Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
People will waste time procrastinating, searching for
like the perfect thing that theythink is just going to give them
the results overnight. It just doesn't exist.
They're thinking they're going to go to the gym that day or
monitor their nutrition that dayand be another step closer to
that and they can't see it and then they just get demotivated
and just drop off. What I'll often say is that what
you think the longest path is often the shortest.
(00:22):
One, being able to look at like you're training in nutrition is
like this is just what I do. You can do anything at that
point. Yeah.
I'm Ryan Stevens. Doctor Taylor Waters, I'm Ben
Oliver. Welcome to the Superhuman show,
Yeah? What's up, guys?
Welcome to the superhuman show with your host Ben Oliver, the
(00:45):
doc Taylor Waters and Mr. Ryan Stevens.
He's back, he's back. He's back in action.
Come out of retirement. We twisted his arm, please.
So today we're talking about mastering, mastering patients,
one of one of the key, key skills necessary for really
(01:07):
just, I mean, I want to say anything.
Yeah. Life advice?
Yeah, with three numbskulls. Yeah, I, I, I, I think it's,
it's such a, the ability to continuously do a task, habit or
behaviour, you know, for the endresult and not deviating from
that. Like that's what patience is
(01:28):
like. I, I think the, the biggest, I
think like, I guess mistake is that people think that if
you're, you, you can be impatient but still do the
things. And so then you could say, well,
is that being patient? And so like when people say I'm
(01:48):
really impatient, what that means is I will change my
behaviour based on this frustrated feeling that I get
from not getting the result thatI want and I want it faster.
But I, I think the, the mistake is like people that are acting
patient and continuing to do thething, they want the result just
as fast as you. It's not like they're like, Oh
(02:09):
no, I just, I just don't care. Like I'm happy to wait a year.
Like no, they want it this monthas well.
But they're, they've almost likerestrained themselves from
deviating from their habits and behaviours because they've got
that they used to like that delayed that, that ability to
kind of delay the gratification and, and, and stick to it.
So. It's like impulse control, isn't
(02:30):
it? It's like with anything as well,
like when you just said they like you should be patient with
anything. But like with fitness and
nutrition, it's like consistencyover time.
Internet, there is a time component.
It's like you're not going to get the results tomorrow if you
do everything today. And even worse with fitness, you
can do everything right? And the outcome that you're
looking for, whether that is like visually in the mirror or
the scale, you may look worse the next day or the scale go up.
(02:52):
And it's like the ability to still do the actions is what is
needed to truly get the results you want.
I like, I think the, the best comparison is like the S&P 500
where it's like your, your goal is to put deposits in that S&P
for 30 years and then eventuallyit's going to accumulate to
something significant. Then you can put it out and live
(03:12):
a happy ever after. But there's like a few things
like 1. If you keep just staring at it,
it doesn't go up any faster, butyou can frustrate yourself by
looking at it being like, Oh my God, this is the slowest thing
ever. 2 in that 30 years, it's going to have massive highs and
massive lows and it's going to net ideally go up, but in that
(03:33):
it's going to fluctuate. And if you react to every time
it goes up where you're like, I'll throw more in and then
every time it goes down, you're like, I'm going to pull it out
again. You sabotage that, that long
term game plan. And I see that's exactly what
people do with their fitness andnutrition, where they'll start
putting deposits in the scale will go up when it should be
going down. They're like, this doesn't work.
I'm going to try something else.And they, or, or they'll,
(03:56):
they'll follow their plan for three days and they're like, why
is it not working yet? Like, and they'll be looking at
themselves in the mirror, you know, maybe grabbing their fat,
kind of measuring their waist orwhatever, being like, why is it
leather measuring their waist? Because my, my arms are so as
big as my waist, but your waist is way bigger.
But like, they'll, they'll be like it, it's like watching
(04:16):
paint dry, you know, and they'rejust like, has it happened yet?
Has it happened yet? And again, like you'll, you'll
trick yourself into getting frustrated and then like almost
getting bored and wanting stimulation and doing something
else. So ultimately, like the
impatient leads, the impatience leads to changing your behavior.
I think that's where and you seea lot in fitness is the
(04:40):
impatience is magnified by the unrealistic expectation of how
fast things happen as well. And yeah, again, you can tie
social media to that as well. We were talking about that
earlier where, you know, you seea lot of these six weeks 8 like
things get marketed in a certainway, which then skews people's
perception of how realistic certain things are.
And then when they start to do them, the the outcome is not
(05:03):
living up to the expectation, which leads to them to the
frustration, which then leads tothe change of behaviour, which
now sets you further away. And you end up like the common
things you're going to see is like program hopping, crash
dieting, you know, change in dietary tact tactics, whether
they go carnival key or whateverit is.
And they're constantly shifting and moving.
