Go Heart or Go Home

This week, Scottie and Sylvia reflect on the wild highs and lows of 2023. From heartbreaks and new loves, to surrendering to life’s surprises, the girls grapple with the many questions and answers this year offered them. Later, they turn it up with a couple games — and no ball or yt mess is off the table.    

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Episode Transcript

(00:10):
Welcome to the Scotty and Sylvia Show. When we speak our minds like it's
our full time jobs and have somuch fun doing it. I'm Scottie Beam.
I am just a beam of lightright now. I feel great.
So I am just Scotty a girlwho feels amazing, that's it. And

(00:31):
I'm Sylvia Obell, a girl who'swondering why John the Maid just told that
white girl to be like Coretta ScottKing and Michelle Obama. Welcome, Welcome,
everybody here. I it just can'tleave my psyche that he told that

(00:54):
white woman to be his Corena ScottKing. It's like, what did that
mean? That's my question? Whatdid you mean by that? Like overlook
out here, stand beside Martin LutherKing called a wild stray from the affter
life. Like I'm like, Iknow. He was like, what the

(01:14):
fuck did I have to do this? And karate they're still evoking my day
and to see, oh, thiswas not part of the dream. This
was not part of the dream.We did not have a dream saying that.
They keep saying that Martin was outhere, you know, stand by
me, but Barack sures Hell wasn't. So what Michelle got to do with

(01:37):
it, right, They said,just if you want a woman to stand
by your graceful like these black womenmaybe dand black woman. Well, I
don't know. Michelle just said thatshe couldn't stay that nigga for twenty years
but still still beside him. Sohere's that's what I mean. But that's
what he wants, That's what I'msaying. I think, Oh, yeah,
that's all want. Let me dowhatever I want to do and stand
beside me while I do it,and make you look like a fucking fool,

(01:57):
A crazy thing to want both awhite woman and Corona Scott King at
the same time. But I digress. Hey friend, how you doing this
week? Friend? How you feel? I feel good? I feel great.
I'm excited. I come and seemy friends tomorrow. You know,
I'm out in LA every month thisyear, every month this year, every

(02:23):
month of this year. Is it? This is my curtain call? Is
it? I'm done till January?Where shall be back? Literally insane?
And we start again in twenty twentyfour? True? True? But I
feel good, you know, planninga few trips out, have a good
time, and that was it.How are you feeling? I am well,

(02:46):
you know, I have been reallyprioritizing sleep, yes, and like
really emphasizing the D and D onmy phone these past couple of weeks,
and it's been just superb, youknow, like shut. I have just
been because you know, we werejust all over the place. So to
just feel caught up on rest justfeel so lovely. I'm like, that's

(03:07):
what December and January for me,like holiday time. Like it's like cozy
in the house. My tree isup. Just ordered a black tree.
It's on the way. Hey,okay, on the way my black tree.
Listen love to hear that. Youknow, No, I went black

(03:28):
over black is fine. That waswhen you said white. You said something
by a white It's called a frostedtree. No, I don't mind the
green tree that's frosted, but awhole white tree is crazy. The black
I can live with that. Idon't know. It's called me old fashioned.
You know, you know I lovea green It's a green tree fake
always. I'm behind that. Butno, I'm good. So other than

(03:54):
that, Yes, I'm rested.I'm good. I have been joined having
some quiet weekends. I did alittle solo Saturday. I meant the whole
solo weekend. I was by myself. Well so for Friday. Oh,
I went to see Kid Fury standup at the Hollywood Improv on Friday and
it was so good. Kid Congratulations. Kid Fury like congratulations, But I

(04:18):
am just so what why are y'allnot having shows in New York? What
the fuck do y'all have against NewYork? Kid Fury? He lives in
La now, baby baby, ButCrystal don't and and Chrystal need to put
it together. We are all experiencingthe same split in our podcasts us in

(04:41):
three. We need to get somework group together. No. Yes,
Kifury did a great job. Iwas like, those tickets so are so
fast. But shout out to myhomegirl Jessica. She had tickets that she
knew I was a fan. Threewas like, hey, do you want
to come? And I was likeabsolutely, And I have never been to

(05:01):
that improv. It was funny,it was he I really want to say
quills to Kid Fury for finding away to take the story of his time
at Coachella, which he has sharedwith his listeners and followers that he had
a suicide attempt during Coachella and andthen you know went to rehab after that.
So like he makes that whole storythe stand up. Wow, he

(05:28):
finds he found a way to hisbrilliance to do that and not make it
too dark, but also like makeit decisile and to find the humor.
It's just it really just speaks toBlack like we can be laughing to keep
for crying. But like he hedid it in such a smart way,
like it was. It was Iwas entertained. It was great, and
it was so good to see thesupport and for him to feel that loving

(05:49):
person and to like, I'm justso glad to you know, exist at
the same time as Kid Fury.What a treasure him and Crystal, they
are just legend in the game,legends, incredible examples to look up to
for real. So the yeah,that's what I did this week. Other

(06:10):
than that, I was just home, you know, I was doing my
girl, like my solo girl.Shit. I went so Beyonce again because
the h you know and all thestuff. But there's been a lot going
going on in the web. Fear, in the world Wide Web. The
fucking world has been talking all day, not stop nus yes, yes,

(06:31):
no. The Golden Globes twenty twentyfour Golden gold nominations are out literally today
as we're recording. Shout out tothe color Purples, Fantasia and Danielle Brooks.
The second I saw that ass screenand I was like, give Danielle
all the things, give her allthe things I can immediately as seen stealer

(06:57):
a star. I am so excitedfor this award season. Then for her,
they better do fucking right by theblack nominees this year, because we
know how the Foreign Press Association lovesto play. Yeah, yeah, they
all love to play. They loveto give us nominations and not awards.
But I'm hoping for different this time. Fantasia got her very first ever also

(07:17):
Golden Globe nomination. Her interviews havebeen making me cry. I cannot testimony
after testimony, it's really like everyevery it's like a it's like a Karen
Sheard song. Every time she openedher mouth, it's like I just moved
by the gospel of Fantasia, liketruly a phoenix. I'm so glad that,

(07:41):
Like when Elle used it as hercover peop, I was like,
yes, the phoenix, like literallyjust rise and rise from ashes. So
glad she did this, So gladshe's getting her dress due shout out to
her. We never really spoke aboutthe power of American idol. We never
one day we will talk because aboutit was a time, really it was

(08:03):
people really had to be there thevoice it is not you know what I
mean? Like and there was theEric. There was the era where American
I don't stopped pushing up people thosefirst years. Yeah, well strong strong
candidate Kelly Clarkson what Jennifer Hudson didn'teven win but started Okay, okay,

(08:26):
well but I will. That wastwo thousand and four, and I was
sick of it. Oh that's rightup there with Neo's so sick because y'all
wouldn't stop playing it. I lovedit in the beginning, but by the

(08:50):
end of those years, I wasready to I was. I am the
one who was so sick. II'm sorry, please, it's two thousand
and five. Drop. I wasthick of it. I see Simon cow
didn't get an invite. But youknow that's whatever Calman Domingo for rusting for

(09:13):
the Golden Globes. Listen, ever, have we ever thirsted over a man
who does not want us like this? I don't think so it's between him
and Dustin Okay, yes, DustinRoss, you know I love him so
much. I tweeted, I tweetedand said, gay niggas be so fine.

