July 15, 2025 • 15 mins
Feeling stuck in the shame of not writing “enough”? In this episode, Lori Walker dismantles the myth of writing discipline and explores how to build a sustainable creative practice rooted in rhythm, curiosity, and compassion. It’s not about writing every day—it’s about finding your way back, again and again.
Visit thepoetrylab.com to find the Show Notes for this episode. The Poetry Lab Podcast is produced by Lori Walker and Danielle Mitchell. Hosted by Danielle Mitchell and Lori Walker, with special guest hosts bridgette bianca, Leonora Simonovis and Ravina Wadhwani.
Theme song: "Simply Upbeat" by Christian Telford, Kenneth Edward Belcher, and Saki Furuya.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
(00:00):
Are you exhausted by trying to force
yourself into a writing routine that
doesn't fit?
Maybe you've internalized the idea that
real writers
wake up early and write
every day because you've heard it 84,000
times before.
Maybe you've set up schedules and timers
(00:21):
and word count goals
only to watch them crash and burn after a
couple of days, if even that long.
And then
you blame yourself.
You tell yourself you are undisciplined,
lazy,
not serious about your craft.
What if the problem isn't you?
What if the problem is the myth of writing
(00:44):
discipline itself?
Welcome to the Poetry Lab Podcast.
Poetry Lab started 11 years ago to help
dedicated, self-taught, and formally
trained writers find a place in their
community to write,
(01:05):
read,
learn,
and collaborate.
We help writers tap into their craft with
radical self-compassion,
unlike anything you've ever seen in a
creative writing classroom before.
If you're a creative person trying to
establish a writing practice in the real world,
This podcast is designed to help you carve
(01:25):
out the time,
the courage,
and the inspiration to keep writing your
new shit.
Are you ready, poet?
Let's get into it.
Welcome, dear listeners, to another episode
of the Poetry Lab Podcast.
(01:47):
Lori here, and today we're talking about
something that still seems a little taboo
in writing circles,
and that's the myth
of discipline.
You've heard the advice.
Write every day.
Keep a routine.
Discipline equals freedom.
But here's the thing.
Most of that advice was written by people
(02:09):
with completely different lives and
responsibilities.
People who maybe don't have caregiving
duties, chronic illness, day jobs,
or unpredictable energy.
And here's the real kicker.
Not everyone creates best through routine.
Some of us
thrive in chaos.
(02:29):
We write in bursts.
Some of us write by voice note
on the go.
Some dream the whole damn thing
before ever touching the page.
Hell,
some people might not even use a page at all,
creating in other mediums instead.
And yet,
when we don't follow the rules,
(02:52):
we think we're not real writers.
That shit stops today, my friend.
let's look at why this myth is so
persistent
and cover some alternatives of what to do
instead.
So, what is the discipline myth
and where did it come from in the first place?
(03:14):
Well,
a writing routine as it's usually presented means
you sit down at the same time
every single day,
you write
for a
predetermined time limit,
or until you hit a certain word or page count.
You write whether or not you feel inspired.
(03:37):
You treat writing like a job because it's
serious and you're a serious
writer.
And listen, for some people, that works.
If that's you,
great.
Discipline is your bread and butter
and just
Carry on, my friend.
You do you.
(03:58):
That's great.
But for most of us,
especially creatives living messy lives,
this model just becomes another thing that
we're failing at.
And I don't know about you, but I already
feel like I'm failing at enough things.
I don't need to be failing
at my creativity.
(04:18):
Because here's the thing, we know that
writing isn't factory work.
Creativity is not linear,
and we aren't just robots churning out on
demand.
So where did this myth come from? Well,
it's a product of productivity culture,
of cash.
capitalism
(04:38):
of a worldview that measures success by
consistency and output.
And it erases the reality of creative
rhythm,
emotional cycles, and the unpredictable
nature of inspiration. And
by the way,
if you are looking for a
mind-blowing book on this topic,
(04:58):
I cannot recommend How to Do Nothing by
Ginny Odell highly enough.
Go get it and read it.
You'll love it.
Next up,
where does shame fit into the game?
What happens when you try to force yourself
into a discipline model that doesn't
fit?