(05:25):
And I remember there was a guy from the gym years ago and he's
in good neck like he was, he looked great.
But every time you speak to him,he's doing something else.
He's in, he's in a fat loss phase now.
He's now he's cutting that. Oh, sorry, in a fat loss phase
now he's bulking, then he's thinking about competing, then
he's not. Then he wants to get good at a
sport and then he's not. Then he's jumping on gear, then
he's not then. And it's just like, mate, like
(05:47):
you're, you're getting nowhere at the moment because you're
just constantly shift in this goal.
And it's like, yeah, it's because you, you want to do
something, you're not patient enough to wait, wait it out for
it to happen. So you change and then you're
not patient on that one either. And then you change.
So it's like, you need to reallyjust build that.
And this is where you know, you,you spoke about the S&P 500.
(06:08):
Yeah. Where it's like, if you can
build fitness into your lifestyle, so you've got the
goals that you want, if you can incorporate that into your
lifestyle, you don't know, you don't have to think or look at
it. You just live.
And then we like speak about that as a byproduct of living.
You then go, ah, I'm way fitter,way leaner, way stronger than I
used to be. And you weren't meticulously
(06:30):
checking things every single day.
You were just like, Oh well, I go to the gym 4, four days a
week with, with pretty good effort.
My diet is, you know, my dietarybehaviours are pretty dialed in.
And then over a 1015 year periodnow you're so much further ahead
and you haven't even paid that much attention to it.
It's like for you, you don't meticulously monitor anything.
(06:55):
Ever. Anything at all.
But what you have done is you did it for a period of time that
enabled you to change your behaviours.
You sort of mastered those like behaviours and now you just live
with them as and then as a by product.
Just now waking up and doing your thing, you progress like
the way you do. Yeah, I think like, you know,
like realistically, it's like ifyou had a year doing the same
thing, you're going to get incredible results.
But like if you look on like social media be like, oh, 90
(07:17):
days, I'll get this result or whatever.
And like if you look at that at face value, people are going to
go for like the 90 days originally because they're like,
oh, I can get the result in 90 days.
And what I'll often say is that what you think is like the
longest path is often the shortest one because someone
will do this for 90 days, realize that it's not going to
get the result. Then they'll go into another 90
day program. And if you look at the people
(07:38):
who's been trying to get the result doing these programs,
it's been like a couple of years.
Whereas if you just stuck to thesame thing for one year, you
would have been there and maintained right now.
Remember I was when I, when I was at college, this is when I
was 17, this was like I was likefully entrenched in training,
like bodybuilding training. And this was this, you know,
(07:59):
like maybe like broadband was just starting to be decent.
Like at that point, you know, wehad like MSN and stuff like,
because I remember like, you know, when you were like 13 or
whatever, it'd be that dial up, like you couldn't do anything.
Like the Internet was useless. But like like 17, it's like you
could find good stuff on the on the Internet.
And so it's like you had the forums, like the bodybuilding
(08:22):
forums and stuff like that. There wasn't any like YouTube
hadn't really like there were like no prominent fitness
Youtubers. Like then it was, it was, it was
all like forums and bodybuildingkind of stuff.
But I was looking. Bodybuilding and pornography.
Yeah, that's. Pretty much it I went on the
forums match and but the I, I was kind of like changing my
(08:42):
routines like all the time and like just reading different
books and like training ADD. And there was a guy that comes
to the gym and he first started,he was like quite skinny and he
was doing 5 sets 5 like Mark Ripto, like squat, bench,
deadlift. And I was looking at, I was
like, it's like that's you need to leg press, you need to do leg
(09:04):
extension, you need to do all these things.
And then I went to university like a couple years after, like
any he would still be in and outof the gym.
Like, you know, started his squat to like 40 kilos next
week, 42 1/2, then 45. And I come back probably when I
was like 19, maybe like between,yeah, between 19 and 20.
And I saw him in the gym and he looked like he gained about 40
(09:27):
lbs and he put on 4 plates on the bar and was squatting 5 sets
of five. And I was like, me, like what
you've been doing. He's like the same thing.
And he's like, I've just added 21/2 kilos, like whenever I can.
And I've just done the same routine.
And I was just like, you know, I, I like, built a decent level
of strength at that point, but Iwasn't five sets, 5 of 1/8, like
(09:50):
4 plates at that point. And, and I was like, fuck.
And I was thinking like, if I had just stuck with my routine,
yeah, like I could have done that.
And so, but it was such a good example of like he just blindly
followed a routine and put effort into it for like 3 years
and got stronger than what most people, most genpop will ever
be. And it didn't.
(10:11):
And it didn't take that long, like 3 years.
Like that's not like that's not crazy.
