 (02:05):
For sure, specifically because I read some research that diet
coke kills the gut bacteria.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Oh, I believe it.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
It like kills all the good gut bacteria.
Speaker 4 (02:14):
And I'm like, okay, well I'm drinking my armor. Yeah right,
hopefully help my gut.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
Yeah, And it definitely helps with I think drinking your
water if you're someone who has difficulty getting your.
Speaker 4 (02:25):
Water, because I like flavor, so I want a little
flavor in my water.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
So the armor is just the perfect amount of flavor.
Speaker 4 (02:31):
It tastes delicious and it absolutely has helped my gut
and I think just my overall energy levels as well.
In one supplement design to help with your gut, your skin,
your hair, immunity, everything. So please visit Armora dot com
and use code love doc and for fifteen percent off
(02:52):
if you are a first time purchaser.
Speaker 3 (02:54):
Yes, thank you all.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
Only for first time purchasers.
Speaker 2 (02:57):
But anyway, so we love arm Room, We love Die Cocon.
That's not what this episode is about. This episode we
are still in our a sexit intimacy series. This is
episode three of season two, which is spiritual intimacy, the
missing link in modern romance.
Speaker 4 (03:17):
A lot of people say, don't talk about God on
your podcast. We don't want to hear about God. Well,
then guess what this podcast is not for you because
sometimes we are going to talk about God because God
changed my life. It's my dang platform, and I'm going
to talk about God when I want to talk about God,
because I will never deny my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, never.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
And so maybe this is an episode that if that's
not for you, you can just skip it.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
Just skip it, no harm, no foul.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
Or maybe if you feel uncomfortable at the thought of
this episode, maybe that's even more reason.
Speaker 4 (03:47):
Yeah, maybe God's like going, Hey, maybe you think things
about me that are not true. Maybe your view of
me and my character are not true because flawed humans
who are influenced by the enemy have in some way,
shape or form or made you feel uncomfortable.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
That is not God.
Speaker 4 (04:03):
God is love, only love, all love, all the time.
There's nothing else that is made up of God.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
Like God is love and he'll change.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Like I get goosebumps when I think about it and
talk about it because.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
The profound ways that he can change your life.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
Yeah, like you just if you.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
Just give him, if you just let him in.
Speaker 4 (04:25):
Yeah, because I don't like religion. I am not religious
at all. I am a follower of Christ and Christ
set three rules, Love God, love your neighbor as yourself,
which yes, implies you need to love yourself.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
So how is that bad?
Speaker 4 (04:44):
Right?
Speaker 3 (04:45):
Right?
Speaker 2 (04:46):
I don't know, right, And I mean, speaking specifically on
this episode, I really.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Do think that. And I don't have a ton of
experience on.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
This because obviously you know, Josh and I have been
together on five years now, But the dating scene, specifically
when you're trying to look for a partner, I think
that there's a big missing link. Let's not again taking
religion out of it, but like with just like the
spiritual warfare that people are in and trying to navigate
(05:18):
the dating world, Like it just has to be so
difficult to be someone who maybe is in the dating
scene and is a follower of Christ and like trying
to navigate that. I just I don't envy anyone, right situation.
Speaker 4 (05:36):
Yeah, I mean, Donald and I started dating about four
years ago, and it was such a match because we
were so equally yoked spiritually, because we both kind of
came from that deliverance place of like, okay, we take
Ephesian six twelve seriously, like this is not a battle
(05:57):
in this life against flesh and blood. It is a
against good and evil, right, and that we want to
be on the side of good and evil looks like
a lot of things that people deal with every single
day that they don't even realize is demonic and it
is coming from the enemy. And it is the wish
and will of the enemy to put those thoughts in
(06:17):
your head and to carry out his evil wishes like bitterness,
like rejection. I mean, rejection is idolatry. It's the severing
of the first commandment. It's putting someone else on a
pedestal above God, right, because God never rejects us, and
so it is not loving to God to participate in rejection.
(06:38):
You know, jealousy, envy, accusation against others. There are so
many ways in which we can fall victim to the
enemy's desires for us to carry out all of the
bad in the world. And you know, God is the
fruit of the spirit love, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness,
(06:59):
self control.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
Yeah, and when you have those things inside your your
romantic relationship or any relationship really, I mean, it just
kind of catapults you to this place of higher success.
And you know, I think putting God first in your
relationship is really the ultimate way to have a lifelong,
loving marriage and relationship.
Speaker 4 (07:21):
Absolutely in my opinion, right in my opinion, because love
conquers all things. That's biblical. True love casts out fear.
That's biblical. And I think so much of what I
see in my practice in terms of relational trauma, relational struggles,
the root is spiritual.