You might start strong, maybe even excited.
(05:21):
You've got your calendar, your alarm, your
writing tracker.
Maybe you even bought new
writing supplies because this new notebook
or new pen will definitely change your life.
I've done it many times.
But I hate to break it to you
and to myself,
no shiny notebook is going to change the
(05:42):
fact that life
happens.
You miss a day or five,
and suddenly the inner critic kicks in.
You're lazy.
You're never going to finish that book.
Real writers don't miss a day, so obviously
you're not a real writer.
(06:02):
And just like that,
Writing becomes a source of shame instead
of a source of joy. What
was meant to support you
becomes another thing
you are behind on,
another weight, another failure.
And eventually,
that shame becomes so loud that you stop
(06:23):
writing altogether.
I run into this myself.
I have signed up for
NaNoWriMo.
I don't know how many times.
Sometimes I actually do get a pretty strong
start, but eventually
I miss a day.
And I think, you know what? I can make that up.
It's only 1600 words.
I can do that the next day,
but I don't.
So then I'm behind 3200 words
(06:44):
and then I'm behind 4800 words.
And then I just give up because I'm never
going to be able to catch up.
But here's the truth.
Consistency without compassion is just
punishment.
especially
when you've set up an extremely rigid
structure
that takes an all-or-nothing approach.
(07:05):
What you need isn't a stricter system.
What you need is a relationship with your
own creative rhythm.
How do you do this?
You start
listening.
You build a writing life based not on
discipline,
but on devotion,
curiosity,
attention.
(07:26):
I know, that all sounds well and good,
but how do you actually do that?
Here's a couple of tips.
First,
track your patterns, not your failures.
Instead of beating yourself up for not
writing daily,
ask,
When do I naturally feel inspired?
(07:47):
What days or times do I reach for the page
without
pressure?
Are there days that just don't work for me
because of this or that thing?
Instead of writing for two hours this
morning before yoga,
could I just write for one?
Start mapping out your flow,
(08:07):
not someone else's.
Second,
Use ritual
instead of routine.
Make your writing time feel
sacred,
not
scheduled.
Light a candle.
Put on music.
Use the same
pen or a special mug.
(08:29):
Let your body know
this is creativity time.
Personally, I've got a particular outfit
that makes me feel like a writer when I
wear it.
So if I'm feeling a bit
disconnected from my writing routine, I'm
not even routine, my writing ritual.
See
that
that productivity
(08:51):
language that's just so ingrained in us,
isn't it?
Whenever I'm feeling a bit disconnected
from my writing
ritual,
I put on this outfit
so that I remember,
damn it, I am a writer.
Third,
define success on your own terms.
Maybe success is a voice memo written while
(09:14):
walking your neighborhood.
Maybe it's finishing a scene or a poem.
Maybe it's just sitting down and being with
your work in progress, even if you don't
add more to it.
Maybe it's sitting down
to write
three times a week as opposed to demanding
a perfect five.
You get to decide.
(09:36):
Next,
let rest be part of the rhythm.
Rest isn't what happens when you fail to be
productive.
Often when we fail to be productive, we
start beating ourselves up.
I was supposed to write, but I was just too
tired, so I took the day off.
I mean, sometimes,
yes,
that decision is necessary,
(09:57):
but
when you find yourself regularly saying,
that you are just too tired to write during
your writing time,
that's a clue
that maybe your system needs tweaking.
And rest should be part of the process.
Rest is creative.
It's when we get inspired.
(10:18):
It's when the layering happens, the
daydreaming,
the spark that keeps us coming back to our work.
Finally,
reframe consistency.
And I kind of touched on this earlier, but
this means
instead of,
I write every day,
try,
I return to my work
(10:39):
often.
Or, I have a writing practice that bends,
not breaks.
That's still consistent.
It's just not punishing, and it's not an
all or nothing approach.
When you build a relationship with your own
rhythm, the writing becomes sustainable.
and sustainable is what gets things
(11:01):
finished.
Let's talk about how this all actually
plays out.
And we're going to do this with a little
multiple choice quiz question.
Which of these
is a creative
rhythm?