Meanwhile I was spinning my wheels for like a year and a
half of that trying to figure out what I thought was like the
the perfect plan. That's where as well, it's like
sometimes ignorance is bliss. Like if you don't have much
information, just go to the gym,just train really hard.
Whereas like the people who werelike reading loads of books,
etcetera, they're constantly jumping around all this.
(10:33):
This is apparently better than this.
Whereas like if you don't know any better and just go to the
gym five times a week, train really hard.
Like I know loads of people thatare not even in fitness
whatsoever and they just like going to the gym, train their
ass off, like eat loads of food and then they've made so much
more progress than people who'velike beat the university and got
like degrees and stuff. A lot.
(10:53):
Better, they've just done it for15 years.
Yeah. Like what works?
What's the biggest dictator is just like somewhat hard work
done consistently over time. Like you can break the nuances
up and you can see like this program is a bit better than
this one and this one might support this one better.
And then and then like the different diets and things, but
it's like the key driver is the one that's just putting in some
(11:17):
work for 5/10/15 years. So that should be the main
focus. That's the one I'm definitely
going to do. Whereas if you're like on a
program, then you're off a program, then you've got a
coach, then you haven't got a coach, then then then you're
going to change and do this goal.
It's like then you end up again just spinning you and 10 years
later again like you're in the same spot.
I I was watching one of Jay Cutler's videos from like when
(11:39):
he was in his in his prime. With the blonde kid because
they. Because they all come out with,
you know, they have their own training DVDs and then someone's
put them on YouTube. But like his, he's, he said, you
know, like genetics aside, you know, one of the top guys in the
world trained, trained very, very hard.
But it's like, what was your routine?
He's like, well, I know what body part I need to train on a
(12:00):
certain day. And I would go to the gym and
see what equipment was free. And then I would go on that
piece of equipment for a few sets.
Then I would go on to the next one.
And then when I feel like I had nothing left, I would leave.
And then I would go and eat. And so it's like, what sets and
reps do you do? And he's like a lot.
And it's like, yeah, like if I felt really good and felt
stronger, I might go a bit heavier.
If I, if my shoulder hurt a little bit, I'd go a bit
(12:21):
lighter. Like how many sets?
Like sometimes three, sometimes 8.
And it's like what you know, sometimes I feel like I can do a
lot and otherwise I'm, I'm a bittired.
It's like there was no, there's no periodization.
It was just like Monday's chest,Tuesday's legs.
But if I'm busy, then Wednesday's legs.
And it's like there was no, if you like looked at like a 12
month training period for him, there would be no pattern.
(12:42):
And like the, the only thing is like he's in there for an hour,
hour and a half getting after itand then eating, you know, and
that's, that's the one thing he was structured on was like his
diet. But like, training wise, it was
like, go, go and train hard and then recover and then do it
again. Yeah.
And like, that was literally it.I've seen a similar video that
(13:03):
Lee Priest did. I remember just cry and he was
on Instagram and he was like, oh, we didn't do macros back
then. We just ate this.
And he said something, I can't remember what it was, but he was
like, oh, this exercise where it's the long head of the tricep
and he was like, it's a fucking tricep mate, just train it like
that. I remember.
Just try. Like there's there's obviously
you know, they they like Lee Priest is probably the most
genetically blessed bodybuilder,but there is like you can
(13:28):
definitely take from that. So like should you if you train
like Lee, where you look like Lee Never like no, no one ever
will, but like he's in. His offseason, yeah.
He doesn't fly for three. So, hey, genetically gifted to
an extent, yeah. But then, but then there's also
like, if you find yourself getting caught up in the weeds
of like, I don't know whether todo 8 to 10 reps or 6 to 8 or 12
(13:50):
to 15 or two sets or three sets,or I need to, you know, put my
program on a spreadsheet and Addall, Add all these things.
And it's like there are millionsof people.
There are guys in Africa that are doing curls with, you know,
a rusty barbell and a tire, getting in great shape, living
off maze and, you know, and, andjust training hard every day.
(14:13):
So I know we've kind of deviate from our talk about patients,
but I think it's like going backto that people will waste time
procrastinating searching for like the perfect thing that they
think is just going to give themthe results overnight and it it
just doesn't exist. Like fitness is not one on
(14:33):
perfect days, it's not one on perfect weeks.
It's literally if you can just be good all the time
consistently, that's how it's won.
Like it it isn't 1. You see so many people like, Oh,
I like they, they come to maybe like before with super and
things and they're like, oh, I've, I've started this new
training program and it's awesome.
Like I am crushing it. And then literally a month later
(14:56):
they're like, I'm training for three weeks and you're like,
yeah, that's that same person that you're just spinning
because you're looking for that like that golden nugget to start
something and it feels amazing and it's just going to carry
you. And like, I've done what
everyone else is doing for 10 years.
I did it and it took me 3 weeks and it's done.