(09:35):
It don't make no, I didn'tsee that tweet. It don't And
them niggas don't want me? Man, No, why you sounding like Will
Smith on the why didn't want me? I'm just like, Wow, they're
just so good, Domingo, justand just they dress that's about well,

(09:56):
taylored one, because they're not afraidto take the fashion risks. Coleman and
Mingo at the Color Purple premiere.Yep, that with the ox blood burgundy.
I don't know whoa wow, finetalented black man contains multitude and that

(10:18):
must I don't even love a mustachea beer, But with Coleman, I
do it, I do, wedo. It's a whisper. Please in
case to mix it up, I'lljump in if need be that you're wait

(10:39):
in the back for your turn,just here, please don't mind me.
But yeah, So congrats to allthe abbed elementary of course, duh shout
out to the Bear stars. Ioh, I do not want to mess
up your last name, So I'mjust gonna say, I a girl,

(11:01):
love your work, Love your work. And Jeremy Allen White, who is
another one who I can't really putmy finger on why. I find him
somewhat trashed black but do No,we'll get to it. But that's why
I said, I'm confused. Butthe Bear this season was amazing. Love
that show. Shout out to them. They both deserve these nominations. I

(11:24):
don't know why we keep calling itthe comedy. It's weird. I think
it's because it's like a thirty minutedrama. They don't know what to do
with it. But that show isnot It was a comedy, then that's
just a dark comedy. But Ihave a good time. But yeah,
So those are some of the nomineesthat matter to us. Shout out to
you know, also everybody black whowas nominated. We're all, you know,

(11:45):
always rooting for that. What elseis going on? Oh, you
know, speaking of confusing white people. No, what I watched May December.
May December is a about now millennialStick with me, gen z sit
down for a tale. We're justlooking at that at this fire store.

(12:07):
We're just googround on TikTok oh no, looking at it on TikTok, that's
what y'll do. But you know, there was a teacher. No,
this is a woman. I don'teven know she was a teacher, but
she I think she owned the pets, like she worked at the pet store.
And this boy who was like thirteentimes when they started sucking around,

(12:28):
and this was a real life story. She got arrested because they got caught,
and she was married at the time, had her own kids and family.
She was like in her thirties,which is crazy, and you know,
got pregnant by him, had thebaby, was on probation, go
on probation, was supposed to notsee him. Saw that and you saw

(12:48):
that man anyway, got pregnant byhim again, went to jail for like
seven years, came out, theyhad some more and was married for like
ten years. Like this shit wasnormal, and then he divorced her.
Yes, I think, yes,he got finally got free. And the
movie really does do a good jobof unraveling it from like, oh,

(13:09):
this was a love story to like, no, this is manipulative child's abuse,
and like this is grooming. Thisyoung man has lost half his life.
It's just so gross and like thatNatalie Portman Charles Melton, who plays
the grown up version of the boy, and Julianne Moore, who plays the

(13:31):
woman. They all brought their bestacting to the table, because if there's
anybody who's gonna give you a twistedwhite woman, it's Natalie Portman. But
I tweeted this and this going viralright now. I feel like a lot
of people are feeling me on theway HBO continues to try to make me
care about wealthy white families, andlike they can't keep getting away with this,

(13:54):
and this that they're getting away withis that I do be caring.
Like the amount of white fan wealthyfamilies I find myself invested in on HBO
is crazy right now, speaking ofthe Gilded Age, because Sunday one of
the families about to lose their fortune, and I call myself being like,

(14:15):
no, not the money, likenot the inheritance. What are we gonna
do? Who's gonna take care ofthis and that? And how are these
women going to survive? These theseclasses old money white bitches. And I
over here stressed. And it's notthe first time succession they had me ruined

(14:35):
for your shim Roy, It's crazy. I never voting against money all of
them will voting against my rights.And a second immediately not rooty. Yes,
and I got I know one thatdid get your Game of Thrones.
Yep, the wealthy castle living aswhite families. Baby we was invested.

(15:01):
And that goes right on the houseof Dragon. They got us again because
the way I've been waiting for thiswater to kick off, because they got
her baby boy eating up by thatdragon, still mad like it was my
kid. And that's crazy. That'scrazy. So and that's not it.
White lotus care, wealthy white families, wealthy white people, wealthy white bearriages.

(15:24):
Alright, panitanya. I don't knowif it's so much care or do
we see? I like, no, I can't care. When I watched
Succession, I just like to sayI knew the white people were doing this
shit. I knew they was doingthis shit. That's all you come they
make sure. That's why I appreciatethe final seas in Succession and rubbed that

(15:45):
baths under your nose and remind youthat these niggas is trashed all of them.
But somewhere in the middle of thatseries, I was caught up.
I was like, no, thisperson must win over here telling bad for
all of them until they let thatfake Trump care. They're getting to off
like they was willing to body electionand ship. I was like snapped up.

(16:06):
And it's really sick that I wasthe biggest fan of the worst person
on the show, which is thefather. I wanted him to live so
bad. You born that white man, that old white man. I'm it's
not dead. He is not dead. It's not possible. We crying over

(16:30):
this as character real Like I wasupsets, man, I was. It
got me wearing compression socks on everyplane. Real. I mean, listen,
speak about Karen with the website theinternet wants us to care about.
Is Cardi B leaving her husband?Here's the thing, honey, I don't

(16:53):
care. And I love Cardi Bto death, I swear I do.
I love her, But I thinkwhat this has shown us throughout this year,
in all the other years, isthat now so every time they do
this, I'm just it's just like, okay, girl, if you say

(17:14):
this, okay, right, noright to him? All right, you
do it, you go pack yourstuff, says, I will believe it.
Give if she three sixty five,I'll consider the options and what it
means. I will give that shedoes look fed up in the way of

(17:38):
she's calm about it this time.And they do talk about how like when
a woman's enraged, you know youcan have her back. I would think
of that meme where it's like,if all your clothes are spread out across
the lawn, you still have achance if they are folded up neatly outside
that door packed. It's over,baby, It's just really done. And

(18:02):
it's given. She's folding the clothespact the time she was on that IG
live like yeah, guys, soit's been a little bit now, but
this Christian Rock rumor is what madeher speak up. And you know,
everything I know about Christian Rock andBlue Face, I know it gets my
will. I don't follow either ofthose. I don't follow either of them.

(18:22):
I have blocked every name and theystilled both names, and somehow they
still pop up on my smrmites thatwon't get out. I can't. It's
just like ants, like a getout of here. It's just I don't
know. I will say it's funnythat Offset was who usually speak out.

(18:44):
I've never seen Offset deny something fasterthan when Blue Face said that Christian Rock
and him had sex a week ago. He said, hey, my man,
absolutely not, and you need togo get help, to be honest,
because this is crazy blue We allknow blue Face be spiraling and just
lying on his baby mama's and thenthey be taking them back, and then
he'd be lying. I just prayfor the children. I pray for the

(19:04):
children, and I pray for Cardiopskids. I mean they're gonna be a
bit borre. I mean they aretaking they are good money wise, and
I you know, I think they'reboth good parents, at least those two
Cardian offst So yeah, circle backto that. We'll see, We'll see,
we'll see. Because because Libra womenindecisive, Wooden comes to love that

(19:33):
TikTok that you share, that realthat you said. Everybody was said to
you. Oh yeah, because weare very insole. And that's why I
said maybe once, maybe she's finally, but maybe she's not no coming back.
Yeah, she's married. You gottarumber that too. You gotta do

(19:55):
all the stuff to divorce this man. Every step you know, that's crazy.
You know how crazy that is,tom Over every decision, every step
like oh, separation and the separation. We have to monitor, we have
to do this mediation thing. Wegot to sit here. We gotta that
is too much divorce immediate. Idon't want to look at you. Happen,

(20:18):
child. I hope so, Ihope so to keep him cheaper,
to keep him. At this point, you know we're talking about but that

(20:41):
man off Megos catalog for a longtime. That boy is pushing his music
like never before. I ain't neverseen this man on a press run,
like how he's been on a pressrun and wearing Michael Jackson every day.
That boy is very committed. Lee. Please let that boy get his coin,
and I hope if they divorce,he keeps his own little moneies.