Speaker 3 (07:41):
Do I have you know?
Speaker 4 (07:42):
And what's interesting is that psychology and Christianity almost completely align.
Like whatever psychologists claim that they said. First, I actually
kind of in the Bible most of it right, in
terms of stabilization of our mental health and our well
being spiritually, all of that can be found in pretty
(08:03):
much Proverbs, right, It can all be found there.
Speaker 3 (08:08):
And when we.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
Live our life according to the fruit of the spirit
and what God sees love, as we experience the full
extent of love, we really do. And so many clients
in my practice are struggling with that peace, And of
course I don't bring it to them.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
If they don't want it.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
We can stick with the psychology if that's what they're
comfortable with. But if they were able to put God first,
and not only in their own relationship with the Lord,
but the marriage relationship and placing that in God's hands
and placing God at the center of that. There's actually
a study that shows that the divorce rate of couples
(08:51):
that pray together every day is less than seven percent,
when we have a national divorce rate that is approaching sixty.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
So think about that. Can't be a coincidence.
Speaker 4 (09:05):
And I don't think it comes from people thinking, well,
once I'm married, like you know, God says I can't
get divorced.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
I don't think it's that.
Speaker 4 (09:13):
Yeah, I think that when you're praying with each other
and you're praying for each other, God hears that and
he blesses that, and he provides that protection and that
covering over your marriage because you're asking him to. We
have to remember that we have free will, and we
can ask God for things, very specific, very specific things,
(09:36):
and you know, it might not always look like we
think it should look, but God does answer prayers and
he does provide protection. He can't protect us from our
own free will and the free will of other people
because He granted that to us without limitation. And sometimes
we'll engage in our own free will to align with
the enemy, and a lot of people do this in
(09:57):
their marriage.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
Yeah, And I want to be clear for our listeners,
Like there's a difference, right, there's a difference between emotional
intimacy and spiritual intimacy. And so I think like for
our listeners, just to line it out and make it
really clear, Like again, in your opinion, what does spiritual
intimacy look like?
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Yeah, I mean you.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Said a little bit about it, right, It's couples that
pray together day, It's couples that you know, like, this
isn't about sex per se, this is the same. Yeah,
this is about connecting spiritually and allowing God to be
the force in your relationship.
Speaker 5 (10:33):
Right.
Speaker 4 (10:33):
Well, I think that you know, emotional intimacy is definitely
a gateway for spiritual intimacy because you can't be spiritually
connected without being emotionally connected. And I think it's emotional
connection through things like patience and humility and you know,
(10:55):
repentance towards each other, right, which is what we talk
about in terms of repair in our relationships.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
We have to have accountability.
Speaker 4 (11:04):
You can't really be accountable if you're not humble enough
to admit that you've done something wrong or that you've
hurt your partner in a way. Even that you might
not understand, right. And God is pushing us to have
forgiveness instead of resentment. He's pushing us towards being humble
and having humility. He's pushing us towards being patient, He's
pushing us towards being honest with one another. In honesty
(11:29):
really comes through true, deep vulnerability, and so emotional intimacy
kind of bridges the gap and is the gateway towards
spiritual intimacy, which, in my opinion, spiritual intimacy is when
two spirits really align in love, with God at the
center of that, with faith in Christ, in my opinion,
(11:50):
at the center of that. And so it's trying your
best to love in a christ like way, in the
way that Christ loved us.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
And why do you think it's missing so much in
modern romance specifically like in today's world. I mean, there's
a plethora of.
Speaker 4 (12:05):
Things, oh gosh, so many things. First and foremost culture,
and what is so hard and what so many of us,
even myself having the platform that I do struggle with,
is that what is supposed to be loving and socially
acceptable in the world is not actually aligned with what
God says is loving.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
Can you give an example.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Oh gosh, okay, how do I do this without getting canceled?
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Okay, don't worry about I know we have to worry
about and can get canceled.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
We don't want to get canceled, but I don't want
to deny God either. Right.
Speaker 4 (12:43):
So accepting everything isn't necessarily loving.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
Right.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
So there are things within people's lifestyles or choices that
I don't think we have to accept tolerate. Yes, I
do not believe in hatred of in any way, shape
or form, and I do believe that part of love
(13:13):
is willing to have tolerance and acceptance of everyone. But
we don't have to have acceptance of that behavior in
our own life, nor do we have to step up
and like protest for it or say you know, no,
everybody should be allowed to do whatever they want. I mean,
(13:35):
I guess there anybody's allowed to do whatever they want.
But does God see that as good? No? So there
are things that I think are influencing our ability to
have spiritual intimacy based upon what's happening in our culture.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
Right.