That's what they're looking for.And then they but then they keep
and then next, you know, 10 years later, they haven't done
anything again. They just keep spinning their
(15:17):
wheels time on time like. You said Ben, you'd rather have
someone who's 70 to 80% for the rest of their life than like
someone who's 100% for like 7 weeks or?
Whatever, I had a client who wasliterally like that where first
first like 16 weeks crushed, dropped like 30 lbs, fell off
the wagon, gained a bunch of weight and then never got back
on it. And then like tried a different
coach jump back in with me and then got him set up.
(15:40):
You know, same deal as last time.
Here's what we're going to focuson basics.
And then it was like, oh, like, what do you think of band
training? And I'm like pretty useless.
Like if you don't, if you don't have access to a gym and all you
have is bands better than nothing.
Like, and this is for body composition.
I'm not talking like for sports and explosiveness and stuff, but
like, it was like building a whole routine from using bands.
(16:01):
And I was like, well, like, the main issue is the strength curve
is a bit off. Like, you know, everything's the
hardest at the top. And then it gets really easy.
You know, it kind of catapults you down.
You don't get the eccentric blah, blah, blah.
And he's like, oh, well, I read this thing and, you know,
apparently, you know, you can build muscle three times fast
with bands. And I was like, well, that's not
true because no bodybuilder is training with bands alone.
(16:22):
If that was the case, then they would be.
And he's like, what can I get a band worker anyway?
Yeah, sure. Put together a band training
program for him two weeks later,like, hey, man, can you, can you
set me up with a barbell and a dumbbell program?
And I'm like, yeah, like what happened to the band training?
He's like, oh, yeah, I just likedidn't, didn't really do
anything. I'm like, OK, two weeks later,
Hey, like, so I've been looking at a lot of kettlebell training
(16:43):
and I'm like, well, you know, dumbbells and Barbos were
invented after the kettlebell because like they're superior
and there's more variety and stuff.
And he's like, yeah, I just wantto try like cattlebell training
and then two weeks nothing. And then all of this while like
I had AI had a call with him andI'm like, Steve, like all the
time you've done this, you've drank beer every night.
Like you've even when I've changed a routine, you've only
(17:03):
done half of it, like probably half assed like, and you've
gained 20 lbs. Like you need to just accept the
fact that like you are just not doing it.
You're, you're trying to chase this like magic pill that
doesn't exist. And, and so it was, it was
really frustrating for me to because again, it's like I'm
trying to accommodate the clientwith what they want and stuff.
(17:23):
And I'm not going to be like, Nope, we're not doing that.
But at the same time, it's like,here's a bit of tough love, bro.
Like you're going to spend the next year trying a body weight
program, you know, a, a, a prison program, calisthenic
calisthenic kings, you know, andthen band training, then then
powerlifting training, whatever it is.
Brett Contreras, Brett Contreraship thrust your way to, you
(17:46):
know, oblivion. And then it and then it's like
you're the half. Mast to 5000.
Yeah, and and then you're going to be in the exact same spot.
And it's like and I and I would hate to see that.
And so you, you try and save people the time.
And again, it's like it's, it's so contradictory.
It's like I'm trying to save people time by telling them to
(18:07):
be patient and give the thing time.
But otherwise they end up spending five years doing what
they could have achieved in six months.
Yeah. I tell you what, calisthenics
will be a little bit out of 20 lbs area, yeah.
Yeah, that, that. Was intention.
Every week gain 2 lbs. You know, then you pull.
Out it gets to a point though, you know when you've explored
all avenues, at some point you just have to look in the mirror
(18:28):
and be like, look dude, like what is the problem with
sticking with one thing for likean extended?
Yeah. And when you, when you've
changed the training program like 5 times and you're not
getting the results, like look dude, like we're doing the same
thing and like expecting a different outcome, it's like
what? What is the real problem?
You see a lot of times the people that have that issue of
training, like they do it in other areas of their life as
(18:48):
well. Like they're they're gym,
they're the guys that get like frustrated in traffic even
though they're in the traffic everyday.
And it's like it's the expectation.
It's like, and you're still getting annoyed by it.
Or like just any little thing that's like doesn't give them
that immediate return, they get frustrated and kind of throw
their toys at the prime and get like emotionally reactive over
it versus just like being able to think logically and remove
(19:12):
emotion from that decision making and saying like, well, I
know if I keep doing this thing,eventually it's going to yield
this result. Like and being able to just not
think about it and do something else productive with your time.
Like that's like some of the best guys, like, like you said,
like maybe they're not like ignorant, but they're just like
they have other priorities in life that they focus on.
(19:34):
And so it's like, I tick the boxes and then I don't give it
another thought. And then they're the ones like
in six months time, you're like,dude, like you're jacked.