A slow Monday morning pre-write with a
(11:22):
Tuesday night session and bursts on the
weekends,
or
Writing while the baby or aging relative naps.
Or
reading all week, taking in creativity and
inspiration, and then writing
in one
big, glorious burst
(11:42):
on Sunday morning.
Or
one month of deep immersion followed by two
months of not writing at all.
Or
is it all of the above?
What do you think?
All of these are okay.
You are not inconsistent.
You are working in cycles.
(12:04):
The key is to notice your patterns,
honor them,
build around them instead of holding
yourself to some unattainable standard.
This doesn't mean never writing when it's hard.
Some days you'll write tired,
some days you'll show up out of sheer grit.
(12:25):
and not because you have some fantastic idea.
Some days
you'll go off on an unrelated tangent that
you needed to go on
to get that muck
out of your brain
before finding your way back
to your original point.
All of that
is different
from performing consistency for its own sake.
(12:50):
You don't need a word count goal,
you need a way back to yourself.
Let's recap.
The myth of writing discipline tells you
that real writers write every day,
that if you miss a day, you're behind,
or you're not a serious, real
(13:10):
writer,
and that routine is the
only way to succeed.
But the truth?
That only works for some people, and for
the rest of us,
It breeds shame, and that leads to
avoidance.
So what do we do instead?
We track our rhythms,
we create rituals, we redefine consistency,
(13:34):
we let rest be part of the process,
and most importantly,
we
return.
Over and over again and again, we return.
Because being a writer,
isn't about what you produce.
It's about how you keep coming home to the page.
(13:57):
It's engaging with this undeniable urge
inside of you.
Let your practice be messy.
Let it be yours
and let it be
alive.
If this episode cracked something open for
you or simply gave you permission to stop
punishing yourself,
(14:17):
please follow the show and leave a review
on your favorite platform.
And share it with a fellow creative
who's stuck in the shame spiral of not
writing
enough.
Maybe they need a gentler way back too.
You can find more episodes and free
creative resources at
(14:39):
thepoetrylab.com/podcast.
If you scroll about halfway down, you can
sign up for a curated playlist
on writing techniques, marketing tips, and
creative inspiration,
or all three.
You can find me on Instagram
@loriethewriter or on my website at
(15:01):
loriwriteswords.com.
And if you're not already subscribed to my
newsletter,
you can join the list over at
loriethewriter.substack.com.
Return to your page when you're ready.
Your words will wait.
I'll catch you next time at The Poetry Lab.
(15:22):
(00:00):
Are you exhausted by trying to force
yourself into a writing routine that
doesn't fit?
Maybe you've internalized the idea that
real writers
wake up early and write
every day because you've heard it 84,000
times before.
Maybe you've set up schedules and timers
(00:21):
and word count goals
only to watch them crash and burn after a
couple of days, if even that long.
And then
you blame yourself.
You tell yourself you are undisciplined,
lazy,
not serious about your craft.
What if the problem isn't you?
What if the problem is the myth of writing
(00:44):
discipline itself?
Welcome to the Poetry Lab Podcast.
Poetry Lab started 11 years ago to help
dedicated, self-taught, and formally
trained writers find a place in their
community to write,
(01:05):
read,
learn,
and collaborate.
We help writers tap into their craft with
radical self-compassion,
unlike anything you've ever seen in a
creative writing classroom before.
If you're a creative person trying to
establish a writing practice in the real world,
This podcast is designed to help you carve
(01:25):
out the time,
the courage,
and the inspiration to keep writing your
new shit.
Are you ready, poet?
Let's get into it.
Welcome, dear listeners, to another episode
of the Poetry Lab Podcast.
(01:47):
Lori here, and today we're talking about
something that still seems a little taboo
in writing circles,
and that's the myth
of discipline.
You've heard the advice.
Write every day.
Keep a routine.
Discipline equals freedom.
But here's the thing.
Most of that advice was written by people
(02:09):
with completely different lives and
responsibilities.
People who maybe don't have caregiving
duties, chronic illness, day jobs,
or unpredictable energy.
And here's the real kicker.
Not everyone creates best through routine.
Some of us
thrive in chaos.
(02:29):
We write in bursts.
Some of us write by voice note
on the go.