Speaker 5 (13:53):
So you did a great job there, okay with specific
And I also believe you know, a sin is a
sin is a sin as a sin is a sin,
and people are wrong for pointing out specific people with
specific behaviors and being like, nope, you're wrong, right, right, No,
this is about in all totality.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
We're all sinners here, Oh my gosh.
Speaker 4 (14:14):
Yes, So someone over here that's in bitterness is just is,
you know, is sinning and we're not necessarily picking on them.
And I think that that's where religiosity comes in when
we have like quote rules, right.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
I think God's standards.
Speaker 4 (14:28):
Are love God, love your neighbor as yourself, but that
does not mean that we have to stand up and
accept or.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
I don't know what the right word is I'm looking
for here. I guess promote is the word.
Speaker 4 (14:43):
I'm looking for every lifestyle under the sun, right, But
also take the log out of your own eye. That's
really important. I don't think God likes hypocrites, and I
don't want to be one. So my place is not
to judge someone's lifestyle. It's not to call someone out
for their lifestyle, but it is to say, is your
(15:03):
lifestyle honoring God? Nobody does completely unless you were Jesus Christ.
But I think the point of it is to try
to make your life as representative of what God sees
as good as possible, and I have faltered and I
still struggle.
Speaker 1 (15:21):
Absolutely.
Speaker 4 (15:22):
Psychologists call it your shadow traits, right, and I have
some shadow traits. My shadow trait is the villain. I've
talked about this, right, We've talked about this before. It's
like the bitterness for people that have hurt me and
wanting to seek revenge or wanting to one up. I
(15:42):
think there's my shadow trait is pride, you know, like
wanting to be like, no, you know, look how hard
I've worked and I built myself up from nothing and
I have this huge platform, and like if your life sucks,
well you didn't.
Speaker 3 (15:54):
Work hard enough for you.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
You know.
Speaker 4 (15:55):
That's my shadow side. But that's from the enemy, you know.
Speaker 3 (15:59):
And that's where.
Speaker 4 (16:01):
I don't want to necessarily accept those things about myself.
I need to recognize them and that they're there. And
I'm not going to apply shame to it, because Christ
died to rid us of shame.
Speaker 3 (16:15):
But what I am going to do is I'm going
to pray really hard about that.
Speaker 4 (16:17):
I'm going to see the enemies work in that and
do everything I can to take spiritual authority over it
and reject it when I catch it.
Speaker 3 (16:25):
Yeah, do I get stuck in it sometimes and in
progress so hard.
Speaker 4 (16:31):
But in terms of our relationship in our marriage, we
can get stuck in those things in our marriage, like
being stubborn, being prideful, rejecting humility, rejecting intimacy, you know,
through avoidance or disengagement, when that's not how God loves us.
He never rejects us, He never leaves nor forsakes us.
(16:54):
Now that's not to say that God and Jesus actually
had some good boundaries. Boundaries can be loving by not
enabling people to hurt you in evil ways.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
Well, I mean God has boundaries, right, because he gives
us free will. He definitely free will is a boundary.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
It is.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
It is.
Speaker 4 (17:11):
He's saying, I'm not going to make you a robot
that just loves me because I'm some narcissistic being that
has to be loved. He's saying, I want you to
choose to love me, And so he's saying that also,
I want you to choose to love your spouse.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
Yeah, so what would you say, you know, for maybe
a couple who's craving more spiritual intimacy, like where's a
good place to start, you know, because I know a
lot of people like the church, for example, cure, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (17:37):
The scripture, reading God's word. You can't know God if
you don't read his word. And I'm faltering on that too.
And it's like again, I go through phases where I'm
on it and I'm deep in the word and I'm like,
you know what, yes, I am living this every day, right,
And then there are times where life gets so busy and.
Speaker 3 (17:57):
I'm like, I haven't been in the word.
Speaker 4 (17:58):
Yeah, But then I noticed this real direct correlation between
that and my level of happiness, my experience of joy,
how patient I am with my children and my spouse,
and my ability to live the fruit of the spirit. Yeah,
it's it's true.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
It's very true.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
I notice it in my own life too, like when
I'm really committed to, you know, my Sunday Bible study
or really just being in church. And I know, like
church can be somewhat intimidating for some people, but for
me personally, I think, you know, the times that Josh
and I have gone together, it's been this really connected space.
(18:37):
And you know, I also think that you know, your
church can really be wherever you choose it to be
you know, it can be.
Speaker 4 (18:44):
We are the church, right, right, the body of believers
is the church. You don't necessarily need a building for that.
You just need people gathering together, supporting one another for
God's mission.