And he's like, Oh, I didn't evensee like I just, I just been
doing what you told me. And then I crack on with my day
And it's like they don't overanalyze it or get kind of
paralysis by analysis. It's like I eat my protein.
I just, I do what my coach tellsme and it works like that's it.
And then you've got like the other guys that they a
(19:58):
constantly given push back to the coach.
And by no means is it bad to askquestions.
You know, if you're curious why you're doing something, the
coach should be able to explain it to you.
But if you're trying to combat it with like, oh, well, you
know, I read this thing or you know, I feel like I should be
doing this. And it's like, why did you come
to me? Like, if, if you if you feel
like that's going to work for you, why are we having this
(20:20):
conversation? And why have you not just done
that and got the results? Like it's it's clear that it
didn't work. So from a, from a fat loss
perspective, then like, let's say we're talking from a fat
loss perspective, the if you have got someone who is
impatient, what, what do you tryand get them to do to, to solve
that problem? I guess because it is, is really
(20:41):
common. And as you said, they do it in
other areas of like their life. Is there anything that you're
like, well, let's go this route to try and support them to be,
you know, to, to stay on course?I first thing, I just layout
very, very clear, realistic expectations because again, you
could look at it and say, well, I, I would do a more aggressive
(21:04):
approach to kind of get them theinitial wins, which can work.
But then also you can be feedinginto that impatience because
then it eventually is going to slow down and then they're going
to be like they'll be your best friend and then your worst enemy
as soon as it stops. You don't solve the problem.
The the problem is the expectation and what you're
doing is put a Band-Aid on it and just ramping.
Things up. So I, I may, I may be a little
(21:26):
bit more aggressive whilst I'm continually having conversations
with them about the building, the skill of being patient,
because it will get to a point that you'll, you'll have to have
that like stern talk of like thereason why you're impatient is
because your expectations aren'taligning with reality.
It's because your expectations are fabricated off these things
(21:47):
which are not realistic. Like whether it's social media
or well, I've got a friend and they did this.
It's like, cool, you don't live their life or have their
genetics. And so it's you, you end up
having to burst that bubble at at some point.
And I would rather do it right at the start then try and like
feed into it and then reinforce it and then have to do it
(22:10):
because then they'll be like, well, I'm just going to find
someone else that's going to lower my calories even more.
And they they can't kind of see the play the long game.
Yeah, yeah. They often from like previous
experiences, while we're like, they'll do like a crash diet,
you know, some like juice that and they'll drop like 10 lbs in
a week. And then when you, when you were
training them and they're like dropped like 2 lbs in the first
week, they're like, oh, well, last time I dropped 10 lbs in
(22:31):
the first week. So again, like all these
expectations that aren't alignedwith reality often come from
previous experiences too. It's like you're often saying
that like often something I'll say it's like, well, yeah, how
did that work out for you though?
Because like you dropped 10 lbs in a week, but now you're like
sat in front of me and like, obviously it worked short term,
but it didn't work long term. And obviously when you talk to
them in that sort of sense, like, yeah, it worked for a
short period of time, but we want to work for a long period
(22:53):
of time. So you slowly change their
expectations over time because again, frustration comes from
unmet expectations, OK, Yeah. So and if they have unrealistic
expectations. Yeah, yeah.
I think a massive part is the expectation, isn't it?
It's, it's, it's just falls right out of the gates.
And as long as it's not going tolive up to that expectation,
they're always going to feel like they're not getting what
they want and they're not doing well.
(23:13):
And they could do more. And again, like we see it, you
know, when you do a training program with someone and they're
like, oh, I can do more. I'm not, I'm not doubting you
can. Like, I'm sure you could do
more, but is that going to get you to the goal any faster?
No. So what's the point?
You're just wasting time and effort.
But I think for those people as well, it's quite nice because
again, it can be a long game. Like, you know, a longer game
is, is muscle building. Like, Christ, that's a, that's a
(23:36):
real long way to go. Yeah.
Yeah. But then so let's take from
muscle building and then maybe apply the fat loss.
So from muscle building standpoint, one of the things
that I like to encourage guys todo is monitor training
performance because then they can get the, they were not the
instant, but like the short termwins.
So that keeps them taking over. They're not like I can, I'm
(23:58):
expecting a bit more next week and then I can maybe get a bit
more next week. And then over six months, their,
their attention has been entertained by progressions in
the gym, which happened much more frequently.
And then they look and they're like, oh man, I'm up like I'm up
like 10 lbs. I'm feeling strong and I'm
looking jacked and say OK now. So you almost like their
attention was was changed somewhat changed angle.
(24:19):
And then so if you apply that tofat loss, some of the things
we'll look at is like habit tracking.