(21:04):
Okay, well listen. It's reallywild is that we are almost done with
the year, guys, our firstseason. We're almost done, Tylvio.
I really like this whole year isflying by. I know we've been saying
this for like at least six monthsevery month, especially the fall, like

(21:26):
what September came around, September,October and November. Those three birds,
I don't like. It was rudehow fast they got up out of here.
Like I am still like in Augustsomewhere, Labor Day somewhere trying to
figure out how we are already atthe holiday season, like it's flying by

(21:49):
like that, so you know,and they said as you get older,
time goes by faster and faster.And I feel that because the end of
the year, like it coincides likeI basically a new year. I'm not
a new year baby, but I'mclose enough, like I'm about to be
thirty four. Two months it listened, two months, it's given middle thirties.

(22:14):
Oh, thirty four is crazy.I just don't even so, Yes,
I'm feeling it. I'm feeling it. I'm really just a girl,
like well, we got to backit up a little bit. Okay,

(22:37):
we have to do a little walkdown memory four. Okay, I almost
said forty four. It was crazy. That's what I'm saying. We have
to slow it down, reflect onall that twoenty and twenty three gave us
and what we can do without,because I'm sure there's a lot of things
that we can literally leave in twentytwenty three that I can't wait. I

(23:02):
haven't seen our girl on the stepsyet, and when she's leaving, I
can't wait. See, I can'twait to see how this year. I
feel like you're taking your time withit like you got some some fire,
some hoigh fire coming our way.So let's but let's get you know,
they can't wait to drop that shit. Twenty twenty three is flying out of

(23:30):
here. And when we thought aboutthe ups and downs of this year,
we're really inspired by this quote byZora Neil Hurston that really comes to mind
to me at the end and topof every year, which is like there
are years that ask questions and yearsthat answer. And so Scotti a year
ago, as we were heating attwenty twenty three, I want to start

(23:52):
this comment by asking what kind ofyear did you think it was going to
be for you? Take it backto Janu. I'm weary first twenty twenty
three, so I was already inthe thick of it around that time.
I think depression was doing the meanesthoop on my ever. And what'sn't incredible

(24:22):
is that I'm able to I documenta lot of things, like in my
notes app whenever I'm feeling like,you know, just remember this when a
year from now or two years fromnow, whatever. So December twenty six,
twenty twenty two, I said,dear self, you are already in

(24:42):
it. You just have to getthrough it. So I was adamant on
I think getting through the depression thatI was feeling around that time. I
thought this year would be the yearwhere I ride is from the ashes like
a phoenix out of depression, andI am able and I'm able to have

(25:07):
all these opportunities. I'm working allthe time and I'm doing all the things,
and the relationship is there and everythingis working out, and it just
it was supposed to like really allmake sense this year for me, and
so I thought that's what my yearwas going to be about. What about

(25:30):
you, Sylvia? I think Ipray that this year would be a year
of answers and not questions. Alot of I felt like the twenty twenty
two I'm gonna wait year, thisis twenty twenty two had left me with
so many questions that I was like, please Lord, some answers twenty three
just a few like when are wegoing to start the podcast? Right?

(25:52):
And like, you know that didget answered? You know what I mean?
I think, I think, youknow, this year answered a lot
of questions, and but I thinkthe thing about the way it's like divided
like that is like I think theremay be years that like solely asked questions,
and there maybe years that like answerbig answers, but I also think

(26:14):
that there's years in between those thatare like a hybrid and that like do
both and then something like and usuallyanswers lead to more questions, especially for
somebody like me, you know,we love a follow up question. I
think this idea that when we kindof like romanticize, oh, this was
a year that answered or like thisis the year everything's gonna fall into place,
like you were saying, like,it's like that's that's not how life

(26:37):
works, is how I'm realizing asan adult. And I think, like
it's like what would be the pointof the journey if it was that easy?
Is the thing where it was likeif everything came together at once,
like things things please come together,But like I understand like more so like
the process of it coming together ina way that won't makes sense to me

(27:00):
always, but it's supposed to belike divine timing. And I think that,
like, you know, for me, I was hoping that this year
would like additionally coming in it wouldbe like answers fix everything. I remember,
I supposed to like this top ofthe year, I did like a
movie board, and one of thethings, one of the gospel songs that

(27:21):
was in my head heavy at topof the year was like, I'm reaping
the promise. I'm reaping the harvest. God promised me take back what the
devil stole from me for the gospelchoir kids in the back, and I
rejoiced to day yep, I know, I don't, you know, just

(27:41):
for people who can't. It's hardto say that without finishing it out.
But like I wanted. I wantedthings back that I felt like were taking
for me. And I do feellike I got some of those things back,
and that feels good. But Ialso think that there are things where
God is clearly being like not yet, and I have to learn how to
sit with that and change my perspectiveon whateverse is. Because in the Zora's

(28:06):
like quote, too, I oftenthink about getting answers to questions that you
haven't even asked yet, or alsoanticipating answers to go the way that you
think that it needs to be answered, and then that ain't the answer right,

(28:29):
and it goes to your point,which is like that's where most of
all of the questions come from.Too. For me is Okay, I'm
anticipating this answer, not a answer, this answer, this one, this
one. Yeah. Right. SoGod is like, nah, we're gonna
give you a answer, and itain't gonna be this one, which is
going to give me more questions becauseI think it'll come back around to me.

(28:53):
Why did I Why did I thinkthat this was supposed to be the
answer? Why I'm just not okaywith releasing control and letting just God have
the last say instead of me thinkingthat it needs to be this answer for
me to be able to be okaybecause I've had a lot of no's this

(29:14):
year and where God said, mmmm, this nope, huh, and I've
said, oh, well, howam I supposed to live? Then?
How existing is? I feel likeI'm in the middle of a sermon.
Oh God, that is Jeremiah twentynine. Gods, I know the plan.

(29:36):
No, but Dad's Jeremiah twenty nine, my favorite, one of my
favorite verses of the Bible. Godsays, I know the plans I have
for you, plans to prosper andno harm. And it's that it's it's
It's one of the scriptures that oftenI try to center myself on when things
are crazy because it's like I knowthat the bigger plan that like is going

(30:00):
to work for my good if Ijust try to stay the path of my
purpose. And so I think thateven my relationship with God changes my relationship
with adversity. So I think it'smade me have a different relationship with the
years that ask questions or there aremore questions that leave me more confused.

(30:22):
And I think I'm learning to tryto make peace with the years that ask
more questions than they answer. Inmy thirties, I'm learning to make more
peace with them and have appreciate theimportance of both. It's like the valleys
come, but I always try tomind myself that between each valleys are two
mountains. Every time, Yeah,I think, yeah, I agree.

(30:45):
I think a lot of what yougo through is in preparation for your blessing
in the future. I just wantto be prepared. I think a lot
of times I do pray for thatthe most, Lord, let me be
prepared for this. And also Ithink there are other ways to prepare.

(31:08):
I think I always think preparation meansstrength, Like I just got to be
strong. I need strength. Sowhatever we're going to be put through,
I just need to be strong enoughto pull through and go through this,
But there are so many other thingsthat you can have. And speaking,
I'm telling you that episode boo hwhich one? Which one? Astrology one?

(31:36):
I I don't think anyone really knewhow much that slapped me in my
face. So I think also,I think there are two that half of
the year like this. The fronthalf m hm was way more of a
mess than my second half. Yeah, the second half starting to put AI

(32:00):
on where the pain is coming from, and also applying forgiveness where I need
it, as like a band aidor as something to heal, a healing
ointment on it. I try tothink of it as that because I think
in order to be ready, Ineed to forgive a lot of things,
and it starts with myself first.So I've been doing a lot of forgiving

(32:22):
myself this year, and so Ithink that's what this year is supposed to
meet. Well, the second halfof it. I don't know the first
half, baby, but the secondhalf I am definitely gonna say that.
God was like, this is goingto be your forgiving year for you.
You need to forgive yourself for something. Well from the was there something specific

(32:45):
from the birdchar episode. What wasthe specific thing that slept? Was it
all of it or was it likeit was the strength one it was?
There is no way to describe me. When somebody says describe yourself and say
who you are, the first thingI think about is I'm very strong.
I'm strong. I'm strong, andalthough I'm very sensitive emotional, I have

(33:10):
a strength that is pretty impressive.And that's my gold star, so which
means I'm holding up a lot ofmy traumas as stars, like I went
through this and I've made right.These are my trophies. I went through

(33:30):
all this and I still am hereand also here and also like I wear
them as a badge of honor,and I have to figure out why is
that even though strength is admirable,it's amazing to have, it's great to
have, what else do you have? I want to explore that more.