Speaker 2 (18:58):
And you can feel close to God. And many places
I feel closest to God, you know, like when I'm
in nature, and when Josh and I are in nature together,
it's a very spiritual experience for us. And so that's
always been something we've really connected on. And that's what
I think is important for our listeners to know, is like,
spiritual intimacy doesn't have to be what religion lines it
(19:19):
out to look like, right. It can look like a
lot of different things, And it can look like you know,
you and your partner, you know, taking a trip together
and you know, detoxing from your phones. Right Like, these
are ways that you can spiritually connect with each other. Yes,
And and you know, obviously for us specifically God.
Speaker 1 (19:42):
And you know Jesus is a part of that.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
But everything is welcome here, you know, we welcome that,
and so we just you know, we want everyone to
know that, even if you've already turned us off because
you don't want to hear.
Speaker 4 (19:55):
Right, right, And like I said, I want to be
really clear, I am not naming specific sins, pointing out
specific sins because I think that is so harmful. It
is so harmful it pushes people away from God. If
you believe that God has this finite set of rules,
(20:17):
right and you, you will never meet the metric because
how much how granular can you go in those rules?
Speaker 3 (20:25):
Like where's the where's the line? Right?
Speaker 4 (20:27):
So if you think, like, for example, drinking alcohol is okay, well,
then where's the line between when it's drunkenness and it
becomes sinful?
Speaker 2 (20:35):
Right?
Speaker 3 (20:35):
Is it when you get a tiny bit of a buzz?
Is it? You know? True? Like fallen down drunk? Like,
where's the line? Right?
Speaker 4 (20:40):
That's why we can't point at somebody and be like
your your lifestyle is is sinful? No, the way to
go about it is to say, look.
Speaker 3 (20:52):
Here's what love is.
Speaker 4 (20:53):
Here's what God says are the paths to less suffering
in this life. And if you give your life over
to him and you allow him to guide you in
that way, he will guide you in the way that
He wants to specifically shape you and mold you to
carry out your mission here on this earth. So I
(21:15):
don't want anybody to feel judged or think that I'm
pointing at them and saying this is unacceptable or not unacceptable.
We all do things that are unacceptable in God's eyes,
which is why we have Jesus Christ, because none of
us will ever meet the mark. God's standard is perfection.
None of us will meet it, which is why Jesus
came and died for us. Because if you start pointing
(21:37):
fingers that, well, you do this, or you do that,
or you do this and you do that, we get
in big trouble and we lose the message and then
God can't work right. But I do think culture promotes
a lot of demonic and a lot of evil and
a lot of you know, and a lot of people
think I'm talking about sexuality or something like that. I'm not.
(22:00):
I'm talking about like demonic representations of like you know,
with violence and bigotry and all of those things.
Speaker 3 (22:13):
Those are evil things.
Speaker 1 (22:15):
Yeah. Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (22:16):
I want to for the couple specifically where one partner
is maybe more spiritually further along than the other and.
Speaker 3 (22:27):
They want us all the time in life practice, they
want to.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
Pull the other partner into a more spiritual experience.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
What's advice you would give to that couple.
Speaker 4 (22:37):
Live and love in the most christ Like way possible
and demonstrate to your partner what Christ's love really looks
like in action.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
Yeah, because.
Speaker 4 (22:50):
You can tell them about it, you can bring him
to church. But we learn through experience and we relate
to each other through experiences, and so they need to
experience your christ like love, right, So be humble, be kind,
be patient, listen, take accountability, show them your faithfulness and
(23:13):
your trust in God. Like talking about specific sins, fear
is one of the in my opinion, one of the
worst sins out there. And I struggle, I still struggle
with it because fear is the opposite of faith. And
God said three hundred and sixty five times, and I
don't think that that is a coincidence in scripture, do
(23:33):
not fear, have faith, And it's easy to say. It
was never easy for me to do until I truly
met God. But fear is it's the opposite of faith.
And so show your faithfulness, yeah, you know, show your
faithfulness through laying down fear.
Speaker 1 (23:51):
For being just by being the example.
Speaker 4 (23:54):
Being the example that's right in your own marriage. And
then because I think that that's how we draw people in.
I want people on my platform to look at me
and not think, Okay, she doesn't practice what she preaches.
And I've had my moments, I've had my stumbles, but
I want them to look at me and go I
want that kind of faith because that's how I think
(24:15):
I might be a vessel of bringing people to Jesus
through trying.
Speaker 3 (24:19):
To live it. Does that mean I'm perfect?
Speaker 5 (24:21):
No?
Speaker 4 (24:22):
I say cuss words, you know, And I'm torn on that,
Like does God care about that?
Speaker 3 (24:26):
I don't even know.