They can get instant wins daily.Like I'm taking off 4-5 habits a
day, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
And I'm winning, I'm getting wins, daily wins, and it's
taking their attention off the, the, the end goal of being
shredded or whatever. And then like 6 weeks later, you
(24:40):
show them a photo and they're like me, I don't even looked at
my photos like I'm looking way leaner.
So it's just giving them these other other pathways to satisfy
that like those wins. And then it keeps them moving
rather than when people are justfocused on that one outcome and
that's all they're training for.It's like they're thinking
they're going to go to the gym that day or monitor their
(25:00):
nutrition that day and be another step closer to that and
they can't see it. And then you just get
demotivated and just just drop off.
Yeah. And then I mean, I'll try and
because again, because muscle building is such a such a slow
process, I almost try and get them motivated just to do like
by doing the thing. So I'll use like objective
(25:23):
metrics, like performance in thegym, chasing those numbers
because the scale, it's not going to be a really valuable
metric short term, you know, after like 3-4, five months, of
course. But like looking at weekly
weight gain, it's like we don't really want to see a huge jump.
And so it's, you know, it's not that accurate, but I try and get
them to buy into enjoying the process for the sake of the
(25:46):
process rather than like being motivated to do it for an
outcome. It's like being motivated to do
the thing just to do the thing. So like, I don't have to, I
don't have to do those things like you mentioned to keep me
going to the gym because I'm just motivated to go to the gym
because I like it and it makes me feel good.
And so it's trying to get peopleto that point where it's just
(26:08):
what they do and who they are. So it's like we don't need to
dangle the carrot like with these other metrics.
And I think you do initially, but then after a certain point,
it's like patience isn't even a part of it because it's like,
I'm going to do it anyway. Like it's just, it's just part
of like my daily routine or my weekly routine or whatever it
is. And it's like, yeah, I'm
(26:28):
probably going to net some muscle.
You know, if I'm dieting, I'm going to drop somebody fat.
But either way, I'm still doing these, these habits and
behaviours. And so it's like I, I like, I
don't have to be patient becauseit's like, well, I'm doing it
forever anyway. So there's, there's no rush for
it. So it kind of gets rid of that
impatient I'll. Tell you one thing, you know,
like initially when clients aren't motivated to like do the
habits and behaviours that are going to get the outcome that
(26:50):
they want, like tying a reward to those habits and behaviors.
So like, I don't know if you go to the gym four or five days a
week, I know you like golf, go and buy yourself a new set of
golf or whatever it may be or something they were going to buy
anyway. Like they don't buy her until
they've hit like these milestones but not the outcome,
the habits and behaviors that lead to the outcome because it
positively reinforces those and eventually the outcome will come
(27:10):
as a byproduct of. That yeah, you know, that's
awesome. Yeah.
And obviously with time then as well, like you said, like it'll
just be something that you just do.
You won't even need to tie the reward to it.
Yeah. But initially that's a really
good way that I found of doing it.
Yeah, you mentioned the the enjoyment side of it.
If you can get someone to enjoy it, yeah, then the instant
gratification they're seeking isenjoyment.
(27:31):
Yeah. And then it's like, oh, well,
now it's well, if if you can getsomeone to that point, then it's
like, oh, they want to, they want to rocket ship now.
Now it's just this is an easy win because now they're going
because they're choosing to go because they like actually be in
there themselves. It's like if you couldn't get
that ingrained in someone you'veyou've almost like I've solved
this that way sound. And obviously, you know, like
that'll come with time, but obviously with time as well,
(27:54):
they'll actually start getting the outcome, which will then.
Fuel their enjoyment. So it's just getting them to
that point where they start seeing the results.
Oh God, like I love coming here.It's like my arms are more.
Jagged Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's also like an interesting
conversation to have with someone.
Like, like, why are you impatient?
Yeah, let's go. Oh, like, because I I like
things fast like everyone does. Like, So what?
Like what's the rush? Like, what is the like, let's
(28:15):
just say it takes you 50 weeks to lose 50 lbs.
Like, so still less than a year.You know, you've never lost 50
lbs before. You've only ever lost 15 and
then gained it back. Like, is that really so bad?
Like, why is it that you're in such a rush to lose this 50 lbs
in three months when we could doit in a year?
Like, like, legit like what? Like what's the difference?
(28:38):
And a lot of times they're like,yeah, you're right.
And you're like, yeah, like because it's you, you've been
gaining this weight for 10 yearsand we're getting off in a tenth
of the time, but that's still not fast enough for you.
Why? And again, it, it goes back to
unrealistic expectations, like, oh, because I've just randomly
thought of 12 weeks in my head because I always see 12 week
programs. And so I just assume that it's
(29:00):
going to take that long. It's like, no, like if all you
saw was 50 week programs, 50 weeks would be completely
reasonable for you. But it's like you've, you've,
you've built it up in your head just from years and years of
magazines and social media and whatever, saying 8 weeks to
shred it, 10 weeks to shred it, 12 weeks to shred it, that now
you're like, that should be the norm.