(33:52):
And also I think the road todoing that is forgiving a lot of stuff.
I think a lot of that iswrapped up in my A lot of
the times you had really strong.I think there's something really powerful you said
that, like spoke to some ofmy notes too, as I was journaling
about this past year, which islike Nobody really talks about where you finally

(34:16):
find yourself getting out of slightly survivalmode, and then all the things that
you were ignoring to survive catch upto you, you know what I mean,
Like there's like a plateau moment whereyou take a deep breath and you're
like, okay, like I'm doingall right, Like I'm here, I'm
here, things are happening, I'mmaking a little like you know, I
don't have to like work myself tothe bone and like, so what I'm

(34:38):
trying to rest and incorporate, youknow, softer things into my life.
And you sit still long enough torealize, like, oh, shoot,
like there's certain issues or trauma orchallenges from the time that you were surviving
that you collected along the way,and like you said about forgiving yourself or

(34:58):
doing the best you had with whatyou had, like you were just trying,
you have to, Like I hadto suppress things to just achieve to
just I wasn't gonna be able todo both. I could not face all
of what, like I all ofwhatever I had just come out of at
eighteen to like or twenty two orwhatever, and then make it. I

(35:20):
was like, I gotta I haveto make it. And then now it's
like all of the things from myyoung adulthood or my youth that I've tucked
away under like a weighted blanket.I occasionally feed it would comfort food,
you know, a comment down withthe occasional jay or nightcap. It's like
just to keep it at base successfullywhile I was in survival mode. It's

(35:43):
like now I'm like sitting still longenough to be like, oh, those
things are not just gonna go away, like and I think one of the
questions that were hardest for me tounderstand and make sense of this year was
one or things. I don't knowif it's a question, but like that
my therapist said to me this year, that's just ooh, slap me,
almost like that Birch episode which waslike which also slapped me, but it

(36:07):
kind of goes hand in hand.It was like, I've called myself a
recovering people please are on this podcasta lot, and I think, like,
not continuing to do it is thefirst step, right, But then
there's the back half of like whoyou've what you've suppressed about yourself to have
been that person in the past,and people learning who you really are now

(36:29):
that you're not just pleasing everybody andlike there's coming to terms but not feeling
ashamed of having disagreeable feelings of suppressedanger. Like one of the things I
admire most about you was like yourfire, like your passion, Like I
know that you say that it havethis pros and its cons, but like

(36:51):
you're you are not afraid to getangry, like when it's important or to
stand up for yourself, you knowwhat I mean, Like in moments where
where it's like I'm passionate about this, I feel this way and you won't
hear about it and the way Ifeel about it and I don't care.
It's like that I don't like,but it's it's an important part to have,

(37:12):
and I feel like I actually realizedI was thinking. I was,
like a lot of my friends arelike that, and I think it's because
I admire that about y'all because it'ssomething I haven't been able to do for
myself, like in the sense oflike I have a really hard time like
when I get like expressing my anger, I have a really hard time never

(37:37):
see angry, Like I like,like I even like like I get ticked
off, but to like lose itcompletely. It's something that I was just
I have bolted that part of medown so deep and I'm just like because
I've told myself or life has taughtme that, like you can't afford to

(38:00):
fly, you have to handle andit's just like but sometimes it's like everybody
deserves, like to to make peacewith that. Probably everybody deserves to get
angry. It's not a bad thing. You're not a bad person when you
get angry. And I think thatis something that I have realized is a
lot like I have to like freemyself from right like that I can have

(38:22):
disagreeable feelings and still be allowed tobe loved, accepted, seeing as a
good person because the things I've toldmyself to Yes, it's a natural emotion
human And I would hope that everybodyknows that when you just you should.

(38:43):
I would hope that, including myself, you feel all emotions and be able
to do what's the last time youscreamed? So, yeah, like screamed,
not like screamed at somebody with words. I'm saying, scream Like I'm
laughing at myself because there's times whereI've seen the thing where the women in
the movies should scream, and I'lltry to do it like sometimes like if

(39:07):
I'm home by myself, and I'llbe too afraid that I'm going to disturb
my neighbors. That's what I'm saying. Like I'm still thinking about everybody I
say, not saying. That's whatI'm saying. It's just you're not saying
scream every day. That's when itinvolved, right, Yeah, No,
the fact that one time you can'tgive yourself just just relieve yourself one time,

(39:30):
one time. And I know Ineed a good screen. I probably
really use a good scream. SometimesI just take the pillow. Oh yeah,
and I yell so loud. I'mpretty sure they still hear it,
but I don't because I am justso mad and that's the only way to

(39:50):
get some things out out. Yeah. But yeah, And I think that's
the thing. It's getting it outright that's better than keeping it is.
And I think I've told myself thatto be a good friend, girlfriend,
daughter, that I keep it tomyself. My favor said to me,
She's like, there's certain things thatyou do that you think you have to

(40:13):
do to preserve relationships, when reallythey're doing the opposite. They're harming because
it's like, if you don't letit out, it's going to impact you
in other ways. She's like,you're never going to be able to outrun
certain stuff. It's like it's goingto come to like a com manifest and
headaches in your body like in yourdreams. It cant like it's just there
are some mannerisms. Well, first, I will want I want to say

(40:36):
everybody should be given the chance toreintroduce themselves all the time. So when
you are growing, this is areintroduction of who Sylvia is. We should
be able to love that and bemore than happy with it. Because Sylvia
is happier because this is who she'sbecoming. And it's not like you're changing

(41:00):
who you are because who you areis in stone. Okay, I know
Sylvia can do whatever she want rightnow. I know who Sylvia is because
her heart don't change. There aremannerisms also that I'm realizing when it comes
to like releasing anger, that arealso smaller that you could be doing.

(41:22):
Like I don't realize how much Iwalk around with my fistball ooh mm hmmm,
And sometimes I walk around with myfistball all the time. I don't
know what that's about me, yo, Just like all of just walking around
fitstbald or if I'm standing like fitsball, this is always bald. Also

(41:45):
my jaw, jaw clench my jawall the time. My dentist is like,
if you don't stop all the timewith surgery, there are things that
you can release. Also that's justnot screaming, but that also can be
seen as revolutionary for your body andfor the anger that deserves to be expressed.

(42:08):
And anger is totally fine. Ijust you know, I don't fuck
with the anger that hurts other people, right, and also an anger that
hurts yourself. But this is hurtingyourself. You suppressing it and not being
able to express it is going toshow up somewhere else. It's just going
to find a place. Yeah,it's because it's not always about her.

(42:30):
It's not even the kind. It'sabout hurting other people. It's about like
not expressing when I'm hurt, yeahyou know, or like when I feel
hurt people just like keeping and thathurts you, And I just don't want
it to hurt you or on otherpeople. I want you to be able
to express that and actually relieve yourselffrom it. Put it out there it

(42:51):
exists, and actually put a nameto it. Maybe if you're able to
relieve. Sometimes we don't even knowwhere to put the anger with. The
anger's about why I'm so angry becausewe haven't right to think about it.
We ain't got no time to seewhat it looked like. We don't know
shit about the anger and just livingthere like this, bitch, I'm mad.
What are we mad about? Idon't know, but I'm mad.