Speaker 4 (24:28):
But in terms of the way that I treat people,
in terms of the way that I tried to handle
people's hearts.
Speaker 1 (24:35):
Right, yeah. And the credit that you give to your
very blessed life, Oh my.
Speaker 3 (24:39):
Gosh, it's all God.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
I mean there have been Listen, guys, y'all don't even
know the God moments that we've had since we've started
this adventure. Oh my god, there has been too many
to even name.
Speaker 4 (24:50):
So many that it cannot it cannot be a coincidence.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
And I feel like.
Speaker 2 (24:53):
The more glory that we give to Him, the more
blessed we become.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
One hundred percent, I had this really pivotal moment.
Speaker 4 (25:00):
It was one of the most intimate moments I have
had with God in my journey, and it hit me
like a freight train. My husband and I were watching TV.
It was his son needed something. He was Both of
our kids were getting ready for bed, so we were
trying to kind of catch a show during the thirty
minutes while they will they get ready for bed before
we have to do the whole bedtime tuck in and
(25:21):
I'll read stories and all that thing. And so his
son needed him first. My little girl's still in the shower,
so I of course, girl TikTok.
Speaker 3 (25:29):
Right.
Speaker 4 (25:29):
I'm sitting there and there's this Tim Tebow interview and
I just a huge Tim Tebow fan because he's so faithful.
And he was talking about, you know, the Florida Championship
game and the John three to sixteen thing where all
of the metrics lined out to be three sixteen and
like three hundred and sixteen million people googled John three
(25:51):
sixteen or like all of these crazy coincidences that would
be statistically absolutely impossible for it to be not a
God thing, right, And I just said this prayer and
I was like, God, I still don't know why You've
given me this platform why have you given me these
millions of people, Like I have over two million people
on social media, yeah that follow.
Speaker 3 (26:10):
Me, and to me, that is insane. It is it's insane.
Speaker 4 (26:13):
And over a quarter of million listeners right now on
this podcast that's just starting at second season, and so
that's a big voice. So i want to honor God
with that big voice. And I'm like, why did you
give me this platform? And he just spoke so clearly,
and he said, because you tell people about me. And
so when I get comments like you shouldn't talk about God,
(26:36):
I'm like, I'm here because of God, Yeah, exactly, And
I'm here because I keep speaking about God and it's
not even me, keeps blessing me. Like the months just
keep getting bigger, and the platforms keep getting bigger, and
the opportunities keep getting bigger.
Speaker 1 (26:54):
And you save more marriages. I mean, did you read
the comment last night on.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
The group your community group? I think you saw it
because you commented on it. Somebody just it was so beautiful,
and I like, it's comments like that.
Speaker 4 (27:06):
That really, I mean, obviously speak to us transformed in
my marriae.
Speaker 2 (27:11):
And then I was reading all the other comments and
I'm just like but I don't know if it's me,
it's like God working, it's God working.
Speaker 3 (27:18):
I don't even want to take the credit. I'm just
the vessel, right, I'm just a vessel.
Speaker 4 (27:23):
Yeah, you know, but I'm also human and prone to
sin and prone to mistakes. And I stumble I love
me a good Megan te song, which I've.
Speaker 3 (27:33):
Struggled with that too. I'm like, oh, that's my show.
That's the villain, that's the enemy. You know.
Speaker 2 (27:39):
I want to ask one more question, like what would
you say to someone who fears like vulnerability around spirituality,
maybe because they've had some trauma. Oh yeah, with like
you know, in the church or religion or you know,
there's so many circumstances say.
Speaker 3 (27:56):
That was not God.
Speaker 4 (27:58):
Those were flawed people aligning with the enemy, putting their
spin on God's word.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
That was not accurate. And if it harms you, it
is not from God.
Speaker 2 (28:07):
Yeah, And I know a lot of people struggle with that.
I know, you know, I mean I grew up in
the church. I you know, I was a preacher's daughter,
and but my experience was really beautiful, Like I don't
have anything. I mean, I was lucky because even though
my parents sheltered us a little bit.
Speaker 1 (28:24):
They were very spiritually open to.
Speaker 2 (28:28):
What we wanted to explore and what we wanted to learn,
and they always allowed us to have, you know, a
very intimate and personal relationship with Jesus Christ that allowed
you know, I've gone back and forth, I've swayed. I've
I've lived multiple you know seasons in my life where
you know, I've gone one direction and then I've come
(28:48):
back and you know, swayed and gone this direction. And
the beauty of I think having the parents that I
had is.