Some dream the whole damn thing
before ever touching the page.
Hell,
some people might not even use a page at all,
creating in other mediums instead.
And yet,
when we don't follow the rules,
(02:52):
we think we're not real writers.
That shit stops today, my friend.
let's look at why this myth is so
persistent
and cover some alternatives of what to do
instead.
So, what is the discipline myth
and where did it come from in the first place?
(03:14):
Well,
a writing routine as it's usually presented means
you sit down at the same time
every single day,
you write
for a
predetermined time limit,
or until you hit a certain word or page count.
You write whether or not you feel inspired.
(03:37):
You treat writing like a job because it's
serious and you're a serious
writer.
And listen, for some people, that works.
If that's you,
great.
Discipline is your bread and butter
and just
Carry on, my friend.
You do you.
(03:58):
That's great.
But for most of us,
especially creatives living messy lives,
this model just becomes another thing that
we're failing at.
And I don't know about you, but I already
feel like I'm failing at enough things.
I don't need to be failing
at my creativity.
(04:18):
Because here's the thing, we know that
writing isn't factory work.
Creativity is not linear,
and we aren't just robots churning out on
demand.
So where did this myth come from? Well,
it's a product of productivity culture,
of cash.
capitalism
(04:38):
of a worldview that measures success by
consistency and output.
And it erases the reality of creative
rhythm,
emotional cycles, and the unpredictable
nature of inspiration. And
by the way,
if you are looking for a
mind-blowing book on this topic,
(04:58):
I cannot recommend How to Do Nothing by
Ginny Odell highly enough.
Go get it and read it.
You'll love it.
Next up,
where does shame fit into the game?
What happens when you try to force yourself
into a discipline model that doesn't
fit?
You might start strong, maybe even excited.
(05:21):
You've got your calendar, your alarm, your
writing tracker.
Maybe you even bought new
writing supplies because this new notebook
or new pen will definitely change your life.
I've done it many times.
But I hate to break it to you
and to myself,
no shiny notebook is going to change the
(05:42):
fact that life
happens.
You miss a day or five,
and suddenly the inner critic kicks in.
You're lazy.
You're never going to finish that book.
Real writers don't miss a day, so obviously
you're not a real writer.
(06:02):
And just like that,
Writing becomes a source of shame instead
of a source of joy. What
was meant to support you
becomes another thing
you are behind on,
another weight, another failure.
And eventually,
that shame becomes so loud that you stop
(06:23):
writing altogether.
I run into this myself.
I have signed up for
NaNoWriMo.
I don't know how many times.
Sometimes I actually do get a pretty strong
start, but eventually
I miss a day.
And I think, you know what? I can make that up.
It's only 1600 words.
I can do that the next day,
but I don't.
So then I'm behind 3200 words
(06:44):
and then I'm behind 4800 words.
And then I just give up because I'm never
going to be able to catch up.
But here's the truth.
Consistency without compassion is just
punishment.
especially
when you've set up an extremely rigid
structure
that takes an all-or-nothing approach.
(07:05):
What you need isn't a stricter system.
What you need is a relationship with your
own creative rhythm.
How do you do this?
You start
listening.
You build a writing life based not on
discipline,
but on devotion,
curiosity,
attention.
(07:26):
I know, that all sounds well and good,
but how do you actually do that?
Here's a couple of tips.
First,
track your patterns, not your failures.
Instead of beating yourself up for not
writing daily,
ask,
When do I naturally feel inspired?
(07:47):
What days or times do I reach for the page
without
pressure?
Are there days that just don't work for me
because of this or that thing?
Instead of writing for two hours this
morning before yoga,
could I just write for one?
Start mapping out your flow,
(08:07):
not someone else's.
Second,
Use ritual
instead of routine.
Make your writing time feel
sacred,
not
scheduled.
Light a candle.
Put on music.
Use the same
pen or a special mug.
(08:29):
Let your body know
this is creativity time.
Personally, I've got a particular outfit
that makes me feel like a writer when I
wear it.
So if I'm feeling a bit
disconnected from my writing routine, I'm
not even routine, my writing ritual.
See
that
that productivity
(08:51):
language that's just so ingrained in us,
isn't it?