I should have this done in 12 weeks.
When if all you saw was like 3 years to get in the best shape
(29:23):
of your life, like 10 years to achieve this thing and that's
all you ever saw, If someone said, yeah, it's going to take,
you know, a year, it's like, I read that it was going to take
10. Amazing.
Like this has happened so fast. And so it's like you, it's all
just your perception of how longit will take.
If if anything with fitness, like when you look at the the
ratios, it is actually quite fast.
(29:44):
Like if it took you 20 years to get out of shape.
Yeah. And it's going to take you a
year and a half to fix it. Awesome return.
That's a great, that's a great return.
It's like, oh, I was able to slob out and do nothing for 20
years and I solved it in a year and a.
Half undo 20 years of shit habits and behaviours and and
everything in a year and a half.Like that's incredible.
(30:04):
But everyone's like, no 12 weeks, yeah.
A year that's that's, that's so long, that's, that's four times
the amount of 12 weeks, yeah. That's, that's like one of the
initial conversations I'll have because often clients will be
trying to like get to their goaland it'll be like 5-10, fifteen
years. And he's like, well, if I can
get you to that goal in like 2 years, that's a great return on
your investment. You know, so it's like, and that
(30:27):
often changes their expectationsand it changes their
perspective. Yeah, it's always good if you
can nail that right out the gates.
It's there and it's like, OK, well, then they they know that
they're there and they're willing to do that work then.
And it's, it's, it's a much smoother ride.
If you can set the true expectation right out the gate,
then I, I think that's a lot of the, you know, the decrease in
(30:49):
motivation that we see and the, you know, the, the drop off and
program will be due to the, the,the expectations being skewed.
With, with like muscle building,it's like when people say, oh,
you know, I'd love to pack on 10months of muscle in 12 weeks and
say, well, based on that logic, you're saying that people could
gain 40 lbs of muscle in a year.Can you show me anyone that's
(31:11):
done that like oh, and, and natural by the way, like because
you don't want to take any PEDs like cool, there is no one.
So that rate of gain that you'repulling out of your ass is just
complete nonsense. So it's like when you like, it's
like, OK, so based on the fact that you think you can gain 10
lbs of muscle in 12 weeks, I should be able to gain 100 lbs
(31:32):
of muscle in just like just over2 years.
Like I don't think I can like. And, and so, so it's like then
when you look at that like, yeah, that is a bit silly.
It's like you're looking at maybe 3 lbs like in 12 weeks, 1.
Like, you know you might you might get 3 to 3 to 7 lbs in a
year if it's a really good year.I haven't gained 1 LB in five
(31:54):
years. Yeah.
One of my one of my clients had a DEXA done and it was like, I
think it was like 12 weeks apart.
And they're like muscle masses only get the small amount.
It's actually been 12 weeks. Yeah.
Like Craig's like if you see anymuscle growth over 12, huge win.
Decent. Yeah.
It all comes down to like previous experiences or things
they've read because like I've had clients, but like they've
dropped 2 lbs in a week and they're like, oh, this is a
(32:15):
rubbish week. I'm like what, 2 lbs?
Yeah. What's that a big rig about?
Yeah, yeah. It's like again, it's just
different perspective. Yeah, the same outcome, the
expectations different. Yeah.
And yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I'm going in from my ass.
God, this is our biggest week. And he's like, oh, rubbish week,
yeah. Like.
Yeah. What made you think that?
Yeah. Then you say to them, like, So
what would make it a great week?And they're like, oh, like
(32:35):
losing 5 lbs. And it's like, OK, let's do the
math on that. Yeah.
Like, we would need to be in a deficit of like, and then you're
like 5 * 17,000 calories. So you would need to eat -200
calories a day and walk 10 milesevery day in order to achieve
that. Can you do it?
Like no. And you run a you run a multi
$1,000,000 camp with five kids. Yeah, good luck.
(32:56):
And you've told me you can't train for more than an hour a
day like. I've actually done that with
someone. They were like, oh, I want to, I
want to lose. I think it was like I got six
weeks to list point and I want to lose 20 lbs.
And I was OK. Well, just to show you what that
would look like from a number standpoint, this is how much
you're currently losing on X amount of calories and X amount
of steps. So if we kept steps the same,
(33:18):
because we know you're maxing those out at the moment, we're
going full in on those. You would have to.
And I worked out it was like, you'd have to eat 300 calories
every day for the next six weeks.
Are you willing to do that? And he's like, oh, God, no.
Oh, OK, so, so. So let's forget the 20 lbs in
the next six weeks. Yeah, about a Mind Like you.