Speaker 1 (28:56):
That they always allowed it.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
They allowed myiritual journey to be what I needed it
to be in that moment. But I know, not everyone
has had that experience, and they've had a lot of
you know, maybe people being very rigid or even you know,
some really bad, bad, you know, experiences in the church
(29:19):
with like predatorial people.
Speaker 4 (29:22):
Absolutely, I have a lot of clients that have religious trauma,
and I just try to tell them those were people
and like Jesus had religious trauma too.
Speaker 3 (29:33):
They killed him. They killed him over it.
Speaker 4 (29:35):
Like Jesus had bad experiences with religion, religious people crucified him, right,
and so he knows what it's like to be hurt
by the quote church, they killed him. So if anybody
knows what that is, like, it is Jesus and he
wants to say, if someone has hurt you, that was
not me, that was not my father, that is the demonics,
(30:00):
beard of the enemy working through people, twisting and using
religion to harm.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
That's right. I'm sorry.
Speaker 4 (30:07):
And that doesn't mean that, you know, God doesn't have
standards for us. I think that he does, and I
think he has truth for us. And when I think
it's when we don't want to accept that truth because
maybe we don't make that mark, like we don't hit
the mark right because we're sinners. We want to reject
it as truth. We want to just kind of like
(30:28):
do it our way. And that's also not what God wants, right.
So I hope this isn't a mixed message.
Speaker 3 (30:36):
I don't.
Speaker 4 (30:36):
I'm not trying to send the message like do whatever
you want because Jesus forgives everything. I'm saying, get in
the word, find God's truth, and then try to live
it out as best as you can. And I am
not going to point to a specific sin or something.
Speaker 2 (30:53):
I'm just not and I think too, like I was
saying a little earlier, try to find God in the
every day, every day, right, because it's because some people
like the again, it's like church, like the big things
that that we feel like represent God, like the Church
and the Bible. It intimidates a lot of people, but
(31:14):
a lot of people specifically that do have some religious trauma.
So I just think that you have to look for
God in so many small everyday experiences. And you know,
we've talked about this maybe once or twice on a
few other episodes, but so we both share a spiritual
(31:37):
number and we have crazy for you know, I've experienced
this number obviously my whole life because I was born
on March twenty seventh, and so our spiritual number is
twenty seventh.
Speaker 3 (31:51):
Yes, and it's wild.
Speaker 4 (31:54):
The father of my kids who passed away, his birthday
was July twenty seventh, and twenty seven was his big
number he was And it's been about that.
Speaker 1 (32:01):
It's been a big number in my life. And like.
Speaker 2 (32:04):
We've often talked about it, and obviously it's our promo
code Love Doc twenty seven for twenty seven person off
and that was strategic, guys, It's not just some random
number that we chose, but it's crazy how.
Speaker 1 (32:17):
It has showed up in our life. And we've often.
Speaker 2 (32:20):
Said, like, it's our angel number, you know, and then
we've done some research around scripture and you know what
it means in scripture, and you've found some really you know,
fascinating and profound things around.
Speaker 3 (32:30):
It, twenty seven books and then testing me.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
Yeah, but it doesn't just show up like in time
or you know, it shows up in so many different ways,
like on our way here, like the road we travel
on the way here is Highway twenty seven. You know,
there's so many different things. But I had this really
epiphanal moment, probably I don't know, two weeks ago, and
I texted you and I was just like, this whole time,
(32:53):
I've been calling it, you know, our angel number. And
then again God spoke to me and said, no, it's
the Holy Spirit. Yeah, it's the Holy Spirit who's showing
up in these small ways to remind you to come
towards me, right, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
And the Holy Spirit shows up in so many ways
(33:15):
if you're just willing to look for it.
Speaker 3 (33:17):
Oh my goodness. Yes.
Speaker 4 (33:19):
And you know it's interesting because I think in our
relationships there are those small moments of love and connection,
and we need to make room for more of them.
And we need to lay down our pride, and we
need to lay down our stubbornness, and we need to
lay down our bitterness and resentment that we have. And
(33:43):
we have to be able to show up for our
partners in those very small ways and know that God
is there and present with us in those small moments,
like reach over and touch your partner right if you
guys are in a tiff, be the one to reach
over and touch your partner and make the first bid
(34:03):
for connections right right, or think about your partner ahead
of time, what would make them feel good or feel happy?
And how can I serve them today? Being servant hearted
towards your partner is so incredibly important and you can
only truly be intimately servant hearted if you pay attention
to them. You know, if you tune into them, God
(34:26):
tunes into us. He knows every hair on our head,
He made every feature by his design, and He wants
us to love our partners in those ways. So we
talk about attachment like the more avoidant folks who especially
the dismissive avoidant, you know, who really have the blinders
on and they're so self directed. And it's not necessarily
their fault that the enemy worked in those who helped
(34:49):
that develop, right, But we can choose to overcome it.