Whenever I'm feeling a bit disconnected
from my writing
ritual,
I put on this outfit
so that I remember,
damn it, I am a writer.
Third,
define success on your own terms.
Maybe success is a voice memo written while
(09:14):
walking your neighborhood.
Maybe it's finishing a scene or a poem.
Maybe it's just sitting down and being with
your work in progress, even if you don't
add more to it.
Maybe it's sitting down
to write
three times a week as opposed to demanding
a perfect five.
You get to decide.
(09:36):
Next,
let rest be part of the rhythm.
Rest isn't what happens when you fail to be
productive.
Often when we fail to be productive, we
start beating ourselves up.
I was supposed to write, but I was just too
tired, so I took the day off.
I mean, sometimes,
yes,
that decision is necessary,
(09:57):
but
when you find yourself regularly saying,
that you are just too tired to write during
your writing time,
that's a clue
that maybe your system needs tweaking.
And rest should be part of the process.
Rest is creative.
It's when we get inspired.
(10:18):
It's when the layering happens, the
daydreaming,
the spark that keeps us coming back to our work.
Finally,
reframe consistency.
And I kind of touched on this earlier, but
this means
instead of,
I write every day,
try,
I return to my work
(10:39):
often.
Or, I have a writing practice that bends,
not breaks.
That's still consistent.
It's just not punishing, and it's not an
all or nothing approach.
When you build a relationship with your own
rhythm, the writing becomes sustainable.
and sustainable is what gets things
(11:01):
finished.
Let's talk about how this all actually
plays out.
And we're going to do this with a little
multiple choice quiz question.
Which of these
is a creative
rhythm?
A slow Monday morning pre-write with a
(11:22):
Tuesday night session and bursts on the
weekends,
or
Writing while the baby or aging relative naps.
Or
reading all week, taking in creativity and
inspiration, and then writing
in one
big, glorious burst
(11:42):
on Sunday morning.
Or
one month of deep immersion followed by two
months of not writing at all.
Or
is it all of the above?
What do you think?
All of these are okay.
You are not inconsistent.
You are working in cycles.
(12:04):
The key is to notice your patterns,
honor them,
build around them instead of holding
yourself to some unattainable standard.
This doesn't mean never writing when it's hard.
Some days you'll write tired,
some days you'll show up out of sheer grit.
(12:25):
and not because you have some fantastic idea.
Some days
you'll go off on an unrelated tangent that
you needed to go on
to get that muck
out of your brain
before finding your way back
to your original point.
All of that
is different
from performing consistency for its own sake.
(12:50):
You don't need a word count goal,
you need a way back to yourself.
Let's recap.
The myth of writing discipline tells you
that real writers write every day,
that if you miss a day, you're behind,
or you're not a serious, real
(13:10):
writer,
and that routine is the
only way to succeed.
But the truth?
That only works for some people, and for
the rest of us,
It breeds shame, and that leads to
avoidance.
So what do we do instead?
We track our rhythms,
we create rituals, we redefine consistency,
(13:34):
we let rest be part of the process,
and most importantly,
we
return.
Over and over again and again, we return.
Because being a writer,
isn't about what you produce.
It's about how you keep coming home to the page.
(13:57):
It's engaging with this undeniable urge
inside of you.
Let your practice be messy.
Let it be yours
and let it be
alive.
If this episode cracked something open for
you or simply gave you permission to stop
punishing yourself,
(14:17):
please follow the show and leave a review
on your favorite platform.
And share it with a fellow creative
who's stuck in the shame spiral of not
writing
enough.
Maybe they need a gentler way back too.
You can find more episodes and free
creative resources at
(14:39):
thepoetrylab.com/podcast.
If you scroll about halfway down, you can
sign up for a curated playlist
on writing techniques, marketing tips, and
creative inspiration,
or all three.
You can find me on Instagram
@loriethewriter or on my website at
(15:01):
loriwriteswords.com.
And if you're not already subscribed to my
newsletter,
you can join the list over at
loriethewriter.substack.com.
Return to your page when you're ready.
Your words will wait.
I'll catch you next time at The Poetry Lab.
(15:22):
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