(43:14):
So you're like, okay, yeah, that's crazy because I think I admire
you for the opposite, for youbeing able to control your emotions. I
think there have been times where I'vewanted to control it and keep it down

(43:38):
and just be like whatever. Man. You know yo, I hope those
of y'all who can't see on YouTube, yeah, to be that cool.
But also I just feel like they'reI feel like you don't well, you
take things personally, but you havea way also to make it to them

(44:00):
problem, Like it is mostly ofthem problem. Yeah your point. I
think the happy media probably exists somewherebetween us. Yeah, you know,
definitely, what or who has beenyour biggest teacher this year? Would you
say? Now? Okay? SoI think the biggest teacher for me has

(44:22):
been I definitely underestimated the love thatmy friends and my family have for me
this year, as are we play, because I will say like, I
think the breakup was the big onewhere for me, I opened my eyes

(44:42):
a lot wider and was able tosee a whole lot that once you step
out of stuff, you're able tosee how big things are and what was
happening, and how you were drowningand what you were drowning from. You
were when you're out of the water, you know, Yeah, hindsighted twenty
Yeah, twenty twenty. So youknow, when I think about that,

(45:05):
and I think about when I've gotto get really visual. But it's like
I'm packing my things and I'm onthe phone, I'm Sylvia and Raven and
I'm crying and I'm packing. I'mpacking, and my little brother is downstairs
to come and get me, andI'm that boy dropped whatever he was doing

(45:34):
to come and get me. SoI think sometimes I lose sight of how
much love is around me. Ithink this relationship had made me feel like
I'm the most alone I've ever felt, so I thought that I would have
to do it alone. When Igot out and the way that my friends
had all stood up made jobs forthemselves. Everybody had a job assignment.

(46:04):
Can you Patty to TikTok to gay? All right? Everybody understand their role.
It really put in a perspective howmuch time and energy I need to
spend on those people. I thinkthat's my biggest lesson was to really spend
more time loving on those you knowfor sure love you like love on them.

(46:29):
I've never felt so in love withmy friends and family than this second
half of the year. Yeah,well, you know, selfishly, I
love to hear that, but y'all, but we're in love with you.
It's just love fest, you know, and I love that. That's also

(46:50):
something I think that we've learned thisyear is that, like I mean,
I think that's something we've been prettygood at. I think you and I
together and said really, But alsolike I think these last like two years
have been like a really big speakabout how your friends can be the loves
of your lives too. As forthis to be like a very single ass

(47:12):
year for me, I feel likeI was filled with so much love,
surrounded by so much love in away that I couldn't have imagined. I
think that speaks to one of theanswers not being the answer you thought it
was gonna be, but an answerthat's like even better because I did mean
to be loved and asked for morelove, and I think I was like,

(47:34):
girl, it's around, it's aroundyou. You can't see it,
So now I have to remove thingsso that you can right remove. And
it was it was more more thingstoo, but it just was I gotta,
I gotta get some stuff out yourway, and you're gonna hate it
and it's gonna hurt. So yeah, but what's yours? What was your

(47:57):
lesson? I mean, you nameda lot of things, but I think
like friends, friends were big teachersfor me this year. I think even
in the way I don't even thinkI've even told you, like like even
in the way in which you allowedus to take care of you, like
it's like it was such a teacherfor me because I don't know, I

(48:17):
don't know if i've we're so isthis speaks I'm laughing at the contradiction between
us. I don't even know ifI've mentioned that I went through a breakup
last year, but like I wentthrough a breakup last year, and I
isolated. Yes, Like I isolatedlike after that for a while and it

(48:38):
took me. And I think itspeaks to the thing about me hiding when
I'm being unagreeable, when I whenI'm having bad feelings, and it's like
I don't want to like put likeI don't want anybody else to see me
like this, so I'm just gonnastay in my apartment, like listening to

(49:00):
Runaissance and crying like like or whateverelse. And I think that in a
lot of ways, like the stillnessof last year, in combination with that,
it was like it went from beinglike it was welcome because it helped
like enable me to isolate, butit also hindered in a way where it
was like I saw how healing itwas to be in such movement this year

(49:24):
as opposed to like the stagnant stillnessI felt last year. Like even more
than questioning and answers, I feellike last year felt like a winter year
and like this year felt like spring. Yeah, in a lot of ways.
And I think watching because I hadgone through it the summer before,
watching the like the way my friendswere okay to fall apart in front of

(49:47):
me, and how I obviously likehow I felt as a friend, Like
so wanting to be there to likescoop them up made me. I learned
from that. Like I was likewhy, like why I feel like I
couldn't do this last year? LikeI why did I feel like I had
to isolate in my pain? AndI think like through this like tribal healing

(50:07):
that we were all doing this year, it healed parts of me that I
didn't know still needed. Yeah,that, and so I think that like
you guys taught me like yeah,it was like it was you guys taught
me to care like yeah, likeit was my way. But I think
what you guys showed me was itdoesn't have to be It doesn't have to
be that way. Yeah, onlyway, But I would want you to
do whatever makes you comfortable. Yeah. I think there were times where I'm

(50:31):
realizing that I could have used moreof a balance. But it was me
that kept myself from that balance.It wasn't like all my friends were there.
It was me, Like I didn'tlet my friends be there for me.
Yeah, I closed myself and Ihad to get past the shame of
heartbreak. Heartbreak, So like it'slike it's weird to feel ashamed about it,
because like that's what we're brought hereto do, is to love and
give chances. But you know,it's like us, like the trauma is

(50:54):
like the feeling like a ah,fool plagued me. I fell for it
again. Yeah, but I thinkthat's natural. I think that's gonna happen.
I think it's because I also feltlike I felt like a fool.
I told you. I was like, I'm fucking stupid. That's what I
am, a fucking idiot. Thedifference from the way we phrased it,
and I kept saying that fucking stupidand I'm like, you're not, you're

(51:15):
not, and it's like because youweren't, but you neither was. I
It's just that like it feels thatway because it's just a lot of pain.
But I think that I think havingsomebody there to remind you, Sylvia
that it's not not yeah stupid,to counter voices, to be the counter
voice. I think the voices aregonna either way, with the people around,

(51:36):
with the people not around, withthe people behind you besides you,
you're just gonna feel like an idiot. Okay, yeah, but makeup,
just clown makeup and all put thatred Ronald McDonald all out the lipstick.
We're back at it. We're backout. But but to have somebody to
remind you or a few people area tribe of people will love you and

(52:01):
we'll say listen, you're not fuckingstupid. And those are the things that
uh yeah, when when you getin your next relationship next year, we
will But but we are also speakingthere will be no breakup. There will
be breakings of love and break breakto be there. We are only doing

(52:28):
breakthroughs breaking I'm saying. That's allI'm speaking that that future and it will
come come through this year. Twowell, this year not even over.
You don't even know. You mightsee and December because we're going out to

(52:52):
the parties. So the way I'min the house, and how much I'm
okay with being a house, it'slike it's fun, especially during this time
of the year. I'm tired.I'll be back outside in the new year,
you know. But like, no, but to your point, no,
Like I think it's it's real,But I also think that I welcome.
I think now I've learned so muchabout myself through the adversity from last

(53:15):
year, and I think this yearI got to see start to see the
fruits of that labor and that innerwork and continue that work, and for
that I count it all joy like. So that's what that is for me.
And that's why y'all. But theway I think, yes, that's
why you guys were my biggest teacherthis year and even this podcast, you

(53:37):
know what I mean, Like havingto like evaluate ourselves every week week is
like, yeah, it's a lot, but I think yeah, and I
think to speaking of the teachers,like and you kind of touch on this
and I want to say, like, I what I'm most proud about you
four, Oh please, I can'tthis year. I can't do this is
please don't cut yourself with that pieceof plastic. It's not a tissue.