And when we align with what God wants for us
and his principles of love and you know, the fruit
of the spirit, we will start showing up for our
partner in those christ like ways in the little moments
of life. The life is made up of only little moments, right,
So that's all it's made up of. And so we
(35:11):
can't think about loving our partner in these grand ways
or these grand gestures like oh, well, I'm only going
to show up on Valentine's Day or right, or I'm
gonna get our a good Christmas present, right, you know. No,
it's the little ways every day that we show up
for our partner that add up. And it's the same
way God loves us. He shows up for us every
day in the little ways.
Speaker 2 (35:30):
It's really it's about laying down the sword, you know,
lay down the sword and become softer to things that
maybe you would have been harder to. And man, who
is this is big for me because I can get
really rigid and really hard on things that I'm kind
of got my heels dug into the dirt about and
(35:51):
I've had, you know, and I've experienced this in my
own marriage, and it's but I think that that's what
God intends marriage to be, this reflection and right of
how we can be more godlike.
Speaker 4 (36:03):
Yes, it's supposed to be a reflection of how Christ loves. Yes,
that's what they designed marriage to be. And so I
have some notes on my phone because I want to
specifically pull from scripture. And you know, I wish I
had all these memorized, you know, but I don't.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
You have a lot. I have a lot.
Speaker 2 (36:19):
I'm very impressed by your knowledge of the Bible. So
we'll give you credit. Okay, it's okay to use your phone, Teo.
Speaker 4 (36:25):
We have First Corinthians thirteen twelve. Now I know in
part then I shall know fully even as I am
fully known. So deep relationships reflect the divine design to
be fully known and still fully loved both by God
and one another. James five sixteen says, therefore, confess your
sins to each other and pray for each other so
that you may be healed.
Speaker 3 (36:46):
And this is a really.
Speaker 4 (36:47):
A reflection that you know, emotional vulnerability is not weakness,
it's not it's the path to healing, it's the path
to intimacy. It's the path to spiritual growth together in
your relationship.
Speaker 3 (36:59):
And it's beautiful when you can really.
Speaker 4 (37:03):
Be experience, like vulnerably deeply honest, you know. And my
husband and I have had numerous moments where we are
both in tears and we're both sharing something that we're
very ashamed of about ourselves, or that have humiliated us
in the past, or that have that still hurt us,
or things that we're deeply afraid of, you know. And
(37:26):
will you know, shed some tears together and that makes
me feel so close to him and so loved by
him to be accepted when revealing those things. Absolutely, And
so it's hard to tease a part emotional intimacy versus
spiritual intimacy. But all I can say is that here
from Scripture, it's, you know, emotional intimacy is the gateway
(37:49):
into being spiritually connected because the spirit is the deepest
part of ourselves.
Speaker 3 (37:53):
It's the true self, like.
Speaker 4 (37:54):
Our soul, from what I understand, And again, maybe I
don't think the scripture really delineates this clearly, but I've
come to my own understanding through my relationship with God,
that the soul is more of like our personality and
our preferences, and like our uniqueness, you know, as an individual,
where our spirit is the deepest part of our self
that's connected to God. Right, it's like the truest, most
(38:18):
divine part of ourself that the enemy wants to try
to influence and pull us away from.
Speaker 3 (38:22):
But when we're turned towards God, it is fully loving
the higher sel.
Speaker 4 (38:26):
It is the higher self that's connected to God. And
I want to share that with my husband.
Speaker 1 (38:32):
Absolutely.
Speaker 4 (38:33):
There's another one from Ephesians four. To be completely humble
and gentle, be patient bearing with one another in love
and true intimacy is built on gentleness, patience, and staying
emotionally present with one another.
Speaker 3 (38:49):
And then let's see Proverbs twenty five again.
Speaker 4 (38:52):
We can find so much in Proverbs about love. The
purposes of a person's heart are deep waters, but one
who as insight draws them out, showing that real love
listens deeply. Emotional intimacy happens when we patiently draw each
other out, just like God does with us.
Speaker 3 (39:09):
And I think that that is a good place to.
Speaker 2 (39:11):
Wrap up gosh Man reading reading from scripture is just
and again I believe it's the Holy Spirit, right Like
when I have absolutely when I have a body experience,
I feel like it's the Holy Spirit like coming into
my body, living in my heart.
Speaker 1 (39:27):
Right.
Speaker 2 (39:27):
So I just had one of those, and it's always
so profound because it's crazy.
Speaker 1 (39:32):
Like I get a little dizzy, yeah, and like I.
Speaker 4 (39:34):
Get chills, like I get like this asmr like tingle
up my spine.