What's that film with that guy? Just like his diet was like an
(33:39):
apple and cigarettes or something.
That was a Joker when it that was whack and Phoenix preparing
for the Joker. Yeah, yeah, this.
Was one of those diets cigs and apples?
Yeah, there you are. Let's get a pack of Mile
Marlboro Lights and a bag of Granny Smiths and I'll see you
in 6. Weeks, I think Matthew
McConaughey for like Dallas Buyers Club, he like stayed
indoors. So his skin went like pasty and
(34:01):
just frail because in Dallas Buyers Club it's basically he's
got, he's got AIDS and then he'slike, he just Withers away to
like just bone. But he would literally his diet
was like like a can of Diet Coke, some whitefish and like a
glass of red wine in the evening, Like, and he did that
for like months. And I'm just like, oh, like, I
(34:22):
mean, pay me that much and I'll and I'll yeah.
But. Jeez.
And then having to act yeah, while you go in and they're
like, Oh no, cut the lighting's a bit off.
You'd be like that. Think about like how annoying
you'd be like. Yeah, like bodybuilders like
their peak week, They're like agitated and they've got a guy
who. Limped off cigarettes.
Yeah, yeah. Cigs have to do it like a like
(34:42):
that was 10 hour day on. Set Christian Bale.
It's just another day. Just another day, isn't it?
Yeah. Tell me what shape I need to be.
I'll do it in two months. Someone's put your makeup on
you. The makeup, it's like, how'd you
feel? Yeah, get off me.
That price is going to be an assin.
A minute what he did after that film, I bet he went and had a
massive. Feast.
Oh yeah, yeah, loads of apples. Yeah, give me the old bag.
(35:04):
Yeah, and a pack of cigarettes and a big.
Fat cigar. Yeah.
But yeah, I think like learning to master the the and again, I
say the skill of patients is being able to consistently do
the same behaviors and habits that is going to get you towards
your goal. So being able to master that
(35:24):
skill, it doesn't mean you're going to suddenly be OK with
slower results. You may still always want
results faster. We all want to get stronger
faster. We all want to build muscle
faster. We want to lose fat faster.
But we can still have that one, but have our actions be
consistent to what we know is a realistic time length.
So it's just trying to delay that gratification and not act
(35:50):
out of emotion is is one of the most effective ways to get to
your goals, especially when it comes to like fitness and fat
loss and things. But really with anything but
being able to. I know Alex or Mozi spoke about
this with like the three traits that he saw in hyper successful
people. And because people like people
(36:10):
would look at it as like, oh, they get up at 6:00 AM or like
they do these things and he's like there were no trends that.
But he said the main three were superiority complex.
So they thought they were betterthan everyone else, which led
them to act like it, but then also super insecure.
So they would beat themselves upand think that they were
worthless. So low self worth, but a
(36:31):
superiority complex and. There's a way to feel.
Yourself and the ability to do the same thing for the longest
period of time, longer than anyone else.
And so like, you combine an incessant need to prove your
value to yourself and you will never stop working because you
think you're a piece of shit. I'm not saying this is good by
(36:52):
the way. You also think you're better
than everyone else, which leads you to, you know, have that
confidence and conviction and everything.
And then you can do the same thing for a long period of time
like that is going to make you very, very successful, provided
you're doing the right thing like and so.
If you're the wrong thing, you're really.
Yeah, you're digging a hole, butbut you dig to China.
(37:14):
But I think it's, it's being able to do the same thing over
and over, even like not even foran outcome, just because like
whether it's like it's just partof what I do.
No different than like, yeah, webrush our teeth so we don't get
bad teeth and decay or whatever.But you don't think about that
every day when you brush your teeth.
(37:34):
You're like, it's just what I doin the morning, don't brush my
teeth. Yeah, you just don't brush it.
You just don't my toothbrush. But I think, like being able to
look at like your training and nutrition is like, this is just
what I do. Then that's when you've won the
lottery and it really starts. You can do anything at that
point, yeah. That's what, if you're looking
for long term success, that's the goal, Yeah.
If you can just turn it into. This is what I do on a
(37:56):
day-to-day basis because it's just what.
I am. This is what I do.
Yeah, you're done. Like, being patient is a
desirable trait, isn't it? Yeah.
If you can train that on a dailybasis because there'll be loads
of times in your day where you're impatient.
If you can, like, control your actions when you feel that
impatience coming on, like you're laughing.
Yeah. And you can transfer that
impatience into other areas too.Good stuff.
Well, awesome guys. Thank you as always for tuning
(38:18):
in. Be sure to like and subscribe on
iTunes, Spotify, on YouTube, andwe'll see you next time.
If you love this show, please like, share and leave us a five
star review so that we can help more people.
I'm John Matson, Superhuman CEO,reminding you to always go get
what's yours.