(54:04):
This this year. I watched thisyear try to take you out. I
did. I watched it try totake you out. And there was a
moment on my cause where I thoughtthat, oh shit, is succeeding.
Like I saw immediately a world wherelike all your worst fears, all the
lies you tell yourself, all thethings were like gonna become true to you.

(54:30):
And I was like, no,please, please, We've done Like
she's grown so much she's opened,she softened, like, do not let
this turn her heart like card again? And you didn't. You didn't let
it. And okay, you didnot let it. You not only stayed

(54:59):
open to joy, you allowed yourselfto keep your heart open. You allowed
yourself to keep loving and to givelove more chances in all sorts of ways.
And I truly like in such likeimpress the spectacular fashion that even me,

(55:19):
who has really high standards for peoplein my life, was like,
Dawn, like I'm impressed. Iam impressed. Like what it bounce back
like, it's just, it's just, but like I really thought that it
was gonna be the kind like lifetried to give you a big swing to

(55:40):
keep you down for a minute,and you did not let it keep you
down for long. And I amso so proud of you because the mental
gymnastics I know it takes to getfrom the things you were telling yourself to
the things you're telling yourself. Now. That brain, that mind of yours,

(56:00):
it's brilliant, it's beautiful. Butoh, that's a mean. Oh
to my friend, there's a meanin there. That just me saying it's
crazy ship in there, and I'mlike, stop talking. To my friend

(56:20):
like that she's gonna start to believeyou and you did not, And I'm
so proud of you, Scottie,Like I'm so so proud of you because
it because I now I know you'regonna like I just know you're gonna be
okay when it comes to love,because like you're like I've, like I've
it's like watching the healing be testedand like coming through like no, yeah,

(56:46):
the work has been done, likeit's being done. But like I'm
so proud. I appreciate it couldhave gone another way. It could have
gone so the villain era could havebeen crazy. It's been so could have
been so bad. But I justthe priority of love and that just speaks

(57:08):
to you and my friends, theway that y'all would not let me see
those cracks that I've been wanted,you know, like if I say a
crack, I want to open it. What is it? What's that?
I told you? What y'all willlaying our bodies of grind like nothing,
nothing, it's nothing, fine,it's fine. I think my friends have

(57:31):
become an embodied love and I havenot been able to see anything past it,
and so it makes me give itto myself give it to y'all,
but also like let it form indifferent ways in which I'm able to do
this forever. I am able togive love forever. And that don't mean

(57:53):
no. I won't curse a bit, y'all. Please don't ever get a
confused. I just want everybody toknow. I just want to in a
brief disclaim, I just want youoll to know that does not mean no.
But it means that my friends arereally sent from God. And when

(58:15):
I speak Sylvia, you are sentfrom God. There are words, the
words that you use in the languagethat God has bestowed, like been able
to give you changes lives, Itreally heals souls. I have been healed

(58:35):
because of the words you choose touse for me. Because also Sylvia has
his way of getting through to peopleusing different languages. And I'm not saying
like different types of like I'm notsaying Spanish, Greek and other things,
like I'm saying, she knows howto talk to everyone. She knows how
to get through to everyone, especiallywhen you're talking about the matters of the

(58:59):
heart. Sylvia is heart, that'sall. She knows. She knows everything.
So when I say she knows everything, when it comes to the heart.
I'm calling Sylvia immediately because Sylvia isthat to me and she is my
greatest reminder, Like she's one ofmy greatest reminders of love. I think

(59:20):
my mom is my number one.But you you know you're seriously going to
get the love you deserve. Sylvia. It's coming. It has to.
Literally when you see heart in thebook, in the dictionary, and Sylvia

(59:43):
like this right now. But Ijust will say, like, don't so
you have a way of getting downyourself and thinking like this is it's a
meat ass bitch hole there who thinksthis is all and this is it and

(01:00:09):
this is not it and this isnot all and it is coming. You
just gotta stay patient, okay.And should it might not be in La
it might be in Jersey. That'swhy you have to come back so there
or London. It's given London inthere. So that is what the twenty

(01:00:36):
twenty four we have got to getback there. Shout out to the top
boys, indeed, boys that wantthe black girls to that sh they are
there. But yes, I lovey'all, I love that. But yeah,
no, Sylvia, seriously, it'scoming and I can't wait. I
love you now that we've cried abouttwenty twenty three, it gotten those personal

(01:01:07):
revelations out. We wanted to playsome games. Let's pepping up before we
head on out. Yes, let'sdo it. I'm excited. Oh I
got a game of Sylvia, y'all. This is going to be a piece
of cake Sylvia. I told y'allI wanted to play a game with Sylvia.
Okay. She was going on andon about how fine Dayla Hurts is,

(01:01:29):
and she child, you know howmany times you told me who the
Eagle's playing? I can't come.I'm watching the Eagle. The Eagle,
I said, Oh girl, youwatch your football now. Hope Chrissy's listening
as well, is listening as well. Okay, because what is it you're
gonna quizz be on sports? I'mgoing to quiz you on the NFL,

(01:01:57):
just specifically the low ghos, easypeasy logos. Okay, I'm gonna show
you the logo and you have totell me what team it is. Okay,
Okay, okay, yeah, it'sgiven because you know I've been giving
Beyonce sports. I told you theeasy Okay, let's see, let's start

(01:02:23):
off an easy one. Okay,it is red and it's a bird.
Those the Atlanta Falcons. Is thatwhat your that's what the let's start you
a falcon? That's not a falcon. This is the Atlanta Falcons. Baby?

(01:02:46):
Oh and why is it not abird? Okay, okay, okay,
it's a different kind of bird.Okay, what is it? I'm
screamed? Think over where you are, Arizona? Are they Okay? Who

(01:03:07):
shiit? Girl? Baby? Arizona? All right? If I'm watching it,
that's a whole on that division.They're not in the NFC. Are
NFC? Okay? Got it?They're all right? This is okay.

(01:03:28):
I think you know this one.This one is easy. Tennessee tighten,
jes yo. I never watched aTennessee Titans game in my life. I'm
not gonna hold you, but itcame to me somehow, some way.
Okay, let's do this one.This is a flag, guys, with
a skeleton on it, and ithas a football in the middle of two

(01:03:53):
swords. Sylvia, I'm gonna bemad. I'm gonna be mad because you
know, the Simples is crazy becauselike Tom Brady played for, that is
the Patriots flag. No, notthe Florida one. The Florida one.

(01:04:13):
What was motherfucker's called before he retired. Yeah, and the Florida team because
of course Florida would have a skulland two knives between the two because the
flag. Because we're not free there. That's what the te hold on,
hold on, okay, No,I'm not gonna get it. Tampa Bay

(01:04:40):
Buccaneers. Ah, yeah, okay, I'm gonna get that one. I
was not even in the house.Is a tricky one. That is that
the Denver Broncos. I'm kiddy,I'm kidding. Bear, the Bears,
Cincinnati close, let me see theclose, Cincinnati who Ohio? Oh?

(01:05:10):
Also in Cincinnati, Cincinnati Bee Raccoona. This guy stripes on it. But
Tigers are not almost Ben goals,Cincinnati Bengels, the Bagels lang. Okay,

(01:05:43):
that was the because this is righthere, just something in the Tri
State. This is the East.Please from here. The Rams, good
job they love and then it's yourlast one. Okay, Oh, I

(01:06:10):
know it. Some cowboys. No, No, that that's a star.
That's the star. Peyton Manning,I know the Mannings. I'm I'm gonna
be mad at myself about this.I know I am, I know I
am because that's uh, do youwant to describe it for the people.