Speaker 2 (39:38):
Yeah, my eyes start to water and this this always
happens to me when I when I'm in church too. Yeah,
I just cannot hold my emotions back. And it always
happens when people get baptized.
Speaker 3 (39:49):
Oh yeah, always, man.
Speaker 2 (39:51):
I just when when they're dipped into that water and
come you know, they come up clean.
Speaker 4 (39:56):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
I just it's just so beautiful. And so listen, guys,
if you're still here and you're still.
Speaker 3 (40:03):
Listening, we haven't lost. You haven't been like okay, and I.
Speaker 2 (40:06):
Know, you know some of the IF's this specific episode.
Some people will absolutely love it and some people turn
it off at the very beginning, which is totally fun.
Speaker 3 (40:14):
We still love you, we accept you, We do know.
Speaker 4 (40:17):
I mean, I'm not gonna stop talking about it. Here
and there. But we also have a lot of other,
you know, things to offer, a lot of psychology. We
have a lot of great guests that have expertise in
different areas that are going to be coming on. And
it's not just going to be all about God. But
I think God does play such a big role in
our lives that we can't not share it.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
That's right.
Speaker 3 (40:38):
He gave me this platform, he gave me this voice.
Speaker 4 (40:42):
Everything that has built this platform was built because God
saved me.
Speaker 1 (40:48):
God has turned every painful experience I've had in my
life into joy.
Speaker 4 (40:53):
And he promises to do that if you turn towards
Him and seek his character, because he doesn't just do
it for the random person that isn't seeking him, because
you can't hear him to go down the right road
to seek that redemption, you have to be able to
hear him and listen and allow him to guide you
(41:14):
to where the redemption lies. So you have to really
look at yourself and say, am I truly putting my
energy into seeking the character and nature of God? And
if the answer is no, then don't be surprised why
you don't experience redemption and blessings, because then you can't
hear his voice where he's saying, turn right, not left right,
because the redemption's over here on the right side.
Speaker 3 (41:36):
But you're over here on the left side, here.
Speaker 4 (41:37):
In the enemy's bitterness and accusation and rejection and jealousy
and all of the things over there.
Speaker 1 (41:44):
God lives within you.
Speaker 2 (41:45):
And if you are seeking more spiritual you know, just depth.
I think that doctor Hensley has wonderful services that can
help you. But again we want to emphasiz that she
has a completely secular way of doing things as well,
that you know, it's based strictly off the psychology, and.
Speaker 4 (42:07):
I let clients choose you want the psychology or you
want the spiritual version.
Speaker 1 (42:10):
I mean question on anybody.
Speaker 2 (42:11):
No, absolutely not well, I loved this episode too. I
feel really warm and fuzzy right now. So we hope
that you do too, and please you know, obviously you
can go you know the story now behind to love
DOOC twenty seven it's our holy spirit number.
Speaker 4 (42:29):
I see it every single time I look at the clock.
It's something twenty seven.
Speaker 1 (42:32):
Everywhere.
Speaker 4 (42:33):
If I look at the clock ten times a day,
seven out of ten it is a minute mark or
twenty seven. And I'm sorry but like that's statistically insane.
It means I agree, and it's it's just everywhere everywhere.
We see it everywhere, and you know, maybe there's a
little bit of a bias that you know, Okay, now
that we're kind of looking for it, we see it everywhere,
but it can't explain.
Speaker 1 (42:51):
It all now, absolutely not.
Speaker 4 (42:53):
So I don't know exactly what it all means. Maybe
we will know someday, maybe why that it's both shoved
in our faces like all the time and we're just
like twenty seven seven.
Speaker 1 (43:05):
I don't know that's an evolution, So we shall see.
Speaker 2 (43:08):
But please go use that code Love Doc twenty seven
and check out to check out doctor Hensley's services. And
please guys, continue to tune in. We have you know,
more series that we're gonna do. We don't know if
we're really gonna wrap this series up yet. We are
still waiting on some guests, so we shall see, but
stay tuned. Please go like check out our patreons account
(43:30):
at patreons dot com Slash the Love Dog Podcast. You
can sign up to be a free member or a
paid member. We would love your support, of course, and
then continue to just listen, like subscribe, leave us a comment.
Speaker 1 (43:42):
We have merch, Yes, we have merch.
Speaker 3 (43:44):
We have some really cute ones.
Speaker 2 (43:45):
Let's go check out our merch, and that's always evolving.
Our merch is always evolving. So I ordered us some stuff.
So I ordered us some hats, and we're gonna kind
of display some of it on the set. So please
go check all that out. And until next time, peace, love,
and perspective.
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