(01:06:33):
It is a horseshoe, the dumbestname. But here we are. I
think the commanders watched their commanders.It's better than the name it was before.
But still this right here. Theyhaven't been hot, and but we

(01:06:59):
the is the Colts. Yeah.I was never gonna get that, so
sorry to the Colts. You know, I know what Saints. You know.
I know that you knew the Saints. I knew all where to not
go, Baypacker. I don't knowwhere to not go because San Francisco,
forty Kansas City, Uh no,no, no, no, no,

(01:07:30):
no Chiefs Cheese, Kansaity Chiefe.Good job. They won the Super Bowl
last year. Detroit the Detroit youknow that was the Pistons, the wrong
league, wrong league? Please Detroit. Detroit has a football team. Huh
yeah? Do they ever make itanything? They're pretty all right. It's

(01:07:54):
like it's an animal. Lions.Good job, Lions, Detroit. I
told you Sylvia got most of themright, all right? Well you got
me good. But I know whaty'all are thinking. Y'all are thinking,
Wow, Sylvia, not knowing sportsis fun, But you know what's Funner

(01:08:16):
Scottie and her lack of knowledge aboutwhite people, and there was no way
we could go through with the tirescenes of this bringing back y'all's favorite game
that we used to play on ourold podcast. I don't know if we
ever named it besides just saying likethe white People game, because white people.
But I decided to freshen it upby making a specific two twenty twenty

(01:08:41):
three. So I'm going to readto you. I'm gonna ask you questions
based on things that happened this yearthat were big in the headlines. The
way I tried to make this fairwas by not only thinking of things that
I knew off the top of myhead. I didn't was like, go
good, so let's see how youdo you ready? Yeah? One of

(01:09:02):
the Friends cast members died this year. Oh my god. Who was it
and what character did he play?Matt Harry yep, Matthew Perry name that
is his real name and bonus pointsif you know which bonus points character was

(01:09:23):
played? A very sarcastic man.Yes he was dry humor name. It
was Matt No, that was hisname in real life. Chandler. Wow,
wow, guys, that really guys, that what that came through,

(01:09:46):
like the advertising advertised like it justI just started thinking about Ross and I
was Rachel and you still let mework my way my way through it because
there are a few in there Ido not know. But okay, yes
at one point, all right,see told John, I don't brush the
funk up? Yeah, what isthe what's the name of Taylor Swift's tour

(01:10:15):
this year? This? You knowthis, my heart dreamers, the dreamers
dream this, the dreamers dreaming SwiftiesSwifts is what they call her fans.

(01:10:45):
But no, there wasn't the dreamers. I love this because the reason why
I put this here was because youcan't tell most America that we all don't
know everything and death and we don'thave no idea, no clue, absolutely
not impact us at all. Isaid, I didn't know that lady was
in town. All right, I'mgonna give it to you. Yeah,

(01:11:08):
the Era's eras tour. Nope,not a not a chance. Don't even
know it exists. The only reasonI even do on top of my head
was because of that damn People ofthe Year article. Uh, because I
just had to I have to seewhat they could possibly have to say.
To justify that come. You know, they be coming in droves and racist.

(01:11:34):
I am like John Snow, Okay, I will fight them before I
fight the barbs. The barbs canfight the barbs. The Swifties can just
complain loudly. The Kardashian Jenners havefinally entered their white man era, hopefully

(01:11:54):
last forever. I know who isKylie Jenner dating? Oh? Childhood?
Travis Barker did lead the charge Courtney, that is her husband, But that
one's too easy. Who is that'snot this year? This year Kylie Jenner?
They were they were at the RenaissanceStore together. I did not know

(01:12:17):
that Kylie was dating, so shewas still with Travis. But here we
are herself from then then she said, I too, am going white an
actor okay, the man from theBear. No, Josh Allen, whoever
you say? That is not hisname, No, that's not his name.

(01:12:40):
The I didn't even know Kylie.Why don't she focus on herself?
There's no, he's an actor,her age actually around her age, like
he's a person. People know him. Yeah. I've tried to think if

(01:13:01):
you would have seen any of thisman's movies, this young man say some
movies. He's in Wonker. Ibelieve I never seen that move on.
It just came out. He's playingWalker, He's playing care call Me by

(01:13:28):
Your Name. It was a popularone song. Its streaming on Netflix currently.
His first big breakthrough. He wasin The New Little Woman. But
I know you did not watch that, Oh I know, Okay, he
was. He played Steve Carrell's sonin the movie A very sad movie,
that beautiful boy movie Little Yes.I cried my eyeballs out. That was

(01:13:54):
like, here's one that you know. That child's name name Timothy Chalotte Shallow,
Timothy Chalomet Malam Chala May, TimothyChala. People make jokes about him.
His sister blew my mind. Isthe annoying white girl from Secret Life
of Sex College Girls, The annoyingone, the lame one, the one

(01:14:15):
who's the lame, the light one, the white one who tries to the
black boyfriend from the blacks. Hissister. I can't un see it.
Look at you. I have tolook at them side to side, and
it's like, oh my god,I did not know that. Yes,
but I do know that now makesa lot of jokes about Timothy. There
you go, Okay, Yeah,Okay, So here's I mean, you've

(01:14:40):
I feel like I should even dothis one question because we've talked about it
so much already, because I didhave a question about the actor who used
to start in Shameless and now hasan Emmy Award winning show on Hulu that's
made him a lot of black women'snew confusing crush, including myself Shameless.
He used to start in Shameless andnow has a Golden Globe nominated show on

(01:15:01):
Hulu that we talked about in thisepisode. So you just tried to say
his name, but you got wrong. You've never seen Shame. You actually
Shamus probably pitched you off. Imean, Shameless is like this man from
Bear. Yeah I've never seen Bearthough, but his is like Peaky Blinders
if it was set in Chicago inthe modern era, poor white people,

(01:15:27):
ghetto ghetto, good white people tricklingfollow Mama Gah simbil and taking care of
theselves like it's but it's they're white, and so it makes it a little
confusing. Yeah, so we're justgoing to get that one. But it's
Jeremy Allen. Jeremy I said JoshAllen White was cute little so okay,
which actress lended her voice to BritneySpears' audio book. She was the actress

(01:15:54):
who read the book. And everybodywas like, oh my god, this
person william You know why because Ithought they were talking about Michelle Williams child.
I would open work through it thatway because shout out to Abba Elementary.
Every black person said, Michelle Williamsis reading. I literally saw that.

(01:16:14):
I said, why would she bereading this book? A good check?
That's a good check for Michelle,But why would she be voicing?
I literally was confusing, and Iwas like, oh, that Michelle william
Yeah, I don't know who thatis though. Dawson's Creek, never seen,
Dawson's Creek, broke Back Mountain,never seen Broke Back Mountain. Heath

(01:16:35):
Ledge his baby mama, shut up, Yes she has their daughter bless Yeah,
she played Maryland anyway. Okay,so okay, last one? All
right? This beloved Apple TV showseries came to an end this year after

(01:16:56):
three seasons, came to an end. Came to an end. The ends
over series for that. It's awhite show. I don't know if you've
watched it. I know you've heardof it. I'm sure you've had to
consider if you were watching it,or can I buy a fowl or something?
It's not based in America, onemight say it's based across the pond

(01:17:26):
you're talking about. It's crazy,is it? Can I can I just
ask for one white person? That'sfor a white person? Can I just
buy a white Okay? Oh,because you won't get any of the British
ones. So I feel like Ihave to tell you star's name. No,

(01:17:46):
not Emily Blunt, Jason Seducascas,I don't know. Uh damd Beckham
is a hint, but he's notin it at all. But because it's
fictional. M hmm, all right, well where is it? Ted lassoed

(01:18:12):
Lasso? Yes, I love it. I do want How the hell I
don't know? It's her biggest one. Also, I'm not even thinking about
Ted Lasso ending because yeah I was, I didn't. I was hurt.
It was Yeah. Who's Jacob JasonSadkas? Ted? Last? What do

(01:18:41):
I think his name was? Andy? He reminds me from the office.
I think that's what does it?He do? That? And his white
doppla ganger? Okay plays that man? It looks like him? Oh,
Ted Lasso. I feel like Ishould I deserve one more question? Because

(01:19:08):
well, looky for you, Ijust happen to have one I deserve.
Do I have? Oh? Ido? I don't know what's going on.
Looked at it and that's that allright. I finally gonna say the
first three words and you're getting absolutelyoh fuck. Which Jonas brothers troubled marriage

(01:19:31):
was in the news this year andbonus points if you know who his wife
is, the girl she's annoying her? Okay, Priyanka, No, because
it applies, all of it applies, but it's not. It's not.

(01:19:57):
Their marriage was out of trouble.Nick Jonas, that's Brianca's husband. Yes,
Now, Wi's Jones brother. Ithought I really had it. They
five as far as we know.So there's other Jonases. There's three of
them. There's three brothers, andactually there's one in my head. They

(01:20:21):
got dark eyebrows, his bushy eyebrows. That's all of them, I think.
But Nick Nicka is the youngest one. This is arguably once was the
most popular, the most popular one. John Jonas Jonas jingle Hives Smith.

(01:20:46):
I just can't think of anybody NickJohn is back. It's like your naved,
handsome brothers or what were those otherbrothers, the white brothers who used
to be on the Lawrence Brothers.I do you know why, I'm like
so impressed because you named a Jonah'sbrother and his wife. Anne correctly said

(01:21:09):
that she was annoying to most people. But there's another annoying wafe. Well,
she plays an annoying character in theshow that you loved, and so
I thought you were gonna say sheplayed that like she was annoying on the
show. Perhaps, I mean shehad an annoying season. She came into
her own, but it's the HBOshow. Nope, you lost me,

(01:21:32):
Sylvia. I don't know. Shewas in Game of Thrones? Who is
the brother Joe Jonahs not John?I was thinking Joe, though I think
we can all agree. I reallymeant Joe Joe Sansa from Game of Thrones

(01:21:58):
The Stork Sansas start. Oh wait, Oh, I don't know she.
I thought she was a child.Uh this is a baby, Sophie Turner.
Oh she's grown. I didn't know. Guys thought that they almost got
divorcedous year they're on their CARDI beingoffset. I think there was a child

(01:22:24):
custody situation. She was he wason tour. She wanted the kids in
London. It was a whole thinghappening this year. Taylor Swift took her
out to dinner. And Taylor Swiftis Joe Jonas's ex. That's how you
know he'd been in the street.The white community is going crazy over this
man Jonas. My sister would sithere and agree with you a thousand percent.

(01:22:44):
She's the biggest Jonahs Brothers fan,and she prefers Nick over Joe.
Her love for them in general confusesme, but I support it. I
know. She to this segment andscreaming Kevin, He's just you know,
the regular brother in Jersey doing realiststate construction or something, and he got
married first. Yeah who that completesto quiz White people Quiz. Anyway,

(01:23:13):
let's go ahead and transition to beforeWe Let You Go shot, because this
episode is packed. Before We letyou Go, we always want to close
out with a few words of affirmationsthat held us together over the past week.

(01:23:35):
What do you have for the peoplethis week? Sylvia? You know,
I feel like we dropped so manygems in our segment about this end
of the year, and like ourreflections about what we were going through.
And I think one of the thingsI wrote down that I did not get

(01:23:55):
to, but I think we kindof spoke towards it, and even in
which you were saying to me towardsthe end, it's something I heard not
so surprised surprised at church, butit was speaking about how the thing that
you're going through is pointing to whatyou're going to run it over with.

(01:24:17):
And I think that a lot oftimes, like the journey to the like,
the bigger the journey, the longerjourney, the bigger the reward.
And I think hopefully for people whoare in that winter season, who are
in that journey season, who arein that valley season, in the Questions
years, whatever, who are prebay, they don't get the God's Strongest Soldier

(01:24:40):
Trials and Tribulations package in twenty twentyfour back to back between twenty twenty three,
like to all of you, becausewe are you, like we feel
you, we see you, Iunderstand. I want you to try to
remember that there's evidence in your struggle, there's clue and things that you're supposed

(01:25:01):
to learn and know this and growfrom that will prepare you for the for
the what your cup is going withthe blessing that your cup is gonna run
it over with and hopefully that that'ssomething that helps me when I feel like
I'm in the eye of the stormand I know at the end of the
year you can get either. Imean, most of the time, I

(01:25:23):
think most of us are just hardon ourselves and are like this is hard,
Like I could have done more thisyear. I should have done this,
I should have done that. Thiswas not fair, like, so
give yourselves grace and also just remember, like I said during the talk,
that like every valley, for thereto be a valley, it has to
be between two mountains. Right,look back at the past thing in your
life that was good and know thatthere's going to be something in the future.

(01:25:45):
That's just how life goes, right. I love that though, Yes,
how about you friends. I waslistening to Sisa blind m and she
said, it's so embarrassing. Thisis not an affirmation, guys, I'm
just getting there. It's so embarrassing. All the things I need living inside

(01:26:09):
of me, I can't see it. It's so embarrassing. All of the
love I seek living inside of me, I can't see. I'm blind.
Baby. Let me tell you somethat spoke to me months ago. But
I would just hope that you justtake a moment to step out of whatever

(01:26:34):
it is that you are going throughand look. Before you think that you're
blind, or that you're so embarrassed, or that you know you're just an
embarrassing person that you can't see anyof the love, move back, take
a step back and look at itfor a minute, look around you for

(01:26:59):
a second. You are not blind. You can definitely see and also you
can definitely feel love once you allowyourself a moment to step back and feel
what's around you. I hope thisyear, whatever's left of this year and

(01:27:19):
also next year, you're able tofeel more and also taking I know we're
spending a lot of time reflecting,and you know what we're gonna do next
year, and this is what we'regonna do next year. Much to what
Sylvia saying, I really hope thatyou take a moment to celebrate the things

(01:27:42):
that you've learned about yourself this year. And although you have been reflecting on
the things that you've been through,I hope that you also celebrate coming out
of it or going through it andalso arriving there with all your things,

(01:28:02):
so you know it's inside of you. The love is inside of you,
The love is around you, it'sthere. I just really hope that you
take time this year to realize thatthe love is present around you, inside
you, everywhere around you. Stopletting one thing determine and dictate what's all

(01:28:26):
of you and it's not. It'snot all of you. That thing didn't
make you you what you put yourselfaround, which is love. And I
hope that you're able to find that. But even if you can't find that,
find that within yourself, I hope. And that's it. So that

(01:28:47):
and yeah, just celebrate what you'velearned. What have you learned about yourself?
Good things? Please. I knowthat we can say what we've learned
about ourselves negatively. It's so easyto say that, and it's so easy
to be able to jot those thingsdown. But take a second and think

(01:29:08):
about the things that you're able tohold close to you, that you do
admire about yourself this year, becausemaybe we made it. We made it,
honey, we made it. Yeah, holding on But yeah, things
are long, but the years areshort, man, years are short,

(01:29:28):
and they are flying by, honey. So but yeah, so in the
meantime, while you take a secondto reflect and do all that stuff,
make sure you're keeping up with theshow online using the hashtag Scottie and Sylvia
Show, and make sure you comeback for more of the Scotty and Sylvia
Show because we do it all butyou. Episodes of The Scotty and Sylvia

(01:30:00):
Show drop every Thursday, so checkus out wherever you listen to podcasts.
The visuals drop every Friday on YouTube. The Scotty and Sylvia Show is a
radio production hosted by Me Scotti Beanand Me Sylvia Obel. Executive producers are
also us Scotti Bean and Sylvia Obel, I know that's right, and executive
producers from Radio are Jafa Yador,Benoni Tago, and Everyone's favorite girl,

(01:30:27):
Isa Ray. Associate producer from radiois May say Hi, our senior producer
is Gabrielle Horton, sound engineer isIan Tacne, and our video editor is
Jay Kenrich. And a big thankyou to all the brilliant minds across the
radio universe who make this dope asshow possible.